A/N: I decided after a break from the fandom to finish my stories! So comments are appreciated!
Riley fidgeted in her black dress as she could feel her hands fill with sweat. She couldn't believe she was out in the open with Isabella and not have to worry about peering eyes. However, she knew that Lucas was looming around with Allison but they kept their distance.
The funeral had been beautiful, her parents had planned every detail and moment down to the second. Everyone had returned to the Matthews to eat and talk about Josh, and Riley could feel the overwhelming sense that something was going to go wrong. She could see Farkle huddled into a corner as Maya stood in a small circle of Josh's friends. Zay had kept himself busy by helping Cory and Topanaga with the guests. Riley realized she felt exposed, like a sore thumb within a sea of black with a confused child.
"Mama?" Isabella whispered and tugged at Riley's dress.
"Yeah Izzy?" Riley asked.
"Is everybody sad because of Uncle Josh?" Isabella asked.
"Yes," Riley said honestly and Isabella sniffled.
"Why can't he come back?" Isabella asked.
"It's hard to explain sweetie, but mommy told you that Uncle Josh is watching over us?" Riley said as she crouched down to Isabella's height.
"It's not the same," Isabella pouted and her eyes teared up.
"I know," Riley whispered and held the small girl's face in her hands.
Isabella's frown deepened but it slowly stopped when Riley heard footsteps behind her. Riley froze and cursed herself knowing that eventually Lucas would approach her, but she wasn't ready to see the smug look on Allison's face. She slowly turned and let out a sigh of relief when she saw her grandparents with bloodshot eyes.
"Hey there is the Izzybean," Alan Matthews choked trying his best to smile.
"Great Papa," Isabella said and hugged his leg.
Riley watched Alan's eyes light up a bit and could see that the hug healed one of the cracks in his heart. Riley couldn't imagine what they were going through, she couldn't fathom the idea of burying Isabella before her time.
"Riley honey," Amy said and pulled the girl into a tight hug.
Riley let a few tears slide down her face as she took in her grandmother's hug.
"Grandma, I do not know what to even say-"
"Thank you Riley," Amy interrupted.
"What?" Riley questioned as Alan lifted Isabella.
"Thank you, for being there, he wasn't alone, he … he had you, family," Amy cried.
"Of course," Riley whispered.
"I love you, you know that sweetheart?" Amy said.
"Of course," Riley said in shock.
"We don't say it enough, I love you Riley," Amy said and pulled Riley into another hug.
"I love you too," Riley whispered.
"I love you too Great Papa," Isabella said and Alan chuckled softly.
He placed a kiss on the small child's cheek and Riley pulled away. She wiped her tears away from her face and smiled at Isabella.
"Sorry to interrupt,"
Riley seized, she knew that voice, it still sent shivers down her spine. It was warm, smooth, protective and Riley turned to see Lucas alone.
"And you!" Amy said with a smile.
"Um,Lucas gulped.
"Thank you for being there for him as well, and welcome to the family," Amy said as she glanced over to Riley then Isabella.
"Oh of course Mrs. Matthews," Lucas coughed uncomfortably.
"Amy, Lucas, it's Amy," Amy said and pulled him into a hug,
"Amy sweetheart, maybe we should give them a moment," Alan said and placed a grinning Isabella down.
"Of course, and Riley your speech was wonderful, he would have loved it," Amy said and caressed Riley's face.
Riley wanted to pull her grandparents back as they slipped into the crowd away from the small trio. Instinctively Riley caressed the back of her neck and turned to Lucas with a look in her eyes.
"She's right, he would have loved it, I didn't know how much he helped with Isabella," Lucas said with a slight ridginess in his voice.
"Where's the fiancee?" Riley bit back.
"Talking to Farkle," Lucas said and Riley glanced over to see Allison staring at them but talking to Farkle who looked uncomfortable.
"What's a fiancee?" Isabella asked and both realized the small girl had been between them the entire time.
"Oh um," Riley said and looked at Lucas who looked like he regretted even responding.
"Nothing," Lucas lied.
"No it means something, is it like a aunt or cousin? Do I have another uncle? Like Uncle josh?" Isabella asked.
"It means more than a girlfriend, but less than a wife, like a romantic partner," Riley rushed.
"But … but … daddy does that mean you and mommy are not together?" Isabella asked,
"Izzy maybe you should go to mommy's old room and-"
"No!" Isabella stomped.
"Isabella!" Riley scolded.
"Izzy," Lucas began.
"No!" Isabella screamed.
The crowd around them turned to see the small child with tears welled up in her eyes, her small fist balled up and a scowl on her face. The voices hushed to see what was going on and Riley could feel her heartbeat in her ears.
"Boo bear?" Allison called as she walked towards them.
"Isabella stop it, right now, this is not the place nor the time," Riley gritted.
Allison stopped in front of Lucas and reached up to fix an imaginary smudge on his face before placing a perfect smile on her face.
"Is this the … girl?" Allison asked.
"I hate you!" Isabella screamed at Allison.
"Isabella!" Lucas and Riley shouted in unison.
Isabella turned on her heel and pushed through the crowd towards Riley's room with Riley hot on her tail. She tried grabbing the little girl but she slipped through people easily and ran into the old bedroom and Riley grabbed her wrist before the little girl threw herself on the floor.
"Isabella!" Riley scolded.
"Everything is changing" Isabella cried and Riley realized Isabella was in a full blown sob.
"Izzy," Riley softened.
"I want Uncle Joshy, I want my room, I want to go home!" Isabella cried.
"Izzy," Riley repeated,
"Why don't you love us!" Isabella cried.
Riley's face scrunched in confusion when she realized that Isabella was talking past her and turned around to see Lucas with a defeated look.
"I do," Lucas confessed.
"Why do you need a fiancee?" Isabella asked.
"It's very complicated," Lucas confessed.
"No it's not, you and mommy belong together, you and mommy!" Isabella cried.
"Izzy, mommy and daddy … we just don't see each other that way," Riley said.
"You're lying!" Isabella snapped.
"Isabella," Riley scolded.
"No you are, I can't read and stuff but I hear things, I hear how you tell Nana and Maya how you feel, I hear when you cry at night, when you make wishes, I hear it," Isabella said.
Riley's mouth gaped open and she was baffled. She didn't realize that Isabella was such an observer, she chalked it up to the fact that the little girl was in her own world like she had been as a child. However, her words shook Riley to the core.
"Can mommy be your fiancee?" Isabella asked Lucas.
"Izzy," Lucas sighed.
"You love her right?" Isabella pushed.
"Izzy," Riley whispered as Isabella pulled away from Riley and ran towards Lucas who didn't move from the doorway.
"Do you?" Isabella asked.
"Of course," Lucas said and looked at Riley.
"Lucas don't," Riley whispered.
"I love her, I always have, and I always will," He said not taking his eyes off of Riley.
"Lucas," Riley whispered and her voice cracked.
"See mommy!" Isabella said with a smile.
"But," Lucas began and Riley could feel her heart shattered as Isabella's face fell.
"No, don't," Riley begged.
"Riles, we have to," Lucas said.
"Please not today, I do not think I could handle my heart breaking more," Riley said.
"What's going on?" Isabella asked.
Before either adult could respond, Auggie appeared with his curls draping in his face.
"Mom wanted me to check on you," Auggie said with a slight glare at Lucas.
"Augs can you take Izzy?" Riley asked.
"No! No! I need to stay," Isabella cried,
"Izzy please, just give us a moment," Riley begged.
Isabella defeatedly let go of Lucas's pants and grabbed Auggie's hand.
"Daddy?" Isabella whispered.
"Yes princess?" Lucas said and looked away from Riley.
"Please, think about mommy as a fiancee," Isabella said and followed a confused Auggie out the room.
Riley choked out a sob as soon as Isabella was gone and sat on her bed. Her body racked with sobs as Lucas hesitantly moved towards her.
"We were supposed to talk," Lucas began.
"About what? About how you chose Allison and your new baby? How Izzy will be an afterthought, that all my fears are coming true," Riley cried.
"I don't even know why I agreed to have this talk today," Riley cried and wiped her face.
"Riles-"
"Riley, you do not get to call me that," Riley snapped.
"What do you want me to do? Leave Ally and my baby, for you?" Lucas snapped back.
"I … of course not … I just thought," Riley stammered.
"I need to do right by them, if you didn't keep this secret from me, then maybe things would be different but … I can't leave her," Lucas finished.
"So what do we do?" Riley asked.
"I don't know," Lucas said.
He sat down next to her and ran a hand through his hair and then leaned his face in his hands. He was overwhelmed, he was tired, conflicted.
"How about, in a month I send her with Zay and you see her for a day," Riley whispered.
"One day? Without you?" Lucas asked.
"We have responsibilities, she has school, we can't change our lives to fit yours," Riley said and Lucas felt an ache in his chest.
"I guess I'll take it," Lucas said and got up.
"I better get back to Ally," Lucas started.
"Just go," Riley snapped.
"I do love you Riley," Lucas started.
"Don't," Riley begged.
"I wasn't lying, I will always love you, god I fucking love you," Lucas said and sniffled.
"Lucas please," Riley begged.
"It just-"
"Wasn't enough," Riley finished.
"No Riley, that's not it, I-"
"Lucas we better go," Allison interrupted as the blonde appeared with Maya right behind her.
"Ally can you just give us a few minutes," Lucas begged,
"Sorry Huckleberry, I need her," Maya added.
"Lucas," Allison demanded.
"Ok," Lucas said and looked over to Riley.
Lucas followed Allison out the room, and Maya rushed in. She pulled the broken brunette into her arms and allowed her breakdown completely.
"I'm sorry," Maya whispered.
"Don't be, we just weren't meant to be," Riley sobbed.
"I don't believe that," Maya said and ran her fingers through Riley's hair.
"He chose her, he chose that family, I knew it would end this way and I still had hope that maybe … he would choose me," Riley sobbed.
"Hey, I got you kid," Maya said.
"I;m sobbing about Lucas and … i haven't even checked in on you about Josh," Riley said and tried to sit up.
"Shhh Riles, this is a distraction I need, it's better to fix your pieces than my own," Maya said.
"Maya-"
"Riles please," Maya whispered.
Riley nodded and held Maya tight as she cried into her arms. She knew she was going to cry today but she figured it would be about Josh, not losing the love of her life.