34. Rushuang's secret

While she waited for Rushuang to answer her question, Su poured out the tea. "Where is Fei Yuan?" Rushuang asked before answering Su's question.

"He's gone with Yan. Yan had to attend a military training in the camp outside the capital. Why? Did you want to talk with him? I can ask him to visit you tomorrow. They won't be back until the early evening." Su took a sip from her tea.

"No, I don't need to talk to him. I was just wondering where he was." The silence that followed was uncomfortable. Su looked up from her teacup and watched Rushuang as she picked up her cup. Su noticed Rushuang's hand wasn't completely silent. "Rushuang?" Su softly asked, feeling something was not right. Rushuang put her cup down and clasped her hands together, staring at them, but Su was pretty sure she didn't see them. When Rushuang started to fidget with her hands, Su became a bit alarmed. She placed her hand over Rushuangs. She had never seen Rushuang this nervous. Rushuang looked up and looked directly at Su, she seemed pale, unsure. Deciding she needed a bit more reassurance Su squeezed her hands encouragingly. Rushuang nodded, as if she had made a decision and took a breath, then she said: "I need your help." Su remained silent, letting Rushuang take the lead and decide the pace of the conversation.

"I need your help to find my brother."

"Your brother?" Su asked surprised, Rushuang had never before said anything about having any siblings. As far as Su had known Rushuang hadn't had any siblings. Rushuang had talked about her mother and father, but never had she said she'd had a brother. In response Rushuang nodded and continued: "He's my only sibling, he's older. He joined the army during the wars after the emperor died. The last communication we had was that he was going to Honggu. But we never received news of his passing. After the battle we received news that he had passed away at Honggu."

"We have the reports here. I can ask Yan to check, he did tell me there were inconsistencies. We can check ourselves if you wish." Su was already rising to retrieve the reports, but Rushuang stopped her: "There is no need." Su looked at Rushuang, reflecting that it was a relative small matter to be so anxious over. So when she saw Rushuang's face, she realized: "There is more." Rushuang nodded.

"I know his name isn't in the reports, because a year later he came to visit us. My father and I were shocked when he came through the door late at night. My mother had already died by that time. We were so grateful to see him again, but he had altered so much. He stayed a few days, but then…" Su could see tears in Rushuangs eyes and once more she squeezed her hands, taking them in both of hers. "I woke up and went to our garden, I tended it as I always did. I made breakfast, but when my father and my brother hadn't woken when breakfast was ready I went to their rooms. I went to my brother first and found his room empty. The bed hadn't been slept in. So I rushed to my father's room…I thought he was still asleep, but I couldn't rouse him…He was dead."

"Oh, Rushuang." Su softly said, stroking her back. Rushuang needed some time before she could continue. Su poured her another cup of tea and came to sit next to her. She put her arm around Rushuang to comfort her. "Here drink this." Rushuang calmed down enough to continue with her story: "I didn't know what to do, so I want to the village chief. He informed the court. A coroner proclaimed my father dead by poisoning. The vial of poison was beside his bed, there was no sign of struggle. So they thought he killed himself, they tried to soften it by suggesting my father had taken it by accident. I didn't tell them my father never took medicine and hadn't been sick. My brother had been extremely careful not to have been seen by others. He said it was important that no one knew he was there. So I didn't anyone he had been there. But I always wondered why he had gone. I stayed a while but everyone looked at me with so much pity and I wanted to know what had happened to my brother, so after a while I left to try and find him. But I never did."

"Rushuang…" Su was unsure how to tell Rushuang her brother could be dead, but apparently Rushuang already understood what she was going to say because she interrupted: "I know he is not dead."

"How can you know? You haven't seen him for five years."

"Because around the time of the case of the Ghost Bride I received a package, in it was a specific herb I used to collect with my brother. Just before we left for Beirong I received another package with the same herb."

"That could indeed be a sign that he is still alive… Alright, I will help you find him. Is brother Xie already looking for him?"

"No!" Rushuang exclaimed. "No, we can't ask him or Brother Pei to help." She quickly followed up her exclamation. This took Su by surprise. "Please, you can't tell brother Pei or Beiming." Su remained silent as she thought that this could potentially put her in a difficult position. When she didn't respond Rushuang grasped her hands and looked into Su's eyes, pleading: "Please promise me you won't tell them. I need to speak to my brother first."

"But Rushuang…" Su tried again, Rushuang vehemently shook her head: "No, no. What if he really is a deserter or a murderer. I can't do that to Beiming. I need to find him first." The anxiety now made more sense to Su. "What makes you think he is either?" She asked regarding Rushuang. Rushuang sighed and kept silent for a little while before she said: "My brother said he was going to Honggu, but he wasn't enlisted in the army of Prince Qi or the army of general Zhang or the back guard of Liang Chen. He was enlisted in the army of the Marquis. I believe they were fighting west of Honggu. My brother should have been there. And as I said: he didn't want anyone to see him when he was with my father and me." Understanding why Rushuang might think her brother could have done something dishonorable, Su realized pushing her on revealing this to Beiming or Yan would be pintless. "Alright, I won't tell them for now, but if it gets to dangerous you have to tell them." Su said. Rushuang eventually nodded, but SU felt her reluctance. And there was something else in Rushuang's face that made Su suspicious that even this might not be the end of her tale. "Rushuang? Have you told me everything?"

"No, but I fear you will say we have to tell brother Pei if I tell you the last part." Sighing Su closed her eyes briefly, she didn't like where this was going. "What is it Rushuang?" she pressed again. Slowly Rushuang opened the little bag she always carried and took out a small piece of folded parchment. Handing it to Su Rushuang told her her father had been holding it in his hand when she found him. "I took it because I was afraid it might lead to my brother. I didn't recognize it." Su unfolded the parchment and there, clear as could be, was the mark of the Ghost Army. In silence Su looked at the drawing. Rushuang was right: Su wanted, no needed to tell her husband about this., but Rushuang made her promise not to tell. But surely she'd see this changed everything? "I have to tell him Rushuang." Su said, the abject horror on Rushuang's face made Su reconsider. She promised no tto tell Yan about Rushuang's brother, only to tell about her father. "I'll tell him we'll investigate your father's dead together. Yan is very busy as it is. He's been working on the Honggu files. So he won't mind us doing the investigation ourselves." Rushuang needed a little more persuading but eventually agreed to Su telling Yan about Rushuang's father. Soon after Rushuang took her leave, leaving Su to her thoughts, which were many, varied and slightly muddled, so for Su it was a small blessing that her husband returned home a little later.