Chapter 124: Of Songs And Toads

"Did everyone see that Grubbly-Plank woman?' asked Ginny, as we went bouncily asking towards the castle. What's she doing back here? Hagrid can't have left, can he?"

"I'll be quite glad if he has," said Luna, "he isn't a very good teacher, is he?'

"Yes, he is!" said Harry, Ginny, and I angrily.

Harry and I glared at Hermione. She cleared her throat and quickly said, '"Erm ... yes ... he's very good."

"Well, we in Ravenclaw think he's a bit of a joke," said Luna, unfazed.

"You've got a rubbish sense of humour then," I snapped at her. Best mate to my sister or not, she was getting on my nerves with that comment.

Luna did not seem phased by my rudeness however. On the contrary, she simply watched me for a while as though I were a cinema.

Rattling and swaying, the carriages moved in convoy up the road. I turned to Hermione, feeling a bit cross with her.

" 'He's very good?' That's all you can say?" I scoffed.

"Don't do that Ron, you know I love Hagrid." said Hermione. "But you also know that he can be a bit dangerous with his lessons. Remember last year?"

"Of course I remember, but we shouldn't let her feel like we doubt him. We are supposed to stand up for him, no matter what. He would do the same for us."

"You're right, sorry. It's just, Luna kinda irks me in a way. She seems nice, but...odd."

"Ginny says she is her best mate, so she may not be so bad," I said, trying to attempt to find something nice to say about her, as she was nice enough to get Pig for me. "and Ginny is usually spot on with people."

Hermione shrugged. I knew she probably didn't have anything nice to say about the girl, but she more than likely would try.

When we got to the school, Harry seemed lost in his seat. "Are you coming or what?" I said.

"Oh ... yeah," said Harry quickly and we joined the crowd hurrying up the stone steps into the castle.

The Great Hall looked its usual splendidness with its candles floating in midair all along the tables, with students filing in and meeting .with each other, discussing this and that.

Luna drifted away from us at the Ravenclaw table. The moment we reached Gryffindor's, Ginny was hailed by some fellow fourth-years and left to sit with them. Harry, Hermione, Neville, and found seats together about halfway down the table between Nearly Headless Nick, the Gryffindor house ghost, and Parvati and Lavender, who gave Harry overly-friendly greetings. It seemed that a lot of people were either giving Harry looks and whispering, or giving forced hellos.

"He's not there." said harry, as we scanned the staff table.

"He can't have left," I said anxiously.

"Of course he hasn't," said Harry firmly.

"You don't think he's ... hurt, or anything, do you?" said Hermione uneasily.

"No," said Harry at once.

"But where is he, then?"

There was a pause, then Harry said very quietly, so that Neville, Parvati and Lavender could not hear, "Maybe he's not back yet. You know-from his mission-the thing he was doing over the summer for Dumbledore."

"Yeah ... yeah, that'll be it," I said, feeling reassured, but Hermione bit her lip, looking up and down the staff table as though hoping for some conclusive explanation of Hagrid's absence.

"Who's that?" she said sharply, pointing towards the middle of the staff table.

We looked over at Dumbledore, whose head was inclined towards a woman sitting next to him, who was talking into his ear. She looked squat, with short, curly, mouse-brown hair in which she had placed a horrible pink band that matched the fluffy pink cardigan she wore over her robes. She had a face like Trevor's, only his was more appealing

"It's that Umbridge woman!" exclaimed Harry.

"Who?" said Hermione.

"She was at my hearing, she works for Fudge!"

"Nice cardigan," I smirked. My old dress robes looked better than that shit in my eyes.

"She works for Fudge!" Hermione repeated, frowning. "What on earth is she doing here, then?"

"Dunno ..."

Hermione scanned the staff table, her eyes narrowed.

"No," she muttered, "no, surely not ..."

I was about to ask what was she going on about, when the doors from the Entrance Hall opened. A long line of scared-looking first-years entered, led by Professor McGonagall, who was carrying a stool on which sat an ancient wizard's hat, heavily patched and darned with a wide rip near the frayed brim.

The buzz of talk in the Great Hall faded away. The first-years lined up in front of the staff table facing the rest of the students, and Professor McGonagall placed the stool carefully in front of them, then stood back.

The first-years' faces glowed palely in the candlelight. A small boy right in the middle of the row looked as though he was trembling. It was the same boy I had coaxed off the train.

The whole school waited with bated breath. Then the rip near the hat's brim opened wide like a mouth and the Sorting Hat burst into song:

In times of old when I was new

And Hogwarts barely started

The founders of our noble school

Thought never to be parted:

United by a common goal,

They had the selfsame yearning,

To make the world's best magic school

And pass along their learning.

'Together we will build and teach!'

The four good friends decided

And never did they dream that they

Might someday be divided,

For were there such friends anywhere

As Slytherin and Gryffindor?

Unless it was the second pair

Of Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw?

So how could it have gone so wrong?

How could such friendships fail?

Why, I was there and so can tell

The whole sad, sorry tale.

Said Slytherin, 'We'll teach just those

Whose ancestry is purest.'

Said Ravenclaw, 'We'll teach those whose

Intelligence is surest. '

Said Gryffindor, 'We'll teach all those

With brave deeds to their name, '

Said Hufflepuff, 'I'll teach the lot,

And treat them just the same. '

These differences caused little strife

When first they came to light,

For each of the four founders had

A house in which they might

Take only those they wanted, so,

For instance, Slytherin

Took only pure-blood wizards

Of great cunning, just like him,

And only those of sharpest mind

Were taught by Ravenclaw

While the bravest and the boldest

Went to daring Gryffindor.

Good Hufflepuff, she took the rest,

And taught them all she knew,

Thus the houses and their founders

Retained friendships firm and true.

So Hogwarts worked in harmony

For several happy years,

But then discord crept among us

Feeding on our faults and fears.

The houses that, like pillars four,

Had once held up our school,

Now turned upon each other and,

Divided, sought to rule.

And for a while it seemed the school

Must meet an early end,

What with duelling and with fighting

And the clash of friend on friend

And at last there came c morning

When old Slytherin departed

And though the fighting then died out

He left us quite downhearted.

And never since the founders four

Were whittled down to three

Have the houses been united

As they once were meant to be.

And now the Sorting Hat is here

And you all know the score:

I sort you into houses

Because that is what I'm for,

But this year I'll go further,

Listen closely to my song:

Though condemned I am to split you

Still I worry that it's wrong,

Though I must fulfil my duty

And must quarter every year

Still I wonder whether Sorting

May not bring the end I fear.

Oh, know the perils, read the signs,

The warning history shows,

For our Hogwarts is in danger

From external, deadly foes

And we must unite inside her

Or we'll crumble from within

I have told you, I have warned you ...

Let the Sorting now begin.

The Hat became motionless once more. The applause wasn't as deafening as it used to be when he would. There were weak claps, along with whispers and murmurs. All across the Great Hall students were exchanging remarks with their neighbors.

"Branched out a bit this year, hasn't it?" I said with eyebrows raised.

"Too right it has," said Harry.

"I wonder if it's ever given warnings before?" said Hermione, sounding slightly anxious.

"Yes, indeed," said Nearly Headless Nick knowledgeably, leaning across Neville towards her. "The Hat feels itself honour-bound to give the school due warning whenever it feels-"

But Professor McGonagall, who was waiting to read out the list of first-years' names, was giving the whispering students the sort of look that scorches. Nearly Headless Nick placed a see-through finger to his lips and sat primly upright again as the muttering came to an abrupt end. With a last frowning look that swept the lour house tables, Professor McGonagall lowered her eyes to her long piece of parchment and called out the first name.

"Abercrombie, Euan."

The terrified-looking boy from earlier stumbled forwards and put the Hat on his head; it was only prevented from falling right down to his shoulders by his very prominent ears. The Hat considered for a moment, then the rip near the brim opened again and shouted:

"Gryffindor!"

I clapped loudly with the rest of Gryffindor house as Euan Abercrombie staggered to our table and sat down, looking as it he wanted to disappear. I caught his eye and gave him a thumbs up. It seemed to had perked him up a bit.

Slowly, the long line of first-years thinned. By the time she got to the M's I was starting to get extremely hungry, my stomach growling.. Finally, 'Zeller, Rose' was Sorted into Hufflepuff, and Professor McGonagall picked up the Hat and stool and marched them away as Professor Dumbledore rose to his feet.

"To our newcomers,' said Dumbledore in a ringing voice, his arms stretched wide and a beaming smile on his lips, "welcome! To our old hands-welcome back! There is a time for speech-making, but this is not it. Tuck in!"

There was an appreciative laugh and an outbreak of applause as Dumbledore sat down neatly and threw his long beard over his shoulder so as to keep it out of the way of his plate-for food had appeared out of nowhere, so that the five long tables were groaning under joints and pies and dishes of vegetables, bread and sauces and flagons of pumpkin juice.

'Excellent," I said as I took a loving look at the food before seizing the nearest plate of chops and piling them onto my plate.

"What were you saying before the Sorting?" Hermione asked the ghost. "About the Hat giving warnings?"

"Oh, yes," said Nick. "Yes, I have heard the Hat give several warnings before, always at times when it detects periods of great danger for the school. And always, of course, its advice is the same: stand together, be strong from within."

"Ow kunnit nofe skusin danger ifzat?" I said with a mouthful of food.

"I beg your pardon?" said Nearly Headless Nick politely, while Hermione looked revolted. I gave an enormous swallow and said, "How can it know if the school's in danger if it's a Hat?"

"I have no idea," said Nearly Headless Nick. "Of course, it lives in Dumbledore's office, so I daresay it picks things up there."

"And it wants all the houses to be friends?" said Harry, looking over at the Slytherin table. "Fat chance."

"Well, now, you shouldn't take that attitude," said Nick reprovingly. "Peaceful co-operation, that's the key. We ghosts, though we belong to separate houses, maintain links of friendship. In spite of the competitiveness between Gryffindor and Slytherin, I would never dream of seeking an argument with the Bloody Baron."

"Only because you're terrified of him," I laughed.

Nearly Headless Nick looked highly affronted.

"Terrified? I hope I, Sir Nicholas de Mimsy-Porpington, have never been guilty of cowardice in my life! The noble blood that runs in my veins-"

"What blood?" I asked. "Surely you haven't still got-?"

"It's a figure of speech!" said Nearly Headless Nick, annoyed. "I assume I am still allowed to enjoy the use of whichever words I like, even if the pleasures of eating and drinking are denied me! But I am quite used to students poking fun at my death, I assure you!"

"Nick, he wasn't really laughing at you!" said Hermione, throwing a furious look at me.

Unfortunately, my mouth was so full of food again, all I could manage was "Node iddum eentup sechew," which Nick did not seem to think constituted an adequate apology. Rising into the air, he straightened his feathered hat and swept away from us to the other end of the table, coming to rest between Colin and Dennis.

"Well done, Ron," snapped Hermione.

"What? I'm not allowed to ask a simple question?"

"Oh, forget it," said Hermione irritably, seeming not to want to talk to me anymore. Which I didn't care because I knew it would just turn into a row.

When all the students had finished eating and the noise level in the Hall was starting to creep upwards again, Dumbledore got to his feet once more. Talking ceased immediately as all turned to face the Headmaster. I was ready for him to dismiss us. My bed was calling my name.

"Well, now that we are all digesting another magnificent feast, I beg a few moments of your attention for the usual start-of-term notices," said Dumbledore. "First-years ought to know that the Forest in the grounds is out-of-bounds to students-and a few of our older students ought to know by now, too (Harry, Hermione, and I exchanged smirks)."

'Mr. Filch, the caretaker, has asked me, for what he tells me is the four-hundred-and-sixty-second time, to remind you all that magic is not permitted in corridors between classes, nor are a number of other things, all of which can be checked on the extensive list now fastened to Mr. Filch's office door.

"We have had two changes in staffing this year. We are very pleased to welcome back Professor Grubbly-Plank, who will be taking Care of Magical Creatures lessons; we are also delighted to introduce Professor Umbridge, our new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher."

There was a round of polite but fairly unenthusiastic applause, during which the three of us exchanged slightly panicked looks; Dumbledore had not said for how long Grubbly-Plank would be teaching.

Dumbledore continued, "Tryouts for the house Quidditch teams will take place on the-"

He broke off, looking over at Professor Umbridge. As she was not much taller standing than sitting, there was a moment when nobody understood why Dumbledore had stopped talking, but then Professor Umbridge cleared her throat, "Hem, hem," and it became clear that she had got to her feet and was intending to make a speech.

Dumbledore only looked taken aback for a moment, then he sat down and looked alertly at Professor Umbridge as though he desired nothing better than to listen to her talk. Other members of staff were not as enthused at wanting to hear. Professor Sprout's eyebrows had disappeared into her flyaway hair and Professor McGonagall's mouth was as thin as I had ever seen it. No new teacher had ever interrupted Dumbledore before. Many of the students were smirking; this woman obviously did not know how things were done at Hogwarts.

"Thank you, Headmaster," Professor Umbridge said, "for those kind words of welcome."

Her voice was high-pitched, almost childlike, and extremely annoying. I felt a rush of dislike wash over me, and I felt that I loathed everything about her, from her stupid voice to her fluffy pink cardigan. She gave another little throat-clearing cough ('hem, hem') and continued.

"Well, it is lovely to be back at Hogwarts, I must say!" She smiled, revealing very pointed teeth. "And to see such happy little faces looking up at me!"

A quick glance shown that no one had a happy little face. If anything, we all shared the same look of being offended by being talked to like toddlers.

"I am very much looking forward to getting to know you all and I'm sure we'll be very good friends!"

"Not likely," I heard my brothers mumble.

"I'll be her friend as long as I don't have to borrow that cardigan," Parvati whispered to Lavender, and both of them lapsed into silent giggles.

Professor Umbridge cleared her throat again ('hem, hem'), but when she continued, some of the breathiness had vanished from her voice. She sounded much more businesslike and now her words sounded dull and monotone, like she had practiced them in the mirror.

"The Ministry of Magic has always considered the education of young witches and wizards to be of vital importance. The rare gifts with which you were born may come to nothing if not nurtured and honed by careful instruction. The ancient skills unique to the wizarding community must be passed down the generations lest we lose them for ever. The treasure trove of magical knowledge amassed by our ancestors must be guarded, replenished and polished by those who have been called to the noble profession of teaching."

Professor Umbridge paused here and made a little bow to her fellow staff members, none of whom bowed back to her. Professor McGonagall's dark eyebrows had contracted so that she looked positively hawk like, and she exchange a significant glance with Professor Sprout as Umbridge gave another little 'hem, hem' and went on with her speech.

"Every headmaster and headmistress of Hogwarts has brought something new to the weighty task of governing this historic school, and that is as it should be, for without progress there will be stagnation and decay. There again, progress for progress's sake must be discouraged, for our tried and tested traditions often require no tinkering. A balance, then, between old and new, between permanence and change, between tradition and innovation ..."

I tuned her out and looked around. Apparently I wasn't the not paying attention. The Luna girl had pulled out her magazine again, and Dean looked as if he could fall asleep at any moment. Hermione seemed to be drinking in every word Umbridge spoke, though, judging by her expression, they were not at all to her taste.

".. because some changes will be for the better, while others will come, in the fullness of time, to be recognised as errors of judgement. Meanwhile, some old habits will be retained, and rightly so, whereas others, outmoded and outworn, must be abandoned. Let us move forward, then, into a new era of openness, effectiveness and accountability, intent on preserving what ought to be preserved, perfecting what needs to be perfected, and pruning wherever we find practices that ought to be prohibited."

Finally, she sat down. Dumbledore clapped. The staff followed his lead, though I noticed that several of them brought their hands together only once or twice before stopping. A few students joined in, but most had been taken unawares by the end of the speech, not having listened to more than a few words of it, and before they could start applauding properly, Dumbledore had stood up again.

"Thank you very much, Professor Umbridge, that was most illuminating," he said, bowing to her. "Now, as I was saying, Quidditch tryouts will be held ..."

"Yes, it certainly was illuminating," said Hermione in a low voice.

"You didn't enjoy that shit, I'm sure." I said quietly, turning a glazed face towards Hermione. "That was about the dullest speech I've ever heard, and I grew up with Percy."

"I said illuminating, not enjoyable," said Hermione. "It explained a lot."

"Did it?" said Harry in surprise. "Sounded like a load of waffle to me."

*There was some important stuff hidden in the waffle," said Hermione grimly.

"Was there?"

"How about: 'progress for progress's sake must be discouraged'? How about: 'pruning wherever we find practices that ought to be prohibited'?"

"Well, what does that mean?" I said impatiently.

"I'll tell you what it means," said Hermione through gritted teeth. "It means the Ministry's interfering at Hogwarts."

There was a great clattering and banging all around us; Dumbledore had obviously just dismissed the school, because everyone was standing up ready to leave the Hall. Hermione jumped up, looking flustered.

"Ron, we're supposed to show the first-years where to go!"

"Oh yeah," I said, having forgotten. "Hey-hey, you lot! Midgets!"

"Ron!"

"Well, they are, they're titchy ..."

"I know, but you can't call them midgets!-First-years!" Hermione called commandingly along the table. "This way, please!"

A group of new students walked shyly up the gap between the Gryffindor and Hufflepuff tables, all of them trying hard not to lead the group. They did indeed seem very small. A blond boy next to Euan Abercrombie looked petrified; he nudged Euan and whispered something in his ear. Euan Abercrombie looked equally frightened and stole a horrified look at Harry.

"See you later," Harry said dully to us and he made his way out of the Great Hall alone.

As Hermione led the firsties on ahead, I hung behind, so that none would be left. The boy Euan from earlier was trailing back some, still looking afraid. I sorta felt bad for the little bloke, and decided to talk to him.

"Name's Ron Weasley." I said. "You remember me from the train, right?"

"Y-yeah." stuttered Euan. "Our prefect."

"Yeah, along with Hermione Granger up there. What's up? You said you were fine when we got off the train."

Euan looked uneasy at the question. "Well this other guy with a badge like you, only it's green, someone told him that I was a Muggleborn, and he said that my kind really didn't belong here, and that I would struggle."

"He's a fucking git. Ignore him. You see Hermione? She's a Muggleborn too, and she's brilliant. She's the best in our year.

Euan smiled for a few seconds. "Then that boy there told me about Harry Potter. Saying he was a nutter, and to stay away from him."

I had to stop myself from grabbing that kid and throwing him over the steps. How dare he speak on my best mate like that!

"Don't listen to that git." I said. "I'm Harry's best mate, and he's no butter. He's telling the truth."

"So that evil wizard is back?" asked Euan, looking g even more fearful. "I heard of him. My brother's a Ravenclaw sixth year, and he told me all about him."

"Yes, he is, but you're in the safest place in the entire world." I reassured him. "Dumbledore will have you right."

Euan looked like he felt a little better after that.

After we got the firsties in the common room, and Hermione explained rules, we sent them off to bed. I, very much exhausted, gave a quick goodbye to Hermione and headed up to my dorm, where I heard arguing coming from it.

"I'll talk to you how I want!" I heard Harry shout at someone. "If you've got a problem sharing a dormitory with me, go and ask McGonagall if you can be moved ... stop your mummy worrying-"

"Leave me mother out of this, Potter!" I seen Seamus yell as I stepped into the room.

"What's going on?" I said.

Harry was kneeling on his bed with his wand pointing at Seamus, who was standing there with his fists raised.

"He's having a go at me mother!" Seamus yelled.

"What?" I said surprised. "Harry wouldn't do that-we met your mother, we liked her."

"That's before she started believing every word the stinking Daily Prophet writes about me!" said Harry at the top of his voice.

"Oh,...right." I said, now understanding the anger.

"You know what?" said Seamus heatedly, casting Harry a venomous look. "He's right, I don't want to share a dormitory with him any more, he's mad."

"That's out of order, Seamus," I said in a voice of warning.

"Out of order, am I?" shouted Seamus. "You believe all the rubbish he's come out with about You-Know-Who, do you, you reckon he's telling the truth?"

"Yeah, I do!" I snapped at him.

"Then you're mad, too," said Seamus in disgust.

"Yeah? Well, unfortunately for you, pal, I'm also a prefect! So unless you want detention, watch your mouth!" I said, jabbing him hard in the chest with my finger

Seamus looked like he had some cheeky shit to say, but with a noise of contempt he turned on his heel, vaulted into bed and pulled the hangings shut with such violence that they were ripped from the bed and fell in a dusty pile to the floor. I glared at Seamus, then looked at Dean and Neville.

"Anyone else's parents got a problem with Harry?" I said aggressively.

"My parents are Muggles, mate," said Dean, shrugging. "They don't know nothin about no deaths at Hogwarts, because I'm not stupid enough to tell them."

"You don't know my mother, she'd weasel anything out of anyone!" Seamus snapped at him. "Anyway, your parents don't get the Daily don't know our Headmaster's been sacked from the Wizengamot and the International Confederation of Wizards because he's losing his marbles!"

"Stuff it, Seamus." I warned.

"My gran says that's rubbish," piped up Neville. "She says it's the Daily Prophet that's going downhill, not Dumbledore. She's cancelled our subscription. We believe Harry."

He climbed into bed and pulled the covers up to his chin, looking over at Seamus with no fear. "My grans always said You-Know-Who would come back one day. She says if Dumbledore says he's back, he's back."

Harry looked gratefully at Neville and nodded. Nobody else said anything. Seamus got out his wand, repaired the bed hangings and vanished behind them. Dean got into bed, rolled over and fell silent. Neville, who appeared to have nothing more to say either, was gazing fondly at his moonlit cactus.

Harry looked as if he was done with everything, so I didn't say anything to him. He climbed into bed, and turned his back towards me, probably attempting to fake as if he was going to sleep immediately.

I went and put my pajamas on, then climbed into bed, excited to be back at Hogwarts and at the same time, trying to shake off the feeling of something bad happening.