Struggle, But not Alone

Ch.4

Not Unpunished

Pov: Dutch

The world around me was garbled. Blinded by the darkness encapsulating my head. Wondering how I got into this situation.

Deep down, I knew it was less than deserved. The air seemed to be strangled out more with each re-entry in the Deep. Water filling my lungs, time slowing down.

Again, I feel the pull of the hand of one whom I had betrayed.

Air surrounded my face as I gasped for it while coughing the drink out of me.

Sadly a two edged sword. Though I could breath, a voice in the air entered my ears.

"What do ya say boys? Did I get enough behind his ears?"

Arthur Morgan, always quick to action. It's why I had made him my right hand man.

"Hmm he's got a little spot on his lips."

John Marston, always the arrogant runt of us. Yet he gave just as much effort as Arthur.

I was struggling to find enough air to talk, "P-please, let me-!"

The plea was quickly met with more water. Not nearly as long as the previous dunks.

"Nevermind, that was his mustache."

"Let me have a crack at him!"

I felt myself get tossed away on my feet by Arthur before I could say or do anything.

"Go for it, Bill."

Bill, he was the quiet type that ran his mouth while drunk. Yet he had skill in combat from his time in the military, and wasn't afraid to get dirty.

I was about to be submerged again, until a timid voice came to my defense.

"I-I think he's had enough."

Uncle, Lazy, cowardly. That's how he comes off at times. In truth, he's trying to run from his past. He was dependable when it counted.

It didn't mean that everyone felt that way, Bill being one.

"Oh I'm so sorry 'Red Harlow'. Maybe you would like a dip!"

Marston intervened, "Hey, leave the old man out of this!"

He didn't care, "Didn't you listen to what I've been sayin?! I ain't listening to you, or anyone else!"

In his rant, hand came upon his shoulder

"Bill, calm down and think for a moment."

Javier Escuella, he wasn't one who normally started fights, but he was one who finished them. Patience was his strength.

And Bill proved himself that he had none and dunked me in again.

I wanted a real reason to resist this torment, to say they were wrong for doing this. If I told them, "After all I've done for you?!", I would be wrong in that assumption. All choices led to the grave, and this one might. I just needed a chance to make it clear. I can't be forgiven, but I can put things in the right direction. For them.

I waited what felt more than a minute before I was brought back up, not by Bill. Again, it was Arthur who pulled me up.

"Bill! We're not trying to kill him!"

"Aren't we?! Don't pretend you still care for him?!"

"I could say I would care less for any of you besides Marston! You are just as much as up there on my list as he is!"

I was let go, giving me time to stand on my own.

Bill yelled at Arthur,

"Then why don't you kill me! Let's get it over with!"

"Because I 'Do' care about all of you!"

That made my ears twitch. Arthur paused and continued after the silence, "Shaun, Hosea, Lenny, all of them, died weeks ago! … Mrs Grimshaw was two nights before when Micah shot her!… I know it sounds stupid, but It was yesterday for me! And I know it was Micah that drove us apart! I lived in the gang almost my whole life, and to see it go up in smoke like that…"

Bill lowered his hands from his sides, as did everyone. And Javier broke the silence, "I thought Dutch shot her?"

John answered, "No, Micah was the first to shoot."

Bill answered yet shaking his head, "Did he?"

"You were next to him. Remember?"

"Ah… No!… Was I?"

His head looked down trying to remember. Sadly, it seemed his fears of his father's condition in him were true. Lapses of memory, bursts of anger. I saw glimpses of this back then, it must have grown.

I took advantage of this pause to speak, "When Micah shot her… I messed up. I traded one dream for another… I only learned what I really wanted at my death… And I can't have that any more. My greed blinded me. I told you, John, we can't fight nature… Maybe there was more than one that died that day."

I paused before continuing, "So my plan… Is that I have no plan. Sure I set it up, got us in deeper than intended. But, I can't do anymore. Haven't you all noticed something about everyone here?"

My old family looked at each other, not seeing what I was getting at.

"All of us died because of ME. My plans, my actions got us here. Every one of us here was a Van Der Linde."

Javier shook his head, "Come on, there has to be another reason. Bill and I woke up in a field near here, some little girl came running up to us smiling, saying all kinds of weird things and told us about this village. Know anyone crazy like that?"

…

Arthur coughed, "A girl told you to come here, and you just did?"

"Both of us were dead, remember. We didn't have many options."

Bill confirmed while clearly agitated, "Hm, she kept calling me ShoeBill."

Javier nodded,

"Coincidence? Something else might be at work. Pulling the strings for another reason."

I shook my head at that, "That doesn't change the formula, all of us worked together for years. I'm the missing link. All my plans lead to our deaths… So I can't make the specifics of the plan, I leave how we do this to you. I only have one more thing to add to it, which is the final decision afterwards."

All of them looked at me confused, yet I held back emotions as I said, "We go our separate ways."

I didn't dare look at their faces and continued, "This time, we take the money and run. We go our separate ways, a-and we never see each other again. All of us have been given a second chance. This Plan may be dangerous, but it's for once honest work! No law is after us here, and it would be wasted with us together."

I waited to hear the answer, expecting the worst.

"Ok."

I looked up to see Arthur looking disappointed, yet understanding.

"I can accept that deal. That's about as much as any of us can stand each other I suppose. In the meantime, let's put aside our differences and figure this out."

After some time, everyone agreed. For some it was begrudgingly. For me, I smiled at the thought of us together. If only for one last time.

"Are you old-timers done?"

Guts, the one I didn't know too much about. My mind was too preoccupied to bother sizing the boy up. His attitude comes off as uncaring. Yet he only chose now to speak up, following us to glean some information.

With the right amount of time, he would have made a great Van Der Linde…

"That time will never come back."

It wasn't my voice that said that, didn't make it any less true.

Finishing up my impression on the kid, one thing that still stood out to me was that sword. Arthur asked about it, and I didn't listen as much as I should have. The way he cradled upon it at the camp, he knew how to use it.

Bill answered the kid with distaste, "Is that how you speak to nobles, boy?"

Arthur laughed, "He already knows we're not."

The bearded man looked like he was just robbed,

"Wha- How?!"

"We met him before coming here, he guided us to the job. Much like your crazy girl."

Bill rolled his eyes and walked up to Guts with a pointed finger,

"Well don't think you're hot stuff because you're in on it."

He must have moved in too close, because the dark haired boy just swatted off the hand close to him while reaching for his sword.

"Don't touch me!"

That sudden reaction shocked us, even Bill. The veteran looked like he saw something at that moment. Any and all aggression washed away, and not from the threat of a sword.

"I-."

He said nothing more to Guts, and walked away. Clearly upset, not angered by the boy's emotional outburst. At the same time, confusing the lad who was expecting a different reaction.

I glanced at the rest of us to see the only one, besides Bill, not confused was Uncle. He looked sorrowful at the boy, which is saying a lot from the washed up outlaw.

While trying to see it again in my head, I supposed the boy's face held pain. A pain they must have related to-…

Oh… Kid.

It finally clicked as to what that was about and I put it to rest for now. This was something we might talk about after this coming fight.

Best change the direction,

"Well, I want to thank you, Guts. I know we didn't really talk to each other yet, but my name is Dutch Van Der Linde."

He eased up a bit and sighed, "Yeah, that's all I've been hearing from your friends last night, and your little speech."

"Well, either way, you helped make this possible."

Guts brushed it off, "Don't take it the wrong way. Your weapons, I wanted to see them in action. Being on the battlefield my entire life, I've learned any changes to it needs to be watched. We may be allies for now, tomorrow we could be at each other's throats."

Arthur spoke up, "Be that as it may, we aren't planning on giving these weapons to anyone."

"Doesn't matter, people will see it, want it. With or without your weapons for reference."

"Then we'll make sure nobody does."

The boy wasn't satisfied, but held off when he noticed something, "Looks like 'your' soldiers have arrived."

We all turned to see a group of lightly armored men with pikes, swords, and daggers. None of the helmets had covered their faces entirely, and at the most they had metal chest plates with metal shin and arm guards for real protection. Everything else was fabric or leather.

As they came near, a pit fell in my stomach at the sight of them… They were children! The oldest of them looked about sixteen and the youngest fourteen! Clearly they had been lied to!… No, the Noble saw it as he saw it. They would have been men in this society.

It seems even the set up of my plan seemed to implement more suffering for others, then again maybe not.

It might be safer for them with us. Just maybe…

The eldest of the kids came forward, "Excuse me sirs', do you happen to know where we could find a group called 'The Band of Nobles?' We were sent to assist them."

I walked up to their leader, "That would be us, son."

Panic came across his face as he slightly bowed, "Forgive me, Sir. I was told not to underestimate you when I met you, I'm the sergeant in charge of these men."

I flinched at the title he gave themselves,

"I see. Well then, my name is Dutch Van Der Linde. What's your name, Sergeant?"

He looked down more, "It's best not to know, Sir. I'm no one important."

I smiled at his brashness, similar to when I met Arthur.

We'll see about that.

"Just humor us then and tell us your name, and what you did before this."

"... My name is Rod, I was a pig farmer."

There was a snicker or two from the back of his troop, and Rod looked down in shame.

I chuckled a bit which added to his embarrassment more before I told him, "Rod, where we're from, nobody was any less valuable from a 'nobleman' to a stable boy."

Any laughter was stopped as I continued, "It's an honest profession to have and that's more than some can say for themselves. Greater people came from less. Even no good bastards can lay a claim."

I walked over to Bill, not laying a hand on him in case I set him off. Only gesturing to him,

"Williamson here was a disgraced soldier, and I made him a General."

Now it was my old gang that looked at me like I had grown another head. Bill looked like he was about to protest when I whispered to him so none of the rookies could hear, "You're in charge."

In an instant, the biggest grin I had ever seen came across that wrinkled face. It quickly went away, but he did a terrible job of hiding any excitement while quickly walking forward,

"That's right, men! I have seen more than and done more before any of yous have been born. The way I see it, you all are sheep!"

The kids looked at each other before Bill explained, "I mean you all are too ignorant of what your leaders will do to you! A gullible lot!

"They would send you out to die for a rock that has no value, and all you get is a pat on the back! And if you're really good, they give you a medal for all that trouble while standing over a pile of your friends!"

Fear started coming across the children's faces, all of this was beyond their understanding. Yet this was what they now had to accept.

"But General, sir! We have no choice, all of our homes were destroyed by the other side!"

Bill smirked,

"So you want revenge? Bah! They have you down to peg! They let the other side get recruitment for them, then they attack back! Now you're stuck in an endless cycle! You try to leave, you'll be left with no job! You'll be seen as drifters, bandits."

A young one had the balls to argue, "You're wrong! The nobles have been fighting to protect us for the last hundred years!"

Bill is right, but a hundred years? Didn't a European country have that long of a war?

"Then they have been playing this game for a hundred years! Why after all, your 'Noble' sold you to us! Complete strangers!"

Easy, Bill…

"So, enough of that. Since I'm in charge now,"

He took a small glance at John with a wicked smile before continuing,

"I'm going to need to see your formations! Line up!"

Each teen rushed to their positions as Williamson walked the line. He looked at their weapons and nodded his head,

"Who here has used a bow and arrow? Raise your hand?"

Nearly all of them raised their hands meekly.

"How comfortable are you in using it for combat?"

A few lowered their hands, leaving an almost even half across the line.

"Now, can you arm yourselves with them? Before the fight I mean."

Rod spoke up, "Y-yes sir! We would have to switch out our equipment with the range master. "

"Then I want everyone who can shoot with them to switch out! Everyone else can use a spear."

Another kid spoke out of turn.

"But some of us have never used one!"

Bill yelled, "Do you always yell at your superiors?! If you still want to fight, then do as I say! Otherwise, you can see how your noble treats insubordination!"

They all appeared to have got the message.

"Now, before any change in gear, I want you to line up where I say! Spear men, step forward and line up here. Then kneel with your spears pointed out!"

Bill took a spear from one of the children and started drawing a line on the sand. Quickly the kids did as they were told. He even knelt so that his spear was at an angle

"This is the 'Barricade' Line! You are to stand your ground so the man behind you can keep shooting! If calvary comes near, you can take defensive positions like this. Archers! Line up behind them on their sides!"

My elected "General" sat up looking at the boys rushing to their placements.

"Now, get a feel for this! We are going to be on the front lines with the other infantry, and this is how we move forward…"

He then proceeded to spend the next twenty minutes going over other positions on the field and what each of them were expected to do. It seemed his time in the military was never forgotten, yet he I could he wasn't satisfied with the performance of them,

"Alright, Now I want each of you to go to the range master! The bowmen, like I said, I want you to switch out your spears for bows and quivers. And spear men, I want you to convince him to give you quivers and arrows as well! Spit in his eyes if you must! We'll double up the ammo we got!"

"Yes, Sir!"

"Can I get a Hooah!"

I held back a snort as the kids were baffled, Williamson asked again, "Say it! HOOAH!"

"..Hooah?"

"No, HOOAH!"

"H-hoowh!"

"Louder!"

"HOOAH!"

"We'll work on that! Report back here when you're done, dismissed!"

The kids hurried off and left the seven of us alone, John spoke up, "Well Bill, you're a professional. I don't know what exactly, but a professional."

"Hm, and I'd suppose you could do better?"

"Yeah, send them away! We don't need to send a bunch of children to die for silver!"

John turned to me with a contemptuous look that said it all, and I agreed with him. But still,

"We can't send them back, John. As much as we want to, we are already on thin ice with that Noble. All we can do now is protect them the best we can."

Guts chuckled unimpressed, "Sentimental fools, all of you. What do you think that's worth in the end? They'll die sooner or later in battle."

I couldn't disagree with him, and before I could come up with a response, Arthur surprised me,

"Then we'll help them, Live or Die. If we can, No man left behind."

Guts shook his head in unbelief,

"We'll see, Old timers."

Williamson took charge of the situation again, "Sounds like we have a volunteer for those kids' second Sergeant. Congratulations, you just got a field promotion."

Anger came across the teen's face, "I didn't volunteer for anything!"

"Didn't you?! Then what are you doing here?"

He was about to yell before he stopped himself at the realization that he did in fact volunteer to watch us, and that would mean working with us.

"Fine, but they better not get in my way."

"Eh. Talk to them when they get back. It's necessary that we can split up our force on a moment's notice. So if we can, we need to know who we are going with. I will be in charge of one with Dutch, Javier, and Rod. Arthur will be in the other with Guts, John, and Uncle. Any complaints?"

I was a little concerned about working with one so close to drowning me, but I did put him in charge. Keeping it to myself, nobody said a word.

"Good, then we should discuss our ammo situation."

… I hadn't thought of that.

Williamson held his revolver, "I got about seventy five rounds. I didn't have my rifle with me, but I have fifty shots for one."

Javier motioned to his pistol, "I have about 60 bullets. And I have a Carcano rifle, 20 shots. Notice anything, John?"

He sighed, "Yeah, we all came back with what we had on us. When some of your friends tried to break you out that night I brought you in… I heard that you almost escaped till a guard shot you in the back. They said they considered you a threat."

"Well, that's partly true. I was armed, only it was for defense in the escape route my rescuers made. Seems it was my undoing. I was so close to leaving it all behind… Either way, I have what I had on me."

John laughed, "Well, lucky me. I had a full arsenal."

He pulled out a few handguns, one I was most familiar with. A semi automatic pistol, much like the one I regrettably tossed days before. The revolver I had now was John's, pulling it out of his holster in my fear as he came near to me in those woods.

He had behind him a couple of shoulder strapped guns. A Henry Repeater, and a pump shotgun. In his satchel, he even showed an assortment of destruction. Fire bottles, a few tomahawks, and something really special, dynamite.

No wonder he tore through my forces…

"I have about 200 rounds for almost each of them, even for ones not on me. Though I am a little limited on my throwing ones."

Uncle went next,

"And all I got is my rifle, I left my pistol in the house before 'you know what' happened. Still have ammo for both. Hundred each."

Arthur went next, his was about as good as John's weapon list, only with two fewer pistols.

He had the old Lancaster Repeater, a double barrel, and a couple of cattleman revolvers.

"I have plenty of ammo, like John, about 200. Plenty of throwing weapons."

He showed the contents of his satchel as well. It was full to the brim with the same amount John had.

Finally, there was me, which wasn't all that impressive.

"All I had was my semi auto pistol bullets… I still have this from you, John. Used the six shots."

"Yeah, I'd like to have it back. Give you my semi for it."

I smiled at his small kindness as we made the exchange.

Bill walked up to John, "I need another weapon."

I didn't like where this was going. John answered hesitantly,

"Ok?"

"Give me your rifle, I'm a better shot with one anyway."

John smirked at him,

"Sorry, Bill. I'm keeping this one."

"John! You-!"

Arthur rushed to stop them, "Easy now, you can take mine and the ammo for it, Bill. I expect to get it back."

Williamson smiled,

"Of course, Arthur. At least someone has common sense."

Bill walked off with the Lancaster rifle, meticulously looking over the gun for wear and tear. John spoke to Arthur in a fallen tone, "You didn't need to."

"Well he's right, we need to balance our supplies. Right, Dutch?

I smiled a little, even when my betrayal was just days ago for him, he's still…

Hopeful about me…

Hope was something I had lost long ago, and probably won't find as long as I live.

I kept my mind on the present, "We have a big fight ahead of us, Guts said this is the last day of their siege if memory serves. We need to hit them hard to prove our worth. Bill is thinking along that line, and we'll do just that."

Morgan nodded,

"All right, then we should-… What is that?!"

John was looking over his Colt, "This? It's the '1911', it just came out… Oh! That's right. You've been gone for a while."

"Well, can't say I'm not familiar with it. It's a little like that '1899'."

"Yeah, about a twelve year difference."

A familiar sight caught my attention, "We can chat about this later, gentleman. Here they come."

Once more, the company returned with bows and arrows. Rod quickly ran up to us, "We got everything you requested, except we have an extra bow and quiver. Do either of you require one?"

Arthur raised his hand, "I'll take it."

Rod handed it to him as Arthur inspected the bow, it was a step up from the one he had before. At least I hoped it was.

"I'll need some practice, excuse me a moment."

Arthur walked off around a corner, Williamson came back while getting ready for another winded spiel. Javier went with John hoping to get some more ammo along with Uncle. Guts leaned on a nearby wall with his eyes closed.

Leaving me alone with my "General,"

"Take positions again!"

XXXXXX

Finally, the soldiers seemed to be shaping up better for the fight ahead of us. They were still a scared bunch, but they were keen on listening to orders.

"Alright! Now let's see some demonstration of your archery!"

It was then that Arthur returned in an unusual sight. He had shaved himself and looked ten years younger. Morgan also held his bow in hand with his quiver on his back, filled to the brim with arrows.

"Arthur, care to lend a hand?"

"Sure can."

He set himself beside the troops, keeping his bow by his side. Many of the boys whispered something that was not discernible, keeping their eyes on the man.

"Now, let's see that draw."

All of the archers drew an arrow from the quiver of the spearmen in front of them. Some of them still looked poor in their form, but I wasn't an expert on it. That would have been Charle's forte, Arthur was the next best thing.

"What do you think, Arthur?"

He walked behind the line, analyzing their form. Eventually he looked at Bill, "I'd say they need to ease up. Especially the younger ones. Let's give them some practice for themselves to calm their nerves."

"Alright, then let's find some targets! We got a little less than twenty minutes before the briefing! Let's move!"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I went with them as an observer, they were decent as I had seen some with a Bow. But I would say Arthur was a class above the rest of them. To believe he had only picked up learning the bow after Charles got hurt that one time and learned to be skilled with it within less than a month, it was unreal.

He gave as many tips as he could to the boys, but even he knew they needed more than the time given. They had also practiced controlled fire with Bill giving the commands.

After wrapping things up, we met up with the others and made our way to the sign up desk not a moment too soon. Only the attendant was present,

"If that's everyone, we can begin. Make your way to the grass lands east of here. It's a little walk from there."

We walked with the masses through the fields, eventually coming to a stop over a hill. Along the said hill were primitive looking cannons arrayed pointing over it. Behind them were artillery teams, and the Noble from before mounted up on a white horse. Only now he was fully suited up with finer armor than anyone there. He strode down the hill,

"I would personally like to thank you all for assisting in this attack. For the last three months, we have been laying siege to this enemy stronghold. In that time, a few scouting parties have been eliminated, except for one two days ago. That group had done a thorough investigation on the defenders strength and found them restless, and now short on hand. The constant bombardment has weakened them enough for us to strike with minimal casualties. And returning fire ceased just a week ago.

"We are at a turning point in our war with that troublesome kingdom! With a full company of Tudor knights at our disposal, this will be over by evening! In the name of the Empire, let us fight!"

He received a full onslaught of cheers almost all around. The name of Tudor meant nothing for us who were "Dead." Also, a concern came from his speech, one that I made sure to make known,

"I thought the request sent out stated that it was a three day siege?"

Any excitement quickly died down from all the mercenaries. The facade of the Noble's stature appeared to have faltered for but a moment. He looked at me with a neutral expression, trying to hide any anger towards me. His eyes still gave way to how he really felt.

"Y-yes, those papers were sent out three months ago. That was under the assumption they had little strength to hold this place while most of Midland was occupied on other fronts. Clearly we didn't anticipate such strong resilience from its citizens. So we sent the same posters we had made prior, and felt there was little need to edit them due to the urgency."

I nodded at that information and dared myself to ask one more, "And how do we know for sure they aren't playing possum?"

"... I beg your pardon?"

I coughed a little, "Forgive me, it's a saying where I'm from. Pertaining to a little rodent that plays dead exceptionally well. So I'll say it again, how do we know they only let you see them sick?"

This was as far as I would go in questioning him, or his emotions would cause him to arrest us or worse.

"I-I suppose they could be faking, however you are ignoring the key facts. It has been three months, they have had no resupply, and we have been blasting them annually. I still don't know how they lasted as long as they have. Whatever the reason, things come to an end sooner or later."

His last line hit a little close to home,

"...Fair enough."

"If that is all, we can begin discussing the plan of action. Follow me over the hill."

He proceeded to guide us up to see the battlefield. It was much like the grassland that we had trekked through earlier. Only sitting in the middle of it was what would be described as a semi large and old castle beaten by artillery. The castle alone would have been a sight of awe, if it wasn't for the remnants of skirmishes on the field being left to rot. A few barricades of some military and wagons left by civilians were broken in shambles, corpses left to rot in and beside them.

I couldn't tell anymore from the distance, but I was positive that anyone who would try to clear any of that up would end up joining them.

The Noble spoke, uncaring about what was before him, "As you can see, the efforts of our empire have led to many casualties for us. All for this attack. And it will be a victory. We will send in a small group of our forces in a few minutes, they will be under the guise of scouts testing their defenses. If we are lucky, they will all focus on them. After which, the main force will move in on all sides.

"The Band of Nobles will be that force. Being worth half a thousand, it shouldn't be too much of a problem…"

I dreaded the words that came out of the pompous man as I felt a bead of sweat roll down from my forehead.

He had us trapped, putting my words to the full test. I looked to my old gang members who had a similar expression as to what was asked of us. The children weren't any better, even Guts seemed to crack slightly at the orders.

… Again, I have pulled us closer to death,

And I will not be unpunished…

End Chapter