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Getting home from Paris felt strange. His room was the same, but Charlie thought maybe he might be different. How, he couldn't have said, but he felt like he and Nick had become … more boyfriends, maybe, than they had been before. Now that people knew, certainly, a lot more opportunities to be together opened up for them.
He lay in his bed the next morning looking at Nick's Instagram post of the two of them and smiling.
Or, at least, he was smiling until a text showed itself at the top of his screen. "saw Nick's post, can we talk?" From Ben.
Charlie swiped the text away, but he wished he could swipe the memory of it—and of Ben himself—away as easily. He remembered what Nick had said, that Ben thought he could get Charlie back. Like he was a prize to be won, like he wasn't even a person. Would Ben ever have held his hand and asked him to promise to talk to him when he wasn't feeling well? Would Ben have dragged him across Paris to meet his father? Never. There was no comparison.
A light knock came to his door, and Charlie froze. It wasn't like his parents to seek him out to talk, but neither of them had seemed particularly happy when he told them Nick had come out to people on the trip, so … it was possible.
Then Tori's voice came through the door. "Have your MarioKart skills atrophied, spending all that time on the Continent?"
"No."
"Prove it."
Charlie threw off his covers and climbed out of bed, opening the door to see her standing there with that little smile on her face. "You might as well give it up. You'll never beat me."
"I beat you last time."
"You hid my controller!"
"Yes, and then I won."
"By cheating."
"Still winning," Tori argued.
They got two games in before she asked about the Paris trip.
"You should've come," Charlie told her. "It was really fun."
"My summer is for sleeping, not visiting old museums."
On the screen, he hit her car with a booby trap. Growling, she grabbed the controller, messing up his game. "Stop it!"
Then his phone chimed, and Charlie took his attention off the game long enough to look at it. Nick, asking if Charlie's family would like to come to a dinner party at his house while his dad was in town.
He explained to Tori, who rolled her eyes. "Wow. Mum will love that."
"What d'you mean?"
"She's not exactly Nick's biggest fan, is she?"
No. That was true. But that was because his mum barely knew Nick. When she saw him more, when she met Sarah and saw how nice their house was, she would think differently. "Well, maybe this will help her see how great he is," Charlie suggested.
His phone chimed again, and he looked to see what adorable thing Nick had said, only to find another message from Ben, this one telling him that Ben knew he'd seen his first message. And then another from Ben saying they needed to talk.
It was like being locked in a dark, cold room, all alone, feeling as if no one would ever love him. Charlie knew better, of course he did—but the feeling came, all the same.
Charlie looked at the messages, then looked at Tori, waiting for her to say something, but she kept silent. They went back to the game, Tori leaning against his shoulder in her comfy bathrobe, as if to remind him that he didn't have to be with Ben anymore, that he had people who truly cared for him.
They stopped playing when Tori got bored of losing, and Charlie finally went and took a shower and sat down to play drums. Sometimes drums were for bad days, when he was feeling down; but other times, drums were for good times, when he was feeling confident and cool and able to do anything. Despite Ben, this was one of the good times.
When he paused for a bit, he scrolled Instagram, just to see if he'd missed anything, and a post popped up from Elle. Her art was being displayed at Lambert the following week, in a proper art show. She asked all of them to come along.
Their group was blowing up her comments section already, and Charlie added his "wow!" He wondered if this meant she had gotten into the school, and how Tao would feel about that. Charlie wasn't even dating Elle, and it felt strange to think she might go away as soon as next year. Tao must be terrified. Charlie could barely consider Nick going off to uni, and that was still two years away.
Tao's response came in, asking if she'd gotten a place, and Elle said she hadn't heard yet. But having her art displayed in a show for them had to mean she had a good chance of getting in.
Elle's next comment came in: "We NEED to go shopping for art exhibition outfits"
Darcy responded, "omg AND prom outfits!"
Then Tao asked how they were supposed to get to Lambert, and Charlie immediately suggested they take a train together. "paris squad day out!" Did they qualify as a squad? He certainly hoped so. He'd always wanted to be part of a squad.
That suggestion got a lot of approving emojis, so it was decided. They'd all take the train to the art exhibit, and before that, they'd go shopping for new outfits. Charlie had assumed that was only the girls, but they seemed to think the boys would come, too. Maybe he would get something new. Something that made him feel the way he felt when Nick was looking at him with that lopsided smile and that warmth in his eyes.
Much as he liked being alone with Nick, the idea that they had friends they could go out with, together, all in a group, was pretty awesome, too.
The group of them walked through the shopping district, separated into couples, busily talking over the art show and the prom and what they would wear. Nick wanted a nice suit, maybe in grey, which Charlie thought would look nice … but felt awfully grown up and stiff for the Nick he knew.
Then, over all the babble, came Isaac's voice. "Guys." When they all turned to look at him, Charlie realised that it hadn't been a group of them—it had been three couples, with Isaac trailing behind them. He felt bad about that. Isaac shouldn't have to walk by himself just because he wasn't in a couple. Isaac was smiling at all of them, though, as he continued, "Um, I'm going to catch up with you in a bit. I said I'd meet up with James."
"Oh, my God, they're going to kiss!" Darcy exclaimed. She was such a matchmaker.
"Good luck!" Charlie called.
"Have fun," Nick added, taking Charlie's hand again. Right here in the street, too.
Isaac walked away from all of them. Charlie wondered, a bit—even for him, Isaac had been quiet lately. But then Nick squeezed his hand and started asking him what he might want to wear to prom, and he forgot all about it.