Chapter Twenty-One: Polly Purebred Isn't So Sweet Anymore

The elimination of Polly Purebred's de facto "Sweet" prefix was on full display, Capitol City's ace reporter looking all over Temple Island for Townsville's ace reporter, Stanley Whitfield. Polly powerwalked all over the island and looked for Stanley, an angry scowl on her face and mumbling all kinds of obscenities. Polly had to dodge all of the mayhem of residents, law enforcement, armed forces, and media all over the island, many of which were on the job doing whatever duty they were called onto Temple Island for. But despite Polly's angry mood at the time, she made sure not to interrupt any of the broadcasting that the news stations were doing, following an unwritten rule in the news industry.

After just a few minutes of searching, Polly eventually found Stanley, who had just finished having a full meal on a bench which another Temple Island resident, Atreus's father, Kratos, had cooked for him. Polly immediately made a beeline for Stanley, not even taking a moment to take a deep breath.

"Hi, Stanley Whitfield?" Polly inquired as she crossed her arms, putting a faux smile on her face.

"Yes?" Stanley answered back to Polly.

"Polly Purebred, Capitol City News. Pleasure to meet you." Polly said sarcastically.

"Pleasure is all mine, Ms. Purebred." Stanley said as he extended a hand to Polly, which Polly shook.

"Now that we've met…." Polly said as she angrily slammed her hands on the table near Stanley, that faux smile immediately being wiped off of her face. "….the DISPLEASURE is all fucking yours!" Polly then shouted.

Stanley threw his head back in shock, surprised by the sudden change in Polly's tone.

"Um, Ms. Purebred, what did I do that has gotten you so angry with me?" Stanley inquired.

"Tell me just why in the actual fuck you went on national fucking TV and make baseless ass, unfounded ass statements about that flying dog!" Polly angrily inquired.

Before Stanley could get out a single syllable to respond, Polly put a finger to her lips in the shush signal.

"I know that flying dog very, very well! He is Underdog, the superhero of all fucking superheroes, and anybody that anyone can put against him, he'd hand them their fucking asses on a gold-plated platter!" Polly continued. "Underdog would NEVER, EVER work for anyone evil nor is he evil himself! He WAS here to stop two evil assholes, Simon Bar Sinister and Cad Lackey, from getting the fucking jewelry!"

"Okay, Ms. Purebred, you are being totally unreasonable and unprofessional with the foul and vulgar language you are using towards me." Stanley said.

"Are you some fucking rookie or something, dickwad?" Polly inquired.

"For your information, Ms. Purebred, I have been in this business for two and a half decades, and I bet I can teach you a thing or two." Stanley retorted. "I am far, far from a rookie. In fact, I am recognized as a mentor by the highest and most prestigious journalism and media organizations all over the world."

Polly could only let out a long, confident, and hysterical laugh at Stanley's response before that angry scowl went back on her face. Residents and media members looked over at the confrontation, some media members even pulling out their cell phones to record the incident.

"Can't teach me shit, you fucking turd burglar. I've been doing this shit since I was 18, and I'm 53 now, you son of a bitch!" Polly mentioned. "It is I who can teach YOU a thing or two, and I too am recognized as a mentor by those same journalism and media organizations, probably even before you even started fucking doing this! It's time I give you a free fucking lesson. You of all people should fucking know you DO FUCKING NOT report gossip or hearsay on the mother fucking news! That is a cardinal fucking sin in the industry. Touche, pussycat!"

Stanley could only let out a small little scoff and just shook his head, trying to shake off the ownage that Polly was putting on him.

"You know, Ms. Purebred, it's quite humorous that you mention superheroes. We at Townsville have our own superheroes." Stanley said to somewhat change the subject. "I am sure you've heard of them, The Powerpuff Girls. And if your Underdog were to square off against them, his chances of actually winning are absolute zero." Stanley finished, using the zero signal and putting it to his eye. "Quite the fitting name, considering your Underdog would truly be the underdog in such a case. Now like I said on the air, it was mere speculation, so I already covered my butt for the gossip or hearsay stuff you mentioned. I apologize if I have ruffled your feathers that much." Stanley finished.

"Oh, so you wanna talk shit, huh, mother fucker?!" Polly said. "First of all, never heard of them. Second of all, you smartass, speculation is a huge no-no in the industry. We are the mother fucking news, we report on 100% facts! Next time, investigate and get the bare fucking facts before you go on national fucking TV and slander someone you like did! Who knows, the wrong words could've slipped out of your fucking mouth and you'll send the fucking United States into DEFCON 1!"

"All right, Ms. Purebred, enough is enough!" Stanley said as he stood up with obvious agitation on his face, getting right into Polly's face. "I suggest you get the heck out of my personal space or I will be forced to use physical force upon you." Stanley then warned. "Trust me, Ms. Purebred, this IS NOT what you want. You are dealing with a sixth-degree black belt in Taekwondo here, so turn around and leave now."

"Oh, is that shit supposed to scare me, you mother fucking fudge packer?" Polly angrily got out, unintimidated. "Let's see you fucking try that kung-fu shit on me!"

Polly began to ball up her fists, she and Stanley having a massive staredown. Before the dam could break, Temple Island's police force stepped in between them both just seconds before a physical altercation could take place.

"Hey, hey, what gives here?" One police officer asked.

"Officer, this lady came up to me and just cussed me out and accusing me of slander." Stanley answered. "I tried to diffuse the situation as best as I could, but she would not let up!"

"You DID fucking slander Underdog's good name, you fucking bastard!" Polly countered.

"Okay, ma'am, you have done enough here. Return to your trailer immediately." Another officer ordered.

The second officer moved Polly away from Stanley, but Polly, as a final send off, gave Stanley double middle fingers before she stormed off back in the direction of her trailer. She of course had to weave her way through the mass chaos and traffic on the island with figurative steam coming out of her ears. Stanley had to try to shake off the verbal vitriol he got from a fellow reporter. Other media members that witnessed the confrontation were split, some agreeing with Polly while some took Stanley's side.

"Sheesh, if that city is anything like that woman, I would not to visit that place anytime soon." Stanley said as he sat back down.

Polly Purebred eventually made it back to her trailer, slamming her door as she stepped back inside. She took a few minutes to have a phone conversation with her boss, O.J. Skweez, about her confrontation with Stanley, telling him about the entire incident and admitted that she used her colorful language towards him. O.J. Skweez of course defended her and took her side as he too was angry that Stanley made those baseless claims about Underdog. After O.J. encouraged Polly to keep doing that and being the awesome reporter that she was, they talked about unrelated things for a moment before the conversation ended. Polly, however, was still pretty irate.

"That fucking cocksucking asshole had the mother fucking NERVES to defend the bullshit he just did and even threatened to harm me?!" Polly shouted out. "Damnit, Underdog, where are you when I need you?!"

Polly cleared her throat and began to sing a version of a popular children's song, a song that she sang for many, many years as the damsel in distress.

"Oh where oh where has my Underdog gone? Oh where oh where has he gone?" Polly sang. "Oh where oh where has my Underdog gone? Oh where oh where can be be?" She further sang.

Polly sang those same lines over and over in hopes Underdog's super hearing could pick it up no matter where he was.

END OF CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

Music Credits

Song Artist/Source: Missy Elliott
Song Title/Source: She's A Bitch
Year Song Released: 1999
When Played: During the confrontation between Polly Purebred and Stanley Whitfield.