A Long Way Home
Chapter 25
Day 7: Morning
Blake quickly stepped off of the Manta almost the second it touched down, Yang, Clover, and Marrow coming down the ramp right behind her. She let out an anxious breath, glad to be back on the familiar ground of the Academy.
Their foray into the lower city had hardly been relaxing. The whole "Heroes of Atlas" outing had essentially devolved into displaced people from Mantle asking questions about their missing loved ones and when rescue operations would resume, none of which any of the four of them had the answers or authority to answer. She felt for them, she really did, but she couldn't give them the answers they were looking for, just meaningless "I'm sorry"s and sympathetic touches. She could see in their eyes that it wasn't enough and the people left disappointed more often than not.
Thankfully, the trip hadn't been a complete disaster; Yang, Blake, and Clover had brought Marrow into their conspiracy, telling him everything they knew about Ironwood and how he'd abandoned Mantle, and how he seemed to know a lot more about Ruby and Weiss' disappearance than he let on. The more they'd told Marrow, the angrier his face had gotten and he promised them that once they figured out what to do, they could rely on him to help in whatever way he could.
A few minutes ago, on the flight back up to the academy, they'd discussed talking to Penny and bringing her in on the conspiracy, but moments later they had seen a green streak launch from the academy and fly down to the lower city, aggressively raining green fire on the few remaining pockets of Grimm. They decided to wait until the evening to talk to Penny, as she seemed to be working through something. So Blake and Yang had decided to just head back to the dorm room until they received new orders.
Marrow gave the three of them a nod as he headed off in a different direction; he had received new orders earlier and had to be elsewhere, supervising the training of some cadets. Before they landed, he had made them promise to keep him apprised of any plans they made regarding Ironwood; with everything that he had seen Ironwood do in the hanger, it was personal for him now as well.
Blake watched Yang give him a tired wave as the Ace operative word off. The last few days had really taken it out of both of them, one disaster after another crashing over them like waves. Blake could see Yang was putting on a brave face, but it was obvious she was exhausted and worried underneath it. Blake understood, she felt the same way.
Clover kept pace with them as they headed towards the Academy entrance. Blake noticed that his jaw was clenched and that he had been somewhat quieter than he normally was the whole morning, but she couldn't really blame him with everything that was going on.
"Well," Clover said suddenly, stopping a dozen meters away from the main doors to the Academy, "I have a surprise inspection in one of the soldier's barracks. Can't be letting discipline slide, especially not now. The two of you be sure to get plenty of rest, you did great work down there."
Clover hesitated and seemed to study the two of them for a moment; Blake saw a flash of emotion pass across his features. He opened his mouth as if he was going to say something else, but instead he just gave a nod then turned and walked towards the barracks.
"Don't bust their asses too much!" Yang called after him as Blake tried to figure out what that had been about. She saw Yang flinch at her own quip. Blake had heard it too, Yang was forcing jokes, desperate to have some sense of normalcy; trying to forget about Ruby and Weiss for just a moment. Clover gave them a wave but didn't turn back or stop walking. Blake gave her partner a sympathetic smile and Yang grinned sheepishly in return as they turned back towards the entrance. Blake was surprised to see Winter standing a few feet in front of the doors, clearly waiting for them.
"Hey Winter!" Yang called out as they approached the older woman, "You're back!" Blake could hear the hope in her partner's voice, echoed by the feeling in her own chest; if Winter was back then she had found them, Ruby and Weiss were back in Atlas.
"And not in prison somehow." Blake added with a small smirk on her lips.
"Oh, the General would love to have me in prison…" Winter replied quietly, a dark look coming over her face, but she didn't elaborate any further.
Winter, similar to Clover, seemed to study the two of them for a moment. Blake stared right back at her. Winter was hard to read on the best of days, and doubly so today, as if she was trying to conceal her emotions.
"Soooo…" Yang said, a note of impatience in her voice, "Did you find them?"
Blake shared Yang's annoyance, Winter seemed to just be stalling or ignoring the obvious question that they were clearly desperate to know.
"We…we did." Winter said slowly.
"Yes!" Yang said, her shoulders relaxing somewhat, a relieved grin passing across her face, Blake's own heart soared. "Where are they?"
Winter's jaw clenched, "The ICU."
Blake's breath hitched, the nagging fear at the back of her mind coming forward once again. "Both of them?" she asked, trying to gauge Winter's reaction.
Winter seemed to sag, "No…just Weiss." Blake's heart began to hammer in her chest. Why would Ruby and Weiss be apart? They spent all their time together. Especially if one of them was hurt.
She saw Yang's eyes narrow in confusion "Then…Ruby's back in the dorm?" the blonde asked, Blake could clearly hear the desperation in her voice, mirroring her own fear, desperate to find an explanation for all of this that wasn't-
Winter's jaw started trembling, she opened her mouth and tried to speak but no sound came out. The white-haired woman bit her lip and shook her head, tears beginning to gather in the corners of her eyes.
And Blake knew.
Oh, she knew.
The realization hit her in the chest like a physical blow. There was only one explanation as to why Ruby and Weiss were apart. One explanation as to why Winter couldn't even speak the words to tell them how their friends and family were doing. Blake's legs started shaking. She couldn't move. She could barely breathe.
"I'm so sorry…" Winter finally managed to choke out, the words barely audible.
Blake quickly looked over at Yang, just in time to see the realization hit her. Yang's pupils widened to black pools of panic, her mouth dropped open in shock. She was silent for a long moment, her eyes darting around, looking down at her boots, clearly not processing anything she was seeing.
"Where?" Yang finally whispered after almost a full minute of silence, the word barely audible even to Blake.
"W-What?" Winter asked, not having been close enough to hear.
"WHERE IS SHE?!" Yang screamed, snapping her head up, her eyes red and wild; both Blake and Winter jumped, startled at her sudden ferocity.
"Th-the morgue…" Winter stuttered out, pointing a shaking finger at the hospital wing.
Then Yang was gone, pushing past Winter and slamming open the main doors of the Academy.
Blake lurched into motion, almost involuntarily, following quickly in the wake of her running partner.
Suddenly, Blake found herself in the hospital wing of the academy, just outside the morgue, Yang's broad shoulders filling the doorway in front of her. She couldn't really remember how she'd gotten here, her mind lost, desperately trying to process what had happened. She heard Winter's voice somewhere behind them, presumably making excuses and apologizing for them.
Yang made a soft whimper in her throat, but pushed through the door and stepped into the room anyway, Blake following close behind. The walls of the room were lined with silver pull-out cabinets. Blake shivered, and not just because the room was cold enough to see her breath. In the middle of the room four bodies lay on metal tables, covered from head to toe in white sheets.
Blake's eyes were immediately drawn to the smallest body, lying at the far end of the room. Yang had clearly potted it before her, as she was already making her way towards it, her steps hesitant and slow.
Winter stepped into the doorway and quietly cleared her throat, "Weiss is in room 703, whenever you're ready. I was just informed that she woke up."
Without turning around, Blake gave her an acknowledging wave, then heard the door close, leaving the two of them alone in the room. They stood in front of the covered body for a long time. Blake didn't want to move, it felt like they were on a precipice, about to plunge in the abyss if they even twitched.
Eventually, Yang reached out towards the edge of the sheet, her hand trembling. She grasped the sheet but stopped, her jaw clenching. She shook her head, "I can't…" she gasped.
Blake reached out, placing her hand on the sheet next to Yang's. "Together." she said quietly. Yang nodded gratefully. As one, they pulled the sheet back, just enough to expose the body's head and shoulders.
There she was.
Ruby.
Next to her, a choked whimper escaped Yang's throat and she felt her partner sag. Reality came crashing in on Blake, the news hadn't fully sunk in until this moment. Seeing her friend's body right there…she felt like she was being crushed, pushed into the ground by the sheer weight of the last few days.
She saw Yang reach out, her trembling fingers gently brushing Ruby's cheek. Blake was at least thankful that Ruby's face looked at ease, there was even a small smile on her lips. Her death seemed to have been peaceful, hopefully free of pain and anguish. That was more than a lot of people got in their line of work. Blake frowned, her eyes drawn to the purple veins marking the skin on Ruby's face and neck.
Before she could make heads or tails of that, Yang, by herself this time, pulled the sheet down further, exposing Ruby's torso. Gods, she looked so small stripped of her gear. She was thankful that the coroner hadn't begun the examination yet, there were no incisions or stitches on her form. Blake saw that the purple veins continued down her whole body, seeming to emanate from one of the two wounds close to Ruby's navel.
She heard Yang inhale sharply next to her and leaned over, trying to get a better look at something. Blake followed her gaze further up Ruby's body to a wound right over her heart. A wound surrounded by flakes of dried blood. A wound that had clearly ended her life. A wound that Blake was horrified to realize that she knew. A fatal injury that she had seen on many a Grimm, just before they dissolved into ash. She knew exactly what weapon had caused this.
The temperature next to her shot up and she knew that Yang had figured it out too.
"Yan-" she started to say, but Yang, her eyes blood-red and her hair ablaze, let out a feral scream as she spun around and sprinted out of the room, leaving Blake once again to trail in her partner's wake. She spared a quick glance back at Ruby, they couldn't just leave her like that. She gently covered her back up with a shaky hand and a whispered apology before sprinting off after Yang.
She must have gone into a fugue state again, because the next thing she fully registered was cries of surprise as her partner stalked down the hospital hallway, the fire rolling down her shoulders hot enough to set off a few of the sprinklers along the way. Yang strode straight towards Weiss' room, hospital staff practically jumping to get out of her way.
Yang slammed the door to the room open and stood in the doorway, her entire body shaking. Looking around Yang's shoulders Blake was just able to see Weiss. She was sitting up, dressed in a hospital gown and appeared to be staring out the window. Blake could see a series of wires attached to various points on Weiss' skin, linking her to machines next to her bed. She slowly turned to look at the two of them and Blake's heart sank. Weiss' gaze was practically empty, her eyes glazed and dull.
Before Blake even had a chance to react, Yang let out a scream of rage and surged into the room, cocking her metal fist back. Completely on instinct Blake triggered her semblance and appeared behind Yang, grabbing her elbow, trying to stop her from doing something stupid. Something she'd regret.
But it was too late.
Yang's fist snapped forward, but not with the amount of force that Blake had been anticipating. The blow connected with Weiss' left cheek, sending her tumbling from the hospital bed and onto the ground.
Weiss looked up at them from the floor, her hand on her cheek but her gaze still empty. Snapping her head over, Blake saw that Yang's face was a mask of shock and horror, as if she'd just come out of a dream, clearly surprised at what she'd done. The flames in her hair went out almost instantly.
A large, muscley nurse ran into the room and saw Weiss on the floor, "What happened?" the man yelled, "Did you do this?" he spun towards the door, "Securi-"
"I fell." Weiss' voice was scratchy but firm, "I was startled when they came in. I fell out of bed and hit my cheek. It's ok…" Blake heard Yang give a soft gasp as she realized what Weiss was doing.
The man fixed the two of them with a withering glare before a moment before huffing grumpily and moving around the bed and crouched down next to Weiss. He spent a few moments checking her for major injuries. After he was satisfied that she was alright, the big man scooped her up in his arms and gently placed her back in the bed. Blake's eyes widened and she slapped a hand over her mouth, trying to stifle a startled cry but was only half successful.
Weiss' left leg was gone, amputated just above the knee, the stump heavily wrapped in bandages. It was quickly hidden from their sight as the nurse pulled the blanket over Weiss' legs. The nurse moved over to one of the machines at the side of the bed and began to take readings.
Weiss' empty gaze turned to Yang who visibly flinched. "I-I can't." the blonde said, her voice breaking, "I have to go." She turned and headed for the door, Blake right behind her.
"Yang stop…" Blake pleaded, "She had to have a reason…she wouldn't just-"
"I know." Yang said, stopping in the doorway. "I know…I saw the purple veins, I get it. But I can't be here right now." She turned back towards Blake, tears in her eyes.
Blake started towards her, but Yang deliberately backed out of her reach. The anguish already in Blake's heart just deepened. "Wh-Where are you going?" she asked, trying and failing to keep her voice steady.
"The training room." Yang replied simply, clenching her fists, "I'm going to hit things until my hands are numb and I'm too tired to think anymore."
"Do you want me to come with you?" Blake asked, already knowing the answer.
"No." Yang said, shaking her head, "Someone needs to be there for her." she said, staring at Weiss, "Because I can't be…not right now."
Yang turned and plodded down the hallway, oblivious to the glares the nurses and doctors she passed were directing at her.
The large nurse finished taking what readings he needed off of the machines next to Weiss' bed, Blake stepped aside as he headed towards the door.
"No more trouble now, y'hear?" he growled as he swept past her.
Blake nodded numbly as the door closed behind him. After a moment, she grabbed one of the chairs that sat against the wall and pulled it up next to Weiss' bed. The white-haired girl didn't even look at her as she sat down, she just continued to stare at her hands clasped in her lap. Blake waited for Weiss to say something, to do anything. But the other woman just sat there, staring at nothing, hardly even moving.
The bruise on Weiss' cheek had fully disappeared by the time Blake found the courage to break the deafening silence.
"Are…are you ok?" it was the only thing she could think to ask. She flinched the second the words came out of her mouth.
Weiss slowly looked up, her gaze still empty, her lack of expression an answer in itself.
"Fair. Sorry." Blake said quickly. There was another long silence and Blake couldn't stand it. The quiet was pressing down on her, crushing her until she almost couldn't breathe.
"She asked you to do it, didn't she?" she said quickly, "She was dying."
That got Weiss' attention, her head snapping up in surprise. After a moment, she nodded, her expression glum.
"I'm sorry." Blake said softly, putting her hand on the mattress. "I can only imagine how you feel right now."
"You can't." Weiss croaked, her voice scratchy from disuse, "You don't know what it's like. You have no idea."
"Actually…" Blake said slowly, "I do know…I know all too well." she fell silent, looking down at her hands as she gathered her thoughts.
"We…When I was in the White Fang," she said after a while, still not looking at Weiss, "We raided an SDC dust mine by hijacking one of their transport trains as it was leaving the loading depot." she paused, the memories were still painful even though it had been years ago. "It…it was a trap. We quickly figured out that the train cars were filled with SDC security instead of dust. We aborted the mission and jumped off the train. We started to run into the nearby woods but one of my fellow fighters was shot. Hit in the spine, instantly paralyzed from the waist down and fell into the grass."
Her throat threatened to close but she pushed through. "The train was stopping so the security forces could chase us down…he didn't want to be taken alive…the SDC isn't kind to White Fang prisoners to say the least, he knew what awaited him in custody. He…he asked me to end it before they got to him." She swallowed hard, trying to clear the lump in her throat. She was staring down at her hands, but all she could see was Gambol Shroud clutched in a white-knuckle grip a lifetime ago.
"I did it." she finally managed to choke out, "I made it quick so he didn't suffer…" she looked up, Weiss' eyes were focused on her now, clear and lucid. "I didn't know him." Blake continued, "Not even his name, but I'll never forget the grateful look on his face as he died. But it didn't stop me from having nightmares about it for months afterwards."
"What I'm saying is…" Blake said after a moment, "I don't fully understand what you're going through, but I get it. Some of it at least."
Weiss was silent for a long moment, "Ruby told me that you would understand." she said softly.
"She's the only other person I've shared that with…I'll tell Yang eventually…just not now."
Blake realized that her fist was clenched in the blankets on Weiss' bed, she hadn't realized just how much the memories would have affected her. Weiss also noticed and reached out to touch her white-knuckled hand.
Unbidden, a series of images sprang into Blake's head. Images of Weiss' hand coated in blood, images of Weiss running Ruby through with her sword, images of Ruby dying.
She flinched.
She recoiled and pulled her hand away from Weiss. She pulled away from one of her closest friends, from the person that had ended the life of her leader. She couldn't help it and instantly regretted it. She could only watch as the little bit of Weiss she'd managed to piece back together shatter all over again.
Weiss' outstretched hand dropped lifelessly to rest on the sump of her leg, her eyes turning dull and unfocused. Weiss turned away from her and stared out the window again.
"I'm so sorry…" Blake whispered desperately, her voice breaking, "I didn't mean to."
If Weiss heard her, she gave no indication. Blake stood up, deciding to leave before she did anymore damage to her friend. She exited the room, tears in her eyes, shame and guilt trailing in her wake.
Blake ran straight back to the dorm, pausing for a moment in front of the door, trying to work up the nerve to enter the empty room, to find the courage to face what was inside. Eventually she opened the door and entered the cold and vacant room. Ruby and Weiss' empty beds seemed to fill the space, a brand new pang of anguish stabbing into her heart as she looked at Ruby's unmade, rumpled covers.
Blake stood there, looking at the beds for a long time. Standing until her legs began to tremble. She went to the back of the room and slowly slid down the wall, hugging her knees to her chest. After a few minutes her scroll chimed. Some hospital administrator, a weird, desperate edge to his message, informed her that she had to keep Ruby's death and her knowledge of Weiss' condition secret under penalty of imprisonment until the official announcement was made. Blake agreed easily. She had no desire to speak to anyone about any of it. No one except Yang, and even then there was still a big part of her that was furious at her.
How could she have hit Weiss? How dare she treat her like that.
On the other hand, a part of Blake understood why Yang had done it, there was some anger towards Weiss burning inside her as well. She knew it was unfair and misplaced but it was still there.
And there was fear inside her as well. Blake shivered violently as the moment she had flinched away from Weiss replayed itself in her mind. Her brain forced her to watch as Weiss' soul shattered all over again. She was terrified now that she'd lost two teammates in one day.
No…Ruby wasn't just a teammate, neither was Weiss, but Ruby…Other than Yang, Ruby was her best friend, a person she could tell just about anything to, someone she deeply admired. And now…she was just…gone. She never got to tell her how much her friendship meant to her.
She hugged her knees closer as tears began to stream down her cheeks, losing herself in her memories and grief.
Day 7: Evening
Hours later, still huddled on the same spot on the wall, Blake was woken up by the slow opening of the dorm room door. She rubbed the crust out of her puffy eyes and saw Yang come into the room and turn on the light. Blake flinched and blinked in the brightness.
Yang was soaked in sweat and had a towel wrapped around the knuckles of her left hand. She stared at Blake for a moment, her own eyes red and puffy. "I'm…I'm going to take a shower." she said and quickly headed into the bathroom, shutting the door behind her.
Anger flared inside Blake and she sprang off the wall as she heard the water start running in the bathroom. How dare Yang's first words to her -after being gone for hours- be "I'm going to take a shower."? How dare she lash out at Weiss like that? How dare-
The water shut off, almost as soon as it started flowing. A moment later the door to the bathroom opened up and Yang slowly stepped back out.
"Blake…I-"
"What the FUCK Yang!?" Blake blurted, whirling on her partner, unable to keep her anger inside anymore, "How could you-?"
Blake cut her tirade off as she became aware of a rhythmic dripping sound. She quickly realized that a stream of blood was dripping onto the floor from Yang's knuckles which were swollen and raw.
Yang where she was staring and immediately looked guilty, bringing her hand to her chest, "Uh…I ran out of aura and-"
Blake roughly pushed past Yang, stalking into the bathroom and grabbed their first-aid kit.
"Sit." she commanded, practically shoving her partner onto the mattress. She angrily opened up the kit and began cleaning the blood off of Yang's hand. "How dare you hit her like that." Blake snapped, pouring disinfectant onto her knuckles, "Weiss is your teammate, one of our closest friends." she looked into Yang's eyes, "Did you honestly think she killed Ruby in cold blood?"
"I…I don't know what I thought…" Yang said, looking away, unable to meet Blake's gaze, shame overtaking her features. "I just saw red…complete blind rage. I-I thought I was past that but…Weiss was the only person I could blame at the moment." she hung her head, "It's no excuse…I'm just so sorry…"
Blake sighed, her anger ebbing slightly. "You pulled your punch." she said after a few moments, looking back down and applying gauze to Yang's knuckles, "I felt it when I grabbed your elbow. Why?"
"I…" a strangled whimper came from Yang's throat. Blake looked up and saw tears welling in her partner's eyes, "She-she wanted it." Yang managed to choke out, "She wanted me to hurt her. She was relieved…that was what snapped me out of it." She swallowed heavily, "I tried to stop but it was too late…and then she lied for me after I put her on the ground. I…what kind of monster am I?" Yang stared at her shaking metal hand.
Blake gently covered it with her own, stilling the trembling metal. "You're not." she said softly, "You're just human." She sighed, "I can't judge, even if I wanted to. We…after you left we talked for a bit. I saw her start to piece some of herself back together. And then…" she tried to choke down a sob and failed miserably. "I broke her…she reached out for my hand and I flinched away, because for a moment I only saw her as a murderer." she swallowed the big lump in her throat. "I saw her shatter all over again Yang…I-I killed whatever was left of Weiss." She quickly busied herself in taping the gauze to Yang's knuckles, unable to meet her partner's eyes.
"It didn't help." Yang said after a moment.
"What?"
"Hitting things to forget. My hand just hurts now." Yang's fingers trembled under the bandage. "It didn't work yesterday, I don't know why I thought it would work now…Because…" Blake saw water begin to drip into Yang's lap. She looked up to see tears streaming down her face. "Because no amount of punching things can take away the fact that she's gone."
Yang's eyes widened, having finally voiced the terrible truth aloud.
She turned to Blake, her face a mask of pure anguish. "Ruby's gone, Blake…sh-she's gone…"
Blake quickly lunged forward and quickly pulled Yang into a hug just before a sob escaped her throat, echoing through the empty room.
Yang pulled her close, burying her face in Blake's shoulder, her tears beginning to soak into the fabric of her coat. Blake clung to her in turn, digging her nails into Yang's back, hanging on as tight as she could to the one person that could keep her sane and anchored to reality right now.
They collapsed onto the bed, their sobs fading to sniffles after a time, still holding each other tight. As sleep was about to claim her, Blake spared a thought for how lucky she was to have Yang right now, feeling her partner's warmth all around her. Her heart sank as she realized that Weiss was alone in that sterile hospital room, probably more alone than she'd ever been.
For the first time in her life, she offered a prayer to whatever deity might be listening to watch over Weiss. Gods knew she needed it more than anyone right now.
After an almost 9 month hiatus, the depressing story is finally back! It took a bit longer to get back in the swing of things but I'll be uploading probably once a month for the near future!
This chapter was pretty hard to write, both emotionally for me and trying to portray the overwhelming emotions of learning your sister is gone. The rest of this Arc is going to be told from Weiss' perspective but I really felt this chapter needed to be told from Blake's perspective.
While I was on hiatus, I wrote two wholesome whiterose stories: "When I met you in the summer" and "When souls collide" you can find those on my profile if that's something that interests you!
If you liked this chapter, reviews and favorites are always appreciated! As always, a special thanks to my Wife, V, for being my medical consultant and beta reader, and thanks to YOU for reading!