Dallas, Texas
October 1978
Sue Ellen had thought nothing could faze her anymore, but the smell of the hospital was too much to bear. It reminded her far too much of her own recent stay. While she never regretted the end result, there were moments she wished she'd handled things differently. Losing so much blood she'd passed out, and almost permanently damaging her internal organs hadn't been her intention, but it had happened. Even the medication she was on now couldn't stabilise her mood when she was surrounded by so many reminders.
That's why, while Jock lay in bed fighting for his life after a heart attack, she was at home with Lucy. Unsurprisingly, Lucy had reacted selfishly to the news, crying about how she didn't want to grow old like her granddaddy, instead of worrying whether he would live or die.
Sue Ellen was concerned about Jock. She didn't want to see him die, even if she hadn't cared much for him while he was alive. So, she kept in touch with JR throughout the day, checking in and offering her support from afar.
John Ross was a good distraction from what was happening at Dallas Memorial. Pamela had been out of the house more and more recently, leaving Sue Ellen in the position she should have always held: mother. Mrs Reeves bathed, fed, and diapered little John, but for the most part, Sue Ellen was his primary caregiver. She was his mother, and she loved that for both of them.
Hospitals were not JR's favourite place. In fact, unless visiting a healthy newborn, he couldn't think of a single reason why anyone would find the environment comforting. The cardiac ward was nothing like the maternity ward; it wasn't pastel-coloured with cartoon animals on the walls or filled with smiling nurses. Here, everyone seemed hurried and serious, and for good reason.
Before his daddy's heart attack, the last time he had been in a hospital was after Sue Ellen's breakdown, a memory he'd rather forget. Maternity was warm and inviting, but women's health in general wasn't so cheerful. Sue Ellen's transfer to inpatient psychiatric care, before finally moving to Brooktree Psychiatric, had been almost too much to handle. They'd gotten through it, however, and Sue Ellen was better than ever now. But her continued avoidance of medical settings was telling. She was just as haunted by the experience as he was, if not more. She had no desire to be reminded of that time, even now, when someone else's crisis was at hand.
Miss Ellie was driving Jock nuts. He'd had a heart attack and survived; he was strong, but she was treating him like an invalid.
He wasn't supposed to know where the trouble lay, Bobby and JR were handling business matters amongst themselves. Not going into the office, however, left him with far too much time on his hands. Time that Ellie insisted he spend at home.
At first, he'd let her fuss over him, but after one too many times, he'd snapped at her to leave him be. They paid Teresa and Raoul to help around the house; there wasn't a single thing she could do that someone else couldn't, especially when all he was allowed to do these days was unproductive.
The DOA kept his wife busy, The Store kept Pamela busy, Ewing Oil and Southfork Ranch kept the boys busy. He didn't really know what kept Lucy busy, but pleasantly, John Ross kept Sue Ellen busy.
He delighted in seeing his boy grow from newborn to a real baby, soon to be a toddler, his balance improving each day with walking likely to come soon. He also took pleasure in what he'd done for Sue Ellen. Her mood had improved significantly since he arranged for Doctor Brooks' prescription. A few months ago, she'd made a point of avoiding him, but now her demeanour was no longer so cold. She included him in little John's activities when he was nearby, and was generally friendly, making him feel optimistic about the future again.
Yet, when little John was asleep, the house felt too quiet. It was hard not to dwell on the fact that if Sue Ellen hadn't so callously ended the chance for a new addition to the family, there would be a buzz about the house in anticipation of a late January arrival.
Pamela had made it clear she wasn't interested in trying for another baby anytime soon, and it wasn't because she wasn't physically ready, it was her new job. He disapproved of her working, and he'd told Bobby so, but his son and newest daughter-in-law always did as they pleased, so he doubted his opinion would change anything.
That left him to focus on Sue Ellen. He couldn't let what happened before happen again; that wouldn't do. But JR had already shown he was eager to please him, seeking his approval. If Jock planted the idea in JR's head that they should build Sue Ellen's confidence up slowly this time, then maybe, just maybe, they had a fighting chance.