A/N: Here is the very late, final chapter of Paramnesia.

Kensi picked up her phone, frowning when she saw a new text from Deeks. He hadn't tried to contact her since she'd left the mission three days ago, which surprised her a little. Apparently he'd decided to honor request to be left alone. She was both glad and disappointed. She let her thumb over the message for almost a minute before she tapped it with a sigh.

"Are you home?"

"Why?"

"Because I'm parked outside your apartment right now."

"Idiot," she muttered under her breath before she finished reading the latest text.

"I figured I should give you a chance to tell me to go to hell. I did bring food."

God, it was such a Deeks thing to do. She almost found herself smiling, but stopped herself before it got out of control. Kensi let him wait for a full five minutes-let him sweat a little-and then walked to the door, yanking it open.

Sure enough his car was parked outside; she could see the outline of his curls even from here. Rolling her eyes, she gestured for him to come in and he opened the car door, but hesitated when he was halfway out.

"Hurry up before I change my mind," she shouted down the sidewalk then walked back into the apartment. In the past few days Kensi had spent a lot of time thinking about just what she'd say the next time they saw each other. Sometimes, especially the first day after he'd told her the truth, it usually involved inflicting various forms of physical violence or shouting that she never wanted to see him again. Then it had morphed into something a little more reasonable and less angry.

Now that he was here, she could honestly say she still had no idea what to say. He made a considerable amount of noise walking in, like she had somehow forgotten he was there.

"Thanks for letting me in," he murmured. "You didn't have to."

"I know." Sighing, Kensi turned to look at him and rolled her eyes as she saw him hesitating in the doorway, clutching a white bag of food. "What, no jokes about how fast I messed the place up again?"

"I don't know, how likely are you to make sure I never have any little Deeks running around if I do?"

"Less than I was three days ago," she told him with a tight smile. "You're lucky I didn't have my gun then."

"Yeah, Kensi I'm-" She held her hand up, cutting him off.

"If we're going to start this conversation then you better be prepared to really talk about it because I'm not doing this more than once."

He nodded, his jaw tense any levity gone, and dropped the bag on her coffee table. She didn't offer him a seat and they awkwardly stood a few feet from each other. It was a stark contrast from a few days ago when being around each other had seemed so natural, at least from her perspective.

"Why did you let me believe a lie for so long?" she asked simply when he remained silent. Better to get it out in the open quickly.

"Your doctor said that we should wait and see if your memory returned to normal on its own," he explained again.

"Really? You want me to believe it didn't occur to you somewhere between me calling you my husband and asking you to crawl into bed with me that the doctor was wrong?"

"You were confused."

"Yes, I was!" she snapped, stalking closer to him. "I woke up in that room all alone, completely disoriented. If you told me I was alien I probably would have believed you. It would have been so easy for you to just say 'Hey Kensi, we're not married.'"

He started to say something and then nodded again, pursing your lips.

"You're right, I should have said something sooner," he said quietly, his voice rough. "I'm so sorry that I didn't."

She felt herself deflate a little. It was obvious that he did regret his actions and now it just left her feeling hollow. After a minute of awkward silence, she edged past Deeks, forcing herself not to touch him in any way, and sat down at the far end of the couch.

It felt so strange to be this distant from him. Normally they were always in each other's hair. Riding the boundary between just friends and something more.

"What would you have done if I didn't ask you about us or if my memory really was impaired?" Deeks mouth opened slightly at her question, shaking his head slightly. He hesitated, shifting on the balls of his feet a couple time, and then crossed over to the couch, sitting beside her. He left several inches between them, but it was closer than they'd been in days.

"I would have told you the truth."

"So you weren't thinking we might end up in a relationship?"

"Of course not," he said firmly, grabbing her hand. "I don't want a relationship that's based in deceit."

"Which is why you kept finding excuses to call people and clean around my apartment," she said. He allowed a half smirk.

"Hey, you gotta admit it's never been cleaner." She found herself wanting to smile back, to laugh with him, to move closer. Clearing her throat, she abruptly tugged her hand from his, immediately missing the warmth. He was quite for a little while and then asked, "Why didn't you tell me that you couldn't remember anything about us? I'm not blaming you, but once you realized something was wrong, why didn't you say something?"

"It just felt right," she admitted quietly. "Even though I was confused, I knew, without a doubt, that I trusted you and I guess...even though nothing really made sense, at least you were there." Deeks eyes widened at her answer. It was admitting a lot, maybe more than she should and it was potentially opening up a topic she didn't not want to explore at the moment.

"You said "trusted", does that mean you don't trust me anymore?" he asked and Kensi felt her throat tighten at the question.

"With my life, at work, absolutely. Without hesitation." She glanced up at him, then lowered her gaze to her fingers again, making little whirls in the fabric of her jeans. "But outside of that, I'm not sure. I think it might take some time."

"Kensi, you have to know that I never would have taken advantage of the situation." She nodded, giving him a tiny smile.

"I know, Deeks. I believe you," she told him honestly, reaching out to squeeze his shoulder, pulling back quickly.

"I guess I should get going," he said, gesturing to the bag of food as he stood. "You should eat before the tacos get cold." Hesitating at the door, he turned back to her, his face once more clouded with concern.

"Are we going to be ok?" he asked softly and she sighed.

"I think so, with time. Night Deeks."

As he walked out the door, she almost called him back. Almost told him that she wished it had been true. Instead, she let him go and ate her tacos in silence, thinking of what might have been.

A/N: I'm sorry if this was a slight let down after all that build up, but it didn't feel right to have them follow through on anything romantic.