Avengers: Search for the Winter Soldier
Chapter 50
The Cherry On Top
Summary: While the Soldier's team is in a meeting with Dr. Golden, Wanda and the Winter Soldier spend time together. Cont'd
Note: This chapter is dedicated to Ro. Hope you like it. – W6C
"Since you honed in on this particular trait, I'll go over that one first," Emily told the group. "We're going through these out of order, but that's okay. So, since Conscientiousness is the Soldier's main high scoring trait, let's go over those sub-traits one at a time.
"This category focuses on the degree to which the individual organizes his pursuits. Those who result in high scores are normally characterized by orderliness, planning and control. Normally, they have a tendency to steer clear of danger and risks, but that doesn't really apply to the Soldier as he is often placed in dangerous and risky situations in order for him to complete his missions. However, that placement is never by his own choice, so that detail needs to be set aside for this particular individual.
"People who score low in this category, overall, are more spontaneous and impulsive. They don't plan out much of anything and believe that "tomorrow will take care of itself" and since neither of these definitions describe Soldat, he received a zero score.
"This brings us to the six sub-traits in this category and topping this list is Self-Assurance, which refers to the level of competence they feel in pursuing their goals. High scorers, like the Soldier, naturally trust in their skills and competence as they move toward their goals. They also have an uncanny ability to maintain strict focus and the self-control required to complete their tasks. Conversely, those with a lower score often doubt their own ability to finish any task set before them. Although Soldat experiences fear of failure at the onset of any task given to him, he does often complete his assignment with little effort or difficulty; he has the ability to complete them, but lacks self-confidence… whereas the Soldier is so self-assured of his abilities that he can sometimes display a swagger, if you will… he can project an air of superiority and arrogance.
"The next sub-trait they were tested for was Orderliness and this focuses on the person's tendency to strive for a life of order and control."
Steve looked up from his printout. "The Soldier scored high on this section, but I wouldn't think that the order and control he strives for is by his own choice."
"It isn't, Captain, but it is how he's been conditioned to respond. Hydra requires him to maintain order and control and so he does. He needs that in his life because they've required those things from him so in turn he seeks them out.
"On the flip side of that, is Soldat. He scored rather low and this indicates he experiences less order and control and is more inclined to experience fear and confusion. His focus is directed according to what makes the most sense to him or is the most interesting at any given moment. The lack of order and control is a mental condition; psychologically he is scattered… broken. His experience day to day is overwhelming confusion and fear. He's more apt to switch back and forth between different tasks without completing them before moving on. It's also a strong indicator of attention deficit disorder. Where the Soldier can put his focus on a single task for hours, seemingly without tiring, Soldat is unable to focus his attention to that degree.
"Now this next sub-trait is rather interesting. Dutifulness focuses on the individual's propensity to regard his tasks and obligations as binding. The Soldier is conditioned to be committed fully to his duties… his missions, even when it is dangerous or no longer feasible for him to do so safely. But - as it is usually the low scorers in this category that find rules and regulations confining and often regard their obligations as suggestive rather than mandatory, Soldat gets a zero score in this one as he did in Orderliness. A zero does not indicate a low score, but a no score. They simply don't apply to him because his responses were confusing and did not result in an indication toward one or the other.
"Moving on, Soldat also scored a zero in the next sub-trait which is Achievement-Striving. As the title suggests, it refers to a person's level of ambition in the pursuit of their goals… including their willingness to make sacrifices to achieve them. Those with a high score are seen as goal-oriented and overly-focused on their task with an almost compulsive need to succeed – that, is the Soldier. Once he's given a mission he is focused on completing that mission and nothing will stop him. He moves toward that goal like a bulldozer and takes out anything that gets in his way. Those who score low are considered more laid-back and approach their given task in a manner that allows them to just "get by" without overexerting themselves. That description doesn't apply to either one of them.
"The next two sub-categories are Self-Discipline and Prudence and in both categories Soldat scored low while the Soldier scored very high. The evaluation for scoring under Self-Discipline focuses on the individual's willingness to tolerate difficulties and even boredom in the name of completing his tasks. The Soldier is clearly driven and persistent when given a task to complete; evidenced by how many successful missions he's completed, the assassinations he's committed, as well as his ability to single-handedly topple entire governments in a single night.
"Prudence refers to his tendency to act only after thorough prior consideration. This goes hand-in-hand with the Soldier's focus on organization and planning. His mind is always working out the next problem. It's like he's constantly playing a game of chess in his head, trying to keep two or three moves ahead of his opponent."
"Which would be us, right?" Sam asked.
Dr. Golden smiled at his concerned expression. "That would be anyone at any given time. The Soldier is conditioned and inclined to consider every option and any possible implication in his head before being compelled to act. He is volatile and unpredictable, but at the same time he is cautious and deliberate in all that he does."
"That's quite the oxymoron," Sam stated.
"It is," Emily agreed. "It's also why I continue to caution you all in not dropping your guard. If he's moving on you, he's already thought of every contingency or obstacle that might get in his way and how to overcome it."
"Order only comes through pain…" Sam said softly, mostly to himself. The others looked at him.
"What was that, Sam?" Emily asked.
Sam looked up to see everyone looking at him. He shook his head as he recalled what Rumlow had told him before the destruction of the Triskelion. "Just something Rumlow mentioned. He said, 'there are no prisoners with HYDRA, just order, and order only comes through pain'." They all took a moment to think about that statement.
"Nobody knows that better than the Soldier, I'd say," Clint commented.
The Soldier watched the Witch as she finished the food on her plate. He'd cleared his a few minutes before and now sat silently watching her. His spoon was set across the center of his plate as Rodzhers had shown him to do when he was finished. Apparently that was some form of signal to indicate you had completed your meal. His arms were resting on the table on either side of his plate; his hands were empty and relaxed as he studied her.
This was an interesting female, this Witch. He'd heard others call her Wanda but to him, she was the Witch. He'd seen her use powers; the red-glowing energy emanated from her hands. Was she a sorceress or a witch? He didn't know but she and the others in her group had put him on the run then. He thought about that briefly; it had seemed to be some type of magic. However, whether she was a good or bad witch remained to be seen. She appeared to have no fear of him and she wasn't regarding him with suspicion or wariness at all. She was young, younger than the others he'd met so far and she was small in stature. Petite, was the word in French, he knew, but Wings had stated she was the most powerful among them. He was intrigued.
As Wanda finished the last spoonful, she set down her spoon and lifted her napkin. She wiped her mouth and gave him a small smile as she set the napkin beside her plate. As she stood up, Wanda reached for his plate and the Soldier withdrew, dropping his hands to his lap. He watched her closely as she stacked his plate atop hers; his stare intense, and Wanda smiled at him only to watch his brow furrow again.
After the Witch moved away, disappearing behind his shoulder as she carried the dirty dishes to the sink, he turned to look out the window beside him. The grounds outside were immaculate; with short cut, bright green grass and perfectly cultivated gardens. As he took in the sights outside he could hear the Witch moving around in the kitchen behind him. She made a comment about what to have for dessert but he didn't think it pertained to him so he simply sat quietly waiting for his next command.
A moment later, she was standing at the table beside him and trying her best not to drop the items she had in her arms. He blinked at her as her sudden appearance beside him, and the unexpected situation in which she found herself, captured his focus.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you," she said, grappling for the can sliding under her arm. "Can you… grab that?" she asked, leaning slightly away to show him the red and white can slipping from the grip her elbow had on it. He hesitated a moment then reached for it. When she felt his hand wrap around it, she released it and let out a breath. "Thank you," she said as she began to set the other items on the table in front of him. He was still holding the can toward her so she smiled and took it from him. "Do you like ice cream?" she asked as she placed a sundae dish in front of him and one at her seat. She then set down the spoons and a large brown bottle that was labeled "chocolate syrup".
The Soldier's eyes followed her hands and the items being placed as if he was watching a shell game. The next thing he knew she was gone again and just as quickly returned with a carton of Breyers Strawberry Ice Cream and a small glass jar half filled with bright red spheres. The Soldier watched her pull the lid off the carton and set it down then she slid from her seat again. "I forgot the scoop," she told him. He heard her rummaging through a drawer and then she returned, flashing the metal object in front of him as if it was a trophy. "Found it!" she said and dug into the ice cream. Coming out with a large portion she dropped it into the glass bowl in front of him. He watched it spin in the bowl as it slid into a resting position and then he watched her do the same with the bowl in front of her. She then set the carton to the side with the metal scoop sticking out of it.
Wanda reached for the brown bottle and popped the top. "Do you like chocolate?" she asked. The Soldier just looked at the bottle she was showing him and then at her. Wanda smiled and upended the bottle over her dish. The Soldier watched her squeeze out the thick brown liquid and it ran down the sides of the ice cream in her bowl. She caught a drip on her finger and put it in her mouth. He watched her eyes light up and she smiled. "Mmm! Yum. Want some?"
He blinked at her but didn't answer. He didn't know how to answer. So Wanda took a chance and squeezed some onto his scoop. She put the bottle down with a smile and then picked up the red can. She held it up high and shook it rapidly and the Soldier watched her curiously. His expression was intense as he tried to figure out what she was doing that she couldn't help but laugh lightly. So serious', she thought silently. Then she turned the can over and pointed it at his chocolate covered dessert and pressed the nozzle with her finger. It made a loud shloooosh and the sound caused him to start slightly. He watched as she created a white peak atop the other things in his dish and then did the same to hers. "Want a cherry on top?" she asked and popped the cover off the jar. She fished for a cherry with a spoon and, after finally getting one, she carefully deposited it atop his dessert.
The Soldier stared at the colorful thing she'd created in front of him and thought, 'so those things are cherries'. Wanda watched him for a moment. It was as if he'd never seen an ice cream sundae before and didn't know what to make of it. She tapped her spoon on the table to get his attention and when he looked at her she held up the spoon, indicating he should pick his up, so he did. He watched her as she carefully dug into the dessert and put the spoonful in her mouth. She smiled and her eyes lit up as if it pleased her. "Go ahead," she told him. "Try it. If you don't like it you don't have to eat it."
He looked at the dish in front of him to see the cherry was now sliding down the cream and leaving a red trail behind. He glanced at the Witch to see her watching him as she casually enjoyed her dessert. He stuck his spoon into it and came up with a little bit of everything. He looked at it closely and then slowly put it in his mouth. He hadn't expected it to be cold and the flavors exploded on his tongue. He raised his eyes to the Witch and Wanda was pretty sure those eyes were slightly wider than they were a moment ago. She nodded with a smile as she took another bite. "Right? Yummy."
After a brief discussion among the team members regarding Hydra's belief that order can only come from chaos. Dr. Golden moved the meeting forward.
"Okay, the next of the Big Five they were both evaluated for is Openness," Dr. Golden mentioned and gave them a moment to find it on the print out so they could follow along. "This category refers to the individual's interest in the unconventional; such as, differing viewpoints or values, unusual ideas or experiences. Those who earn a high score are considered to be imaginative, creative and original thinkers. That is not the Soldier. He scored low in every sub-trait of this category. Usually a lower score in this category means the person is more focused on the traditional way of thinking or traditional values. This is not the case for the Soldier as he has no idea what traditional means.
"He is closed off from making his own decisions as to what should be considered as acceptable. He was never meant to think for himself in that regard so everything anyone is or does, is basically acceptable to his way of thinking. He has no bias or prejudice against anyone for their beliefs or lifestyle, that's the way he was created and that would normally be considered an excellent virtue and is actually considered to be beneficial in such fields as police work and military occupations. He lives the rigid life of a soldier that is controlled in every thought and action, so his low scores do not come as a surprise.
"So moving on from the main title… the first sub-trait we evaluate for is Fantasy and that refers to the manner in which they perceive their surroundings. Those with high scores have an active imagination and are easily bored by the mundane and will try to escape boredom through elaborate mental imagery and daydreaming.
"That describes neither of them," Emily added. "Soldat came out with a zero score and the Soldier scored low; indicating that he is more inclined to focus on facts and the things that actually exist around him." Steve shook his head thoughtfully, drawing the doctor's attention. "Captain?"
"That's not Bucky at all," he told her. "He was always imaginative and creative. He loved books, especially science fiction stories and anything that made you dream about what the future could hold... what things were possible. The Stark Expo was Bucky's favorite event every year. The very idea of flying cars and shrinking men just made him light up."
"And both of those have been realized,'' Clint pointed out; SHIELD had its secret technology that could make a seemingly normal street vehicle take to the air and the Pym Particle had made Hank Pym's idea of shrinking a man to the size of an ant a reality.
"Exactly," Steve said, nodding. "Bucky was the dreamer… he was a lot like Tony's dad in that sense. Like Howard, he didn't believe in the impossible. He believed anything was possible."
"And now he's a super soldier with a bionic arm," Sam pointed out. Steve looked at him with a sorrowful expression and nodded thoughtfully.
"So the one thing that made Bucky so unique; his imagination… his creativity, his dreams about what was possible… for the surprises that the future held in store… all of that was taken from him," Steve realized. He'd never been the optimistic dreamer that Bucky had been, but he realized now that it was Bucky's optimistic outlook for the future that made him who he was. Steve had always been more pragmatic and realistic, but Barnes would pull him into that fantasy world as if trying to show him what could be if we only dare to dream of the possibilities. How those tables had turned.
Dr. Golden thought about this new insight into James Barnes and then added it to her report. The team waited quietly for her to stop typing and move on to the next topic.
"Okay, the next category they were evaluated for was Aesthetic Interest and that refers to the individual's ability to appreciate the beauty in their lives." Every person at the table looked over at her. "Yeah, I know… there hasn't been much of that for them."
"So, wait a minute," Sam interjected. "This shows an up arrow for Soldat… you telling me that he appreciates beauty around him? What beauty does he have around him in a Hydra cell?"
Dr. Golden smiled thoughtfully. "He has no beauty to appreciate in a Hydra cell, Sam, but he has shown, quite clearly, that he can and does appreciate all the beauty he has around him here. Soldat not only appreciates beautiful things, but he actively seeks them out. That's why he has a high score. The Soldier, on the other hand, is not affected by aesthetics at all at this point. He couldn't care any less if the walls in his room were painted slate grey or covered in every color of the rainbow. His low score reflects the fact that he is not affected by aesthetic offerings; he shows no inclination of preference toward a thing of beauty versus the same item dressed in drab. He extends no time, attention or resources in pursuing things of beauty."
"That's just sad," Sam commented in a quiet tone.
Emily nodded. "It is," she agreed as she scrolled her page to continue. "The next section on which they were tested was Emotional Orientation-."
"Now that sounds interesting," Bruce mentioned.
"It's not as interesting as I'd hoped it would be," Dr. Golden replied. "Actually, the outcome is probably what everyone here would have expected it to be. This category evaluates the individual's degree of preoccupation with the emotional lives of themselves and others. Soldat scored higher than I expected, but the fact that he scored in the higher numbers was not a surprise to me. Captain Rogers had reported earlier to me that when he became upset in front of Soldat, Soldat showed him compassion and concern and even offered a gentle touch to comfort him." Steve nodded, remembering the day the commercial about the caged and abused animals had hit him particularly hard. "Those with high scores regard emotions as an important part of being human… they focus quite a bit on their own emotions and those of others around them. Those with lower scores – the Soldier – are less immersed in the emotional aspects of the human experience and often regard feelings as irrational or inconvenient occurrences that should never be allowed to dominate his actions… or those of others.
"When the Soldier reacts to you or to something that you've done, he considers his response to be the logical choice of action and not an emotional response. If you respond to him emotionally, or show him tenderness or compassion, he regards those actions as suspicious. He doesn't understand those feelings, nor does he know how to respond to them, as he is not normally treated with gentleness or with any real concern for his well-being as a human. He is regarded as, and treated like, a tool for Hydra… he's a weapon… and they attend to him with the same focus as any soldier would take care of their primary weapon."
Sam shook his head; unable to understand how any person could treat another as if they were less than human. He, too, had had little compassion to offer the Winter Soldier after their first encounter, but as he learned more and more about the man behind the mask he realized that what that man had become was not of his own choosing. Unlike other members of Hydra's terrorist organization; like Alexander Pierce and Brock Rumlow, he was not part of the organization because he believed in its agenda to pull the world apart and throw it into chaos. Hydra's plan was to eliminate anyone who believed in freedom at all costs so they could rule according to a singular belief and to have absolute control over the entire world. The Winter Soldier was not a voluntary participant and it had taken him time, but Sam could clearly see that truth now and understood that what Barnes had endured was far beyond criminal and inhumane. Those thoughts faded as Dr. Golden resumed speaking and he returned his attention to the discussion.
"The next section is Experimentation and it refers to the individual's eagerness and willingness to try new things, to step out of their 'comfort zone' as it were," she explained. "Now both Soldat and the Soldier scored low on this category. I don't think that really comes as a shock to anyone. Those with high scores are people who have a desire – a yearning – to break out of the norm and want to experience new things. They like to travel and meet new people and do activities they don't normally do in their every day routine. Those are the people who hike mountain trails on the weekend or try skydiving just to say they did that once. It's that yearning to get out of our daily rut that drives some of us to book a vacation in a far off land or visit a place that's full of activities that will stretch our imaginations.
"Those who score low in this category are much more comfortable in familiar environments doing things they normally do. It's that familiarity that gives them a sense of control and organization in their lives. They tend to be skeptical of new ideas and may become confused when forced out of their normal routines."
Everyone at the table knew that to be a fact. There was no need to even question the outcome of their scores. The Soldier had made it very clear that his "daily routine"; that is, when awakened from cryo-stasis he was put through a rigid routine that was repeated the same way every time – after he's woken and before they put him back to sleep. Repetition is the key with him, Dr. Golden had instructed the team from the beginning and this was clearly the reason why. If they had any chance at all to change the Soldier's outlook on his own existence it would only come through a reversal of the conditioning that had created him.
Steve hated the idea that what they needed to do was essentially recondition the Soldier using repetition with the same ideology as his tormentors; to change his way of thinking and, in turn, change his behavior and outlook. He had to keep reminding himself that this is the way human beings learn from a very early age, through repetition. We learn to talk by hearing someone else repeating the words that mean something and showing us to what it refers. Whether it is learning a new language or practicing penmanship; we learn how to become good at something by repeating it, practicing it over and over again until we get it right. Repetition.
Emily noticed Steve's attention had shifted away from the discussion so she thought this would be a good time to take a break. "Why don't we pause here? We've been sitting over an hour, let's stretch our legs and get refreshments if you want something."
Steve nodded and pushed away from the table. He was anxious to look in on Wanda and the Soldier and hoped he wasn't being too difficult for her. "I left him with Wanda upstairs so I want to check on them… make sure everything is okay. Meet back here -?"
"Twenty minutes?" Emily queried to be sure that was sufficient time for him to check on the Soldier and ease his mind.
Steve nodded and stood up. The others stood also, stretching a bit and discussing what they'd just learned as they made their way out of the room at a more casual pace. Steve was already gone, leaving the office door open behind him.
The Soldier took the last bite of his dessert and looked at the bright red cherry sitting in the bowl now covered with melted ice cream and chocolate sauce. Wanda grinned as she watched him, licking her spoon clean before placing it back in her empty dish.
"You know," she said, "most people start by eating the cherry first," - which was what she had done. The Soldier raised his gaze to her and considered her words. "There's no right or wrong way to eat an ice cream sundae though. If you leave the cherry for last, that's a nice way to end it too."
The Soldier looked down at the little red thing sitting alone at the bottom of his glass dish. Wanda reached for the jar of Maraschino cherries and opened it. The soft sound it made as she unscrewed the lid made him look up. She fished a cherry out of the jar with a spoon and dropped it into her dish.
Closing the jar she placed it off to the side and picked up the cherry by the stem. She dangled it in front of her and then gave him a nod, indicating he should do the same. He looked down at the one in his dish and picked it up by the stem in the same manner, holding it in front of himself. Wanda smiled at him and then put the cherry in her mouth and popped the stem off before chewing it.
He watched her and then followed suit; putting the cherry in his mouth he pulled the stem off. The flavor was really sweet on his tongue and when he began to chew it the syrup it had been soaked in flooded his mouth. He blinked and looked at her again. Wanda was certain that she could see a hint of something in his eyes. She wouldn't go so far as to say it was delight, but it was some sort of positive response. She smiled at his hint of a reaction to the pleasant experience but didn't make a big deal about it.
They had finished their dessert, so Wanda brought him and their dishes back to the kitchen. Their lunch plates were still in the sink and instead of loading them in the dishwasher she decided instead to wash them by hand – with the Soldier's assistance.
She filled the left side of the sink with soapy water and the right side with just water and picked up the sponge. She washed one plate as he watched and then dunked it into the right side to rinse it off and placed it the dish drainer to the side. She offered him the sponge and he took it from her. Then Wanda picked up the plate she had just washed and began drying it with a dish towel. When that was done properly she opened a cupboard and placed the plate atop the stack on the shelf. The Soldier watched everything she did with unwavering focus. She then turned to him and said, "You wash and rinse… I'll dry and put them away."
He considered her for a moment as she waited patiently for him to respond. The Soldier looked down at the suds in the sink and reached into the water with his metal hand and came out with a soap covered plate. He washed it precisely the way she had done the first and then dunked it into the clear water before placing it in the dish rack. Wanda gave him an approving smile and nodded as she picked up the plate to wipe it dry.
They worked side by side and by the time they got to the spoons she was simply taking them from his hand and as they neared finishing he was actually handing them to her and even waiting patiently for her to take it from his hand as he dripped water onto the floor.
"Oh… thank you," Wanda said as she took the last spoon from his hand and began to dry it with the damp towel.
"What's going on here?" Steve's voice held a tone of pleasant surprise as it came from behind them. The Soldier looked over at him as Wanda spun on her toes to face him with a big smile. Steve couldn't help but smile back at her, placing his hands on his hips he laughed softly. "What are you two doing?" he asked lightly, extremely pleased to see the two of them actually engaged in an activity together. It was not part of his normal routine to wash dishes and seeing the Soldier engaged in the activity standing beside her made Steve's spirit soar. He may not be inclined to step outside of his normal or expected routine on his own accord, but Steve had a bit of hope restored that it might be possible to adjust his conditioned responses, as Dr. Golden had stated. They had to start showing him normal activities and letting him participate in them and this sight gave Steve a true glimmer of hope.
"We made paprikash for lunch," she replied, turning to look at the man beside her to include him in the 'we' and then looked back at Steve. "Then we had ice cream sundaes for dessert… I think he likes ice cream," she added, still beaming, "and he loves my paprikash."
"Oh, he loves it, does he?" Steve asked, still smiling.
"Yes, he does," she answered, keeping a light-hearted tone.
"Did he tell you that?" Steve teased her.
"Well… not exactly…" she admitted, "but I could tell."
"Uh huh," Steve nodded, still grinning.
"- and he just helped me with the dishes."
"He did –." Steve stated with a nod. It wasn't a question as much as it was an observation. He could clearly see that they had just washed the dishes together; seeing the Winter Soldier taking part in such a normal, domestic chore, just...
So he hadn't actually seen the whole action, but the Soldier was still standing there holding a sponge in his soap covered hand that was dripping water onto the floor.
Steve was still smiling… a genuine wide smile and his heart was pounding against his sternum. To see the Soldier taking an active part in something so mundane… so… normal, as washing the dishes gave him so much hope for the Soldier's future, for Bucky's future… this was something that Cap hadn't been sure was even possible just moments before.
TBC'd