"Aaron, do you think that we could talk for a few minutes before we get ready for work?" Penelope asked as she sat back against the headboard and brought her knees up to her chest, resting her chin on them. He turned from the closet to look at her, not quite quick enough to mask the frustration on his face, and she felt her lower lip tremble a little. Ever since the funeral, ever since Erin had decided to show up and pay her respects, things had been a little rocky between them, but she hadn't wanted to admit that she was walking on eggshells around him, because she was just so tired of losing so much in the last year, and she didn't want him to be the next thing she lost. Not when she loved him so much.

He must have seen the sadness in her expression, as he hung the shirt in his hand back on the rod before closing the distance between them and taking a seat near her feet, reaching his hand out to cover her knee. "What's on your mind, honey?"

"I feel like I'm adrift without Emily, and that all of you are able to just put those feelings in a box and move on with your lives. Am I doing something wrong?"

Aaron shook his head as he leaned in and pressed his lips against her forehead in a sweet kiss. "I think that it's perfectly natural for you to be so torn up over her loss for longer than we are. Part of the training we get in the Academy is how to deal with the loss of a partner, of a fellow agent, and so it does seem like we're better at getting past the feelings of deep loss. That's only because we have the training to move forward and do our grieving in private."

"Do you grieve?"

She had no idea where that question came from, and she could tell that he was upset that she had asked it, but now that it was out in the open, she couldn't call the words back. "Of course I grieve, just in a way that isn't as flashy and over the top as yours is."

She flinched at his words, finding that they cut straight to her heart, and she fought to control her reactions, since it seemed they were both spoiling for a fight that morning, and that would be a horrible way to start out their week. Instead, she just nodded in response, knowing that if she were to say anything in that moment, she might burst into tears. They sat silently for a few moments before Aaron kissed her forehead once more, getting to his feet and going back to the closet, picking out his suit for the day before disappearing into the shower.

Thankfully, she had taken her shower the previous evening, after they had made love, so she was able to slip out of bed and chose from one of the outfits that she kept at his place, hurriedly dressing before applying a light layer of makeup and heading downstairs. Jessica was already there, making breakfast, and she gave the woman a wan smile as she took a seat at the table and reached for the coffee, taking a long drink. "You look exhausted, Penny."

"I haven't slept well, not since we found out about Emily. I had thought that things would get better as the days wear on, but it just seems to bother me more and more. But you don't want to listen to me get all maudlin this early in the morning. I'll be better once the caffeine hits my system."

Jessica gave her a look that said she didn't quite believe her, but there wasn't time to press the issue, as Aaron joined them moments later, picking up his own mug of coffee and drinking half of it down in one large gulp. "Are you riding with me this morning?"

"No, because you'll probably be sent out into the field, and I should really return home tonight to do laundry and clean a little." She smiled up at him, hoping that her expression was a fair sight happier than what she had been wearing when Jessica had looked at her. He didn't seem to notice anything amiss, and she was grateful for that as they finished up their meal. Still, it was nice to receive a hug from Jessica on her way out the door, and she leaned into the embrace before she went out to her car. The drive into work was peaceful, more so because she didn't have to talk about her feelings with Aaron, since she had the distinct feeling that he wouldn't really want to listen to her anyway.

While she drove, Penelope decided to call JJ, just to see if she was available to talk for a few moments. "Hey, Penny. Is everything okay?"

"I guess. I just wanted to catch up a little, and see how you were doing since Emily's been gone. We don't talk as much as we used to, and I miss hearing your voice."

"I miss your face," JJ replied, and Penelope chuckled softly as she turned onto the next road on her journey. "And I really hate to do this to you, but my day starts a little earlier than yours does, so I have to let you go. Perhaps we could make plans for later on this month?"

"Okay," she replied, hating the way that tears pricked at the corners of her eyes. "Have a great day!"

"I'll try, and you try to do the same, Penny. And don't worry, we will get together soon. It's just so hectic right now."

"I understand," she whispered to the sound of the open line, JJ having hung up before she could reply to her. The rest of the drive in was quiet, and she fought back tears, since she didn't want to have red eyes when she showed up in the bullpen, as that would cause too many tongues to wag. After parking in her spot, Penelope sat in her car and took a series of long, deep, breaths in order to calm her thoughts and heart before she made her way into the building. Thankfully, there was no one that she knew entering at the same time, so she didn't have to worry about anyone asking questions that would throw her off kilter once more.

After she had just gotten settled behind her computer system, Aaron popped his head inside and then handed her a file. "Strauss just dropped this off, and I need you to pull together the presentation as soon as possible."

Penelope nodded as she took the file from his hands, feeling her words freeze in her mouth as she looked at the closed off expression on his face. Instead, she just smiled sweetly at him before turning to her systems and starting to do as asked. It wasn't that hard to put together the power point, and she was glad that the case wasn't that brutal, since she didn't think that she could handle something too over the top that morning. Once she was ready, she downloaded all the pertinent information into the tablets for the team, and then brought the physical file with her to the briefing room, awaiting the arrival of the rest of the team.

Penelope felt like she was coasting through the presentation that morning, but no one seemed to notice that anything was that off, though Rossi did give her a concerned look as he filed out of the room after Aaron, and she tried to give him her usual sunny smile as she waited for them all to leave. It didn't surprise her that Aaron didn't stick around to say goodbye before he left for the airfield, but it still hurt, and Penelope hurried down to the bathroom and locked herself in the closest stall before allowing herself to cry.

"Penelope?"

Her head lifted at the sound of Erin's voice, and she wondered how the woman knew that she was in there. "Yeah?"

"Agent Anderson mentioned that you looked unwell and had disappeared into the bathroom. Do you need any help?"

Penelope slowly stood up, wiping away the tears from her eyes before resting her hand on the door. "That all depends. Are you alone out there?"

"Yes."

She took a deep breath and opened the stall door, seeing Erin standing there with a handkerchief in hand. Before she could even ask, Erin was tenderly patting away the tracks of tears on her cheeks before stepping back and looking at her, waiting for her next move. Penelope felt her lower lip tremble as she closed the distance between them and hugged Erin quickly. "Do you want to come back to my office while the team is in the air?"

"Yes?" Erin patted her back before stepping away from her and exiting the bathroom. Penelope straightened her shoulders before taking a deep breath and following after her friend. Helen gave her a small wave before she disappeared into Erin's inner sanctum, and that small bit of kindness made her heart ease a little. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you."

"I wasn't upset, I was concerned. What's troubling you this morning?"

Penelope plopped down onto the sofa and hugged one of the throw pillows tightly to her chest as she tried to speak without crying once more. "Aaron and I had a fight this morning about grief and missing Emily." A guilty look passed over Erin's face. "What's that look for?"

"I may have been pushing him to do evaluations on the team, since there is concern coming from the Director about how you all are doing, as he doesn't want another Gideon to happen."

She nodded as Erin took a seat next to her. "Do you know that you're the only one that talks to me about Emily? That listens to me about my grief? I know that the others have issues with you, but I wouldn't be half as okay as I am without your friendship." Before she could think about what she was doing, Penelope leaned over and rested her head on Erin's shoulder, listening to the woman sigh a little as she started to stroke Penelope's hair lightly as a comfortable silence fell between them. This was exactly the peace that she had been seeking that morning, and she found herself slowly finding her footing once more as she rested in the moment.