radio star

xviii. interference

Sakura fidgeted as she observed the large, brightly lit, white-painted office in which she sat. It was cavernous in size, and in Sakura's opinion, it was made even more intimidating in the almost austere modernity of its decor.

Today had been a strange day. In the middle of fielding questions about last night and this morning over coffee with Tomoyo—who had proclaimed that this totally meant Syaoran Li was in love with her, or at the very least had strong romantic feelings for her—Sakura had received a call from Syaoran himself with an odd request.

"Hm? What is it?" Sakura asked, eyes slightly wide with curiosity. She peeked through the window into the café, where Tomoyo caught her glance and gave her a thumbs-up. Sakura resisted the urge to laugh.

"Well... It sounds a lot scarier than it is. But my manager, Meiling, wants to meet you."

Sakura's brows knit together in confusion. "Me? But why?"

Syaoran sighed. "She knows we're friends. She hasn't really minded up till now because we've been careful. But I—she just wants to meet you to clear up PR concerns."

"Syaoran, I—"

"I'm really sorry about this, Sakura," he said, suddenly sounding so agitated that it shocked her. "I've never—I've never wanted my career to interfere with your life or make you feel like you're an outsider or someone I shouldn't associate with. She's just very protective of me... Family, you know."

"No, not at all," Sakura said, although she did, in fact, feel a bit like she was someone with whom he shouldn't associate. While having to meet his manager did not help quell that feeling, it certainly had not caused it. "Don't worry," she said soothingly, hoping to calm some of his distress. "It was my career that interfered with your life, silly."

She heard him let out a soft breath, and she wondered what expression he wore now. "When did she want to meet?" she asked.

"Tonight, if you're free. I know it's short notice..."

"No, tonight should be fine."

"Will you just be at home? Meiling will send a car."

"Yeah."

"Okay. Thanks for doing this, Sakura. I won't be there—I've got work, and even if I didn't, she wouldn't let me, anyway," he said, an irritated edge to his voice. "But I told her to be nice."

Sakura giggled. "Okay. I appreciate that."

"I'll talk to you later."

"Right. Bye, Syaoran."

A woman with ruby red eyes and sleek black hair tied up into a bun, save for a few ringlets that fell gracefully around her ears and at the nape of her neck, stepped into the office. "Hi, Miss Kinomoto, I'm Meiling Li, Syaoran's manager and PR agent," she said, striding over to shake hands with Sakura.

In her fitted white powersuit and black heels, she looked quite at home in this room, Sakura thought, although that was befitting. It was her office, after all.

"Hi, I'm Sakura—although, I guess you already know me," Sakura said, laughing nervously. "Um, it's nice to meet you."

"Yes, it's a pleasure," Meiling responded with a smile, although it did not touch her eyes. "Would you like any tea or coffee?"

"No, thank you."

Meiling nodded and sat down on the seat across from Sakura. "First of all, I want to thank you for coming to meet me here on such short notice. I know you must have been surprised."

Sakura nodded slowly, a small smile on her face. "A bit."

"So, the reason I called you here today, Miss Kinomoto, is because I wanted to talk with you a bit about Syaoran."

"Oh, okay—yeah, sure," Sakura nodded, trying not to toy with her hands.

"I am aware that you were working for a tabloid magazine as a photographer and writer, and that you and Syaoran had a deal to take photographs of him." Meiling met Sakura's eyes. "I'm sure you'd understand that as his PR agent and given his recent history with the media, I've been really wary of this situation."

Sakura nodded again, and she suddenly found herself wishing she'd asked for some tea so she'd at least have something to look at or do with her hands.

"Could I ask you something?" Meiling said, ruby eyes glinting in the light. They really were a very peculiar color, Sakura thought. They reminded her of Tomoyo's eyes, which were also an unusual shade.

"Sure."

"What made you start doing this?"

Sakura raised her eyebrows. "Doing—following Syaoran around?"

"Yes."

"Well, the work required it," Sakura said a bit sheepishly, not knowing how else to answer.

"No, I meant—well, why did you start working with a tabloid? Was that always your preferred career choice? Syaoran tells me you'd like to go into journalism."

Sakura wondered how much Syaoran had told Meiling, surprised that he had even mentioned this much about her. "He's right." She chose a spot on the blank white walls behind Meiling's head and fixated on it as she began to speak. "I never wanted to be a paparazzo. I don't know anything about celebrities, and I think it's a terrible invasion of privacy to follow them around with a camera all day. I understand why it's done, but I never saw myself being the one to do it."

Meiling raised a brow. "And yet, you did."

"I did," Sakura conceded. "At the time I took the job, I had a lot of financial obligations to meet. It wasn't something I was proud to do, but my boss was very kind to me from the start, and I was coming out of a waitressing job that hadn't given me much to work with."

Meiling pursed her lips and nodded, mulling this over, before she asked, "And did you find that you were able to meet your financial obligations through your work, if you don't mind my asking?"

"I was," Sakura answered truthfully.

"Then why did you quit?"

"Oh—well, I..." Sakura paused. For some reason, she hadn't been expecting this question. Perhaps it was that she hadn't expected Syaoran to tell Meiling anything about her at all, and it turned out that he had essentially told her everything. What was she to say?

"Miss Kinomoto?"

"I'm sorry," Sakura said, shaking her head. On a whim, she decided to go with the same response she'd given Syaoran. "I quit because I wanted to get involved in real journalism, and I knew I wasn't getting any closer to my goals through this job, no matter how comfortable it was. My boss had told me early on that he could help me get a start in magazines after I was done working there, but..." Sakura shook her head. "I didn't think I could last a whole year like he asked."

"Why not?"

"It's not a line of work with which I'm very comfortable," Sakura admitted. She didn't explain that much of that was because she felt like her world could not mix with Syaoran's any further than it already had.

"I see," Meiling responded. "But you still plan on seeing Syaoran?"

Sakura looked up at the ceiling, which was paneled with glossy white tile. What did Meiling want her to say? Perhaps the best answer was just the truth. It was all she had, after all. "Well... I hadn't expected to. I brought it up to him and told him that I'd understand if he didn't have time to see me anymore, but, um..."

Meiling leaned in, extremely curious now. Syaoran had not exactly elaborated to her upon how they had decided to continue being friends. She realized it should have surprised her that Sakura had not been the one to request that they continue their friendship, but for some reason, it didn't surprise her at all.

"He told me he wanted me around," Sakura finished softly.

"Is that all he said?"

"Something like that," Sakura said. She thought about all of the other factors that led her to wonder exactly how Syaoran felt about her—how casually he had let go of the business aspect of their relationship; the very fact that he had stayed over with her twice now; and perhaps most importantly, the numerous instances in which they had exchanged no words but he had looked at her in a way she could never forget. That exquisitely vulnerable, tender burning in his eyes was an image that had been irreversibly branded in her mind.

But Sakura was reluctant to bring any of this up, partly because she felt out of place explaining such intimate moments to a stranger—even if Meiling did know Syaoran extremely well—and also because she did not want to overstate his affection for her. If all of this was just in her head and Syaoran considered them just friends and nothing more, she didn't want to say anything out loud that would indicate that she had thought otherwise.

Meiling leaned forward, elbows resting on crossed knees. "Miss Kinomoto, I'm going to be very honest with you. Syaoran is not the type to get attached to people very easily."

Sakura nodded, nervous as to what she'd hear next.

"It's a survival tactic, you see—something borne early in his life out of necessity. He is involved in an industry that is so vicious and cutthroat that to place one's trust in another essentially means risking the possibility of that person turning around and divulging all of one's secrets to the media. In this industry, almost anyone would do anything to get ahead, to make more money, to become more famous or more powerful. Do you understand this?"

"Yes," Sakura responded quietly. She knew all of this, of course. And if she hadn't been aware of it before, spending these last few months around Syaoran and her place of work had certainly taught her firsthand. She felt a distinct sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach, like dread was tangibly forming and trying to punch holes through her insides to get out. She understood now. Meiling was essentially telling her that she had no business being around Syaoran, and worse, it seemed that she was confirming that Syaoran did, in fact, only think of her as a friend.

"As I said before, as his agent and manager, I definitely don't want to see him hanging around paparazzo, let alone befriending one. And as his cousin—well, you're aware of what happened to him a few months ago, I'm sure."

Sakura nodded, unable to formulate any kind of articulate response. The sense of dread began to punch harder at her stomach, and she was certain that if she tried to speak, her voice would shake.

"Right. So, as his cousin, I feel protective of him, and from that angle, I'm also not keen on him being close with a paparazzo, either. So overall, this—his 'wanting you around'—is not something I am very happy about. I don't think you're a bad person by any means, but I'll be frank. I am very much inclined to distrust you."

Sakura stared down at her hands, unable to meet Meiling's eyes, but she nodded and mumbled an "I see." She felt blood rush rapidly to her head, and she wondered why she was having such a severe reaction to this news. She had felt perfectly content with her life before she had ever met or even known of Syaoran Li. And even just this morning, she had been able to brace herself for the possibility that he wouldn't want to see her again. So why was it that now, just a few hours later, the thought of no longer seeing him panicked her so much?

Before, it had been his choice, she thought. She had left the ball in his court, and he had delivered his decision to her quickly and confidently. She recalled how his eyes, serious and blazing amber, had met hers as he had told her with not even a hint of a question in his voice, "I want to keep seeing you... If that's all right with you." For him to tell her this so certainly and then to have it taken away from her was much more difficult than never having had a confirmation from him at all.

Meiling let out a long sigh, and Sakura finally glanced up at her, only to see that her features had softened on a suddenly weary face. Meiling looked at back at her, and much to Sakura's surprise, she smiled kindly, lips curving up as her lower lids rose to slightly crinkle her eyes.

"However, Miss Kinomoto, I've been thinking about this long and hard, and I've come to the conclusion that a lot of what I just said doesn't really matter."

Sakura felt herself lean back a bit in surprise. "It doesn't?"

Meiling shook her head. "No, it doesn't. I'll get to why in a moment, but first, may I ask you something?"

Sakura nodded.

"If I were to tell you that I could offer you a sum of money that would ensure you'd never have issues meeting your financial obligations again—in fact, you'd be quite comfortable for a very long time—so long as you stay away from Syaoran, what would you say?"

Sakura raised her eyebrows in alarm. "Excuse me?"

"Just answer the question for me, please."

Sakura swallowed, wondering if this was all real. It sounded purely hypothetical, but she still wanted to provide an answer true to her feelings. "Well... I—I could never take the money," she began, eyes trained absently on a spot on the white leather sofa on which Meiling sat. "But if you insisted that I needed to stay away for his well-being, I'd ask that I could at least say goodbye to him. I'd... I'd want to tell him to take care of himself, and..." She trailed off.

If that were the case, she thought, maybe then she'd tell him how she felt. I'd let him know that no matter what he does and what the world thinks of him, I'd still...

Before Sakura could finish her thought, Meiling pressed, "You wouldn't take the money?"

"No," Sakura answered, her voice soft but resolute. "I'd refuse. It wouldn't be right."

Meiling watched her for a moment, one perfectly arched brow raised, and suddenly, she shook her head and laughed. "I hope you don't find me terribly cliché for having asked that."

Sakura raised her eyebrows bemusedly. "Excuse me?"

"Sorry, I'm sorry. I'd never try to buy any of Syaoran's friends off, so I hope I didn't insult you. It was a hypothetical question. I was just really curious as to what you'd say."

"Oh," Sakura answered, her confusion only growing. She hoped what she had said had been enough.

"Miss Kinomoto," Meiling said, eyes kind, "I face a constant dilemma in my work. As Syaoran's agent and manager, I want to do everything that is best for his career and image. But as his cousin, I want to do everything in my power to make him happy and to keep him safe. It goes without saying that those desires clash. Now is one of those times.

"But here's why much of what I told you earlier doesn't matter: Syaoran is no idiot, and after everything he's been through, somehow, he has come to trust you, and to a most profound degree. I don't know how much he's expressed it or tried to express it to you, but he values you very much. And while I trust his judgment for the most part, this was too risky a situation for me not to assess it myself." She smoothed her pencil skirt as she took a breath. "But I can see now why he chooses to be around you. I think you give him a sense of peace and normalcy that he's craved since he was very young. And acting not even as his agent or his family, but just as someone who really cares for his happiness, I could never take that away from him. It is vital to him."

Sakura recalled the night almost two months ago when Syaoran had come to her after having received an email from Mizuki, what he'd told her the next morning before he had left her apartment. "You make me feel like a real person."

The churning in her stomach had not quite stopped, but she felt a rush of something very pleasant suddenly flooding her system, abating the dread that had been gnawing and thrashing at her insides. She suspected that part of it was relief. "I... I don't know what to say," Sakura admitted, a nervous laugh bubbling up in her throat.

Meiling laughed. "I guess there isn't a lot to say, honestly. I called you here, Miss Kinomoto, because I wanted to see what kind of person you are. If upon meeting you, I thought it necessary to cut Syaoran off from you, I would have. I can usually tell when someone is after something. I'm rarely blindsided, you know. But..." She shook her head. "You just don't seem like the type." She smiled. "You seem like you wouldn't hurt a fly, let alone Syaoran."

Sakura smiled back tentatively. "Well, thank you, I think." She paused. "Does this... Does this change anything?"

Meiling sighed, leaning back into her seat and tapping one finger against her knee. "Not exactly. You're welcome to still see him as long as you both are careful. Initially, I told Syaoran that the moment this goes to the tabloids, he could never see you again... But I don't think that's an option anymore, because I am one hundred percent certain that he would refuse that condition now, and he'd probably do anything to defy it."

Sakura drew in a breath and held it. She wondered once more if she was imagining the significance that she appeared to have in Syaoran's life, which, if Meiling was right, was far more than she had imagined. "You think this would go to the tabloids?"

Meiling's expression grew somber. "I should issue you the same warning I gave Syaoran. You've been fortunate enough to catch him in rare situations where he's not being followed, but I'm sure you've also seen firsthand how many people do follow him around on a day-to-day basis. If you're not careful—and maybe even if you are—they can catch you, too. And if you're photographed by the media, they'll begin to wonder who you are. They'll go to ridiculous measures to figure it out, and once they do, he won't be the only one caught in the crossfire. The spotlight will be on you, too, Miss Kinomoto, and I don't think it'll be in a manner that you'll enjoy."

She looked Sakura dead in the eyes. "I'll give you my honest opinion and tell you that I think it is highly likely that eventually, the media could catch onto your friendship with Syaoran. You seem like a good person, and honestly, too innocent to be around this industry—so I do worry about you in that respect. But Syaoran has known all of this, and I presume that you've known as well. Since all the parties involved have accepted such a risk here, we'll just have to prepare to face the battle if it ever comes to us."

Sakura stared at Meiling's grave expression and saw that she was entirely serious. She had never expected this, but the more she thought about it, the more she realized how naïve she had been. It had been easier when she'd had business reasons to see him, but unless they kept meeting at her nondescript apartment, the likelihood of the media catching on suddenly seemed very high. She swallowed what felt like a painful lump in her throat, but she nodded. "I understand."

Meiling nodded back. "Good, I'm glad you do. Miss Kinomoto, much as I hate to say it, you have my support." She smiled and extended a hand.

Sakura smiled back and shook it. "Thank you, Miss Li."

"Call me Meiling."

"Then, please, call me Sakura! I'm really happy I got to meet you," Sakura responded sincerely. Despite the whirlwind of emotions the conversation had put her through, she felt a great relief, as though she had just passed a very difficult exam.

"Me, too," Meiling said, smiling. She picked a business card off of the holder on the glass coffee table between them and handed it to Sakura. "My number is on here, if you ever need anything. And Syaoran's driver, Wei, should be waiting outside, and he can take you home."

Sakura took the card, which was crisp and white with glossy black letters raised along the surface—simple and elegant, like its owner. "Thank you."

Meiling shook her head. "Thank you," she said, her eyes soft. "Really."

Syaoran heard his doorbell ring just as he stepped out of the shower. "One minute," he called out, although he knew that the person on the other side of the door—likely Meiling—could not hear him.

Quickly toweling off, he threw on his clothes and walked down the hallway towards the door, rubbing a towel through his hair. He took a quick glance at a panel beside the door, where a video screen showed him that Meiling stood outside, waiting.

"You were waiting so patiently that I thought it might be someone else," Syaoran said as he opened the door for her, raising a brow. "Makes me think something's up."

"Shut up," Meiling muttered, stepping her way inside and throwing her bag unceremoniously on the chaise in the foyer.

"Ah, now you seem more like yourself," Syaoran said with a grin. "How'd it go?" He led her into the kitchen, where he pulled out a pitcher and filled two glasses with water before handing her one.

"It was... It was good," Meiling said, her own surprise evident in the way she emphasized the last word. She held the glass to her lips and took a sip. "It went really well."

"What exactly is your definition of 'really well'?" Syaoran asked warily. He sat at the small breakfast table in the corner of the kitchen, and Meiling followed suit, although she leaned back tiredly.

"She's a good girl, Syaoran. You should keep seeing her."

Syaoran nearly spit out his own water. "Did I hear that correctly? It was that easy?"

"You did," Meiling said, eyes closing. She sighed. "I hate this whole damn situation, but I hate fighting you more. And I don't have the will to fight you over it anymore, either, because I can see why you like her so much and I don't have the heart to take it away from you."

Syaoran looked down at the table, trying to hide the smile that was slowly forming on his lips. "What exactly did she do to persuade you?"

Meiling laughed dryly. "That's the funny part. She didn't do anything. She answered my questions, and that was it."

"Really? That's all?"

"Well... I asked her, hypothetically, what she would say if I offered to pay her off to never see you again."

"You what? Meiling, what the hell—"

"Oh, calm down. You know I'd never mean something like that. I wanted to know what she'd say. I already kind of liked her before I asked her, but I just had to make sure."

Syaoran pursed his lips. "Well, what did she say?"

Meiling finally sat up, meeting Syaoran's eyes. "She said she couldn't take any money, but if she absolutely had to stay away from you, she'd want to be able to say goodbye first." Meiling smiled a small smile as she remembered Sakura's expression, her eyes trained up toward the ceiling as she carefully thought out her answer, which had been so purely honest that it had left not even a shadow of a doubt in Meiling's mind of the sincerity of her character. "She said she'd want to be able to see you one last time."

Syaoran bit back a smile, but Meiling knew him well enough to catch the slight lighting up of his eyes, the way his eyebrows rose briefly, barely. "So that sold you, huh?"

"It did," Meiling conceded, nodding once. "If you're going to put your ass on the line, you should at least do it for someone who believes in you. So, loverboy, you can keep seeing her. But be careful. I've already resigned myself to this becoming a headache later on, but at least give me some time to figure out in advance how to manage it before you go and get caught, okay?"

Syaoran nodded, trying to quell the light feeling rising up in his chest. "Thanks, Meiling. I really appreciate it."

"Yeah, yeah. Now, let's get back to business. The Bunka Gakuen Ball is in two weeks. We've got some serious planning to do on how to answer questions on the red carpet, because I won't be on your arm the whole night."

"What? Aren't you going?" Syaoran asked confusedly.

"I am," Meiling answered, and then she grinned. "As Eriol's date."

Syaoran stared for a long moment before roaring with laughter.

Meiling smiled wryly. "I know. I'd tell you not to laugh, but when he asked me, I laughed, too. He said he just needed someone who wouldn't stir up any questions."

"Smart of him," Syaoran muttered, still recovering from his bout of laughter.

Meiling nodded as she pulled out her laptop and opened up a document. "I know."

"Well, good for you. You deserve a night off."

"Are you stupid? You know I'll be keeping an eye on you the whole night regardless."

Syaoran grinned. "Well, I'll behave myself to make it a little easier for you."

"Thanks." Meiling took a sip out of her glass before continuing. "So, you're... You're going alone," she murmured to herself, reading her file aloud. She looked up at him. "You're sure?"

Syaoran shrugged. "It's the easiest thing to do. If I brought anyone, and I mean anyone, besides you, you know the media would go crazy."

"Might stir up some good publicity," Meiling said casually.

Syaoran shot her an exasperated look. "Don't start."

"You're right, you're right," Meiling responded, typing. "Prepare for some ridiculous articles about you being alone for the rest of your life or whatever, though. Mizuki will be there, too, so that's not going to help."

"Mizuki will be there?"

Meiling nodded. "She wasn't originally on the list, but I guess they got word that she'd returned early from Thailand, so they put her on it last minute. As of yesterday, she's attending. I know you said it's too much effort to act like you two are friends, but at the very least, try not to start anything."

Syaoran sighed. Somewhere in the last forty-eight hours, he'd all but forgotten about Mizuki—a blessing and a curse. But now, memories of their meeting a couple of days prior flooded his brain.

"You okay?" Meiling asked, peering over her screen at Syaoran's face. He looked quite different from how he had moments ago when they had discussed her meeting with Sakura. He stared down at a spot on the table, eyes slightly narrowed and unfocused, a slight frown set on his lips.

"You know... Mizuki told me something a few days ago when she saw me." His voice was oddly detached, and he continued to stare at the spot on the table.

"What was it?" Meiling furrowed her brow. "You told me you guys had a fight..."

"We did. She told me she still loved me."

Meiling's eyes bulged. "What?"

Syaoran was silent.

"Is that why you've been in such a funk for the last couple of days? Oh, my God, Syaoran, why didn't you tell me?"

"I don't know. I was tired and confused," he muttered before laughing mirthlessly. "I'm still tired and confused."

Meiling shook her head. "What nerve. What led her to tell you that? After leaving you and then not speaking to you for three months?"

He shrugged. "I guess she got lonely and nostalgic."

"What did you tell her?"

"What do you think?" He looked at her, finally, and Meiling felt the protective part of her stirring when she saw his eyes. "I told her it was too late..."

"But you're not sure," she finished softly.

He shook his head. "I don't really know if I'll ever be sure. It really sucked, making her cry. I hated myself for it." He sighed. "But then there's Sakura—God, I don't know."

Meiling reached out and placed a hand on his arm, relieved that he didn't flinch away. "One thing at a time, then. We'll figure it out."

He smiled wryly. "You're not going to tell me it'll all be okay?"

Meiling snorted. "I know you hate that kind of talk. But it'll all work out for the best in the end. That much, I believe."

"I appreciate that."

"Of course. Now, let's go over some of these interview questions..."

Sakura heard her phone ringing and reached over on her nightstand blindly before picking it up. "Hello," she mumbled.

"Were you asleep?"

She blearily opened one eye to darkness as she recognized Syaoran's voice. "No," she lied.

He chuckled. "Sorry for waking you."

"No, it's okay," she said, pulling herself up and switching on her lamp. She squinted against the light and saw that it was just past midnight. "What's going on?"

"I wanted to thank you for meeting Meiling today," he said. "She really liked you, you know."

"Did she? That's good," Sakura said, smiling. "I couldn't really tell..."

"Yeah, Meiling's got a pretty mean poker face. But she liked you, don't worry." He paused. "I can let you go back to bed—"

"It's all right," Sakura responded. "I'm up. I liked meeting her, too."

"Hm. That's good. I know she can be intimidating."

"No, she was very nice. What are you doing?" Sakura leaned back against her headboard, closing her eyes and relishing the feeling of listening to the low, pleasant timbre of Syaoran's voice.

"Just working on some music. Writing and editing, mostly."

"You were working all day today, weren't you? Aren't you tired?"

"Only a little," he said, and his words sounded slightly garbled. Sakura envisioned him holding the cap of a pen between his teeth as he scratched out a line in his notepad. "I do my best writing at night, though. Any leads on your job search? I know between meeting with Meiling and all today, you probably didn't get much time."

"I sent out a few applications today, so hopefully, I'll hear back from some places soon."

"Good," Syaoran said. "Keep me posted."

"I will," Sakura smiled. She liked the sound of that—keeping him posted. As though he were invested in the happenings in her life.

"Sakura."

"Hm?"

"I know Meiling told you earlier today that things could get pretty nasty with the media if they ever catch onto your friendship with me... And that she thinks it could really happen at some point." He sounded oddly muted, and Sakura realized that the pleasant tone in his voice had suddenly disappeared, replaced now by quiet concern. "I just wanted you to know... There's no pressure. If the thought of that is too much for you, I'd understand."

"What, like... Like not seeing you anymore?"

Syaoran waited a moment before answering. "Yeah."

Sakura had indeed pondered this all evening after her meeting with Meiling. Although it only seemed reasonable for both of them to cut off this relationship, Sakura couldn't bring herself to for some reason. Her mind had kept wandering back to that unfinished thought she'd had in Meiling's office.

No matter what you do or what the world thinks of you, Syaoran...

"Don't be silly," Sakura heard herself say. "Like you said, we're good friends, right? Anyway, what are the odds? I'm a nobody. If they ever photograph you with me, they'll probably think I'm just another fan trying to get an autograph."

"I can't imagine you asking me for an autograph."

"Yeah, I'm not really sure what I'd do with it," Sakura giggled.

"And after all this time, you still know how to bruise an ego." He chuckled. "Well, okay. If you're sure." He paused. "It's pretty late... I'll let you go back to bed now. Thanks for picking up."

"Of course! You go to bed, too. Don't work yourself too hard."

He waited another moment before speaking again. "Hey, Sakura."

"Yeah?"

"You remember earlier today, you told me that your career interfered with my life?" His voice was low, with all the hushed urgency of a secret and an undercurrent of sweetness that had Sakura inexplicably holding her breath.

"Yes?"

"You know, I would never say that you interfered with my life in any way. But—if I had to call it an interference... Well, I just wanted to say that I've never been so grateful for an interference, ever."

Sakura felt her eyes widen, and whatever words she tried to force out of herself would not come. A feeling she recognized as something akin to joy exploded inside of her in little pinpricks, like miniature fireworks, all over her body, creating a sort of ache in their potency.

"Anyway, I just wanted to tell you that," he said softly, and Sakura could hear the smile in his voice. "Good night, Sakura. Sweet dreams."

He hung up before she could respond, and Sakura fell back onto her sheets dazedly, her phone clutched to her chest against her racing heart.

"Tomoyo, you look beautiful," Sakura breathed, watching Tomoyo turn slowly at various angles in the three-way mirror to check for any faults.

"Aw, thanks, Sakura," Tomoyo smiled. The smile quickly turned into a pout. "I wish you were coming with me. I really could have gotten you that extra ticket, you know."

Sakura snorted. She turned onto her back on the love seat upon which she lay. "You know I can't. I don't belong in that kind of scene. What would I do there?"

"Mingle with celebrities while wearing a ball gown! And drink delicious, expensive champagne while wearing a ball gown," Tomoyo insisted. "And dance with Syaoran all night. While wearing a ball gown."

Sakura laughed. "That all sounds wonderful, but I'd feel so uncomfortable and out of place. And if anyone caught Syaoran with me, they really would wonder who I am and what I was doing there, and there'd be all sorts of trouble. Remember what I told you Meiling told me? We're trying to avoid that."

Today was the day of the Bunka Gakuen Ball, and Tomoyo had asked Sakura to come over and help her get ready. As Sakura had sat in the studio in Tomoyo's home and watched her friend put on her dress and helped her with her hair and makeup, Sakura had refused Tomoyo's requests to come to the ball with her about five times now.

"If I've been telling you 'no' for the last two weeks, what makes you think I'll say yes on the day of?" Sakura had asked exasperatedly.

While Syaoran's schedule had been so jam-packed that she had not had a chance to see him face-to-face since the morning after he'd spent the night, he had called her nearly every day, even if just for a few minutes, to talk a little bit and then say good night. Sakura somehow found this even more exhilarating than seeing him, perhaps because the casual, everyday tone of their daily conversations hinted at an intimacy that had not existed between them before. Upon learning of these latest developments, Tomoyo had begun to petition for Sakura to come to the ball with her so she could witness their interaction for herself, but Sakura had declined repeatedly, remembering Meiling's words of warning. Between that, her inclination to feel extremely uncomfortable at such an event, and Syaoran's mentioning that Mizuki Akizawa would also be in attendance, Sakura really had no desire to go at all.

"And anyway, I've got my new job coming up in a couple of days, and I just want to go ahead and start preparing," Sakura added, a smile on her face. She was surprised at how quickly people had called her back for interviews and not just one, but the two offers she'd received. Ultimately, she had chosen a desk job as a secretary for a corporate consulting firm—hardly her preferred career choice—but it would pay the bills for the time being, and she planned on writing freelance articles to build her résumé in the meantime. More than anything, she was relieved to have a plan, and finally one that seemed as though it might set her on the right track.

"Oh, fine," Tomoyo said, frowning. She looked at the clock. "Ah, I've got to run, anyway. My boss said we'd meet at the office and we could all ride to the ball together! They rented out limousines for us."

"How exciting! Be sure to take lots of pictures for me," Sakura giggled. "But not so many that you look like a tourist."

Tomoyo smiled. "Will do."

Eriol breathed a sigh of relief as he headed into the crowded ballroom, where the party had not quite yet started—guests stood around sipping champagne and picking at hors d'oeuvres while music played quietly over the speakers. He turned to Meiling, who stood tall and radiant beside him in a straight, simple fitted white strapless gown with thin black piping, her hair up in a loose bun.

"Well, we're finally off the red carpet," he grinned. "Thanks for being my wingman."

"Wing woman," Meiling corrected, and she grinned back, rouge lips curving up. "You're quite welcome. Thanks for the dress."

"My pleasure. You look beautiful, by the way."

"Eriol, stop," Meiling laughed. "That is too weird coming from you."

Eriol shrugged. "I give compliments where they're due. Can I get you a glass of champagne?"

"Sure. I'll be around. I'm gonna try to find Syaoran."

Eriol nodded and headed towards the refreshments, hands shoved in his pockets. He truly hated this part of his job, the schmoozing and the forced grandeur of events such as these. They were fun for some, he supposed, but often, he was only thinking about work, and it didn't help that he attended these events alone or strictly with a friend.

He stopped in his tracks when he saw a familiar face standing beside the table of champagne glasses, looking around pleasantly as she stood alone, sipping on a glass herself. It was funny—he'd only seen her once, but he felt he could recognize those eyes and that strange shade of hair anywhere.

Maybe tonight would be more interesting than he had expected.

Syaoran squinted ever so slightly as the flashbulbs went off, and he knew that he would have a difficult time seeing anything when he got off the red carpet for a good few minutes. He slightly regretted his decision to attend alone, wishing he'd at least asked one of the employees from Meiling's office. He was familiar enough with them, and even if the press ran with it, they eventually would have dropped it after seeing that it was nothing. He couldn't wait to get inside; he suspected Meiling and Eriol had arrived a bit earlier than he had and were already in the building.

As he made his way down the carpet, fielding photographers and TV reporters who all had the same questions for him—what are you wearing tonight, why didn't you come with a date, tell us a bit about your new album, are you aware Mizuki Akizawa is in attendance this evening?—he threw on a perfect smile and posed and gave out the same diplomatic, vague answers that he and Meiling had gone over in the last few weeks. I'm wearing a Tom Ford suit and Dior Homme shoes, I'm just here to have a good time tonight with friends so I didn't think a date was necessary, the album is almost done and I'm putting the finishing touches on it now, and yes, I am aware that Mizuki is here, but I haven't seen her.

It went on and on, and he felt himself growing weary by the end of it, already wishing that he could head home. He couldn't even indulge himself in the nervous habit he had of running a hand through his hair, as it had been gelled and styled out of its usual unruly mane into a cleaner look to match the suit.

He kept one hand in the pocket of his pants, where his phone rested in his palm, cool and quiet. He knew that Sakura would not text him, not when he was at this big event, because she didn't want to bother him—but he wished more than anything that she would call so he'd have an excuse to duck somewhere quiet and just have a normal conversation, so he could hear the light amusement in her voice and the charm of her words.

But he finally felt relief as he neared the end of the carpet and began to head up the steps into the museum. He looked out at the masses of photographers and reporters, still smiling his red carpet smile and waving to cameras, smirking to himself a bit as he thought about how proud Meiling would be—and then he stopped, frozen, just before the entrance, grand and surrounded by towering columns.

The photographers suddenly grew frenzied, cameras clicking incessantly and reporters shouting a thousand questions all at once, creating what could only be described as a dull roar. But Syaoran could not hear or see any of it, because before him stood Mizuki Akizawa in a beautiful, powder blue ball gown, turned halfway to gape at him with wide green eyes, poised midway inside the building at the top of the stairs like something out of a fairy tale.

Sakura curled up in her bed with her book, Kero at her feet, and she set it down just for a moment to stare out of her window. Today's weather had been chillier than before, as fall was finally starting to settle in, and she smiled to see that the sky was remarkably clear for Tokyo. She thought about Tomoyo and Syaoran at the same event, and she hoped that both of them were having a good time. She giggled at the thought of them meeting again. Syaoran would have to play it very cool, she thought.

Even as she was beginning to get her life back on track, thoughts of him had become more and more predominant in her mind, sending shots of giddiness through her each time she envisioned his eyes or heard his voice in her head. In these last two weeks, something had truly changed, and she knew she had passed a point of no return. It had been a long time coming, she thought, but now that the feeling had finally hit her, she was surprised at how powerful it was, pleasant and painful and sharp all at the same time.

I love you, Syaoran Li. And no matter what you do or what the world thinks of you, I'd still love you.

That's the end of chapter eighteen! I know it's quite a cliffhanger, but the good news is that I have a lot of plans for the next chapter and I can't wait to write it, which means it will probably be written and up relatively soon!

Thank you, as always, for the reviews from the last chapter. Even though a lot didn't happen, you were all very sweet and so responsive! I loved hearing what you liked most about the chapter, whether it was a detail or a favorite moment (those are always my favorite kinds of reviews!). It made me feel very good about a chapter in which I originally didn't have too much confidence, haha.

Speaking of which, I also apologize for the quality of this chapter. All summer, I've really been very nitpicky about my own writing, and so it's been hard to finish a scene with satisfaction. Still, I hope you guys enjoy it. I know it's a ton of dialogue, but it gets things going, and a lot happens here, and even more happens in the next few chapters! Buckle up, because things are really about to get insane. The ball is just the beginning.

And to the many of you who asked and guessed for Sakura to go to the ball, I am sorry ;-; I wanted her to go, too, so she could wear a pretty dress and knock Syaoran off of his feet, but the media frenzy that would inevitably ensue would completely derail the way the plot's supposed to go, unfortunately. Still, Syaoran clearly doesn't need Sakura there to think about her, anyway ;D So now, Sakura has fully come to terms with the fact that she is in love with Syaoran. I know we all knew this from like, chapter five or something, but it took her a little longer, haha. Now, we just need Syaoran to do the same! But we've really gotta get him to work out those age-old Mizuki feelings, don't we?

Also, can we please have a moment of silence for how good Syaoran (or any guy, really) would look in a Tom Ford suit?

And as a last note, thank you to those of you who read and reviewed my latest one-shot, "A Good Day." The reviews are all so very lovely, and I have every intention of responding to each of them! If you haven't read it already and you want a quick, happy read, please give it a shot!

I think that's all, sorry for the suuuper long author's note this time around T-T Guess I just felt talkative! Please leave a review, and thank you so much for reading!

Love,

boreum dal