A/N: You know... I really expected to get this chapter out quicker. Alas, farm work. Buut I think it's worth the wait? Call this the climax of this arc if you will ;)
One-Eye: Fear not, Fret has plot armour!
AlexFalTalon: No need to Fret over ferrets ya know, they always land on their... heads hehehe. And yes he does have some degree of Plot Armour (but I need him alive... for now... muahahahaha!), but it's likely of the big and heavy kind he'd complain about if he knew it existed. More attempts at comedy coming your way!
Sebias: Yes, Snakeskin would. He might not get the chance but it's the thought that counts. The toads are just your standard incompetent baddies ya know. Still threatening, still evil, but you just have to laugh at their antics. Asmodeus, Baliss and Mr Death for those not in the know, are snakes from the Redwall books. I don't know where they're all from- Asmodeus is from Redwall and that's all I am certain of- but Momchillo and Fret likely heard it at abbey school. The toads on the other paw... didn't go to school XD
Abrahem: Any and all rumours are perfect for the corsair arc. Really I'm not sure what to do with *any* of them yet- beyond perhaps Blendfur. I think we need a few more characters in the Northlands? Might swell up that plotline a bit buuut... would you guys really complain? We're still in the drawing boards here as to what they'll *do*- but the reason rumours are perfect is because they help flesh out the Manywhispers.
Yes- it's personally a massive pet peeve of mine when something remains unfinished. Like, you know someone wanted to say something but you don't know what! The horror! The mental agony! The new and exciting way to develop Fret.
Ah, kidnapped by Marik... we shall see where they are... hehehehe... good guesses though. You know I love reading them.
Which is why I'm a little bugged FFN didn't send over your review earlier! I got the notification for the Stannis review about... a week or two ago? I assume when you posted it. And then I moderated it. And theeeeen... Well it's here now at least, right?
So another interesting guess- Fret as Stannis XD. I can see him being cold and humorless (but I can see him going a lot of ways tbh) although... Shireen... wouldn't happen.
Ah, I looked up the quote and I can see... the similarities. I wouldn't call it direct inspiration (honestly thought I was being original :() although there *is* such a thing as subconcious imitation- you know, you get a good idea and think so badly that it's yours but then when you try and think back to where you got it from you realize that it's dangerously similar to something else. A coincidence, if you will. (They happen often around me...) *Is tempted to change it* I mean I probably won't but this whole copying thing gets a little worrying sometimes...
Yup, being the bait is family tradition. Snakeskin's been eaten a fair few times himself, don'tcha know? I don't think Snakeskin should be judged toooo harshly for this- especially when you look at other vermin parents. Sure he's no Sickletail- but he's a far-cry from Longclaw too. Hehehe Wonders whether or not to be vague You know what, I'll just say it. She is going to come back as Marik's (supposed :P) daughter. No point in resurrecting her if she didn't have a part to play, you know.
In regards to the audiobook, Jack the Quick (here known as Socca Kingkiller) has offered to do the voice of Momchillo. No idea what he sounds like but I don't have much of an idea for Momchillo to be honest XD
One last thing, well, two things. Did I ever specify how Clogg lost his eye? Did I ever leave any implications? And Momchillo's tail is... pink, right? You offered to help look through stuff sooo er- do you mind if I employ you now?
Remnants: Hehehe, he suffers quite a bit, doesn't he? Weell that should probably maybe come to a halt soon...
Keldor: I love the puns. I love puns. XD
Berserker88: I just love it when you go on your (killing) er- review sprees. Your reviews nicely summarized the whole arc basically. Momchillo's development is continuing to go smoothly- more is on it's way! I love writing Butch- has a fun accent (and an overgrown dibbun is just too good an opportunity to pass up)
I missed writing the pirates. We should get more of them when Fret and Momchillo are finished with their adventure. Yeah... *scenewasn'tmeanttobesaucymumblemumble*Which should be three chapters from now *at most*
Wrath is about to be unleashed... Although I was a little tempted to let Fret stew in acids for a bit and move on to other arcs hehehe
Fret expected to land on anything from sharp teeth to stomach acids, luckily he hit a wooden platform instead. Headfirst. Stars danced before his eyes. What was happening? What was going on? Had he drifted off? Was he dreaming? Perhaps he'd fallen asleep on Butch's shoulders?
The pain told him otherwise, it felt like his skull had nearly split in two. The ferret could not see anything, it was rather hard to see when it looked like the heavens themeselves had decided to fall on him. But his nose still worked, and an earthy acid, eerily familiar, became known to him. It was not the same kind of slime as slobber (and he knew far too much about slobber from prior experiences), it was Slimegut!
"Gotcha warlord! Ha! Thought you could escape me, did you?" Webbed fingers grabbed him by the scruff and lifted him into the air. "Think again, stinkball!" The fat toad kicked the platform repeatedly. "Get going boys! Before those bats turn up!"
Fret's vision adjusted, and he found himself face to face with the leering toad.
"Ohohoho! The things I'm going to do to you boy! You almost ruined me! Ha!" Slimegut pulled him closer, so that there was no space between them, their noses squished against one another. "Wanna know what getting eaten actually feels like? What about flying? Ever wanted to fly? A shave? All that fur must be itchy! Maybe you'd like to swim too, but I have to warn you, I get very competitive in the water. Shall we start with lunch?"
The ferret doubted the toad would actually eat him, at least, not until he'd been proven valueless. At the same time, he wouldn't put it past the great brute and had no desire whatsoever to see anybeast's insides!
As a child his claws had been a subject of much contention. Bella wanted them blunted, Montague the Recorder wanted them clipped, but Constance had had her way and his claws had stayed sharp (or rather, as sharp as ferret claws were). It was yet another thing he was grateful to her for.
Slimegut appreciated it less, but it was rather hard to appreciate getting clawed in the face.
"Aaaaaaaah! It's blinded me! It's blinded me!" Fret had gone for the eyes with his first slash. A kind of frenzied panic pumped through the ferret, who's claws seemed to be everywhere at once now. His legs were kicking, his jaws snapping, and his paws scratching. It looked rather ridiculous, and such uncontrolled scrambling was more befitting a dibbun about to be bathed. But Slimegut did not have much experience dealing with those...
"Swamphide! Swampbreath! Get over he-aaaaaaaowowowowow! Not the finger, not the finger!"
Fret had made his choice back when he'd jumped down the hole. He was not going to let this toad win. Not now when he'd just been so happy!
"B-but Chief! Who's gonna move the arms then?"
"Forget the arms and pull this vermin off! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah!"
Fret felt a pair of strong arms rip him free of Slimegut. The fat toad fell on his rump, continuing to holler and scream about the numerous scratches all over his face.
"Hold still!" Cried the toad that was Swamp-something. Fret was not sure which one it was and frankly didn't care. He twisted his head around and made to bite the toad's neck. The amphibian was faster and stepped backwards. The amphibian was also an idiot and stepped off the platform.
"Aaaaaaaaaaah-oof!"They hit a platform below the first and Fret was glad such a flabby toad had cushioned his fall. The pressure round his chest now weakened, the ferret shot to his feetpaws. His heart was beating fast, far faster than he was used to.
A pair of dumbstruck toads were staring at him in shock. After all, nobeast was supposed to drop in from a platform above. They turned swiftly to anger and both pounced simultaneously, with battlecries that filled Fret's heart with fear. Instinctively, the young ferret curled in on himself with a whimper.
For once fortune seemed to be on his side, however, and the two, as if oblivious to one another, collided mid-air.
Fret had no time to even breathe a sigh of relief, for Slimegut had hopped down from the upper parts of the 'bear', livid with rage. A webbed fist slammed into his muzzle. He was quite sure he'd lost a tooth...
"I'll kill you." The toad growled, his hands tightening around the ferret's neck. "I'll kill you for thi-aaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"
Fret's claws dug into the appendages holding him. He was not much of a fighter, and never had been. Matiya could have, and had, knocked him to the ground in half a heartbeat. A beast like Bork needed far less time (and far less effort...) But he had claws, the toad did not. He had teeth, the toad did not. And his fangs were sharp. He kicked Slimegut's slimy gut as much as he could, the claws on his feetpaws raking cut after cut into his opponent's unprotected flab. They weren't particularly deep or anything, but it was all he could do.
And for once, it was enough.
The chief toad, still screaming, teetered off this second platform, and burst through the bear skin- still clinging to Fret's neck. Slimegut hit the ice with a thud and a groan. Fret pulled himself free of the webbed fingers, glad that the fat creature had not landed on top of him. He was rather less glad when the bear did.
Momchillo could hardly believe his eyes. One moment the bear had eaten Fret, then it's arms had gone limp, it's belly had wobbled; as if somebeast had landed within; and apparently it had suffered a bout of indigestion so bad it had come crashing onto the ice! The mouse knew from experience that Fret stunk worse than Hellgates, but to take down a bear with flavor alone...
Confusion and surprise turned to delight when the ferret's black and white form scrambled back up the humongous beast's jaws. "Fret!"
Fret padded past the sharp teeth as fast as his paws would carry him. He scrambled along the ice, slipping and tripping in his panic.
"Oh no you don't!" A long, sticky tongue caught him by the leg and brought him to the ground. The ferret's claws stabbed into the frozen water in an attempt to pull away, but all he succeeded in doing was drawing long gashes along the frozen water. Slowly, but surely he was being dragged back in.
"Oh no ye don'!" Fret had, in his panic, forgotten about Snakeskin, Momchillo and Butch, yet he doubted he'd ever been happier to see anybeast. They came running to him now, the latter far behind, huffing and puffing.
Momchillo was the first to seize him, the stoat following right after. Each held him by a wrist and pulled with all their might.
"We've got you Fret!" The mouse grunted, his teeth gritted in determination.
"Don't let him get away! Pull you idiots! Pull!" Shouted Slimegut.
Several more toads must have joined the tug of war, for now both Snakeskin and Momchillo were swiftly loosing ground.
"L-let go!" Fret stammered. He was panicking again. "G-get the bats. G-get out of-"
"I've los' two kits too many!" Snakeskin snapped. "I ain' loosin' any more no thank ye!"
"B-but they'l hurt y-"
"Oh shut up, will you?" Momchillo growled. "Now is not the time to start being noble! We're not letting go! And we're not leaving you! And we are not-"
"PULL!" Came a deep croak from within the bear.
Snakeskin's grip failed and the stoat landed on his rump. Momchillo lost balance, but refused to let go. Both mouse and ferret were pulled swiftly along the ice. Fret whimpered. They were doomed... and Momchillo, stupid as always, refused to save himself! Butch was the one that did the saving. Having finally caught up to the others, the beaver babe grabbed hold of the mouse's tail.
Dibbun or not, the beaver was big and heavy. What his feetpaw lacked in claws, they made up for in size and traction. What he lacked in strength, he made up for in flab. It was not enough to win the pulling match of course, but it did give Snakeskin time to free his spear. It also gave the stoat enough time to realize that the tongue they were wrestling with, was far too thin to belong to a bear.
"Toads..." He snarled to himself. Then, louder, he spoke again. "Ye 'ave got te the coun' of three afore I cut this tongue in'o stew! One! Two! Three!"
The tug of war ended abruptly. The de-fact rope shot back into the bear. Butch fell flat on his back and Fret and Momchillo toppled over him. The stoat grinned and leaned casually on his spear.
"Alright, everybody out! Out!" Slimegut was the first to leave the bear-costume, followed swiftly by his dozen or so lackeys. "I don't know who you are, or who you think you are but that ferret is mine!" He snapped, stomping closer to the snake hunter.
Snakeskin was unimpressed. "I don' know 'oo ye are, or 'oo ye think ye are, bu' I don' care. That ferre' over there is me gues'. In other words 'e's mine, now be a good frog an' 'op along now, why don' ye?"
"I am a toad!" The toad shrieked, sending spittle everywhere.
"I am a toadie!" The stoat repeated, his voice high-pitched and giggly.
"That doesn't sound anything like me!"
"That doesn' soun' anythin' like me!"
Slimegut swung for the stoat, but snakes were faster and Snakeskin was faster still. He sidestepped the blow with ease, before casually bringing the flat of his spear-blade into the side of his opponent's head.
"Alrigh', I'll do the talkin' ye can do the repeatin'." The white-furred stoat turned to the remaining toads. "'Ere's the deal. Ye all scramble away now, afore the 'ole flock-a-bats show up. Ye loose yer prisoners, yer digni'ee an' yer bear suit 'coz I wan' it. Bu' ye keep yer worthless lives."
Slimegut pushed himself back up, yet drew swiftly out of the stoat's striking distance. "You're one to make threats! No-one here even knows who you are! There are thirty of us-"
"Actually Chief we only have about two doz-"
"Apparently there are fifty of us!" Slimegut shrugged. "Either way there are only three of you, so no matter how many of us there are, we outnumber you!"
"I 'ave a spear." Snakeskin pointed out.
"We all have spears! Flyspit! Get us our spears!" A small toad slunk back into the bear to do the chieftain's bidding. He emerged a moment later, with a dozen or so polearms and several sets of knives, daggers and swords. All of a sudden Snakeskin looked a little less confident. "So. We have more toads and more spears. We win, you loose."
"Aye, ye win agains' the four of us." The stoat admitted with a careless shrug (filled with nervous tension). "But Snap'll be 'ere any minute now. An' 'e's no' gonna give ye any chances te turn away. So ye ough' te surrender now. Oh, an' that cloak is Fre'ie's. I made it fur 'im, so I wan' it back." He pointed at the round metal bob wrapped around Slimegut's neck. "An' 'e wants 'is yo-yo back too, so 'and over that necklace-thing."
Slimegut's eyes darted from Fret, who was standing now- threatening at any moment to have a panic attack, to Snakeskin. He caught sight of the stoat's hypnotized eye and everything seemed to make sense. "You're Mad-Eye Marik!"
Fret facepawed, Butch gasped dramatically, Momchillo said 'um' and Snakeskin scowled.
"I ain' a thin' like tha' kitnapper."
The fat toad pointed at the ferret. "But he said his father gave him the cloak! So you're clearly his father, which would make you the world-famous warlord Mad-Eye Marik."
Butch giggled. "You actually fell for itch! Hihihihihi!"
Momchillo tried to keep a straight face, but it was hard to when Slimegut looked so.. betrayed! He snickered, then he coughed and soon the mouse was bent double with laughter.
He wasn't the only beast either, Snakeskin had to lean on his spear for support, elsewise he'd have slipped to the floor.
"Y-y-you lied to me!"
"I knew he was lying!" Longtongue butted in.
"S-so you're valueless?"
"No!" Fret snapped. Well, he was to them- but he wasn't valueless!
"Should've eaten him while we had the chance." Swamphide growled.
"You shouldn't have." Momchillo shook his head, still laughing. "Fur everywhere, indigestion, have you smelled the guy?" Lightly he punched Fret on the shoulder. "This beast is entirely inedible."
"He'd have tasted good with honey!"
Momchillo continued to snicker. "N-no he wouldn't have."
Butch tapped the mouse on the shoulder and bent down to whisper into his ear. "He kinda did."
"I heard that." Fret muttered, disgruntled to say the least by the current conversation.
Snakeskin heard it too. "So that's why the snake liked ye! I'm curious Butcher, what did 'e taste like?"
"Is this really important!?" The ferret rubbed his chest fur in frustrated awkwardness. It was an entirely new sensation. And not one he liked much...
The young beaver wriggled his paw up and down to mean 'so-so'. "Nice and sweetch butch wid un-pleasant undewtones. Also, fur."
"Butch!"
The beaver grinned sheepishly at Fret's look of annoyance. "Sawwy."
"Shut up!" Slimegut shouted before anybeast could continue. "This changes nothing- we are going to tan your hides, and now that we know you're all useless- we will kill every last one of you!"
There was a long, drawn-out silence, wherein all the good humour of the party of four vanished instantly.
The fat toad grew impatient. "Well? What are you waiting for!? Get the hairbeasts!"
"Instead of thinking of a plan," Fret growled, as the toads slowly encircled them. "You thought it was a good idea to talk about what I taste like..."
"We were stallin' fer time!" Snakeskin and Momchillo growled in unison.
"We were?" Butch asked. The beaver babe noticed Snakeskin's twitching head and gave his affirmation. "We were!"
"Brilliant idea." Fret muttered through gritted teeth. His ears flattened themselves against the top of his head. "And what do we do now?"
"Get be'in' me. An' when I say 'charge' run like the win'." Snakeskin lowered the spear, his good eye darting from one opponent to another, searching for weaknesses.
"Hey!" Momchillo suddenly shouted, pointing behind Chief Slimegut. "Look it's a snake!"
"I'm not falling for that, rat." The fat toad shook his head, his chins wobbling like a sack of pudding. "You think I'm stupid, don't you? Well I'm not! I'm smart! I am very, very smart!"
Even some of the toads were looking at him with skepticism, to say nothing of the mismatched quartet.
"It's true! I am very smart! So smart that I-"
Butch raised a large paw, deliberately widened his eyes and pointed behind the amphibian. "Itches a giant, free-legged dwagon fly!"
Slimegut growled, and hopped on the spot in rage. "Stop underestimating my-"
"Chaaaaaaaarge!" Snakeskin barreled into the Chief mid-air. Slimegut fell on his rump with a soft thud and a groan. Fret, Momchillo and Butch followed swiftly, and raced past the stunned toads before they could react.
"In'o the bear! In'o the bear!" The white furred stoat cried, lifting the muzzle. Fret, who was in the lead, hesitated. That didn't stop him from going inside of course- Butch pushed him in whether he liked it or not and Momchillo followed suite.
A dozen, slimy, pink tongues shot towards them like a volley of slobbery arrows. Unfortunately for the toads, all they latched onto were the closed jaws of their bear skull.
"Alrigh' kids... we'll si' tight till Snap comes an'-" A spear burst through the fur next to Snakeskin's head. The toads followed it up with a second that narrowly missed Momchillo's tail. "Outta the bear! Outta the bear!"
Longtongue was unfortunate enough to have opened the jaw-gate when Snakeskin said this. He was smacked aside first by Snakeskin's spear, and then (more powerfully) by Butch's tail.
The toads were armed of course, but they were used to 'fighting' a single scared beast. Beating somebeast with a club was much easier when said beast did not fight back. It also had to be mentioned, that the toads were not particularly used to armed combat.
A pair charged half-heartedly, but stopped abruptly when Snakeskin waved a spear in their path. The stoat promptly swept them off their feet with another wave of his weapon. This was little encouragement for the other amphibians.
Swamphide fly-kicking Snakeskin (in a display of acrobatics never seen before or since) was more of a morale boost, though now the toads charged without cumbersome things like polearms. A dozen swarmed upon Butch and beat the beaver babe with their fists. Snakeskin, too, was swiftly surrounded and beaten. Fret watched in horror as Swamphide attempted to strangle the flailing Momchillo. It was a relief that none of them had been stabbed yet, but Butch was crying and Snakeskin was unable to do much now and if Momchillo ended up frog-food...
He was torn away from his thoughts when Slimegut's slimy fingers closed over his shoulder, and spun him around to meet the toad's fist. "Guess where you're going 'warlord'!" The toad didn't actually give Fret a chance to guess, he stomped on the ferret's chest with enough force to wind him. "I will do every horrible thing I can think of to you." He leered, lifting the ferret back up to face him.
It was a mistake he should never have made. Instinct was driving him now, and his instincts told him to bite. At this proximity their was no stopping Fret from chomping down on Slimegut's face. The ferret clung on determinedly and the fat toad hollered.
"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah! Getitoff! Getitoff!" A pair of toads grabbed the ferret by the tail and made to yank him away, but all Fret did was sink his teeth deeper into the chieftain's slimy flab. Fret's paws found and clung to the yoyo Slimegut had so unwisely decided to keep around his neck. It was his toy! His Nuncle had given it to him and the last of Connington's gifts would not end up decorating a fat fool!
It was not the physical clinging on that was difficult, his teeth did all the work for him. He could taste the toad's blood in his mouth, and threatened to gag at any moment. His tail, not often used as a rope, was also under strain. The ferret's heart was beating swiftly and demanded more and more air. But it was hard to breathe with his nose all squished up against flab. The smell also made his job more unpleasant. Slimegut's very flesh seemed to reek something rotten and Fret had already been taken out by his breath once before...
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Slimegut screamed louder than ever. Flyspit and Swampbreath had succeeded in tearing the ferret off of their Chief. They had also succeeded in tearing off a chunk of his nose.
Fret was slammed hard against the ice and the yoyo he'd just managed to get back rolled out of his tired paws. Weakly he spat out a piece of the toad's snout and any blood still in his mouth. He felt sick just looking at it, and searched desperately along the ice for his toy. Connington's gift. The last piece of Redwall he had left...
"You'll die for that!" Slimegut yelled, slamming a fist in between his eyes. The chieftain snatched Fret's head off the ground only to bring it down again. "Stupid! Fake! Warlord!" The ferret was dizzy after the first blow, too dazed and too tired to fight any more. He could hear Momchillo snarling and a toad screaming, Butch crying and Snakeskin shrieking.
Well.
It had sounded like Snakeskin at first, but the second time he heard it more clearly. The pitch was higher than the stoat's and seemed to echo through the air.
"What was that?" A particularly small toad was lifted off the ground by a winged shadow. Two more tore Slimegut off of Fret and a fourth rescued Momchillo.
Panic spread through the Yellowbellies, who began to shout amongst themselves.
"Who'sit?"
"What's going on?"
There came the echo of a scream, and a soft whistling as Slimegut hit the ice a short distance away.
"Chief! Chief are you alright?"
"I'm... fine!" The fat toad groaned and growled. He made to push himself to his feet, but was swiftly slammed back onto the ice by the shadows from before.
"G-geroff me-"
"Silence toad, toad!"
"Be quiet while father speaks, speaks."
The toad tribe watched in horror as dark clouds seemed to pour out of the caves above them. A swarm of bats, dozens and dozens of them came flapping out in a rustle of flapping wings. They were the ones outnumbered now, and they knew it! The beatings stopped abruptly, and as if scared of the evidence, the toads backed away from their victims.
Momchillo, too exhausted to fight any longer, slid to the ground. Palour was returning to his features as relief washed through him. Slimegut was shaking like a leaf, almost pitifully, as the familiar form of Chief Snap landed before him.
The bat chieftain was beaming with pride. "Sap, Tree Fang, good work, work, work." His smile vanished instantly as he turned his gaze towards the pinned toad. Slimegut swallowed audibly. "So this is the bear, bear, bear..." Snap hurled a gob of spittle upon the unfortunate amphibian, before turning to glare at the other toads.
The Yellowbellies screamed in unison, and scattered in panic. Quite a few crashed into each other, even more ran into waiting bats. It was their turn to be afraid now and afeared they were. Helter skelter they scattered, like leaves on a breeze.
"Oh no you don't, don't, don't!" Snap roared. "Round up the toadies! Round them up, up, up!"
Fret couldn't care less about the inevitable capture and brutal punishment of the toads. His friends were surprisingly well-off. Butch was sniffling but seemed unhurt, Snakeskin was sporting a black eye and gently stroking the beaver babe's back. Momchillo was grinning and only seemed to be short a tooth. The same relieved euphoria that had filled the young ferret before the 'bear's' appearance returned with force- as did the exhaustion.
They had won! They were alive! They could still go home!
He was no doubt a mess, and no doubt looked stupid, but Fret smiled the goofiest smile in the world. Everything seemed to be worth it now, the waterfall, getting eaten by Butch, the tunnel, the lake, the other waterfall... even the snakenest! Home felt so tantalizingly close...
The sound of the toads' panicked screaming seemed distant. Gradually it faded away, replaced by his own soft snoring. Not that he could hear it of course, he was far too busy getting some well-deserved rest!
Footnote: Woohoooo! Quite the semi-climax, eh? We should have one or two more chapters of the Bat Arc before leaving Fret and Momchillo (and all the rest) for a little while. I think some celebration is in-order as far as the next chapter (I wanna keep it condensed to one...) is concerned, but there's a fair bit left to get through in regards to where everyone's going.
Sooo... something to look forwards to, eh?