Chapter 47: Fallout
Hanako, Shinrai's mother, walked down the hall towards Shinrai's room and quietly opened the door. Curled up on the far too small bed was the lanky form of her son's best friend, Yasui. Hanako never really knew how best to describe the unusual looking boy. He was almost a perfect blend of fox and wolf characteristics. Too broad and tall for a fox, but with the distinctive markings of one.
Yasui didn't stir as she walked in and set a plate with a sandwich on it and a cup of water on the nearby nightstand. Shinrai's room was cluttered with video games and manga as usual, but she'd had to clear it out a bit to house Yasui there. Originally she'd put him on the couch, but he was a bit too large to fit on it comfortably. At least Shinrai's bed was wide enough that he wasn't hanging off of it.
"How are you feeling, Yasui?"
The hybrid sighed and glanced miserably up at her.
"I'm fine, I guess."
"I made you some lunch, dear. If you're hungry. Have you gotten any news yet about… anything?"
Yasui shook his head. Yesterday he'd been suspended from Cherryton for fighting a student. Hanako didn't know all the details directly, but what she'd been able to gather was that Yasui had been trying to put a stop to some bullying and accidentally went too far. Now he was nervously waiting to find out if he'd be returning to school or being expelled. Needless to say, he wasn't coping well.
Hanako waited for a moment longer before gently closing the door. While normally she would have been a bit uncomfortable having a carnivore well over three times her size in her home, Yasui was a special case. Hanako still remembered that feeling well when she'd heard about her son being attacked and the subsequent trip to the hospital. She had feared Shinrai was hurt, but it had then been revealed that Yasui had sacrificed himself to protect her son and his friends. It didn't matter what species you were, a mother never forgot something like that.
Hanako sighed as she took a seat in the living room. Hopefully by dinner time he'd be a bit better.
(After classes, Cherryton.)
Jack strained as he attempted to pull his pants up. He had just bought these and had been sure they fit perfectly. Maybe they had shrunk in the wash, because now he couldn't pull them up over his rear. Jack gulped and looked sideways at himself in the mirror. Either his pants had shrunk, or his butt had gotten bigger. His roommates would tease him to no end if it was the latter.
Jack shimmied and managed to pull his pants up just as the door opened. Jack smiled and said hello as Collot walked in with Voss on his shoulder. The big sheepdog shook his head and frowned.
"Did you hear the news?"
"What one? About someone getting thrown out for fighting?"
Collot nodded, and Jack shrugged.
"I doubt I've heard what actually happened. So far I've heard that one guy physically tore the heads off of five other students, and that a middle schooler is currently in a coma after getting beaten so bad he broke every bone in his body."
Collot crossed his arms.
"Well I don't know the whole story, but I know who it is."
"Oh? Who?"
"Yasui."
Jack turned to stare incredulously at his roommate.
"Yasui?! No way, the guy's a big softy."
Collot shrugged.
"I dunno what happened, but he's been suspended for fighting."
Jack frowned, looking down at the floor as he thought.
"That makes no sense. He's one of the most harmless people I've ever met. I mean, his best friend is a squirrel and he works at a cafe! He's as far from violent as they come!"
Collot patted Jack on the shoulder as he walked to his own bunk.
"We all have a breaking point. Apparently he hit his."
Jack stuffed his phone into his pocket and tugged on a shirt and coat.
"I'm going to go find one of his friends. Either Shinrai or a member of his club. I'll let you know what I find out."
Collot gave him a thumbs up and a sympathetic smile.
"Let me know what you find out. I'll let anyone who asks know where you are."
Jack nodded. He knew Collot meant Legoshi. The wolf was supposed to not be having to spend as long at Drama Club today. Apparently he just needed to adjust the lights to a certain position and then he was done. With determination giving him steel in his spine, Jack hustled out of the dorm and began his search.
His first attempt, finding Shinrai, ended up being unsuccessful. He looked high and low for the squirrel but couldn't find him anywhere. Finally, Jack gave up on Shinrai and settled for searching for the members of the Cooking Club. His first instinct was to check the club room, which yielded far better results than his attempts to find Shinrai. Jack opened the door to the club room and saw a tiger, snake, polar bear, and kangaroo sitting around a table dejectedly.
"Oh… hello." The tigress said with a sigh. "Sorry, we're not making anything today. If you're looking for food you'll need to use a vending machine."
Jack shook his head and fully entered the room.
"I'm not here for food. I'm a friend of Yasui, and was wondering what happened to him. I heard he got suspended, but there's no way he'd go and do something like that."
The snake looked down with a miserable expression. It had a massive bruise across its snout, and seemed generally despondent.
"It'sssss all my fault." The snake hissed. "Yassssui wasss ssstanding up for me after sssome boyssss were picking on me. One of them threw ssssomething that hit me, and Yasssui went bersssserk."
Jack crossed his arms, taken aback. He had truly believed that there had been something else that had happened to Yasui rather than him fighting. Now he didn't know what to think. Jack looked at the other members of the Cooking Club and his ears drooped.
"So… what are you all planning on doing now?"
The tigress shrugged.
"We don't know. Yasui was the one who ran our meetings. If he ends up… you know, getting kicked out, then we probably won't do much of anything anymore. None of us really want to take his place."
Jack tried to smile encouragingly, but it ended up looking more like a grimace.
"Hey, there's still time. Before they expel a student the board has to meet and vote on it. So there's still hope."
The snake rested its head on the table.
"If Yassssui getsss expelled, I don't think I'll end up sssstaying here. I'll probably end up transsssferring to a ssssmall private sssschool for ssssnakes."
The polar bear looked down with concern.
"Really, Chaussette? Why?"
The snake looked away.
"My parentssss were reluctant to have me here anyway, but I wanted to give it a try. Until Yassssui became my friend I wassss missserable here. Nobody would talk to me, I got teassssed consssstantly, and there aren't many resssourcess for ssssnakess here."
Jack furrowed his brow. Now that he thought about it, he'd never really seen many snake students in any school he ever went to. But there was a decent sized population of snakes in the city. Now it made sense that they went to snake-only schools where their unique needs could be met.
Unable to take the oppressive atmosphere of gloom and doom in the Cooking Club room anymore, Jack said goodbye and left. As he walked nowhere in particular, he was pleased to notice Legoshi walking towards him.
"Hey, Jack." Legoshi said in his usual manner. Jack halfheartedly returned the greeting and joined the wolf as he walked wherever he was going. Noticing Jack's mood, Legoshi bent down a little.
"Are you feeling okay?"
"I'm okay." Jack sighed. "Just a little upset. Have you heard what happened with Yasui?"
Legoshi scratched his head.
"I've heard rumors. Most seem a little exaggerated, like him tearing a guy's face off or putting six students in the hospital after flying into a mutant hybrid rage."
"He got suspended for fighting. Apparently a member of his club was being bullied and he got violent with the bullies. I hope they don't suspend him. It doesn't seem fair!"
Legoshi rubbed his elbow and sighed in his usual gloomy manner.
"Well, it does make sense. Even if you're standing up to a bully, the school can't allow students to harm each other without consequences. It's just how it works."
"I know, but it doesn't seem right."
Legoshi patted Jack on the shoulder.
"Well, hopefully it'll turn out okay. Want me to get us some drinks to make you feel better?"
Jack shrugged.
"Well… okay. But it just sucks that there's nothing anyone can do to help him!"
(Across the city at Diana's house.)
Miss Diana sat primly with one leg crossed over the other as the person in front of her, a male fox in his late twenties named Gyobe, began meticulously setting out a notepad and pen. Gyobe had first come to work for Miss Diana as soon as he graduated from law school. He had been described as pedantic, obsessive, borderline sociopathic, and utterly devoid of empathy and emotion by his teachers when Diana performed her usual research on potential hires. She'd hired him as her personal favorite lawyer on the spot.
"Good afternoon, Gyobe. How are you doing?"
"Fine." The fox said with a slight bow of his head. He was a slim yet short guy, with thin rectangular glasses and vibrant red fur. Diana internally smiled. One thing she loved about Gyobe was how blunt he was. If he could avoid talking to you, he would. Miss Diana didn't like chatty lawyers.
"I'm sure you're aware that I have a new case for you. My heir is being investigated for fighting at his school. He is currently on suspension with expulsion pending a hearing by the school board. I want you to make his defense."
Gyobe began scratching some notes.
"I see. How badly do you want this done?"
"Do whatever you want, I give you free reign."
Gyobe looked over his glasses at Diana with questioning expression. She smiled sweetly and nodded.
"Exactly. I want you to go for the throat."
Gyobe nodded without looking away from his notes.
"I need the full account of the incident."
"Essentially, Yasui saw two male students bullying a female underclassman of his. He intervened, things got violent, and Yasui ended up breaking the bully's jaw."
"I see." Gyobe scribbled frantically. "Who struck first?"
Diana folded her hands and huffed.
"I wasn't able to find that out. Details are still a bit uncertain due to lack of witnesses. Your best bet would be to interview the victim of the bullying, a female snake named Chaussette."
Gyobe nodded again and clicked his pen.
"Anything else?"
Diana tapped her lips thoughtfully before nodding to herself.
"Yes, actually. Slight amendment to my earlier statement. Do try not to burn any bridges for Yasui."
"Understood, Miss Diana." Gyobe said curtly before standing and gathering his belongings. As he left, Charles raised an eyebrow.
"I still don't understand why you like that particular lawyer so much. He's not even that good at his job, I've never seen him do anything that impressive."
Diana smoothed her clothes as she stood, preparing to continue with her day.
"His manners and social skills might be atrocious, but he's absolutely ruthless and completely dogged when it comes to finding out any useful information. He'll dig into any corner, find any dirt, and break as many rules as he needs to get the job done. Gyobe is exactly who we need."
Charles shrugged as Diana walked past him into the kitchen. As the leopard made herself a cup of tea, Charles crossed his arms and watched her.
"Is there any reason you haven't hounded Yasui into staying here while he's suspended?"
"I'm giving him some space, Charles." Diana retorted. "Things were weird for a while between us, and we've only just patched them up. I'll let him set the pace for us to spend time together for now, to make sure he's comfortable. But I'll make sure to let him know we're here for him if he wants us."
Charles rubbed a hand across his scalp.
"I hope he's doing okay. He doesn't seem the type of person to handle something like this well."
Diana waved Charles off with a roll of her eyes.
"Yasui is a big boy. He'll be fine."
(Shinrai's house)
The door to Shinrai's room opened and Mrs. Hanako walked in determinedly clutching a broom. She walked over to where Yasui was still curled up and placed her fists on her hips.
"That's it, Yasui. You've been in here rotting long enough. I know you're supposed to work on Thursdays, and you need to get out of the house for a bit. You're going to work, and you're going right now!"
Yasui looked vacantly towards her.
"I don't think I can handle going to work today. I'm too upset."
"Well staying here and wallowing in your own self pity isn't making it any better. Move!" She punctuated her last word with a poke from her broom. Yasui frowned as the tiny female prodded him with a broom handled in the ribs. Finally, he let himself be forced out of bed and set to work getting himself presentable again. It was hard to work up the motivation to do anything given the massive boulder of dread sitting in the bottom of his stomach, but Mrs. Hanako was very insistent that he go to work. Grumbling the whole way, Yasui slouched out the door to the apartment and towards the train station.
At Cafe Lapin, Yasui put on his apron as usual before moving to work at the front counter. Usually he was more than happy to smile and make small chit chat with the customers, but his heart wasn't in it today. Yasui couldn't even make himself smile as the first hour of his shift came and went. Mimi, who was taking Marco's shift this week because she needed extra money for rent, raised an eyebrow at Yasui.
"Are you always this mopey on Thursdays?"
Yasui leaned against the counter and hung his head.
"No…. I got suspended from school."
Mimi nodded with a smirk.
"First time?"
"Yeah. For years I've never gotten into any trouble at school. Well, trouble that I caused I mean. But within the span of three weeks I got put on probation, suspended, and the school board is going to hold a hearing to possibly expel me. I feel horrible!"
Mimi rolled her eyes and adjusted her spiked choker. The goth rabbit didn't seem disturbed at all.
"Oh please, I doubt they'll expell you. I've been suspended loads of times for all sorts of crap. Smoking, skipping class, skipping class to make out with a guy, and all sorts of worse things. So far, never actually expelled. What'd you do?"
"I broke someone's jaw when I beat the crap out of them." Yasui groaned. Mimi snorted.
"Damn. I never thought a wuss like you would do something like that. What happened, did they forget to say 'thank you' to the cafeteria workers?"
"They were bullying a friend of mine, and I sort of lost it. I didn't mean to hurt that guy, really. I just… I still forget how much stronger I've gotten ever since my growth spurt."
Mimi shifted slightly and looked intently at Yasui.
"So, like, how bad did you hurt the guy? Apart from the broken jaw?"
"Pretty bad. They had to call an ambulance and everything. I almost got arrested, but the headmaster intervened because of the odd circumstances around it. Something about me being a minor and also some other law or other I don't quite understand."
Mimi bit her lip.
"But like, tell me about the fight. In detail."
Yasui frowned and looked down at the small herbivore.
"Why do you want to hear about it? It was horrible, absolutely horrible. Just… I'll never forget that awful noise when I hit him in the face the last time."
"Was there blood? Like, how gruesome are we talking?"
Yasui shuddered and dry washed his hands.
"Yeah, and it almost made me sick. I still feel like there's blood on my hands sometimes, no matter how often I wash them. The worst part was the feeling of his jaw breaking. It was like a nightmare."
Mimi shivered as Yasui said that.
"I bet you looked terrifying, standing over that guy with blood all over you. All primal and strong and… mmph."
Yasui gulped and closed his eyes.
"Mimi, you're making me feel worse. I probably did look like a monster standing there with that guy's blood and teeth on the floor. I bet everyone at school is terrified of me now. And who can blame them, I acted like a monster. I deserve it."
Mimi had a strange expression on her face as she moved closer to Yasui. Well, any expression on the usually annoyed looking rabbit was odd, but she looked extremely odd now. Her eyes were heavy lidded and she was biting her lip while staring intently at Yasui.
"Were you baring your fangs? Like, fully raging out?"
"I don't know! Please stop asking me— wait, what's wrong with your face?"
Mimi looked around to make sure the cafe was currently empty before stepping a bit closer to Yasui.
"Think you could… show me that? Your primal, feral side?"
"What!? No way! What part of me being devastated by what happened makes you think I want to relive it!"
Mimi sidled closer, looking up at Yasui.
"Don't you hold out on me! I didn't think you had a dark side, but now that I know you do… I want to see it."
"But why!?"
Mimi licked her pitch black lipstick covered lips.
"Because the thought of you all worked up, going absolutely feral… is actually kinda hot. Little Mister Nice Guy giving way to The Big, Bad Wolf."
Yasui slid back a bit, giving Mimi a concerned look.
"Mimi, you're scaring me."
"Why are you scared? You're the big, powerful carnivore. Gosh, you usually act like such a delicate little puppy I can barely imagine what you going feral is like."
Yasui gulped and scooted away further. Mimi just shrugged.
"Fine, be that way. I think you'd do better if you got more in touch with your wild side."
Yasui turned away as Mimi went back to her area by the coffee makers. That rabbit was crazy. Well, Yasui already knew she was a bit out there, but this took the cake. She thought him going nuts and hurting someone was hot? What was wrong with her?!
(I swear, are all women absolutely insane? Geez, the only female I know who isn't an absolute rollercoaster of emotions is Chaussette.)
The thought of Chaussette made Yasui's ears droop. He hoped she was doing okay. He hadn't gotten a chance to check on her after he was suspended. Hopefully she would let him know if she needed anything.
Yasui was disappointed that Ten never showed up. She usually only came to the cafe on Tuesdays, but he wanted to talk to her now more than ever. She was worldly-wise and knew lots about breaking the law. Most likely she could let Yasui know what would end up happening to him. Plus, she was fun to talk to. Sure she scared Yasui a bit, but he could tell that deep down she actually was a good person.
Even as Yasui left and returned to Shinrai's home, that gnawing anxiety was still worming around in his chest. He was just plain terrified that he'd be expelled, and couldn't stop thinking about what would happen if he was. It was making his dark mood even worse, but he was also trying hard not to get upset or angry again. Because what if he flew off the handle again? What if he accidentally hurt Mrs. Hanako or someone else while he was angry? He wouldn't be able to live with himself if he did that.
Friday felt much the same as Thursday to Yasui as he anxiously waited for any news of his fate. The hours crawled by like a snail with no news forthcoming. Back on school grounds, Shinrai wasn't feeling any better. He was with Hikaru in the unused storage room over the auditorium that had become their go to hangout spot, and he was not happy.
"They can't actually expel him, can they?" Shinrai said with a groan. He was currently pacing back and forth in front of the beanbag where Hikaru was seated. Hikaru shrugged.
"I mean, he did really mess up a guy. True the jerk deserved it, but still. I don't know what the school will do. Especially because it wasn't really an accident. They were fighting and things went too far."
Shinrai glowered at the fennec fox.
"You're not making me feel any better."
Hikaru rolled her eyes.
"And you pacing around like a nutcase isn't helping either of us. Seriously, dude, try to calm down."
"How can I calm down when my best friend is in massive trouble?! I'm freaking out because I can't do anything! I finally got a best friend and he might get kicked out of school! How am I supposed to calm down?!"
Hikaru watched him with a deadpan look before finally huffing.
"Maybe you should do something to take your mind off it. We could play a game or watch something. I heard about a cool new anime we could try."
"I can't just go about like normal playing games and whatever during this! I'll just feel anxious the whole time!"
Hikaru looked down before seeming to notice something. She looked back up at the squirrel with a bored expression.
"Wanna touch my boobs?"
Shinrai froze. He slowly turned towards her with a shocked look on his face. Hikaru shrugged.
"What. Everyone likes boobs. I don't really care if you touch mine. You're the only person who's never made a stupid comment about these dumb monsters I have to lug around."
Shinrai licked his lips and looked at the girl sitting boredly on the beanbag. She did such a good job of hiding them, he sometimes forgot that she had some rather massive… bosoms. He still didn't understand why she used to get bullied because of them. In his mind, there was nothing wrong with having large… assets. And he had secretly always wanted to touch them.
"Well… if you don't mind…."
Hikaru snorted with laughter.
"Heh, perv! I knew you'd be all over that, you shameless horn-dog. Guess you can't be that worried, can you?"
Shinrai glowered at her before sulkily sitting as far away from her as possible.
"Oh haha. I'm dying laughing, Hikaru."
"I never said you couldn't touch them though."
Shinrai turned to her and frowned.
"Hikaru, I'm not really in the mood for—"
Shinrai stopped talking and his eyes went as wide as saucers as Hikaru lifted her hoodie and the shirt below. She was still wearing a compression sports bra like usual, but even with that her chest was truly massive. Hikaru cackled with mirth.
"I heard it was deer who froze when they got flashed, guess it works on squirrels too. Gosh, you're such a dork."
She dropped her clothes back down and elbowed Shinrai.
"Dude, you should see your face! It's priceless!"
Shinrai's gaze flickered up to Hikaru's face. It was so weird, but Shinrai suddenly had an epiphany. He'd often thought about how if he had to date someone, it'd be a girl like Hikaru. Someone with common interests who he actually enjoyed spending time with. But… Hikaru was a girl. And honestly, she was kinda cute. Her big ears were adorable, she had a cute little tail and pretty eyes, and her body was positively drool-worthy when she wasn't hiding it.
(Oh gosh, no. Do I have a thing for Hikaru?!)
Shinrai bit his lip and his eyes widened even further. He was hanging out with a girl, one on one. Alone, in an empty room. They were so close they were practically touching. She was a girl. How had he never actually realized that Hikaru was a girl?! Like, a girl girl!
"Dude, earth to Shinrai. Hello!" Hikaru snapped her fingers in front of Shinrai before snickering.
"Geez, I broke him. Guess your brain couldn't handle it, Shinrai."
Shinrai was still frozen as he tried to think of what to do. He was staring the fact that he liked Hikaru a bit more than just as a friend dead in the face. What was he supposed to do in this situation? What did he do?
(Okay! Stop panicking! I just have to go with my gut so my brain has time to reboot. Just play it cool and don't think.)
Shinrai blinked rapidly before shifting a bit. Hikaru grinned.
"Finally awake again or—hmmph!"
Shinrai's eyes went wide again as he realized what he was doing. He had leaned forward and kissed Hikaru on the lips. And he still was. Why was he kissing her?
(W-what just happened!? Why did I kiss her? This isn't what I meant when I decided to follow my gut! Gosh, her lips are soft. I can feel her sharp teeth a little. Her mouth tastes like sour cherry candy. Wait, I'm still kissing her!)
This time it was Hikaru whose eyes were as wide as saucers. Shinrai slowly pulled away with his face burning. Hikaru just stared at him in shock. Shinrai felt like he was going to throw up. He had ruined everything by doing that! Now she was going to hate him! Why had he kissed her!? Just because his uncle and sister were in cross species relationships didn't mean everyone wanted one! Hikaru was probably going to slap him across the face for that.
Shinrai stood. He was going to run away now. He couldn't look Hikaru in the eye after such a humiliating moment. She probably felt so uncomfortable and grossed out. Things would never be the same again between them. Why did he have to go and mess with a good thing?!
"S-Shinrai?!"
The squirrel felt his stomach drop at her incredulous tone. This wasn't going to end well. Shinrai scooted away.
"I'm sorry! I'm so sorry! I don't know what happened I just… I'm so sorry!"
"Shinrai… you kissed me."
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to!" The squirrel quickly said. Hikaru glared at him, standing up and scowling.
"That's not funny, Shinrai. That's really not funny."
"I didn't… I wasn't trying to be!"
Hikaru crossed her arms.
"Oh yeah? Then what were you trying to do? Why did you kiss me?"
Shinrai clutched his head and groaned.
"I don't know! I was just thinking about how you're a girl, and you're super cool to hang out with and how much I like you. And then I sort of realized that you're actually a girl, and like, you're cute and pretty and everything. And it sort of just happened! I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to make things weird!"
Hikaru looked down as Shinrai squirmed uncomfortably. After a brief pause, Hikaru spoke quietly.
"You… think I'm pretty?"
"Well… yeah." Shinrai said with a frown. "Why do you ask?"
Hikaru rubbed her elbow through her baggy sweatshirt.
"Nobody's ever called me pretty before."
"Seriously?"
The fennec fox shrugged uncomfortably and sat back down a bit away from Shinrai.
"Like I said, I got bullied a lot because of how… weird I looked as a kid. I mean, can you imagine how uncomfortable people felt around a little girl with developed bosoms? I always feel ugly and like I'm a freak. I don't wear makeup or pretty clothes, and I'm not bubbly and girly like other people my age."
Shinrai moved a little closer.
"But I like that about you, Hikaru! I like playing games with you and making crude jokes. I like that you don't make me feel awkward and nervous like other girls."
"So you don't think of me like a girl. More like a boy."
Shinrai laughed and shook his head.
"Trust me, I don't think about boys the same way I think about you. I think you're really pretty, even if I'm not supposed to. I know, I'm a squirrel and you're a fox. I shouldn't have feelings for you."
Hikaru gestured to herself, plucking at her ragged hoodie and baggy jeans.
"What about this is attractive?"
Shinrai blushed and began to pick at his fingers. How was he supposed to say this? How could he avoid looking like a dork while telling her the truth? It was probably best to be brief.
"I… think you have pretty eyes. They're sparkly. And your ears are so cute, I just want to rub them. And you have such a cute little tail and soft, fluffy fur. Your laugh makes me laugh, and you totally get me. And your body is just so… gah, I just want to touch you and hug you and…."
Shinrai stopped himself with a cough. Reaching for a new topic, he laughed bitterly.
"Guess I inherited the family curse. So many of my family members end up attracted to non-squirrels. My uncle is married to a snake, my sister is dating a stoat, and my great aunt was in a relationship with a penguin before they legalized interspecies marriages. I guess you were right back a few months ago, I have a thing for foxes. Gosh, I'm a weirdo."
Shinrai looked down at his legs in embarrassment. He'd definitely screwed this up. There was no way him babbling like that was going to do anything but make her think poorly about him. Shinrai flinched as Hikaru laid her hand on his.
"You really feel that way? About me, that is?"
"Uh… I think so. I hadn't really thought about it until now, and it was sort of random like 'hey, she's exactly how I'd want a girlfriend to be. Wait, she's a girl, so couldn't she be my girlfriend?' And then I sort of panicked and… yeah."
Hikaru's already heated face grew hotter as she hunched into her hoodie a bit more.
"You… you want me to be your girlfriend?"
"No! Uh, wait, yes? Maybe? If you want to? I don't know!" Shinrai said as he tugged on his ears. This was way too complicated. He didn't know anything about girls! He'd never even really had the nerve to speak to a girl, let alone ask one out. Shinrai's insides felt like they were in a blender. He was all jumbled up and jittery, like he'd just drank three energy drinks chased by a plate of donuts.
Hikaru sat in silence for a while, staring intently at her claws. Shinrai sat ready to jump at a moment's notice. He didn't know what else to do. He hadn't exactly planned or meant for this to happen. Did he want Hikaru to be his girlfriend? She was definitely cute, but what would his parents say! Or her parents! Or everyone else for that matter! And then the question was if she liked him at all. Shinrai was aware he wasn't exactly the most handsome guy around. And the fact he put no effort into his appearance definitely didn't help. While he waited for a clue as to what he needed to do next, Shinrai began subtly trying to remove some tangles from his tail.
After a few minutes, Hikaru cleared her throat. Shinrai held his breath, out of anticipation or fear he wasn't sure, while Hikaru hesitantly began speaking.
"I guess… I wouldn't mind having a boyfriend. Uh, that means you. Like, if you want to."
"Uh… sure? I mean, what's the harm in giving it a shot?"
Hikaru looked up and eagerly nodded.
"Exactly! It's nothing serious, just… trying it out. Seeing if we like it."
Shinrai leaned in a bit as he nodded as well.
"Totally! And if we don't, no problem! We just decided to stop being… you know."
"Yeah! No commitment. Just casual. Totally casual. No need to get too worked up about it."
Both Shinrai and Hikaru sat awkwardly staring at each other. Shinrai didn't know what to do, or what to feel. He technically had a girlfriend now. But what was he supposed to do? Did he ask her to go to dinner with him? They already did that. So what exactly did he need to do?
"So… I guess we can play something?" Hikaru finally said.
"I'm fine with that." Shinrai chimed in. Hikaru turned towards the little tv that had been left up in the storage room and began perusing the games she had stored here. After a second, she glanced back at Shinrai.
"Or… we could… uh… make out?"
"Oh? Oh! Like kiss! Uh, sure? If you want to."
"I mean we might as well since we're… boyfriend-girlfriend."
Hikaru awkwardly sat back down on the beanbag and watched Shinrai expectantly. The squirrel nervously scooted over to her and licked his lips. Was there some sort of… technique to this he needed to use? He couldn't remember what he'd done when he'd kissed her a bit ago. That had been good, so he should do it again. Just… lean in and do what feels natural.
As Shinrai leaned forward and puckered his lips, Hikaru did the same. What followed was definitely much weirder and more awkward than their first kiss. Hikaru decided that maybe she was trying too hard and relaxed her lips a bit, opening her slightly. When Shinrai cluelessly pushed ahead, Hikaru jumped a bit. Shinrai squealed and pulled back, holding his mouth.
"Ah! You bit me!"
"Sorry! I'm so so sorry! I didn't mean to!"
Shinrai pulled his hands away and looked at them in concern.
"Am I bleeding?"
Hikaru leaned in and looked at his lip. She shook her head.
"I don't see anything. It's not like I bit down or anything. I think your lips just scraped my teeth when you practically pushed your whole mouth into mine."
"Sorry, I wasn't expecting you to open your mouth. Am I pursing my lips too hard? I feel like I'm pursing my lips too hard."
Hikaru held up her index finger and thumb with a little space between.
"Maybe a little. That's why I relaxed my mouth a bit."
Shinrai rubbed his mouth and smiled sheepishly.
"Do you want to try again, or…."
"Maybe we should try again later. We can just… hang out."
Shinrai nodded. Internally, he let out a sigh of relief. He'd need to figure out how to actually kiss well before he tried again. Hopefully there were guides on the internet or something. Even still, he sat a little closer than usual to Hikaru as they played some video games. But it was unfortunately clear that things were definitely a little awkward now.
After dinner, Shinrai decided to go on a short walk so he could think. Now he was torn between concern for Yasui, and his apprehensions about his already uncomfortable romantic relationship with Hikaru. How could things be going poorly after you'd only been dating for a few hours?
Shinrai jolted and looked around as he realized someone was calling his name.
"Shinrai. Wake up, Shinrai!"
Shinrai turned his head and saw his sister, Hana, strolling hand in hand with her boyfriend, Robby the stoat. From what Shinrai had seen, they were still going steady. Hana rolled her eyes.
"Geez, I've been trying to get your attention for over a minute now. How are you doing?"
"Oh, I'm fine." Shinrai laimly lied. Hana raised an eyebrow in a stunningly accurate impression of their mother.
"You don't seem fine. You seem like a zombie."
Shinrai shrugged.
"I just have a lot on my mind."
"Are you worried about Yasui?"
Shinrai nodded.
"Yeah, there's that."
Robby rubbed his nose with a clawed finger.
"Uh-oh, is there something else? I smell girl trouble."
Hana sniffed and smiled at her boyfriend.
"Oh please, Shinrai can't talk to girls."
Shinrai frowned at his sister. That was pretty rude of her to say. Accurate, but rude.
"Actually, I have a lot on my mind because I have a girlfriend now."
Robby nodded knowledge while Hana narrowed her eyes suspiciously.
"Oh really. What's her name?"
"Uh… Hikaru."
Hana's eyes widened.
"Wait, the same Hikaru who you brought over around Rexmas?"
Shinrai nodded. Hana gawked at him in disbelief while Robby rubbed her shoulder in a smug sort of way.
"I told you." The stoat gloated. "I knew there was something between them."
Hana playfully smacked Robby's arm. Shinrai huffed.
"Well then you figured it out before I did. I only just learned that this afternoon."
Hana gave her little brother an expectant look.
"Well go on! What happened! How did you find out you had feelings for her?"
Shinrai scratched his chin and shrugged.
"Well, we were hanging out and goofing off like usual. Then suddenly I realized she was a girl, and like… a girl girl. You know, the type that people date. And then I was like 'honestly if I had to date someone I'd want them to be like Hikaru.' But then I was all 'wait a minute, Hikaru is a girl who I could date.' And then I sort of panicked and kissed her."
Hana glowered at him while Robby hid a smirk behind a fake cough.
"Seriously? That's it?" Hana said, unamused. Shinrai nodded, and his sister shook her head.
"Only you could ask someone out in such a spectacularly terrible fashion."
"Well it worked, didn't it? Cut me some slack!"
Robby lowered his hand and grinned at Shinrai.
"So what's your next move? Gonna take her out on a date? Or just jump right to getting married?"
Shinrai gave his sister and her boyfriend sour looks.
"Oh haha. Listen, what I did worked so you can just shove it."
Hana smirked and looped her arm through Robby's.
"Well I'm sure Mom will be thrilled that you're dating a fox. It's practically a family tradition at this point."
Robby chose then to interject.
"Speaking of foxes, how's your friend doing? Hana told me he got suspended."
Shinrai sighed.
"I don't know. Apparently he spends most of the day in bed. Hopefully he can snap out of it. I dunno, maybe he needs to go see someone to help him work through this stuff. But who?"
(In a different part of the city.)
"Kid, you might be the most annoying person I've ever met."
Yasui sheepishly looked up at Dr. Gouhin from the doorway of the clinic. The buff panda just gave him an exasperated look before grunting and walking back into the clinic. Yasui hesitated by the door.
"Well get your scrawny ass in here and close the door! You're letting the warm air out!"
Yasui jumped to it and entered the clinic. He made his way to where Gouhin was brewing a pot of his rather unpleasant bamboo tea and stood by the table.
"I'm really sorry to bug you, Dr. Gouhin. I just… needed to talk to someone about some psychiatric problems."
Gouhin lit a cigarette and pointed accusingly at Yasui.
"Let me guess, same crap you were whining about before. 'I'm impulsive! I'm moody! I'm horny and I don't like it!' You're a damn broken record and a classic hypochondriac."
Yasui tentatively took a seat and rubbed his thumb along the back of his hand.
"No, it's not any of those. I… I hurt someone. And like, really seriously. They had to go to the emergency room."
Gouhin was suddenly serious. He sat forward, staring at Yasui intently.
"What happened?"
Yasui took a deep breath and recounted the entire incident. Gouhin didn't speak a word the entire time. Finally, Yasui was finished and looked pleadingly up at Gouhin.
"Gouhin, I'm scared. I completely lost it and could have killed him. What if it happens again? I know I'm more unstable because I'm a hybrid, so does that mean that this could happen more frequently? What if I hurt somebody I care about? Like Shinrai or his family? Or my own family?"
Gouhin let out a long breath before taking a drag of his cigarette. He flicked the ash from the end and rested his elbows on the table.
"You're already taking all the right steps. You're exercising regularly and maintaining a good diet, not to mention forming positive relationships with others. Sometimes things like this happen, it's instinct."
"So that's it? Just… hope for the best? Try not to go berserk and kill those around you? That's all you can do for me?!"
"That's it."
Yasui leapt to his feet, his chair slamming to the floor. He jabbed a finger at Gouhin.
"You're supposed to help people! How can you not have anything you can do! I can't live like this anymore! It was bad enough when I was just upset about being a hybrid and all my new feelings, but now I'm terrified of myself! I don't want to eat, I don't want to sleep, I don't want to be around anyone else! I'm scared every minute of every day that I've ruined my life and that society is right to fear me! I'm scared to keep living, and I- I keep thinking about how- how maybe I should just… just…."
Yasui looked down in shame. It was too painful to say. He didn't want to voice those dark thoughts he'd had during the hopeless nights after what happened. Everyone thought he was upset about getting suspended, or even for hurting that other student. They didn't get it. They hadn't felt what it had been like to completely lose control.
Yasui was surprised when he felt something solid and warm wrap around him. He leaned his head forward onto Gouhin's stomach as the doctor hugged him gently. It was so… unexpected from the usually gruff doctor. No calling him a punk or boisterously threatening him. Gouhin didn't even speak until he patted Yasui on the back and released him.
"Don't give up, Yasui. You have a lot to live for."
Yasui took off his glasses and wiped his eyes.
"I know. And I'm sorry for freaking out. It's just… this has all been eating away at me and I don't know if anyone can even understand it. You were the only one who I thought might be able to help me."
Gouhin sat back down and poured the tea into two cups. He gently slid one towards Yasui who took it gratefully. It might not taste good, but it was warm and comforting to hold.
"I'm sorry, kid. There's no magic pill that turns your instincts off. All that you can do is master self control. That's why I tell all my patients to begin strict exercise routines and diets. It's less about the physical aspects and more about the mental. Sticking with your exercises and diet builds self control and helps you practice restraint in small areas. Maybe you skip that slice of cake you want, or go for a jog when you don't want to. Every little bit helps you master your impulses and baser instincts."
"But, if I have these instincts and impulses, do they make me a bad person?"
Gouhin rested a large hand on Yasui's shoulder and gave him a rare smile.
"Yasui, you're a real pain in my ass. But you're a good kid. If there's one patient of mine I'm not worried about, it's you. You have the humility to know when you can't handle something on your own, and don't try to act like you have all the answers. That mindset is valuable, and it'll serve you well. So while I might not have any pill or treatment I can give you to make all your problems go away, I'm here for you. Just don't bug me about stupid things or I'll thump you."
Yasui smiled appreciatively at the panda.
"Thanks, Doctor Gouhin. Oh, on another note, I got invited to this first aid training session at a hospital tomorrow. I was wondering what your thoughts were?"
Gouhin raised an eyebrow.
"Huh? Why?"
"Just… wondering if you thought it was a good idea. I haven't made up my mind yet."
"I can't see why you wouldn't go. First aid is a valuable skill for anyone. And besides, keeping busy will help you deal with the anxiety you're feeling about getting suspended. Win-win."
Yasui nodded.
"That's a good point. And who knows, if I do well I might consider medical school when I graduate."
Gouhin leaned forward, setting down his almost finished cigarette on the edge of his ashtray.
"You are?"
"Well… maybe. I did enjoy helping out around the clinic after the new year, and I seemed to be okay at it. I mean, I might not try to be a doctor or anything, but maybe a nurse."
Gouhin jabbed a finger at him.
"Hey, don't go selling yourself short before you even try. With enough hard work you could get a medical doctorate. And there's all sorts of doctors. You could be a surgeon, diagnostician, neurologist, radiologist, pediatrician, optometrist, and the list goes on."
Yasui smiled at Gouhin.
"Even a psychologist?"
"That's my schtick, get your own."
Yasui chuckled a bit at Gouhin's joke before standing and retrieving his coat from where he'd set it.
"Well, you're probably busy. I'll get out of your fur now, Doctor Gouhin. Thanks for everything, you really helped."
Gouhin waved Yasui's words off dismissively.
"Yeah yeah, now beat it. And you don't have to be so formal with me all the time. Just call me 'Gouhin' from now on, it's easier."
"I will… Gouhin."
"And let me know how your first aid class turns out. I'm curious to see if you have what it takes. You seem a bit squeamish to me, so you might want to be prepared for seeing some blood."
Yasui shook his head.
"Honestly, compared to delivering a baby this should be easy. Goodnight!"
Gouhin did a double take at Yasui's parting comment.
"Deliver a baby?! What the heck was that about?!"
Gouhin shook his head and leaned back in his chair. He pulled out another cigarette before thinking better of it and returning it to the package.
"Hmph, nice kid. Even if he is still a bit of a sissy."
That Saturday saw a change in Shinrai's home. Hana walked out of her room confused as to what was making noise out in the kitchen. To her surprise, Yasui was bent over their small squirrel-sized stove cooking breakfast.
"Good morning, Mrs. Hanako."
Hanako watched him confusedly before returning the greeting.
"Good morning to you too, Yasui."
"I made breakfast for you, and coffee. I realized I never said thank you for letting me stay here."
Hanako took a seat and curiously watched to see what Yasui was making. Whatever it was, it smelled good. Yasui left the frying pan he was using on the stove and moved over to the pot of coffee he made.
"How do you take your coffee?"
"A little sugar and some cream, thank you. So what are you making?"
Yasui set a mug of the hot coffee in front of the female squirrel and returned to his pan.
"I'm making hazelnut crepes with almond mousse filling."
Hanako's eyebrows shot up in surprise.
"Oh, Yasui, you didn't need to go to all that trouble! That sounds like a lot of work!"
Yasui shook his head as he carefully removed another thin crepe from his pan and ladled a small amount of batter in to replace it.
"It's not that difficult. And besides, I enjoy cooking. Sometimes I'm just too busy to take the time to enjoy it."
It was then that Hanako's husband came walking out, looking confused.
"Hanako, what's all the racket?"
Yasui looked back at the male squirrel.
"Sorry for the noise, Mr. Ouga. I was just making breakfast for everyone."
Ouga looked around the kitchen.
"Is there coffee?"
"I'll pour you a cup. How do you take it?"
"Black, if it's any good. Cream and sugar if it's crap."
Yasui nodded and poured him a steaming mug of black coffee. The male squirrel took a sip and "hmph"ed in the back of his throat.
"That's really good. You made this in our house, with our coffee beans and coffee maker?"
Yasui nodded, and Ouga pulled a face. Hanako shot her husband a nasty look.
"Are you saying my coffee isn't any good?"
"No no! It's just… this is something different. Gee are those pancakes? I'm starved!"
Hanako harrumphed as her husband quickly dodged the topic of coffee. She then turned her attention to Yasui.
"So, you seem to be feeling better. Any plans for today? We're having Shinrai and Hana come home for dinner tonight, so be sure you don't miss it if you do have plans."
Yasui smiled at the squirrel.
"Don't worry, I should be back by early afternoon. I'm attending a first aid course from ten to two today."
Ouga looked at Yasui curiously.
"Really? Why?"
Yasui began washing his cooking mess as he answered.
"Well, I sort of delivered a baby and the guys at the hospital were impressed with how well I did. They offered to let me attend their training course to see if I enjoyed it. I've always been interested in medicine, and if it goes well I was thinking I could look into going to medical school. Well, possibly going to medical school. I'd need to get a scholarship and save up some money for that. But this will at least help me make up my mind."
Ouga crossed his arms.
"Seriously, you need to rub some of that attitude off on our son. Shinrai never seems to know what he wants out of life, or cares to make plans! As far as I know, his only ambition is to play video games, fiddle about with cameras sometimes, and live with us until he's fifty. I'm telling you now, I won't be the type of parent whose children live with them and do nothing!"
Hanako shot her husband a warning look, and he sighed and returned to his food. Yasui didn't seem to notice.
"Don't worry about Shinrai, Mr. Ouga. He just has to find out what he's interested in doing. I only recently decided to look into the medical field. Less than a month ago I still had no idea what I wanted to do. Heck, this might be a disaster and I'll be right back with him trying to figure out what to be when I graduate."
Hanako touched her husband's shoulder and frowned.
"High school is a tough time, and he's only a first year student. He has time."
Ouga grumbled but spent the rest of the meal in silence.
Yasui ate quickly and finished washing his dishes before grabbing his coat and heading out the door. It was cold today, but at least it was sunny. As he walked towards the train station, Yasui took out his phone and quickly sent a text to Shinrai telling him what he was up to as well as that he was looking forward to seeing him tonight.
(That way, he won't be worried about me. I mean, I'm assuming he was at least a little worried about me. But then again, Shinrai is pretty laid back. He could have just assumed I would be fine missing school for a while. Geez, I'm going to have so much work to make up when my suspension is over!)
Yasui pushed aside the nagging thought of "if he wasn't expelled." He couldn't do anything about that, so it didn't make sense to torture himself with it. Just stay busy, and hope for the best.
As Yasui took a place in the only empty seat on the train, he looked out the window and thought about what this first aid class might be like. Would it be hands-on, or more theoretical? What was going to be covered? Maybe stitches and setting broken bones? Or was that too advanced? For all Yasui knew they might just be teaching them to put bandages on and clean cuts.
The train stopped at the next station, and Yasui leaned his head idly on his arm. He hoped they provided lunch. He assumed they would given the class went from ten to two. Yasui perked his head up as he heard somebody's raised voice as the doors began to close.
"Wait wait wait! Hold on!"
Yasui watched as a snake, thinner around and slightly smaller than Chaussette, just barely slipped through the closing doors. It panted slightly as the train lurched forward, and then awkwardly began looking for somewhere to go. Yasui remembered Chaussette talking about how much she hated riding the train one day. Apparently if you didn't ride in the reptile car, which one might not do if they were running late and had to get on the train as quickly as possible, it was cold and uncomfortable unless you were lucky enough to get a seat. Because if you didn't get a seat, you just had to climb up one of the cold metal poles or stay on the floor and risk getting stepped on.
As the snake moved towards a pole, Yasui waved to catch its attention.
"Hey, want my seat?"
The snake looked at him in surprise. Yasui stood and gestured to the seat he had been in. The snake gratefully slithered into it and nodded at Yasui.
"Thankssss, I appreciate it."
"No worries. My friend told me how much it sucks to cling to one of the poles."
"Oh! Well, thankssss again."
Yasui nodded to the snake and wrapped his hand around a nearby pole as the train rounded a bend. Four more stops to the hospital.
The scenery blurred into nothingness as the train sped through the city. One stop. Two stops. It was funny, everyone was staring at their phones and not even looking out the windows. Yasui always looked out the windows when he rode the train. Especially if he was near one that faced the harbor. The water looked especially brilliant in the clear winter air with the bright sunlight glimmering off the waves. Stop number three. Yasui watched as three more animals got onto the train. Two young hawks, and a female pig with red, puffy eyes. Yasui was surprised she was riding in this car. Most herbivores rode in the herbivore only car.
Still, nobody seemed to notice or care that she was there. Yasui was pretty sure he was the only person who saw her. She locked eyes with him, and he nodded a slight greeting. She moved over to stand at the same pole as him. Yasui made some space for her.
He tried not to stare at the pig, but it was hard not to since this leg of the train ride went through a tunnel. She was very fidgety, and sniffled occasionally while wiping her eyes. She might have a cold or something, Yasui thought. She kept looking at Yasui, fidgeting, and then looking away. It was making Yasui uncomfortable. Did he have something on his face? Was his nose running and he hadn't realized? Why was she looking at him so much?
Then, the pig did something really odd. She swallowed, looked resolutely at Yasui, and slapped both cheeks twice while maintaining direct eye contact with him. Yasui blinked curiously at her.
(Is she drowsy? She might have taken too much cold medicine and is feeling groggy. Poor lady, I hope she feels better. Oh! I have a travel pack of tissues in my pocket! I should offer her one.)
Yasui pulled out the tissues and held them towards the pig. She looked momentarily confused, before Yasui gave her a reassuring smile and nodded. The pig grew a look of comprehension, took a tissue, and continued looking nervous and slightly sick to her stomach. Definitely too much cold medicine.
The train slid into the station, and Yasui walked out the car doors. It was only a short walk to the hospital, and currently it was only nine twenty. So Yasui had some time to kill. He could always find some random store to go into, if any caught his eyes. Yasui scanned the street through the bustle of people doing some weekend shopping, and his eyes fixed on a store called "The Spice Jar."
The Spice Jar turned out to be a decent sized store filled with different bottles and packets of teas, herbs, seasonings, and spices. The air smelled of tea and pepper. Yasui began idly glancing over the spices on display, and occasionally would pick one up to sniff it. He really liked the way that a sachet of "extra smoky chipotle chili" smelled, and could see it going well with some sweet vegetables. Maybe as a sweet and spicy vegetable roast. Yasui did love spicy food.
"Uh… what are you doing?"
Yasui started slightly and turned to see the pig from the train staring at him with an expression that read half queasy, half impatient. Yasui gestured with the spices he was holding.
"I was just smelling this. I bet it would go great with some sweet vegetables, like corn or carrots."
The pig frowned.
"Are you… picking out seasoning for me?"
Yasui blinked at her before hesitantly replying.
"Do… do you want me to?"
"I don't know! It's not like I've done this before!"
Yasui was slightly taken aback at the pig's weird behavior. Was she asking for help picking out seasonings for food? Did she think he worked here? Why was she being so pushy? Yasui sighed, deciding to just roll with it. Given how puffy and red her eyes were, and the sour look on her face that screamed stomach problems, Yasui picked up a little bottle of turmeric and showed it to her.
"Here, this stuff goes great in soups and stews. And it's a natural anti-inflammatory. So it should help with stomach problems. Couple it with some ginger which helps with nausea and your set."
The pig looked sick to her stomach and insulted now.
"Do you think that I—" she looked around quickly and dropped her voice. "That I'm going to give you a stomach ache?!"
Yasui was certain he had misheard her. He puzzled in his brain what she might have meant to say. Maybe, "Do you think I have a stomach ache?" or it could be she meant that he thought her cooking would give stomach aches. But what a weird way to say it!
"Uh… no?" Was the only thing Yasui could think to say. The pig huffed nervously and looked around.
"Could you please just hurry up already! We need to find somewhere private!"
(Does she think I'm someone else? She could have been meeting someone on the train for… something.)
Yasui looked out the door of the shop, half expecting to see someone frantically looking around for the female pig. Finally he scratched his head.
"Were you… looking for someone specific? Because I'm Yasui, not… well… whoever specific you were looking for."
"I wasn't looking for someone specific! I just picked you!"
Suddenly Yasui's mouth went dry. He had a sneaking suspicion what this was. This was some sort of weird, pervy hookup thing! Shinrai had mentioned that some animals in the city had "hook-ups" where they met random strangers and slept together! She must have been doing some sort of code to say she was looking for a hook-up! And then he smiled and nodded!
Yasui held his hands up defensively.
"Oh geez! I'm so, so sorry ma'am! But I'm not interested in… you know… that! I totally was just being nice and offered you a tissue because I thought you were sick!"
"You mean you… you don't…."
Yasui shook his head vigorously. To his shock, the pig started to cry.
"Oh God, I'm so disgusting and pathetic I can't even get eaten! Do I really look that unappealing?!"
If Yausi's eyes felt like they were popping out of his head before, now they might as well have fallen out of his skull.
"Eat you!" Yasui yelped. He immediately looked around and bent over to be closer to the pig's eye level.
"Why would I eat you?!" Yasui loudly whispered. "Why would you even think I want to eat you?! What is wrong with you?!"
"B-because I heard if you slapped your cheeks at a carnivore on the subway that was you telling them you wanted them to eat you!"
"And the carnivore gets no say in the matter?!"
The pig looked guilty at that, and averted her eyes.
"I… I guess I didn't think about that. I'm sorry, I'm really sorry. I'm such an idiot!"
And with that, the pig turned and ran out of the store. Yasui tried to call out after her, but she either didn't hear him or ignored him. He sighed and checked his watch. Nine twenty-nine.
(I have to go after her, don't I. She's clearly either insane or on drugs or something else. Why me! Why does this crap always happen to me!)
Yasui set down the spices and ran after the pig, frantically trying to get her to stop. The animal who had been behind the counter huffed.
"Or don't buy anything, that's fine too. I swear, window shoppers."