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Hermione's Point of View.
"Are you going to eat that?" Ron asks pointing to the baked potato on my plate. I sigh.
"Ron," I say pointing towards the entire platter of potatoes beside him.
"Yeah, but those are for everyone and you're just going to waste that one if you don't eat it." He says digging his fork into the potato.
"You are honestly unbelievable Ron," I laugh as he puts butter on top and lets it melt over.
"Hermione, I come from a very big household okay if you stop eating for a second everything on your plates is at risk of being snatched," he jokes and I scoff back into my cranberry juice eyeing Ginny.
"Don't look at me! He's not wrong," she laughs.
"We wouldn't really understand Hermione. We come from small families," Harry adds patting my shoulder. I smile back as everyone laughs at Ron devouring the potato. When he's finished, he throws his arm around my shoulders and pulls me in close.
"But come now, we're all here so you have to tell us what's wrong Hermione," Ron asks, keeping me pulled tight against him. It feels warm and safe and I exhale a breath, feeling my shoulders relax.
"What do you mean?" I ask, staring into his shoulder so he can't look at my face.
"We've all noticed something has been up with you," Ron says. He squeezes me comfortingly again. "But we're here if you want to talk," he assures me. I lean my head on his shoulder and look at Ginny's similar reassuring smile. Harry takes my hand in his and gives it a little squeeze. I feel warm all over just from being near them all.
"I'm sorry I haven't been myself the last few days," I admit, embarrassed.
"Don't worry about it Hermione," Ginny says. "We understand you've been going through a lot especially with Malfoy stealing away your opportunity."
"Yeah, I still can't believe Dumbledore just allowed that whole thing to happen given your history. I mean everyone knows what kind of scum he is." Ron interjects. They start to talk over one another about the situation, each voicing their opinion. The constant mention of Malfoys name makes my head spin.
"Can we just not talk about Malfoy anymore," I say, raising my voice to be heard over them. They turn and look at me and smile apologetically.
"We're sorry," Ron smiles down at me, rubbing his arm up and down mine. I lean into him a little and it's comforting.
"We just want you to be happy," Ginny adds. I stare at their expressions and feel embarrassed about the whole situation with Malfoy and how I'm technically lying to them by not telling them about it.
"I have a question," I say, gathering their attention.
"Go on," Harry says.
"What would you do if someone was asking something of you. Something a little odd, and perhaps difficult," I say unsure of myself.
"Well if it makes you uncomfortable you shouldn't do it," Ginny says.
"A friend wouldn't ask something of you that made you feel uncomfortable," Harry adds.
"Yeah but sometimes in life, we have to do things that are difficult," Ron chimed in. "But maybe you should be wondering why this person is asking you to do something that makes you uncomfortable," he adds. "What do they get out of it?" he says.
I turn to look up at his face as he looks at me with intrigue.
"People always have ulterior motives," he adds.
"When did you get so smart," Ginny says exploding into laughter to which Harry and I quickly follow.
"Hey," Ron laughs throwing potato skin towards Ginny. "Hermione isn't the only smart one," he jokes.
Ron's words give me food for thought as I think more about the situation. What would Malfoy get out of me staying away from Ron? I know that he doesn't like Ron but he hates me equally. Ron squeezes me close again as I smile into his shoulder. I scan around the hall looking at the other students laughing also, carefree enjoying their lunch. When I find the Slytherin table Draco Malfoy is watching me. My stomach drops a little when our eyes connect.
I'll be watching he had warned. Seems Draco Malfoy is true to his word. His jaw clenches as he glares at me. I scrunch my eyebrows together in confusion. Surely, he must know that there is nothing going on between Ron and I. I look up at Ron and view the situation and a small part of me can understand how it might be going against our agreement. I lean away from Ron and grab my glass of cranberry juice, taking a long swing.
Ron dismisses it nonchalantly and lets his arm drop back to his side, not breaking the conversation with Harry. I give Malfoy a look enquiring is it happy now and he averts his eyes.
"Hermione, you'll come to my room tonight to get ready for Slughorn's right?" Ginny asks and I nod, a little shaken from being under Malfoys scrutiny.
"What time will ye be ready at, do you think?" Harry asks.
"Around eight," Ginny answers.
"Okay, Ron and I should be ready around then too. Well, I'm ready now," Harry laughs as he and Ron get up from the table. I turn to Ron accusingly.
"And who are you going with Mr," I ask, jokingly. He grabs his bag and pats me on the head with his notebook.
"With you stupid, duh!" he laughs. "I'm not going to miss the party everyone else is going to," he says as he and Harry leave for class. I turn to Ginny in a panic.
"What was that about?" I ask, grabbing her arm.
"Woah girl, calm down. What's wrong?" she asks grabbing her bag.
"Why does Ron think we're going to Slughorn's party together," I ask.
"What do you mean? I told him we were all going and I mentioned you didn't have a date and he really wanted to go. Is there something wrong?" Ginny asks, confused.
"Oh my god, do you have a date or something you didn't tell us about?" She enquires with a shocked expression. Her face falls into the shape of an 'O'. I wave her off.
"Of course not," I assure her. "I was just a little confused," I admit. Ginny eyes me a little sceptical.
"It will be fine Hermione. I doubt he's expecting flowers," Ginny jokes. "He just doesn't want to be left out for the evening when we're all going," she adds.
That's all well and good I just hope Malfoy see it that way too. I stare over at his table as Ginny and I make our way out of the great hall and true to his word; he's watching.
Draco's Point of View
"I guess you won't be going tonight," Blaise smirks, eyeing Pansy and Nott across the classroom.
"They look awful cosy together don't you think?" Blaise notes. I look over at them watching as Pansy seems to have him wrapped around her little finger.
"He's the one who's going to have to listen to her shit all the time, not me," I say, opening our potions book. I mark down the ingredients and hand them to Blaise.
"Anyways I don't want to go to some stupid party with Slughorn," I add as Blaise snatches the list from me and reluctantly heads outside to the garden. I watch as the other students divide up the tasks and half the class heads outside. With the room feeling smaller and more secluded I move to the right side of the workstation and eye Granger. She's making an awful lot of noise trying to pretend she's busy.
"What was that today," I say quietly, looking around the room to make sure no one is watching us. Fortunately, the other remaining students are looking through their textbook or talking to one another.
"I don't know what you mean," she mumbles back, flipping a page.
"Really? You've no idea, huh?" I ask. She eyes me briefly and has a look around the room.
"I thought I made myself clear about the weasel, Granger," I say deeply. She moves away from her textbook and leans over at me across the workstation.
"Ron and I are friends, Malfoy. I can't just cut him from my life. I don't know what you think is going on but you're wrong," she scowls. I smirk inwardly. What a naïve girl.
"Unfortunately, Granger you are only book smart. You don't seem to notice things right in front of your nose," I say, watching her. She furrows her brows together as a hint of anger crosses her face. She has to work considerably to keep it at bay. But something in me feels the need to keep poking like I want to see her at her worst. To see Hermione Granger really get mad stirs a sort of excitement in me.
"Unfortunately for you Malfoy, you are neither if you think there is anything there between us. Ron considers me just a friend," she slanders back at me.
"And how do you consider him?" I ask. It's out in the open before I can take it back. Her face scrunches up. I keep a carefully crafted smirk in place.
"I don't want to play these games with you Malfoy. I am lying to my friends for you and I don't even know why. Why do you want this? What do you get out of this?" she asks, leaning across at me, her voice low as she gives another quick scan around the room.
"I have held up my end of the bargain Granger it's not my fault you chose to squander the questions. Therefore, I don't have to explain myself to you," I snap back.
"Are you going to keep up your end of the bargain or not?" I ask as Blaise and the weasel seem to be making their way back into the classroom. She seems to notice them at the same time as I do. She weights the question in her head as our eyes search each other with malice across the work station. Finally, she nods slowly as the weasel takes his place beside her.
Blaise eyes Granger sceptically and it turns my stomach. It was such a short conversation surely, he couldn't have heard anything or picked up on anything. Even Blaise Zabini isn't that good. But he watches her nonetheless. I pull the ingredients out of the basket as Slughorn wanders around the class talking to the students.
Granger laughs at something the weasel said and I watch the easiness between them. I compare it begrudgingly to all the relationships I have and I cannot say that I have an easiness like that with anyone. Most of my relationships with people were formed before I even started at Hogwarts. My father introduced me to Blaise when we were 10 years old and I knew of Pansy from Blaise before we even got on the train. Crab and Goyle seemed to just fall into the group almost without invitation. There is an understanding between us and a small amount of loyalty affiliated with sharing the same cause. But other than that Granger and I do not sure the same types of relationships.
Her relationships are based on normal things such as similarities and friendship alongside support and comfort. She - because of her status - is allowed to pick and chose who she has in her life and for that small detail, I envy her greatly. Everyone else in this room including Granger gets to choose the way in which they want their life to go and who they want around them. I look at weasel and wonder how he would cope in my situation. But then I shudder to think about how I would cope with his. But maybe I could give up the mansion and the servants if it meant I was allowed free will.
"So what colour are you wearing tonight?" I hear the weasel say from across the shared workstation. I pause, letting the potions textbook fall open on a random page not associated at all with the work we're doing. I don't notice Blaise watching.
"I'm not really sure how this is supposed to go. Is it a kind of event where I have to match my tie to your dress colour?" he asks her indifferently. I look over at her to see she's trying to hide her face. I guess Granger doesn't plan to keep her side of the agreement at all if they're both going to Slughorn's together. How dare she lie to me so easily.
I continue to flick the pages in the book as I try to keep my temper at bay.
"No, it's nothing like that Ronald you can wear whatever you want. We don't have to be matching. I mean it's not like we're going together-together," she says eyeing me. I glare back at her.
"Oh well,- I mean I guess so. If that's what you want." The weasel excuses himself from the table to get something off the shelf. Granger visibly relaxes and something in the obvious rejection twists at my stomach. I clear my throat and start adding to the potion feeling a little smug.
When Blaise noticeably disconnects from the work to talk across the room with Goyle, Granger allows herself to look at me. It's obvious since she's been trying so hard not to meet my eye for the last forty-five minutes. But when I look at her now, I see the women from the first future, the one that I am in. The older Granger with our child and the women in the bed. I don't know what it is that causes me to see her this way now or even why. But it just happens. It's not exactly like I imagine myself there it's just the way she appears in my head now. The same Granger but slightly mature and not as naïve as she is now.
When the weasel comes back to the work station he holds his tails between his legs and I can't stop the smirk that comes. Blaise notices and that worries me so I try to hide it and focus on the cauldron. When he looks back to answer Goyle I stare at her again, really looking this time at her. I can safely say that I have never really looked at Granger this way before. I didn't have much reason too. She may as well have been a different species with the way we viewed them. But seeing what I saw in the pensive has seemed to chip away at something inside me. Begrudgingly I notice her now in a way I didn't before and If I'm not one hundred per cent on my game Blaise is going to notice too.
The worse outcome is not that I should end up with her as I saw in the pensive. But merely that it is now possible after what I saw. Because it changed how I see her. I now see her for what she is. Just another girl on equal grounds with the rest and that scares me.
I shake my head and push those thoughts aside, chalking them down to momentary weakness brought on my stress and fear. Anxiety about what has to be done.
When the bell sounds for the end of school the weasel grabs Grangers bag and slings it over his shoulder as they walk side by side out of the classroom. I stare at the thin wire of her bag strap and think how I'd like to wrap it around the weasel's neck.
Hermione's Point of View.
Ginny pulls the brush through my hair and I grab at my scalp.
"My god Ginny!" I shout, pushing against my scalp to stop the pain.
"What do you want me to do Hermione? It's like a living, breathing monster!" Ginny laughs and I laugh along with her.
"I'll be back in a minute I'm going to go and ask Lavender the spell she uses for her hair," Ginny says leaving the dormitory. Padma sits in the corner staring at her dress hanging up on the locker.
"You excited?" I ask, watching her. She turns around and smiles sadly at me.
"Sort of, I guess," she answers.
"What do you mean sort of?" I ask, confused.
"Well I was too nervous to ask anyone to go with me so I asked my sister," she admits, embarrassed. I blush a little too.
"And, where is the shame in that?" I answer trying to seem confident.
"I was going to go on my own too but- "
"But you're not," Padma interjects. "I'll be the only girl there by themselves." She sobs.
"Don't be silly no one is even going to notice you brought your sister. This is only a small party I wouldn't worry Padma," I assure her. She wipes the tears off her cheeks and smiles at me.
"Now, feeling better?" I ask. She smiles back and takes the dress off the hanger and starts to get ready. I turn around and face myself in the mirror and try to finish combing through my hair but Ginny is right, it seems like a lost cause.
When Ginny finally arrives back, I'm already dressed and she mumbles a quick spell turning my head into a more manageable mess.
"I suppose it's better than it was. What do you think?" She asks me. I turn to face the mirror and notice although it is the same hair it's a lot less frizzy now. The curls sit loose down my shoulders rather than in a giant heap.
"It's lovely Ginny thank you," I say. Ginny gets ready quickly and we head down to the common room to meet the boys. They're standing beside the fireplace with Seamus looking smug. When Ginny and I walk up they seem to shuffle around hiding something.
"Come on now. What is it you've got?" Ginny asked putting out her hand like their mother. Harry blushes and points to Seamus who elbows him in the ribs.
"Wait to sell me out under pressure, Potter!" Seamus berates him to which Harry only laughs in return. Seamus hands over a small flash to Ginny.
"You were going to sneak alcohol into a party that's being thrown by one of the professors. Are ye all stupid?" Ginny says angrily. Ron raises his hands in defence looking around for someone else to blame. She hands the flask back to Seamus who looks shocked and slightly relieved.
"Do whatever ye want! Just don't involve me or Hermione," she says leaving the common room. I quickly follow her leaving the boys to it.
Inside the small classroom, the room hardly looks like it did a few hours ago. The candles are more festive as they float around the high ceiling. Banners hang around reading festive spells that cause tinsel to pour out of the tip of your wand. I lean against the counter near the back of the room watching everyone. Although the clock only says 9.30 pm it feels like I've been here listening to this whiny piano music for the last 4 hours. I turn to find Ginny to see her standing flirting with Dean Thomas and although it's a little out of character for her she looks happy in his company. Harry, on the other hand, has magically changed into a foul humour while Ron tries to cheer him up near the pumpkin juice fountain. They pass a flask back and forth to one another and I roll my eyes at them.
I look around the room and watch everyone, noticing who's talking to who and who might be flirting. It's something I rarely ever do. But I suppose in this context where nothing else can be done it's all I have left. Although there are people from every house in this room somehow the Slytherin's keep to themselves over by the floating glass display. I notice Pansy hand in Nott's and wonder how long they have been a thing. I was under the impression that Pansy fancied herself more with Malfoy. Clearly, she makes the rounds.
When I scan the room again, I notice someone else. Someone who's not only by themselves but also looking at me. Blaise Zabini. A shudder of discomfort rolls through me as our eyes meet. I don't like it. He smirks at me and I think I'm imagining it. Did Malfoy tell him about our arrangement? Surely not. Malfoy wouldn't want anyone to know we even speak to one another. I move away from the curtains and make my way towards Ginny as she picks an appetizer off one of the floating plates.
"Ginny, I think I might just head back to the dormitories I have an ancient runes test tomorrow and I want to get a little studying in before I go to sleep," I mention. Ginny groans.
"Hermione! Come on," Ginny exclaims loudly. "We never get to go anywhere and the first time we get to go to a party you want to go home early. Please stay with me," Ginny begs. I blush, my cheeks feeling hot under her gaze.
"I'm sorry Ginny. But you can stay I really don't mind. I'm just going to head back now, okay?" Reluctantly after much persisting, Ginny finally agrees to stay and let me go alone. I hug her and thank her again for doing my hair. I wave at Dean as I leave and duck away from Ron and Harry before I have to have the same long drawn out fight with them too about wanting to leave early.
Outside the hall and away from the noise I feel a weight off my shoulders. There is something about being in a room with so many people and feeling that you have to act a certain way that drains me terribly. I make my way back to the Gryffindor dormitories slowly, feeling comfort in the quiet of the hallways. That is until I hear a set of footsteps following me.
At first, I don't react much. I keep up the same pace and pretence while trying to hear them. Trying to see if I recognise the footstep pattern. But I don't. When I round the corner by the entrance to the bridge I pick up the pace worried that I might get caught on the bridge with a stranger.
"In a rush, Granger?" a voice calls from behind. When I turn around, I see Blaise Zabini following close behind me. It's not that I'm scared of Blaise on a normal day. But it's late and the hallways are empty and he looks well over 6 foot.
"I'm heading back to my dormitory. What are you doing out here?" I ask, trying to keep my voice straight. He eyes me and grins.
"Just thought I'd take a walk and clear my head. Nice night for it don't you think?" Blaise asks stepping close to me. I step back towards the doorway to the bridge. It's either I walk out onto the bridge alone with him or I turn back the way we came and head back to the party. I don't like either of those options. Blaise steps closer again making the distance between us about an arm's length. I can feel the fear now. I think about turning and running, surely he won't be able to catch up with me if he's caught off guard. I steady myself and start to turn my leg when a figure appears behind him coming around the corner.
"Zabini, I've been looking for you," Malfoy calls from down the hallway we've just come from. He's dressed in his robes with the hood hanging down over his forehead, as he makes his way towards us. I peak out around Blaise's shoulder to see Malfoy's expression. It's not good. But Blaise has a smug knowing look on his face as he turns around. I don't want to stand here any longer if I'm going to be the only witness to a murder.
"Really? And yet you knew I was at Slughorns party tonight?" Blaise answers back smartly to which Malfoy scowls.
"What are you doing out here?" Malfoy says with a sour expression as he comes to stand beside Blaise. He laughs in response. A deep unsettling laugh that even Malfoy looks confused at.
"I wanted to see something Malfoy and you proved I was right by showing up just now," Blaise admits, slapping Malfoy roughly on the shoulder.
"I'll see you back in the common room," Blaise says as he starts to make his way down the hallway. He stops halfway and turns around.
"Oh, and it was lovely to talk to you Granger," he says arrogantly. I just stare at him and smile awkwardly in return. When he finally rounds the corner, Malfoy moans out loud into his hand.
"What the hell are you doing Granger?" Malfoy shouts placing both his hands on the top of either side of my shoulders.
"What do you mean? I was just heading back to the common room when I noticed your weirdo friend was following me?" I shout back. How dare he give out to me for something his friend did.
"Why are you out wandering around the castle at night by yourself?" he asks.
"I wanted to go and study for my ancient ruins test," I admit sheepishly.
"And where the hell is Potter or weasel? Why didn't you ask them to walk you back?" He berates me.
"Because Malfoy I am seventeen years old. I don't need a chaperone to walk me everywhere!" I shout back. He sighs loudly running his hand through his hair.
"Why don't you tell your friend not to be following girls around at night like some sort of creep," I say beratingly. Malfoy sighs.
"It wasn't like that," Malfoy mumbles.
"Hmm?"
"I don't think he was following you for that reason. I think he was testing me," Malfoy admits, rubbing his temples. I watch as he lets his eyes close briefly, using his thumb to massage his pressure point above his cheekbone. The light coming in the windows makes his hair look almost white. He looks different with his eyes closed, younger. Such a strange act to do right now. It almost displays weakness and I can never imagine Malfoy allow himself to be in that kind of position in front of someone, let alone me.
"Zabini notices everything. It's like one of his things. So, he's noticed me watching you," he admits. I blush a little at this, still unsure how to take this kind of honesty and openness between us. Every time we speak now it is like the first time as it still surprises me so much that genuine words coming out of his mouth are directed at me.
"I think he followed you tonight to see would I show up," Malfoy says.
"Wait, were you following me too?" I ask, incredulously.
"No, I was watching the party and I noticed you weren't there anymore so I went looking for you," Malfoy admits.
"Why?" I ask. He looks away for a moment out over the bridge as the wind rips through it outside. I pull my jacket close around myself, regretting wearing a dress that has fabric so thin. Between the silence, I notice Malfoy briefly look at my dress and heat rises to my neck. I don't want to be under his scrutiny while I'm dressed like this.
But another thought enters my head. What must he think of me dressed like this when some of the best-looking girls in the school fawn over him? He might commend me for 'making an effort' at least. But I imagine not many women meet his expectations. What must be it be like to have a choice of anyone? Once they meet the correct criteria first.
"I don't have to answer that," Malfoy snaps.
"Fine," I snap back raising my hands. I turn around and pull open the door to the bridge. Immediately when I'm outside I regret it. I want to turn back and go the long way back to the dormitories but I hate to admit defeat in front of Malfoy. So, I push on and once I'm out on the actual bridge the wind moves through me like a train.
"Granger what are you doing? You're going to freeze to death out there," Malfoy shouts from behind me. I turn a little to see him jogging after me.
"Better than standing there arguing with you," I reply with my best Malfoy smirk. He notices and smirks back at me.
"So, you'd rather stand out here in the freezing cold and argue instead," Malfoy says motioning around him sarcastically.
"I'm saying that I don't want to argue with you at all when you refuse to answer any questions," I sigh.
"I don't have to answer your questions okay we have a deal, remember?" Malfoy explains.
"Malfoy!" I groan loudly as the cold rips through me. The dress is so thin it feels like I'm wrapped in clingfilm.
"What do you want from me?" I exclaim.
"What do you want from me?" He replies.
"I want to go back to before I ever won that stupid award and things felt normal," I admit, rubbing my arms up and down for warmth. Malfoy notices me and steps slightly in front of me blocking most of the wind. I step a little closer to him in an attempt to hide from it.
"You don't think that I want that Granger?" Malfoy exclaims angrily his fringe falling in front of his eyes as he looks down at me.
"I would love to go back to how things were before. Before things got messy and shit. Believe me, I don't want this as much as you do but things have changed now. We just have to deal with it," He says. He grabs my arm and pulls me across the bridge to the other side. I pull open the door and practically jump inside into the warm.
I run-up to the nearest candle and swirl my fingertips above it trying to get some of the warmth back into them. When I turn around Malfoy is looking at me again. In the halo of orange light coming from the candles, he doesn't look so scary or detrimental. This time I don't shy away from his grey eyes.
"I am scared of what you know," I admit, shocked even after the words find their way out.
"I am scared that this is all a joke to you. Some big ply to humiliate me in front of everyone and I don't know why you haven't done it already. I'm not sure why you're trying to drag it out and be friendly towards me. I don't understand why you're acting like this. I don't understand any of it Malfoy. Nothing!" I exclaim.
He weighs this up for a moment and half-smiles at me.
"You should be able to tell whether or not I'm being sincere, no?" Malfoy asks smugly.
"No? How could I possibly know that?" I ask. Malfoy smirks.
"I thought you said you could see through me so well?" he asks smirking one last time before he turns and heads down the hallway. I stand int he hallway rubbing the warmth back into my arms while I can't help feel like Malfoy won this argument and he knows it far too well.