Michael: Can you please be serious for five minutes?
Jeremy: My record is four, but I think I can do it.
Michael: Jail is no fun. I'll tell you that much.
Jeremy: Oh, you've been?
Michael: Once. In Monopoly.
Jeremy: Okay, help me please!
Michael: Got two words for you.
Jeremy: I bet they won't be helpful.
Michael: Your problem.
Jeremy: I was right
Jeremy: Cause your pretty and your smart, and your ignoring me so your obviously my type.
Michael, who was distracted: I'm sorry- what were you saying?
Jeremy: Perfect.
Jeremy: I'm in love with you.
Michael: We called off the prank war last night at midnight, dork.
Jeremy: I know.
Michael: Ah. Okay. Um. Cool. Neat. Very cool. Cool. Cool. Coolcoolcool-
Jeremy: Are you sure Michael's even gay? They barely even looked at me.
Michael: You know, I'm starting to regret showing you how that blender works.
Jeremy, drinking toast: Why do you say that?
Michael: If you were to vacuum up jello through a metal tube, well I think that'd be a neat noise
Jeremy: I beg to differ
Michael: Then Beg
Michael: Is letting someone win at chess sapiosexual bottoming
Jeremy: Does anyone in this godforsaken group ever think before they speak
...
hop, tending to gregaor's wounds: How would you rate your pain?
gregaor: Zero stars. Would NOT recommend.
hop: gregaor, you've ingested a dangerous amount of alcohol.
gregaor: The only dangerous amount of is none!
gregaor: Please, I'm begging you go to a doctor.
hop: I'm sorry is this OUR stab wound? Stay out of it.
...
vincent: Two bros!
vincent: Chillin' in a hot tub!
vincent: Zero feet apart 'cause we're GAY AS FUCK!
scott: I love you.
vincent, not paying attention: What was that?
scott: I said I'm selling you to the zOo-
vincent: Are you trying to seduce me?
scott: Why, are you seducible?