You say this, but when you return to work on Monday, the rumor mill is wild. You are reviewing patient charts at the nursing station when you see your kouhai take a seat beside you.
"Morning," she greets, and there's something in her tone that makes you turn towards her. She is grinning widely, and it immediately makes you suspicious.
"Good morning, Rei," you greet cautiously. "What is happening?"
She hums nonchalantly and boots up the computer beside you. "Oh, just heard from a little birdy you were having a little love affair with a German man."
You choke on the coffee at your desk. "What?"
She is grinning at you fully. "It's all anyone is talking about – your previous passionate love affair with the German man who's moved back to Tokyo to pursue you."
"Oh god," you groan. "This is absolutely out of control," you snatch the overnight reports out of her hands. "None of that is true, and you tell that to whatever little birdy has been spreading these insane rumors," you take another sip of coffee. "I am going to kill Sae."
"Sae?" Rei repeats, somehow even more gleeful at your expense and it reminds you dangerously of Fuji on a hot trail of gossip. "Is that his name?"
"No," you nonchalantly reply, rearranging the reports after a careful review. "It's the name of a dead man."
Saeki is solidly on the train heading back to Chiba when he gets a text from Fuji. He swipes across the screen to open it.
"I've been told a hit has been placed on you."
Saeki chuckles and a woman across the aisle from him raises an eyebrow, which he gives her an apologetic look. "What did I do?" he types back.
"You tell me," Fuji responds immediately.
Saeki thinks back to the lunch he had with you yesterday and grins. "I may have tried to meddle in some of Lita-hime's affairs."
He can almost see Fuji clicking his tongue disapprovingly. "You know exactly what was going to become of that."
Saeki chuckles again, this time more quietly. "But do you think it worked?" he types back.
There is an iconic "…" as Fuji starts a reply, but quickly disappears. There is a brief pause, and then, "we'll see."
Saeki grins and locks his phone screen.
Oishi is finishing rounds in the middle of the week when he catches some hushed whispers between two of his colleagues in the Medicine workroom. He hears your name from their lips and furrows his eyebrows. He's not one to be an eavesdropper, but it isn't every day that your name comes up in his workroom.
"Oishi-san would know," he hears the sentence much louder than the rest and immediately the other man beside shushes him. The two of them glance up and Oishi sees them look at him.
"Yes?" he asks, curiously.
"You know Michi-san pretty well, right?" they ask, and Oishi can already feel the headache coming on.
"You could say that," he answers carefully, not sure where this going.
"Did you know she's been dating this German man who's been pursuing her since middle school?" they ask, eagerly awaiting his response.
"What?" Oishi blinks at the sheer absurdity of the statement. "I don't … what?"
The grin on the first man's face immediate falls. "So, it's not true then?"
Oishi tries to get his sleep-deprived brain to make sense of the information. "Where did you even hear this?" he instead asks.
"The interns were whispering about it before rounds this morning," Horio, the first man, sighs dejectedly.
"See, Horio, you shouldn't believe all rumors immediately," Mitsuhiko chides, and Oishi shoots him a grateful look.
"It just sounded so cool," he shakes his head, almost comically, and Oishi is still trying to use this time to digest this new information. "Chiharu-chan even said it was the ultimate love story! Can you imagine? Childhood sweethearts who's love spans across continents?"
"I … I don't think that's true, I'm sorry," Oishi manages out. "I don't even think Lita is seeing anyone right now, so I'm not sure how you all heard about this."
"It can't be!" Horio exclaims dramatically. "Chiharu-chan said it came from the mouth of Michi-san's own super-duper attractive best friend!"
Oishi can feel the headache coming on already and decides he hasn't had enough coffee to deal with any of this conversation right now. "I … would be careful about what you hear," he simply responds.
"We're sorry for asking," Mitsuhiko bows at Oishi and nudges Horio to do the same. "We were just curious!" they immediately scamper out of the room and Oishi is left in the workroom by himself staring blankly at his computer screen. As much as he wanted to focus back on his paperwork, he couldn't help his curious mind from trying to make sense of this information.
German man pursuing her? Oishi shakes his head. What a wild story for the interns to have cooked up. He scans the patient's file in front of him and types some new orders in. And who told them this? Her super-duper attractive best friend? Fuji?
Oishi furrows his eyebrows. Sure, Fuji was attractive and the tensai had always had his share of admirers, but hadn't Horio met Fuji before? He must have. Fuji had been a constant plus-one for you at many of the hospital events. Surely the two would have known if it was Fuji who was the source of these rumors. He takes out his phone and thinks about texting the brunette when his finger hovers over the send button as another thought sinks over him. Saeki?
Oishi puts his phone down and rubs his temples, trying to will his brain to cooperate as he passes through this information. Okay, maybe it was Saeki, he was here this weekend. Oishi sighs. Saeki was much more chaotic and no less mischievous than Fuji, his better-known counterpart. But a German man pursuing Lita across oceans? What on Earth could they be talking about?
To the best of Oishi's knowledge, the only person any of them even remotely knew of well enough who had spent time in Germany was Tezuka. Sure, they met a few of the tennis members from Germany in middle and high school, especially during the U-17, but the chances you knew any of them were extremely low. You had taken an active role in your own club events and hadn't gone to that many tennis tournaments, let alone any oversees tournaments.
Could they be talking about Tezuka? Oishi purses his lips and pauses to consider that thought. The chances that Saeki knew about Tezuka's feelings seemed slim. Saeki and Tezuka probably didn't know each other well enough to speak about each other in any way other than their brief tennis interactions. Sure, Fuji knew Tezuka well enough, but did the tensai know about Tezuka's feelings? Possibly, Oishi felt himself smile at the thought. Tezuka was subtle in his affection for the woman, but Oishi, and likely Fuji, who knew him long enough felt like it was as obvious as a flashlight in the darkness. He likes to think he is the only person who Tezuka has likely confirmed his feelings for the woman, but maybe the man had his own conversations with Fuji?
Oishi takes another second and a large swig of coffee. Okay, so it was maybe Saeki who had told the general surgery interns about your superfluous love affair with a mysterious German man. If it wasn't about Tezuka's feelings for you … could this be about your feelings?
Oishi feels himself suddenly sit up straighter in his chair. The two of you had been long-time friends since middle school. Sure, he was more of Tezuka's friend and you were more friends with Fuji and Kikumaru, but he like to think he had known you for just as long. Nonetheless, you had always been harder for him to read than Tezuka, even after the two of you went through medical school together and become much better friends. He always had a sneaking suspicion about your feelings for his best friend, but you reminded him a lot of Fuji – always careful in how much you shared with the world.
Oishi's phone chimes and he glances at the screen to see a text from Eiji. He swipes it open to see an invitation in the Seigaku group chat for a dinner party at the Kikumaru residence this coming weekend.
He smiles. Eiji had texted earlier to confirm neither you nor him were on call this weekend. He knew Tezuka had just finished a large case and was currently between cases. Fuji was always busy as a reporter, unfortunately, but hopefully the man would be in town this weekend for the meet-up.
He sits up and shoots a response text to Eiji confirming his attendance and then another quick text to Hana to see if she was free to join. Maybe this was the push Tezuka would need to finally tell you about his feelings. He smiles and turns back to his paperwork, feeling satisfied with himself and his new plan for this weekend.
Kikumaru, devastated that he missed Saeki last weekend, insists on inviting you all out to his house this weekend. You know that his and his wife have been mildly overwhelmed with their youngest child, who has recently started walking and delivering a whole new world of chaos to the young family, so you immediately accept their invitation for a dinner party and offer to show up early to help with setting up.
"Don't worry about it," Naoko immediately replies when you call her about it. "Eiji has been talking about having you all over for weeks now, so this was just the best weekend for all of us. However, if you want to come a little early to watch Anya for a little bit, we wouldn't say no."
You reassure her that you would love to spend some extra time with the young toddler and genuinely spend the week excited for this gathering. When Saturday arrives, you make sure you've brought a healthy supply of new presents for the toddler before you ring the doorbell.
Kikumaru flings open the door in his usual excited welcome and it makes you giggle a little. He drags you into the house and leads you straight to the toddler, who has somehow already managed to knock over another cup of juice in the couple seconds it takes Kikumaru to lead you back into the house. Naoko immediately appears out of thin air and mops up the mess on the table before casting you a grateful look and greeting you.
You reassure her you are happy to take over babysitting duties for an hour or so while she finishes cooking. Kikumaru gives you a big hug and flies out the door to grab some last-minute supplies and you deposit yourself with the young toddler and whip out your supply of new toys for entertainment. Anya is incredibly smart for her age, and you get the feeling this is also likely some of the chaotic energy the toddler brings.
The doorbell rings less than an hour later. Kikumaru is still at the store and Naoko asks if you're able to answer it for them. You scoop up Anya (making sure that she doesn't get her hands on anything that can be accidentally eaten or spilled) and open it. You see Tezuka blink twice, eyes trailing to the young toddler in your arms, and you grin.
"Hey," you greet and let him in. "I'm on Anya duty," you explain.
"Ah," he nods, and closes the door behind himself now that your hands are full with the squirming child.
"Tezuka-san!" Naoko greets from the kitchen. "Please make yourself at home. And thank you for bringing the sushi!" she grabs the box from his arms. "Eiji will be home any second now. Can I grab you both something to drink?"
"I'm okay," you tell her and Tezuka shakes his head. She disappears back into the kitchen and you release Anya from your hold. The two-year-old immediately makes a beeline to the discarded blocks on the floor.
"How are you?" you ask, following the toddler to make sure she doesn't actually get into trouble.
"Good," he answers briefly. "You?"
"Better," you smile. "It's been a crazy week at the hospital, but at least I'm not on call this weekend."
Tezuka nods and makes eye contact with the two-year-old, who is now squinting at him. "And how are you, Anya-chan?" he asks, kneeling down to the level of the child.
You watch, amused, as the young toddler abandons the toys and hobbles over the man. Tezuka raises an eyebrow but catches her before she tumbles into him. "Jiji," she announces.
"Is that me?" Tezuka asks and makes eye contact with your amused expression.
"I would say so," you laugh as the toddler lifts her arms up in a clear request for being picked up. Tezuka obliges, lifting the child casually. "You're surprisingly popular with the young children," you cross your arms and smirk.
Tezuka quirks a small smile. "Does that surprise you?" he asks and reaches for a small stuffed animal he sees Anya stretching for. "I've had to watch my nephews a couple times," he explains.
Maybe it's because it's been a while since you've seen Tezuka, let alone a fully-relaxed Tezuka, with his shirt sleeves rolled up and casual dress pants, but there's something in his amused tone that makes your heart flutter. His eyes flicker towards you, still keeping an eye out for the toddler who has now viciously tossed her stuffed rabbit to the ground and he raises an eyebrow at your silence.
You shake your head and try to calm your heart. It was completely irrational to have these feelings for a totally normal interaction with a long-time friend, regardless of how good he looked currently in the moment. Luckily, the door opening saves you and you both turn to see Kikumaru returning with Oishi, Hana and Fuji closely in tow.
"Ah, Tezuka!" Kikumaru's mouth drops at the young toddler in his arms, peacefully sucking her thumb. "Uh, oh wow, hi."
"Kikumaru," he greets, and you can tell he's amused as he hands the toddler back to her dad.
"Uh, thanks for watching her," Kikumaru blinks twice and looks at you, and you just shrug, also amused at the surprise on the man's face. "Come on in. Take a seat you all, I'll take Anya and I think Naoko should almost be done."
You greet Oishi and Hana, who is still newer to the group, and invite her to sit next to you and Fuji. She gives you a grateful look.
"What?" you raise an eyebrow as Fuji chuckles beside you in amusement.
"Pity none of us got a picture of Tezuka with Anya," he answers quietly, and settles beside you. Tezuka and Oishi sit across the table from you both and Naoko brings out some of the meat Kikumaru just picked up to grill at the table.
"That could go for good money," you laugh and watch Kikumaru set Anya down in her own highchair.
Naoko and Kikumaru settle down next to the end of the table. "Hoi hoi," the enthusiastic redhead claps. "Welcome everyone, and thanks for coming!" he grabs some of the meat and places it on the grill. "Help yourself!"
You, Naoko, and Hana are currently in the kitchen, preparing some of the smaller desserts that the latter brought for the group.
"How are you and Oishi?" Naoko asks, slicing some of the fruit for a platter she's building.
"Good," Hana beams, and seeing her and Oishi so happy grins a small smile to your face.
"I hear the two of you were thinking of Hokkaido for Valentine's Day?" you casually mention, and the blush that lights her face makes you and Naoko laugh.
"We'll see," she pretends to fiddle with the ribbon on the cake box Fuji had brought. "We're still deciding."
Naoko gives you a playful glare at how embarrassed the young nurse currently looks and changes the subject. "Lita, can you grab those teacups on the table and see if anyone needs a refill?" she nods towards the dining room around the corner and you hold your hands up.
"Fine fine," you roll your eyes and exit the kitchen. You know Kikumaru is upstairs, likely putting Anya to bed. It is just Tezuka and Oishi in the dining room, so you assume Fuji has stepped out to use the bathroom or the like.
You don't mean to eavesdrop, but you see the two of them speaking in hushed whispers and it stops you in your tracks. Both of them have their backs turned to you.
"I'm just saying, I think you should tell her, Tezuka," Oishi's voice is soft but confident.
Her? Your eyes widen. First of all, you had no idea that Tezuka even had a 'her' in his life. You initially feel a little betrayed that Tezuka, of all people, hadn't bothered to tell any of you except Oishi about this 'her,' and then of course, you recognize that familiar feeling of jealous creeping in. Which is absurd, you try to swallow the green envy monster. I have no right to be jealous.
"Oishi," Tezuka sounds a little exasperated, and if you weren't so invested in what this conversation would possibly be about, it would have made you laugh. "We've talked about this before."
"I know," Oishi sighs. "I just want what's best for you both. I think you would both be good for each other. She's amazing, Tezuka, and kind and intelligent. I don't understand what's stopping you."
Wow, this sounded serious. Maybe it wasn't the best idea that you were listening around the corner. You take a step back and are about to head back to the kitchen, ready to make an excuse about why you weren't able to grab the extra teacups when you hear Tezuka's voice.
"Oishi. That isn't the kind of relationship I want right now with her. It would just be a distraction."
There's something about the way that he says those words that really slices through you. Not only was Tezuka not interested at dating, but he was actively calling this seemingly perfect human a distraction. You stand there briefly, a little stunned. It wasn't exactly that you had thought that you had a chance at all with Tezuka, but you still find those words a little soul-crushing.
For a second, you debate if you would rather walk back into the kitchen or loudly announce yourself before making it back into the dining room. Both don't sound like great options right then, especially since your throat is feeling a little tight and you truly have no idea how to explain why you would be crying to literally anyone at that exact second. Instead, you head deeper into the hallway and try to take a deep breath, calming yourself.
The toilet flushes across from you and you startle. You get a couple seconds of the sink faucet turning on and off before Fuji emerges from the bathroom. The man gives you one look in the hallway and you see his eyes open in surprise. Well, so much for being subtle.
"What happened?" he asks, eyes deadly serious.
"I…" you don't really have the right words to explain so instead you try to muster a smile at your best friend, which even you know doesn't look the slightest bit convincing. "I'm fine."
Fuji raises an eyebrow. "Clearly not," he responds flatly.
You take a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I … I don't want to talk about it right now."
Fuji continues to look at you for another second or two. "Okay," he says finally.
This time, a small, genuinely grateful smile makes it through.
"Do you want to go home?" Fuji asks, raising an eyebrow.
"No no no," you shake your head and clear your throat when your voice wobbles a little. "We don't get to do this that often with all of us. Don't let me ruin this."
Fuji hasn't moved and continues to watch you carefully. "Alright," he answers slowly. "We'll leave in an hour."
"Syuu," you giggle at your overprotective friend. "I am fine. Seriously. Go back out there. I'll join you guys in a little bit."
Fuji looks like he is seriously debating whether he should push you on this subject or not, but to your relief, he just nods and disappears back around the corner. You let out a breath of relief and stare at yourself in the mirror.
"I can do this," you mutter to yourself. "Don't be an idiot."