I am struggling with terms of endearment for them. I would love suggestions.
Carly is pressed up against Jason's back, her arms clinging fiercely around his waist. She's wrapped up in his jacket, swallowed by the soft black material. They have been riding for hours, stopping only for gas and the baby playing havoc on her bladder. Jason has taken them far beyond the city limits of Port Charles, driving them through little towns and farming communities. The sense of freedom, of escape, helps her feel like she can breathe again. Because, the scene at Kelly's runs like a broken record in her mind, threatening to pull her down. But here on the bike, with the world whipping past them so fast she can't make out any of the details, it feels like she can outrun all the mess she left behind. She knows it's just a fantasy, but dammit, let her have the fantasy for a moment.
Jason pulls off the road at a little diner in a tiny town called Redemption Springs. It looks like it came straight from the 1950's, with a red and chrome front. It has a bright red neon sign, but the R is out on the sign, so it reads 'Angel's Dine.' Pulling off her helmet, she shakes her hair out and gets off the bike. Until they pulled into the parking lot, she didn't realize how hungry she was. However, the baby and her stomach are demanding food, and in her stomach's case, loudly.
Taking off his own helmet, Jason turns towards Carly, assuring himself that she is okay. The three times they had stopped for gas and so she could go to the restroom, she had been antsy and anxious until they were back on the bike. Personally, he thinks the confrontation at Kelly's could have been much worse, but he sees the emotional toll it has taken on her. When he dismounts from the bike, he reaches his hand out to her, linking their fingers together.
"How are you feeling?" He asks her gently, pulling her towards the restaurant.
She considers the question for a moment before shaking her head. "I have no idea, and I don't think I can handle analyzing it too much right now. It's taking everything in me to just keep standing."
Walking into the diner, a waitress yells out from behind an eat up counter, "Pick any available seat, I'll be with you in a minute."
When Carly sits down in a booth facing the door, Jason sits beside her. It's only partially for safety reasons. He wants her to be as close as possible, so he can offer her comfort and make her feel just a little more secure. He knows she's spinning out, and feels the real fear that she's going to bolt. It was part of the reason he had taken her for the ride, hoping it would give her enough of the feeling of running without the actual running. Right now is a disastrous time for him to leave town, but if she goes, he goes.
She leans her head against his shoulder, "A bike ride was the perfect idea. Now, I just don't want to go back. I don't think I can face Mama. Or God, what if Bobbie is there? Just thinking about it makes me want to throw up."
The arm that's holding her, pulls her tighter to him. "You are going to have to talk to them eventually." He advises her.
"Do I, though? If I never go back, I can avoid the conversation forever." She says it playfully, though she is only partially joking. He stiffens and gives her a look that's a mixture of vulnerability and determination.
"Now is a really bad time for us to leave. I have to keep up a front in the organization or all the people we care about will be in danger." He tells her regretfully. Then, in a harder tone, "And you aren't going anywhere without me."
She doesn't say anything, she just has a soft smile on her face. She kisses his shoulder, then leans her head back against him, taking comfort in his presence. She keeps waiting for him to walk out that door, to leave her like everyone else has, but instead she feels a joyful ache in her heart when she realizes he's determined to stand by her.
The waitress comes over, giving the lovebirds a smile. She's in her forties, with a bleached blonde pixie cut, and is wearing a bright pink retro waitress dress. Her smile is kind as she asks, "Aren't you two just the cutest? My name is Marlene, what can I get you?"
Jason doesn't even look at the menu, "Burger and fries, with a chocolate milkshake."
Writing it down, she turns to Carly, "And you, darlin'? What can I get the little Mama?"
"You don't happen to serve breakfast do you?" Carly asks from her perch on her husband.
"All day." She informs her with a smile.
Giving her an answering grin, Carly sits up, ordering, "Pancakes, with scrambled eggs and bacon. Make sure the bacon is extra crispy. And a vanilla milkshake."
When the waitress leaves to get their order started, Jason turns to Carly, lightly stroking her skin almost unconsciously. His hands brush against her arm, the side of her face and neck, running through her hair, and she feels comforted and loved. She feels tears prickle the back of her eyes at his sweetness, and then as her emotions careen, knocking against each other like bumper cars, an answering fear that one day he'll look at her in disgust or pain, that her antics will be just one too many. She feels panic set in at the thought. Turning to him, she grabs his face, her hands cupping his cheeks desperately, "Don't ever leave me. I couldn't bear it. I don't know why you love me like you do, why you always stick up for me and step up for me, but I can't live without it now. Promise me, promise you won't ever leave me."
"I already did that… before God and all the people I care about." He reminds her, his voice calm but earnest, seeing the anxiety creeping in.
"Promise me again. Please, Jase." She begs. Her eyes are pools of fear and pain. She is so emotionally raw, she's spiraling, and Jason is the only solid thing keeping her from disappearing somewhere deep and dark. Why he hasn't run screaming from her mess is a mystery. She feels like she's lower than pond scum. And as much as there's a little voice telling her to run, not to get her filth on Jason, she's selfish enough that she's never giving him up. His love feels as necessary as air at this point, and she'll fight dirty to keep him. She has never had anything so wonderful that was truly hers, not like the family they are building. There's nothing she won't do for him.
He puts his hand on the nape of her neck, pulling her close. With her face close enough to feel his breath against her lips, he declares with the same gravity he gave his wedding vows, "I promise I will never leave you. I'm not sure I would even be able to let you leave me. I would chase you down and bring you home where you belong."
A tear drips down her cheek, as she leans her forehead against his. She shakes her head against his, "Don't let me. If I ever get scared and stupid, don't let me get away with it. Fight for me even if you have to fight me."
"I promise," he kisses her hard, pressing her against him. When he pulls back, he wipes the tears from her cheeks. "I love you…" his hand goes to her belly, "and our baby. I will fight anyone and anything for you, for both of you."
The waitress chooses that moment to bring the couple their milkshakes. With a big grin, she practically coos over them, "You two are just too sweet. Darlin', you've got every woman in this diner green with envy." Carly gives the waitress a smile, but she's too jittery, too raw for it to reach her eyes. "Here are your milkshakes. The rest of your order will be up soon."
"Thanks," Jason tells her distractedly, his focus still on his wife. When she leaves, he moves the milkshake in front of Carly, ordering her, "Have some. You have to be starving by now."
She leans forward taking a sip, and lets out a purr of happiness. Comfort food is what she needs. The sweet creamy flavor hits her tongue, and she suddenly feels a kick from her belly, and freezes. "Jase! The baby, it kicked!" She grabs his hand, putting it on her belly. "Come on, Mr. Man, kick again for Daddy."
A couple seconds later, she feels it again. She beams at Jason. "Our baby is saying hello." Talking to her bump, she asks, "Are you hungry? I'm sorry. They've got some food coming soon. I promise Mommy is about to feed you." She takes a big sip of the milkshake, and the baby gives her another kick. She gets a soft look on her face. "I love you so much, little one," She turns her attention back to Jason, as the baby gives her an answering kick. "Did you feel that? It's like he responded. Our baby just kicked when I said something to him. Isn't it crazy? How insane is it that we made a tiny little person. We had really fantastic sex, and now there's a little human who can kick. It's wild; it's… miraculous."
Jason's focus moves between beaming back at her, and looking in awe at her belly. "That's amazing." He leans forward to give her soft, sweet kisses, his hands continuing to rest on her bump. He feels the baby continue to kick, and feels such a tidal wave of love for the little life growing, and for the woman in front of him, protecting their child and helping them grow. "You're amazing. This baby is so lucky to have you. It's going to have the best mother." Then, leaning forward to her belly, he says, "Hello, little one. You continue growing to be nice and strong. I'll take care of your Mom. You've got the best mom in the world. We love you."
Her voice cracks as she says emotionally, "Jase…"
"I'm serious. I know you are beating yourself up right now, that the voice inside your head is telling you God knows what. But, Carly, the way you love me, the way you fight for the people who are important to you, this baby is going to feel so loved and know that they always have someone in their corner. Our child is lucky to have you; I'm lucky to have you." Jason looks deeply in her eyes as he pleads, "Promise me you won't leave me. I know you are feeling overwhelmed. I know that everything back in Port Charles is messy and causes you anxiety. I also know that this is usually when you run and put up walls. But losing you… it would destroy me."
Putting her hand on his cheek, she vows, "I promise. I'm not going to lie, the urge to run is there, but I need you now. I hate needing anyone; it feels terrifying. But, Jase, I don't want to spend a single day without you."
He breathes out a sigh, a smile on his face. "Good. Like I said, I'll just pack a bag and come with you if you ever feel the urge to leave."
She smiles, and it's a smile that brightens when the baby begins kicking again. Grabbing his hand, she puts it on her bump. "The baby is giving his approval."
He smiles with awe still shining in his eyes. Then, with a sideways glance, he asks, "You keep saying he, and you called him Mr. Man earlier. Do you know something I don't know?"
She looks a little shy, nervous he's going to think she's foolish, "I… I don't know, it's just a sense I get. I see a little boy who looks like you, with your beautiful eyes. He's going to be fierce and strong, but also a good man." She leans into him, "Just like his dad. You probably think…"
"That it's beautiful. I love that picture." At her raised eyebrows, he shrugs, "I don't really get it, but they say moms can sense that kind of stuff."
They're interrupted by the waitress bringing out their food. "Here you go." Then, looking at their hands resting on Carly's belly, she gushes, "My little one did the same thing when I'd have one of our milkshakes. He'd just kick up a storm. That baby's going to have a sweet tooth, mark my words."
The smile Carly gives her this time is full and genuine. Then, she lets out a moan at the smell of the breakfast in front of her. When her stomach growls at the same time the baby kicks, Jason urges, "Eat."
Pouring syrup on her pancakes liberally, she grumbles down at her belly, where her child is kicking up a storm, "I'm about to, give me a second."
Jason looks at her with a dopey smile on his face, watching her talk to their child. He lets out a chuckle as she takes a huge mouthful of pancake, her cheeks puffing out as she starts chewing. "Slow down. It's not going anywhere."
She bumps his shoulder, giving him as much of a smile as possible with chipmunk cheeks. When she finally swallows, she enthuses, "That's so good. Oh my God, I needed this. My food ended up all over the floor at Kelly's." She wilts for a moment, then with a valiant effort, she gives him a genuine smile, "Our child is giving me hell."
They eat in silence for several minutes. Finally, Carly sits back, rubbing her hands over her bump, then leans her head against his shoulder with a yawn. When he finishes his, he eats the last few bites of her pancakes and eggs, then puts his arm around her pulling her into his chest.
Her eyes are drooping as he studies her. She needs to rest and they're still at least an hour or hour and a half outside of Port Charles. He's scared she will fall asleep and fall off the bike. Grabbing his phone, he calls Johnny. When he answers, he asks, "Hey man, how are Brenda and Carly's mom doing?"
Johnny answers, with a hint of grumbling in his tone, "Brenda is fine; she's back in the boss's penthouse. She's worried about Carly, but otherwise she's okay. She has actually been helping with your mother in law." Then, he hesitates for a second before confessing, "Mrs. Benson and Bobbie Spencer… have been together since you left. They are currently in your apartment. Last time I checked on them, they were looking at some baby picture album that Carly's mom brought with her."
Jason lets out a sigh, then when Carly looks up at him with questions in her eyes, he tells his friend, "Carly is too tired to make it back, and she's not up for a discussion tonight. Let Bobbie and her mom know." Then, with only a little annoyance in his voice, he adds, "Let Brenda know as well, or she's liable to come searching for Carly."
Johnny laughs, "Will do. It's nice how loyal she is to Carly. Unexpected, but nice."
"Yeah," Jason agrees with a soft smile at his wife. "Let me know if there are any problems. Otherwise, we'll be back tomorrow morning."
When he hangs up, she asks, "We're staying?"
Resting his head on top of hers, he reassures her, "You said you weren't ready to go home. Plus you're tired. We'll find a place to stay tonight, and hopefully you'll feel a little stronger tomorrow."
"Thank you," she says softly, touched that he listened to what she wants, a rarity in men in her experience. She cuddles further into his side as she praises, "You take such good care of me."
An hour later, Carly walks out of the bathroom of the hotel room Jason had rented for them. The furnishings in the room are outdated, but it's clean and well taken care of. Carly has definitely slept in worse. She'd taken a shower, and her hair is damp. She's dressed only in Jason's T-shirt, that hangs almost to mid-thigh, even with her belly pushing the shirt out. Jason is sitting on the bed in his boxers.
Opening his arms to her, she climbs on the bed and curls up into his side. "How are you doing?"
She considers the question for a moment, her eyes narrowed in thought, before letting out a sigh, "I'm scared. Just thinking about having to talk to Mama and Bobbie makes me sick to my stomach. What happens when she decides I've screwed up too much to want anything to do with me? And I could see that I hurt Mama too. They're both going to hate me." Her voice sounds defeated, her fear of rejection overwhelming any rational thought. The pain in her voice makes his chest ache.
He runs his fingers up and down her arm as he counters, "Johnny said they've spent the day together. Apparently, they were looking at your baby book the last time he checked. That doesn't sound like they hate you to me. They may be hurt, but I saw two women who love you." When she begins to protest, he gives her a gentle look, "But if I'm wrong, you'll still have me and the baby, and Sonny and Brenda. My grandmother and sister adore you. If your family makes the insane decision not to be part of your life, we'll just build our own. You have a family no matter what Bobbie or your mom decides."
Crying, she turns and climbs on his lap, straddling him. Leaning her forehead against his, she nods, "We're family. You…" A sob tears itself from her throat, "you are my family. Thank you for not leaving me… sob… not hating me."
He pulls back, so she can see the truth of his words in his eyes. His hands brush the hair away from her face as he denies fiercely, "Never. It's not possible for me to hate you, I love you too much. I know your childhood made you doubt yourself, made it hard to trust. But, one day I hope you see how wonderful you are, how worthy of love. Anyone who doesn't realize what a gift your love is doesn't deserve you. The way you love me makes me feel like the luckiest man on earth, the way you see me and fight for me is…" he looks down for a second, a look of concentration on his face. "When I woke up after the accident, everything was confusing. I didn't know the people who were calling themselves my family. They were making decisions for me and treating me like they knew me, even worse, like they knew me better than I knew myself. But the version of me they knew wasn't there anymore. It was frustrating having the people who were supposed to know me the most not really see me." He struggles to explain what's in his head, the words not easy. "Everyone else, even Sonny to a certain extent, still sees Jason Quartermaine. The people who have accepted me have either merged the two or adjusted, but I can still see it on so many people's faces, especially the Q's, when they look at me, they see someone else." He nuzzles into her, "And then this sexy, amazing woman walks into Jake's, and only sees Jason Morgan. And it's not just that you didn't know him, Jason Q, you somehow see me better than anyone else, even Sonny. You can read what I'm feeling and know what's going on inside when nobody else can. Do you know how good that feels, how freeing? And the fact that you fight for me, love me… Do you know how much that means to me, that you see me and you love me?" he shakes his head, "You could have anyone you wanted. I'm sure any man in Port Charles, or anywhere you go, would kill for a chance with you. But somehow it's me you fight for, stand up for; it's me you love. I don't know how or why, but I will do everything to deserve it and keep it, to keep you by my side where you belong. I will prove it in any way you need me to, every single day." He wipes away her tears, "I love you. It doesn't matter if you pull crazy stunts or life gets messy, I'm going to love you until the day I die. You can count on that, on me and my love for you."
Carly crashes her mouth into his with enough force to bruise both their lips, desperate for him to make her feel mindless to everything but the way he loves her. Her hands rip his shirt off her body, throwing it behind her, and then, reach to wiggle his boxers down. He makes a move to roll her over in an attempt to make disrobing a little less awkward, but she pulls back from the kiss and shakes her head, "No, I need… Let me be in control. I feel so… Help me to not feel like I'm losing everything, like I can…." She breaks off with a shake of her head.
Knowing that she needs this, both the physical connection and the sense of power when in every other way she feels powerless, he cedes control. He raises his hips so she can get his boxers down his hips, and she gives him a grateful smile and a quick kiss before she begins to inch them down. Instead of stopping when she gets his length free, she pulls them all the way off. "I don't want anything between us," she explains without being asked. When they are both bare, she crawls back up his body. The sight of her pregnancy swollen breasts swaying beneath her, as she purposefully drags her nipples against his skin, makes him painfully hard. Moaning as her lips meet his, he raises his hands to cup and fondle her breasts. His eyes close in bliss as she sinks down on him.
When she is seated, fully connecting their bodies, their eyes lock. "You're mine. Forever," he growls against her lips, consumed by her fire. As she begins the dance of passion, he moans out, "I love you..." then, letting out a groan, his head falls back in pleasure, as he continues, "so fucking much."
"I love you too," she moans against his lips. "I… oh, God… I love you so much."
And then everything disappears but the two of them, and the passion that carries them away.