-Sasuke-

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Sasuke is tired.

Honestly, Sasuke feels he's very justified in feeling done with everything. He probably should've just played dead that first day when Naruto tackled him. That psycho has dragged him through countless pranks, burned down an Uchiha training ground, terrified the whole village with his freaky Fuzzy chakra, and somehow made the fangirls worse. Sasuke almost wishes Naruto had stayed in that dumpster a year ago. The only real good spot is the sheer amount of talent and knowledge Naruto is somehow more than willing to dump on Sasuke the moment he asks. Was he that desperate for attention or something?

Whatever. The point is, Sasuke is tired of being dragged through life by a kid with no goal other than "create chaos". And if Sasuke wants to stop getting dragged around by the psycho, he's gotta get just as strong so Naruto can't corner him into going along with crazy schemes anymore. And one big thing Naruto has that Sasuke doesn't is a summoning contract.

So that's why we ended up here. With Sasuke hounding Itachi relentlessly for the cat contract. Which is kind of a flawed plan, since Itachi has the crow contract. Get it right. Second, Itachi keeps telling Sasuke that he'll have to wait until he's older. Something about taking his time maturing into a young man who can use it responsibly. Whatever. Naruto's progressing way faster than Sasuke so he can't take his time here!

Huh. Wasn't Sasuke just thinking about how Naruto's happy to help literally the second Sasuke asks for it? Maybe the problem is also the solution!

Sasuke abruptly stops hounding Itachi to go track down Naruto. Not an easy feat, but luckily Naruto's hanging out in his coffee shop. Sasuke isn't sure what exactly Naruto's doing; he's not even at the counter or baking anything! Actually, it looks like he's scribbling all over the donut boxes?

Sasuke peeked at a note... and leaned away, scowling.

"Idiot."

Naruto hummed absentmindedly (which made Sasuke want to claw off his ears. The idiot sounds like an old lady having a seizure while giving her best impression of a crying baby elephant), picking up another box.

"Stop ignoring me, idiot!"

Naruto glanced in Sasuke's direction, raised an eyebrow, and handed him a marker.

"What the heck?"

"If you're gonna sit there and hound me, at least be productive and help me add notes to the boxes. Can't have my customers being disappointed! They've got a competition for who gets the best note and everything! Actually, I think Anko's winning... maybe I should rig it next time."

"Forget that, idiot! Teach me summoning!"

"Huh? Doesn't your family do summoning? Why don't you ask them?"

Sasuke huffed.

"Itachi thinks I'm too young."

Naruto tilted his head. And dammit, he's starting to grin that stupid grin that promises trouble.

"Lucky for you, Fuzzy says we are above such plebeian concerns!"

"What?"

"Shut up and come with me."

And Naruto dragged Sasuke out the shop, with Sasuke cursing his own stupidity the whole time.

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To be honest, Sasuke didn't really expect Naruto to just tell him the hand signs and sit back to watch. Don't you need a contract first? Sasuke kind of figured Naruto would tell him how to get one, not just tell him the hand signs... did Naruto take what he said literally? Was he just teaching him summoning without actually helping him get a contract? Was Sasuke going to just make a fool of himself by making the signs and nothing happens? Whatever. He probably looked stupid just standing there and staring, so Sasuke sucked it up and tried the hand signs.

And the world dissolved into smoke.

Sasuke blinked. Is he on a cliff? Waaaaaay too high up for a kid who hasn't learned wall walking yet, but the more important thing was the area in front of him.

Treacherous terrain, with jutting cliffs and an endless bottom. Clear, open air in between the cliffs and little to no foliage to obstruct the sky. This would be a difficult environment for most animals to live. How the heck did Sasuke get here?

Although, he kind of dropped that question once he noticed the giant hawks eyeing him from a cliff above him. Huh. That's probably concerning.

One dove down to grab him.

Yeah, Sasuke should probably run.

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How the heck Sasuke ended up with a summoning contract, he's not really sure. But hawks? Awesome. Let's see the psycho's foxes top this! And Itachi can take his maturity and stuff it up his-

Sorry, nii-chan.

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-Itachi-

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Itachi probably should've predicted this.

Yeah, in hindsight, he really should've tried to cut this off somehow. There was absolutely no way Sasuke wouldn't take advantage of Naruto's total willingness to share literally everything he knows. And now Itachi's very silly little brother has hawks at his beck and call.

Itachi loves his brother, but why?

Itachi's just going to let his dad deal with this. Let him do the parenting for once.

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-Naruto-

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This is priceless. Naruto doesn't even need his cool emotion sensing powers to see Sasuke's dad visibly struggle with what the heck he's supposed to think! Fugaku shifts from confused to proud to worried to kind of annoyed to resigned to every other emotion Naruto can think of, and Sasuke is just radiating uncomfortable so hard Naruto would probably be able to sense it from the other side of the village!

Fugaku clearly isn't even sure what he's supposed to do with Naruto. He was (sneakily) stalking Sasuke and waiting for the burst of confusion from Fugaku to signal the great news and immediately invited himself in to watch the drama unfold. Just sitting and watching Fugaku floundering and Sasuke being supremely uncomfortable had Fuzzy howling all nine of his tails off in laughter!

In the end, Fugaku kind of just sidestepped the issue to get out of the weird atmosphere. (Never mind that Fugaku was the main source of said weird atmosphere.) Sasuke got his fancy new summons, Naruto and Kurama got their chaos hit for the day, Itachi finally tried to dump some actual parental responsibility on Fugaku, and Mikoto somehow avoided all the chaos.

Shisui demanded a recreation of the atmosphere when he heard the story the next day. Naruto gladly dragged both Fugaku and Sasuke to re-enact it in excruciatingly accurate detail.

And the next week, Naruto dragged Sasuke off to another prank because he is above such plebeian concerns.