Resonance

by Guardinthena

When Optimus Prime faces termination on the battlefield, Phage makes a desperate gamble to turn the tables on the Decepticons. Her plans go awry when she's taken hostage by Megatron, who believes she has the Matrix. Despite Decepticon concepts of hospitality, Phage objects to the claim that she has the sacred relic. What she does have and will not say, is Optimus Prime's spark.

23. Resonance

Authors Note: Good day fellow readers. It has been a very long road but Resonance will be ending soon in the next chapter or two. The story has run its inevitable course, over forests and under oceans and back again to the Ark. It is time soon for me to put this book down and begin the next installment in this series. Before I do, I wanted to say how much all the love and support has meant to me over the years. When I set out to write Resonance, I had given up writing fanfiction for years prior and it was meant as a test in the waters if I should comeback. I was blown away by all the amazing lovely support and friends I have made along the way. Simply astounding! I was at an all time low in my own ability to write and everyone here helped so much to bolster my confidence and reaffirm my skill as a wordsmith. So thank you everyone! To anyone who was ever curious and clicked on Resonance, to everyone who ever favorited, followed and left reviews. It all meant so much more than you could have ever realized! Thank you all from the bottom of my heart!

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"This woman is my destiny."

Shut Up and Dance with Me

-Walk the Moon

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Filled with a restless energy, Phage-One found sleep to be an elusive beast.

Optimus's words haunted her long after she had retreated to her berth chamber. Scenario after scenario played out in her processor until it had whipped itself up into a whirlwind within her minds eye. To distract from such mind boggling notions of shadowy stage five civilizations and their literal discarded death star toys that younger civilizations regarded as gods-and wondering how such scenarios had become normal in her life- Phage-One decided to focus her energies on more productive pursuits she could handle. Namely, solving the Gordian Knot that was her love life by tried and true methods-slicing it in half.

When she had woken, Phage had been so grateful that Optimus Prime had not brought up the mess that was their relationship. She was grateful he had remained tactful and stoic. She, not so much.

Phage dragged her servos heavily across her face and wondered what was wrong with herself. Flirty foot tag with the Prime? Her attention drifted to the ceiling, wishing some divine power would save her from her own idiocrasy. Optimus Prime's avatar had warned her he could not filter everything given that they were timesharing headspace. He had not wanted her to know about their prior relationship, and Optimus Prime had been very formal and respectable when she had woken. Did he want her back? What was which? And then there was the Lamborghini Twins.

Thinking of them and their bickering, and Sunstreaker's coldness, and Sideswipe's enabling, and how could she forget how they had greeted her upon her return!- Sunstreaker demanding she change her newly reformatted appearance!- And then she dwelled on the notion that they weren't always bad. They had taught her some self defense tricks, Sunstreaker in particular taking great detail in how and where to hit a mech for the most damage, of which she had used with brutal efficiency on Megatron, and how comfortable she was when she was chilling in Sideswipe's embrace with a drink and a movie flick...

She came to the hard decision that the good times were not enough to outweigh all the bad in-between and the stress it brought on. Especially when just reflecting on the last six months threatened the onset of a cranium surge.

After serious deliberation she concluded that she had to call Sideswipe and break things off officially. Even though it appeared clear to her that he had already done so by failing to turn up for a visit, she felt she had to do the difficult deed the formal way and not leave matters up to what-ifs. Even if Optimus Prime remained stoically distant with her and never brought a word up about what had transpired within the mindscape, she had to end it with the Lamborghini Twins for her own sanity.

Before hailing Sideswipe over the commlink, Phage-One tried to map out a game plan of what she wanted to say. Her hypothetical confrontation kept alternating between anger over what felt like abandonment, and calm reason that she had been wanting a way out for awhile so why was she upset when she had been given a golden ticket and to approach the breakup levelly. And, of course, her processes drifted. Did the Lamborghini Twins even deserve a formal breakup notice? They had been a no show for three days. That was abandonment. They couldn't have cared about her all that much. Certainly they had no respect for her. Was that her fault? Had she messed up by being too kind? Too understanding? Too quick to experiment? On the other hand, why did she feel she owed them anything better? Why should she bother to visit or call them to officially break up when it was clear they had already done that? And then her conscious would kick in, her sense she had to be better and not stoop to their level, as much as she would have liked. As she struggled with how difficult the matter was, she also knew how stupid she had been despite knowing the risks of dating any mech. The dating game was not as clean cut as it had been when she was human. She couldn't drop an ex and never speak to them again or even have to see them again. Her dating pool was limited to less than a hundred. Half that was the enemy, and of the Autobot potential there was even less, once one accounted for maturity and taste. And if she had pursued a relationship, of which she had, she knew the risk that it wouldn't work, and if it didn't work out that she would have to see them and work with them every day. She had taken that risk. No one else. So then the matter came back around that she had to talk to Sideswipe at the very least, because he was more reasonable and level headed of the two, if simply to maintain peace around the Ark.

As her meandering thoughts closed their inevitable loop, Phage-One startled herself, as she came to realize she had begun pacing her berth chambers, at what point she wasn't sure, with both her servos clasped behind her back. She stopped immediately and examined her hands funnily, turning them this way and that. Not her habit to pace... Then, she shrugged the instance off and made a careless mental note to inform Ratchet at a later point of the ghost habit, then carried on with her personal business.

Having settled on her plan of attack to rip the bandage off, per se, and run, Phage-One plopped onto the edge of her berth and worked up the nerve to call Sideswipe on her newly integrated commlink. "Stay calm..." she whispered to herself, exhaling slowly as she waited for Sideswipe to answer the call. "Stay..."

It only rang once.

"Faye!" She was startled at the speed with which Sideswipe had picked up. The sight of his fresh face with his boyish charm and roguish smile scattered her plan right out of her head. "You're online!" His excitement abruptly gave way to suspicion that left her surprised. "Why ya callin' me, sweetspark?"

"Why am I...What do you mean why am I calling?" The enchantment that had once held her captive had lost its allure. His strange greeting immediately irked her. "Are you...not happy to see me?"

"Of course Sunny and I are happy to see you! We heard the operation was a success and you were recovering well."

"Sunstreaker's with you?" And on the commline, Sunstreaker's stoic visage swam into view behind Sideswipe. "Of course Sunstreaker's with you." She muttered and tried desperately to refrain from rolling her optics.

"Well hello to you too."

"Sorry. Question. Why didn't you come to visit?"

"Online and already on the defensive bitchy warpath." Remarked Sunstreaker. Phage-One's jaw immediately set, her mouth pulling downwards in a frown but prided herself that she managed to keep her cool and not rise to respond.

"Ah-hah." An awkward laugh spilled from Sideswipe's mouth as he tried to shrug off Sunstreaker's response. He wagged his digit in the air in a manner of someone who had something important to say and forgot, then wagged it at Sunstreaker over his shoulder strut. "I told you she was going to be mad."

"I am not upset, just...bewildered, I suppose." She said through tight denta. Then took a quick moment to recollect herself and said carefully, "Optimus Prime said you were pulling double guard duty and that kept you busy. But, you couldn't even send a get well soon card? Or a text?"

"Do you know how many dumb cards Sunny and I would have if we got one every time we were in Medbay?" She was left floundering for words at Sideswipe's dismissive remark, but she quickly forewent that when she picked up on some fidgety behavior from the red Lamborghini. "So, um...Optimus didn't say why we were pulling double guard duty?"

"I assumed it was because the Ark is on lockdown while everything is sorted out." She remarked carefully.

"Punishment." Sunstreaker chimed in abruptly and irritably.

"Oh! ...What did you do now?"

"Why is it we did something wrong?" Sunstreaker shot back. "Maybe it's Command out for us."

"Shut up." Hissed Sideswipe over his shoulder strut. "You damn well know why."

"Yeah. I'm pulling double guard duty because of her."

"Excuse me?" Chirped Phage, but her cry went unheard as the Lamborghini Twins began to bicker amongst themselves.

"You knew the risk when we became a throuple."

She heard Sunstreaker's engine rev over the commline, and then the entire stream tilted crazily. Somewhere in the background Sideswipe was shouting incoherently, and then the screen righted itself again on Sunstreaker's face alone. His icy optics struck a chord of fear within her, and she knew immediately that she had made the right call in comming Sideswipe rather than visiting them in person. "Remember why we were suppose to keep our relationship on the down low?"

"Let my arm go, you aft!" Snapped Sideswipe from the background. "You wanna talk to her comm her."

"Yes." Murmured Phage-One. "Because you were my bodyguards."

It was then that Sideswipe managed to yank his arm free of Sunstreaker's grasp. The vid careened crazily again, a blur of colors, bright sunlight, and then it righted itself on Sideswipe once again. He was glaring off screen at Sunstreaker as he said patiently to her, "Optimus has been pretty mad at us for, you know, being unprofessional."

She got a call from Sunstreaker on her commlink then that she reluctantly accepted. The screen split between their two faces as he immediately carried on the conversation with a scoff and scowl. "Mad at us? Try furious. It's been his whole mood. You should have seen him the first day he onlined. There was smoke pouring from his pipe stacks he was so fragging pissed. He was even snapping at Bumblebee. The Prime never snaps at Bumblebee."

"He deserved that for blabbing the way he did." Sideswipe said. "Can you imagine if 'Bee ran his mouth off like that over an open frequency and gave away vital intel to the 'Cons?"

"I didn't say he didn't deserve it. Just not often I see 'Bee get disciplined so harshly."

By that point, Phage-One's optics were comically wide listening to the brothers' exchange and was privately grateful she had been knocked out for days to have missed all the trouble. "Optimus didn't mention any of that."

"No?" Questioned Sideswipe.

"He only mentioned the meeting."

"Hah! Yeah. Where he chewed out everyone's afts." Sideswipe scoffed.

"He said there was discussion over my Creation Matrix." Linted Phage-One. That struck a chord with the Lamborghini Twins as they both quickly became demurred.

"Yeah." Responded Sideswipe with a lot less gusto. "That came after." She was just opening her mouth to ask what was wrong but Sideswipe kept talking. "Speaking of the Prime," he asked with a tinge of worry, "has he cooled off any?"

"He seemed fine to me." She said quietly, glancing toward her closed door. "He's busy right now decoding ancient Cybertronian."

"Huh." Said Sideswipe.

"Huh what?"

"Nothing. So, uh, why'd you call us again?"

"We don't need any further trouble." Grumbled Sunstreaker.

She hesitated a nanoklik in responding due to Sunstreaker's odd comment and took that moment to recompose herself. "I called to talk."

"What's there to talk about?" Asked Sideswipe with an unusual note of tension in his voice.

Her optical ridges slopped into the midst of her forehead. "Us. I thought we could meet up and-"

A derisive snort came from Sunstreaker. "I know your a hedonistic sprite like us, Phage, but damn. The Prime's not enough?"

"What?"

On the other side of the commline, Sideswipe was the picture of hard concentration. Finally, he said as an aside to his brother, "Sunny, I don't think she knows."

"Bullslag. She knew damn well what she was doing."

"What?" She parroted. Both the Badland Terrors stalled up then and stared at her with twin stunned expressions. An awkward moment passed between the three. Phage-One was quickest to recover and shook her cranium to chase out the crazy. "Is this one of your gags, Sides? I don't think it's funny."

"No!" His voice hit a high pitch. "You seriously-No!"

"Right."

Sideswipe's face pitched to alarm while Sunstreaker's took on a mischievous edge. "Faye, sweetspaa-err, damnit. Sorry! I'm so use to that. Phage...it is Phage, right? Or, ah...is it the Endurus? I'm a bit-Whatever!" He cut her off as she was opening her mouth to answer. "You remember the terms of our relationship. It was open. We don't give a slag who you got an itch to frag for the night. The only other term was that if you wanted to pursue a serious relationship with some other 'bot our casual fling was over."

"Not because we couldn't take on any mech for you." Added Sunstreaker.

"Nah. Not that. Because we could." Phage finally did roll her optics then at their over inflated egos. "We just don't want the drama."

"And you've become some serious drama." Added Sunstreaker.

"I'm the drama? Okay. Yeah. Sure." She snipped brusquely. At that moment she was starkly reminded of Rumble and Frenzy with the way that Sideswipe and Sunstreaker finished off each other's sentences. She felt the impending approach of a cranium surge setting in. She began rubbing her temple as she tried to wrap up the call. "So let me get this straight, you broke up with me, without telling me, as soon as I came back? Why?"

"Spires of Iacon." Sunstreaker murmured. "You really have no idea. -Yes! We're over." Phage stalled up hard then and stared at the Twins, feeling, at last, that something was terribly amiss. Or, that they were really invested in whatever prank they thought was worth the laugh at her expense.

Rather than get upset over their strange gag, she found the turn of events a relief. "Wonderful." She declared.

"Wonderful?" Echoed Sideswipe abruptly as a perplexed and hurt puppy dog optics settled across his visage.

"Yes. Wonderful. It sounds like this breakup is mutual-"

"Mutual?" Echoed Sideswipe.

"-which is great. I was hoping we could have zero drama in this for the crews sake."

"What do you mean mutual?" Demanded Sideswipe.

Apparently, insisting the breakup was mutual bruised the Lamborghini Twins over inflated egos. Apparently, she deduced, in their world nobody could break up with them, because they were the Badland Terrors. The only spark breakers could be themselves.

Phage-One sighed. "Yes. Mutual." She said slowly but firmly. "Look, bots, this shouldn't take this long. It seems we're both on the same page here." But the Twins seemed to have a stuck gear, judging by their displeased grimaces, and she began to wonder if they had held some fantasy notion of her begging to stay together. She decided to lay down the law. "Coming home, seeing how you greeted me after a traumatic ordeal, I've had time to reflect to put matters into perspective. This relationship we had can't go on."

"Wait." Clipped Sunstreaker as he grew increasingly irate. "You're breaking up with us over how we greeted you after a traumatic ordeal? Traumatic? I heard you had drinks with Megatron! Traumatic my aft, you ungrateful glitch. You know what happens if we get caught? Certainly we're not offered drinks."

Her mouth dropped open. Sideswipe was the textbook picture of horrified. "Excuse me?" Phage snapped.

"We have busted our afts off for two quartexs to protect you. We threw ourselves at Megatron himself so you could pull your slight of servo with the Matrix. That was all you needed to do. But no! You stole Optimus Prime's spark too! Our relationship was open, glitch. If you wanted to klank another mech we wouldn't have cared so long as we reclaimed you. But no, you went for all or nothing with the Prime. And for our dedication we get punished? Your breaking up with us because we were startled by your change in appearance? Frag you."

She bristled at the accusation. "You just said you broke up with me! When I got back! I suppose you came to this decision while I was in surgery? Real classy. You can't be mad at me either because you got in trouble. You both knew you ran the risk of upsetting Command when you pursued me. You said so yourself! You said how much of a thrill it gave you."

"You did, Sunny."

"Whose side are you on?"

"Why are there sides?" Sideswipe asked, startled.

"And-" insisted Phage-One, "Who belittles and demands their partner to change their appearance because they don't like something about them? What the hell, guys."

"Newsflash- no one likes the omni-hair." Insisted Sunstreaker.

"Shove off." Phage-One bit as her omni-hair rose up off her shoulder struts and began to coil and curl into an angry mass. Sunstreaker and Sideswipe mirrored grimaces of distaste at the sight of it.

"I did like your synthetic hair better." Sideswipe remarked meekly. "That stuff just gives me the cringe."

"You know what." Phage-One said abruptly. "I have a question."

"What question?" Sideswipe asked with a measure of suspicion.

She paused a moment in contemplation, wondering if she really needed the answer to the question at all. She decided she did if for nothing else than to further learn from this wild, passionate but ultimately doomed romance. "Humor me."

"Humor you?"

"What do you like about me?"

Sunstreaker and Sideswipe stared at her, quiet and mirroring twin frowns and glanced nervously at each other. It was Sideswipe who broke the social discomfort by asking his own question rather than answering; "What? Where is that coming from?"

Her composure stiffened. "Bots, come on now. What do you even like about me that your arguing with me over ending our relationship?"

"Whose arguing?" Sideswipe snapped. "It's already over."

"I knew that."

"What did you expect?" Sideswipe snapped, exasperated.

"Can you please answer the question?"

Even through the commlink, Phage could tell the Badland Terrors were uncomfortable. "Why are you putting us on the spot?" Sideswipe shot back.

The longer they avoided the question the further irate she became. How did she waste six months with them? Her composure grew solid, her refined features stiffening into stone. She would not be deterred by Sideswipe's pathetic attempts at deflection. "What do you like about me?" She persisted, her voice dipping into the smooth, rich vocals that preceded Phage-One's slip into her Pandora Endurus persona. "It is a simple question."

Sideswipe and Sunstreaker were woefully unaware of the slip. "Is this a trick question?"

"Why would it be- Ugh! Sideswipe, please. I just want to know. Why is the question so hard to answer? Did I mean nothing? Was I only a frag buddy?"

"Yes." Snarked Sunstreaker. Her mouth dropped open again, her optics doubling in size, but smoothed over when Sideswipe immediately shoved his brother so hard that his face careened off screen as the mech stumbled off balance. Over the commlines she heard a scuffle, and Sunstreaker started to shout colorful expletives that Sideswipe ignored.

"No, Faye!" Sideswipe cried desperately into the commlink. "Don't listen to Sunny. You know how he is. You weren't just a free downloader, not to me."

"Then, what did you like about me?"

"Your...body?" Answered Sideswipe lamely. Phage-One stared and waited, expectant and growing further upset as the wait carried on, already angry that his first suggestion was her body and, by all accounts, nothing more and nothing less. Not her intellect, not her smile or beauty, not her laugh, not her humor or...anything. Anything at all. But none was forthcoming. Her frame slumped as reality set in. As much as Sideswipe wanted to be opposite his brother, Sunstreaker had spoken the harsh truth.

When the silence between the three had carried on too long, Phage-One grimaced, her denta flashing, and closed her optics in a quiet bid at calm and patience. Her displeasure made Sideswipe nervous. "Come on, Faye. You can't out us on the spot like that." She opened her optics and focused on Sideswipe. "What do you like about us?"

"What do I like about you?"

"Yeah." Said Sideswipe smartly. "It's not that easy to come up with reasons on the spot now is it?" He said, smug with himself as if he had played some masterful uno reverse card.

Phage was...done. So over the whole call. Them. Everything. And out of spite, to wipe the smug look off his face, she answered quick as lightning. "I had liked your smile, Sides. I had enjoyed your humor and infectious laughter. I enjoyed how comfortable and secure I felt around you. When we were together, I could forget for just a little while all the worries that were hanging just overhead. I could have fun for a change. I could go on, but I believe I have made my point. You shouldn't need time to ponder over what you like about someone. It should be innate. Maybe remember that for whoever you meet next time." The Lamborghini Twins yet again became mirror masks of one another, sullen and frowning at her. Phage-One frowned back. "That you can't tell me a single thing you like about me tells me all I need to know."

"I did!" Sideswipe protested. "Your body!"

"Tch."

"This is so disingenuous when its forced."

"Really?" Phage-One snapped at Sunstreaker. "Disingenuous? Forced? When have you ever complimented me?"

"You shouldn't expect it. We were with you, weren't we? That should have said it all. It's rather sad actually that the Primeling is fishing for compliments, right 'Sides?"

Once again another horrified look passed across Sideswipe's face as he glanced hurriedly between the tick going off underneath Phage-One's right optic and Sunstreaker. "Don't drag me into this."

"You're already involved in this."

"No." Phage-One adamantly interrupted with absolute finality. "I said I cannot keep doing this. The constant bickering...I can't."

"Yeah." Clicked Sunstreaker. "We know. Don't know why you bothered to call and harass us about it."

When her face crumpled in bafflement again over the odd comment, worry crossed Sideswipe's visage and he said gently, "Faye-err, Phage. Sweet-ah, err. Phage. I, uh, I think you need to talk to Optimus. Or Ratchet? You seem... uh, really confused on some very important matter."

"This again?"

Sideswipe gaped at her a moment then jerked his cranium to clear the hang-up and said quickly, "It's not a joke. I swear. Ask them about the resonance."

"The resonance?"

"You kept it. Obviously. Ask him about that. See ya around, sweetspark."

"Wa-" Wait, was what she had been about to say, but the Lamborghini Twins cut the connection and left her staring at a black screen. She blinked owlishly at the commlink, wondering what the blazes she was missing. The resonance? Between her and Optimus? Sideswipe had been nervous the whole call, and Sunstreaker had said he didn't want any further trouble...

"That has got to be one of the strangest break ups calls on record... I can't believe I wasted so much time on them! ...No, no it's okay." She said to herself as she carded her digits through her omni-hair. "It's a learning experience. It's okay. You're more or less immortal now. What's six months?"

Phage exhaled slowly to try to rid the tension from her frame. When that didn't work she stood and went for her private washrack off of her berth chambers to cleanse her face and wash away the stress. "Well, at least that's a load off my back. Not as smooth as I had hoped but it is what it is..." Her olfactory crinkled as she felt out her own feelings about the breakup. There was no remorse. No regret. Just immediate relief. She smiled and quietly sang to herself as she sauntered into her personal washracks, "Freeedom-"

Kang!

"-Oof!"

She blinked and glanced down at herself and quickly realized she had banged a part of her new alt against the doorframe. Exasperated, Phage flung her cranium back and sighed. Inhaling sharply, she adjusted her movement to enter her private washracks without further incident. "Here we go again." She grimaced ruefully. "Weeks of banging on doors and walls as I adjust for the new spatial awareness. Great."

When she entered into her private washracks, Phage-One came to a sudden halt in front of her mirror, gobsmacked by the face that stared back. As abruptly as she had stalled she leaned forward and carefully touched her face, turning her cranium this way and that as she noted the bright freedom red lips, the rust-gold optic-shadow, gold outlined eyelashes, and traced the new lines running from her cheekbone to her chin.

She recognized the face. The beauty. The strength and the stubborn will behind the curious blue optics with the unique green inner ring. The only thing off was the optic hue-it should have been green. "Pandora Endurus." She breathed, startled by the change the reformate had caused. And then she jerked back from the mirror to spin around to note the rest of her frame's changes. What she had thought were door wings in the midst of the hectic firefight were actually the front left and right sides of a car, with the central part compacted on her back and the lower half broken into flaring hip guards. In no way was her alt mode integrated into her limbs or chassis, such as with Optimus Prime. "Shell transformation. Hm." She smiled, and then twisted on her heel to admire her frame's profile and smiled approvingly.

Whilst admiring her reformatted frame, she became aware of a set of voices drifting from her living quarters. She stalled up, staring at her reflection in the mirror without seeing as she listened intently. Definitely two voices, she decided but she was too far away to hear specifics. Curiosity getting the best of her, Phage-One immediately slunk into a rogue's stance and partial phased. Green arching ribbons sparked across the air around her frame, then fizzled out as she slipped through the washrack wall and drifted towards her berth chambers door, all without a sound. Half phased between the fabric of reality as she was, she saw a level of reality few ever could. She could see the energy coursing through the Ark walls, more vibrant than she remembered, but more immediately was the three energy-ridden mechs occupying her living quarters. She quickly identified Optimus Prime sitting on her couch. The other two were standing in the midst of her quarters, and judging by the shape of their frames she took an educated guess that it was Ratchet and Wheeljack. She strained her audios to detect the voices, and though whisper quiet, the conversation grew more distinct until she could pick out that Optimus and Ratchet were talking to each other and what they were discussing. Smiling slyly to herself, Phage-One drifted towards the wall dividing the separate rooms and carefully placed her audio against it...

"You said she was awake."

"She excused herself. I believe I overwhelmed her."

"What did you tell her?"

"I didn't think it was much."

"You told her about the mass miracle, didn't you?"

"Most of it."

"Most of it? Dare I guess what part you left out, Prime?"

Left out?, Phage-One mouthed curiously.

"The conversation branched into what was discussed at the meeting." Optimus responded carelessly.

"The meeting? You mean Skids and Bluestreak's theories?"

"Which led into a discussion about Primus theology. She needed rest after that."

"Oh, pitt, Prime. Why did you discuss that? The whole religion is a convoluted mess."

"I thought it necessary, Ratchet."

Ratchet groaned then. "Did she at least tell you what designation she is going to go by now so I can pass that along?"

"We...glazed over that. But it seems to me-". Optimus Prime's attention suddenly snapped to the wall half a nanoklik before a green shimmer rippled against the wall and through the air. And then a familiar face poked itself out of the solid structure.

"Phage-One is fine, Ratchet."

Ratchet cursed in Cybertronian and jumped about a mile high as Phage-One phased through the wall of her berth chambers and entered into the main living area. Wheeljack too startled badly at her sudden and abrupt appearance and had his weapons halfway drawn from subspace before he registered who she was. The mechs quickly settled but their tempers remained ruffled. Meanwhile, Optimus Prime shot her a critical glare at her choice of designation.

"Damn it, Phage!" Wheeljack growled, his engine revving angrily as he put his weapons away. "Don't do that! You're going to get your cranium blown off!"

A mischievous smirk tugged at the corner of her mouth. "How when I'm partially phased, Jackie?"

"You smartaft." He complained.

"Phage-One." Intoned Optimus Prime in such a way that implied he was wagging a digit at her for her naughty behavior. "I thought you were off to recharge."

"I couldn't sleep."

"I see that." He said simply.

"Good you're awake." Groused Ratchet. "I can finally assess your mental health after the Disentanglement procedure."

That gave her a moments pause as she shot Ratchet a deer-in-the-headlights glance. The moment quickly passed. "Can I say something before we start."

"Sure." Drawled Ratchet curiously.

Phage-One motioned to her frame. "I finally got a look at myself and-has anyone actually seen me? I am one hot femme." Ratchet rolled his optics as Phage went off. "Y'all can take your fear of tentacles and shove off."

"I'll make a note that you have opted-out of cosmetic surgery." And Ratchet mimed crossing out a non-existent order form.

"Are you absolutely sure?" Asked Wheeljack.

She deadpan glared and pointed at her omni-hair. "You see this? I realized I can manipulate them individually when I concentrate. I never have to deal with knots or lift a hand to braid my hair again. They're staying."

Wheeljack started chuckling and Ratchet rolled his optics a second time. Optimus Prime was a silent bystander to the whole affair whilst he sat on her couch with his holopad in his large blue servo, staring at her intently.

"Hm." Huffed Ratchet. "Seems your egos intact. Let me try and fix that. Have you tried transforming yet?"

All the confidence went right out of her as the same deer-in-the-headlights look came over her again. "No."

"Thought so."

Wheeljack leaned around Ratchet's frame to comment, "Once you do you'll never want to go back. Best thing in the world. Nothing but open roads around here and of course there's the dunes at the back of the mountain. High speeds and the wind-you'll never want to transform back."

"Some mechs prefer one form over the other." Ratchet elaborated with a clinical air. "We'll have to set time aside to get you out there for a trial run."

Her cheeks tinted a blue hue. "Ah."

Ratchet shot her a look from under his helm as he made notes on his datapad. "You'll be fine. You were nervous about your size displacement drive too but you got over that."

"Right."

"You'll be fine." Ratchet insisted. "You have a shell transformation."

"The simplest of transformations." Chimed in Wheeljack. "Your alt just snaps around you. Easy for repairs when-"

"She knows." Sighed Ratchet. "Transformation types were one of the first subjects we covered when she began shadowing me."

"Oh. Sorry."

Ratchet shot Wheeljack a critical glare. "It's me we're talking about. Do you think I would fail to cover the most basic of topics, or any subject, in anything less than perfect detail?"

"Save me." Said Wheeljack.

"I'm in the same boat as you." Phage-One quickly quipped back.

"If you're both so ungrateful for my reputable tutelage..."

Before Ratchet could finish, Wheeljack slapped his backside hard enough to knock Ratchet forward a step. "I'm just joking. Lighten up, Sunshine."

Instead, Ratchet's engine quietly revved as he straightened up and got right back to business. "As for the reason of this visit." He overtly emphasized to reign in control of the conversation, "Phage-One is it then? Not Pandora Endurus?"

"No." Said Phage-One, though she straightened up at the title and Optimus's attention laser focused on her once again. "I...don't know how to explain it..."

"She's slipping between the two." Optimus cut in suddenly. "Ratchet was asking about your designation before you entered. I was about to explain that I had noticed you were shifting between the two identities." His optics locked with Phage's. "Bluestreak was right. You need to gain Attunement through your Manifold Nexus."

"Um. How is that suppose to work?" Asked Wheeljack. "Earth doesn't have what she needs... Does it?"

Optimus's attention dropped back to the ancient holopad in his servo. He absently remarked offhand, "What she needs is confidence."

"Is that all?" Spluttered Phage-One.

"Hm. Mostly." Concurred Optimus nonplussed and remarked carelessly. "Silverbolt was the same way. Putting him in charge of the Aerialbots took his mind off his insecurities." There was a sudden silence that befell the group. Optimus looked up from his translations and blinked owlishly around at the company. His attention fell lastly on Phage-One and seemed at last to register what he perceived he forgot to mention. "Ah. I will help get you there."

"I'll leave you two to figure that out." Ratchet cut in. "Phage. Now that you're online, have you been experiencing any ill effects from the Disentanglement?"

"No."

He cocked an optical ridge at her. "No ghost recall memories, habits, cranium surges...?"

She shook her cranium. "No. Oh! Oh, yes." The mechs attention snapped up on her. "I was just pacing like Op."

"Habit recall?" Mused Ratchet. "Doesn't seem too bad. If you have any more, a lot more, as in, every other thing you're doing is a Prime habit-sorry for the pun- then let me know right away. You have my personal number and Optimus Prime is here too if anything should go wrong. Speaking of, Prime, same question. Prime. ...Optimus?"

"Hm?"

"Same question."

"What question?"

A quirk of a smile twisted the corner of Ratchet's mouth. "How good is that holopad, Prime?"

"Exceedingly fascinating."

"He's working on translations." Supplied Phage-One with a fond smile.

"Old Codex?" Inquired Ratchet. When Optimus gave a grunt of a reply Ratchet was quick to say, "Don't strain your processor. You're suppose to be resting."

"It's been an Earth week. I'm fine."

"You're on medical leave for a quartex till otherwise. Rest."

"I am resting." Objected Optimus Prime. "This is the holopad I've been ripping the Ark apart to find, Ratchet."

"Aha! Is that the legendary elusive holopad I kept hearing about? And where was it? Last place you left it?"

Optimus shot him a glare over the top of the holopad. "Phage-One had it in her subspace pocket."

Both Ratchet and Wheeljack burst into laughter. In that moment Phage-One realized the holopad matter had been a bigger issue than she had realized and smiled ruefully at her unwitting role in the dilemma. "Why?" Asked Ratchet when his laughter had calmed.

"Cultural integration studies." Answered Phage-One.

"I thought I had loaned you a copy of the Covenant of Primus. Not this. I can hardly believe I made that kind of mistake." Ratchet shifted his weight.

"I can hardly believe you casually loaned me a holopad that was elven million years old!"

"I still cannot wrap my processor around the notion you were going to smack Rumble in the face with it."

"Wait." Spluttered Wheeljack between a burst of sudden laughter. "You were going to smack Rumble with a holy text?"

"Yes."

"That is some of the funniest slag I've heard all week. I don't think that mech has ever stepped a pede inside a holy place."

"Well you both seem to be fine." Interrupted Ratchet. "If anything changes let me know straight away. And Phage, here, take one of these with a glass of energon once a day." She pulled a face at the mention of energon and further as Ratchet handed her a bottle of capsules. "Don't give me that look. It's for your nightmares. You've been getting good recharge right?"

"Yes...except this morning-"

"I was held up getting here this morning and couldn't administer it too you on time. So. Take them this time." He insisted.

"Yes, Ratchet."

"You better. I can already tell you're functioning much better."

"You can?"

"Your optics."

"Ah."

"And you're in a much better mood. Recharge deprivation is a real thing. Remember that."

"Yes, Ratchet." She replied sheepishly.

"And before I leave, shall I discuss Blocks and how they work?"

The topic of Blocks finally snagged Optimus Prime's attention. A note of urgency flashed across his optics. "Phage-One and I still need to discuss our resonance."

Ratchet gaped at Prime as Phage-One perked up at the topic, her omni-hair coiling into the air to match her curiosity. "That wasn't the first thing you two discussed?"

"There is much we have to cover." Optimus snapped back defensively while Phage stared on in bewilderment between the three.

Ratchet glanced between the two and smirked. "Would you like me to stay and explain-"

"Get out."

Phage's optics went wide at the resolute, commanding tone the Prime took and became baffled by Ratchet and Wheeljack's sudden laughing and prodding behavior.

"Whatever you decide let me know." Ratchet insisted as he and Wheeljack began to exit her quarters. "I am a call away if I need to set up for a severance procedure or grab the Blocks. Or, you know, explain how gears and toggles work."

"Get. Out."

"Prime, yes sir."

As they made a quick exit and a few moments after, Phage-One stared after the mechs with a baffled glare. The Prime shifted on her couch and suddenly and sharply questioned; "Phage-One?" She slowly turned her cranium around. Her strange azure optics with the green iris rings stared back at him with a guarded intensity. "How long do you think you can skirt responsibility, Endurus?"

"I told you before it was an empty designation devoid of any power or authority here on Earth."

"Not here. Not among us." As Phage-One cast him a baffled expression at the remark, Optimus Prime was suddenly overcome by a swell of stress. He scrubbed the half of his visible face with his right blue servo. She heard him muttering to himself, "Too much. Too much to discuss."

She did not want to get into an argument with Prime over her designation and so attempted to stir the conversation in a different direction. "Optimus? ...Did Ratchet just reference Cybertron's version of the 'birds and the bees'?"

"Yes." He bemoaned.

Her suspicions turned to curiosity. "Why...?"

Still seated on her couch, Optimus straightened up. He cast his optics to the ceiling overhead and rubbed the back of his neck. Seemingly quite content to throw himself into what must have been an easier topic than the previous one, he answered willfully; "We...need to talk about the resonance."

"I thought we already discussed the resonance."

"Scattered quick snippets is hardly sufficient for something of such life altering magnitude." She waited on him to continue with large optics and abated breath. As with everything else in his life, Optimus Prime seized the initiative. "I...find this odd that I have to explain this, but given you aren't Cybertronian forged or, in your situation, fully aware of our customs..." He trailed off, suddenly tongue-tied and, she realized as he began fidgeting with the holopad in his servos, embarrassed.

"Optimus." Phage-One said quietly and patiently. "Just say what you need too."

"..."

"Optimus?"

"You... hmm, Me...errr, Us..."

"Is this one of those conversations you've had days to consider but can't figure out how to say it?"

"Yes." Optimus said sheepishly. Quiet pondering ensued, and then Optimus stood up. "I need to be blunt. You merged our sparks on the battlefield, Phage. We now share a bond that only termination or Ratchet's medical tools could sever or dampen."

"Yes. So I've heard."

Optimus stared at her, quiet frustration seeping into his optics. Abruptly, Optimus retracted his battlemask and she was once again taken aback by his strong, handsome face and instantly enchanted as his lips moved to form words. "Phage-One," he began formally, "we are sparkmated."

She stared back, at a loss on the significance of the word or its implications. Optimus's frustrations only grew compounded.

"Spark...mated." She said slowly, stubbornly willing disbelief. "Mated." She reiterated. "That is what you said."

"Yes."

Her optical ridges knitted together in polite stubbornness. "Is that the closest word you could find in the English language to translate from some Cybertronian word? Because I'm not sure you fully realize what that word means."

His frustration levels peaked. "I am fully aware of what the word 'mate' means, Phage."

"Good!" She chirped back. "Sometimes you 'Bots get funny ideas in your heads and, well... I'm trying to make sure we're both on the same page here. There, ah... Is there some strange Cybertronian definition of the word I am not aware of?"

Optimus forced a rush of air through his vents. "Sparkmated means how it sounds, Phage."

"Ah!" Was all she managed to say then. Optimus noted worriedly that she had become tense. She drew in a sharp breath and held it. Her optics were wide and round and waiting on him to continue where the strange conversation was going. He knew she knew where it was going and guessed she was playing clueless to avoid embarrassment in the case it wasn't what she assumed it was. Which it was.

With a simple exhale, Optimus gradually eased the tension out of his frame and said gently, "Can I show you what that means?"

"Show me?" She asked too quickly and too sharply. "Show me what?"

"You trust me?"

"Of course." She laughed lightly at the notion.

"Then, can I show you what it means to be sparkmated so you have an understanding? The bond that's been created?"

"Well, yes." She said carefully. "You would have to anyway when you utilize the bond to help me to channel-Oh!" She gasped as a warm loving presence bloomed within her chassis, a sensation she could only liken to the welcoming rays of sunlight on a cool summer day. It was a second sun housed within her chassis that reminded her of Optimus Prime's city sphere within the mindscape, of the fiery Cybertronian script coded sky and every time his avatar burned in and out of existence. Phage-One stood transfixed, amazed, as she took the time to fully experience the moment. As she took the time to examine the new yet delightfully strange sensation and familiarize herself with it, she found it seemed to prod back with a wonderfully sunny pulse. She startled then, her hand flying to cover her mouth. Her optics flew up from her chassis and found Optimus Prime. "It's...you."

"It's me."

She inexplicably did not know how to move her hands. Phage-One fanned the air, moved to card her digits through her wild mess of omni-hair, changed her mind and shoved them on her hip plates. All the while she could not stand still and found any place better to look other than at Optimus Prime. "Does that..." she struggled to ask, gesturing madly at her chassis, "Does that wane over time? You know. That we don't... that our sparks are separated?"

"No, Phage. It does not." He answered patiently, and was somewhat amused as well as worried by her reaction.

She bit her bottom lip. "Can you Sense me?"

"I have Sensed you from the moment I onlined." He smiled softly in the hope of easing her shock. "You were calm until you onlined."

Her cheeks tinged blue. "Why didn't I Sense you before?"

"I have been sparkbonded before, Phage-One."

She picked up on the unspoken portion that he knew, from experience, how to project his self and how to hold back. A stark frightened expression clouded her face then and, through the resonance bond, Optimus felt a sudden spike of anxiety from her the moment he saw pieces clicking together for her. She finally asked, "Did I... Are we married?"

"I believe that is Earth's crude equivalency of the concept." That pool of anxiety he had felt before pitched to a sudden spike of fear. He dreaded the worst as she stood frozen, the shock hitting her hard. "Phage?"

"That explains..." her mouth dropped open as everything tumbled together. "Everyone was so shocked when I told them what I... Oh my god! What did I..." she rambled and trailed off as she began chewing her bottom lip and reached for her omni-hair to stroke between her slim servos to calm her rattled nerves.

"Breath." Optimus insisted gently. She stepped away from him and motioned for him to give her a moment. Optimus remained rooted to his position, worry etched deep in his expression as she took a few moments to cycle air in and out of her systems and collect herself. "Just breath. Focus on that. ...I know you get anxiety over romantic commitment, that's why I didn't tell you earlier, but this does not have to be as bad as you fear it is."

In reply, she nodded promptly that she understood, no words spoken.

When she had collected herself she turned back to Optimus, one slim servo on her forehead. He was proud of her that she managed to get ahold of her emotions relatively quickly. With optics terribly wide, she looked up at him sharply and asked briskly, "We can sever it. Right?"

The warm sunny sensation dimmed within her breast the same moment that a wave of hurt washed over Optimus Prime's exposed face. She desperately did not want it too. She had not felt such a warmth in her soul in ages, but could not allow such a silly selfish notion to cloud her reasoning when she felt she had greatly harmed Optimus Prime by her reckless actions on the battlefield.

"You...want us to sever the resonance?"

The hurt puppy dog optics on Optimus Prime threw her for a complete loop. She stammered and fidgeted about. "Well, I..." His reaction had her confounded. "Haven't I transgressed terribly against you? Wouldn't you want it severed?"

"Transgressed terribly...? You saved my life, Phage."

"But, I forced married us. Our souls." Saying what she had actually done brought on a wave of lightheadedness. Optimus started for her, but she steadied herself against a wall.

"Should I comm Ratchet?"

"No. No! Just give me a moment. Bit of shock." She scrubbed her face once, hard, with her servo before saying, "Why are you just now telling me this? Why? You're not mad about that but upset that I suggest we sever the resonance? That's backwards."

"You want me to be mad at you?"

"Yes! No! I don't know! I thought we were going to after we used it as a tool to help train me then sever it."

"Is that what we agreed to do?" Asked Prime sullenly. "We did come to that decision in haste, didn't we?"

In haste?, flirted her scattered thoughts. "...Op? You didn't tell me then what it really was. I didn't...I didn't know. I was trying to save you. ...Op?"

"I know." He said stiffly and abruptly began pacing.

Phage-One watched him intensely as he paced her quarters with his servos clasped behind his back. "Optimus?" She called lightly after him. "What's the point of telling me what a resonance really is?"

"If not me, then you would have learned the truth from somewhere else, Ratchet most like, when you resumed your studies. Then what? We would be where we are now, only you would likely be angry I withheld the truth. And why would I do that?" He stopped pacing abruptly and faced her. "Did any of it matter?"

"Did...what matter?"

"Anything of what we...what we talked about Phage."

"Do you mean...back at the Decepticon base? In the mindscape?"

"Of course I do."

"I could ask you the same. You were all flowery and sweet-"

"I was trapped in your head. I couldn't filter everything."

She pushed off the wall and approached him. "I know that. But you don't have to filter anything with me." He looked up at her sharply. "You don't have to put up walls around me. You never had too. You don't have to be distant or reserved. You can be you with me. I have never cared about titles or positions. At the end of the day we are all free thinking people who bleed all the same." She stopped a small space from him with only the coffee table dividing them. She took a moment, a breath, and asked, "Was anything of what you said true?"

"Of course it was. You know it was. And you say I can be open with you, but you just said you want the resonance severed."

"That's what we talked about on the way back!"

His presence within her breast flared. Angry, frustrated, it was hard for her to discern. "I should have never said that."

"What!" She exclaimed with an aura of exasperation. "What is it that you want?"

"I do not have the luxury of wants." He remarked angrily.

"You are in here, Optimus. Not out there. In here you are just Optimus to me. So tell me, what is it you want."

But the Prime had spun sharply away and paced towards the door and then back to her and stopped just opposite of the coffee table. His countenance matched a churning storm that was contemplating if it should break open the rain or dissipate. "What are your intentions with the Twins? Are you going to reconcile with them?"

"Reconcile?" She spluttered. "No."

"No?"

"No." A burst of cathartic laughter spilled unbidden from her. "I only wanted closure with them so things wouldn't become too awkward around here. I al-"

He nodded smartly as he came to some immediate decision. "And us?"

"Us?" She echoed throatily.

"Yes. Us." Optimus declared and yet Phage-One had become the picture of surprise. "I thought I made that clear before. I want you back. I always held out hope we would find each other again. The last week was nothing how I imagined it would happen, and I certainly did not think we would be resonated before I could ask you out for an evening, but it has and did. So here I am, laying out my spark too you in more ways than one. Will you give us another chance?"

"Another chance?" She breathed, feeling just as lightheaded as before.

"Yes."

"Optimus, how can I give us another chance when I have no memory of us from before. Not a shred." His shoulders began to sink and Phage scrambled to recover, battling through the shock, and said slyly; "I can only give you a first chance."

Optimus perked up. "I can accept second first chances."

She smiled coyly and, from the stress and positive change in the conversation, tittered, but a nagging cloud soon settled over her her temple. "There is something I don't understand."

"What is that?"

"The why."

"Why what?"

"Why you even want me."

"Why?" Optimus breathed as his optics flared and doubled in size. "Alo Ata, you are my guiding star in the dark." Her breath hitched and her optics grew wide and bright. The wound from Sideswipe was still so fresh that Optimus's surefire response left her stunned. Never could she have imagined being dumped and then picked up and married within half an hour of each other. The whole series of events left her head spinning as Optimus carried on spilling his spark out to her. "I was lost when I crashed the Ark to end the War, and I was lost when my Autobots and I were reactivated. But there was you at every turn. A spark in the dark leading the way. Illuminating my path enough for me to find my pedes. I have stumbled along but I have kept my pace. And when I became mired, there you were, with a stubbornness to match my own and a passion to get me moving again."

So humbled by Optimus Prime's admission, the volume of Phage-One's voice eked itself out of her vocal processor in a small, wonderous tone and with a rueful smile, remarked; "All Witwicky's are stubborn."

Optimus snorted, only all too aware of the truth of the words. But then fixed her with a sudden intense look. "So am I. Which is why we have friction, but I need that. I need someone who can stand pede to pede with me and put me in my place when I need it. I need someone to remind me what is morally right when I stray from the road. You do that. You were never afraid too. And I need someone who I can confide in without judgement and someone who matches my drive and passion to the Autobot's and the betterment of Cybertronian kind. That's you. You want peace but will not tolerate a devastating compromise to achieve that. You craft and create for the betterment of our lives, you heal to keep us functioning..." He smiled ruefully. "My servos are only for war."

"That's not entirely true, Op. They are also for masterfully written works, too."

A cathartic laugh burst from his throat and when it passed he smiled shyly. "Yes. And that too." The soft tender moment was marred when Optimus found her face pinch with a troublesome thought. He knew then that some particular piece of his heartfelt ramble had not jived with her. "Was it something I said?"

"You've loved me since we met?"

"No! No! It happened so much later. Completely unintentionally. I was grateful for your assistance to our cause, and then we became something more. You approached me, Phage. I was shocked and confused and I was going to reject you at the first." Her optics widened at the admission and Optimus scrambled to recover. "But...I had a moment of weakness. No, that's not... What I mean is-Ahug." Air rushed from his vents in frustration. "We were both hurt and battered."

The glimmer that had sparked in her optics before began to die. "A moment of weakness...?" She echoed.

"No, it-I am butchering this." He growled at himself and pinched his optics closed. "-Spires." He grumbled. "I should have written it down." The Prime paced once and tried to start over. Something in his frustration eased her spark. "We were good friends."

"This was after my engagement to Blackrock, correct? I asked you if we could become friends with benefits."

"Well...yes." Optimus admitted bluntly. "That's how it started. It's not the most romantic beginning, I know. At the time, I wasn't looking to replace Alita and you swore off committed romantic partners after what Blackrock had done. We discussed it over and matters just, fell into place for us. -But it didn't stay that way between us."

"Clearly, no. That's why we had that fight. You fell in love with me, despite your grief over loosing Alita?"

"We fell in love with each other." He corrected gently. "We understood each others trauma's and treated each other with patience, kindness and respect."

Her smile was brittle and her optics glistened wet. "That kind of love sounds like a faery tale."

"No. No, it's not, Phage. We had that."

"I'm still waiting on the end." She strained through a tight throat.

"You know how that chapter closed, but our story never ended. Our roads only diverged for a time but they have come to a junction yet again."

Her slim optical ridges knotted politely together. "Optimus...I don't remember any bit of this."

"I know. I know you don't... Vector Sigma." He snapped under the stress. "Why didn't I share the memories when we were merged?" The Prime quietly berated himself. He looked back at her then, pondering, noted the worry lines on her face and an idea struck him then.

"Optimus. There is something I need to tell you."

"Wait. Wait a nanoklik." He said abruptly, "I would like to use my second first chance."

She could not suppress the quirk of a smile. "So soon? If you insist."

Optimus Prime straightened and mustered up an air of formality. "Phage-One."

"Yes, Optimus Prime?" She replied with a lopsided grin.

"There is something important I need to say."

"Oh?" She remarked playfully.

"What you did, running onto the battlefield to save me. Standing against Megatron and all the Decepticon forces, throwing yourself repeatedly in the way to preserve me...no one, and I mean no one, has ever done what you have done."

"I am sure they have." She said wispily. "Ratchet. Ironhide. Bumblebee-"

"No." Optimus said sharply as he took a step around the table towards her. His servos cut through the air as he carried on saying; "No one interferes in the fights between Megatron and I. No one. No one with an ounce of self preservation pits themselves so squarely in the midst of our conflicts as to stand against Megatron and not just have the courage to defy him, but the intellect to deceive him." He paused halfway to her and gestured towards her. "But you, Phage-One, did. All without a weapon, transformation cog, alt mode or military upgrades."

"And I would gladly do so again, even knowing what I know now." She said in a rush, weary of how tight her throat was becoming and distrusting it not to betray her if she did not talk fast.

Optimus licked his dry lips. "And you would gladly do so again." He murmured, wonder writ across his face. "Sparks like yours only come around once in a generation."

"What are you saying?" She asked with a tight throat.

"Et endura eyoto entu cyturn, Alo Ata." Through the resonance, Phage-One was overwhelmed by the storm of Optimus Prime's unrequited love he had nursed since losing her to the Lazalt. Her bottom lip quivered, her body fidgeted in anxious half realized motions as she tried to process all the new sensations and mire herself in that precious moment in time. Finally, Phage-One blinked slowly, optics watering over. As she translated the words from Autobot to English her voice cracked.

"You endure for me eternally."

"I believe humans simply say, I love you. Forever. Hm...It does not quite have the same flare when it is translated, does it?"

The short laugh that burst from her lips was wet. "Optimus..." She began shakily, but he interrupted her.

"Let me finish, Phage, before I lose my nerve." She choked on another little laugh at the ridiculous insinuation of the mighty Optimus Prime loosing nerve, but she knew love to be a unique battle all of its own. "When I first reactivated on this world, your face was the first face my optics graced. Many Earth years later, my face was the first face your optics glimpsed. Little did I realize then how destined that was. ...You are my guiding star in dark times, Alo Ata. Your acts of heroism have impressed me and I am honored that you would go through such trials to save me. So I ask, please, when you have settled your affairs with Sideswipe, I would be a lucky mech if you would give us another chance rather than so recklessly discard our history and the sparkbond that has formed between us."

Her optics swam with unshed tears. "Optimus, I've been trying to tell you. I already settled my affairs with 'em."

He blinked languidly, stunned by her admission. "You...have?"

She nodded once. "I just got off the commlink with Sideswipe before I came out here. He was..." she drawled, "civil about the whole thing and, honestly, his panic makes so much more sense in retrospect now that I realize what the resonation means..." She laughed suddenly at the whole situation because if she did not she thought she might just cry. "Poor Sideswipe! I would panic too if my ex became the Prime's wife and she called me up and had no clue... That is such a strange sentence, isn't it?"

"Perhaps just a little." He smiled softly.

The serendipitous moment hung between them with such fragility. Ever so carefully, Optimus reached out and held his servo palm up. Phage-One glanced from his open servo and back to his face. Gently, she placed her much slimmer white and teal servo in his vibrant navy blue. Optimus smiled and closed his digits around hers.

"Optimus..." Phage-One said softly, "I want to give us another chance." His servo tightened around hers. "You are the warm sunlight that I miss in the dark caverns I've thrown myself in."

The luminescence of his optics shown bright. "Then do." He gently cradled her face in his other servo. She leaned into the warm touch and he softly thumbed her cheek. "If I haven't been perfectly clear in my intentions, I do not want a Block to dampen our Resonance, Phage. I do not want it severed either. We can make this work."

She lazily opened her optics. "You...want to keep it?"

"Of course I do."

"I had to ask. For clarity."

"Because we get some funny thoughts in our processors?"

"You do!" She objected. "I've lost count how many times Spike and I have had to set the record straight."

"You try onlining on an alien world and see if you have trouble."

"No doubt I will and already have. Assimilating into Cybertronian culture is not easy. I got unwittingly hitched after all." Phage-One became suddenly aware that they had drawn closer to one another. Their joined servos had become locked between their frames. "I married us?" She said abruptly as she stared intently at their joined servos. "I'm married?" She repeated quietly in utter disbelief.

"We technically became sparkmates, or conjunx endurae, the moment you took my spark into yours." He chuckled dryly. "Secondary emergency spark chambers exist for a reason."

"I'll keep that in mind." She murmured but said suddenly, "Doesn't it feel wrong? The way the resonance happened."

Optimus blinked. "I know our relationship has always been a bit... unorthodox."

"Like marriage before a first date?"

"We have had a first date. And seconds, and thirds. But, just because we have bonded does not mean we cannot have second first dates or second second dates or second thirds..." A large silly grin plastered across her face as she shyly ducked her cranium. Optimus gently cupped her chin and lifted her cranium back up. "Do not hide. I love your smile."

Her smile stretched a mile wide. Optimus matched hers as a small little game ensued, of her trying to duck her cranium again into his chassis but he bumped her cranium back up. He leaned in suddenly to steal a kiss and Phage turned aside, leaving his lips brushing air. He pressed his forehead against hers then and rubbed their foreheads together. "Your still upset."

"It's a lot to process. Everything was different a week ago. You were strictly formal with me only and now..."

She left it hanging. Optimus exhaled slowly. "We can take our pedes off the gas. I know some spots..."

"I bet you do." She smiled coyly. Optimus grinned and rubbed olfactories with her as he carded his digits through her omni-hair. Again she leaned into his servo, thoroughly enjoying the contact but when she cracked her optics open again he could tell she was still conflicted. "It doesn't bother you that we're bonded?"

"No. You are a wonderful femme, Phage-One."

"I feel as though it is as tarnished as a drunken Vegas wedding."

Optimus pulled back and, at first, she worried if she had said too much. Confusion marked Optimus Prime's fresh face as he tried to decipher the metaphor. "Tarnished? What is tarnished?" He cradled her face in both his servos. "How many can say their Conjunx Ritus occurred during an active battle? For lightning we had lasers. For music, gunfire and explosions. Friends and enemies alike were present to witness the event. During a Conjunx Ritus, there are four symbolic Acts that are performed during the ceremony: the Act of Devotion, the Act of Disclosure, the Act of Intimacy and the Act of Profference. You took each and turned them into herculean feats that I fear none can repeat."

"I did?" She exclaimed in surprise.

"Yes." Optimus laughed. "Primus, I wonder what you would have done had you known and been trying."

"Move the stars?" She quipped, and laughed and cracked a smile to ease the lid off the wild ride of emotions brewing within. "But for shame on you, Optimus Prime. Do not tell me that. You know us Witwicky's. Someone sets a bar high and we have to say 'hold my beer.' Even if it is our own record."

"Please don't. I do not think my spark could handle that. What higher Act of Devotion could be presented than what you have already performed? You were a civilian class and yet you flung yourself into combat to save my life. What greater understanding could we gain from each other in an Act of Disclosure than what I have learned of you and you of me from the psyche patch? What Act of Intimacy can compare than when you held my spark in your servos? And who can compare to all the Acts of Profference that you have given onto my cogsmechs and myself? For your first Act you fought for our rights on your world. Your second gift you battled for our lands and won us territory. And for your third Act of Profference, you gifted me my life. Tarnished? ...I would openly invite any mech to point to a Conjunx Ritus Ceremony anywhere in Cybertronian history that could compare to ours."

By the end of his speech, silent tears had cut paths down her cheeks. "You romantic fool. Did you forget the part where you nearly died?"

"Perception, Phage-One. Perception." Optimus chided gently. Lights swam in her optics before more tears spilled down her cheeks. It was then that Phage-One buried her face in his chassis. Prime's strong arms enwrapped her as he laid his cranium on top of hers.

"What are you doing to me?" She struggled to say pass the lump in her throat. "I never cry."

Optimus lightly chuckled and gently stroked his bulky digits along her exposed synthoplasmic skin of the small of her lower back. "I'm quite the lucky mech."

"Why is that?" She managed to rasp out through a constructed throat.

"I have the privilege of wooing you all over again." He felt her smile break across her face. "I have thought long and hard about how this would go over for days now, you know. I even had some music selected. Just in case."

"What music...?"

He shifted his weight, a little embarrassed. And then the gentle strains of Toto's 'Hold the Line,' spilled from the Prime's frame and drifted through her quarters. Phage gently laughed through the tears and buried herself deeper into his arms. Optimus held her fast and began softly stroking her omni-hair. After a bit, she said something but it came out muffled.

"What was that?" He asked softly.

She leaned back. She splayed her servos across his chassis as his servos dropped down to her lower back. "You don't mind the omni-hair?"

Optimus blinked. "Why would... Oh." He said flatly, his processes churning over events. "Earlier. Phage, you surprise me. Of course not. How could you think I would?"

"Just, everyone seems to be having a strong reaction too it. You explained a bit it has to do with a Quintesson."

"Thee Quintessons enslaved all of Cybertron long before the Golden Age. Our people never forgot and, I believe, hold some deeply coded repulsion for anything Quintesson by function."

"The omni-hair."

"It's part of you and I love you." He carded his digits through her omni-hair, trailed his servo down and around and cupped her face. Her omni-hair clung to his servo and wrapped slowly around his arm. At his warm touch her optics drifted shut as she leaned into contact. "What more need I say?"

Quiet tears cut down her face. Her white denta flashed as she bit her red lips. "Well, I-" she struggled to ask through a tight throat, "You love me." She stopped abruptly to maintain a sliver of her composure and covered his servo with her own. "Even knowing my recent romantic entanglements?"

"Phage-One." Optimus said patiently. "We Cybertronians live for millions of years. Forever if we maintain ourselves and Primus forbid there is war or accident. And in all that time we do become bored and seek new experiences." His voice dropped to conspiratorial notes just then that left her chuckling at his try at humor. "And I know you are aware of Jazz's dealings with the locale women. -That said, if there were other femmes out there somewhere in the universe, I can safely say that it is highly improbable that they are not experienced. So to answer your question, yes I love you, even knowing of your 'romantic entanglements.' It does not phase me-no pun intended. ..Was there anything else bothering you?"

"Yes." She admitted with some trouble. She closed her optics to try and find her center in the storm and after a moment to collect herself and her thoughts she said slowly and with extreme difficulty, "What happens when you find Cybertron and there are rebuilding efforts and Alita-1's body is discovered? What happens to us when you revive her?" His expression dropped. "I could never compete with her, Optimus."

The music cut. Sudden silence enveloped them. Gradually, Optimus brought his second servo up and framed her face between them. "I need you to listen to me."

"Yes."

"Alita-1 is never coming back."

"Why? When you find Cybertron-"

Shockingly, Optimus Prime cut her off. "Phage. I can't."

In response to the heartbreaking question, Phage-One just nodded acceptance. Knowing what she had learned of Solhura Storm, Phage did not press the issue further, presuming that, when the Ark platform had been bombarded, there was no body left to recover. And so, Phage lowered her optics and whispered; "Optimus, I'm sorry for bringing it up. The thought came to me and I needed to ask. I don't think I could handle you promising me forever only for you to turn around one day and-" She couldn't finish. Her voice betrayed her and cracked on a wretched sob. Hot tears slipped unbidden down her cheeks. Optimus folded her into his comforting embrace and hugged her fiercely to his frame. As Phage spent the next few minutes struggling to shore up the break in her resolve, Optimus softly peppered intermittent kisses on the top of her omni-hair.

"I would never do that to you." He murmured between the featherlight kisses. "I would never create a resonance just to break it on a whim. Any mech who could do that would be cruel beyond measure." Optimus paused briefly, considering, before adding, "Alita and I had a pact. If one of us fell we would find someone else to love and who made us happy. I never intended to hold up my side of that deal. I just wanted her to be guilt free if anything were too happen. But then you came along and threw a wrench into everything." A tight laugh bubbled through her tears and constricted throat. "So, when I tell you I endure for you, I mean that and intend to hold myself up to the highest ideals a sparkmate can." He kissed her omni-hair one last time before laying his cranium atop of hers. "I want this to work between us. We have such promising chemistry."

She nodded agreement, not yet daring to trust her voice just then. They were quiet a span of time, just soaking in each other's presence through touch and sense. Sometime after Phage-One had quieted after the puncture to her emotional high walls, Optimus broke the moment by adjusting his stance and said softly, "I know you do not remember what we had before. I could share the memories with you as either my Act of Disclosure or Act of Profference if it would help ease your insecurities?"

"How would we do that? We're not timesharing headspace anymore."

"There are ways." He replied cryptically as he pressed his forehead to hers and rubbed them gently together. Phage smiled and hmmed at the sweet contact.

"Oh? And what ways are those? Using another psychic patch to link us again?"

"That would be unnecessary."

:I've missed your cool undersea.:

His deep resonant voice echoed in her head. His words cleaved her very spark. Phage gasped sharply and would have jumped a mile high if Optimus did not hold her firm against him. The Prime laughed quietly, deep baritone chuckles that shook his chassis even as she swatted his arm. "How!?" Was all she managed to squeak out.

:The resonance. We are one.:

His arms encircled her tightly. Her slim servos framed his face. They held each other steady. "But the Disentanglement!"

"Was for the psychic patch. To extract me. I think I need to inform Ratchet you need a refresher course."

"Oh no!" She quipped once again but with mock horror.

"How did you think I was going to help train you? Through empathic suggestion alone or by being a presence that could bolster your willpower?"

"You!" She laughed, head spinning. "You sneaky bastard!"

"Whose being sneaky?" His smug smile was blinding. :Would you like the memories back? They are, unfortunately, only from my perception of events. Which is still very informative given we Cybertronians have perfect recall...:

"It would level the playing field, wouldn't it?"

"Is that a yes?" He asked eagerly.

"Well," she said slowly as they rubbed olfactories together in a teasing dance that ghosted kissing. "I think if we're going to start over fresh I should be privy to all information to make an informed decision, wouldn't you think?"

"Given I have a conflict of interest in this decision, you should not be asking me."

"Optimus!" The short burst of a laugh was as much needed as the playful tap she gave his arm. "Couples make important decisions together."

A low dark rumble emanated from the back of Optimus Prime's throat. The rich sound was joined by a low frequency rumble from his engine that she felt in her chassis. "Then my answer is yes. You should be privy to all information to make an informed decision. But I should warn you, again, the memories are explicit."

"Mm. And? They're my memories too."

"Final warning."

"Optimus!" She chided gently, smiling, her laughter light. "What are you, a firewall?"

"If you insist." He murmured huskily.

Unlike when Optimus Prime's psyche had been trapped in her cranium and she received unsolicited memories that bounded to the forefront of thought, this time when she received a memory it was neatly contained, as though in a letter, beautifully sealed and dated. One after another after another, until she had received a tidy little bundle. The first she opened in the chronological order provided was the day she had approached him about starting a romantic relationship. She rediscovered that day, when Optimus Prime and a number of the Autobot's had been trapped in their holoforms due to a bad patch to the holomatter software that Ratchet had promise would 'increase immersion'. While so imprisoned in the form, Alicean Witwicky had come to him in the early morning and while they discussed mundane topics as she indulged in her morning coffee the conversation inevitably drifted to current events, which led to their conversation on heartache, and loss, and Alita-1's termination and Blackrock's betrayal. And then Alicean, having worked up the nerve over the course of the emotional conversation, asked him if he would be open to a purely carnal, no-strings-attached arrangement since neither had any plans on finding another significant other. Reliving the conversation jarred Phage now as much as it had shocked Optimus Prime then.

Phage-One's optics fluttered open. She became distinctly aware of their entangled frames, the danger of their closeness. Half in a fog and half jarred out of it from the memory, she asked of no one, "What kind of headspace was I in to ask you that?"

Optimus drew his olfactory across hers in a long eskimo kiss. His servos trailed along her waist and left tantalizing trails of fire in their wake. Optics half shuttered, he replied in the same intoxicating rumble, "I am glad you had the nerve."

"I'm not...denying...the...Mmm." She sighed pleasantly as Optimus's digits worked wonders on muscle cables she had no idea were even sore. "Go back. Squeeze that...Yes."

She melted at his touch. Optimus's chuckle was deep and rich, and through their shared resonated bond, Phage-One Sensed that he was deeply enjoying the reactions and sounds he was already drawing from her. Realizing the sway she held over him only aroused her.

"Have you reviewed the other memories yet?"

"No."

"Go on, if you'd like." His open invitation was like thick honey that she couldn't resist.

So, she did.

Opening the next memory in the stack was their first awkward but sweetly intimate moment together. There was no exaggeration when Optimus mentioned total memory recall. The memories were as pristine as captured video with emotion and sensation. And seeing herself in compromising positions from Optimus's perspective was an interesting experience. One that she immediately associated as watching an adult film, a strange coping mechanism she had adopted to deal with her Matrix imprints to disassociate herself from the experiences for sanity's sake. This experience was, however, quite different and one she was willing to immerse herself in.

Cheeks already burning a vibrant hue, Phage quickly abandoned the memory and opened the next, and another and another, only to discover that the moment they committed themselves to their arrangement cemented their wild abandoned affair. As long as he was trapped in the holomatter form, there wasn't a moment of wasted time that he wasn't spending it railing her. And when Ratchet had finally fixed the bug in the holomatter software and Optimus could finally return his holomatter projection back to his frame, he had taken her out on proper dates, which, more often than not, ended with them intimately entangled. Phage-One could only blush even harder at the wild hedonistic shenanigans they got up too, whether it was at the Ark or at a secluded location after a long scenic drive, or at the local drive-in theater...

"How did you manage godly-level restraint when Command said to distance yourself..."

"It is not my first time away from a beloved, Phage. But, it was the first time they've been so near and yet so far. I have been in a private pitt all of my own for two Earth years. I hope you can forgive me that I had to put up such a hard distance."

Perhaps it was that she dragged him down, or he pulled her close, but the inevitably was that his lips locked with hers and all mental process flatlined for Phage-One. Kissing the Prime was a fast acting fatal addiction. Sensory fire exploded across her lips and ignited a chemical fire straight down in her belly. Most strangest and exciting of all was Sensing Optimus through the resonance bond. She was peripherally aware of his emotions and sensory input from the feel of her own lips on his to his deep love and restrained arousal. She immediately relished the new experience to an old game and quickly drowned in all the new sensory input.

When Optimus pulled away from Phage-One's intoxicating kiss, green electrical energy briefly trailed between their lips and fizzled out when the distance grew to great. He felt he needed that energy. Craved the familiar yet wild matrix energies that fueled her frame and raced through her circuits. He almost crashed his lips on hers again he felt himself a mech so starved for intimate contact and her addicting energy, yet managed that level of iron will he was so renowned for. Just as Phage began to moan in complaint at his missing lips, Optimus's servos shifted placement. One slipped under her aft and another hooked the back of her right leg. Before she knew what was what, her pedes were off the floor. Phage squealed in delight at the easy flaunt of strength, and then her legs were wrapped around his slim waist and her arms locked around his strong neck. His capable servos supported her aft and squeezed her right thigh. Their lips crashed a second time as heated and as passionate as the first. Time and place quickly became an abstract construct.

A moment's sense of self awareness flickered across Phage's processor when Optimus Prime pulled back a second time. Again, green electrical surges trailed after his lips and promptly dissipated. "I need to hear it, my Alo Ata." Optimus Prime demanded in a husky groan.

Her optics fluttered open and quickly gasped, "Oh!" When she found the hue of his optics had shifted to a deep, lustful, purple hue. She could have lost herself in the tantalizing color, and began to, despite Optimus's demand. She snaked one arm out and around and softly trailed her digit tips along his jawline.

Optimus nipped at her digits when they drew too close to his mouth. She gasped again, then laughed and promptly yipped when he jostled her and slapped her right thigh. "My spark," he rumbled thickly sweet, "I need to hear you say the words."

She was lost deep in her own heady fog and floundered to grasp coherent thought. "What words?" She gasped as Optimus dodged her questing lips and instead kissed a trail down her neck. She moaned and squeezed her legs around his waist at the tender ghost sensations left behind, and sighed and giggled as he kissed and suckled the nap of her neck.

"That your mine." Optimus growled between kisses, his voice a deep and intoxicating noise that vibrated against her primary fuel line in her neck and stroked the flames in her core. "And only mine. I pledged myself to you eternally. I need to hear you say it." And his servos slipped down her thighs, trailed along her legs and hooked at the back of both her knees.

"You need..." She found it a struggle to think, to string words together, when his every touch was a delicious fire. "I love you."

He jostled her again. Phage-One moaned when her intimate core bounced against his codpiece.

"In Cybertronian, Phage-One." He whispered thickly against her audio.

"Demanding." She teased.

Suddenly, Optimus tore his lips away from her neckline and pressed his forehead against hers. Their optics locked, his expression tense as their breathing came in slow and heavy. "You haven't seen me demanding yet, Alo Ata. If you had reviewed the memories properly, you may have better prepared yourself." Her breathing hitched. "Say you endure for me eternally too, my love. I need to hear it."

Her glossa was thick in her mouth. Thinking was bogged down. Still, she tried to string syllables together into coherency. "Et endu-ra...eyoto..." Optimus's smile was brilliant. He ducked his cranium back to her neckline to resume kissing. Phage squealed in pleasure as he gently grazed his denta against the sensitive spot on her neck and suckled it immediately after. "Etu cyturn! Ah! Etu cyturn! -Ouf!" Through the bond, Phage-One was flooded by a sensory tide of the Prime's love and arousal, and then, still wrapped around his waist, he pushed her hard against the nearest wall.

The moment her back hit the wall his right servo snapped against the area beside her cranium. Immediately her optics flew open and locked with Optimus Prime's intense, smoldering gaze. Her breath stalled in her throat.

"You endure for me eternally."

"Yes." She breathed and then promptly tried to steal a kiss.

The Prime captured her lips in a hungry, desperate kiss, then quickly tore away, leaving her moaning at the loss. Chaotic Creation Matrix energy popped between their lips again at his abrupt retreat. He leaned forward again, but instead of kissing her, he laid his forehead against hers and rubbed them together. The Prime's auxiliary vents whirled and his chassis heaved as he drew in air to keep himself steady. "I am never letting you go again, Alo Ata. Do you compute? You are mine. I swear by Primus, if Megatron ever touches you again, or any Decepticon, they will rue the day."

"Optimus Prime." Her servos came off the back of his neck and wrapped tightly around both his helm's antenna. She yanked him forward as she leaned in, desperate for his kiss but denying them both. This time, Optimus Prime's optics went wide as he stared into hers, noting as the inner green light expanded and swiftly burned away the blue until only the chemical green fire remained. She opened her mouth and her voice dipped into the rich velvetine vocals he was learning to associate with the Endurus. "Shut up and fuck me or so help me you will rue this night."

Optimus Prime's optics flared and a wide roguish grin split his lips. "Ma'am, yes, ma'am."

A lopsided grin tugged at her lips, and then she pulled him forward and began kissing him again.

Thwang!

"Oh!" Phage-One yipped as Optimus promptly slapped her aft. Her face was the picture of surprise as Optimus's intense smoldering stare seared into her.

"Language, Endurus."

"Oh, is that how this is going to be?"

"Hmhmm."

She bit her bottom lip as a naughty glint settled in her optics. "Well fuck me."

Thwack!

"Ah!'

"Stubborn as always." Teased Prime.

Clang!

"Ow! Why?" She demanded. "I didn't say anything that time!"

"Never shush me." Her optics grew wide. Her breath shallow. And then another smart slap to her aft. Another sharp gasp slipped her bright red lips. She stared into the Prime's dark optics with her wide ones and slack jaw. "How many times do you suppose you swore at the Decepticon base?"

She bit her bottom lip. He slapped her aft again, harder. A little moan escaped her. "I asked a question, Endurus."

"Too much."

"Hm." Another slap and another moan, louder than the last, spilled from her lips. "And twice since during this discussion."

"You weren't like this before."

"You were straight laced Alicean then, remember. I didn't need to discipline you did I?"

"No." She whispered breathlessly.

"Exactly, love." He peppered her with kisses, between every so few he said huskily, "You were playing a dangerous game back there, taunting and teasing me the way you did. Did you really think it wasn't going to come back around?"

"No."

Optimus chuckled darkly. "Well, that was your second mistake."

"Second?" She gasped as Optimus began slowly gyrating against her. She immediately shifted her legs to get the best friction. "What was my first?"

"Your first was falling in the berth with Sideswipe and Sunstreaker. That you even needed two mechs to please you and you still weren't satisfied tells me everything I need to know."

She threw her head back against the wall and let out a long deep laugh. Optimus's attention fell back to her exposed neckline and his pace quickened until he was grinding her into the wall and her laughter became pleasurable gasps and longing moans.

"Yes, it tells you I'm insatiable."

"Oh," rumbled Optimus Prime, "I remember. I also remember you were quite satisfied."

"Those were your memories." She replied teasingly. "Not mine. How do you know I wasn't faking satisfaction?"

Everything stalled. Movement. The kissing. Optimus reared back and gave her one of his intense, smoldering stares. "Faking." He finally said gravelly. She could feel her spark pulsing in her chassis. "Did you have to fake it for the Twins?"

Her mouth dropped open. Embarrassed at herself for walking right into that trap, she could only laugh it off. And then Optimus sprung a surprise attack and captured her open mouth. His glossa met hers and intense chemical fire raced through her systems. And then again his servos slid down her legs and fixed them to his hips before he pinned her hard against the wall. Optimus's chuckle was thick and dark. "You really think I couldn't handle you, did you? You are in for a wild ride."

"We'll see won't we?"

"You enjoy digging yourself in deeper, don't you?"

"I enjoy the thrill when I can still come out on top. Anything less is just unsatisfactory."

"We'll see about that."

"Will we now?"

He just smiled, a stunning mischievous grin that few ever got to see. Her fuel pump lodged itself at the back of her throat witnessing it. "I know I was more than capable of handling you before, Alo Ata. Now that we are resonated, you are going to find that you have never experienced interfacing before until now."

"Oh really." She breathed featherlight, trying to maintain her sensual tone and finally faltered.

Optimus Prime did not respond. Instead, the distance disappeared between them and they were fiercely kissing once again, desperate to placate their carnal hunger and close the gap in time and space spent unwillingly apart. Armor disappeared, when and where was blur. And then a whirlwind of intense sensation followed. Phage-One found, to her utter delight, that Optimus Prime had been right. Lovemaking became an entirely new experience while resonated. Discerning her own emotions, her own sensations from Optimus Prime's that spilled through the bond blurred the lines between where she began and he ended. She drowned in the experience, swiftly loosing her sense of self. With it went her extensive vocabulary that collapsed to a scattered handful of words and pleasurable gasps and moans and long sighs. Intermingled with that was the Prime and the Endurus's passionate klanking. For the remainder of the solar cycle and well into the night, Phage-One's quarters resounded with thee primal Cybertronian song and dance of life.