CHAPTER THREE
The clash
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Another three hours later, and Jessica comes to wait with us too. Now everyone is impatient, so Blackburn, Jessica, Davis and I decide to go out for lunch and walk around the Camp "to digest" and unwind.
We end up digesting and unwinding near the gym, and Blackburn noticed it too. But I need to ask him something, so while Davis and Jessica walk closer to the sweaty and mostly shirtless team guys, I walk to stand under a shadow with Blackburn.
"So" I ask, seriously, "what did youexactlytell Hayes? About me and what happened".
He squirms, glancing at his sides, but the guys are far away. "He asked about your professional background. Skills and all that. He takes his job very seriously".
I glance at where the guys are, and Jason is shirtless, drinking water, and Jessica is next to him, checking him out. He doesn't seem too focused on his job, no.
"Ok, then. And about Foxtrot, did he ask anything?"
Blackburn sighs. "No. But he has clearance to know, even though if he doesn't know where to look, he'll never find out anything. But his clearance means that if he asks, you know that I have to tell him".
I nod, pouting, then look down. "I know. And I know he wouldn't tell the other guys. I mean, I hope so. But I'd really like to leave all of this behind me. I don't want to be seen as a victim here".
"If he asks, and I tell, I'm sure he wouldn't think such a thing, ok? Just don't worry. And I'll ask him personally to treat you the same. As a favor for what you did to me. To us" he says, tenderly, and holds and presses my hand, to comfort me. He noticed that I was squirming and stressed out.
I see with the corner of my eye that right at that moment Jason passes near us, running, still shirtless, and glances at Eric's hand holding mine. I quickly release my hand from his, but he definitely saw it.
"That's ok, Eric" I tell Blackburn, because he didn't see Jason and felt awkward when I took my hand from his. "And don't worry, I won't tell him or anyone about how we know each other, ok?" I calm him down, and he nods, appreciating. He's a little emotional, probably remembering about that time, but I convince him to go back to the Command Center with me.
I need some air conditioning after seeing Jason shirtless, even though it was from a distance and just for a second. It really made an impact.
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Finally, after what felt like forever, a thinner Reiss enters the Command Center with many papers and an excited face. He found out something. But not much, and he declares that he can only go to a certain point, and that next it's up to "the girls", which are Lisa and I, to figure out the rest. Jerk.
Well, so the marathon begins, and Lisa and I are practically in lock down inside another room next to the Command Center, where some nerds are working too, to, well, figure it out. Every now and then Jessica comes by to help us, and we really appreciate it, even though she doesn't do much, but she annoyingly keeps pointing out that this isn't part of her job description, and that she's helping out and we can pay her back with light beers or granola. The granola part is my idea, and she actually likes it.
I occasionally go outside for a couple of minutes for some vitamin D or to stretch my legs, and during the first night I'm walking to my cabin and come across Clay, who is passing by. I remember that Blackburn told me something that moved me, so I call him, and he joyfully stops and walks to meet me.
"Blackburn told me you were a good friend of Brian during BUD/S" I say.
"Well" he squirms, and his smile disappears, "Yes. I was".
I smile at him. "My cousin was his girlfriend, during high school and a couple of years after that. She loved him, and so did all of our family" I explain, and his eyes are wide. "They had a friendly break up, because they were by then more friends than lovers. But I really liked Brian, he was amazing. And I'm really grateful that you took the time to inform the lady who took care of him about his death. My cousin told me, and Blackburn confirmed it was you. Thanks for being such a good friend for him".
Clay nods, and I see his eyes filling with tears. "I'm glad. U-hum. He was a great guy. I felt so bad when he died like that. I saw him falling, Vicky". I can see he's about to cry, and I place my hand on his cheek, but in a motherly way, and he's comfortable with that too.
"Whatever happened to him, he was doing what he loved, and had you as his friend. I'm sure he never regretted a thing. Okay?"
He nods again, and a couple of tears roll down his face. He pulls me for a hug, and I hug him too. After a few seconds, he calms down, nods, and presses my hand, thanking me for the support. I nod goodbye and turn to make my way to my cabin.
When I turn back, I see Jason leaning on a fence nearby, looking at me. He's serious and seems embarrassed to witness what happened between me and Clay, but I don't mind. It's nothing like he thinks, and I owe him no explanations.
He decides to walk to my direction, when he sees that I'm walking to my cabin.
"How's it going? Found out something? We're going nuts here, Vicky" he asks, anxious, standing in front of me, keeping his hands in his pockets. I notice he finally calls me by my nickname. He never did that before, even though the other guys do. After all, we've been working together for almost two weeks now.
"Actually, we found something, yes. Davis is mostly working on the information we got from the interrogations, but something else came up too" I say, and Jason listens, interested. "The CIA wants you guys to do some escorting and provide security during a meeting. I'll confirm the intel that Jessica still needs to give me and then I'll brief you guys".
Jason makes an annoyed face. "Escorting? Seriously? What the fuck".
"Well. Someone needs to do it. And in that case, you'll be needed, trust me. I'll tell you more when I brief you guys" I tell him, patiently.
But Jason is very impatient, and stares at me. "O-key. And when will that be?"
I frown, and look at the time. "Well... I'm just going quickly to my cabin, and in like, an hour, I can brief you. The meeting's only happening in, like, four hours".
He squirms. "But you could brief us now, so we can plan the escorting. If you say it isso importantfor us, Tier-1 operators, to be there". He looks at me up and down, and adds, "Why do you need to go to your cabin? Why can't you confirm the intel now and then go?" he harshly teases.
I cross my arms and stare at him, annoyed. Sometimes he treats Davis like that, I noticed, like they all work for him. But that definitely wouldn't happen now. I'm an Officer, and he should actually salute me. I hate when people do that, but I felt an urge for him to salute me now.
"Because, Master Chief Hayes" I start, walking closer to him, and he doesn't move an inch, looking down at me. He seems surprised by the bossy tone in my voice. "Like I said, I'm waiting for Jessica to still hand me all the intel. And I haven't left that goddamn room for almost twenty hours".
"So" I continue, coming even closer, and he still doesn't move, "Since I'm not yourpersonal slave" I harshly say, and he twitches his head to the side, "I'm going to take a relaxing hot shower", I say that, and I notice that I'm speaking too loud, because he glances to the sides, uncomfortable, so I lower my voice a little, "and then, I'll go back in there and wait for the intel. Andthen, I'll call you to brief you. WhenIthink it's best. Not whenyouwant me to".
He stares at me for a second, standing straight and with his hands in his pockets, then he relaxes his pose and smirks, smug.
"You don't have to get so flustered about it. I was just saying".
I try my best not to show my annoyance, so I decide to sarcastically smirk instead. "Of course you were", I say, and walk out of there.
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After I take my hot shower, I come back to the Command Center, with my hair still wet, and Jessica has just got her intel confirming where the meeting would take place. I check the location from satellite images and drone, and it all looks good, without any signs of suspect activity or an ambush. So I buzz the guys to come in for the brief, and not even a minute later, they walk in, Jason in front of them. They were probably waiting right outside. I thought I heard Sonny's laughter before.
"Hellou" Jason walks in, looking playful and smirking. I just nod, behind the pulled up collar of my puffy camouflage jacket, because the air conditioning inside that room is too cold, and my hair is still wet. I'm almost shivering.
But Blackburn and I brief them about the meeting, and alert them about the most important part. That the Taliban will be escorting too, acting in a joined operation with the Seals. They grumble, indignant, and rightfully complain that we can't trust them, and I don't disagree. But I let them know that I confirmed the location and other things, and that we're sending a friendly Afghani troop an hour before the meeting, so they can confirm everything. They grumble less, and Blackburn lets them know that the guy is Jack Daniels, known by the guys as JD. Most of them open a wide smile, they know him, and now they look a lot happier with the meeting, and are ready to go outside to meet JD that should be arriving soon. They get out of the room and Jason stands behind, with an apologizing expression.
He appears next to me after I turned to fold back some maps, and I only notice he's by my side because he casts a shadow on the map.
"You're silent" I mutter, not turning to face him, because I'm annoyed as hell, and my throat is already hurting. I was twenty hours inside the room with that air conditioning, and to come back with my hair wet only made it worse.
"You didn't really have to come back to brief us so quickly" he says, glancing at my wet hair, because he's obviously incapable of apologizing, so he kind of blames my own poor decision for my state.
"Are you saying that it was my poor decision that made my throat hurt?" I ask, turning to him.
He squirms. "I didn't know that". He sounds sincere, and looks around. "Can't they change the temperature?"
"Obviously, I tried. They can't. For some reason", I mutter.
He smirks and raises his eyebrows, then he walks to the oldest of the nerd guys there and whispers something to him, then the guy frantically nods to Jason and goes to some other wall, where he pushes some buttons. By the time Jason is next to me again, I hear a couple of low beeps and the temperature is closer to the temperature adequate to a person, and not a penguin.
"You're welcome" he cockily smirks again, hovering over me with his hands in his pockets. I'm quite impressed, but I just nod and make my way to the oldest nerd that he talked to before, determined and annoyed. I whisper some casual threats to his life and body, for lying to me before, then I come back to fold the maps next to Jason.
"Thank you" I softly say, looking up at him. "Good luck with the op" I add, and sit down to continue analyzing the intel from before, related to the interrogations. He silently nods and walks out.
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Davis and I continue analyzing and discussing the intel, and how could the cell be discovered and brought down, then we followed the guys' op, of them escorting and accompanying the meeting, when Jason lets us know, on the comms, that everyone who came earlier and was waiting was shot. It was an ambush, and JD was also dead. They found his hands cut, so they made him an example, a warning that they don't want Americans and the Afghani government trying to make peace there. The guys are obviously indignant and mad when they come back, and nobody can understand what the hell happened. Jason gives me, Lisa and Jessica a killer stare when he passes by, but his expression was also of angst. His friend was killed. I understand he is in pain.
Blackburn decides I should help out Davis with her intel first, then go back to the meeting to find out what happened there, with Jessica's help. So I do just that, now pressured to study the interrogations and hierarchy ladder even faster, because the cell was killing all the leaders of the country, to gain more power. And friends of the U.S. too. Davis mentions that the guys were organizing a gathering in memory of JD that late afternoon, and I tell her she can go, but I'll stay. I'm exhausted and starting to get feverish, and to be honest, if I can't go to bed and sleep, then I prefer to be inside the room, which now has a normal temperature. If I stay in the cold outside, at the gathering, standing up, I'd get worse pretty fast.
But it doesn't matter, because by the time Davis is back, only an hour later, I'm already shivering with a fever, and she's really worried.
"Vicky, please go to bed for a while. You'll get worse, and to be honest, you'll be useless to us if you can't focus. You can make a mistake" she says, sounding very reasonable.
Since I'm not that stupid, cocky, nor I think I can do everything better than the others, I agree with her and crawl my way to my cabin, shuddering with the wind. I really should have gone to bed earlier. I get in my room and put on my big and cozy gray sweatshirt, that is like a dress, and I usually wear in my house while watching TV. I totally need the cozyness now. I don't have any medicine for my fever, so I just go to bed and fall asleep almost immediately, smothered by the heavy blanket.
I must have heavily slept for a few hours, when I hear a very aggressive knock on my door. A bang, actually. I'm still groggy when they knock again. I check my phone, standing up. It's only 2130 hours, so it's not that late, but obviously something happened, because the person is knocking at my door with urgency.
I open the door, confused, and Jason is there, angry as fuck, and also hot as fuck, leaning on my door frame with his forearm. He glances down and blinks.
He immediately asks "Can I come in?"
I hesitate, because I don't understand why he would need to come in my cabin at that hour.
"I just want to talk" he says, but still angry, and I think that maybe something happened to one of the guys, so I take a small step to the side. I don't really want to talk, because my throat still hurts. And I'm still feverish, so he barely walks in and I quickly shut the door, to keep the cold air out.
He walks around my room and notices my paper target, with the precise shots, glued on one of the walls, but he doesn't say anything and turns back to me, agitated.
"What happened?" I ask, now terrified.
He claps his hands together. He's wearing his black puffy jacket and jeans, and he looks bigger than ever in there. He could reach the ceiling of the room with his elbow.
"You see, Victoria" he starts, agitated and looking angry, "I don't really care much about what people do around here, or their personal affairs and such" he gestures and raises his eyebrows, mad, and I'm completely lost and feeling awkward with him in my room. I pull my gray sweatshirt down, unconsciously.
"What? What's going on?" I ask, muttering.
"I don't care, Victoria, about who people here fuck with" he harshly says, and now I'm more awake and very afraid about what he's doing in my room, but he continues, "I'm not naive. I know that the Navy is like a fucking high school. But what Idocare about, is whenmy team" and he points at his chest, walking closer to me, and I take a step back, closer to the door, "is harmed by those affairs". He's heavily breathing, looking furious.
"A man died, Victoria. During your op" he whispers, but with a husky and dangerous voice, and I feel like he punched me in the stomach.
"Excuse me?" I ask, also whispering dangerously, and now I'm the one livid. "Are you implying that JD died because of something I did?"
"Yes, that is exactly what I'm implying" he opens his arms, dramatically, walking closer, and I'm too lost for words. Maybe he read something somewhere, that I got wrong? I don't understand. I confirmed all the intel that we had and that Jessica gave me. He notices my confused expression, and thinks he's right, so he continues.
"I knew it was too weird, huh, someone climbing up the ladder so fast" he mocks, with a dangerous voice, "and in less than a year, you had to change DEVGRU teams? I mean, who does that, huh?" he asks, hunching down on my direction.
I frown, confused again. "What are you talking about? What do you know?" I'm thinking that Blackburn told him something about how we know each other, or why I left Foxtrot, but it wouldn't explain his aggression towards me. On the contrary.
"Oh, of course" he sarcastically chuckles, with his arms crossed, "you're worried that your little secret will come out, right? Well, don't worry, I'd never do anything to hurt Anna. His wife. Don't know if you got a chance to meet her. Maybe you saw her between her chemo sessions".
I'm lost for words. He knows something and it's obviously not the truth. But as soon as I make an exasperated expression, he thinks that I'm just confirming what he says, so he continues to mock.
"I'm still intrigued about how the fuck you managed to convince Blackburn that you'd be a good addition to Bravo. I mean, is he actually in love? Or was he just tricked by you" he comes even closer, now he's at arm's length. "Either way, I'm letting you know that I won't fall for your little play, so don't even waste your time on me. And I don't care about how obsessed Blackburn is with you, you will be out ofmy teamvery soon".
I've heard enough.
"You ass hole" I say, shivering with the fever and anger, "Who the fuck do you think you are to talk to me like this? You don't know me. You obviously don't even know Blackburn well enough, to talk about him like that. But apparently you know Foxtrot One, huh?" I state, and he smirks.
"Yes. Glad that you managed to figure that out, Victoria" he sarcastically says, with a hand on his hips and leaning towards me.
He continues, pointing at the floor, "The thing is, you were brought to my team to hide your own shameful actions, and now a man is dead because of your incompetence".
I gasp and slap his face so hard that I immediately feel the pain on my hand. No one ever, ever, called me incompetent. Even though he has a beard to soften the blow, I hit him hard. My hand was already warm from the fever, and now it burns from the slap. What else burns is his face, that now is very red, both because of the slap but also because he's livid, and looks like he's in complete shock. He places his hand on his cheek, turning his face again and stares at me, serious.
I can't remember the last time that I actually slapped someone. "You son of a bitch. I was trying to give you the benefit of the doubt, thinking that maybe you're just a moron who believes any shit that people tell you. But apparently not, you're also a disgusting misogynist, who thinks that a woman can only go up when she goes down on her superiors".
He looks at his hand, after taking it off his cheek, then looks back at me. "You know, I'll have to report this, right?" he dangerously mumbles to me.
"Oh" I take another step closer to him, now too close for his comfort, but I don't care anymore about that. "Please, Master Chief Hayes. You do that. You probably had to report a lot of slaps received from women, right? Given the way you treat us. Like a complete ass hole. And while you report me, perhaps you could take a look at my file. Obviously it's my right to not show it to you, but I'll let Blackburn know that you're coming and he'll give it to you. I insist".
Jason's face twitches to the side. "Hell, I bet he would. I bet that nothing that I said is even written on that file".
"No, Hayes. It's not. And you'll figure out why the second you read it" I say, dangerously, and he looks at me stern, but apparently his will to fight is gone. And so is mine, but I try to not demonstrate how exhausted I am. So I turn to the door and open it.
"You're forgetting, Hayes, that I'm an Officer. So is Davis, and now I understand why you treat her like shit sometimes. Because you're a piece of crap. So the next time you see me and Davis, after you read my file, you'll have to either apologize, or salute us" I say, with a smug expression, victorious.
He looks at me, still furious, but a little confused now. Good. He decides to walk out the door, but I touch his arm when he passes by me, and he stops, looking at me.
"Believe me. You'll feel anurgeto apologize and salute me. And if you do, I may forgive you. Maybe" I murmur to him, looking into his eyes. He frowns and quickly walks out the door, walking fast.
I shut the door loudly behind him, just in time to feel my lips trembling. I try not to, but I cry. I lay on my bed and cry and sob until I'm out of breath. Because Blackburn promised me that I would be joining a family. That Bravo was the best team there was. And maybe the guys were, but with a team leader like that, it doesn't matter. I'd have to change teams, again. Because of the actions of the team leader. Again.
I decide to not waste any time and text Blackburn, because I have two urgent things to tell him. One, is to ask him if he could transfer me to another DEVGRU team; and if not, an Army Rangers team would be great. And the second thing I say, is that he can show Hayes my file when he asks him to. I insist on that.
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