Hermione woke up the next morning to an empty bed. She'd slept so soundly next to Ginny that she didn't even notice when the other girl wasn't next to her anymore. The thought made her stomach clench tight. Hermione wondered if Ginny had made sure she was up first so that they wouldn't be confronted with any awkwardness from last night or maybe it was all in Hermione's head and Ginny just hadn't wanted to wake her.
That kiss, Hermione thought as she took a deep breath and threw the covers off. Ginny hadn't kissed her like someone who was trying to "help a friend feel comfortable in her own skin." She'd kissed Hermione the way that Hermione herself had only dreamt of kissing Ginny, like Hermione was an oasis in the middle of the desert and the young Weasley girl was going to drink every last drop. The thought made Hermione shiver.
She stood from the bed and tried to shake off the anxiety as she dressed for breakfast. When she walked into the kitchen, everyone else was already up and seated around the table. Ginny and Harry were playfully tussling with each other as the latter tried to smear some part of his breakfast on her face. Hermione rolled her eyes. Back to business as usual.
"Stop it, Harry!" Ginny's giggle cut off abruptly when she noticed Hermione approach the empty chair next to Ron and directly across from her. Her spine went perfectly straight, and she shifted her body away from Harry. "Good morning," she smiled up at Hermione as she sat down.
Hermione tried to hide her blush as her eyes met Ginny's, but she couldn't help how her lips tingled at the memory of last night. She cleared her throat in an effort to make her voice sound composed, "Good morning."
Mr. Weasley clapped his hands together at the head of the table, "So, tomorrow's the big day. How's everyone feeling?"
"Nervous," Harry said after swallowing a mouth full of toast. The others nodded in agreement.
"Excited too, though," Ginny added without taking her eyes off Hermione.
Hermione swallowed the squeak that threatened to leave her throat when she felt a foot that she was certain belonged to Ginny slide up her shin. She widened her eyes at the girl across from her, but all Ginny did was smirk back at her, continuing her caress against Hermione's shin. Hermione tried to give her a "What the hell are you doing?" look as subtly as she could, but Ginny just tossed her long red hair over her shoulder and went back to eating her breakfast. A deep breath left her chest that Hermione hadn't realized she was holding when Ginny's foot finally released contact.
Once breakfast was over and everyone got up to disperse and go about their day, Hermione grabbed Ginny by the elbow and pulled her away from the others. "What the hell was that?" Hermione demanded through gritted teeth.
Ginny tilted her head innocently, "I'm not sure what you're referring to."
Hermione looked around to make sure that the others hadn't noticed them. She pulled Ginny up the stairs and into her bedroom. "You know exactly what I'm referring to," she growled as the door shut behind them. "All that business at breakfast, what were you doing?"
Ginny's head fell back as she laughed, "Oh come on, Hermione. It was just a bit of fun." She crossed her arms and cocked a playful eyebrow in Hermione's direction, "I thought a cheeky flirt would show you that things aren't weird between us."
"You can't just do things like that, Ginny," Hermione huffed and stamped her foot. "People's feelings are involved."
The redhead scrunched her forehead in confusion, "I told you it isn't a big deal. If you want me to talk to Harry—"
"Not everything's about Harry!" Hermione exclaimed before she could help herself. Merlin, this must be what it feels like to be Ron. She plopped down on the bed and massaged the bridge of her nose.
"Then what is it about?" Ginny's voice was much calmer than Hermione's, and it was clear she wasn't feeling any of the inner turmoil Hermione was.
Hermione huffed again and stood up from the bed, "Just forget about it. I think it's best if I sleep in one of the spare rooms tonight. We go back to Hogwarts tomorrow. I'll be in the Head Girl's dormitory anyway." Mrs. Weasley had presented her with the Head Girl badge that had come with her Hogwarts letter yesterday when she informed her all of the school shopping had been taken care of.
She moved to leave the room, but Ginny placed a gentle hand on her upper arm to stop her. "Hermione, what's going on?" she asked, her concerned eyes desperately searching Hermione's for an answer.
"Nothing," Hermione shook her head. "I just need some space. Tomorrow's a big day, and I just want to be prepared." She gave Ginny a small smile as she pushed past her and out of the room.
Later that evening, Hermione sat in the living room under lamp light perusing one of her 7th year text books. Harry wandered into the room in an odd attempt at looking casual but mostly looking awkward. Hermione raised her eyebrows at him and closed her book. "What's up?" she asked as he took a seat next to her.
"I had a talk with Ginny just now," he said.
Hermione felt the color draining from her face as her heartrate sped up to what she was certain was an extremely unhealthy pace. Harry must've noticed because an equally sympathetic smile soon followed. "She told me about the kiss," he added.
The bottom dropped out of Hermione's stomach. She did what?! Hermione racked her brain for something, anything to say to that, but for the first time in her life, she came up empty.
Harry's chin fell to his chest, "She said it didn't mean anything, and that it was just her way of showing you that she supports you and is comfortable with your sexuality." He looked up at those words and met Hermione's eyes, "That's not true, though, is it?"
Hermione couldn't help but flinch at the question. What was she supposed to say? "Sorry, Harry, but the love of your life is also the love of mine, and I took advantage of an innocent situation to get what I wanted." She's sure that would go over swimmingly.
"I figured," he breathed out as though he'd read her mind. "Ginny told me you felt guilty because you were worried about upsetting my feelings. I appreciate that."
She should say something, right? Should she apologize or would that make her seem even more guilty considering Ginny didn't think they had anything to apologize for? All she could do, though, was simply stare back at him.
"But she kissed you anyway," Harry continued, looking dejected. "I should have seen it coming."
Hermione managed to shake away some of her stupor at his words, "Wait, you should've seen what coming?"
Harry chuckled but it was an empty laugh, "Come on, Hermione, you're supposed to be the smart one. Ginny clearly has feelings for you."
Her forehead wrinkled at Harry's unexpected words as she stared back at him incredulously and shook her head, "What? No, she doesn't."
"She was different the whole time you were gone," he responded as if that were some how evidence. "You were all she talked about. What you might be up to, when your next letter would come, when she thought you might return. I brushed it off mostly as her missing her friend. You two were practically inseparable before you went to Australia."
Hermione shifted in her seat to face him, "Harry, that was just an after effect of the war. We leaned on each other as friends, that's all."
He shrugged, "It might have started that way, but it's different now. I mean, the first thing she did when you two were alone was kiss you, even after you voiced concern for my feelings. Then, she only told me about it because you were upset about hurting me. I'm supposed to be her boyfriend. My feelings should matter to her as well."
Tears prickled the back of Hermione's eyes, "Harry, you have to know that I would never—"
"I know," he cut her off. "You're a good friend, Hermione, and I'm not angry with you. Maybe I should be, I don't know. It's not like I could have prepared myself for this." He turned his head to meet her eyes just as the tears started falling down Hermione's cheeks. He reached up and wiped them away. "I love her," he almost whispered between them. "I don't know how not to, even now. I won't end it. I just ask that you do me the courtesy of waiting until she does."
Before Hermione could respond, Harry stood up and walked up the stairs. She just sat there and stared blankly at the wall across the room from her. That boy was delusional. He had to be. Ginny didn't have feelings for her. The kiss really hadn't meant anything, at least not to Ginny. Hermione had to prove that to Harry somehow, which made her decision to sleep in a separate room and keep her distance make even more sense. Hermione let her head fall into her hands as more tears started to pour from her eyes.
Ginny appeared in the doorway moments later as if she'd been summoned by Hermione's inner turmoil. When she saw Hermione shaking with sobs, she darted over and threw her arms around the older girl as she sat down next to her.
"I was just looking for you. I've barely seen you all day. Hermione, what's wrong?" she pulled Hermione's hands from her face and reached up to cup her face, turning it so she would look into Ginny's eyes.
"Harry," Hermione managed to get out through shaky breaths.
Ginny's eyes narrowed, "What about Harry? What did he do? Was he crass with you because of the kiss? Bloody hell, I told him it wasn't a big deal."
She shot up from the couch as if she were going to go confront him right then, but Hermione's hand shot out and grabbed her wrist to stop her. "No!" she exclaimed, "He wasn't crass. We just talked."
Ginny sat back down next to her gently, placing a hand on top of the one that Hermione still had on her wrist, "Then, why are you crying?"
"Because, Ginny," Hermione responded as more tears started to well up in her eyes, "the kiss was a very big deal."
"Hermione, you don't have to worry. I talked to Harry. You don't have to feel guilty anymore," she reached up and took Hermione's face in her hands again wiping the tears away with her thumbs in much the same way Harry had earlier.
Hermione took a deep breath. It was time for her to be honest. Keeping all of her feelings locked up inside was starting to tear her apart, and she didn't have a sweet Australian bartender to sing her woes to. "But I do feel guilty, Ginny. I shouldn't have let the kiss happen. You kissed me under the impression that it didn't mean anything, but it did to me."
The sympathetic smile that graced Ginny's face was another action that mirrored her conversation with Harry, "Because it was the first time you kissed a girl?"
Hermione let out an exasperated laugh, "Merlin, have you always been this thick?"
Hurt flashed in the brown eyes that were staring intently into hers, "You've never called me that before."
"I'm sorry," Hermione groaned pulling a hand down her face. "I don't think you're thick. This is just hard for me to say. I was hoping you'd just. . .figure it out."
"Figure what out? Hermione, please, just tell me."
"The kiss was a big deal because I have feelings for you, Ginny. Real feelings," she willed herself not to break eye contact with the other girl. "I knew before you kissed me. Hell, I knew before I left for Australia. That's why it was wrong. I shouldn't have kissed you because I wanted so badly to kiss you. I took advantage. That's why I've been feeling guilty."
Ginny's eyes went wide, and she shifted away from Hermione the slightest bit. Hermione deflated. She'd done it. She told Ginny her true feelings and the younger girl was mortified, even though she was trying hard not to show it. Being the brightest witch of her age, she'd seen this coming, but it didn't make the heartbreak any less painful. She stood from the couch and tried to compose herself, picking up her textbook and holding it to her chest. "I'll just go," she mumbled before moving to exit the living room.