MAGIC IN MECHANICSBURG

CHAPTER 3:

CAFFEINATED CHAOS

Gilgamesh and Agatha had spent much of that day tinkering with the ionization engines, with Tarvek occasionally offering pointers, Hermione offering calculations, and Anevka offering snark. The Sturmvoraus siblings were kept in a hotel under guard during the night. A snazzy hotel, but a gilded cage all the same. The others also stayed in the hotel, those who weren't standing guard over Klaus. Gilgamesh was also standing vigil.

Early the next morning, Agatha, accompanied by Judy, Harry, and Von Pinn, had gone to find Carson von Mekkhan. Gilgamesh and Tarvek, along with Hermione and Krosp, were working more on the ionization engines, Zeetha keeping an eye on her brother. Anevka had decided to go shopping, and the other wizards were mostly helping out Gilgamesh for now, using the Fidelius charm. Moloch, whom they'd almost forgotten about, was just sightseeing for now.

They soon found Carson, thanks to Judy, an older man wearing a cap over his bald head, a beard (but no moustache) lining his chin and cheeks. "Well, well, well," the old man remarked. "Judy…a surprise to find you back. Or at least it would've been, had it not been for the rumours we've been hearing already about Sturmhalten and the Baron." His gaze fell upon Agatha. "And a Heterodyne girl. I don't remember either of the masters having a daughter."

"It's a very long story, Carson, and it's best we do this away from public ears," Judy said. "She's Bill's daughter…with Lucrezia. Where they are, I don't know. We last saw Barry eleven years ago."

After a moment, Carson swept off his hat, revealing a heavily scarred head, and said, as he bowed to Agatha, "I am Carson von Mekkhan, the former seneschal, and the Keeper of Keys to Castle Heterodyne. Welcome home, my lady…assuming you are her."

"Do you doubt my word, Carson?" Judy asked.

"No, but…after so many impostors and false hopes, can you blame me for being cautious?" His eyes glanced at Harry. "And what of this young man?"

"He's my friend, Harry Potter," Agatha said. "By many standards, he would be considered a wizard."

Carson seemed to shoot him a look of recognition and surprise at the name, something Harry thought suspicious. "A pleasure to meet you, Mr Potter. I am already acquainted with Von Pinn. And you are…?"

The cat Construct was the one being addressed. "Krosp, Emperor of Cats."

Carson nodded. "Well then, let's take this somewhere a bit more private…"

Said place was a coffee shop called, oddly enough, The Sausage Factory. They were led by Carson to a table where a young man, presumably his relation, sat with a cup in his hand with an indolent air to his posture. He was introduced as the current seneschal, Vanamonde von Mekkhan, Carson's grandson. Judy eventually explained the situation in brief, though she gently, and pointedly, forbade Agatha from having any coffee. However, Harry noticed, while Judy was distracted in telling her tale, that Agatha drank some in a rebellious fit of pique, though she grimaced at the taste.

After Judy relayed her tale, Carson steepled his fingers. "I see. So that's how it is. And with the Baron here, and knowing she is here, that makes her going in and proving her birthright to the Castle difficult. In a perverse way, we could hope for an impostor coming soon. I've certainly heard some interesting rumours through my sources. And then, there's the problem of Lucrezia's mind. If she truly is The Other, then allowing her access to the Castle is dangerous. Not to mention the fragmented state of the Castle's mind…though I have heard that the Castle repairs are actually occurring at a more rapid pace."

"Really?" Judy asked. "How?"

"Not so long ago, a group of strange people arrived in Mechanicsburg. They were searching for someone." Carson looked at Harry. "Someone by the name of Harry Potter."

Harry blinked. "…What?" And then he remembered. There was another group of wizards searching for him. Neville, Luna, Bill Weasley and Fleur. "Would they have been a stocky guy, a couple of blondes, one rather dotty, the other ridiculously beautiful, and a red-haired guy?"

"Spot on," Carson said. "The older blonde with the French accent turned a lot of heads, even if she was a bit rude. She was a bit like a Geisterdamen, only less unearthly. The younger blonde…she seemed almost like a Spark herself, only quieter. It seemed suspicious that the rate of repairs went up shortly after they went into the Castle. We tried warning them, but they seemed to think you were in the Castle, by dint of it being the most hazardous place in the area."

Harry could understand that logic. Even so, that meant his friends were in the Castle, at the dubious mercy of what Judy had already told him was a massive, malevolent artificial intelligence with a macabre sense of humour. Then again, it was probably keeping them alive to help with the repairs. Which begged the question, where was Fawkes? Surely Fawkes would have gotten them out of there.

Harry's musings were interrupted when he heard a strange noise, not unlike a dentist's drill. It came from Agatha, or rather, the cup of coffee she had surreptitiously drained while Judy was distracted, as it vibrated against the saucer. Judy noticed this, and her mismatched eyes widened. "Oh, shit," she murmured. And Harry realised that this was the first time he heard the Construct actually swear. "How strong is this coffee?"

"It's my own personal blend," Vanamonde said, his pride tempered with nervousness. "Of course, I emphasized the rejuvenating and brain-invigorating properties, but…"

"Let's put it this way," Carson said, with a resigned voice, as if he knew what was coming. "After it's been left to sit for twenty-four hours, we use it to strip paint."

"Agatha?" Harry asked, and then her green eyes were on him with laser-like intensity.

"ThisstuffiskindofinterestingbutforthelifeofmeIcan'tseewhattheattractionis," Agatha said at high speed, just barely understandable.

Vanamonde cleared his throat. "Well, my usual coffee machine is broken, so we're using another one…" He blinked, as did Harry, when he realised that Agatha had vanished from her seat. And considering that Judy was between Agatha and getting out of the seat, caffeine must have given Agatha the ability to Apparate over short distances, or else move at relativistic speeds. And she was currently standing on the counter, merrily tearing the coffee machine apart at such high speeds, her arms were a blur.

Judy put her face in her hands. "This is why I don't give her anything stronger than weak tea. Sparks and caffeine are a bad combination. Bill and Barry were exactly like this. Hopefully, there won't be any explosions."

Von Pinn, who had been standing by silently, actually snickered. "Her speed is actually a little impressive," she remarked. "She's almost as fast as I am when I'm going all out."

As Agatha fell deeper and deeper into her caffeine-fuelled Spark fugue, she suddenly gave an order to one of the waitresses, having read up on the coffee-making process from a book sold at the counter, as well as smelling the beans. When the waitress obeyed, albeit after some recalcitrance, Vanamonde stared. "Did…did she just order Rinja and not get slapped?"

"Of course she did, boy!" Carson snapped. "Listen to her voice! She's definitely a Spark! And almost certainly a Heterodyne! All that's needed is the Castle's own test."

Suddenly, Agatha appeared near Vanamonde. "Here'syourbookbackIcantellyouwroteitunderanomdeplumeImadespellingcorrectionsinredandIwouldlikethesepartsplease."

Vanamonde stared at the now-annotated book and the slip of paper, and then said, "Your wish is my command, my lady…" But as Agatha vanished in a burst of speed, he blinked. "What did I just say?"

"You're acting like her Igor, only without the hunchback or lisp," Harry snarked.

"Harry, there's a reason for that," Judy explained patiently. "Most of the population of Mechanicsburg are born and bred minions, obeying a Spark in the Madness Place is second nature."

They looked on as a mechanic by the name of Herr Mitrant decided to leave in a huff, only to get roped in by Agatha admiring his tools and claiming she could get the boilers to boil water in eight seconds with his help. Harry stared in sheer shock and even horror. "So, your people are basically automatic minions to mad scientists? Wow, that's…it's like you're a whole bunch of Dobbys. Hermione has got to be let into this gently…"

"So it's like natural selection?" Hermione asked, looking out across the streets of Mechanicsburg. They were taking a break from their work for now. "Successive generations are more likely to be minions? That's…disturbing."

"I suppose," Gilgamesh said, looking out across the streets along with her. "Keep in mind, the Heterodyne Boys would have treated them far better than most, but I suppose the Heterodynes in general used more than fear to inspire loyalty. And Agatha…well, my father must have seen something in her. Even with The Other in her head, he must have seen something to give her a chance. Maybe something of her father and uncle. One thing you must understand, Hermione, is how much my father hates The Other. Even before I learned she was Lucrezia Mongfish, well, he said The Other had destroyed our castle and the town below, not to mention the havoc they wrought upon the rest of Europe. So for him to give Agatha a chance, despite The Other being in her mind…"

"Agatha's a good person," Hermione stated. "Spark aside, I think she wants to be like her father and uncle. What about you?"

Gilgamesh pursed his lips in thought. "…My father has been preparing me for running the empire from an early age, though admittedly, some of it had to be done discreetly. I didn't even know he was my father until a certain point, as he kept me with the other students in Castle Wulfenbach until…well, Tarvek persuaded me to look for my lineage in a safe my father had. Long story short, while I didn't find out the truth from the safe, my father finally admitted that I was his son. Tarvek was expelled and sent back home on charges of espionage. Admittedly, all the young Sparks were there to spy, but they weren't meant to get caught. And, well…I did mess up with Tarvek a few times during our time in Paris. Anyway, my point is, father always emphasized that I needed to maintain order and peace. And unfortunately, with Sparks, sometimes the only language they understand is force. I don't like it, but father had always emphasized keeping the people safe."

"For the Greater Good?" Hermione asked acidly.

"Well, it's utilitarianism, the Greatest Good for the Greatest Number," Gilgamesh said. "He views being a dictator as a chore, a duty, not something he wants. But it's not something he can quit, either. Because if he does, what happens?"

Hermione sighed quietly. "You know…the old me would have been opposed to you and your father, no matter what. She would have had this notion that all dictators were irredeemably evil, and must be stopped. She would have charged in, and to hell with the consequences. But that old me died, when I saw the so-called Leader of the Light decide that Harry needed to die to remain a martyr. She was already dying when she woke up and heard Harry fell through the Veil, dying by degrees when her friends and family died. I've been called the Smartest Witch of my generation…but it took me too long to actually think. I won't like working with your father…but I want to speak to him more before I really make a judgement."

"Hermione, there are times when I don't like him either. Most of the time, he's rather cold and distant…but he's a good man beneath it all," Gilgamesh said. "Those who hate his rule the most are the Sparks he had conquered. Many of the common folk, though…some love him, as they don't have to fear what other Sparks do to them, either by experimenting on them, or their monsters or weapons getting out of control. He has one rule, really."

"And what is that?"

"Don't make me come over there," Gilgamesh said with a shrug, and Hermione, despite herself, giggled.

"Really?"

"More or less." Gilgamesh sighed quietly. "The last little while has been hectic. I've met the last of the Heterodynes in the company of a wizard from a parallel universe, I've learned the identity of The Other, and I've not only met my twin sister, but also know who my mother is. It's quite a lot to take in. I'm just focusing on keeping Mechanicsburg safe, and with it, my father and Agatha. I think my father has come to see her as the last remaining thing he has of the Heterodyne Boys. And while he's worried about The Other being in her head…I think he's willing to give her a chance. He wants her to be like Bill and Barry. Though of course, like any Spark, she probably needs someone to supervise her. Harry probably will do just that…"

Harry stared as Agatha built what was basically a super coffee machine, glad he had actually cast a Notice Me Not on the coffee shop, given the commotion (Carson approved: he was worried that Vole might cause trouble). Carson had been explaining the history of the minions of Mechanicsburg, which seemed pretty dark to Harry, though he could understand Carson's concern. If Agatha proved to be false, they'd tear her to bloody shreds.

"Would they accept me?" Harry asked as Agatha, beginning to come down off her caffeinated high, made the finishing touches to the coffee machine.

"A wizard messiah from another world?" Carson asked. "Previous Heterodynes have had harems, Constructs and Clanks for lovers, and those aren't the strangest of proclivities…you'd barely rate a yawn. As long as you are her protector and her lover, I'm sure they'd love you."

Agatha soon was finished, and began filling a cup of coffee, one whose rich scent touched even Harry, and he was more of a fan of tea. Vanamonde volunteered to drink it, and when he took a sip…he froze, transfixed. Tears began to stream down from his eyes. Agatha asked, worry tinging her tone, whether he was all right, and he began going on an explanation that began to become a tirade about how absolutely perfect the coffee was.

It was when he got onto the cup and saucer being perfect that Judy sighed, and gently took hold of the young man. "Calm down, young seneschal. You've just had your first real brush with what a Heterodyne can do." She then shot a look at Agatha. "And as for you…no coffee, especially strong coffee, unless it's an emergency."

"I…don't know what came over me," Agatha said, rubbing the back of her head sheepishly. "That made my usual stuff look tame."

Von Pinn was snickering, despite her usual antipathy. "Sparks and caffeine…it's like pouring petroleum onto a fire," she chuckled.

Carson cleared his throat, amused. "I think you have almost entirely proven your credentials, Agatha. Still, I believe there is someone…well, something who should know. I need to take you to speak with the Castle…"

CHAPTER 3 ANNOTATIONS:

So, Agatha's done her coffee machine rebuild, and there're hints of Gilgamesh/Hermione beginning. And now, Harry and Agatha have learned the fates of the other wizards…

No numbered annotations this time.