Treehouse of Horror XXV It's Halloween again! In three tales Bart goes to a new school in Hell! Moe is Alex De Large in A Clockwork Lemon and The Simpsons meet the ghosts of the Tracy Ullman Simpsons, hilarity ensues.
In Alvin's version, a computer virus runs rampant in ''VIRUS, ''Mr Burns traps Homer in his secret lair, in ''The Collection of Montgomery Burns, ''and in ''Reflection, ''people's reflections kill them. Coooool!
In the Tapped Out! bonus story, Hugo returns! (But he's always present in my fanon so, meh...)
Plot
The episode opens in the style of Johnny Carlson's The Tonight Show.
Live from Rigel 7, Conquerors of Rigels 4 through 6, it's the 25th annual Treehouse of Horror!
"What about Rigels 1 to 3?" Oscar asked.
"They are too close to our star and therefore too hot for anything to live there!" said Kang.
With special guest stars Jennifer Lawrence, Warren Beatty, John Travolta, Clint Eastwood, George Clooney, Prince, Taylor Swift, Sean Penn, Bruce Springsteen, Helen Mirren, Morgan Freeman, James Franco, Kanye West and... Leonardo DiCaprio.
Kodos sighed.
"What Kodos..." Kang sighed.
"Kanye West just got cancelled for posting Neo-Nazi comments on Twitter..." said Kodos.
The audience jeers.
"SILENCE!" Kang yelled.
Kodos has a welding torch.
"Kodos what are you doing...?" Kang sighed.
"Warming up the audience?" Kodos replied.
There is then clips from previous Treehouse of Horrors.
The Raven from the first Treehouse of Horror.
"Quoth the Raven..." said James Earl Jones as the narrator.
"Eat my shorts!" said Bart as the Raven.
"Bart! No! The Raven only says Nevermore." said Lisa.
Treehouse of Horror II, Homer's nightmare. Mr Burns has removed Homer's brain and is wearing it on his head...
"Look at me Smithers! I'm Davy Crockett!" Mr Burns said with childish glee.
Oscar chuckled.
Then the Booger Man appeared oozing up from a green puddle of fetid slime.
"What's going on here? Oh how cute! He's got a sweater on!" The Booger man, a cartoon slime monster kidnaps Oscar and um babysits him.
In Treehouse of Horror III, Marge marries King Kong Homer.
"Marge! Marge! I can't find your father anywhere!" said Jacqueline.
King Kong Homer is eating Clancy Bouvier.
Marge face palmed.
"Cooool... man-eating giant gorillas..." Oscar as a page boy cooed.
...
There was a commercial for snake laxatives.
"For when your physician gets suddenly eaten by a Burmese Python." said the commercial narrator.
"Cooooool! Snake vore!" Oscar cooed.
"No! Damn it!" Cousin Hank seethed.
Oscar stuck his middle fingers up at Hank.
"ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!" Samuel L Jackson yelled, startling Oscar. "I've had it with these mother fucking snakes swallowing these mother fucking doctors!"
A python swallowed Dr Nick.
"Herpto-Lax" said the commercial.
"Well that was an odd commercial..." said Kang.
"Roll the clips!" said Kodos. We see more clips from older Treehouse of Horror episodes.
In Treehouse of Horror IV, Homer has just finished the last of his soul pledged donut that was in the fridge at night. He was having a midnight snack.
"Mmmmm... forbidden donut..." He ate the piece of donut, smacking his lips.
Flames erupt from the kitchen floor and Ned as the Devil appears.
"Finishing something?" Ned as the Devil asked.
Homer screamed. A fiery portal to Hell opens. Weird eerie sounds are heard. Uh... it's Hell...
Home latches onto the refrigerator door handle as a strange force pulls him towards the portal to Hell.
We then pan over to a panel showing a scene from Treehouse of Horror V. The Shinning. Homer ambushes Willie and buries an ax in his back.
"Come on you fat lummox! Give me your best shot!" Groundskeeper Willie yells.
Homer struck an ax into his back, splitting his spinal cord in two.
"Ach! That's your best?!" said Willie, he immediately collapsed in a heap, dead.
"Oh my!" said Marge horrified.
"Heeeeeeerreeee's Homie!" Homer snarled.
Then in Treehouse of Horror VI. Homer arrives in the real world, as a CGI character.
Homer screams and falls into a dumpster. "D'oh!"
He soon is seen walking about in reality. People are staring at him as he whimpers.
"Oh god! These people are hideous!" He groaned before continuing to whimper.
He then comes across an erotic cakes store. "Oooooh! Erotic Cakes..."
Yes he goes in there...
...
Then there was a commercial for pie pants... yes pie pants...
"Mmmmm... pie pants.." Homer went Mmmmm... delighted.
Bart face palmed.
"I LIKE PIE! Yeahyeahyeahyeahyeah!" Teddy, Oscar's living teddy bear creature cheered.
Bart seethed.
"Oh crumbs Teddy,.." Oscar groaned.
Clownja jabbered. He sounded like Ripper Roo laughing.
"Yes I know you believe pies should either be eaten or splattered into people's faces..." Oscar sighed to the blond haired little cartoon clown-headed jack in a box thing.
"Do they come in boysenberry?" Teddy asked.
Oscar face palmed.
The Johnny Carlson style opening show is back on.
"Roll the clips you pathetic humans!" Kang yelled.
The next clip is from Treehouse of Horror VII, The Thing and I.
Hugo has captured Bart and tied him to the pool table in the attic.
"I went mad after they tore us apart, but I'll be sane... once I sew us back together." said Hugo. He is holding a ball of string with a needle.
"But you'll kill both of us." Bart yelled.
"No. It's easy. Look. I've been practicing. I made a pigeon-rat." said Hugo. He lifts up a box, pigeon and a rat are stitched together.
Bart winced at his evil twin.
In Treehouse of Horror VIII, The family discovers Bart merged his DNA with a fly's and now has a big ugly fly head.
"Wait Dad! According to these DNA samples, this thing is partially Bart!" said Lisa reading some paper that was printed out by the matter transporters.
Bart was grooming himself by licking his hands and rubbing them all over his giant fly head.
Oscar giggled.
"What on Earth is he doing?!" Homer asked.
"He's grooming himself Dad... Flies do that..." said Lisa.
In Treehouse of Horror IX, Terror of Tiny Toon.
Bart and Lisa find themselves in Itchy and Scratchy's house.
"Uh?" We're in Itchy and Scratchy's house!" Bart gasped.
Itchy and Scratchy arrived, Itchy decapitates Scratchy.
Bart and Lisa laugh.
This turns out to be a bad idea as, the toons, now aware of people laughing at their pain, decide to turn on Bart and Lisa...
...
Then there's a cereal commercial.
"Hopefully with a cartoon hippo stuck in a puddle of gooey cartoon glue." said Oscar.
"Eh..." Bart was baffled.
"Or a cartoon wolf with a big wet shiny purple nose..." said Oscar.
Hank seethed.
Oscar once again showed his middle fingers to Cousin Hank.
"And a plastic toy..." said Oscar.
"Yeah the free toy I understand..." said Bart.
"Oh Chip the Wolf, why did you file a restraining order against me?!" Oscar wept.
Bart face palmed.
Back to the show. Kang is smoking a big fat cigar.
"Roll the clips!" Kodos demanded.
Treehouse of Horror X's clip begins. The Simpsons find out Ned's a werewolf.
"Oh you were gonna kill us..." The Simpsons chuckled.
"Hehehehe... yeah that was a tad naughty niddly..." Ned laughed.
There's a full moon.
Ned transforms into a werewolf. He growls.
"Hey Wolfy! I wanted the news! Not the wetter!" Homer moaned getting spit on his shirt.
We then cut to a clip from Treehouse of Horror XI.
Mr Burns is in his office signing papers.
Homer's ghost floats in. "Wooooooooo! I am the ghost of-"
"You're double fired!" Mr Burns yelled.
"D'oh!" Homer groaned.
"Simpson please leave the Earthly domain and pass on..." Smithers sighed.
"Also that episode was poopy, very, very poopy..." said Oscar being childish.
Bart smelt a horrible smell that made him retch. "So's your diaper..."
Cousin Hank swore frustrated.
"Also why is your Myphone background a photo of sticks of butter...?" Bart winced.
"I like eating butter..." said Oscar.
Treehouse of Horror XII was next. With a clip from the Harry Potter short, Wiz Kidz.
Bart pours milk on his cereal but the milk carton is empty. "Aww... out of milk..."
"Abra Ka-dairy!" Lisa casts magic. Milk is poured on Bart's cereal. Bart smiles in a thankful manner.
Kiss hurry up or you'll miss the bus to Wizard school!" said Marge.
"No worries Mom! Five minutes More-ius!" Lisa turned the clock back by five minutes.
"Hrrrrrmmmm... that's not good for the clock..." Marge grumbled.
...
Then there was a a commercial...
"Uh huh..." Bart sighed.
"For Bavarian cuckoo clocks..." said Oscar.
Bart winced.
Üter looked up while sucking a lollipop.
"Handcrafted by Von Schnitzel-Sprung-Heimer." said Oscar.
"Halt! Sat ist nicht lüstig!" Üter grumbled in a sharp tone.
Bart gave Oscar a "I told you so" glance.
"Oompa Loompa, doopity dooooo!" Oscar sang.
Üter seethed and stormed off the set.
We return to Kang's opening show. The aliens are sleeping.
Roll the clips, but quietly...
Treehouse of Horror XIII, Send in the clones. It's the clip of the Homer Clones falling to their collective deaths.
"D'oh! D'oh! D'oh!"
Oscar winced watching them fall.
"I'm sure they'll be fine, if the cartoon coyote comes back in the next scene after falling down into that canyon they can..." said Graggle, the naked meme character.
"Graggle... That is a cartoon..." Bart groaned face palming.
Then there was a clip from the Island of Doctor Hibbert.
"Hi Diddly ho Homer!" said Ned. Homer was horrified to see him on his vacation to the weird skull shaped island.
"D'oh! Flanders... Now this vacation is ruined..." Homer groaned.
"Homer can you do me a teensy favour?" Ned asked.
"Ugh... what..." Homer groaned.
"Milk me!" Ned was a cow centaur.
Oscar turned green and ran off to throw up.
Then it skipped forward to the grand pumpkin from XIX.
"Awwwww... I wanna be Death again..." Homer groaned.
"No Homer..." Oscar groaned.
"Shut up!" said the Grand Pumpkin.
"I will sic the Kite-eating tree you!" Oscar yelled.
"Good grief..." said Charlie Brown Bart.
...
"And never before seen stories that never left the cutting room!" said Kang.
"We could still save them for a future episode..." said Oscar.
"Quiet you!" said Kang strangling him with a green tentacle.
There's a clip of Homer in a dungeon lying on a wooden table eating his own intestines...
"Mmmmm... me..." said Homer.
Oscar winced.
Yeah he um self-cannibalises himself in a later Treehouse of Horror. 29 or 30 I think...
Then there's a picture of Santa's Little Helper wearing a highway man mask and holding a chainsaw while in Bart's treehouse.
Bart gawked alarmed and freaked out.
"That's gonna be cool..." Oscar cooed.
Then there was an image of Lisa crushing Bart's head in a vice, in the school wood shop classroom.
"That's just mean spirited..." Oscar scowled at Lisa.
"Yeah..." said Bart.
Lisa rolled her eyes.
Then there was a clip of Marge with a machine gun hidden in her beehive hair do. She fires her gun attached to her head.
"Cooooool!" said Oscar.
Bart winced.
"And now for the titles!" said Kang.
The logo this year for Treehouse of Horror XXV is made up of the chopped up body parts of celebrities nailed to a wall behind the curtains.
"Uh Kang.. That might lead to a lawsuit..." said Oscar.
"Why..." A celebrity groaned. Kang zapped his head off with a ray gun.
Plot 2
School is Hell
Bart goes to a school in Hell!
The episode opens after showing the titles as a hundred lines on the chalkboard we cut to Bart in detention, as usual...
Skinner is cross with him, as usual.
"This has been a bad week, even for you, Simpson." said Skinner.
Bart leans back in his chair in a relaxed and defiant manner. He looks bored and doesn't appear to care that he's being told off.
"Concrete in the sandbox?" said Skinner listing his crimes.
"I don't get lost anymore!" said Ralph stuck up to his neck in dry cement I. The sandbox.
Oscar pointed and laughed at him.
Lisa sighed and rolled her eyes.
"Spreading the rumor that today's lunch would be served by a naked lady." Skinner said in a disappointed tone.
Bart snickered.
Some hours ago there was a riot at lunch time as everyone wanted to see Doris nude, for some reason...
"Move it!" Lewis yelled.
"Boobs! Boobs!" Oscar repeatedly parrots rude words.
"I want to see boobs in the soup!" said Nelson.
Skinner stops the crowd of horny boys.
"There is no naked lunch lady! Bart made it up!"
"Yes, yes, I-I knew that." said Chalmers. He fell for it...
"Eeeeew.. guys why would you wanna see Lunchlady Doris naked..." Ace, the vampire boy groaned.
"Exploding frogs in fifth grade dissection class..." Skinner seethed.
In a science lesson. Erik's class are dissecting frogs when the dead frogs explode from M-80s inside them.
"That was Oscar's idea..." Bart sighed.
"Rat!" Oscar popped out of Milhouse's desk to yell at Bart.
...
"There's no hope for you, Simpson." Skinner berated him.
Bart yawned.
"You'll be locked in detention until you graduate to the penal system." said Skinner.
(laughing) "Penal." Bart cracked up laughing.
"Stop laughing! I said "penal," not "penile."" Skinner yelled flustered.
(laughs) "Penile." Bart chuckled.
"It's not like you made me say "penis"!" said Skinner annoyed.
Bart was in hysterics and thumped his own desk, laughing so hard it was hurting him.
Skinner groaned and left the laughing prankster.
Bart laughed while crying tears of mirth.
Cousin Hank seethed.
"Stop laughing at that! It's sexual. Which offends me!" Hank went on a tirade.
"Safe space is in that cupboard, Karen." said Bart.
Hank stormed off.
Bart chuckled.
Bart is left alone in isolation/Cooler. Apparently loneliness is supposed to break troublemakers.
"Or boredom." said Bart. He sat there bored.
Then some hours later or so he is sat cross legged on a desk in the second row from the back of the classroom.
"Hugo always sits like that. On his desk..." said Oscar visiting Bart.
"Yeah well Hugo's weird..." said Bart.
Bart then lays across a desk in the front row.
Bart is then chilling with his feet up in Sherri's chair.
Bart is then hiding under the middle desk in the front row.
"What are you doing...?" Oscar winced.
"What do you do when alone and bored then..." said Bart.
"I'm never alone. Teddy my living teddy bear creature is always with me..." said Oscar. Teddy is perched on his head.
Bart sighed.
...
Bart then opens up the lids of all the desks.
He frowns, because he found a Bart voodoo doll in Hugo's desk.
Bart heads to the front of the classroom and knocks down all the lids like dominos.
All the lids slam shut, except one in the middle. Bart frowned. He walked over to the weird desk and pushed the lid down till it clicked shut.
Bart then taps all the desks with a ruler.
He comes to a very dusty desk covered in dust.
"I also like to lick dust off of things..." said Oscar.
Bart winced at him freaked out.
Bart uses his shirt to wipe away the dust.
Demonic chanting rings out as he sees strange runes. Well Aramaic letters actually.
Bart winced. He gawks at the letters.
The ancient characters are in neat rows and columns, they were simply not understood by Bart as he didn't know Aramaic.
"Hmmm..." Bart touches a letter. He recoils as a jet of fire erupts from the symbol.
"Ow! Oh. Someone could get really hurt by this." Bart remarked.
He has an idea. He grins mischievously.
In the hallway Oscar is loitering while letting Teddy, his living teddy bear creature sniff his crotch with his big wet shiny black round nose.
"Mostly because this turns me on and secondly to enrage Hank." said Oscar.
Hank seethed and stormed off.
Teddy grins while sniffing Oscar's shorts. His wet shiny nose quivering and twitching.
"Oh yeah..." Oscar groaned aroused.
Back in Mrs Krabappel's room, now missing its Krabappel. Because she's dead...
Bart lured Lisa towards the weird desk with Aramaic written on it.
"What is it Bart..." Lisa sighed.
"Stick your finger in that desk." said Bart.
"Really Bart.." Lisa sighed.
"Do it..." said Chancellor Palpatine.
Bart winced.
...
Lisa pokes one of the Aramaic letters. Fire burns her. "Ouchies!" She whined.
Bart laughed.
Lisa frowned at him.
"Hmm, looks like ancient Aramaic." said Lisa.
She gets out a tablet device. "Fortunately, I have an app for that."
A studio audience laughed.
"There's always an app for that..." said Oscar hurrying in. "Canned laughter app.. An app that kills that jerk Hank.
A safe fell on Hank, crushing him.
Lisa translates the runes. Her device does all the hard work.
"Ah ha!" said Lisa.
"Read it..." said Bart.
Lisa seems hesitant. Bart snatches her devices.
"Hey!" Lisa whined.
""He who reads this rune translation will be taken to damnation"?" Bart read the translation.
The desk erupts in flames.
"Ay carumba!" Bart gasped.
The desk glows.
Bart and Lisa gasp.
The runes glow red hot.
The desk erupts with a giant flaming arm of fire...
"Oh shazbot!" Bart gulped.
The flaming hand grabs him and only him and takes him off somewhere. Ie Hell.
Lisa gawks at the fourth wall and shrugs.
"It said He..." said Oscar.
"Well Duh.." said Lisa in a goofy manner in sarcasm.
The flaming arm and hand appears again. "Yeah we get it, smart ass..." said a demonic voice. The flaming arm snatches up Lisa too. She screams as she is taken into the desk.
The flaming arm returns, this time to set off the fire alarm...
The alarm rings loudly.
"Simpsoooooon!" Skinner roared.
...
In a classroom in Hell. A demon kid is writing lines. His lines are "Eternal torment is the only just punishment for the unbaptised..."
The demon kid is a short, plump green goblin-like demon wearing a red t shirt, brown shorts and glasses. He burns letters onto the board with his finger tip.
There are five black desks with bones for legs in the back of the room. Bart and Lisa are thrown out of the desks.
"Whoa! Oof!"
They gawk at themselves. They have horns now, and draconic wings... oh and goat legs.
"We're in Hell?" Lisa winced.
"Cool! Now I can look up all those people who said "See you in Hell."" Bart chuckled.
Lisa rolled her eyes.
"Hi there!" said the demon nerd.
"Hey, pal, what are you in here for?" Bart asked.
"Heresies, like Docetism." said the boy.
"Docetism?" Bart asked.
"The belief that Jesus' body was just an illusion." said the demon boy.
A desk flew open and Oscar was hurled out. He landed flat on his face. "Oof!"
Bart sighed. "Great your here..."
"We were just discussing Docetism." said demon nerd.
"The belief that Jesus' body was just an illusion." said Bart quickly.
"Cooooooool!" Oscar cooed.
"Is that still big?" Lisa asked the demon boy.
"Haw-haw! Your heresies were venialized by the council of Palermo." said demonic Nelson.
"Oh, shut up, shut up, shut up!" The fat, green nerd yelled flustered by the bully.
"Cooooool! There's a Nelson here too?!" Oscar cooed.
Bart face palmed.
"I'll show you guys around." said the demon boy.
Bart shrugged. "Sure why not."
Lisa shivered and cowered. She felt very uncomfortable being in Hell.
...
They walk about the school halls of the Hell school. There are monsters, fun sized, little kid monsters going to lessons or loafing around or putting things in their lockers. Kids can be heard muttering or chatting as in usual schools on the surface.
The nerd shows Bart and Lisa around.
"We've got millipedes, toothheads, screaming torsos..." We pan over to a millipede demon, a demon with a mouth on top of their head so it opens like a tooth-filled flower.
(screaming) A kid with a screaming torso, screamed.
Oscar laughed hysterically.
Lisa trembles and cowers.
"...your bleeding eyes with finger-legs." The nerd continued. Kids resembling those demons walked past.
Oscar is gawking at something above him where the ceiling is.
"What are you staring at..." The demon boy sighed.
"That green gremlin-like kid crawling on the ceiling. He's referencing the box art for Metroid Fusion..." said Oscar chuckling.
Bart face palmed.
"And all the girls are mean girls." said the boy nerd. Some mean girls arrive.
"Red dress, how original." One insults Lisa.
"Making fun of someone's clothes. How original." Lisa retorts.
"Huh. You want to walk with us?" The girls suddenly like Lisa.
It snows in Hell.
"It's true. It would be a cold day in Hell when I was popular."Lisa sighed. She heads off with the mean kids.
"Is the snow a sign I should start singing Let it Go from Frozen?" Oscar asked.
"No!" Bart snapped annoyed.
The fat nerd shrugged.
"Twenty five years I've had to live with this..." Bart seethed. Oscar was eating butter...
A tooth-head was gawking at Oscar.
"Well this is Hell, you're here till you graduate then you're in grown up Hell forever..." said the demon nerd boy.
Plot 3
Anyhoo Bart goes to his first class in Hell.
Bart heads off somewhere only for a large hand to grab him...
"Huh?"
The Principal is glaring at him. The Principal being a two headed demon with one head resembling Skinner crossed with a fish and one head resembling Chalmers crossed with a bull.
"Young man, where's your Hell pass?" The principal asked.
"Well um..." Bart gulped.
"Skin him!" Chalmers yelled.
"Whoa." Bart yelled as his clothes and skin were ripped off.
He gasped as he could see his bloody muscles.
Oscar laughed.
Bart frowned at Oscar.
"Off to class young man." said Chalmers. The two headed principal pushed Bart into a class room.
"Huh?" Bart gasped as all the kids there were demons too. Well duh.
Bart takes a seat.
"So, what would be the appropriate eternal torture for someone who robbed a bank?" The teacher, a tall, thin green lizard thing asked.
A kid throw a fiery paper plane at the board. It burnt itself to cinders.
The teachers sighed. The class were obviously dumb or couldn't be bothered to learn.
"Uh... Someone who robs a bank. How would you punish them for all time?" The teacher asked.
The class sit bored.
"Mm... Jeffistopheles?" The teacher picks out a kid.
Said kid has a long neck and looks exactly like Yarael Poof. Which I will mock!
"Uh... wh-whipping?" The boy said in a squeaky nerd voice. He even has glasses...
Bart winced and shook his head.
"Okay. Good. No one likes to be whipped" said the teacher. She has clearly never, ever met Oscar...
"But can we find something more connected with the sin..." The teacher asked.
The clock is heard ticking because the dull students are so quiet.
"Torture?" A pig demon wearing a jock jersey asked. He is clearly very, very dumb.
Bart puts up his hand. "Yes?"
"What if you made the robber eat bags of money until his stomach exploded?" Bart suggested.
"Good. Very good." said the teacher. She gives Bart back his skin and clothes.
"Hmmm..." Bart sighed relieved.
"Psychological torment. Pain plus fear. Oh, can you all feel how much richer that is?" said the teacher.
The dumb students just glare.
"You get a pumpkin sticker." The teacher awards Bart,
"Ow." The pumpkin sticker bites his ear...
(gasps) "This has never happened before. I have a crush on my teacher!" said Bart,
"Down here, we can make that happen." said the teacher.
No we bloody well can not!
...
The school halls. Some bullies put a kid in his locker and shut him in. They laugh as blood leaks out of the locker.
Oscar gulped.
"Yes the lockers are iron maidens..." said the nerdy demon boy.
Bart is still in class learning.
"Lotta pig demons in this school..." said Oscar.
"Yeah... easy way of depicting a cartoon monster..." said the red shirt wearing nerd.
Any way... back to Bart.
In the classroom Bart is swotting his class, something he never thought he would achieve.
"Every time the sinner screams in pain, the scream blows this windmill, which pumps even more piranhas into his aquarium underwear, causing more screaming." said Bart.
That's just sick...
"Wow. Wow. Oh, that is so evil." said the teacher clapping.
"And I know evil. I'm head of the teachers' union." said the teacher.
Fair pay isn't evil...
Bart rolled his eyes.
"Okay and I tried to date a kid..." said the teacher.
The school bell rings. It's a guy's head as a bell and he appears to be suffering with being a hall bell.
"In life he was one of those teachers who stops everyone leaving at the bell and tells them "The bell is for me to close the lesson, not for you to leave..." That's his eternal punishment." The fat nerd in a red shirt explained to Oscar.
Oscar rolled his eyes.
Bart leaves his class. More demon kids walk about.
Including pale skinned kids with split open skulls exposing their brains, which are on fire. Or they have fire hair...
Lisa reunites with Bart.
"Bart, I found a portal back to Earth." said Lisa.
"Why would I wanna go back... I love it here!" Bart cheered.
Lisa frowned.
"We have to head back to let Mom and Dad know we're alright..." Oscar sighed.
Bart sighed.
"Right here?" He stuck his hand in a wall, it phased through the wall as if a hidden portal was part of the wall.
"Right now!" Oscar chuckled.
Bart punches him in the face with his other hand. "Oof!"
"No, no, no, no!" Lisa yelled alarmed. "That's Super Hell!"
"Cooooool!" said Oscar.
Bart pulls his arm out, he is holding Hot Stuff from the Hot Stuff comics. It's about a baby demon wearing a diaper.
"Hot Stuff? I didn't realize you were that evil." Bart asked in a nervous tone.
(à la Droopy): "No, I'm being punished for how lame my comics were..." Hot Stuff sounds like Droopy for some reason.
He summons a comic. On the cover he melted an igloo.
"See? I melted it..."
Oscar chuckled.
...
Mr Burns's office. It is very quiet apart from a clock ticking. Mr Burns is sat at his desk writing paperwork. Ie signing checks etc.
A flaming pentagram in a circle appears and then Bart, Lisa and Oscar arrived.
"Welcome to Earth. Local time is 10:37. We know you have your choice of portals, so thank you for choosing the Burns Hellport, a division of Gulf and Western." Mr Burns sighed annoyed.
"Are you gonna release the Hounds..." Oscar rolled his eyes.
"No I am going to release the Hell Hounds..." said Mr Burns.
Bart winced.
We cut for the Simpsons house.
Bart, Oscar and Lisa run in, startling their parents.
The kids pant and grunt out of breath.
"Mom, Dad, I want to change schools." said Bart.
"Mom never, let them take me back! I wanna stay in Springfield Elementary! The fire! The screaming torsos!" Lisa said horrified.
"Hmm?!" Homer and Marge sit down.
"I found a place that really wants to teach me, and I really want to learn." Bart jumped up and down eagerly.
"Homie, our prayers have been answered." Marge said with tearful joy and wept.
"Keep your pants on, Marge." said Homer thinking there was a horrible catch with this new school.
"No! I don't want to!" Marge is suddenly stark naked!
Homer winced.
"Why the hell is she naked?!" Cousin Hank seethed.
"Because I like to take idioms literally!" Oscar yelled.
Bart face palmed.
"Never ask him to "Keep his eyes peeled"... Just don't." said Teddy, Oscar's living teddy bear creature.
"Must find a potato peeler..." said Oscar heading off to the kitchen.
Marge was thankfully dressed again.
"It's probably some private school that costs a million dollars a year, and then they squeeze you for extra money through book fairs and silent auctions." Homer goes on a tirade.
Marge sighed.
"And parents get 20 e-mails a day from the school, and everyone hits "reply all" to everything." Homer continued.
"Dad, it's not a private school. It's free." said Bart.
"Oh, that's fine then." said Homer.
"That sounded better from Neil Patrick Harris as the Celestial Toymaker!" Oscar yelled.
"Oh! Then that's fine then!" Neil Patrick Harris as the Toymaker yelled in furious sarcasm.
Bart face palmed.
...
Marge go to the Hell School to enroll Bart. They are sat before the principal.
"I couldn't help noticing this school is located in...I'm not one to judge, but, um..." said Marge.
"I'll say it, Marge." said Homer. "It's in Hell! The lnferno! Perdition! Arizona without the golf!" Homer ranted.
"No. We do have golf, but all the greens are tricky." said the two-headed principal.
"Noooooooo!" Homer screamed.
Oscar laughed.
Homer frowned at him.
Homer had flashbacks etc.
"I say Homer old boy!" said a posh golfer.
"Stay outta my locker! Keep the shoes.. said celebrity golfer Tom Kite.
Homer groaned.
Oscar chuckled.
"We err... we couldn't find a babysitter for Oscar." said Marge stammering.
Oscar pouted.
"Look, as educators, our job is to gently nurture your child's passion." said the two-headed principal.
Oscar does chit chat chesters.
"Hmm. That is the kind of nonsense you're always falling for." Homer seethed.
"Nonsense?! Kallae Kistnaeeeee... MALKAFOFET!" Oscar screeched.
Homer face palmed.
"Mom, please tell me I can go to Hell." Bart whined.
"Hehehehe! Ironic..." Oscar laughed.
Bart frowned at him.
"Well, I guess we could try it for a semester." said Marge softly,
'Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" Bart cheered hopping about the room.
"D'awwwww..." Oscar cooed.
"You know, we have many opportunities for parent involvement." said the Two-headed principal.
(scoffs) "Yeah, I'll be sure to take a look at it..." Homer scoffed dryly.
A leaflet stuffed itself in Homer's mouth, he choked on it.
Oscar laughed.
All of Bart's textbooks were Republican. Because Republicans are evil.
Bart rolled his eyes.
And Long Devision involves literally chopping people in half...
"Coooooool..." Oscar cooed.
Bart sighed.
"Ow... that hurt..." said Hans Moleman, being chopping up.
...
In the Halls of Hell School... Bart wanders about looking at the infernal school. And the demon kids...
"Hey Bart!" said The fat nerd demon wearing a red shirt and brown shorts.
"Hey dude..." said Bart.
"You're his new Milhouse..." Oscar smirked.
The demon boy gawked baffles.
"Oz he probably doesn't know who Milhouse is..." Bart sighed.
Oscar sighed disappointed.
Nemo and Damien from American Dad and South Park, oh and my screwed up fanon arrived.
"Hey Bart." said Damien.
Nemo sucked his blue shiny plastic pacifier, making similar sounds to Maggie's pacifier sounds.
"Wait you know each other?" The fat nerd asked Bart.
"We've crosses paths.. and not in a good way..." said Bart. Ie Damien and his family trying to invade the surface world on numerous occasions...
"Ah..." said the fat nerd.
"Oscar has a point though... I am looking for a new sidekick..." said Bart.
The demon nerd uh Beezle-Bertram shrugged.
Plot 4
Hell School dormitory. Uh they didn't state if it was a boarding school or not.
Oscar is having a nightmare about his wicked, violent parents beating him one night.
This is for your own good!" His late father roared as his hand connected with Oscar's face, sending the boy reeling.
Oscar glared. His parents were supposed to protect him. Not hurt him.
"You little shit!" Father seethed, raining blows on him.
Thankfully after this period of suffering, which is called drama in fiction. Oscar utterly slaughtered his parents when he gained god-like powers. Ie the crimson lightning and being able the morph his hands into Terminator 2 T-1000 arm blades.
Bigmouth, his late sister just stood in the background not doing anything.
Father continued slapping him about OVER NINE THOUSAND times. Because that's a funnier number than thirteen hundred. Okay domestic violence ain't funny...
Morpheus the Greek god of dreams winced.
Oscar then dreamt where've was lying on the floor that a mysterious, masculine, but somehow seductive and alluring voice spoke to him in the form of an incredibly hot, sexy man with bulging muscles.
"Bob stop being so vain..." Oscar groaned to the fourth wall.
"Hey we did Wrath, now we're doing Pride/Vanity." said the narrator.
"Who are you?" Oscar asked, his mind going into overdrive. Maximum overdrive!
Sheldon Plankton winced.
"I am the voice of the author. Here to make your life better." said the narrator.
"Oh Gee! Thanks!" said Oscar.
"No problem kid." said the incredibly sexy narrator.
"Again don't flatter yourself mysterious voice guy..." said Oscar.
The narrator huffed and tsk'ed as if annoyed.
He gave Oscar phenomenal cosmic powers. Wait we need to yell that. PHENOMENAL COSMIC POWERS!
"Hell yeah!" Oscar cooed.
The next day.
"Oz..." The chubby demon kid tried wake him.
Bart grabbed Oscar's nose making him cough and splutter. He woke up. "Sleepyhead, we have lessons, get up..."
Oscar yawned.
"Slept horribly?" The fat demon boy with a red shirt and glasses asked. Oscar gawked at him. "I wasn't being provocative, the thing with sleeping in Hell is you can't sleep peacefully. You'll certainly have nightmares..." The nerd explained.
"Yeah well I had a nightmare about my dead parents hitting me. But then the author arrived, insisting upon taking the most attractive form possible, probably because he's so vain and he gave me my powers and I slaughtered my parents. So it turned into a nice dream in the end."
"Well get up, we have lessons..." said Beezel-Beltram or something. The fat boy nerd demon.
...
Class. Bart and Oscar attended class with the lizard demon lady who has a crush on Bart.
"Now we are learning about the seven deadly sins today class." said the teacher.
Someone hurled a paper plane. It ignited and burnt up when it hit the chalkboard.
The teacher sighed.
The class was silent apart from the ticking of a clock.
"Look I'll have to pick one of you to answer..." said the teacher.
The students scowled. Including the ones with cracked open skulls and fire for hair.
A Doom Imp hissed.
"Jeffistopheles?" The teacher asked.
Jeff aka Yarae Poof from Star Wars as a nerd at school stuttered and gulped.
The teacher sighed.
"Stick to being a Jedi Yarael..." Oscar chuckled.
Bart frowned at him.
Jeff groaned.
"Anyone else?" The teacher asked.
"Torture?" The fat pig jock asked.
The teacher sighed.
"I wonder how Lisa's doing..." Bart pondered.
Lisa was trembling and whimpering in class.
"Lis what's a matter..." the pink bird demon girl asked. Omg she's a flamingo! Or a cohort of Lord Tzeentch!
"I don't belong down here! I'm too nice!" Lisa stammered.
The mean girl demons sighed. "That's what they all say..."
"Lisa you were condemned here for being a Buddhist..." said the second grade teacher who resembled Roo from Monsters Inc.
Lisa frowned.
"Turns out Christianity was right, after all..." said the blue girl demon with horns.
Lisa rolled her eyes.
Back in Bart's classroom. "Well class?" The teacher was still asking her class to list at least one of the seven deadly sins. They weren't very bright...
A goblin pooped lemon drops. Because that's just funny...
Bart winced at him. Eventually he decided to be a swot again.
"Sloth?" Bart put up his hand.
"Very good Bart..." said the teacher.
Bart grinned smugly.
"Geek..." Oscar frowned at him.
...
Next class, long division.
Class were chopping up sinners with deadly axes.
The sinners scream in pain.
"So Mr Gizzard-ripper. I told our class no one likes being whipped. Bart's home-room teacher was hitting on the other teachers.
"I like being whipped..." said Oscar grinning.
Bart gave him a freaked out gasp.
"Enough!" Hank yelled.
Oscar who was assigned him as a sinner and torturer. Frowned and chopped Hank in half while he was strapped in a medieval rack.
"Ow!" Hank cried.
"I saw something like this when I read the story of Theseus and the Minotaur." said the cute green demon kid who got shoved in an iron maiden locker earlier.
The bully demons rolled their eyes. The little dork was gonna be stuffed in a locker and skewered again.
Next was Show and Hell.
Bart shows the class a severed head. Jimbo's.
"Ow! What did I ever do to you?" Jimbo Jones whined.
Oscar as annoying Jeff, the Yarael Poof demon by waving a plastic lightsaber about. The nerd sulked.
Oscar do you have something to show and Tell?" The lizard demon lady teacher asked.
"Yes I most certainly do!" said Oscar. He pulled out a plate with a deep-fried Mars bar on it. "A deep-fried Mars bar, from Scotland... a common item in Scottish fish and chips restaurants..."
"Oh such wicked gluttony! Those foolish mortals..." the teacher cackled.
"Bart's dad is definitely a glutton..." said Oscar smirking.
Bart rolled his eyes.
"Spike, you could learn a lot from Bart, so you'll be sitting next to each other from now on." The teacher said to an orange Tooth-head demon with a cartoon mouth flower for a head and one eye and another mouth where his mouth should be.
Spike sighed and moved seats.
After class was recess. Recess consisted of hurling a live beehive of angry bees at that green winged little demon boy who got stuffed in an iron maiden locker earlier.
The boy screamed as a swarm of bees chase him.
Bart laughed. "I'm gonna love it here..."
Lisa moped about miserable." I hate it here..."
Next was Gym. Where they learned how to keep the Yankees at the top of the league with dirty tricks.
The teacher points to the board. It read. "Luxury taxes = bad. Stealing small market superstars is good."
"What about Tom Brady of the New England Patriots cheating by deflating the footballs before each game..." asked Oscar.
The centaur monster teacher shrugged.
...
Next was lunch.
"Oh yeah, we do eat here.":said the fat demon boy wearing a red shirt and glasses.
Bart rolled his eyes and headed to the cafeteria.
Hank seethed, "And that jerk put this part back..."
Oscar stuffed Hank in an iron maiden locker and slammed it shut on him. Blood oozes out of the locker.
The cafeteria.
"We've got barf burgers, lima bean sandwiches, very hot, hotdogs... they're made with chipotle and Birdseye chillis mixed in with the meat... Diet colas, eye scream... coleslaw with pineapple in it... German potato salad..." said the lunch lady.
Bart shrugged, "Still better than what Lunch Lady Doris cooks."
The fat nerd demon boy shrugged.
"Nemo's having eye scream..." said Damien, talking on Nemo's behalf as he is a baby and can't talk.
"Oh ice cream!" Oscar said delighted.
"No... eye scream..." Damien explained.
An eyeball in Nemo's pudding screamed in agony. Nemo winced.
Bart, his new chubby friend and Oscar receive their lunch, pay for it and sit down at the table with Damien and Nemo.
"I wonder what triggered Karen into deleting this one... maybe I was dancing about the cafeteria in just my diaper or something..l" said Oscar eating his lunch.
Hank seethed.
Bart face palmed. "Oz quit provoking him..."
Ace sat down.
"Ace?! You're in Hell School?" Oscar asked.
"Vampires go to Hell apparently..." Ace sighed.
Flame Magmarashi also arrived. "The spicy food they serve doesn't bother me..."
Damien seethed. "I'll have to inform Dad to find something that will repulse or harm you then!"
Little Nicky was still stating how much he loved Popeye's Chicken.
Damien rolled his eyes.
And Nicky was invoking a swarm of bees upon Henry Winkler.
Fonzie screamed while bees stung him. Oscar laughed.
"Ow!" Bart whined. "This hotdog is really hot!" His hotdog was spicy.
"That'll be the chipotle..." said the fat nerd demon boy.
"Which doesn't bother my asbestos tongue..." Flame smirked while pouring extremely hot, hot sauce on his hotdog.
Damien seethed.
...
After Lunch Bart is handed his demonic text books by a big burly gym teacher demon.
He received a pink book titled Tender are my whipped buttocks. By F Scott Fitzgerald. The Great Gatsby guy...
Oscar is chuckling aroused while reading it.
Hank seethed and turned bright red.
The next book was Fahrenheit 451,000 by Ray Bradbury.
"Because it is extremely hot down here with the lava etc..." said Oscar.
Bart rolled his eyes.
Martin looked at his Fahrenheit 451,000 book and frowned. "I am aware of his work!"
"Hehehehe... callback humour..." Oscar laughed.
The next book was a black book titled I'm not Even Dead Yet! By John Irving.
"Yes you are!" Satan roared at John Irving.
"Actually he's still alive..." said Bart.
"Probably a joke about how the two other authors are dead..." said Oscar shrugging.
Then there was a Bill O'Reilly book. Because he's Republican and Republicans are evil...
Bart rolled his eyes.
"How about Bill O RLY?" Oscar asked chuckling.
Bart groaned exasperated.
Then Bart winced as he received a copy of Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone.
"The church considers it to be the reading material of sinners... because of the fictional witches and wizards in it..." said the burly teacher wearing pants a shirt and a tie.
"Also JK is transphobic..." said Oscar.
Bart face palmed.
Bart's next textbook that was handed to him by the teacher was Atlas Shrugged, by Ayn Rand.
"She's a Right-libertarian. The wrong kind of libertarian..." said Oscar frowning.
"Shove it! Pride Perv! And take your vaccines with you!" Hank snapped.
Bart laid upon his crossed arms and seethed flustered by Oscar and Hank arguing.
Next class was Quantum Satanics. A pun on Quantum Mechanics.
"Quantum of Solace..." Oscar chuckled.
Bart groaned and face palmed.
Bart aced that class too.
His parents for once are proud of him. Bart is in the kitchen with them while presenting his report card.
"He's only doing well in school for once because it's a school in Hell! That teaches its students how to torture!" Lisa ranted.
Plot 5