Author's Note – Here is the final chapter, I hope you enjoyed.
Jack stepped onto the ramp with Daniel at his side. He was as quiet as he had been since he'd returned from Chulak and on Abydos, except with Skaara.
Daniel and Skaara talked a lot when they were together, Kasuf had nodded sagely reminding Jack that sometimes brothers were found. And through Sha're they had found a brother in each other.
Jack sighed as he remembered at one point he was considered a brother by Daniel, but now the gulf between them was bigger than if they didn't know one another.
"How was your trip?" Hammond asked after Daniel headed to the infirmary.
Jack sighed as they walked up to the conference room, "I think it did him good. I know Kasuf and Skaara were happy to see him."
"Do you think he'll stay?"
"I wish I knew," Jack said, leaning against the closest chair, "He barely spoke to me the past few days. The one good thing is he can't leave without us knowing this time, since we're his only way to get back to Egypt."
Hammond stared at him for a moment before saying, "You two were always able to talk, even if it was in a roundabout way that made everyone around you want to knock themselves out."
Jack chuckled thinking back for a moment before replying, "Yes, sir."
"Now go see Dr Fraiser before she sends someone to find you."
With a nod, Jack headed out trying to work out how to start a conversation with his friend.
x
Daniel was released from the infirmary quickly and, after having a shower then changing, he headed to grab food and some coffee so he could retreat to the silence of his room until he could decide what to do now.
Reaching the commissary, Daniel grabbed a few sandwiches with a large mug of coffee but, before he could leave, saw Steven walk in.
"What are you still doing here?" Daniel asked amazed.
Steven shrugged, "I was asked to help go through the Isis and Osiris collection for anything else that could be connected to the Goa'uld, now I know what they are. Dr Owens has recommended to Hammond to give me a job."
"Well, you know your subject," Daniel stated, "But there is no glory here. No fame. It's not for everyone."
"I'm getting that," Steven noted, "But Sarah is trapped with one of those things inside her being made to do God knows what. This gives me a way to help her."
Daniel nodded and started out the commissary. He turned back when Steven grabbed his arm.
"I never thanked you for keeping me alive," Steven said softly, "If you hadn't been there, I wouldn't have made it."
Daniel sighed, "I'm just sorry I couldn't save Sarah."
"That wasn't something you could do," Steven reminded him, "Not on your own. And I'm just relieved that we're both here."
Daniel nodded softly, "Me too.
"If you decide to leave, make sure you say goodbye this time," Steven said, offering his hand
Daniel gave a slight smile, shaking the offered hand, "I will."
Retreating to his room, putting his food and mug on the bedside cabinet Daniel sat on the bed exhausted.
x
Jack stood outside Daniel's room and took a deep breath. This was the conversation that they needed to have, and he was not looking forward to it. Talking about feelings was not something he did, neither did Daniel, but for some reason the two of them could communicate.
Tapping the door, he heard the soft call allowing him in and opened the door. Daniel was sitting on the bed, leaning against the headboard sipping a mug of what Jack assumed was coffee. A plate with some crumbs left on it on the cabinet beside Daniel let Jack know he didn't need to make his friend eat.
"Hey," he started the conversation.
Daniel took another swallow of coffee before replying, "Hey."
Silence sat between them as Jack tried to work out how to get into what he wanted to say. Part of him thought he should start a fight because when Daniel got angry, he tended to tell Jack the truth. He also knew that after everything, Daniel needed his friendship more than ever. Isolating him now was not the best idea.
"I spoke with Hammond," Jack said finally, "He has agreed that we can get you back to Egypt in a few days. Give you a chance to get anything you want and to go see Cassie. If you don't do that," Jack continued before Daniel could say anything, "That kid will hunt you down. She's missed you."
"I miss her too," Daniel breathed before asking, "Did she like the presents I sent?"
Jack nodded, "Loved every one of them."
A small smile touched Daniel's lips.
"On the other hand," Jack said, "If you're staying then your apartment is still there, and your office is waiting for you. Not to mention your place on SG1."
"I don't know if…"
"Daniel…"
"I blame you," Daniel suddenly blurted out.
Jack grimaced but remained silent, as Daniel stared at the floor unable to look at him.
"I blame you for sending the message that meant I uncovered the Stargate," Daniel finally continued, "That meant Apophis was able to come and steal her, that led to her being put through things..." He paused as tears filled his eyes, "That meant she died in my arms."
"Daniel…"
"I'm so angry," Daniel snapped, "And a lot of that is at you. I wish it wasn't, and I wish I could just move beyond it, but I haven't been able to. I hate you. I hate Hammond. I hate Sam and Teal'c. I hate this place. And I hate me."
Jack took a slow breath before he replied, "I remember that feeling, I remember it well and it means you push everyone away. It leaves you alone."
"I'm used to being alone," Daniel whispered.
Jack finally reached out and rested his hand on Daniel's arm, "The thing is you don't have to be. I tried it, in fact I was ready to end everything until you came into my life and forced me to see beyond my grief."
Daniel was silent but didn't move away from Jack.
"I didn't know Sha're well," Jack continued, "But I do know she loved you. I saw it the moment she kissed you after Ra was killed, the way she smiled during your wedding and how she looked at you when we came back that day. Sha're loved you and she wouldn't want you to be alone, she wouldn't want you to cut yourself off from the people who care about you."
Daniel nodded, a tear slipping down his cheek as he looked at the floor.
"You don't have to rejoin SG1," Jack told him, "But we need your expertise here in the base, you can come back just to work here." He paused before continuing, "What I'm suggesting is you can work while easing yourself back into being around your friends once more. I mean Ferretti might try to get you to join SG2, but there will be no pressure."
Daniel looked up at Jack, "No pressure?"
"I promise," Jack told him.
"Uncle Daniel!"
Catching the excited teenager in his arms, Daniel hugged Cassandra tightly.
"You look wonderful," Daniel said as he set her down, "So grown up now."
"I missed you," she said, wrapping her arms around his waist again and hugging him tightly.
Daniel wrapped an arm around his adopted niece's shoulders, "I missed you too."
When she finally let him go, Daniel moved them inside Janet's house, took a seat on the couch and waited for her to sit with him.
"Tell me everything you've been doing," Daniel said.
Cassie grinned and gave him a rundown of the highlights of her past few years, she was cheerful, but Daniel could tell how disappointed she'd been that he hadn't been there to witness these moments with the rest of her family.
When they'd found Cassie on the planet, orphaned, alone and scared, Daniel had felt a kinship to her. When the discussion began on what would happen to her, Daniel had been very vocal about her not being thrown into the system and would have adopted her himself if need be.
Thankfully, Janet opened her home to Cassie and Daniel became her uncle, able to give her advice, to help her learn to fit into a new home on a different planet from the one she'd lived all her life and to be a sounding board for her worries.
"Did you like the presents I sent you?" Daniel asked once Cassie finished.
"They were beautiful," Cassie replied, before noting, "But I would have preferred you to be here."
Daniel winced, "I know. I just…" he sighed, "I needed some time away."
"I never got to tell you I'm sorry about Sha're," Cassie squeezed his hand, "I wanted to be able to hug you when I heard."
Closing his eyes to force his voice to remain steady, Daniel replied, "I'll take the hug now."
Cassie wrapped her arms around him again, squeezing him tightly.
"Are you leaving again?" Cassie asked.
Daniel sighed, "I'm not sure. But I promise you, I won't disappear this time and I will keep in touch."
"With more than gifts," she stated firmly.
Daniel nodded and assured her, "With more than gifts."
x
The knock on the door made Hammond look up and he smiled to see the young man standing there.
"Come in, Dr Jackson," he motioned Daniel to take a seat, "I was wondering when I would see you."
Daniel sat down, "I needed to think for a bit before I came to talk to you."
"And have you made a decision regarding what you wish to do?"
"I joined the Stargate programme to find my wife," Daniel reminded him, "And I did. Just not in the way I hoped."
Hammond nodded, "I know. I wished for a different outcome, Dr Jackson. We all did. And I understand why you left. When I lost my wife, I wished to be anywhere but near those who would try to make me talk. Who'd push me to grieve when I wasn't ready to."
A soft smile touched Daniel's lips, relieved at the understanding of how he felt.
"I was broken when I left," Daniel whispered, "And I still am but after what happened to Sarah, someone else I know and care for, I can't just abandon her."
Hammond smiled slightly, "Does that mean you will be coming back?"
"I can't rejoin SG1," Daniel told him, "At least not yet. Right now, I'm still sorting my head out and I need that divide. I need space from the others for a while."
"Well, there is a great deal of work required in your department and," Hammond gave a slight smile, "Dr Edmonds will be extremely grateful to no longer be in charge."
"Thank you, sir," Daniel stated, "I do need to return to Egypt to collect some items that I…"
He trailed off as Hammond brought out his journal from Abydos and his photograph of Sha're from his drawer.
"Colonel O'Neill retrieved these when he and Teal'c were in Egypt looking into where you were," Hammond told him, "Along with the rest of your things."
"I should have known," Daniel said.
"Your office is waiting for you, Dr Jackson," Hammond told him, "And your apartment is too."
Taking his things Daniel stood and started out, turning back when Hammond called his name once more.
"Welcome home, Daniel," Hammond said with a smile, "We've missed you."
With a slight nod, and shy smile, Daniel left the office.
Smiling, Hammond picked up his phone and said the moment it was answered, "Our lost sheep has returned."
Daniel lay in his bed back in his apartment amazingly still here after two years. He looked over to where Sha're should be, in a bed she'd never slept in, in an apartment that had never been graced by her presence.
Turning to the other side, he studied the picture he had of her. The only one there was that still somehow captured her spirit and the warmth that he'd always felt in her presence.
"I never thought being married would be so…" Sha're hesitated before finishing, "Enjoyable."
Daniel laughed leaning on his elbow as he lay beside her, gazing at her tousled long black hair, her skin glowing. Trailing his fingers along her arm, he whispered, "Me neither."
"I always wondered," Sha're whispered, her fingers running through his hair, "Would my husband be someone I liked, I never believed I would love him."
Daniel grinned, he didn't think he'd smiled so much in his entire life as he had since meeting Sha're, "I love you too."
Kissing him, Sha're slid closer, and her warm body pressed against his once more. When they parted, Sha're rested her head against his shoulder, her arm resting over his waist as his arm wrapped around her shoulders, his hand played with her curls while his other hand gently stroked her arm.
He'd never felt like this before and all he could see was a future with Sha're in his arms.
Daniel wondered what she would think of him these days, if she would have remained his wife after everything that had happened. But the more he thought about that, the more he knew that if things had been different then they would have got through it together because they made each other better.
Sha're laughed, unable to stop herself as she looked at the mess Daniel had made of the flour he'd been trying to grind.
"You don't have to laugh so hard," he frowned before, unable to stop himself, he began to laugh as well, "I guess I need some practice."
"Yes, you do," she kissed him, "You have many talents, my love," Sha're reminded him, amusement in her voice, "This is not one."
Daniel rolled his eyes and dabbed her nose with flour making her laugh some more.
Laughter bubbled up as Daniel thought back and realised what he'd been denying himself the past few years only focussing on when he lost her and not the life they'd shared. Sha're loved life, she loved him, she had a wicked sense of humour and although she was gone, he was not alone. The memories he held of her, the joy she'd given him, and the love she held for him still existed and he had a purpose.
The creatures that had taken her from him were still out there and he could fight them.
He would.
Maybe not in the way he had before at the moment, but he would still fight.
And live.
For her.