Episode 1: A Newer Hope

Chapter 4: Lasguns For Everyone

The rebels and patriots were, to say the least, disappointed. Some of them booed, and others were giving dirty looks to Professor Lu Ten and the giantess that emerged from his portal gate.

"Oh, come on!," Admiral Buster Nimitz shouted in grief. "We conduct our first use of this miracle machinery, and it gives us an oversized whore?"

"You've got to be kidding me!," General Stephen Hawking added. "All we wanted was a Wookiee with a laser crossbow! After all that toil, death, destruction and hardship, why don't we receive proper results?"

"Officers, this is no time to panic!," Mr. Campbell scolded. "An ally is an ally, and we have to work with whoever we have been given. Now, let's ask this towering, imposing lady a few questions, answer whatever doubts she has, and maybe she'll join our campaign in the name of freedom."

The noise died down the instant the ex-President finished his sentence, out of respect.

Then, he asked the 9-foot tall Amazonian warrior for elaboration on who she was, before giving her the full truth on what was happening in this world of ours.

"So, I'm sure you're confused as hell with what's going on."

"Damn right I am! I was just about to fight some beefy Orc warriors when a rainbow blinded me and I ended up here, in a place I don't even recognize, even after decades of intergalactic sailing! Now tell me where I am, stranger, or I'll skin you alive, dismember your body, and hang you on a wall!"

The crowd gasped in horror, and tensions were high, with guns at the ready in case the brute tried anything irrational.

But right before a bloody massacre could erupt, a knowledgeable U.S Marine in the motley company of heroes managed to establish a legitimate diplomatic conversation, with an obscure fantasy character of all things.

"Captain-General Thianna Frostborn! There is no reason to vent out your rage upon these broken men. Let us instead work together, to take the fight to the monsters at our door, who have driven my world into a time of despair and darkness!"

"I am Gunnery Sergeant Lucas Chin of the United States Marine Corps, and I have a proposal to make. Listen carefully, because this is a request I'm sure you'll be willing to accept."

"We have a lot in common, winter soldier, even though we know nothing about each other. We also share a common goal, too- my fellow patriots are preparing to embark on a last-ditch crusade to liberate the oppressed and secure peace and freedom for future generations, and we need all the help we can get."

"You and your fellow Rebels fought authoritarian institutions all across the Milky Way galaxy and beyond, risking everything for the sake of your dreams of democracy... so please, I beg of you, lend us your support in toppling my world's bastion of tyranny.

"I know you might have other things on your mind, but you once said that fighting for freedom and helping the helpless is its own reward. My eldest son read about your adventures and your heroic efforts, and was inspired by them, up until the day those vile monsters I spoke of, took him from me."

"Considering I could not save my own family, I have absolutely no right to ask this of you, Thianna, but will you join my country's struggle against the odds? We are powerless here, you're our only hope."

At the same time Sergeant Luke Chin was speaking, erstwhile President Campbell switched on television footage from the opening scenes of the Third World War, which displayed the full range of horrifying atrocities and crimes committed by the Axis forces against American civilians, in extremely graphic, gruesome, and grotesque detail.

Many of the occupants of Area 666, including soldiers, medical staff, politicians, firefighters, scientists and law enforcement officers alike, were gripped by the sickness of trauma, seeing the horrors of war being played on repeat. Several people vomited, and others dropped to the floor clutching their stomachs.

It was a living nightmare stuck in the heads of untold millions, that nobody on this earth would be stoic enough to forget completely.

And in a moment of empathy, as well as shared emotions and experiences, Thianna was caught in the grip of a traumatic flashback of her very own.

She had experienced the exact same thing as many Americans in the grave tragedy of history, seeing everyone she knew and loved being either brutally murdered, thrown into a bonfire, or subjected to sadistic mutilation and torture techniques, then becoming the victim of survivor's guilt in the aftermath.

Naturally, she let out a bereaved shriek of pure rage and pained sorrow, before falling to her knees and crying.

Then, out of the blue, Gunnery Sergeant Chin did something he hadn't done for a very long time, since his whole family was taken from him:

He gave Thianna a hug.

And she hugged him back.

This embrace reached her broken heart, reminding her of a father's love, and reassured her that this cause was worth fighting for.

The half-giant got to her feet shortly afterwards, and made the best combat stance she could, saluting Luke and his fellow freedom fighters.

"The moment has arrived! Knowing that we both cherish the same righteous, noble values, I will do everything in my power to help save your free nation from annihilation. Now, guide me to war, little ones! There is nothing left to fear, because we all have nothing left to lose."

The members of Project Brainstorm and the base's crew cheered wildly, their mission accomplished. Now, the United States and its allies could finally have a chance of winning this war.

"Good work, soldier!," Admiral Buster Nimitz told the Gunnery Sergeant single-handedly responsible for the vital negotiations. "I sure am glad we have a Warhammer fan in our ranks! Otherwise this would've ended very poorly!"

"Don't mention it, sailor!," Luke said. "Just thank the Professor and his team for building the Dreamforge in the first place."

"That being said," Nathan Lu-Ten replied, "Did our new giantess companion bring any sort of wacky science fiction weapons with her? That would be even more helpful!"

Thianna heard the conversation, and proceeded to answer the Professor's question.

"Did you say weapons? Weapons are essentially my religion. I've got plenty of spare Lasguns for everyone... but unfortunately, not very much else. We're going in with a clear disadvantage in armament. Hopefully our enemies aren't that much more resilient than the average Orc."

She revealed what appeared to be a leather satchel of some kind, with an array of mechanical buttons on its side. Pressing one of these, Thianna reached inside her bag, and tossed out hundreds upon hundreds of advanced firearms which were meant to fire searing laser beams and volatile bolts of plasma, coming in dozens of different models.

Clearly the bag was magical in some way, because it wasn't even big enough on the outside to fit more than four rifles and their ammunition, perhaps also hinting at a classic use of pocket dimensions.

"Lasguns for everyone! Line up and get your directed-energy weapons here!"

"Are these like the blasters in Star Wars?," Mr. Campbell wondered aloud. "Things are just getting better and better!"

Luke Chin picked up a particularly heavy, intimidating-looking lasgun, which was fed by dual battery magazines, allowing for twice the ammo capacity, and had five different firing modes, each one more powerful and energy-hungry than the last.

The weapon also possessed a powerful telescopic rangefinder with assorted optical settings, scanning in different wavelengths of the electromagnetic spectrum, as well as a pump mechanism for quick reloading, a vibration feature that lightly pulsed when battery ammo charge was low, and a smooth trigger grip for easy handling and aiming.

"The A280 Gordasha Pattern laser rifle," he said in smug satisfaction. "The perfect universal rank and file infantry weapon, used by the Thican Steel Legion. I never thought I'd see the day where I tested out a gun from 40,000 years in the future. Makes me wish my eldest son was still here, for some reason. He had a prop version of this exact weapon model!"

"I happen to know that our base has more than two dozen Blackhawk helicopters of all different variants in a deep storage facility," Professor Lu-Ten informed the audience, which was geared up for a war of resistance and retribution. "Let's start our grand rebellion by taking back Hill Air Force Base from the People's Liberation Army. Mr. Campbell, what is your course of action for such an operation?"

"Send Thianna ahead as a vanguard once we're reasonably close enough," the former president said. "I'm sure whatever gadgets are in her magic satchel will give her a sufficient speed boost. While the fascists are busy being violently sodomized by a 9-foot tall death machine, we arrive on the scene, then drop in using parachutes and jetpacksâ and yes, we're going to kill them all."

"Gunney Chin is going to be on the job, Commander-In-Chief! You can count on me and the rest of us- dodging death on the daily together forges bonds unlike any other, after all."

"Let's go slaughter some Rice Nazis!"