A/N: RAAAGGGHH!

The title of this chapter perfectly describes my feelings towards it. This chapter's material was sourced from a substantial burst of inspiration. That burst of inspiration was meant for a full-length or possibly extra-long chapter, but thanks to certain failings on my part I was unable to complete it in time. I have disappointed my inspiration, the source of everything I do that is good, the force I trust my life to.

I cannot abide this failure. I can do better. I must do better.

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Obito

Darnit! I forgot the most important thing!

Obito sighed. "What's wrong?" Clone Yahiko asked. They were making sandwiches together: both peanut butter and jelly, but with different kinds of jelly.

"I forgot to tell Konan something very important. The vampire who's been training the dolls needs to know it."

"What is it?"

"I used the Sharingan when you came back yesterday," Obito said quietly. "I saw your feelings. You're afraid for the dolls. The more trained they are, the more people might want to use them as weapons. That's why you haven't trained them until recently, isn't it?"

Yahiko didn't reply immediately. Obito wondered if he was upset about having his privacy invaded. But when Yahiko finally spoke, his thoughts were revealed to be very different. "I never thought about that before. I knew I was worried about them, and I knew that I didn't want them to be as controlled as other people did, but I never drew a connection between those two things before. You're right, though. As long as they ran wild, they were free. They had their power all to themselves. They could do whatever they wanted. They could run around, crash the skateboard, draw on walls: you know, little kid stuff." He looked down at his sandwich sadly. "I'm worried. Will anyone allow them to do those things ever again?"

"I think so," Obito said. "I don't think anyone who lives here, even Kakuzu or Kisame, would see the dolls going off someplace or doing something weird and start giving them commands just to make them stop. I don't think the people here are like that at all."

Yahiko mustered a smile. "You're right. Kisame is the one who most wanted them under control, and even he can be sentimental. He insisted on bringing Solis to life, didn't he?"

"Tell me that story again."

"Oh, it was the cutest thing! Before the dolls had names, we gathered them together in the sunroom…"

Yahiko knew nothing but joy and love when he told this story. As he told it, he sighed and drooped and flopped his arms about as if he was close to melting from the cuteness. That only made Obito feel more guilty. I should have remembered! I don't want to delay telling the vampire about his worries. Something makes me think that the longer she goes without being told, the more likely his fears are to come true.

Yahiko's melty mood lasted for only a few seconds after the conclusion of the story. Then he grew grim. "From the very beginning, Warlic has always cared about the others. They know that and respect him for it. Soye's been using those feelings to punish them. Yesterday, she and I worked out a compromise that I didn't like. Fortunately we didn't have to put it into practice, but they won't always be so attentive. I need to figure out a method of discipline that doesn't involve using their best, most noble selves against them."

Obito shuddered. "What has she been doing?"

"Locking Warlic in a cage whenever any of the dolls lose focus or misbehave."

Obito winced. Taking someone prisoner in order to extort their family and friends: wasn't that something ruthless tyrannical dictators did? It was probably against the Geneva conventions! No wonder Yahiko looked so grim. "What was the compromise?"

"To use a different doll each time," Yahiko muttered, sullen.

Obito was horrified. Was that the lowest level of torture the vampire was willing to agree to? She must be a very cruel person! "That's horrible."

"I don't understand it," Yahiko said. "She's just like Konan. But Konan wouldn't do something like this."

Because Konan understands how you feel. She's been friends with a version of you since childhood. She would never hurt you like this. These thoughts came to Obito's mind immediately, as if they had been waiting for their chance. His determination flared. Words flew out of his mouth before he even knew they were there. "I'll talk to her."

Yahiko blinked, startled. "You don't need to. I will."

"No," Obito said, surprising himself. "No, if that was the best compromise she would agree to, then that shows that she doesn't care about your feelings. She doesn't think hurting you will have any consequences. She needs to know she's wrong. She needs to know that if you hurt one person, you also hurt anyone who ever cared about them, and those others won't stand for it. I don't know what she's doing to stop the dolls from breaking Warlic out, but she can't do it to human people!"

Yahiko looked impressed, scared, or possibly both. "You don't have to keep proving yourself after the trial. When I completed mine, that was it - Konan was totally satisfied. I didn't have to keep tackling life-threatening danger to maintain her good opinion of me, and neither do you."

Obito's train of brave thoughts stopped so suddenly that it nearly jumped the tracks. Was that his true motive? Was he acting reckless just to impress people? The certainty that he had felt only seconds before vanished. What am I doing? His fight with the vampire lady is his own. He never asked for my help. I shouldn't intrude. A heavy feeling quashed his appetite. Thinking like that felt like a return to an all too familiar habit. Obito's heart began to pound, his instincts warning him that he was in danger, but he was too unpracticed to understand their message. Huh? Why do I feel so bad all of a sudden?

Yahiko stood tall. In a stronger voice, he said, "But you're right. I can't settle for that pathetic compromise. I need to show her that I'm not just whining. I need to back up my words with action. Thank you for helping me see that!"

Hearing that made Obito feel better. But he shouldn't have felt better. Better was exactly the wrong thing to feel. Obito opened his mouth to say something supportive, but darkness swallowed his vision before he could say a word.

Madara

Madara seized Yahiko's wrist, squeezing the bones together painfully. Yahiko, caught by surprise, ineffectually tried to pull away. When that failed, he realized what was happening. "Ow! Madara?"

Madara threw Yahiko's hand back in his face. "Hypocrite," he snarled.

Yahiko rubbed his sore wrist. "What?! Uh, I mean… What? How?"

"'I need to back up my words with action,'" Madara quoted. He went on, his voice growing more and more hostile with every word. "But you don't need to keep proving yourself. Go on, rest on your laurels. Stagnate."

Yahiko glared back. "That wasn't what I said. I said that he didn't need to let anyone else's opinion decide his actions."

"You said he was letting other people's opinions decide his actions," Madara growled.

Yahiko's eyes began to soften. "Are you saying…that he wasn't?"

Madara stepped forward, getting right up in his face. "You are no better than every bigot that ever walked this earth. You accuse others of the sins that you yourself commit. Rather than face your flaws, you enforce them on people that you claim to care for, people who made the mistake of trusting you."

Yahiko backed away, looking like his gut had been carved open by Hidan's scythe. He struggled to speak. "I - I didn't… I just wanted to protect him from making the mistakes I've made."

"Assume that another is just like you, undermine and reject all opposing evidence, then congratulate yourself for doing the right thing. The classic hypocrite's tactic."

Yahiko met Madara's gaze. His mouth firmed. "Turn your criticism on yourself. Not everybody thinks in tactics and schemes like you do. Maybe I'm different from you. Maybe I made an honest mistake." He leaned against the countertop and sighed. "Thank you for pointing it out. Now please let Obito come back so I can apologize."

Madara would normally have rejected this argument and pressed his attack. He normally would have wanted to break Yahiko's spirit so thoroughly that the optimist would be turned into a crying wreckage of a person. Normally, the slightest sin would be met with utter destruction.

But recently, Zetsu had reminded him of something important. Only lunatics acted without reason. Madara was increasingly being seen as a lunatic, and therefore losing relevance. He needed to reconnect with the reasons for his actions in order to prove that he had any. He'd done a lot of thinking about those reasons and, well…

Perhaps Yahiko had a point.

I am not my own blind spot. I am in control of myself. I know who I am and what I am doing. I am a guardian. I am one of three, and the other two are vulnerable. My motive is to protect them. I have already accomplished that goal. I don't need to do anything more. So Madara did not press his attack. He did not attempt to shatter Yahiko's spirit. In a heroic effort of self-restraint, he stepped back.

Obito

Being sent deep into the core of his own mind did wonders to help Obito connect with his instincts. He didn't realize what had happened; he was too busy experiencing the wonder of epiphany. "Yahiko," he said. "I think I am trying to prove something, but not to anyone else. To myself. The trial wasn't enough. Konan might be satisfied, but I'm not. I'm the one who asked for it, so I'm the one who decides if I pass or fail. And I haven't decided that yet."

Yahiko smiled sadly. "You need to back up your words with actions just as much as I do."

Obito nodded.

"I'm sorry," Yahiko said, bowing his head. "I spent so long trying to please other people. I assumed the same was true of you. I leaped to conclusions."

Obito didn't know how to respond. Nobody had ever apologized to him before. Not for a genuine mistake that they would need to apologize for if they'd done the same thing to anyone else. He was used to apologies that served only as tools to lessen whatever harm someone had unwittingly inflicted upon his poor, fragile self. But Yahiko kept his head bowed. He was waiting for Obito to forgive him.

What I say matters, and I can choose what I say. Have both those things ever been true at the same time before? I feel so powerful. Obito straightened up and swallowed to clear his throat. "It's alright. That was part of it. You had to give me an opportunity to back down and be weak. I had to refuse."

Yahiko raised his head. "A new trial? One that you're designing yourself?"

"I…I suppose so."

Yahiko grinned. "What can I do to help?"

Obito's heart beat faster, but not from fear. He's so kind! How did someone like me catch the attention of someone like him? "Well… With the vampire lady…"

"We could confront her together."

Obito thought about it. Would she even notice me? Listen to me? That could be a good thing; I'd have to work extra hard to make myself heard. But do I really want to challenge myself that much? "I think I'd rather talk to her myself. I… I nearly didn't pass just now. I was going to give in and let you do everything." He tried to remember what last-minute burst of strength had inspired him to resist. He said he was going to face her himself. I said… What? What did I say? Not that I was never trying to prove myself to Konan; I had that epiphany later. What did I say? …How much time passed before I had that epiphany?

"Yeah, maybe it would be better to face her yourself," Yahiko muttered. "You can't take the risk of Madara emerging in the middle of vampire territory."

Obito blinked in confusion. Those two sentences appeared to be entirely unrelated. "...What?"

Yahiko explained, "Madara doesn't trust me. If I'm around, he might appear. So it's safer if you go alone."

Obito finally remembered something that he thought he should have remembered before. "Wait. Didn't the vampires ban me from their territory for being unstable?"

Yahiko's eyes widened in alarm. But as he thought about the matter, he relaxed. "You won't be alone. The demon boy helps with the lessons. He'll probably agree to vouch for you."

"So I have to bring the dolls to their next lesson?"

"I suppose so," Yahiko murmured. "Which will be... Hmm... At the rate our work with Ruta is going, we might not be done with that for a long time. The best time to take them for lessons would be right now."

Of course. How else could it happen? Obito took a deep breath and summoned his courage. "Where are they?"

Yahiko bit into his sandwich and chewed thoughtfully. He chewed more and more slowly, eventually stopping altogether. He shot Obito a worried look. "You know, that's a good question. Samehada and I have been working with or listening to Ruta. Has anyone been watching them?"

On the road

No, no one had.

The four dolls looked down the forest path as far as they could. Solis had been there before, but the others hadn't. They all raised their arms in celebration, then ran forward. Warlic paused briefly to pick up the skateboard and balance it on his head before following.

They didn't get very far before they were rudely interrupted. The strange humanlike thing that was immune to all their magic appeared in the path before them. He announced, "Time for your daily lesson!"

The dolls tried to run away, but he used his own impenetrable magic to pick them up and hold them in the air. They knew they couldn't break free, but fought and flailed with all of their might anyhow. Eventually, one doll after another stopped fighting and hung still. When the others had all calmed down, Warlic continued to struggle on alone. He was not going to give up until he completely exhausted himself.

The demon boy was curious to find out if the dolls could exhaust their magic and what would happen if they did. But this time, sympathy overrode curiosity. He walked up to Warlic and said, "Don't worry. You won't be locked up this time." Warlic stopped struggling. The demon boy smiled at him. "You wanna go to lessons today, trust me! What's gonna happen there is waaaaaay more exciting than walking down some dirt road."

The dolls didn't know how to distrust anyone, so they believed him immediately. When he lowered them to the ground, they followed him back to the main road. Obito and Clone Yahiko waited at the intersection that led down to the suburbs. "All clear!" the demon boy announced before vanishing.

Yahiko crouched down to pat all of the dolls on their heads. Then he said, "Alright, guys. Today, Obito will be the human supervising your lesson. He doesn't know the way, so you'll have to lead him there. Try not to stop too often, okay?"

None of the dolls understood that last sentence. They had a hard enough time wrapping their little heads around the concept of leading a human anywhere. Enticing a human to follow them just a few feet away where something interesting lay hidden was normal, but leading a human all the way to a destination? To a lesson? That was a completely backwards way of doing things. They didn't like it. They looked up at Obito suspiciously.

"Looks like they're ready to go," Yahiko said with a smile. He stood up and nudged Obito's hand. "Be careful with Soye, okay? The vampires can be…scary."

"More scary than Original Nagato?"

Yahiko laughed. "Yeah, you'll probably be okay!" He walked away, then changed his mind and came back. "But seriously, be careful. Keep the Sharingan on if you can. You're good at dodging, right?" Obito assured him that he was. "Okay. You'll be okay." This time, Yahiko walked away quickly so that he would not have time to change his mind.

Obito looked down at the dolls. The dolls looked back. He scratched the back of his head. "Okay, so… Lead the way."

The dolls looked at each other. Who was this person to give such weird instructions? DId they want to obey? They did not.

Obito watched them mill about in confusion. After a little while, he stood straight, cleared his throat and said, "Warlic, Solis, Manta, Little One. Reverse Heel!"

The dolls jumped. They knew that was a command, but what did Reverse Heel mean?

"When you hear the command 'Heel,' you line up behind a person. 'Reverse Heel' means line up, but in front," Obito explained.

The dolls lined up in front of him in the reverse of their usual order. This put Solis at the very front. They stood straight and did not fidget or look around. This time, when Obito commanded them to go to their usual lesson location, they obeyed.

It was difficult to stay focused when they could not see the person who commanded them. Whenever they slowed down or the line started to break up, Obito would call all of their names and command them back into Reverse Heel. The first time this happened, the dolls were very nervous. But the masked human who gave strange commands did not punish them at all for their inattention, so they relaxed. Being ordered back into formation was much better than being imprisoned!

By the time they reached vampire territory, the dolls had a very high opinion of him indeed. The masked human had called out names more than two dozen times. The dolls were very sure now that he would never imprison them. They suspected that humans in general would not, but could not be sure. This one human, at least, they were sure of.

They led him directly to the front porch. An enormous sunshade already hung overhead, and the demon boy himself was waiting for them. He giggled and knocked on the door.

Soye opened the door and stepped out onto the porch. She was dressed in her usual short-sleeved outfit, not covered up in fear of the sun. Her face turned hard as stone when she saw which human accompanied the dolls today. The demon boy giggled again, more maniacally. Without looking, she raised a hand to silence him. Then she said, "Were you not informed of our decision?"

Obito held his hands behind his back and tried not to shiver. "I was. But I had to talk to you."

"I'll vouch for him," the demon boy said. "He would not have come here if he hadn't heard that I would be here."

Soye stepped sideways, putting some distance between herself and the demon boy. She pointed to him and called, "Warlic, Solis, Manta, Little One. Go over there." When the dolls were past, she descended to the front lawn to face Obito.

The demon boy crouched down and whispered, "Told ya there was something good you had to see." The dolls fixed their unblinking eyes on the front yard, not wanting to miss a single second.

Obito could not help shaking as Soye came closer, but he kept his back straight and his head up. "You had to talk to me," Soye repeated, her voice feather-soft, her eyes razor-sharp. They bored directly through the mask's lone eyehole. "On what topic?"

Obito took a deep breath. His shaking arms stilled. "The dolls. You - you've been imprisoning them as punishment."

Soye said nothing.

"You think that it's wrong for them to act like little kids. But it's not. There's a reason why they haven't been trained until now. That was deliberate."

Soye tilted her head.

"The more trained they are, the better weapons they make. Anyone could command them to do anything. Yahiko didn't consciously realize it, but he was training them to be wild and out of control so that nobody would dare try to use them." Obito paused to take another breath. His shoulders relaxed. "You think he's just an incompetent caretaker, but you're wrong. He's doing a wonderful job of looking after these dolls. You need to listen to what he says. He knows what's best for them."

Soye tilted her head the other way. "Training them to go out of control? Interesting way of describing it." She gave serious thought to Obito's words. "How strange. If your friend is as competent as you say he is, he should have been able to explain to me precisely why I ought to use different disciplinary methods. But he could not."

"That's because he knows the right thing to do, but he usually doesn't know why it's right," Obito replied.

"You seem to have a talent for explaining the whys and hows of things. Enlighten me."

"Being out of control is only a short-term defense. They need something stronger in the long run. They need to be able to recognize and refuse manipulation. In order to do that, they need to understand morality." Obito looked past her, at the dolls standing on the porch. "They need to understand what goodness is. They need to be good. That's why Yahiko's been training them to care for others. It's easy for people who are very powerful to think that they can do anything they want and they don't have to care about anyone else's feelings, so he's been working hard from the very start to make sure they never develop that attitude." He looked back at Soye. "You're using their caring feelings to hurt them. You're teaching them to blindly obey anyone who gives orders even if their senses of morality tell them that person isn't to be trusted. If you keep using their love for each other to control them, the best-case scenario is that they learn to obey anyone who knows the right technique. The worst-case scenario is that they stop caring for each other or anyone else and become little sociopaths. Then they'll be infinitely more dangerous than they ever were when they ran around playing children's games."

Soye leaned back. Just a little, but enough for everyone to see that she was impressed. She looked at Obito in a new way. "A well-reasoned concern," she murmured. "I shall consider it."

The dolls looked at each other. They didn't understand everything Obito had said, but they understood that he was fighting the vampire lady to make her stop locking up Warlic. Warlic raised his arms. The others raised their arms too. Little One hugged Warlic, causing the others to dogpile on. The four dolls hug-wrestled back and forth all over the porch.

Soye turned around in time to see this. Obito did not have to say a word. She simply watched, and as she watched, rethought her priorities.

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A/N: I made a mistake. I must fix that mistake. I think I already know how. See the beginning author note on next week's chapter for an explanation.

EDIT: Mistake fixed! The scene where Obito and Yahiko agree on what needs to be done has been rewritten to be more direct and a scene where Obito confronts Soye has been added! The chapter is finally finished. Huzzah!