Jeremy pulled himself together. He had thinking to do, and thinking usually worked better when he had things to do, so he was going to do some things.
Like gardening.
They weren't really good at gardening, considering the intermittent nature of their stays here, but some things kept growing once they had been planted. Probably too early to clear the ground, especially since it was still getting colder from yesterday's wind change, but he could take a look at what was growing. Maybe he'd find something new.
The mountain forest was good at surprises.
There were the medicine plants, too. They kept those better protected and taken care of. Some of the early ones should be starting to peep out. With it getting cold again – Jeremy glanced at the drizzle colored sky – it might not be a bad idea to bring some babies in, just in case.
Working with the plants always kept his hands busy, and his mind could think out things while his hands worked. There wasn't nothing wrong with that. It was like the order of working with things made his thinking more ordered.
He wondered if that was why Jason paced when he had to think. Did his feet do the same thing as Jeremy's hands? Or maybe his eyes, because he had to watch where he was going? Looking at things made him see other things better?
So, Jeremy worked with plants, barely noticing when the dirt started turning to mud.
Not until an ice drop went down his collar, and he looked around in surprise. Everything was starting to look shiny!
He looked up, and was hit in the face by a flurry of sleet, and he stood up and laughed.
He gathered his teeny handmade pots and ran inside with them.
He arranged the pots, and cleaned his hands and face, changed his shirt, and cleaned the cabin. He started a meal in the oven, and made coffee. His brothers would be here soon, maybe some of the men with them.
Jason didn't wait around with ice. When it started and didn't stop, no matter how light, he'd call off work. Of all the elements, ice was the most dangerous to their work.
They'd be home.
Jeremy finished arranging the pots and cleaned up around them.
He set the table.
He looked around, satisfied, and pleased with himself.
The sleet had turned to wet snow by the time Jason and Josh emerged from the trees. They jogged up to the porch. Jason pulled up the corner of the blanket over Jeremy's head. "You know, there's this wonderful garment called a coat, that's made for weather like this."
Jeremy grinned. "I'm not cold. Or wet," he added, looking away from his brothers when he remembered how wet he had got working in the garden.
"Mm," Jason said, with a glance at Josh, who was laughing.
They went inside. To a clean, warm, well lit, good smelling room. "Doesn't look like he had too much time for mischief," Jason said.
"Uh-huh," Josh agreed, and headed to the plants. "Somebody's getting spring fever, looks like. You covered everything back up?"
"Of c-course." Jeremy was pouring coffee while his brothers took off their outerwear. He took the meal of meat and vegetables out of the oven, while they put their things away. Josh 'discovered' Jeremy's wet shirt and picked it up by the collar for Jason to see.
Jason shook his head, but the eyes of both the brothers were laughing. Neither said anything, as they slid into the chairs for an effortless supper.
"I've got some news," Jason said, when they'd finished eating.
"Good or b-bad?"
"You're too young to be so suspicious," Jason said. "I don't know. Seems our friend Bilby has a reputation. There will have to be a hearing. He was freed by Judge Cleary in Bellewater on condition he not repeat his fighting. Judge Cleary will be here by the middle of next week."
"Oh." That wasn't good. If a judge was already coming there wasn't much could be done. Jeremy shuddered.
Jason saw this. "A hearing isn't the same as a trial, you know. You won't have to testify in front of an open court. Probably just talk to the judge. Privately."
"H-how p-privatl-ly?"
"That will probably be up to the judge. I'll probably be allowed in the room with you, maybe all the way across the room, but I'll be there." The last words were a promise.
Jeremy nodded, watching his hands wrap around each other. "D-don't wanna," he said in a trembling voice.
"I don't want you to have to, but there's nothing I can do."
"H-hide m-me?" Jeremy suggested, lifting his eyes hopefully.
"If I did that –" it wasn't like he hadn't had the same thought – " I don't think it would work, Jeremy. If I thought it would –. But then, what if Bilby gets away with fighting you that way, and because you didn't tell the judge what happened, he goes out and does it again to someone else, and maybe hurts and kills them? I don't know about you, but I'd feel like I was guilty if that were to happen."
"And you'd have to hide every time the judge came around. That isn't practical." Trust Josh to be practical.
"So what do you think?" It was soon to be expecting a reaction, but they needed to know what Jeremy was thinking.
Jeremy whimpered, one little squeak, before nodding. "I c-can t-try." Time to act grown up, even if he didn't feel grown up. Sometimes things just had to be done. That was being grown up.
"That's all any of us can do." Just when he'd been getting to be more social with people, too. Something else that had been learned these last few months. Dammit.
Dammit dammit dammit.
"Th-that isn't the y-yelling judge, is it?"
"What? No. No, Cleary doesn't yell. That's Berkeley." Josh supplied the answer.
"J-jason, what if he d-d-d-d-don't underst-t-tand m-me?"
"I'll have to tell him what you're saying. Or Josh. Unless we can find someone else who understands. He might think I'm saying you're saying what he thinks I want you to say , and – lordy, that got all tangled up, didn't it?"
"Uh-huh. G-guess he'd th-think the same thing 'bout Josh, huh?"
"Possibly."
"Huh."
They fell silent, each brother thinking his own thoughts, but they were the same thought.
Jeremy shook his head, then refilled the coffee cups and returned the pot to the back of the stove.
His brothers thanked him, and waited until he rejoined them at the table.
They waited more, each wishing they knew what to say or how to say it.
IF to say anything.
Jeremy glanced from one brother to the other, reading their expressions. Love, concern, worry on both faces, but neither spoke; neither tried to convince him one way or another.
But they cared.
Jeremy took a long deep breath and let it out slowly, then did it again. "It's s-scary. A-and I'm af-fraid. B-but it hasta be d-done, so I g-guess I'll d-do it. Just – just don't l-leave m-me."
Jason cleared his throat. "Never."
"Might be in the next room, with a wall between, but we'll be there."
Jeremy started gathering the dishes together.
Josh grabbed him by the elbow, and put Jeremy's other hand on his, "Promise."
Jason covered their joined hands with his.
Jeremy's troubled expression brightened.
One way or another, it would be alright.
They would be alright.
Always.