Chapter 7: Heartbreak and Moving On
1 Year Later
Iz'phal felt like a princess. Every other day after work Alexia would take her out, they'd go to the clubs on the upper side of Coruscant, take her out for dinner and worshipped the ground she walked on. Their relationship had progressed steadily over the last year and having gained a promotion at work to Chief Executive everything was just where it was supposed to be. However, the last few weeks had felt different. With the new title came multiple responsibilities, management of teams and she found herself working late, sometimes until midnight, sometimes sleeping in the office. She felt guilt for not spending time with him. She always messaged him when she was going to be back late or when she couldn't make it home and every time he responded with affection and understanding, making the nights they had together more special. Now a girl of eighteen years she was incredibly mature for her age and was aware of the world around her now and the dangers than she ever had been. He always showed up to the office at least twice a week with a dish from her favourite restaurant or berry mulch, making sure she was okay. However, the last few days had been different. He hadn't responded to her messages or holocalls. Naturally she was concerned but she pushed it away, knowing he was probably tired from his own shifts at the bank or busy with his other friends.
Something had been gnawing at her all day a nauseous feeling crept into her stomach. Again, he hadn't been answering her messages, and she wanted some answers. Five days without a reply, word or visit from him and she was beginning to wonder. Have I done something wrong? Is he upset with me? I haven't been spending enough time with him, and I miss him. Maybe I should go home early…Apologise for not being there…God damn promotion…Iz'phal sighed as yes it was making her more money but it was possibly ruining her relationship and social life. Deciding to call a night, she clocked off early, the night watchman, a gran at the spacious desk showing her out as she knew what would cheer him up as she walked home, passing her favourite sweet shop. She grabbed two large steaming cups of caffeine and sugary rings, knowing that would put a smile on his face, just wanting to see him happy and spend a lovely evening together. As she walked home she called him but again his holo frequency went to messaging. Shrugging it away she got the front door of her apartment and caught the lift, opening the front door shrugging off her work coat and called his name.
"Al sweetheart I'm home. I brought you something…" Iz'phal said sweetly as she dumped her bag and coat on the chair and called him again after no response. "Al? You home?" she asked again and no answer. Curious she wondered into the living room, but her heart froze when she realised that someone else was here. Fury ran through her veins as she spotted Alexia's blazer thrown on the couch but another shirt and coat unfamiliar to her was unbuttoned next to it. Iz'phal spied an empty bottle of wine and two glasses on the table and immediately her blood ran cold. She assumed the worst as she spied the door to the bedroom open a fraction and heard sounds, sounds that made her uncomfortable. This is why he wasn't answering my calls…He's with someone else…The womp rat…Iz'phal thought bitterly as she pushed open the door and froze in shock, eyes wide, tears immediately forming in her eyes as she saw another woman in her bed, human by the looks of things but that didn't matter, it was another woman, enjoying herself by the sounds of things and in her arms was…They were both fully unclothed, whispering words to each other that she couldn't catch, sharing intimacies with each other and she backed away, tears falling down her face.
"Oh god…" Iz'phal choked as she put a hand to her mouth and immediately the blue skinned male twi'lek saw her, saw his Iz'phal from under the woman's arm and instantly knew he'd made a terrible mistake. "I can't believe you would…" Her voice a mere tremble before she found her confidence and shouted, eyes narrowed into slits at him. "I gave you everything. I work my behind off for you and this is how you treat me. We're done!" Iz'phal finished that sentence as cutting as she wanted it as she grabbed her coat and stormed from the room, the strange woman left shocked as immediately Alexia ordered her to get her things and leave as he bolted from the room, covering up by pulling on his shirt and trousers as he ran, nearly falling over them in a bid to get to her. He was almost able to lay a hand on her when she spun on her heel, her face a mask of anger, slapping his hand away from her arm. "Don't touch me Al! I said we're done!" Iz'phal snarled as he tried again to say something, but she pushed him away taking the elevator down the apartment block to head outside, head reeling. All that friendship, the bond they hand, all that love he'd shown her, one big lie. He was no different. Just like all the men in the galaxy, heartless. As she began her walk down the street outside in the light rain she just needed to clear her head, to get some air before she passed out. Before she could form a clearer picture in her head of what's she'd just seen Alexia ran through the door, calling her name over and over, urgency etched on his dark blue face, tears in his eyes.
"Izzy stop, please stop. Things went too far. We need to talk…Izzy sweetheart I'm sorry!" Alexia apologised frantically, knowing forgiveness from her was going to be difficult and he had probably lost the most special thing ever in his life…Her.
"We need to do more than just talk! Al, I thought you loved me?!" Iz'phal cried, tears flowing down her face as she continued to stride away from him, make up running down her cheeks, black smudged around her eyes as suddenly she stormed towards him screaming in his face. "Who was she Al?" Iz'phal demanded fiercely as he tried to calm her down but Iz'phal wasn't going to back down.
"Izzy girl, please I'm sorry. I didn't mean for things to go this far! I regret everything that just happened. Nothing actually happened beyond kissing and contact I promise…Izzy please sweetheart…" Alexia pleaded as he grabbed onto her arm, but she shrugged him away, glaring daggers his way.
"Don't you sweetheart me! Who was she? Who the hell was she?!" Iz'phal shouted as he raised his voice to get through to her, but he knew he was in the wrong.
"She is no one Izzy. She is just an old friend darling. We shared a bottle and I made a mistake, Izzy I'm so sorry please forgive me sweetheart…" Alexia pleaded as he reached her and pulled her into an embrace as Iz'phal initially fought against him but collapsing against his chest, sobbing bitterly, clenching her fists in rage.
"It's because I haven't been around isn't it. That's what you 've been ignoring my calls. You were with her. You don't love me…If you did you wouldn't have done this…" Iz'phal choked, tears pouring down her face as he cradled her against him, thinking of the best way to apologise but he had cheated on her but also couldn't bear life without her in it and got a horrible feeling that she wouldn't forgive him…That he had lost her.
"Izzy sweetheart please that is not true…I got drunk and made a mistake…Izzy please this wasn't meant to happen…I love you Iz, more than anything. You're my life…Darling please…" Alexia begged as he clung to her, his fingers trailing down her lekku, pressing his forehead to hers as he did everything, everything to stop her leaving him.
"How can you love me…You bought her home…In our bed…I thought you were different Al…You promised me…I can't do this Al. We're over…We're over…" Iz'phal cried, the heartbreak she felt almost tearing her in two. She thought he was different but obviously not. Even if it was a mistake it was something she couldn't forgive. She was done.
"Izzy please don't do this. I love you…I'm not living without you!" Alexia clung onto her, trying to gage her eye contact but she pushed him away, walking off into the rain.
"Get your stuff and get out! We're over! I never want to see you again!" Iz'phal shouted as leaving him shocked and heartbroken she pulled her coat around her as the rain began to thicken, needing a friend, anyone who could help her. She knew one person as she head to the upper levels of Coruscant, hailing a sky cab. It was time to pay her old friend Khaled a visit.
Two days after the incident her world had fallen apart. She kept looking to the rack expecting to see his coat there. She kept hearing his loving voice in her head, remembering all the lovely moments they'd shared together in the year that their relationship had lasted and admitted not having him in her life was painful. She had to be stronger than ever. He'd cheated on her, she'd taken the moral high ground and walked away but not having another person in the apartment made her lonely and it was enough to drag her into the pit of sadness every now and again. Making herself a cup of special brew a memory came to the surface of her mind as she remembered the vacation on Alderann he had booked for her birthday. It was a lovely weekend, full of activity and romantic. Now he was gone, and she was crestfallen. Part of her still had feelings for him, just wanted to forgive him and take him back but the reality was simple…She had lost that trust she'd had for him. It was true one mistake was easy to forgive but he could very well go back on his word and do it again. She couldn't control the emotion as she placed both hands on the counter and began to cry, tears pouring down her cheeks and dripping down her chin. She admitted she still loved him but needed to get over that, needed to stop seeing his face, those beautiful eyes that pulled her in. She was about to sip from the mug of brew she'd made, tears falling down her face when the intercom sounded. She was expecting anyone but could have made a guess at who it was. She was tempted not to answer it but as she groomed her lekku in the mirror and considered her options she wanted to see his face even if it was for one last time, just to glimpse his eyes again and their loving depths before she ended it properly. They needed to both be dignified and walk away but he wouldn't. He loved her too much to let her go but Iz'phal wouldn't be walked over like that ever again. He'd had her chance with her and he'd blown it. If he'd truly loved her, drunk or not he would have pushed that woman away and not crossed the line. She couldn't find it in her heart to forgive him, even as a friend. She put on a brave face and pushed the button to release the door.
Five minutes later Alexia strode into her apartment carrying a bottle of expensive looking vintage and a bouquet of ri'shi flowers, twi'lek in origin and her favourite. Sighing as she knew why he'd come to see her, she slumped down on the couch, the mug of brew in her hands, face a mask of annoyance, flipping her lekku over her shoulder. Iz'phal refused to give him eye contact, refused to look at the man who'd broken her heart.
"Izzy please I'm your friend, the least you can do is say hello!" Alexia snapped, like a wire had fused in his brain as she glowered at him shaking her head, spying the bottle of vintage and flowers he'd placed on the table and knew he expected forgiveness.
"What gives you the nerve to come and speak to me when I said specifically we were done. I don't want to see you!" Iz'phal growled as she took her tablet from the side cabinet and flicked through the daily Coruscant holonet feeds, blatantly ignoring him, not caring what he had to say. Nothing he could say would change her mind or justify his actions to her.
"Izzy please just let me speak…You can't just walk out on me like this. You're seriously going to throw all we had away just because of a mistake I made. Come on girl don't be stupid…I love you damn it!" Alexia rose his voice at her then, frustrated as Iz'phal suddenly jumped to her feet, jaw muscles tensed in anger, glaring at him.
"Don't you dare bring me into this! You're the one who's thrown this away. I trusted you Al. I loved you with all my heart and you cheat on me. Do you honestly think I want to be with you after the way you've treated me?! I'm the best you'll ever have, and you've lost me…" Iz'phal told him the truth, cold and sharp as a blade of steel as he sat down on the couch, eyes pleading with a desperate expression.
"Izzy sweetheart please, I want to try and sort us out. You're the only girl I want in my life Iz and I was stupid and make a mistake. You're my first girl in almost ten years and I slipped up. All I want is another chance. I want to mend things over Izzy…Please darling…" Alexia coaxed warmly, at first she was pulled in by his lulling, loving voice, compelled to come closer to him. He reached for her hand, but she pushed his arm away, brooding in silent contemplation. "Sweetheart please…I want us to start over…I can't tell you how sorry I am Iz. Please believe me when I say I'm sorry I mean it from the bottom of my heart…I never meant for it to go that far. She was a friend in need and wanted my help, we used to work together in transactions and she'd just lost her sister to a rare blood disorder. I wanted to help her, but it went too far. Izzy…" he succeeded in holding her hand, rubbing his thumb over her knuckles in a soothing gesture as his touch made her contemplate going back to him. Perhaps he had just made a mistake. His apology seemed genuine, but she'd been hurt, by the best friend and man she'd ever knew and sadly she knew she could never forgive him. "Girl she means nothing to me, seriously…" He was about to continue when she spoke up. She appreciated his honesty about what had happened that night when the lights were low, and another woman's clothes were in her apartment and another woman was in her bed with her man, but that image unsettled her even more.
"If she meant nothing to you why did you sleep with her? If you loved me, you wouldn't have done that regardless of what you'd drunk. Al, I appreciate you coming to see me and all but if that's all you have to say I can't help you. What we had was precious to me but now I can't trust you. You say you love me, but I don't know if you mean it anymore…" Iz'phal cried, biting her bottom lip as tears flowed down her cheeks, letting down her guard in his embrace, pressing her cheek to his chest.
"Sweetheart, Izzy please don't cry. My Izzy please don't cry. None of this is your fault. What I did is unforgiveable, and I will never forgive myself for what I did to you. I regretted it and kicked her out as soon as you got home…I lost my head Iz and can't reverse time and take it back, but we can move on Iz. Please…Darling I don't expect your forgiveness, but I want you with me. I can't see my life without you in it…Please…" Alexia almost begged her, running a soothing hand over her shoulder and forearm. Iz'phal was almost hypnotised by his low tone and loving words but snapped out of the trance as she pushed him away, croaking a response as she lowered her head and walked away sheepishly.
"Al I can't…I loved you, but you hurt me too much. It's over…I'm sorry…" Iz'phal held in her tears as devastated and crestfallen he got to his feet, trying to plead with the expression in his eyes but she wasn't having it, looking longingly at her but it now meant nothing.
"Izzy please…girl I…" Alexia tried one last time, but she held up a hand, placing her right palm to her mouth staring down at her feet.
"Just go…I don't want to see you…" Iz'phal sniffed as knowing he had to walk away, even if they didn't part as friends he turned on his heel and waited for the elevator to the lower level as his voice was choked with emotion, truly remorseful for what he'd done and now he'd lost the girl of his heart.
"I hope we can at least be friends Izzy…Please think about it…" Alexia said in a defeatist voice as the doors closed behind him leaving a stunned and emotionally drained Iz'phal standing alone, thinking to herself. She spied the beautiful flowers from the corner of her eye and the vintage and knew he was sorry, meant every bit of his apology but the reality was she couldn't forgive him and wasn't sure anything could be mended, their relationship was certainly gone but she struggled to envisage having a friendship with him anymore. It broke her heart to know that the one person who had always been there for her was gone and it was a cruel blow. Thinking on how to get the dreadful morning and events of the last few days from her head she clipped the flowers and put them in water before going through her family photo album, all happy twi'leks on their homestead living a quiet and peaceful life. She needed her family, but they couldn't help her, so she needed to be strong…Perhaps make some new friends…Take a change of career. As she contemplated her chores for the rest of the day, mug cupped in her hands she thought of the journey she would have to make to work this evening and with Alexia there it would be a long and arduous task. She wasn't look forward to it.