Two rooms on the Excess Express; one luxury and one standard. Two people maximum occupancy per room, leaving only four seats for our group of…good god, nine people!? Anyway, with me and Peach already taking up two seats, that left two openings to fill up. With the odds of us running into Vivian's sisters I was hesitant to allow her to come along but she insisted on being there in case they did. With her encyclopedia like knowledge, it also made sense to bring Goombella and fill up that last slot…of course, that would have been the EASY way of doing this, but given how weird a group we had, that wasn't really how it went down.
Stepping into the deluxe room of the ship I shared with Peach, I set my backpack down on the top bunk bed as Peach set her hefty looking backpack onto the bottom bunk. When she did, she unzipped it and pulled out Eggi who immediately stretched his arms and legs after being crammed into a bag.
"Can't believe you snuck him in." I said as Peach set him down.
"I'm not abandoning my little Eggi. We have to be good parents and bring him on family trips." When it came to Eggi she went hard on the family angle between the three of us…I'd laugh it off if there wasn't a tinge of future doom behind the notion I couldn't quite shake.
"Just make sure the staff doesn't catch him, we'll end up kicked off if they do."
"I'm sure we can make an exception for such a cute father and his family." The familiar flirtatious tone had me turn to see Mowz dressed up in what I assume is a waitress uniform for the trains…did trains have waitresses…maybe butlers for something this ritzy.
"This a disguise or did you actually sign up for working?"
"Oh String Cheese, think of me as your personal attendant while on board."
"Disguise, gotcha." She gave me a playful wink in return.
"U-Um, Soren?" From just outside our room, Vivian and Goombella were waiting to come in. Quickly ushering everyone inside, I closed to door as everyone took a seat where they could; Goombella sitting on the nearby two person sofa with Vivian while Peach sat on the bed with Eggi in her lap and Mowz hopped up to sit on the window sill.
"…We're short a person." A knock at our cabin door had me pull it open to have Koops stumble in.
"Sorry, my boss handed me a bunch of menus to give to each room." He said handing me the breakfast menu before joining the others. Mowz refused to elaborate how but apparently one of the staff got sick right before the train was ready to take off so Koops swooped in to take the spot, "…Where's Bobbery and Flurrie?" Pulling out my Scroll, I showed Koops a picture Flurrie had sent me. She was on one of her clouds posing to the camera. Next to her on the same cloud was Bobbery who looked a bit paler as they had positioned themselves high above the train and following at the same speed. For Flurrie it was no issue, but for Bobbery it was like taking a plane trip with open windows; not that I thought Flurrie wouldn't give him a comfortable trip as they followed us from above.
That run in with Beldam had me and Vivian on edge. Even if she had backed off due to her disadvantage, we were basically stuck in a moving box for the next three days. Three days she could use to swoop in and kidnap Peach and the map. We couldn't just have it be the usual small group, we needed everyone's help to keep Peach safe.
"Everyone knows the drill, right?" I asked. "Keep an eye out for Beldam or Marylin. They could be anywhere on this train." Everyone nodded. I turned to Peach and was surprised to find she had changed in the short time I had looked away, swapping out of her adventuring outfit to a slimmed down version of her pink dress. Seems she was all in on treating this like a casual train ride…although, that kind of worked in our favor. The more relaxed we appeared, the more likely they were to strike, "Just make sure not to look too tense and…take it easy, if we're lucky this should just be a nice peaceful train ride. Just keep an eye open." That seem to calm everyone's nerves a bit…except for Vivian, but that would be a talk for later, "Alright, break." With that finisher, everyone left our room, leaving Peach, me and Eggi. Taking off my jacket and fingerless gloves, I switched to a button up black collared shirt over my red shirt, leaving it unbuttoned to resemble a more relaxed version of my usual look. I looked over to Peach who had a slightly disappointed look.
"Not even any shorts?" I shrugged.
"Relaxed is my usual style. This is just a slight step up." She gave a sigh before getting up and grabbing my arm as Eggi sat on her shoulder.
"I'll drop it for now. Let's go check out the rest of the train." She was quick to drag me out of the room before I could respond, taking control of our three day 'relaxing' trip.
All in all, the whole train was smaller than I expected a luxury liner to be. The one time I had taken a train before almost compared to what this offered. Three box cars for passengers, a dinning car, a sitting car, the back for storage, and the front driver car. A bit underwhelming but the company was another matter.
The first other passenger we ran into described himself as a 'food connoisseur' being a rather portly toad man. Apparently he had scrapped up every coin he could get to afford a ticket just to try the deluxe meals they served as part of the basic passage. I had to stand back as he described the dishes due to him salivating from just his own words. Seemed his laser focus would mean asking him if he'd seen a witch on the train was pointless.
An upper-class toad woman seemed to indulge in the luxury of her car, reclined on a sofa and soaking in the room she had paid for. Most of her conversation seem to involve alliteration, using fanciful words to describe myself and Peach; calling me, 'a decadent dapper man' and Peach, 'a pristine prime woman'. Honestly, following any level of conversation with her had me lost for words, but Peach seemed to effortlessly hold ground with this wordsmith of a woman. Asking her if Beldam had gotten onto the train had only caused her to blush as she assumed I was remarking on her 'bewitching beauty' which meant she was also a dead end.
This next person I could only describe as…generic movie star looking. Sporting a half-buttoned blazer and wearing sunglasses even in the gentle lighting of the room. Apparently, he was a big movie star called Zip Toad on his way to shoot a movie in Poshley Heights. Before I could even get a word in edge wise to ask if he'd seen anything strange, he quickly retorted that he only signed autographs for cute chicks before giving a signed photo of himself to Peach. Not going to be any help.
The oddness of the penguin man in a Sherlock Holmes had me stop for a moment before meeting the next passenger. Conversation was brief though, he gave us no name, looked us over, and described me as a secret agent on board for some hidden scheme, then described Peach as a girl in over her head following me on my dangerous mission in order to find her father, before turning, swearing he would keep our secret, and walking away…well, all I can say is he LOOKED like Sherlock Holmes.
I shouldn't have been surprised to find a rat man in a suit and tie on a business trip. But it still took me off guard as I rolled the title in my head a few times. Apparently he was heading to Poshley Heights to conduct an important deal for his boss, although he didn't seem to down about it being a business trip since it meant he could throw everything on the expense account when he got back. At least he had the chance to make the most of his trip. Unfortunately, he hadn't seen hid nor hair of the old witch we were keeping an eye out for.
The last passengers were actually slightly familiar, a bob-bomb family with an aristocratic air to them. I'd remembered catching a glimpse of them a few weeks back during the trip to Glitzville which feels like months ago at the pace we've been going. Thankfully they seem to recognize me and Peach immediately as the champions of the Glitz Pit, with their son even recognizing Eggi. The family was headed to Poshley Heights for a gift for their son Bub, who was extra excited as he glanced around the train interior. They even agreed to keep an eye out for anything weird they saw on the train and let us know immediately. So, half-progress was made.
But with meeting everyone I had to admit that this train seemed almost too peaceful. Taking a seat in the dinning car I let out a sigh and munched on the bread sticks that had been placed at our table. It looked like this would be a nice relaxing train ride at this point…damn, this is good bread.
"So many colorful people ride this train." Peach mused.
"Yeah, I was surprised." I replied. "I was expecting a lot of high-class hoity toity types but that was only…three out of the six we met if we count the bob-bomb family as one."
"But all of them seemed like regular people at least." I let out a deep sigh as I sank into my chair.
"Yeah. This should be a nice simple trip." Opening up the menu placed at our table, I glanced over the options…before placing it back down, "With bread sticks as my main dish." Peach giggled at my comment. If only she knew it wasn't a joke.
"U-Um, Soren?" Vivian and Goombella had approached our table with a note in hand, "I found this slid under our door." Taking the note from her, I read it aloud.
"Don't go to Poshley Heights! You and your friends better get off the train now, or a sticky, yummy doom awaits it!" Weird warning.
"Sticky, yummy doom?" Peach asked as I handed the note to her to read.
"A warning if I've ever heard one." Goombella said.
"A strange one though..." Vivian mused. "What does it even allude to?"
"Guess that's up to us to find out." I said straightening back up in my seat, relaxing was going to have to wait, "Was the note at your room when you got back or did you see it get slid under your door?"
"I saw it come sliding in." Goombella answered.
"I went to look but no one was there. Then we came to find you." Vivian added. Looking up at the clock, I noticed it was ten past noon. If they went to our room first then came here I could probably place them getting the note around noon or five minutes after…hang on, if its noon then where is the complementary lunch? The itinerary we were given said lunch would be at noon sharp.
Looking around, I could see a few passengers huddled around the cooking area. Mowz and Koops were nearby was well. Standing up, I made my way over as the others followed, eventually coming to the distraught cheep cheep chef and the toad waitress trying to console him.
"How could my dish to macing…er, missing!? Now what will I serve!?"
"What happened?" I asked and the waitress looked up at me in surprise.
"Apologies sir, your lunch is going to be a bit behind schedule."
"Apparently the stew pot has gone missing." Mowz answered.
"But how?" Koops asked. "That thing was massive and filled to the brim last time we saw it.
"A mystery is afoot it seems." All of us turned to find the peculiar Sherlock Penguin standing nearby. He walked slowly up to us, letting each step hold us in place with his presence before stopping just shy of the huddle we had created around the chef, "A mystery that shall be called…'The Case of the Pot of Supper Stew that Vanished suddenly and Mysteriously'!" Almost in an instance the gravitas he had earned in his approached dissipated at his lackluster name for the mystery, "Indeed, that will do nicely." Looking over, I noticed a pondering look on Peach's face as she gave out a small hum of thought.
"How about… 'The mystery of STEWpendous disappearance'?"
"Getting in over your head ingenue." He replied and she huffed in annoyance. It wasn't a bad alternative…I think we can do better but it was a step up at least, "Now, my dear fellow passengers. This is a full fledge mystery. One that impacts you all!" This made everyone around us seem to panic slightly.
"What kind of dish is that?" The chef asked. Thankfully, despite the deadpanned response, that seem to calm everyone down slightly.
"I am known as Pennington." The detective penguin informed us. "You likely would not guess it, but I am a detective. At the risk of immodesty, you might say I have a certain nose for these things. And this little conundrum, my dear fellow passengers…poses no challenge…to me." The other passengers murmured amongst themselves as I tried to size this penguin up. Detective stories were some of my favorites and I was a bit interested and slightly skeptical of his proclamation. Mostly due to his size up of me and Peach upon our brief first meeting.
"So what have you got?" I asked without trying to sound like I was trying to push him. Luckily, he didn't seem to notice.
"The central clue of this case and also the most vital one, as it happens…is that the perpetrator took the whole pot, stew and all! And this esteemed friends…leads me to believe that the one responsible…" he whipped around and pointed at the waitress next to the chef, "Is YOU, you gluttonous woman!" The waitress gave out a shocked gasp.
"Me!? Are you totally koo-koo? I have like, NO idea what you're talking about…" Pennington re-centered himself and cleared his throat.
"My apologies madam. I felt it necessary to practice my accusation skills on you." A silence fell over the passengers. Right, this guy was a 'detective' in name only, "…Ahem. Very good. Yes, this will be a case worthy of my intellect."
"So…we don't know who the culprit is. Is that about right?" The rat businessman said.
"Pft, this is totally lame." Zip Toad said, popping his collar. "I'm going back to my room." Pennington turned his attention to the famous star.
"In a bit of a hurry to get back to your room eh? I have broken this case! The true culprit, I believe…is Zip Toad, the actor!" Somehow, the waitress gave an even louder gasp of disbelief.
"How dare you accuse Zip Toad you geezer!" She continued to hurl barbs at Pennington who seemed frozen in place from the sheer force of her rage. This was going to go nowhere. Mowz quickly pulled me aside.
"As fun as this is, maybe we should ACTUALLY work at solving this matter."
"I'm with you on that." I agreed. "Mind helping me with your keen eye?"
"What's a detective without their assistant?" She teased. Turning to look at Peach, I gave her a motion to smooth out the tension and keep everyone busy. She gave me a quick smile before immediately putting her diplomacy skills to work.
"Alright, give me a minute to think." Hmmm…they took the whole pot of stew…Koops said it had been filled to the brim…getting it down from the stove top without spilling would have been basically impossible. Looking over, I noticed a stain of stew near the burner I assumed the stew had been placed on, "How good is your nose for non-badge related findings?"
"Top notch." Mowz bragged. Sliding over, I ran my finger over the stew stain and held it up to Mowz's nose. She gave it a whiff before quickly sucking the stew remnants of my finger, causing my face to immediately heat up, "Not bad taste either." Going back to sniffing as though she hadn't just sucked my finger, she followed the scent, me following her lead as we made our way through the dinning car and into one of the passenger cars.
Eventually we came to a passenger cabin, Mowz throwing open the door to find the rather portly toad man sitting inside.
"Wh-Wh—Whoa! What do you want!?" He gave out a sizable belch and Mowz nose crinkled slightly as she stepped back, "Sorry about that. Now…what do you need?"
"A stew has gone missing from the dinning car." I spoke. "My partner here traced the smell back to this room." Looking outside, I also noticed small specks of stains in the carpet…that all led to this room. Although, it seemed the portly toad didn't quite seem to like what we were implying.
"Oh, I get it! Food gets stolen and you blame the chubby guy! NOT NICE!"
"Well then, I'm sure you wouldn't mind me, an employe searching your room for train property." Mowz said with an almost business-like snake smile.
"N-Not at all." He replied much more sheepish. Mowz gave a whiff around the room…but she suddenly looked confused.
"This whole room just smells like the stew. I can't pinpoint it."
"THAT DOESN'T MEAN I TOOK IT! I JUST HAVE SOME STEW FROM HOME!" Despite his outcry, we couldn't convict him without any evidence. Unless we could actually find the pot, we were just pulling at a very suspicious string…looking around the room, I noticed a bottle of carpet cleaner was sitting on the nearby windowsill. Taking a closer look at the carpet, I could see small speckles of darkened carpet where it had been used…and a large amount of it had been used around the dresser. Moving towards the dresser, I noticed the portly toad following me with his eyes, becoming more nervous as I got closer. Mowz followed behind me and when I stopped in front of it, she opened the drawer to reveal a stack of foodie magazines, one even about the Excess Express's Chef Shimi…I hope his first name isn't Sa. Pulling those back, I wasn't too surprised to find a pot with what looked to be remnants of the stew inside; not enough for a bowl, but just enough to prove it was the same stew from the dinning car. Pulling this out was the last straw for his defense, "…I admit it! It was MEEEEEEEEE!"
From that point, we brought the portly toad back to the chef, along with the empty stew pot. Everyone murmured in shock and admiration at our ability to find the culprit. All but Pennington who gave me a once over as the portly toad apologized to Chef Shimi profusely. After everyone had dispersed, leaving only my group and Pennington, the detective approached me.
"It seems I rightfully sized up your ability to find the culprit." Sure, "As such, I would like to develop your skills further, and assist in finding the culprit who left your group that note." Whoa, he actually caught me off guard with that revelation.
"How did you-" Vivian started.
"As the lone detective on this train, I am privy to all strange goings on. But we must no speak here. See me in my room in cabin 6, and keep your company small. Groups attract flies. My cabin has a maximum occupancy of three." With a quick turn, Pennington walked away.
"So much for a vacation." Koops sighed. I had to agree.
"Looks like we went from Vacation on the Excess Express to Mystery on the Excess Express."
"Sounds better to me." Goombella said. "I signed up for adventure, not leisure." Good to know Goombella doesn't have an off switch.