"The partially, nearly Naked Gun 3 : 'They Saved Crumpf's Brain'..."
Summary: Frank Drebbin is out of retirement and on the case when he learns the fanatical former president and loser candidate Fred Crumpf may not be quite as dead as he left him and he and/or his crazies including his family threaten the newly elected President Woodrowmina Wilson.
Of course, Nordberg is no longer on the squad because of, well, we never talk about that...
Part LVI…
Arggh…Phyllis/Otto groaning as he/she clutched at the spot where the bullet from Hector's gun had hit him/her.
Frank, and Hector, momentarily startled in their struggle.
Evelyn, a bit more blase…Geesh, can't make an omelet without breaking a few eggs, boys.
The struggle resuming…Evelyn pulling her gun as the van turned a curve and rising, aiming.
Oh…Gee…I wouldn't want to hit Hector by mistake. Oops, she groaned as a second misfired bullet struck her. Frank a bit puzzled…Didn't think I had a grip near the trigger?
Or maybe I just noticed that look at me in the bitch's vicious old eye, Hector thought, briefly eyeing the wounded Evelyn as he and Drebbin continued to struggle. And gee…We do wanna make this look real, right? Frank twisting gun suddenly, causing Hector to emit a groan.
Drebbin now with gun, Hector backing. "Ok…Don't shoot!"
Bastard…Bastard…Evelyn groaned. I know he deliberately aimed at me, she glared at Hector as he stood. "Coward!" she groaned out.
Right, like you expected to be shot…Hector, glaring.
"Oh…" Phyllis/Otto groaned now, staring up from where she/he'd fallen back on the opposite van bench. "Someone…Help me…"
"Sorry, miss or whatever you are." Frank sighed, holding gun on Hector, Evelyn having dropped hers after being shot and now fallen back on her side of the bench.
"What's going back there?!" driver's voice on intercom.
"Pull over, two of your people are wounded and I won't hesitate to shoot this last guy and you!" Frank called.
"Keep going, Thomas!" Evelyn called, feebly. "We're unimportant."
Well, sounds like something a good Nazi like me should say, she thought, groaning.
Oh, I am so gonna make that sob Drebbin suffer if I live long enough to take his wife or his $#$! Girlfriend. Though first…She eyed Hector…Yeah, the girlfriend. She has people who can hunt dear Hector down and bring him to their boss, by then, me, for 'interrogation'. Nothing like letting your victim wait on the line a bit…Eyeing Drebbin.
He's not bad…Could get in one good fuck before I'd kill him, I'm sure.
And we are supposed to be more sensible in our Naziness now, I guess. Groaning again as a wave of pain hit her.
"Please…Help me…" Phyllis/Otto gasped. "I have…Kids."
Jesus…Evelyn stared over at the woman. Maybe I should rethink this if the transfer has that effect. Though maybe poor Otto was just lonely and bought into the role.
Hector sitting himself down at Frank's order as Frank examined the rear door hastily.
"I'm not stopping, Drebbin! You better give up!" The driver's voice called. "Some of us are utterly dedicated to the Cause!"
Oh, please…Evelyn sighed. No need to overact, Thomas.
Frank firing at the rear door…Multiple times, several bullets whanging off the metal where reinforced by bars.
Jesus, you idiot, aim for the lock…Evelyn stared as she lay on bench. You'll get us all killed.
The rear doors flew open and Frank ran, leaping…
"Thomas!" Hector called. "Drebbins has…'Escaped'." Slight grin.
"Pull…Over, Thomas!" Evelyn called. "Hector!" grim look as she raised herself up to sitting position. "Get me that…Towel."
And prepare to soon be hunted down like a dog by my/her US agents, if I don't recover quickly enough to kill you myself, here and now, she thought, eyeing him. Hector having wisely quickly grabbed the gun she'd dropped.
Though to his credit, he'd gone to Phyllis/Otto to assist her/him as the van pulled over.
"Tom, ya see Drebbin? Phyllis and Evelyn are shot!" he called. "We'd better get them to our people asap."
"Drebbin must still be kicking, he's not on the road." Thomas called over intercom. "Should I get out and pursue, sorta?"
"No…Let him go. He'll believe we had to help our people." Hector noted. "Get moving. There are the usual idiots coming over and we gotta get out before his people come." Eyeing a car pulling over.
"Yes, go!" Evelyn called, gasping.
"Right!" Thomas acknowledged, the van immediately pulling out, as Hector raced to his bench.
Damn…Too fast. Hoped the sob would get banged around and out the open doors, Evelyn thought eyeing Hector.
"Should I circle round? See if Drebbin made it?" Thomas called on intercom.
"He got off the road, he must have…" Hector replied. "Just keep going, Thomas." Evelyn agreed.
How touching…She sneered with groan as Hector returned to Phyllis/Otto. Do I sense a very odd romance blooming? As he applied towel to the wounded woman/man who gasped and eyed him pathetically.
"I could use that too, Hector!" Evelyn, brittlely. "And you might consider closing the doors?!"
…
By the side of the highway, face down in the grass and dirt, Frank groaned but rose slowly.
Ok…No sign of pursuit…Yet. He wearied looked up the road.
Now if I can…Ohhh…Groan. That's one twisted ankle. He fell but looked up to see another van, the Department's unmarked one pulling to a stop.
"Frank!" Marjorie's voice. Ed's echoing hers a moment later.
…
"Excellent, Thomas. Well done." Morene spoke into his phone as he sat on the private plane waiting. "Bring our people over asap, if you're sure you're not being pursued. Else, best to leave them and proceed on foot if you can. The Americans will care for them, the weak fools. Contact me as soon as you're set one way or the other." He pressed button, then another.
"Deputy Leader? All went perfectly. Yes. Frank Drebbin has…Ha, ha, hah… 'Escaped' me." Smile.
…
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