Chapter Five: Saving The World Before Bedtime
"Shiiiiiiiit!" Buttercup shouted as she was falling towards Earth at a high rate of speed, eventually taking a very nasty spill onto the ground.
She, Blossom, and Bubbles were in the middle of a battle with arguably Townsville's most evil force. Many argued he was more evil than Mojo himself. He was a crossdressing demon-like personality with lobster claws for hands. It was implied that he was an entity of biblical proportions, but he was simply known as His Infernal Majesty, or more commonly known as HIM.
Blossom and Bubbles were on a high-speed flight to stop HIM's most evil plot, but not only did they have to fight HIM off, but they had a race against time.
"Get the fuck out the way, HIM!" Blossom demanded as she swung a few punches and kicks towards the demon.
HIM easily dodged every blow that Blossom threw at him, then he delivered a double-clawed blow of his own that sent Blossom crashing at full speed into Bubbles, who in turn was also sent hurtling to the ground along with Blossom.
"You may as well just quit now, bitches!" HIM said in his feminine falsetto voice. "You won't fucking stop me this time!" He then added in his more evil demonic masculine voice.
Buttercup eventually recovered and managed to get in a good shot on HIM before she sped away, though HIM recovered quickly and once again hindered her progress by delivering multiple blows to her. Blossom and Bubbles eventually recovered and sped away, though HIM also hindered their progress with multiple blows to them as well.
As all three girls recovered from HIM's latest blows, HIM sped off and gave a goodbye wave to the girls while cracking an evil smile.
"So long, suckers!" HIM shouted out in his feminine falsetto voice.
"Shit, he's getting away!" Bubbles said in an urgent tone.
"Come on, girls. Plan Chaos Control. NOW!" Blossom instructed with Bubbles and Buttercup nodding.
All three girls closed their eyes and concentrated very deeply on what exactly they wanted to happen. While it took a few minutes, they did reach the end result as they opened their eyes, glows in their eyes in their preferred colors with a green glow surrounding them.
"CHAOS CONTROL!" All three girls shouted just before a massive flow of energy engulfed not only the immediate area around them but several hundred miles away.
The energy stopped all of time and space that was engulfed in it, and HIM got caught in it as well, stopping him in his tracks.
"There, that oughta hold him." Blossom said with a smile. "Now let's put an end to this shit!"
"Bye Felicia!" Buttercup shouted as the girls zoomed by HIM, all three girls getting in a small laugh at Buttercup's small joke.
However, the girls' small victory wouldn't last long. Because HIM had his own time-warping powers, he was able to reverse the effects of the energy the girls sent, thus breaking free and leaving him to pursue the girls again.
The girls were nearing their final destination, which was on a small island just outside of Townsville. There was a small rock there that was quickly gaining volume which they had to destroy. It was already at a decibel level that would shatter any normal person's hearing, but the girls, and HIM for that matter, knew of its more far-reaching effects.
"Girls, use your…." Blossom got out just before HIM appeared in front of them and knocked the girls into the small lake surrounding the island.
"Oh no, you fucking don't!" HIM said in his evil demonic masculine voice. "You're not fucking stopping me this time!"
After just a minute, the girls flew out of the water, soaked and wet, with some of the water getting on HIM as well.
"Damnit, HIM, do you have any fucking idea what you're doing?" Bubbles sternly asked.
"Oh, of course I have an idea on what I'm doing, girls! I'm just…." HIM responded in his feminine falsetto voice. "FUCKING SHIT UP!" He finished in his evil demonic masculine voice.
"Well, we'll be the ones to fuck YOU up!" Buttercup said as all three girls once again went on the attack.
But HIM, like usual, was able to dodge the girls' every last blow while countering with his own blows, sending them splashing into the lake again. HIM was about a hop, skip, and a jump away from the rock when Bubbles got in a clean and hard hit, sending HIM deep into the lake just as Blossom and Buttercup came out of the lake and made it to their destination. HIM tried a last desperate attempt at an attack, swinging a punch towards Blossom. Blossom ducked it, and HIM's momentum made him shatter the rock on the pedestal.
"Haha, oops!" Blossom said with a smirk on her face.
"Foiled you again, HIM! Now fucking what?!" Buttercup said triumphantly.
"SHIT!" HIM then shouted in his evil demonic masculine voice. "You bitches may have won this fucking time, but you know I'll be back! And the next time we meet, I guarantee you your very timely death! Enjoy your lucky fucking win now, but until we meet again!"
A large cloud of smoke appeared around HIM, the demon disappearing when it all cleared up.
"See ya! Wouldn't wanna be ya!" Bubbles said as all three girls waved goodbye.
A day later, the girls found themselves in another battle, and they were being endlessly swarmed by small purple monsters of an unknown species. The girls were easily able to fight them all off, but they kept coming almost infinitely. They even tried techniques that would get rid of a mass amount of them, but they still kept coming and coming. Even as the girls were in flight, the small purple monsters were still swarming them like bees on honey.
"FUCK! These fucking things are getting on my fucking nerves!" Buttercup shouted angrily.
"Just where the fuck are these things coming from?" Bubbles then asked as all three girls looked around for the source.
"Girls, look!" Blossom said as she pointed ahead. "I think I see the source! Follow me and beat as many of these Barney purple fuckers as you can!"
Blossom's source would ultimately be correct as it was off in the woods just outside of Townsville. And at the source stood a much larger purple creature. He was a bit of an introvert but was highly protective of his property, had an extremely short fuse around others, and had a mean streak that almost no one wanted to see. He was known as Fuzzy Lumpkins, a deeply hillbilly creature with the accent to match.
Fuzzy had a surprisingly well-built machine at his place which spit out all of the small purple creatures that he called Fuzzies.
"Dey all wuz sayin' dat I can't rule no world, huh?!" Fuzzy shouted. "Well, just wut da fugg dey gon say now?! And wit muh Fuzzy mah-chine, da world's gon be my prop-pa-day!"
As the girls continued to fight off the Fuzzies, the source of all of them slowly but surely started to come into view.
"Girls, Plan Red Sea." Blossom ordered before she, Bubbles, and Buttercup fought off just enough of the Fuzzies to put the plan into action.
It didn't take too long, but the girls joined their hands and feet together, sent a small wave of energy into each other, and made a motion as if they were trying to spread something apart, hence the biblical name of the plan. The energy sent the Fuzzies apart long enough for the girls to have a clear path to the source in the distance which the girls immediately saw and flew towards, the Fuzzy machine spewing out all of the Fuzzies.
"There's our fucking problem!" Buttercup said, pointing at the machine.
"Now let's solve it!" Bubbles then said as the girls made a beeline towards the machine.
But before they could get there, Fuzzy stepped in front of the machine and shot out a large missile-like projectile from what he calls his boomstick. While the girls were easily able to dodge it, they knew they had to avoid getting hit at any and all costs.
"Oh hell to da naw, Powapuff Girls!" Fuzzy yelled out. "I'm gon put da stank on ya if ya come close to my mah-chine!"
"Fuzzy, stop this bullshit…." Blossom got out before Fuzzy shot out more missiles towards the girls, all of which they easily dodged.
The missiles contained a mixture of the world's worst odors – bodily fluids from both humans and animals, decomposed bodies, vomit, rotten eggs, general body odor, other rotten food, skunk spray, raw sewage, among other stomach-churning odors. The largest ingredient in the missile was thioacetone, which was known as the worst odor in all of humanity. The missile had a formula that would permanently stick on anyone hit, and it could not be removed or masked no matter how hard anyone tried, making a person having to live with a foul odor for life and unable to be around others, as they too would smell it.
"Oh, fuck this shit!" Buttercup said as she made a beeline towards Fuzzy. "I've smelled like fucking shit before, it won't bother me!"
Fuzzy shot a missile towards Buttercup, and Buttercup made no attempt to dodge it. Just a hair before she was hit, Bubbles flew in to get her sister out of harm's way. Bubbles then bravely flew in herself towards Fuzzy, having to dodge the large barrage of missiles coming straight at her. There was one missile that she could not avoid, but she put a Fuzzy directly in front of her to take the hit, the foul odor getting into her nostrils.
"Eeeew, that fucking stinks!" Bubbles then said, but shaking her head and focusing on the task at hand.
After dodging odor-filled missiles for a few more minutes, Bubbles eventually made it to Fuzzy and delivered a hard blow to him, dislodging Fuzzy's boomstick.
"My boomstick!" Fuzzy shouted just before Bubbles used her laser eyebeams to disintegrate it.
"Fuck yeah, Bubbles!" Buttercup said with a fist pump.
"Now destroy that mother fucking machine and go hardcore on Fuzzy's ass like you did at the time with the meat gun!" Blossom then ordered to her blonde sister, which Bubbles nodded to with a smile.
Bubbles first destroyed the Fuzzy machine with Blossom and Buttercup taking care of the last remnants of Fuzzies.
"Oh shit." Fuzzy said in a sad, defeated voice.
"That's your aaaaaaasssssss, Mr. Fuzzy!" Bubbles said in almost a sing-song voice.
Bubbles alone gave Fuzzy a beatdown similar to the one he took from her many, many years ago. Blossom and Buttercup looked on as Bubbles beat up Fuzzy and giving him the usual injuries he sustained during the many beatdowns he got from the girls. The Townsville Special Tasks Force arrived shortly thereafter to take Fuzzy into custody, the girls high fiving each other after another job well done.
Proving that crime doesn't sleep, the girls were woken up that very night, or at least what was perceived as night, to some extremely loud noises outside. The noises consisted of a combination of loud music, nonstop swearing, things getting broken or set on fire, among many other loud noises.
"Fuck, just what the fuck is all that noise outside? I can't fucking sleep!" Buttercup said as all three girls looked out the window.
"Looks like some sort of fucking riot, but for what?" Bubbles suspected.
"I don't know, but we better put an end to it, and fast!" Blossom said, all three girls quickly changing into their normal clothes before flying right into the heart of Townsville.
The girls spotted many different creatures of the night, ranging from skeletons, vampires, pumpkin heads, witches, among many other different types of monsters. And at the center of them all was the creature that haunted every child's thoughts. He was a household name long before horror icons became famous or infamous, depending on the side of the spectrum one was on. He was simply known as the Boogie Man.
As the Boogie Man was giving high fives and fist bumps to the many members of the crowd, the girls looked down at him in total disbelief.
"What the fuck?!" Blossom said in shock.
"Shit, it's the Boogie Man!" Bubbles said as she was visibly shaking.
"You have GOT to be MOTHER FUCKING SHITTING ME!" Buttercup said just before one of the many monsters attacked all three girls.
The girls plummeted towards Earth, sending them crashing hard onto the ground below, right in between a makeshift dance floor where the Boogie Man himself was having a good time.
"Well, well, well, what's up, bitches?" The Boogie Man greeted. "Here to fuck up my party again, eh?"
"Just how the fuck are you and your fucking creatures of the night alive?!" Blossom asked sternly, still in disbelief.
"Yeah! We sent you dark-loving mother fuckers packing!" Bubbles added.
"Well, bitches, you should know that true monsters don't die, we multiply." The Boogie Man revealed. "So come on and party with us. This is my open invitation to all of you. We ain't gotta fight no mo. It ain't like you gon' be sleepin' again."
As the Boogie Man was talking, Blossom looked up towards the sky and saw the same giant disco ball that was eclipsing the Sun. She nudged Bubbles and Buttercup with her elbows and signaled skywards, all three girls laughing and nodding.
"Party's over, assholes!" Buttercup said as she and her sisters made their way into the sky and to the large disco ball that was eclipsing the Sun.
But unlike before, the Boogie Man didn't go after them. He instead gave a sly shrug and resuming his party with the other creatures of the night, showing off some dance moves with the audience cheering him on.
"Blame it on the Boogie!" The audience cheered as they danced along.
In the meantime, the girls made their way into space and to the giant disco ball that eclipsed the Sun. There wasn't anything different about it, meaning the girls could destroy it easily.
"Wow, has Boogie Dick not learned anything from last time?" Buttercup asked with a laugh as the girls flew towards the core.
"Apparently not, but who's complaining? That works for us!" Blossom answered with a shrug. "So Bubbles, care to do the honors like last time?"
"Fo sho!" Bubbles replied in a faux ebonic accent to which all three girls laughed at.
Bubbles shot a shot of her laser eyebeams towards the core of the disco ball, which immediately destroyed the entire sphere upon impact. The girls even gave a small wave up to the International Space Station, the members inside waving back at them.
"There!" Bubbles said as she dusted off her palms. "Let there be light!"
"Now back to bed we go! We got fucking school in a few hours." Blossom said as all three girls flew back to Earth.
When the girls made it back, they got a huge shock. All of the monsters, including the Boogie Man himself, were still roaming the streets and partying without a care in the world despite total sunshine. The girls looked around in complete and utter disbelief, their jaws hanging open for a minute or two as they were scratching their heads, literally and figuratively.
"WHAT! THE! ACTUAL! FUCK?!" Buttercup shouted.
"No, no, no, no, no, no, no, this isn't fucking happening." Blossom said in denial. "Maybe we're fucking dreaming and we just need to wake up."
"Welcome back, bitches!" The Boogie Man said. "Now do you wanna party with us? It'll only last, hmmm, a few million years!" The Boogie Man added with an evil laugh.
"You CANNOT still be here now! It's broad daylight! You are NOT immune to light!" Blossom said as she was still in denial.
"You see, I knew for a fact you bitches were gonna fuck my party up, so I had my main man Jerome here give us all special cloaking devices." The Boogie Man revealed. "And while you all still see the light, I still see darkness. And soon, we're gonna make the world one big dance floor!"
"This is fucking bullshit!" Blossom said angrily.
"Damnit, looks like he HAS learned something from last time, girls." Bubbles said sadly.
"So once again, I extend my open invitation to the three of you." The Boogie Man once again offered. "Let's all get fucked up!"
"Well, girls, I'm afraid there's only one alternative." Blossom said with a deflated sigh. "And that's to…."
"Kick mother fucking monster mother fucking ass!" Buttercup shouted out, interrupting Blossom, flying in to start attacking random monsters.
"Shit, Buttercup, no!" Blossom shouted before she and Bubbles were hit by monsters, forcing them to fight back.
The girls were far, far outnumbered by the thousands of different monsters swarming them, and for every blow the girls landed, the monsters exceeded. The Boogie Man himself got in several blows on the girls as the crowd cheered on, and he was even showing off some dance moves during his many attacks.
"Blame it on the Boogie!" The audience cheered on as all the monsters fought the girls.
Flying even proved to be futile as the several monsters who had flight abilities were able to send the girls crashing down to Earth. The girls had no breathing room whatsoever, but they fought off what monsters they could while taking a beating in the process.
The Boogie Man delivered Blossom a blow that sent her hurtling several hundred feet away past Bubbles and Buttercup and crash landing into a tall apartment building.
"Blossom!" Bubbles and Buttercup shouted.
"Man, you bitches are like cockroaches." The Boogie Man said, annoyed. "We keep squishing and you keep coming back."
"Oh, don't get me fucking started on cockroaches, Boogie Dick!" Buttercup angrily said.
"Now shall we party, or shall we just keep kicking your fucking asses?!" The Boogie Man asked as Bubbles and Buttercup looked around at their monstrous surroundings.
"Shit, this is fucking hopeless!" Buttercup said.
"Damnit, there just has to be a way!" Bubbles then said.
In the meantime, Blossom came to inside of a random bedroom where a terrified husband, wife, and three children were all in. She had to regain her equilibrium a bit, and when she did, she took a look at the petrified family.
"It's Blossom!" The wife said.
"Blossom! Under the bed! Monsters!" The youngest boy said.
"Under the bed?" Blossom questioned as she looked underneath the bed.
And what she saw was near total darkness, but there was a small portal visible in the distance.
"Bingo!" Blossom said, looking around for a second to find a way to relay the info to her sisters. "Excuse me, citizens, but by any chance do you have a megaphone?" Blossom them asked.
"Closet! Top shelf!" The scared husband responded just as Blossom grabbed the megaphone and turned the volume to its max.
"Thank you, citizens! Just hang in there, we'll put an end to this very soon!" Blossom said as she flew out of the window and high above the action.
"Bubbles! Buttercup! Find a bed! Any bed! Go under it and let's put a fucking end to this fucking bullshit!" Blossom said over the megaphone, knowing that with the girls' super hearing, they heard every word Blossom said.
"Fuck yeah! Just what I needed to hear!" Buttercup said.
"You got that fucking right, let's go!" Bubbles added.
"SHIT! Boogie, they know!" Jerome said just as Bubbles and Buttercup sped away when the monsters let their guard down.
"Oh hell naw! To the naw naw naw, bitches!" The Boogie Man said angrily. "You ain't fucking this one up! Everybody after them!" The Boogie Man then ordered.
Bubbles and Buttercup found the nearest bed and went into the portal underneath it, joining Blossom in an extremely dark, very scary place, where Blossom already had on the only source of light they had, in which she used her eyes as headlights.
"Shit, it's dark!" Bubbles said in a worried tone.
"Gives me the fucking creeps too!" Buttercup added also in a worried tone.
"Girls, I'm scared shitless too, but we can't chickenshit now." Blossom said. "Let's find…." Blossom managed to add before the Boogie Man and the rest of his monsters started attacking the girls, who had to fight back and speed away.
For several minutes, the girls fought the monsters and the Boogie Man himself while at the same time trying to keep Blossom's light source on. While it was still pitch black inside of the place, there were brief bursts of light from ghosts and other creatures appearing out of nowhere, startling the girls and making them scream. The girls eventually created plenty of distance from the Boogie Man and company, speeding off and leaving their pursuers behind.
In the distance was a glass-looking suit that had a bit of a glow on it. The girls were closing in on it quickly, but the Boogie Man shot a laser beam that managed to hit Blossom and Buttercup but missed Bubbles. It froze Blossom and Buttercup in a Matrix-like cloak, and when Bubbles looked back, she realized that her sisters weren't with her.
"Shit! Blossom! Buttercup!" Bubbles said worriedly.
She also began to cry in fear, but she very quickly shook it off.
"NO! Fuck that! I will NOT cry! You can do this, Bubbles!" Bubbles said with determination as she made a beeline towards the glass-like suit.
"Not on my fucking watch, bitch!" The Boogie Man said as he shot several more lasers at Bubbles, which were quickly gaining on her.
Bubbles was still a good ways away from the suit, and she knew she wasn't going to make it in time before getting hit by the laser. So Bubbles thought quickly and used her unique sonic scream power, which was more than enough to shatter the glass suit, which in turn not only shone light on the otherwise dark place, but it freed Blossom and Buttercup from their frozen prison and, most of all, it broke the cloak on all of the monsters, making them vulnerable to all light sources again.
All monsters, including the Boogie Man, all dissipated, though the Boogie Man had just enough strength for some last words.
"Fuck you bitches! I'll be back! I will remember this!" The Boogie Man got out as Bubbles went to join her sisters.
"Remember it, write it down, take a picture, we don't give a fuck!" Blossom said as the three girls got out a laugh before they exited the portal and reappearing in the real world, many monsters dissipating outside as well.
The girls made the short flight back to their home and up to their room right away, panting and breathing hard in a mix of fear, fatigue, and relief.
"Shit, that was intense!" Buttercup said.
"Damnit, I'm glad that fucking nightmare is over." Bubbles then added.
"Truer words will never be spoken, Bubbles. Now let's get some fucking sleep. Looks like we'll miss school today." Blossom then said as the girls jumped right in their bed in their normal clothing instead of their night clothing, another job well done.
Throughout the next several days and weeks, The Powerpuff Girls fought crime all over Townsville. The battles ranged from normal, everyday crooks trying to rob banks, shoplift, or doing other various crimes to the girls fighting monsters of various forms, ranging from the Giant Fish Balloon to evil eyes to three-headed dragons, among many other monstrous battles.
The would-be bank robbers or other crooks never stood a chance against the kindergarten-aged superheroes, even when they were armed with heavy artillery. The girls sometimes showed off and toyed with the criminals, but most of them received a swift beatdown before being taken away. The monsters, however, were a totally different story. Some monsters were fairly easy to beat, while others had to have their weak points discovered, which the girls exploited and sent them packing.
The girls had very little time to relax and rest up most days, even being called on to fight crime in the middle of the night. But it was just another day in the office for Blossom, Bubbles, and Buttercup, saving the world before (and even after) bedtime.
END OF CHAPTER FIVE
Music Credits
Song Artist/Source: Killer Instinct 2
Song Title/Source: Gargos Theme (Cursed Lemon Cover)
Year Song Released: 1996 (Original), 2016 (Cover)
When Played: During the battle with HIM.
Song Artist/Source: The Angry Video Game Nerd Adventures
Song Title/Source: Final Boss Battle
Year Song Released: 2013
When Played: During the battle with Fuzzy Lumpkins.
Song Artist/Source: Whodini
Song Title/Source: Freaks Come Out At Night
Year Song Released: 1984
When Played: At the first part during the battle with The Boogie Man, before the girls destroy the disco ball.
Song Artist/Source: KC and the Sunshine Band
Song Title/Source: I'm Your Boogie Man
Year Song Released: 1977
When Played: At the second part during the battle with The Boogie Man, after the girls destroy the disco ball.
Song Artist/Source: A Nightmare On Elm Street
Song Title/Source: Run Nancy
Year Song Released: 1984
When Played: At the final part during the battle with the Boogie Man, during the chase scene in the dark area underneath the bed.
Song Artist/Source: Shonen Knife
Song Title/Source: Buttercup (I'm A Super Girl)
Year Song Released: 2000
When Played: During the montage where the girls fight criminals and monsters at the end.