Hagrid who just brutally murdered Dumbledores passionate lover of 6 months Argus Filch.
"Hagrid why did you kill my Argus!" Dumbledore cried as tears ran down his face.Hagrid let off a pirate laugh. "I couldn't stand you two, made me throw up everytime I saw you fuckers!" Hagrid roared. Hagrid continued to rant on his displeasure of Dumbledore and Filch. While Hagrid was distracted Dumbledore pulled out his wiz phone and texted his brother Aberforth for help.Soon Hagrid came out of his rant and pulled out a large machete from his coat and began advancing on Dumbledore. This is exactly what Dumbledore wanted as Hagrid backed him up against the wall. All of a sudden the wall slid open and Aberforth rescued Dumbledore. Hagrid roared and threw his machete into the wall."Ooo Aberforth you saved my life!" Dumbledore beamed as he began to kiss up his brothers neck."Gotta help my brother it's what Filch would of wanted!' Aberforth belched as the two brothers began making love to each other.Meanwhile back in Dumbledores office:Hagrid was still pissed that Dumbledore escaped. All of a sudden Snape entered the headmaster office."There there Hagrid we still have a way to get Dumbledore out of here." Snape said boredly."Huh?" Hagrid moaned."We have the tapes of Dumbledores shower cam footage , apparently he's been watching the students shower, We present these to the ministry and Dumbeldore goes to Azkaban." Snape snarled."That old coot has it coming!" Hagrid roaredThe hogshead:Albus and Aberforth Dumbledore were having a double date with Molly and Arthur Weasley.Albus and Aberforth were feeling each other up as the 2 Dumbledores were enjoying lady and the tramping Aberforths famous Mozzarella sticks. Meanwhile Molly and Arthur Weasley were belching lovingly at each other while they were feeding each other Burgers."Damn Aberforth you make a mean Angus burger!" Molly belched with a mouthful of chewed up burger, slightly unsettling the 2 Dumbledores."Family Recipe!" Aberforth cracked as Dumbledore began kissing Aberforth hard on the mouth as two began making love , as the rest of the customers began fleeing hogshead.Eventually Albus spoke up."Ahh Molly when I fire Hagrid Tomorrow I want you to take over as game keeper!" Dumbledore belched as Molly grinned evilly .