The Man Who Came to Be DinnerThe Simpsons visit Dizzyland, not affiliated with Disney Land. They went once before when Oscar was upset over Kent saying Santa had died.
Then Kang and Kodos abduct the Simpsons and study them. Then they wish to eat them... on their home planet of Rigel VII.
Plot
The title gag is Otto sliding down a rainbow and cheering. He is followed by giggling Care Bears, the angry leprechaun and gay men...
"No he wasn't..." Bart sighed.
"Yes he was... in my fanon..." Oscar insisted.
"No he-" Bart seethed.
"Forest of feelings... Care-A-Lot..." Oscar sings the lame music from the Care Bears film.
Bart face palmed.
The billboard gag is "Luigi's, home of the breadstick."
"Me likey breadsticks! Me likey breadsticks!" Oscar chanted.
Bart winced at him.
"Shut up Oz... you're a big boy now..." Oscar hissed, telling himself off.
Bart sighed flustered.
"And in other news..." Oscar farted. He chuckled.
The couch gag is the Simpsons at an art museum looking at silly Simpsons themed paintings.
"After all... a Simpsons twist on things is fun..." said Troy McClure echoing what he said last episode.
Maggie was looking at a Roy Lichtenstein piece. It was her with a speech bubble that said "Suck."
Maggie sucked her pacifier confused.
"Those instructions aren't vague... they could mean suck anything... even rude suggestions..." said Oscar chuckling.
The Simpsons groaned and frowned at him.
Lisa's Simpsons based spoof of a famous painting was an M.C Escher tessellation of Lisa Simpsons...
"Aaaaaaagh! Lisa clones!" Oscar screamed.
Lisa winced, baffled by the painting and irked with Oscar.
"Yeah that is pretty awful..." said Bart.
"Hmmmph!" Lisa gasped offended.
Oscar fished out from his blue sweater collar a breadstick. He is delighted and eats it...
Bart's Simpsons spoof of a painting is a Jackson Pollock with Bart smiling having been painted amongst the random splashes of paint.
Bart winced baffled.
"I once created a Jackson Pollock with my own body fluids once..." said Teddy.
"Eeeeeeeew!" The Simpsons groaned.
Teddy laughed an obnoxious, nasally laugh,
"Ugh... Ted..." Oscar groaned.
Marge gawks at her painting, it's a portrait of her looking grumpy. It had been done in the style of Picasso's blue period.
Marge grumbled.
"I hope he had a green period..." said Oscar.
Hugo shook his head disagreeing.
The curators hush Oscar because you're supposed to be quiet in an art gallery.
Oscar stuck his tongue out at them.
Homer's painting was one of those renaissance paintings where everyone is naked...
"Aaaaaaagh! He's naked! Naked!" Oscar screamed.
Marge face palmed.
"My eyes! It burns!" Bart screamed.
Homer scoffed offended.
Lisa felt ill.
The gallery curator sighed and taps a button on a TV remote. The paintings change to screens showing TV shows the Simpsons liked. Maggie's was Happy Little Elves, Yendor and a lady elf were dancing near a bare patch of ground.
...
Fort Springfield. Otto's bus pulls up and Third Grade depart the bus. Ace is holding a black umbrella to protect himself from the sun. He's a vampire, vampires die in sunlight...
"Okay Fourth grade, since our creator still won't give you a new teacher, and your substitute got fired..." Principal Skinner sighed.
Matt seethed.
"So you'll all be shepherding third grade about," said Skinner.
Fourth grade groaned.
"Awww...man... they're little high pitched voices are annoying..." Lewis sighed.
"Their lunchboxes are lame..." Nelson groaned. "Newsflash dorks! Happy Little Elves is lame!"
"They're a reading level below us..." Hugo sighed.
"And worst of all, Oscar's in that class..." Bart whined.
"Kallae Kistnaeeeee..." Oscar rasped in gibberish.
Bart glared at him.
"Fourth grade you will enjoy this outing and you will look after your assigned Third grader..." Skinner said sharply.
"Anyway about the Toon boy with the black and red hair over near Wesley..." asked Ratchet Kimura who was taking over from Oscar as the main character. "The one chugging hot sauce..."
"Oh you mean Flame Boy..." said Oscar.
"You can't call him something as unimaginative as that! Come on call him a proper name!" Ratchet yelled.
"My name is Flame... Flame Magmarashi..." said Flame.
"Flame the Quilava... right..." Ratchet sighed.
Bart sighed flustered. Oscar was holding two thick bundles of his overgrown hair he could easily put into pigtails. He was gritting his teeth and pulling a silly face.
"Oz stop pulling at your troll doll hair..."
"If I let go of my hair, my head will fall off." said Oscar.
Bart face palmed.
Hugo winced.
"Can we swap our third graders..." Martin whined. He was partnered up with Inane Brian, who was picking his nose...
Bart retched.
"Blast that Principal Valiant..." Skinner was annoyed with the principal of Shelbyville Elementary again.
Hugo winced when he saw the plaque staring the historical fort was now owned by Dizzyland...
"Awwww I wanna go to Dizzyland..." Oscar whined.
Bart sighed and face palmed.
...
Oscar once he got home, spent the rest of the day not so subtly hinting about Dizzyland.
Marge sighed as there was picture on the fridge that read: "Take me to Dizzyland!" And the PS.. "PS: Eric is hogging the Disney channel subscription by saving episodes of Paw Patrol..."
Marge sighed.
"Dizzyland Eh..." Homer sighed.
Marge sighed. "We need to sit him down.. his hinting is far more irritating than when Lisa wanted that guinea pig..."
Lisa scoffed annoyed while petting Pokey the guinea pig.
Pokey squeaked.
Meanwhile Teddy, Oscar's living teddy bear creature was sniffing Eric's diaper with his big wet shiny black round nose. Eric blushed and sweated.
Teddy smirked and sniffed him again.
Eric frowned and blew a raspberry with his tongue.
Teddy grinned and tugs his lower lips outward while saying "Uggggggh!"
Eric giggled.
Bart sighed and read a comic. Oscar had drawn the Ricky Rouse logo in it and wrote Dizzyland. Bart seethed.
Teddy was sniffing Eric's diaper again.
Homer then has a shower, the screen fogs from condensation. A massage appears because it was written in soap.
The message reads Dizzyland. Homer screamed.
Another soap message appeared in the condensation. It said "Redrum." Homer screamed louder.
"Homer stop screaming so,loud! I'm trying to put the babies to bed so they will have a nap!" Marge yelled.
Homer sulked and scrubbed under his armpits as he showered.
Lisa's room. She puts Pokey in his enclosure. Pokey squeaked.
Lisa gasped, on her board someone solved her complex equations with the answer " = Dizzyland!"
Lisa rolled her eyes.
"He wrote that on my chalkboard too..." Hugo sighed.
Oscar was annoying Teddy with his bacon soap again.
Teddy was singing in the shower while working up soap suds.
"Lalalala! Trucking! Keep on trucking..."
He then yelped and gasped when he found pieces of bacon in his fur among the soap suds.
"WHY WAS THERE BACON IN THE SOAP!" He yelled.
"I made it myself!" Oscar yelled like GIR.
Teddy frowned at him.
"Also Dizzyland! Hint hint!" Oscar was still hinting about Dizzyland.
...
Oscar was sat down in the dining room for a frank meeting of concern about his hinting.
Everyone except Marge glared at him.
"Oscar, my husband and I are very concerned about all this hinting." Marge sighed.
"But I've never been to Dizzyland before..." Oscar whined.
"Yes you have! Several times in fact!" Homer barked in a fierce tone, making Oscar flinch.
"When...?" Oscar asked with a frown.
"Remember when Kent Brockman upset you with his dark, serious medical and health warning clips. Ie the one with Santa dying in hospital..." said Lisa giving him a sharp look.
"I'm still mad at him for what he said about Santy..." Oscar seethed.
There is a flashback of the episode Butterfingers. There's people going into the front gates of Dizzyland. A brightly lit up and colourful theme park.
"Grampa even went with us." said Lisa. Grampa apparently was there. He was wearing a fez. "Apparently he got rich and bought a fez, which the store owner claimed to belonged to Napoleon..."
"Napoleon certainly did not own a fez..." Hugo sighed.
"Grampa didn't enjoy his time there though..." said Bart.
"Eh..." Grampa was bored while riding a rollercoaster.
"Then you went with Homer the second time you screwed up Kiss Kiss Bang Bangalore with stupid Indiana Jones references..." said Bart.
"Kali maaaaaa..." Oscar reaches towards Bart's chest. The orange shirt wearing boy rolled his eyes.
In Kiss Kiss Bang Bangalore Oscar and Homer went to Dizzyland so Oscar would get Indiana Jones out of his system and write the story properly.
"Oh yeah that was embarrassing when Family Guy inspired you to continue your weird Mola Ram thing with their Michael Eisner joke..." Homer sighed.
Oscar, Homer, Peter Griffin and Stewie encounter an evil Michael Eisner outside of the Indiana Jones ride.
"Oh no! Michael Eisner!" Oscar gasped.
"Cover your heart!" Stewie cried.
"Kali Maaaaaaaa!" Michael Eisner snarled.
"Cooooool!" Oscar cooed.
"Peter that's ridiculous..." Brian sighed.
Peter chuckled. He sang the Indiana Jones theme.
"Well Mart says we have to go to Dizzyland... again..." Bart sighed as Mart was frowning and pointing at a script.
The Simpsons sighed.
"Yay!" Oscar cheered.
"Okay but Homer, no picking a fight with Ricky Rouse again..." said Marge.
Homef sighed. "Yes dear..."
...
They get in the car and drive to Dizzyland.
"You better mean it this time! Not like that horrible Military school you sent Bart too!" Oscar seethed.
Homer face palmed.
Anyhoo, they drive to Dizzyland.
The kids soon get bored.
"Are we there yet? Are we there yet?" Bart, Lisa, Oscar and Hugo chant.
"No." Homer groaned.
"Are we there yet?"
"No!" Homer yelled.
"Are we there yet?"
"I said no!" Homer yelled louder.
Marge turned round and hushed the kids with a hushing gesture. She frowned.
"Are we there yet?" The kids chant.
"What's wrong with your ears?" Homer screamed at them.
"Uh... I'm still partially deaf from that THX sound..." said Oscar.
Homer seethed, annoyed by his smart aleck response.
"Are we there yet?" The kids chant.
"Look out the window!" Homer screamed, he was seriously agitated now.
"You told us not to while we're going through Crackton... I did and a Hobo swore and threw a liquor bottle at the car..." said Oscar.
"Quiet smart ass!" Homer seethed.
"Homer!" Marge told Homer off for cursing at Oscar.
"Are we there yet?"
"We're not there!" Homer screamed.
"Kids please! Find a game to play or something..." Marge sighed.
"This is a game..." Bart smirked.
"Are we there yet? Are we there yet?" The kids drone on and on.
"Okay. We're there. Finally." Homer sighed. They're at Dizzyland.
It still has the small print sign stating for legal purposes it is not associated in anyway with Disney...
Plot 2
Homer finds somewhere to park.
"Yes kids, we're finally there..." He sighed agitated.
"Are we there yet?" The kids chanted.
"Huh?" Homer asked.
"Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?" The kids are fast asleep. Bart has a device playing their bored chants on a loop.
"Damn technology!" Homer seethed.
"Are we there yet?" The kids chant.
"Turn it off!" Homer yelled.
"We did," said Bart.
"This is us," Lisa added.
"Are we there yet? Are we there yet?" The kids chanted.
Homer screamed angrily.
Marge face palmed.
Bart laughed an obnoxious laugh.
Homer strangled him. Bart wheezed and gasped.
"Homer! Hold the steering wheel!" Marge yelled.
Later...
Homer finds a spot. "Oooooh a spot!"
"Homer no! That's for smaller cars!" Marge exclaimed.
"That's just a suggested size sweetie..." said Homer. He squeezed the car in there, scratching up the paintwork...
Everyone crawls out through the windows...
"Okay, remember we're parked in the "Ethnic Princess" section." said Marge.
There was a picture of Jasmine from Aladdin holding a piñata in one hand and a four leaf clover in the other.
"Yep..." said Bart bemused.
A Xenomorph drone from Alien wearing a red baseball cap seethed.
"Oh look you offended the white supremacist..." Oscar snarked.
"Oh don't make laugh with your gaslighting, asswipe! Gahahahaha... Forced diversity is bad..." said the Xenomorph drone.
"No it's good, and more companies should make their movies as diverse and tolerant as possible..." Lisa frowned.
The Xenomorph seethed and hissed with his pharyngeal jaws.
"And this time I'm gonna write down where I parked..." said Homer. He wrote down Parking Lot...
Oscar laughed.
...
The Sorcerer's Apprentice theme from Disney's The Sorcerer's Apprentice plays as the Simpsons ride down an escalator.
Kids from other families could be heard cooing with excitement or babbling if they weren't able to speak yet, ie babies.
Hugo felt queasy. "Did I mention I don't like high heights..." He gagged and turned green.
Homer muttered and seethed.
At the bottom of the escalators Bart danced to the Sorcerer's Apprentice theme.
Oscar laughed at him. Hugo smirked.
"Stop dancing and keep up!" Homer snapped.
"Hohoho! I'm the mascot of an evil corporation!" Bart chuckled.
"Quiet! They'll be our masters soon!" Homer snapped.
Marge face palmed as they walked.
They then got on an orange shuttle bus. Maggie squealed as they got on.
"That was someone else's baby..." said Bart.
The orange shuttle busses head to the park well a ferry to the park.
No wait the journey is worse and even longer than that! They have to climb a mountain via a narrow glass encased staircase...
"Oh crap!" Homer screamed.
Marge sighed.
At the top is a helicopter pad. People are climbing into the helicopters to fly to the next point in the journey to the park. Yeah it's ridiculous simply to play the Sorcerer's Apprentice theme...
Homer and Bart hang onto the feet of the helicopter, or the landing gear.
They yell as the helicopter flies off. Oscar laughed at them.
Homer seethed. A guy was holding onto him. "What the?!"
The guy soon lost his grip and fell to his death screaming.
Oscar laughed. Lisa glared at him.
They finally arrive on the ferry... the ferry sails about and honks.
The Simpsons look agape with joy as they faintly see the park.
"Look! I see land!" said Homer.
"I see Bart's underpants!" said Oscar laughing.
Bart winced at him.
We see Ricky Rouse as the Statue of Liberty as the ferry arrives at the park.
Everyone cheers.
There's an old fashioned Ellis Island family on the ship...
"Mama! We made it!" said the Ellis Island immigrant guy...
"Mama?" His mother, an old lady, had died...
"Nooooooooo!" The bloke screamed.
Oscar laughed.
"Oz that is not funny!" Bart seethed at him for laughing because someone died.
...
Everyone enters the park through the turnstiles...
Then they had to go through security. The security booth has a picture of a tough, grumpy cartoon bulldog cop from the Dizzy animations cartoons.
"Yeah that cartoon cop bulldog is mean to Ricky Rouse..." said Oscar.
Bart groaned mortified as he dislikes babyish cartoons like Disney.
Marge is taking stuff out of her beehive hairdo to go through the security check. Apparently she keeps a lot of metal in her hair...
Homer is given a pat down by giant purple Dales from Chip N Dale Rescue Rangers. The Dales are all wearing police officer hats...
Oscar smirked.
A Dale cop finds a large cartoon acorn on Homer.
"No! You planted that on me, man!" Homer protested.
Da,e taps his baton against a wall.
Loads of giant purple cartoon chipmunks rush towards Homer and pummel him with their batons. Homer screams in pain.
Oscar cracked up laughing. Hugo chuckled too.
Marge sighed mortified.
A cartoon purple chipmunk blocks out the camera.
"Nice try Dil... I've recorded and saved all of your police brutality!" said Comic Book Guy recording the cartoon chipmunks pummelling Homer.
"I feel like kicking one of those dumb chipmunks up the butt..." Bart sighed as he is allowed through security.
"Certainly not! We will all behave on this trip!" Marge said sharply.
Homer groaned as he was still lying there on the ground where the cartoon purple chipmunks attacked him.
Oscar goes through the metal detector. It buzzes with a shrill alarm.
Hugo frowned at him.
Oscar is searched by the guards. He decided to bring several guns with him... including a machine gun...
"Oz why..." Hugo sighed.
They then enter the park. It is bright and colourful.
The kids are in awe. They coo excited.
However a Raphael clone as a security guard stops them.
"Sorry. No outside pacifiers." he explained. He confiscated Maggie's red pacifier.
Maggie, right on cue, whimpered then bawled loudly.
The Simpsons and Oscar cover their ears and grit their teeth in pain from Maggie screaming.
"Okay! Okay! She can have her binky back! Geez!" Raphael sighed as he quickly put Maggie's pacifier back in her mouth. She settled down and smugly sucked her pacifier.
The Simpsons sighed exasperated.
...
They go in the park, past many annoyed families with babies. The families of course were outraged by the preferential treatment the Simpsons got over the outside pacifier rule.
"No fair! So the rule doesn't apply to them?!"
"There's a pandemic you know!" People were jeering.
The security guards face palmed.
A father holding his baby daughter complies with the pacifier rule, he hands over her pink pacifier.
"Fine, but I'm not paying for the insurance." He buys a park pacifier that's been sterilised in a blue liquid.
"Oh, what the hell? Give me the insurance." said the dad as he paid for the insurance.
The Simpsons head to the ticket booths. The other guests are glaring at them.
"Uh we're being glared at Mom..." said Lisa.
"Do you wanna have your ear drums blown out by Maggie screaming all day?!" Marge snapped.
Lisa flinched. "No."
They buy tickets. This bit is funny...
"Two adult tickets and (Homer counts the kids) Ugh... six kid tickets..." said Homer making sure to count everyone.
"Oz stop trying to wander off during a head count..." Hugo yanked Oscar back into the group by grabbing the collar of his turtleneck sweater. Oscar sulked.
The booth operator whistles as if to say "That's gonna cost ya..."
"Yeah I know... I didn't wanna use a rubber and my wife decided to adopt a kid..." Homer sighed.
Marge frowned at Homer.
The ticket booth operators also offered currency that was just for the park.
"Would you like to exchange your dollars for Dizzy Dollars?" The booth operator asked.
"Eh?" Homer asked.
It's pretend money just for the park. It's fun!" said the lady at the ticket office.
"Please Dad." Bart begged.
Marge shook her head.
"Oh no! Not after Itchy and Scratchy Land!" Homer realised.
Bart glared at Homer and using his psychic powers he turned him into a giant jack in a box. Bongo drums rumbled shortly before this happened.
"Oh fine!" Homer bought some Dizzyland money.
Marge face palmed.
The stores all had signs stating they would not be accepting Dizzy Dollars.
"D'oh!" Homer cried.
Bart laughed.
Marge frowned at him.
They walk about the park to find a ride to go on.
...
"Come on, Maggie. The first ride we go on will be for you." said Marge holding Maggie.
Maggie squealed and gurgled.
Bart sighed. "So you enable her tantrums... You never enable or encourage mine..."
Marge sighed and grumbled.
"Hey! The Park rules apply to you lot too! Jack ass!" A father yelled.
They escape the angry parents by waiting in line for a really babyish ride called Mr Bug's Wild Ride.
Bart groaned mortified. "A kiddie ride. Ugh..."
"At least we'll be safe..." said Lisa.
A mechanic tugs at his shirt collar, curly style and does the noise.
Oscar yawned as the line moves slowly.
Eventually they're on the lame ride. There is cartoon voices singing a sappy tune...
"Riding on a bug
Riding on a bug
You'd rather be in school
Than riding on a bug
Riding on a bug
Riding on a bug
You'd rather be in school
Than riding on a bug." Roofi sang.
"Bug be damned..." Bart groaned mortified.
"Bart..." Marge frowned at him for saying damn.
"Riding on a bug... Riding on a bug..." Roofi sang.
"That sounds like Roofi singing... Didn't he get fed up and abandon the concert when a baby threw a milk bottle at him?" Oscar pondered.
Everyone looks extremely bored and fed up. Ie they're frowning...
However Maggie is delighted by the ride and is dancing in Marge's arms.
"D'aaaaawwwww! She's enjoying the ride even though we all hate it..." Marge cooed.
Even Lisa found the ride stupid as she sat with her arms crossed.
"That's it! I'm outta here!" Bart breaks out of the train based ride.
"Bart no!" Lisa warned him.
"Ay carumba!" Bart gulped. over the track is a very deep drop. Bart is snagged on Mr Bug's white-gloved hands.
"Don't get off the bug. Don't get off the bug. Certain death awaits you, if you get off the bug." Roofi sang.
"Will you shut up!" Bart yelled at the annoying singing. He squirms and wriggles still dangling from Mr Bug.
Marge face palmed.
Bart's shirt tears. He does plunge down the long fall. However he has plot armour, being a main character... so he survives but ends up in a train cart that is earlier in the ride.
"Welcome to the bug... welcome to the bug..." the ride plays Roofi singing.
Bart groaned horrified.
Plot 3
After the lame ride the Simpsons walk around the park.
Fat Tony was with-
"Fit Tony!" Oscar snapped.
Fine... Fit Tony...
"Please get a life Oz..." Bart sighed.
Anyway Fit Tony was with his kid who was pulling at the sword from Sword in the Stone.
The boy grunted because the sword was stuck, He had black hair and sunken eyes.
Fit Tony pointed his hand gun into a nearby bush. In the bush a park operator nervously pulls a lever. The boy easily pulls out the sword with glee.
Fit Tony smiles and nods to the scared park operator in the bushes.
"And that boy looks nothing like Michael from The Mook, The Chef, The Wife and her Homer... aka The Codfather I and II!" Oscar yelled.
Matt face palmed.
"Oz That's probably Michael's cousin..." Bart sighed.
Oscar seethed.
The Simpsons pass Doofy and Monald Muck, well people in mascot suits dressed as the characters.
"Oh I really wanna kick that cartoon duck up the butt..." Homer groaned.
"Amen..." Bart sighed.
Marge glared at them both.
"Okay... we'll behave..." Homer and Bart replied in dry tones.
Lisa gave Bart a steely gaze as if she was watching him to make sure he didn't kick any of the mascots or stamp on their feet etc.
Oscar saw Monald Muck, like his copyrighted counterpart did not wear pants. Oscar went screwy again and had a screaming fit about this.
"Pantless ducks! PANTLESS DUCKS!" He screeched.
The Simpsons face palmed.
"Hello Simpsons." said Fit Tony. "I would just like to inform your screaming foster son that this is indeed Michael, I adopted him after my cousin sadly passed."
"I wish to explain how Fat Tony kicked the bucket so Michael will go on a revenge scheme or vendetta against Homer..." said Oscar.
"Oz no!" The Simpsons groaned.
Homer seethed and made a fist at Oscar.
"Let's go in the video store..." Marge sighed.
"Or get some cotton candy!" Teddy said in a silly voice.
Oscar face palmed.
...
The video store. The Simpsons were looking at videos to buy and take home as souvenirs.
"I don't care what you just said! I want Chocolate Star Wars!" Homer screamed while manhandling a store clerk.
"But Chocolate Star Wars doesn't even exist..." the clerk explained.
"I say you don't exist!" Homer seethed.
Marge face palmed.
"Every time we go to a video rental store..." Lisa sighed.
"Hey Dad! They have Christmas Ape!" said Bart holding a Christmas Ape DVD, or a Blu-Ray, do they have that yet? Probably...
"Oooooh! How delightful! Hehehehe... Christmas Ape..." Homer likes that franchise for some reason...
"DAMN DIRTY YET FESTIVE APES!" Oscar screamed while making Planet of the Apes references.
"Never mind..." Bart groaned flustered.
"Damn you! Damn you all to holly jolly Hell..." Oscar lays on the floor while thumping it with his fists.
Hugo face palmed.
"How about Hanukkah Harry?" Lisa offered an alternative Film that Oscar wouldn't scream about.
"Uh I dunno... we are a Christian family..." said Homer scratching his head.
"Dad I'm Buddhist..." Lisa frowned.
Homer scoffed annoyed.
"Yer a Jew Harry..." Oscar said doing a Hagrid impression.
Bart winced at him.
"We're gonna miss out on getting some time on the rides before lunch! Because you lot can't decide on a film..." Marge nagged.
"Well blame Dad for demanding non existent films and Oscar for screaming about apes..." said Bart.
"Kallae Kistnaeeeee..." Oscar rasped.
"How about Zombie Beavers?" Hugo suggests a ridiculous movie.
"Woooooooood... timbeeeeeeer..." Oscar moaned like a zombie.
Lisa face palmed.
"Hmmmmm.. no! That's R rated Hugo!" Marge explained.
"Kids please..." Marge sighed.
"How about Happy Little Elves: Elves 4ever?" said Lisa holding a Happy Little Elves movie.
Bart made a rude sound with his tongue.
"Hrrrrrrmmm... Bart..." Marge muttered.
"I won't pretend to like this lame wad cartoon..." Bart sighed.
"The bear cub gives me a tingly feeling downstairs..." Oscar said while horny...
Lisa winced at him.
...
The Simpsons are then walking about the park again. They probably couldn't decide on a film...
"Whoa, this place sure has changed since Dizznee bought the rights to Cosmic Wars." said Lisa.
"Please do not roar like Chewie again..." Bart whined.
Lisa roared like Chewie.
Bart face palmed.
"Coooool! She's nuts!" Oscar cooed.
Lisa blushed and grinned sheepishly.
Marge sighed. "She's not nuts Oz... Just a little enthusiastic about her movie franchise..."
They see how Dizzy has ruined Cosmic Wars...
There are Storm Troopers outside a wooden yokel shack playing blue grass music on banjos and other instruments during a hootenanny or hoedown.
"Hey Brandine! This sci-fi is better now with us country folks in it!" said Cletus Spuckler.
Bart face palmed.
Then there was an Aladdin style palace with domes with Jim Jam Bonks decorating it. The ride was called: "Jim Jam Bonks's Wild Ride.
"Awww geez..." Bart groaned.
"I preferred Halley Berry's Wild Ride..." Oscar groaned.
"They still have that..." Lisa sighed. Halley growled like a cougar.
Then there was Jabba The Hutt's Tiki Hutt. A tiki shack bar with a long line...
"Ooooooooh!" Homer cooed with joy.
"Homer! You don't need to drink every vacation!" Marge nagged.
Homer sighed.
"Ooooooh! Tiki!" Quiffy gasped with joy.
Oscar face palmed.
"Quiffy you're too young to drink..." Marge exclaimed.
"I know... I still like to dress like I'm on vacation in Hawaii..." said Quiffy wearing a Hawaiian shirt.
Oscar sighed exasperated.
Marge giggled.
"Quiff how did you get here..." Oscar sighed.
"I hid in your suitcase..." said Quiffy.
Then they met Yoda.
"Matt you forgot to colour him purple because you're scared of Disney's lawyers..." Oscar sighed loudly.
"Shut up!" Matt cried from off screen.
Bart sighed.
"Purchased for $4 billion, I was. Yet still hoodie ragged, wear I do, this." said Yoda.
Oscar laughed.
"Hmmmm! In backwards clauses, I'll speak!" said Hugo smirking as he mocked Yoda.
...
The Simpsons walk about the park.
"Pirates of the Caribbean!" Bart cooed seeing the pirates ride.
"Where's the rum gone?" Oscar did impressions of Captain Jack Sparrow.
"Bart you turned manure into DVDs for At World's End..." Hugo sighed.
"I'm still mad at you guys for making that joke!" Oscar yelled annoyed.
Bart sighed.
"That mummy from Treehouse of Horror XX did a great impression of Johnny Depp as a pirate..." said Homer.
"Hey there Homer! The wife's still mad at me..." said the mummy as Captain Jack Sparrow.
"Look! Jack's pranking Chloe Talbot... Hehehehehe..," Oscar chuckled.
Marge's school friend was holding a news story live at Dizzyland near the Pirates of the Caribbean ride.
"Hi folks, this is CNN, the real, truthful news. And I'm Chloe Talbot." said Chloe.
"Boooooo! You're brainwashing the sheeple!" The Xenomorph drone wearing a red baseball cap jeered.
Chloe sighed. "I'm here at Dizzyland where-"
"Why hello there..." said Captain Jack Sparrow.
Chloe screamed. "Security!"
"Chloe it's just a prank..." Lisa groaned in a half yell.
Eventually the Simpsons arrive at the front of the line, or at least are able to see the front of the revamped Pirates of the Caribbean ride.
"Huh?" Bart gawked.
"They revamped this ride because of massive complaints from two people." said Lisa.
"Yeah, one of them was you... preachy..." Oscar frowned at her.
Lisa went "Hmmmmph..." in a curt manner.
Eventually they're on the ride. This part is also funny...
There are liberal slogans now and the Winkies March song from The Wizard of Oz.
"No means no! We know now. No means no! We know now. No means no! We know now..."
Bart sighed rolling his eyes as they all pass signs telling everyone that conquest of primitive countries is bad and that they all should recycle.
"No means no! We know now. No means no! We know now."
"Coooooool! They're doing the song from Wizard of Oz!" Oscar cooed.
Lisa giggled sheepishly.
"That song scares me..." Teddy whimpered. Oscar brought his living teddy bear creature.
The Xenomorph drone wearing a red baseball cap was horrified.
"Aaaaaagh! Wimpy soy-boy, pants-wetting, authoritarian slogans! Nooooooo! Let me be oppressive towards women and treat them like sex dolls!" He screamed.
"You will obey our tolerant new world order! You will obey our tolerant new world order..." the animatronic pirates chanted at him.
...
A Kooky Kat's Deli-Cat-Ssen restaurant. A pink restaurant basically.
"Hohohoho! My cartoons aren't fun! They were just first. I own everything now anyway!" said Ricky Rouse.
The Simpsons are having lunch.
Homer balances loads of tiny ketchup pots on his head and arms. He arrives at the table.
The kids are eating fries and are happy to receive ketchup for their fries.
"More ketchup!" Bart demanded.
Homer rubs his arm, more pots of ketchup magically appear.
They have lunch.
"The restaurants at Itchy and Scratchy Land are still better... They have gory names for the food like brain burgers with extra pus..." said Bart.
Marge face palmed. "Well we're at Dizzyland this year..."
Also every food option on the menu ie sandwich, pizza, burger... had a veggie option so Lisa was happy.
Lisa enjoys her veggie burger. "Mmmmm... guilt free."
Bart frowns at her. He's still a jerk over eating meat.
"Oh no! Kids don't hug the mascots! They don't want lawsuits from paranoid parents..." said a restaurant busboy.
"We're not paranoid! Jared Fogel's crimes were terrible!" Parents yelled as they ushered their kids away from the duck mascot. He lowered his head while feeling lonely.
" And fetch me some mustard sachets, a mallet and a piano..." Bart demanded.
"Ugh... No Bart!" His family yelled.
"He can borrow my mallet..." said Quiffy holding his wooden mallet.
"I'll be the piano!" Oscar Tamaki turned into Oscar the blue piano from Oscar's Orchestra.
Oscar chuckled. Bart face palmed at him.
They leave the restaurant.
"Now what?" Lisa asked what they should do next.
"I wanna see Santy again!" Oscar cooed in a cute voice.
"Oh for the love of limpet..." Bart groaned mortified.
"No! Because you messed your diaper while sat on his lap last time!" Homer yelled at Oscar.
"Homer! He can't help that!" Marge said sharply at Homer.
Oscar glared at Homer.
"Sweetie this ain't the season for Santy grottos..." Marge explained to Oscar.
"Actually Dizzy Land has a Santa's Grotto all year round..." Lisa sighed as there was a Santa's Grotto...
Marge sighed. "Well what is the point of the seasonal magic..."
Lisa shrugged.
"Also before we end this chapter... I spoiled my diaper again..." Oscar groaned. He had messed his diaper.
The Simpsons groan in disgust.
Plot 4
The Simpsons were in line at Dizzyland Hall of CEOs. There was a notice stating not ask questions about shareholders or to the shareholders.
"I want to ask questions about shareholders..." Oscar seethed.
A park worker face palmed.
"Oz you can't still be cranky... I just changed your diaper..." Marge sighed.
"We've been here six hours and the coolest thing we've done is stand in the Cool Zone." said Lisa.
There were people standing under vapour sprayers to keep cool in the summer heat. The cool zone was overcrowded.
"The Cool Zone is beyond maximum capacity. Disperse, disperse." said an announcement.
The people in the Cool Zone grumbled and refused to budge.
Some technicians operating the cool zone vapour showers nodded. The second switched the showers from vapour to acid. Yes acid...
The people in the Cool Zone screamed as they melted and dissolved. Ricky Rouse hats were left. The staff gathered up the hats and put them back on the store shelves to sell again.
Another crowd of park guests stands in the Cool Zone and they sigh relieved by the cooling water vapour.
The Simpsons and Oscar gawked horrified by the park killing guests via acid showers.
"You killed them!" Oscar yelled.
"So? They wouldn't leave the Cool Zone." said the Cool Zone staff.
Oscar was glaring with a murderous look in his now red eyes while holding a big green ball of sparkling plasma. "You're not being very nice right now!"
The Simpsons groaned.
"Oz... no killing..." Lisa sighed.
They decide to pick a ride to go on.
"How about that one?" Bart asked.
There was a ride called the Let's Go Loop. It's similar to The Detonator ride at Thorpe Park. A Megadrop ride.
The people ascend quickly with excited gasps.
However the seats rush up the tower and around the loop too quickly so they go flying off the ride into the stratosphere with the screaming riders. They plunge to their doom somewhere in the distance.
Oscar laughed.
"Ooh, I don't like the end sounds on that." Marge gulped.
"Mom all the rides at Krustyland kill the guests..." Bart sighed.
...
They pass another ride called Future-Land. Future had been crossed out and the ride was renamed Out of Date Land.
The Simpsons pass the ride bored.
There is a robot milkman at an exhibit labelled Milkmen of the future.
"Affirmative. You will buy our milk. You will buy our milk." said the robot milkman.
The Simpsons winced.
"Eh if they're hard, metal robots then Teddy won't try to bite them..." said Oscar.
The Simpsons watch a film about the future.
"By 1994, we'll have drive-in theaters on Neptune!"
"Life magazine will be 400 pages long!"
"Coooool... cigarette pills for kids..." Oscar cooed.
Marge frowned.
" And your telegrams will be delivered by jetpa..." The tape breaks down and shuts off.
"Well, that's it. We've visited every section including Churro Country... where you kids kept fighting while I was using my phone app to find the best churros..." Homer seethed.
"We were bored..." the kids groaned.
"Toonton abbey..." Yes Toonton Abbey, ie Downtown Abbey with Toons...
There was an abbey for that ride, it was shut with a notice stating "Closed due to Anglophobia."
Bart cracked up laughing.
Oscar glared at him.
Quiffy winced. "How would that even work... Toons would be too wacky to take a period drama seriously..."
"But you know what we haven't had here? I'll tell you: fun. The kind of fun attractive families have in commercials." Homer ranted.
"The people in those commercials are ugly..." said Oscar.
Marge sighed vexed with him.
"They ruined the Disneyland Jedi duel stage event for kids in a commercial by showing a severely handicapped guy in a wheelchair with the mentality of a child taking part in it..." Oscar seethed.
"Hey Dad! I see a cool ride!" Bart notices a ride.
"Forget it. I just wanna sit down but the line for the bench is too long..." Homer sighed.
There's a line... for a bench...
Oscar winced.
...
"No Dad there's a cool new ride that just opened up! So there's no line!" said Bart.
Scary music plays as a space themed ride called Rocket to your Doom! is revealed.
The Simpsons head towards the ride.
"Well, my calculations say that this ride maybe 80% decent, and that's just because there's no infuriating lines to wait in." said Hugo being a geek.
Bart rolled his eyes.
"I can be smart too! The square root of the cookie multiplied by rhubarb is LEMON FLAVOURED BOWLING BALLS!" Oscar yelled in gibberish.
Hugo winced at him.
Lisa hushed Oscar.
"Dad, I don't know about this. It's not on the park map." said Lisa reading a map of the park.
"Lisa, those maps were drawn by the first explorers of this theme park, hundreds of years ago. Let's go." said Homer.
The Ramones were about to play Blitzkrieg Bop. Oscar glares at them.
The yellow family enters the ominous new ride.
While they gleefully hurried along the barrier lined zig zag for waiting riders, because there were no one else waiting for this ride... Oscar devolved into a triangle.
Bart winced.
"I'm still not sure of this ride." Lisa stammered.
Homer scoffed and made a horse noise with his lips.
They pas through an area that obviously looks like the detention cells area on the Death Star.
Oscar winced.
They come to the ride itself.
"Oh good. No having to wait behind the gates that slam hard on your crotch when the ride is filled up and you're the next ones on..." said Homer.
They strap into the ride that looks like the actual inside of a rocket.
"Assume seating position!" A voice boomed.
"One seat per person..." a similar voice but in a dryer, less authoritarian tone added.
"Uh... I recognise those voices..." Oscar gulped.
"Come on, start this thing! I'm not impressed." Homer yelled.
The ride folds up and a flying saucer takes off and flies away. Wheeeeeeee!
The Simpsons hit high g forces.
"This is so fake." said Homer grunting in the g forces.
"Wait, high g forces make Homer do impressions.." said Oscar straining against the g forces.
Homer turned into Popeye. "I can't stands no more..."
Bart grunted flustered.
...
The ship eventually leaves Earth's gravity so it slows down to cruising speed. The seats unlock and fold up so the Simpsons can walk around and look out the windows.
They realise they're in space.
"Uh oh..." Homer gulped.
"Oooooooh!" Everyone cooed.
"We've left Earth's atmosphere." Lisa gasped.
"Prove it," Homer scoffed.
Maggie is floating in zero gravity. She sucks her pacifier.
Homer screamed.
"Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?" The kids drone bored.
"ENOUGH!" Homer screamed in rage.
They stop somewhere in space as a huge screen turns on. Possibly communication from another craft.
"Ooooooh! Cable TV!" Oscar cooed.
Hugo face palmed. "Oz that's a comms screen..."
Kang and Kodos, one-eyed green aliens with tentacles appear on the screen.
Oscar screamed.
"Welcome, humans." said Kang.
"There is nothing to fear. I am Kang the Abductor." He introduced himself, completely ignoring all the previous times the Simpsons met him.
"Because they weren't truly canon..." Matt groaned frustrated.
"We know who you are Kang..." The Simpsons groaned.
"And you're not the Abductor..l that title belongs to that creep in the big black van with no windows who drives round our street leering out of the driver's window..." said Oscar.
Bart winced creeped out.
"What the...? This isn't Halloween." Homer gasped.
Kang muttered offended. "Who says we have to only be in the Halloween specials...?"
"Uh... if we let you be in the main episodes that opens up a whole can of what ifs with cameos from Hugo..l Freddy Krueger Groundskeeper Willie... Ladybug Maggie..." Bart sighed.
Kang scoffed.
"Are we truly in space?" Lisa asked.
"Yes..." Kang sighed in an irked manner.
"And if so, why?" Lisa asked.
"All will be revealed in time, unsuspecting humans." said Kang in a shifty manner while dribbling.
"Why does the last thing you say sound so ominous?" Lisa asked giving a stink eye look.
"It's just the way we speak, easily reassured fool." said Kodos.
The Simpsons except Lisa sigh happily.
"What happened to Serak the Preparer?" Oscar asked shooting an interrogating stare as if demanding answers.
"Serak is still upset after the last time we met!" Kang yelled.
"Nice going Lis..." Bart glared at her.
"That was twenty five seasons ago!" Oscar yelled in disbelief.
...
"We must go now! End communication!" said Kang. The communication screen shuts off.
On Kane's ship Kang and Kodos make use of their newfound privacy to watch hardcore Rigellian porn...
They whoop and cheer.
The ghost of Cousin Hank seethed and screamed with rage.
Later after that... The aliens contact the ship the Simpsons are on with Oscar.
"Greetings Earthlings..." said Kang.
"Hey Captain Squid! Make with the snacks!" Homer demanded.
"I am Kang! Not this Captain Squid you speak of!" Kang boomed.
"Captain Squid is a comic book character from Earth. I some times read his issues if there ain't any good Radioactive Man issues on release that week..." Bart sighed.
"Please please! Get a life..." Yakko groaned.
"Make with the snacks..." Homer groaned.
"Speak what you want, they will materialise!" said Kang.
"Potato chips!" Homer said clearly and slowly.
Potato chips float about as Blue Danubé plays.
"Oh no! They'll clog the instruments!" Hugo screamed.
"Careful! They're ruffled!" Oscar flinched.
Homer rolled his eyes.
Homer swims in the zero gravity towards the potato chips and eats them.
Bart decides to screw up the gag by eating the chips too.
"D'oh!" Homer groaned.
"Oh crud! It's a call back joke!" Oscar cried.
"About how our show has been on too long and is just rehashing old jokes for nostalgia!" Lisa cried.
Homer grabs Bart to stop him eating the chips. Bart bites him.
"Ow!" Homer groaned.
Maggie even ate a chip to be annoying.
"How?! She's not even on solids yet!" Homer yelled at the fourth wall.
Homer is annoyed Bart ate most of the chips.
"Stupid kid! You ruined the call back gag!" Homer yelled.
...
The saucer flies through space, it paces Poochie, who died on the way back to his home planet.
Homer groaned depressed.
The Simpsons then see the Silver Surfer and Mrs Silver Surfer fly past.
"Uh okay..." Bart winced.
They then see Rocky the squirrel on a meteor with two colourful cartoon aliens.
Homer laughed.
His family winced baffled.
"Hokey Smokes! I can't survive in these conditions! Whoa!" Rocky screamed.
He inflated and exploded in a bloody, gory manner from being in a hard vacuum.
Oscar laughed hysterically.
Homer was horrified. "Rocky nooooooo!"
Marge sighed.
Then there were Asteroids from the video game Asteroids outside. A tiny ship was shooting at them.
Oscar winced.
Later Homer is mucking about with a gadget. A lightsaber to be precise. He was chopping his hand off constantly. Luckily it regrew so he could keep doing that...
"Homer please... that's creeping me out..." Marge sighed.
Homer slices off some of her beehive hairdo. Marge grumbled. Homer then zapped her with the gadget's secondary function. Purple light shines then Marge has a hand on top of her hairdo.
"Coooool!" Oscar cooed.
Homer gulped like Curly.
"Let me just... There you are, just like new, not a freak of nature." said Homer putting her hair back to normal.
Marge sighed.
Oscar chuckled.
Later...
"I'm getting some more snacks. Because stupid Bart ate them..." Homer seethed.
Marge sighed.
"Potato chips." Homer demanded. Potato chips float in with music again.
While Homer floated after the chips to eat them Oscar was hungry too.
"Pizza bagels." He declared with a grin.
The Simpsons except Homer face palmed exasperated.
Pizza bagels appear. They float from there being no gravity.