Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word
The five days that Logan spent attached to the chest tube, suctioning out air and fluid from his lungs, were the longest of Clay's life. His mother tried to make him go home and relax more than once, with no luck. On the fifth day since his hospitalization, the sedation was finally reduced, and doctors were able to remove the tube. His parents sat on either side of the bed, Quinn squeezing Logan's fingers while Clay stroked his hair. "That cop deserves hell for this," Clay muttered, staring at his son's face as if needing to memorize every detail in the next few minutes.
"It all comes back to Katie." Quinn's eyes flashed dangerously, even as she kissed Logan's hand, trying to anchor him to the living world. "There's no limit to what she's inflicted on our family."
"I can't believe I ever called her Sara." Clay shook his head in disbelief. "Blonde hair can't change the fact that she's a psychotic bitch!"
"You said a swear." Logan's voice was a hoarse whisper, so sudden that Quinn dropped his hand with a start. She gripped Clay's fingers instead, stroking his hair when his head pressed into Logan's covers, the relief bringing too many emotions to the surface to hold back.
"It's allowed today," Quinn told him, smiling through her own tears.
"We missed you," Clay added fervently. "I love you so much. Are you okay? Do you remember what happened?"
"Not really." Logan tried to shift slightly and winced immediately. "My chest hurts, Daddy."
"I know it does, baby. We'll get you something for the pain." Clay clutched his son's fingers as if his life depended on it. "You're gonna be okay, I promise."
"I have to go call Haley," said Quinn quickly. She dropped another lingering kiss on Logan's forehead. "Everyone's been so worried about you, Wolverine."
Proving her point, both Logan's grandmothers swept into the room in unison, with Sam behind them. Lil moved to where Quinn had been while Marie paused behind Clay and squeezed his shoulders. "I told you he's tough. Reminds me a lot of his father," she said pointedly.
"I'm not so sure about that right now," said Clay glumly. "You scared me half to death, kid. Leave the getting shot to me from now on, please!"
"That's not funny," Logan objected, sitting up slowly. He leaned into his father's desperate hug while Marie held one of his hands captive in her trembling grasp. "I'm…I'm okay, I promise." But Clay's quip about getting shot had brought a feeling of unease rushing back to the front of Logan's mind. "Bobby's aunt did this? The one who shot you, too?" he asked, the disbelief and shock apparent in the question.
"Kind of," Clay hedged. "She was aiming for one of the cops in your classroom, and the bullet ricocheted. I think it was that Bobby kid's father. You weren't the target, but that doesn't make it okay!"
"The important thing is that you're okay now," Marie said as if to remind everyone. "You got so lucky, honey. Thank goodness for small mercies!"
Leaving Logan surrounded by the warmth of his grandparents' love, Quinn slipped quietly out of the room. She had her phone in her hand and was dialing Haley's number when a voice said her name. "Mrs. Evans?" Quinn reluctantly tucked her cell phone away and nodded. Melissa Riley stood before her, looking as sickly as Quinn felt. "I don't even know where to start. An apology doesn't seem enough for what happened in that classroom."
"I would say not," Quinn growled. "Your husband almost killed my son! What was he thinking, bringing a loaded gun to an elementary school presentation?"
"He was only thinking of putting Katie in her place," said Melissa miserably. "Nobody meant for Logan to get hurt. It was an accident!"
"I'll tell you what wasn't accidental," said Quinn in a dangerously low voice. "The fact that Katie intentionally stayed off her meds and attacked me twice! It wasn't okay back then either, but now I have my family to consider. She better stay the hell away from us!" Melissa's stricken expression seemed to dull the edges of Quinn's razor-sharp rage, and she sighed. But before she could say anything else, Bobby inched out from behind his mother.
"Mrs. Evans, could you give Logan something from me?" he asked softly. "I know he doesn't like me very much. With good reason…but what happened today was too much. I'm sorry that I took out all my issues on him. He said the other day I should have just told him about my dad being absolutely nuts. I'm sorry that I couldn't. I didn't mean what I said about his mommy leaving him on purpose. I'm just…sorry for all of it." He handed Quinn a messily wrapped box and took a few steps back, hovering at his mother's side again. "I sometimes wish my dad would forget about us and disappear," he added softly. "Logan is luckier than he knows, that's all."
"Can I open it?" Quinn asked, more gently now. "I'm not sure if he'll have the energy just yet. The pain meds are still pretty strong right now."
"I guess so," Bobby shrugged, and Quinn carefully peeled back the clumsy wrapping. "It was mine," the boy added, smiling at the Wolverine action figure in her hands. "I remembered he has a thing for X-Men, and Dad controls our money so I couldn't get something new. I just wanted to show how sorry I am for picking on him. Will you give it to him, please? And maybe tell him that?"
"Of course I will." Quinn nodded. "Thank you, Bobby. This is very sweet." She looked up at Melissa, who was biting her lip as if to keep from bursting into tears. "I hope things get better for you soon," she said, her earlier anger dampened by the woman's obvious anguish. "Just please keep your sister away from my family. That's all I ask!" Clutching the action figure, she turned on her heel and slipped back into Logan's room, the earlier intention to call Haley forgotten.
"Where have you been?" Lil asked curiously, looking up when Quinn entered. She was perched beside Logan on the bed, her grandson curled half into her lap, whimpering in his sleep.
"Untangling schoolyard rivalries," said Quinn vaguely. "I guess this can wait." She put Bobby's gift down at the foot of the bed, then gestured at the chairs in the corner with a smile. "The resemblance is uncanny sometimes." Clay was dozing on his mother's shoulder, clinging to her hand in his sleep. "That's a relief."
"For sure," Lil agreed. "I haven't seen Clay this high-strung since the day you lost the baby. I'm so glad the outcome today wasn't quite that tragic. How are you doing, sweetheart?"
"I'm just relieved the worst is over," said Quinn honestly. "I was so scared we'd lose Logan too. No matter what I said in a fit of grief, he's my baby, too."
"He knows that." Sam's gruff voice sounded near the door, and Quinn spun around. Sara's father patted the free chair next to him, and she moved to sit beside him. "Thank you for always keeping us involved, Quinn. We don't take that for granted, you know. It's a privilege to be here to help you through this."
"We wouldn't have it any other way," said Quinn sincerely. "There were times in the last few weeks that I really missed my parents. It's hard to dump all the grief on my kid sister, you know? As soon as I came back to Raleigh, I felt better. Clay is on to something, always running to the cemetery when things get rough. For me, just being around family helped." Her cell phone's vibration in her pocket made Quinn shift reluctantly from Sam's soothing embrace. "Oh God, I totally forgot I meant to call Haley. I'm in for it now. I'll be right back." She slipped out into the now deserted corridor and quickly answered the call. "Hey, Haley Bob."
"Why did I have to hear from Clay's assistant that Logan woke up?" her sister demanded. "What a relief! Is everything okay?"
"He's alright," said Quinn softly, her voice wavering with exhausted relief. "I'm sorry, I meant to call you right away. I got caught up with the mom of Logan's classmate whose husband's gun fired the shot. It's complicated."
"Jesus!" Haley gasped. "You'll have to fill me in on all that later. Can Logan have visitors yet? Jamie misses him so much."
"I think he should be coming home pretty soon," said Quinn optimistically. "Visitors at the beach house might make more sense. Hospitals aren't that restful; everyone is running on fumes here. Clay is an emotional wreck. Give it some time, okay? I love you, Hales."
"Give him a hug from me," said Haley softly. "We love you guys. Call if you need anything, okay?"
"We have the trio of Logan's grandparents taking care of every little thing here," said Quinn gratefully. "Family really is everything. I should go; I'll talk to you later."
Quinn hung up the call and leaned against the wall with a heavy sigh. She was tucking her phone away when Clay's voice made her jump. "Emotional wreck, huh? Thanks for that."
"Hey, you." Quinn straightened up and moved into his waiting arms. "Well, was I wrong? You're a mess. Not that I blame you. This whole thing has been…a lot."
"Yeah." Clay looked like he was searching for words big enough for a moment. Finally, he just pressed his head against her shoulder. "I don't know what I would have done if something happened to him, Q. Or you, for that matter. It's just been a rollercoaster since Christmas."
"It has," Quinn agreed faintly, holding him tightly. "I love you so much. I'm not going anywhere, I promise. We've made it through so much already. We'll get through this too!" She drew back, frowning slightly. "I wonder if anxiety nausea is contagious," she mused. "I don't know why I'm feeling so queasy right now, weird."
"Really?" Clay gave her a concerned look. "You want to try the trick of sipping some water? Callie was a rock before you arrived to pick up the pieces of my hot mess."
"You're my hot mess, Clay Evans. I wouldn't have it any other way."
"Me neither," he whispered, keeping his arms around her as if touching her made him feel more stable. "Did you talk to Haley?"
"Yup." Quinn nodded, smiling again. "She sends her love. I didn't ask if she meant for you or Logan. Let's assume there's enough to go around for everyone."
"Knowing Haley, there is." Clay cracked the door open to Logan's room and walked Quinn back inside. Logan was awake again, and when Lil and Marie relinquished their seats on either side of him to his parents, it was the first time they felt like things were looking up in months.
Quinn reached for the package she had left on the floor at the foot of the bed. "If you're feeling up to it, Wolverine, there's a present for you here. It's from Bobby Ryan."
"Why?" asked her son suspiciously.
"He came by earlier," said Quinn. "He wanted to apologize for what happened at school. I think he really meant it. It sounded like his family has been through a lot lately."
"So has ours," said Logan bitterly. "Jamie says that Bobby is probably just jealous of me. But what he said about Mommy and you really hurt. What do you think I should do, Mama Q?"
"I think," said Quinn slowly. "It couldn't hurt to open the present. He was very apologetic that it's second-hand. It sounds like he wants to make up with you. I'd give him a chance if I were you."
Grimacing slightly, Logan peeled the wrapping off Bobby's gift and examined the Wolverine action figure. "That's really cool," he said in awe. "He always teased me about my name; this doesn't make sense."
"People can change," said Quinn. "I know that better than anyone. Your dad used to have sleepovers with lots of random girls before I came along. If you ever run into the kid of someone named Kylie at school, steer clear of her, trust me."
"Quinn!" Clay groaned and buried his face in his hands at Logan's confused expression. But it was the first time she had heard him laugh in so long; she couldn't regret the teasing. For so long, their elders had been telling her that things would get better, but it finally felt like that could be true.
A/N The end is in sight after a decade of this fic being therapy, damn! xx