A/N: I loved hearing from you guys in the reviews! You sure know how to make a girl feel special... :D As a big THANK YOU, I cooked up a new chapter for you! I hope you're going to enjoy it. Although there's a good chance that some of you are going to hate me at the end of it... :D
Tell me what you thought of it anyway! Happy reading. ;)
PS. /MyPaperHeart_M
Disclaimer: I do not own The Vampire Diaries or any of its characters. This is a work of fiction written for entertainment purposes, but the original characters and original storylines present in "My Paper Heart" are my own work.
When I first heard the knock on my door, I had a pretty good idea of who might be standing behind it. Taking a step inside the hallway confirmed it for me. I froze for a moment there, unsure of what to do. Finally, I walked toward the sidetable to grab the first edition of My Paper Heart and went for the door. As I opened it, I took Katherine's sight in. She stood there patiently with no trace of her usually smug posture. Her head was slightly titled to the side, the ghost of a smile on her lips.
"I'm going to take the fact that you opened the door as a good sign," she said in a soft tone.
She stared me straight in the eye, traces of joy shining timidly back at me. I held her gaze for a few seconds- and for the very first time since I've met her, we shared a simple moment. Her attention eventually landed on the book I was holding.
"I see you got my present," she observed, a pleased grin flashing across her lips.
"I did. It's a beautiful gift." There was no point in pretending otherwise but I kept my tone detached. "How did you know I would like it?" I asked, genuinely curious. "You're going to tell me it's your favorite too?" I let a small, teasing smile appear at the corner of my mouth.
"No. I had never heard of it before, actually; but I guess I should thank you for that. It was a very… captivating read." She seemed lost in thought for a short moment before she composed herself again. A small part of me was in fact glad that she liked the book, but I didn't let it show. Instead, I cocked one of my eyebrows and stared at her in expectation.
"I saw you reading it a couple of times on your lunch break at school," she confessed, taking my hint. "And from the cracks on the cover and the dog-eared pages, I assumed you had read it many times already, so…" she trailed off while shrugging coquettishly. I wasn't sure if I should freak out over how much of a giant creeper she was, or just give up and get used to it.
"Well, it's a very thoughtful gesture…" I admitted softly. "But I can't accept it." I moved away from the door, stepping forward to hand her the book.
"Why not?" She replied immediately, an upset look on her face.
"Because it's the first edition of a nineteenth century book! No matter how much you paid for it or who you compelled to obtain it, it's too valuable a gift for me to accept." I pushed the book further toward her.
"I bought it online from a little old-fashioned bookshop in London," she drawled, offended at the suggestion she had compelled someone for it. "And they don't do refunds, so you should keep it."
"I'm sorry but I can't-"
"It's very rude to decline a gift, you know… in every single culture," she cut me off with a daring look in her eyes. She crossed her arms over her chest to notify me that she was not even considering taking the book back. I was a little stumped and my polite and civilized side couldn't help but to feel a little guilty for returning her gift. I frowned and looked down at the book, trying to find an acceptable compromise.
"You said you liked it…" I mumbled. "Maybe you should keep it then- since I already have my own copy," I added quickly.
"I can't do that." She titled her head to one side. "Because it's dedicated to you. I hope you noticed that." There were curiosity and expectation shining in her eyes.
"I did." I tried my best to hide the sudden awkwardness I felt at the mention of her note. "Look, I'm sorry but I can't accept it, OK?" I declared as firmly as possible to cover up my pleading undertone. I fidgeted the book in my hands before stepping outside of the house to go for the ledge of my window. "So I'm going to put the book down right here and you can decide what you want to do with it."
"When you say you can't accept it, are you really referring to the book?" she suddenly asked, sounding like she already knew the answer. A wave of cold washed over me at her words. I stiffened up and slowly moved backward to reach my doorstep, buying time to compose myself again. I cleared my throat and looked into her eyes.
"If what you wrote down is the truth, I think it's really great that you're willing to… connect with people," I started cautiously. "But you need to find someone else to help you with that," I whispered, holding my breath unconsciously, afraid of what her reaction would be. Suddenly realizing that I wasn't protected by the invisible wall of my threshold anymore, I continued to take tiny discreet steps backwards.
"Is it because it's me?" she asked, narrowing her eyes with intensity. What she was implying and the way she phrased it was so blunt that my eyebrows shot up in surprise of their own accord. I stared at her while debating whether or not I could risk talking to her openly.
"Well, you're not exactly the most… likeable person around…" I tried carefully, a joking smile on my lips to ease the barb.
"I'm aware of that," she snapped. "I did what I had to do to survive. Being liked, having friends or lovers wouldn't have brought me anything. Just extra luggage or a weakness that I couldn't afford to carry around." The sharpness of her tone caused my breath to catch.
"I know."
"But that's only one side of who I am," she added, a secretive glint in her eyes.
"When was the last time you let your other side show? Five hundred and something years again?" I asked a bit derisively.
"Maybe." She shrugged in defence. "Does it matter?"
"It does, actually. Even if you acted like someone different at first, or forced some of your character traits, I believe that after five centuries, who you pretend to be just becomes who you are."
"Don't think that you know me." She said the words with a smile, but her eyes were cold. "That would be a mistake," she warned.
"Oh I won't even try to pretend that I figured you out," I stated in a detached tone. "You have way too many efficient walls for that."
"Well, it's entirely up to you to bring down those walls," she sing-songed a little mischievously.
I froze, disturbed by what she was implying. She obviously hadn't picked that particular quote aimlessly. She knew that it was powerful and emotional enough to make me forgive her for assaulting me. But I never expected that she could have meant what she wrote down somehow. And yet, that was exactly what she was telling me right now. I hadn't the slightest idea if this was just another game to her or the truth. But either way, my answer wouldn't change.
"Assuming what you're saying is true, I'm not the right person to do so."
"And why is that?" she asked with a small pout on her lips.
"Because it's better to learn mathematics from someone who has become an expert in them," I replied sternly.
"Come on… you have lots of friends- and I know for a fact that you've already been in love before." She was clearly amused by her own innuendo.
"Doesn't mean I'm good at it," I shot back, starting to get irritated by her persistence. She met my eyes with an intrigued look, an incredulous smile ghosting her lips.
"Of course you are…" she finally answered. "I'm starting to think that-"
"It doesn't matter what you think! I can't do this!" I cut her off, my voice getting louder with anger. "You have to find someone else because… I'm just an empty shell, okay?!" I realized too late how defensive I sounded. I was feeling pushed into a corner and it never did me any good. For a moment, my outburst left her silent.
"You're not an empty shell, Maya…" she scolded me. "The beating I can hear proves that you have a heart," she continued with a small smile and a teasing look, obviously trying to lighten the mood.
"That heart died a long time ago." I kept my face impassive, turning around to go back inside.
"Don't say things like that!" she snapped suddenly in a heated tone, goading me to look at her again. "Yours is not dead. I have seen dead hearts before and trust me, you don't want one." A glint of hurt shone behind the anger in her eyes.
"You know what? You're right!" I snarled. "It's not dead! It just had been shattered into so many pieces that it's beyond repair…" I shouted through greeted teeth; my anger boiling too quickly toward the surface. "There's only a little tiny bit of it that's just barely still alive, and even though its aim is to love and care, its instinct to survive is way more powerful." I clenched my hands into fists, my body language oozing threats.
Her wide eyes were locked on mine. I realized from her tense expression and crossed arms that my words and hostility were punching her in the gut. I straightened a little and tried to ease my anger.
"Maybe this tiny fragment could expand… hell, maybe it could even gather and make the broken pieces stick together again somehow." I tried to fake a smile but my undertone was icy cold. "But it wouldn't possibly survive another heartbreak, so no one is allowed around it." I articulated the two words clearly as a warning. "Because you're right! I don't want a dead heart…" I finished with an ironic smirk on my lips, looking deeply into her eyes.
The image reflected in the stare she was giving me shook me out of my anger. Suddenly, I became aware that I had completely lashed out on her about something she wasn't even responsible for. She had only implied that she was willing to open her heart. How did it end up with me pouring my scalding build-up venom on her? Even if it was a lie, she didn't deserve the treatment I had just given her. I took a deep breath and sighed, closing my eyes for a brief second.
"I'm sorry…"
"It's okay," she murmured softly.
"But if you meant what you wrote," I continued tiredly, "you need to find someone else..." I turned around and went to step across the threshold.
"Maya," she called out, grabbing my wrist swiftly. A flashback of her assault on this very doorstep, a week ago, passed through my mind. I froze and shot her a deadly glare, but she had already let go of my hand. She looked up at me, burning holes into my skull with her eyes. The hesitation in them made me uncomfortable. It seemed like she was searching for an answer on my face- but finally decided to speak.
"Am I responsible for… triggering your senses breakdown?" she asked hesitantly. I was startled by her question. First, because it was a confirmation that she did know what happened to me. Second, because it apparently bothered her enough to provoke some reflection. The thought made my eyes narrow, but she actually seemed sincere.
"You are only one of the reasons... but you sure didn't help." I gave her a small smile I wasn't sure had reached my lips. She nodded in understanding.
"Well, I'll cut you some slack," she announced lightly. "I'm going to be out of town for a week or two. I might not even come back at all," she added carelessly with a little shrug of her shoulders. "But if I do," she pursued, taking slow steps towards me, "just know that I will not let you slip through my fingers." She leaned in a few inches from my face, mischief shining in her eyes. "No excuses," she sing-songed, straightening herself up and starting to walk backwards.
There was too much promise in her eyes for my liking, before she disappeared.
KATHERINE'S POV
I needed to do one more thing before leaving town. The house I was standing in front of was quiet and bathed in darkness, except for the bedroom window. Perfect.
I went boldly for the front door and tried the handle. Unlocked. How convenient. It seemed like she would never learn. I snuck upstairs and opened the bedroom door silently. Settling back comfortably against the wall, I waited for her to get out of the bathroom. The anticipation made me all giddy. I always enjoyed trapping her in the most awkward and uncomfortable moments.
After a while, she finally came out of the bathroom in her PJs and dropped off some jewelery on the top of her dresser. She hadn't acknowledged my presence yet and a wicked smirk rose on my lips, knowing it wouldn't take much longer now before she did. She slowly turned around to go toward her bed and suddenly froze, taking a sharp, panicked breath. She stumbled back a little; her eyes filled with fear. It made my smirk grow even wider.
"Katherine," she whispered in disbelief.
"Hello Elena," I purred, burning holes into her skull with what I knew was a predatory look. She looked around frantically and made a quick movement toward her phone on the dresser. I darted right in front of her, invading her personal space.
"Ah-ah! I wouldn't do that if I were you," I sing-songed lightly. "That is, if you want to stay in one piece," I added with an innocent smile, knowing perfectly that she wouldn't miss the implied threat. She took a few urgent steps backwards, the crazy rate of the pitter-patters of her heart sounding like music to my ears. But l knew it was matter of seconds before she would compose herself again and brace herself to face me.
"What do you want?" she spat, trying to be as defiant as she could. Here we go… It was actually the only thing I liked about this piteous and boring copy of me. Despite her terror, she was always trying to put on a bold front. The girl had guts, I'd gave her that. That was precisely the reason why it was so fun to mess with her.
"If you're here to go through my freezer again, it's in the kitchen," she added dryly, a bitter smirk on her lips. I actually laughed at her comment.
"So she figured out how I picked her favorite ice cream, huh?" I asked in amusement. "Not really surprised though… she is a smart girl," I declared with a cocky smirk. From the deep frown between her eyebrows, I could easily tell she didn't like the way I was talking about Maya. And it made me gloat inwardly. She was making this too easy… I took a few slow steps toward her and composed a serious face.
"In fact, I'm here to try to play fair…" I let a little hesitation shine into my eyes, just enough for her to believe that it wasn't another one of my mind games. The small, baffled expression that appeared on her face for a second confirmed me that my little act was working.
"I'm going to be out of town for a week or two," I informed her carelessly. Elena didn't need to know that but I wasn't actually sure if I was going to come back. I was oddly drawn to Maya, making me want to run away as much as to dive in even further, but I knew myself well enough to recognize that I was an out of sight, out of mind kind of woman.
"So if you…" I continued, shrugging my shoulders, "you know, want to take this opportunity to tell Maya how you feel about her, it would be the perfect moment." I dropped the bomb on her with as much emotions as I could muster. "Because when I come back, I very much intend to make her mine and I will be merciless…" I made sure she didn't miss my greedy look and the fierce smirk plastered on my lips.
She was clearly debating with what kind of emotions she should feel. Shock, confusion, or anger out of protecting Maya? I waited patiently for her to respond with my poker face on- despite the fact that I was very amused inside.
"What are you talking about?" she finally mumbled, her eyebrows knitted together. So, confusion it was…
"If you want to lie to me, or even to yourself, it's totally fine by me," I declared, pacing a little playfully in front of her. "But don't blame me for winning the girl you love later on."
"Wh-at?" she stuttered, her breath hitching. "I'm not in love with Maya, she's my best friend!" she exclaimed, offended. Her words gave me a feeling of déjà vu.
"And let me guess… you don't want to sleep with your friends." I tried my best to hide the amused smirk ghosting on my lips.
"Of course not!" she shouted, obviously insulted.
"Yep, definitely déjà vu…" I murmured more for myself.
"Regardless what you apparently think you know; it doesn't even matter!" she fired back, her voice getting louder. "Maya and I aren't lesbians, and despite the fact that you obviously don't care about that sort of thing, you could at least respect other peoples' way of life!" I stopped and looked her straight in the eye before walking very close.
"Oh sweet, innocent Elena…" I sing-songed, condescending. "You would be surprised of how... open-minded people can be. But you already know, actually, don't you?" I added, looking deeply into her eyes with a knowing grin on my lips. She immediately took a step back, crossing her arms securely around her chest.
"You're insane," she drawled lowly, disbelief glowing in her eyes. I stopped a giggle from passing my lips just in time, and did my best to put on a sincere face.
"Like I said… I'm just trying to play fair here," I said earnestly while straightening myself. "But if you don't have those kinds of feelings for Maya, fine! I will have her all for myself," I concluded with a delighted grin plastered on my face. I gave her one last provocative look before speeding out of her house, leaving her with an evident lost expression on her features.
I made my way to my car unhurriedly, excessively pleased with myself. This whole little act would only serve me if I eventually did come back to town but the game had been very satisfying by itself. Now I just had to hope that Elena would do exactly what I expected her to do, and what she was the very best at: breaking some hearts with her perpetual indecisiveness.