There are a lot of things that separate Oswald cobblepot and Edward nigma from other couples, but there was one thing that makes them quite similar to many

bedroom troubles, more specifically a difference of opinion on who's supposed to be where, both reason that they've been fucked most of the lives it's high time they are the one doing the fucking, usually they were civil enough to take turns, The night that started this dry spell between them started was Oswald's turn to be taken it up their ass, but that day was a bad day for him

First the Batman blows up another one of his smuggling operations out of the gotham Docs, then his most popular lounge singer quits to make it big in Hollywood, and all the stress makes him forget that it was his turn

One big argument later they haven't been having sex for 2 weeks, oswald lets out an exhausted exhale into the crook of one of his arms, he's just about to get up to go out for a smoke when something

Or will someone catches his attention, right in the middle of his office is a sharply Dressed brunette haired man sitting right squat in a chair, he looks like he's in there for a while though that's all too sure he would have noticed him earlier if he was

" who the fuck are you", oswald angry questions inching a hand closer to a desk drawer where he keeps a gun, he wrenches his hand back when like in a Flash the man is standing in front of his desk a hand press leisurely to the wood

" i go by many names" he pauses to raise up a clenched fist before outstretching a finger as they begin to use to speak," michael, master, your Majesty, horrible snake Beast" he pauses again resting his head on his other hand and a smug smile splitting his lips

" but I'd like you to call me a friend", the man Michael Maybe continues fluttering his eyelashes

"What do you want from me", Oswald retorts looking untrustingly at the brunette, the man just laughs a laugh that seems to hissing to be human

" we'll talk about that after I'm done doing something for you", Oswald flinches when he grabs a photo from his desk and holds it in front of his face looking at it curiously, "I take it you're having relationship problems", he smiles knowingly at Oswald turning the photo to show a picture of he and Edward together on their wedding day

" how did you", but he's cut off by the brunette beginning to talk again

" I'd like to consider myself a love expert, I just sort of know these things, and I can help you out of this predicament, i can promise you Mr cobblepot when you see Edward again he's going to be more than agreeable to let you vent your frustrations out on him in anyway you'd like", and with a tip of a hat he seemingly pulls out of nowhere the man vanishes from sight, oswald for his part pulls out a flask for one of his drawers start drinking from it

...

Oswald head disregarded his meeting with that odd man and some sort of stress hallucination up until he went back to his apartment at the top of the Iceberg Lounge to find Edward there

More specifically in their bedroom completely missing all of his clothing except for a nice little pair of green lingerie panties

And he was quite agreeable to be on bottom this time, and to be on bottom every time after this, oswald would have found this suspicious if he wasn't still a little bit tipsy from the too flasks of whiskey he downed after that little maybe hallucination visit

After night of passionate love making edward had fallen probably to Slumber leaving Oswald to be the only one to see a familiar shopping dress man just appear in his bedroom, he would have pinched himself if man didn't start talking

" been I fulfilled my promise, now I think it's time for your part of ideal", the man Chuckles Darkly as a gym attached to a necklace begins to Glow a similar shade to his eyes

,

Meanwhile many Earths away another set of oswald and Edward or having a nice little drink, unbeknownst to them they were being watched

a rotund fellow flapped his owl like wings silently as he hovered outside of the window carrying a muscular fellow in his surprisingly strong arms, the muscular man was gazing lustily at the blackhead Riddler of this Earth, mentally undressing the man as he licks his lips an anticipation of dominating a nerd

The end