Chapter 1
The Jedi temple arcade stood mostly vacant as Lorna paced the hallowed corridors in the hour before sunrise. As the rest of the Padawans slept, the halls remained silent save for the muffled sound of her boots and the whisper of her robes gliding across the polished floors.
She didn't have a destination. She simply wandered the arcade of the temple, staring up at the stained glass windows and the statues of past Jedi heroes, as if they could give her the answers to all her questions.
Sleep increasingly eluded her ever since her return three standard weeks prior from war-torn Felucia, where she and Master Secura had barely escaped with their lives. The experience left her shaken. Though she hid it well during training, her thoughts ran away from her in the stillness and solitude of the nights.
The mission on Felucia had been relatively straightforward; she and Master Secura, along with the 327th Star Corps, had been sent to capture Separatist Council member Shu Mai from the humid jungle planet. Their plan had unraveled with the arrival of spider tanks, and she and her Master found themselves captured and detained in a Separatist prison.
She suppressed a shudder at the memories of that prison. The fetid prison cell had closed in around her until she felt she could barely breathe. And that hadn't even been the worst part.
Glancing up at the vaulted ceilings and tall pillars of the arcade, she was suddenly grateful for their sweeping expanse - so very unlike that squalid cell. Her breath became shorter as she wondered what might have happened if she had not thought of a way to escape, her steps quickening.
She stumbled slightly as a shift in the material of the ground broke her catastrophizing reverie. In place of the polished marble, dirt and gravel now crunched beneath her feet. While her mind was lost, the Force had led her to the Room of a Thousand Fountains.
The room was situated at the base of the temple, seven stories high, and filled with lush greenery. Verdant copses of jade and golden-crowned trees grew alongside rambling thickets of bushes and grasses, exotic bromeliads, and flowers with as much color diversity as the universe itself. The sweet songs of birds and insects filled the air and the sound of water trickled over the myriad fountains, brooks, and waterfalls that dotted the garden.
Lorna breathed deeply, catching the rich, earthen scent of Jebwa flowers blooming nearby, dispelling the memory of the filth of the cell. The artificial breeze ruffled her thick, black hair, left down from attempted sleep. Normally she would sweep the mass of waves into a tight bun, save for the Padawan braid she left draped over her right shoulder.
She sat on a mossy stone near a fountain that bubbled out of a mound of pebbles and rocks and flowed into a nearby stream. She looked up at the domed ceiling, which was holoprojecting the moonless night sky of Alderaan. A twinge of pain shot through her neck as she tilted her head upwards. Bringing her head level once again, she closed her eyes, choosing to ignore that old ache.
The Force called to her, and she reached out, feeling its presence in all of the living things surrounding her. Anxious thoughts threatened to intrude, but she pushed them away, concentrating on the moment, just as Master Secura had taught her.
She directed her thoughts to the pebbles, willing them to lift off of the ground. A few of the smaller pebbles floated up, levitating a few inches in the air. As she sank deeper into the meditation, she extended her will a bit further, pushing on some of the larger, fist-sized stones. The Force flowed freely through her, sweeping her into its peaceful current.
Suddenly, a ripple of dread flashed into her mind. It did not have a solid image, just a dark cloud of foreboding warning pushing against her consciousness. The feeling startled her and shattered her concentration. All of the stones dropped, splashing back into the fountain.
Lorna opened her eyes, her brow furrowed in frustration.
The alarming feeling she had experienced rapidly faded, but it gave her pause. Was her anxiety getting the best of her once again? Or was the Force trying to tell her something?
"Why can't I keep my focus?" she asked the stones.
"Because you have not let go of your fears, my Padawan."
The voice came from behind her, but she did not need to turn to know that it was Master Aayla Secura who spoke.
The Twi'lek Jedi approached and sat beside Lorna, gazing placidly at the fountain.
"You are not sleeping because your thoughts linger on Felucia, yes?" Master Secura asked.
Lorna nodded, staring at the fountain and avoiding her Master's gaze.
"You did well during our mission, Padawan. Your gift for influencing minds with the Force allowed us to retrieve our lightsabers from the guards. Your level-headed thinking is the reason we escaped."
"Level-headed?" Lorna scoffed. "It was you, Master, who remained a bastion of calm on that mission. I was terrified the whole time." Her shoulders tensed at the memory. "I feel the fear even now. When I close my eyes, I can smell the rotten stink of that cell, I can feel the duracrete walls closing in and... I can still hear them." Her voice wavered and dipped barely above a whisper.
She never caught a glimpse of the other inmates in the prison, but she would never forget the sounds of their anguish. Not cries of terror or pain, but the haunted, despairing moans of those who had been there for a long time and had lost hope of ever getting out. The mourning of those who had exhausted desperate rage, tears, and bargaining and had begun to lose their sense of self.
And as she and her Master escaped, they had not been able to take any prisoners with them.
"You mourn those we could not save," Secura said, understanding.
"Mourn them, yes. And I wonder if we might have become one of them had I not been able to sway the guards."
"As Jedi, it is our duty to protect others, but even we cannot save everyone. Trust in the Force, and remember to consider a wider perspective. If we can end this war, thousands of Separatist prisoners across the galaxy may be released. We can help them now by remaining steadfast in our greater mission." Master Secura placed a gentle hand on Lorna's forearm. "Your feelings about our capture on Felucia are only natural, Lorna. Of course, being imprisoned is a harrowing experience. Acknowledge your feelings, but do not let them rule you," she cautioned.
Lorna let out a discouraged huff. "I shouldn't be struggling so much with my mental control at this point in my training." Unconsciously, her hands moved to the back of her neck, her fingers making small circles on a knot of tension there. "A Jedi should have mastery over their emotions. Some of the Padawans from my clan have already faced the trials to become Knights." Her posture sagged and her hand gave up on her neck, dropping into her lap. "I feel like I'm falling behind."
Without breaking their conversation, Master Secura scooted behind Lorna and began gently massaging where Lorna's hand had been. It was a persistent soreness that always seemed to manifest when she was at her most troubled. Master Secura knew of a Jedi healing technique that alleviated tense muscles, and she sometimes applied it when the pain burdened Lorna.
"Pay no heed to this notion of 'behind'. There is only where you are, in the present. You will face the trials when you are ready," Secura reminded as she used the Force to pinpoint Lorna's pain and begin smoothing the taut muscle there.
"Yes, Master," Lorna replied dolefully.
"You have come so far, Lorna. I am proud of the Jedi you are becoming. Ever since I found you, I knew the Force flowed strong in you. You will continue to overcome your fears."
"Despite where I came from?"
"Because of it. Your struggles have given you compassion and strength"
The encouragement comforted her, but it was short-lived. Her thoughts returned to that feeling of dread she had experienced during her meditation.
"Is there something else troubling you, Padawan?"
"I felt something strange while I was meditating. A dark fear gripped me, intruding on my concentration, but only for a moment. It felt like... something terrible is going to happen." Lorna glanced back at her Master, her expression vulnerable and questioning.
"The Dark Side sows confusion in our minds. It feeds off of our fears and conjures threats where there are none. Your wounds from Felucia are still fresh. Center your thoughts on the present and these feelings will disturb your meditations no more."
The reassuring words of her Master eased Lorna's mind a bit - though the feeling of impending danger still lingered like the smell of ozone after a lightsaber duel. But perhaps it was the Dark Side seeking cracks in her still-fortifying mental armor. Such sinister manipulation haunted all Force adepts, subtle in its erosion of confidence. She must strengthen her defenses through disciplined resilience against it. With her Master's guidance, she could overcome these ominous feelings and find the serenity that was the hallmark of the Jedi.
Lorna straightened with renewed confidence, a definitive goal giving her purpose.
Master Secura finished working on the knot. Lorna rolled her head in a circle and found the pain had subsided.
"Come. Try the larger stones again," Master Secura directed as she returned to Lorna's side. "This time, surrender to the Force completely. Keep your focus on the here and now."
Lorna closed her eyes again, searching for a connection to the Force. She imagined it like a flow of crystal clear water, flowing over her, through her, enveloping her. She reached her awareness towards the stones once more, lifting the small pebbles one by one, and finally, a few of the larger stones also levitated. Lorna held on to the feeling of the moment; the Force felt like a part of her and an extension of her all at once. Then she gently let the stones return to the fountain.
"With more practice, releasing your emotions will become like second nature to you. You do not lack mastery over the Force. Learn to master your fear and your trials may come sooner than you think," Secura said as a knowing smile tugged at the corner of her lips. The reassurance dispelled any lingering dismay left in Lorna. She met her Master's eyes, grinning, and found Secura smiling kindly back at her, her blue lekku flicking in encouragement. She stood and then pulled Lorna to her feet.
Lorna brushed off the moss still clinging to her robes. "I truly appreciate your guidance and will do my best to not lose confidence," she promised. She was filled with gratitude for her Master, who knew her so well, consistently offering reassurance - and massages - when she most needed them
"Let's break our fast and then head to the combat training rooms, Padawan. Perhaps vigorous physical conditioning will help sharpen your mental focus?"
The training grounds in the Jedi Temple were a sprawling expanse, specifically designed to accommodate a wide range of training exercises. The floors and walls were made of gray and tan durasteel, polished to a reflective sheen that illuminated the room with a soft glow. Large transparisteel windows spanned the walls, providing sweeping views of the Coruscant skyline.
There were sparring rooms, including the sophisticated arena, and battle simulators which could be arranged to create obstacle courses, complete with fluctuating gravity, temperature, lighting, and holographic enemies.
Master Secura had not been joking when she expressed her intention to sharpen Lorna's focus through intense physical training. She spent the better part of the rest of the day putting Lorna through every challenge imaginable.
Secura had Lorna race through the speed obstacle course dozens of times until her lungs burned. She lifted heavy stones, not permitted to use the Force for aid, and practiced balance in a wide range of difficult bodily positions and gravity simulations. By late afternoon, Lorna's muscles were screaming with fatigue and sweat soaked her Jedi tunic.
"Take a brief pause here," Master Secura instructed. "When you have caught your breath, we will commence lightsaber combat."
"Yes, Master," Lorna panted.
She paced the smooth floor, hands on hips, as she focused on slowing her breathing. She knew that strengthening her body was just as important to her Jedi training as honing her mind. This was exactly what she needed. The deep ache in her chest, the drumming of her heartbeat, the numb weakness in her muscles that she knew would give rise to soreness come morning - these sensations took her mind off of her worries. She gritted her teeth, determined to keep going without complaint.
Together they made their way to a circular dueling chamber with a blue mosaic pattern decorating the light floors.
Waiting for her inside was her favorite sparring partner and friend, Trilla Suduri, a young and skilled Padawan who had been in the same clan as Lorna during their time in the youngling crèche.
As Jedi initiates, Trilla was the only friend Lorna had. It wasn't that Lorna was unlikable or ostracized. She got along fine with peers and mentors both. It was simply that she preferred to focus on training and discipline rather than on building relationships. Attachment bore risks, after all - it was better to maintain prudent separation lest the Dark Side find a way to influence her. Closeness to others, outside of her relationship with Master Secura, required a vulnerability that made her uncomfortable.
Yet friendship found Lorna nonetheless in Trilla, whose blithe and spirited personality won over the reserved and reticent Padawan who habitually kept companions at arm's length. Everyone liked Trilla; she could charm a hungry Wookie with her charismatic wiles, and Lorna found it hard to resist her overtures to break down her barriers. And so Trilla, and by extension her master, Cere Junda, were the people Lorna spent time with most while in the temple, besides Master Secura.
Trilla's sharp eyes spotted Lorna right away and she strode quickly over to her, Master Junda following behind unhurriedly.
"Hey, Lor! Hope you're ready to get your butt kicked again because I'm-" she paused as she got closer, taking in Lorna's disheveled appearance from her sweaty tunic to the dark circles under her eyes. "You look about as fresh as a Hutt's armpit."
A slight smile tugged at the corner of Lorna's lips at the ridiculous image. "I may stink, but I can still take you in a fight," she volleyed back, trying to mimic her friend's breezy swagger.
Yet pretended bravado never fit Lorna as smoothly as it did Trilla. Besides, Trilla was a brilliant lightsaber duelist and bested her more often than not when sparring. Lorna harbored no resentment for those losses, however, only determination to elevate her skill. Crossing blades with Trilla never failed to challenge, nor did it fail to entertain through their easy rapport.
Lorna took a deep breath to center herself and drew her lightsaber, the green blade humming to life as she and Trilla took their positions at the center of the room. Their masters took up their places observing on the sidelines as Trilla ignited her blue blade.
Trilla's eyes took on a keen edge, all sign of jesting gone from her expression, as she lowered into her Ataru fighting stance. A lock of her silky jet-black bob slipped forward to partially obscure her face.
Lorna tucked a strand of her own shoulder-length waves - as dark as Trilla's but thick and unruly - behind her ear. She preferred the versatility of Niman. The form allowed her to adapt to many different situations, blending elements of other lightsaber styles into a balanced approach that suited her pragmatic nature.
Trilla launched herself at Lorna, sending a blow toward her midsection, which Lorna parried just in time.
"Watch your form, Lorna," Secura called. "Widen your stance."
Following instructions, Lorna blocked another intense flurry of blows as Trilla advanced. Each strike delivered by her friend radiated power and strength, pushing Lorna's limits and testing her skills to the fullest. Focusing on maintaining her balance, she used the Force to guide her movements and anticipate Trilla's attacks.
They continued their duel, lightsabers clashing and sparking in the air. Lorna blocked with precision, countering Trilla's strikes with calculated moves of her own.
As Lorna parried, keeping Trilla's relentless attacks at bay, she tapped into the Force to give her continued strength, keeping her eyes locked with Trilla's.
Something flashed in Trilla's face - for the briefest of moments, her eyes appeared tormented and her mouth was curved into a sneer. The change appeared and then disappeared so quickly that it took Lorna by surprise. Lorna's eyes widened in alarm and her concentration slipped.
Trilla slid past her guard, and her blue blade stopped inches from her neck.
Lorna blinked, trying to understand what she saw.
The vision of her friend's tormented face was gone, replaced by a look that was friendly, but confused.
"You were doing so well! What happened?" Trilla asked.
"I think I'm just tired. Haven't been sleeping well," Lorna replied, shaking her head.
Master Junda stepped forward. "If that had been a real fight, you'd be dead, Lorna. You must learn to draw on the Force for strength and push past your own physical limitations." To Trilla she added, "You are still relying heavily on your offensive form. As Jedi, our goal is not always to attack."
Lorna bowed her head, partially in respect, partially in self-consciousness. Of course, Master Junda was right.
Master Secura smiled at Lorna sympathetically, resting a hand on her shoulder. "You did well, Lorna. You are dismissed for the day. Take some time to do something that will rejuvenate you, mind and body."
Lorna sighed, relieved. She knew exactly what that activity would be.
"Trilla, want to come to the Conservatorium with me?"
The Conservatorium was, by far, Lorna's most treasured part of the Temple.
Ever since she had glimpsed it as a youngling, stopping to stare in wonder as Master Junda played her hallikset, she had been transfixed by music and the effect it had on her. Now, at twenty-five, it remained her sanctuary.
The room was small and simple, with soft lighting and acoustics designed to enhance the sounds that were produced within. There was a music player connected to the Holonet where almost any type of music could be accessed, and it was through this system that a whole world opened up to Lorna. The first time she sat down to explore the various genres available, she sat for hours, each new song taking her on a journey of both emotion and sound. From the soaring Alderaanian opera, to the hypnotic electronic beats of the trendy Coruscanti underworld musicians, to the exotic tribal songs of the natives of Pasaana, Lorna consumed it all eagerly. It took Master Secura's intervention to tear her away from her musical exploration and back to her Jedi training.
The room also contained a small selection of musical instruments available to Jedi who wanted to play in their free time. Without a doubt, Lorna's favorite was the electroharp. While listening to the many genres offered on the HoloNet, Lorna came across traditional spiritual hymns that originated in the Church of the Force on Jedha. These hymns, often sung by just one or two voices and accompanied by an electroharp, mesmerized her completely.
When she sat quietly, the gentle twinkling melodies of the harp and the ethereal combination of the soprano and tenor voices could draw her into a meditative state with very little effort on her part.
"Music is powerful," Master Junda had told her. "It can facilitate focus, healing, and mastering emotion. Learn to channel it and you will deepen your knowledge of the Force."
She learned how to play the electroharp from an old Jedi Master named Rasha, who had recently taken on the role of Conservatorium custodian after the death of her former apprentice. When Lorna was not training or on a mission, she usually came here to the Conservatorium to practice playing.
"You and Master Junda sure spend a lot of time in this place," Trilla said, a warm smile on her face as she casually examined the instruments.
Lorna looked down at the electroharp, running her hands lovingly over the smooth curve of its neck. "What can I say? It's relaxing here."
"Have you been working on anything new?" Trilla gestured to the harp Lorna was admiring.
"A little."
"Play it for me!"
Lorna picked up the harp and sat down on a cushioned chair, placing it tenderly in her lap. She brought her hands up to the strings, then fixed Trilla with a glare.
"Don't make fun of me."
Trilla placed a hand on her chest in mock offense. "I would never." She pulled a chair into the spot opposite Lorna and took a seat.
Lorna threw one more warning glance at Trilla then began to play a hymn she had recently discovered and taught herself. She closed her eyes and strummed her harp, then began singing in a rich and soulful voice.
"O gather ye faithful when shadows prevail
Whose glow yet lights the souls that fail
From stars that first lit ancient skies
The wellspring that calms and gently guides
Seek not to hurriedly heal what harms
The Force flows through light and dark
In balance, all wounds mend in time
Steering hearts toward the sublime
Our task: to curb base reaction's sting
With songs that mend sorrows and sing
And lift up what scorn has degraded
Give hope when light is dimly faded
Children are we of the Light's treasure
To receive grace beyond measure
Made heirs to transcend inner lies
Our home a place where darkness dies"
When she finished, she looked up at Trilla. For once, Trilla's expression was serious, her blue-gray eyes gleaming with a hint of awe.
"Lorna, that was awesome!" she exclaimed.
Lorna flushed slightly. "I practice whenever I can. It helps me focus when I play and sing."
Trilla looked hesitant, her lips pursing in thought as if debating whether she should say what was on her mind. In typical Trilla fashion, she decided to go ahead and blurt it out.
"It seems like you've been having trouble concentrating on your training lately. Do you want to talk about it?"
Lorna's eyes darted back down to the harp in her lap, her fingers fidgeting with the tuning pegs. She didn't really want to talk about it. But she knew Trilla would probably pester her until she told her something.
"It's... just this war," Lorna said apprehensively, thinking about all that had been on her mind as of late. "So much death, so many lives destroyed. Each mission I see how this conflict has torn the galaxy apart."
When the Clone Wars began, the Jedi relinquished their role as the galaxy's peacekeepers, instead serving as Commanders and Generals in the Grand Army of the Republic. As Jedi Padawans, Lorna and Trilla served alongside their Masters and the other Jedi, fighting in the Clone Wars to preserve the Galactic Republic against the Separatists who would tear it apart.
"Violence is not new to the galaxy, Lor. That's why the Jedi are needed. To protect the innocents from those who would do them harm."
"I'm not naive, Trilla." Lorna's voice was tinged with a slight edge. "I'm well aware of the brutality the galaxy has to offer." More than most, Lorna thought to herself.
Trilla's eyes widened in self-conscious realization. "Right... sorry, I didn't mean to sound patronizing."
Lorna sighed, her eyes softening. "It's alright. I know Jedi sometimes have to use violence to defend innocents. Our duty to preserve life and spread light in the galaxy was what made me want to become a Jedi. But shouldn't negotiations be our priority? By acting as participants rather than mediators, are we not perpetuating the war we aim to end? Sometimes I wonder if we really belong in the fight."
"Why wouldn't we?" Trilla replied with calm confidence, sitting forward in her chair. "The Separatists are evil. The Republic stands for what is right in the galaxy. It represents equality and democracy. We must defend it."
Lorna considered this and envied Trilla's unwavering assurance in her role. Lorna was absolutely dedicated to the Jedi and the Light Side of the Force. She believed in the Republic. She saw that there was some truth in what Trilla said, and yet she couldn't bring herself to share her conviction.
"I'm just sick of war," she said bitterly, setting the electroharp down next to her.
"It's almost over, Lor. Dooku is dead. And didn't you hear? General Kenobi was dispatched to Utapau today to take care of Grievous. With those two out of the picture, the fighting can't last much longer. You'll have your peace." Trilla gave Lorna an encouraging half-smile.
"I hope you're right. It's just-"
Lorna's speech came to an abrupt stop as a cold chill crept up her spine. It was as if a shrieking, dissonant voice suddenly joined the chorus of the Force.
"I feel it too," Trilla stood quickly, her hand hovering over her lightsaber at her belt.
Lorna unclasped her own saber and together they cautiously made their way out of the Conservatorium into the Temple corridors, which were eerily silent. This late in the day, activity would be winding down in the Temple, but she expected to see a few out and about.
"I don't sense anything here. Let's go down to the main level," Trilla suggested, her voice wavering. Lorna nodded and they boarded the turbolift. Her heart raced as that persistent discord in the Force set her every sense on edge. Before the lift even reached its destination, Lorna began to hear the clamor of blaster fire and humming lightsabers.
"Who would launch a frontal assault on the Te-" Lorna started incredulously, but her sentence was cut short. The turbolift doors slid open. Just outside the doorway, a pair of clone troopers stood, shooting at a target that was out of sight from the inside.
Without hesitation, the two Padawans ignited their lightsabers, the hum of the blades filling the lift.
"Troopers! Who is attacking the Temple?" Trilla barked.
Startled, the clones swiveled to face them, their helmets masking any expressions.
One of the clones raised his blaster, aiming it directly at Lorna. "Jedi traitors, blast them!" he yelled as he opened fire.