Then the moment was over. When Remus removed his gaze from Sirius's fingers to look at his face instead, the other boy's expression had changed. His grey eyes were still pointed downwards to his hand, but his gaze was empty, as if he wasn't really paying attention. His smile had faded and been replaced by pained frown.
"Hey," Remus said softly, reaching out to let his hand curl around Sirius' arm in comfort. "What are you thinking about?"
Sirius finally looked up, his glassy eyes meeting Remus'.
"I'm sorry," he said, his voice shaking slightly. "I just -" Sirius blinked a few times as if holding back tears before he continued. "I just, you know, try to stay away from it all. But he's still my brother, Remus. I can't go back there, even if I wanted to it would be too late now. But I keep picturing him, all alone in that big house, and I guess part of me kind of wishes I had never left, even - "Sirius was spiraling, words spilling out uncontrollably, and Remus interrupted him.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, Sirius." He took a small step forward, reducing the distance between them. "When did the two of you last speak?", he asked softly. He had noticed that something was wrong since summer, but this was the first time, Sirius was actually opening up about it. Though Remus had of course expected Sirius' suffering to be connected to the brother. They had been in conflict for as long as Remus could remember, but they were brothers after all, and leaving Regulus with their parents had not been an easy decision for Sirius. But it had been the right one. Though he had his moments of remorse, Remus had never seen his friend happier than after he moved in with James.
At Remus' question, tears finally started running down Sirius' cheeks. He buried his head in his hands, but Remus removed them, forcing Sirius to look at him while he held his hands. Sirius looked like he would rather be tied to a dying jobberknoll than let Remus see him like this.
"That's the thing," tears still running, his voice was shaking when he finally started speaking. "He has been avoiding me since summer. He hasn't said a word to me this school year, and I've been trying to catch him in the corridors, but he disappears as soon as he sees me!"
Remus pulled Sirius into a hug, and Sirius buried his face in the warm sweater, drowning in the familiar smell of his closest friend. They stood close together, the two friends, by the window illuminated only by the soft orange glow from the fireplace, and Remus lifted his hand to stroke Sirius' head, his fingers running through the thick black locks of hair.
"It's going to be alright," Remus was almost whispering, "I will help you okay? We'll figure something out." Sirius didn't say anything, but kept his face buried in the comfort of the heavy knitted wool. Then he nodded ever so slightly and squeezed his arms around Remus even tighter.