Bobby and Lester's excitement about showing me the apartment is palpable. They practically carry me out of Tank's office to the fourth-floor unit. Lester uses his fob to open the door. "Hector will program your fob to include our apartments, too. We want you to feel comfortable here, Steph," Bobby says as he closes my apartment door behind him.
"Is that why Joyce threw ice water at you last night?" Lester asks.
"She was angry I captured Lonnie Anderson at Pino's yesterday. He was worth a couple of grand. Joyce had tried to catch him for a few weeks. His bond was expiring at midnight. I got him into the system before Vinnie could lose the money. Lately, it has been a feast or famine at the bonds office. Connie said Vinnie didn't have any more skips for me. Apparently, Vinnie listened to my mother and decided to force me out of the BEA business," I quietly reply as a tear drips from my eye. "I didn't know where I would work until Zip mentioned the contracts from Ranger. Honestly, I thought it was an empty job offer equivalent of a pity fuck."
"Now, where did you get that idea?" Bobby asks, gently brushing away the tears. His eyes are warm with concern.
"I'm classified as entertainment in the budget. Ranger's love doesn't come with a ring, but a condom will come in handy. He could give me a child if I want one, but commitment is off the table. I can have any part of his body I want. As I said, a pity fuck," I explain. I already told Lester about the deal and about Ranger sending me back to Morelli after our first night together. Repeating the story will make me look like a fool and piss off Lester.
"He's dead," Lester growls. "Steph, you would never be a pity fuck to me. You know I love you. When I'm ready to settle down, and if you're still single, I'll be honoured to be your man." I could almost see our future together. Lester and I are sitting on the couch, cuddling as he rocks our baby in the swing, hoping it stays asleep for a few hours. We're happy together, but I'm not in love. It's more like two close friends procreating because neither has another person in their life to share the future. The vision shifts to Zack and me. Lester is, and will always be, my best friend. I do love him, but not as a lifelong partner.
"Les, you're my best friend. I don't want to ruin our friendship by crossing the line of intimacy," I whisper. "I need you more as my friend than a lover." I'm unwilling to share how I feel about Zip.
"And that's why I would never disrespect you that way," he replies. Lester kisses my forehead before leaving my apartment with Bobby hot on his heels. I knew they would go to the gym to relieve their anger and frustration at Ranger.
A few minutes after my friends leave, I hear someone knock on my door. I open it to find Hector grinning. "Hola, hermano," I greet, stepping to the side and opening the door wider for him to come inside.
Hector crosses the threshold into my apartment and closes the door, saying, "You have access to Lester, Bobby, Zip and my apartment."
"Thanks, Hector," I reply. I kiss his teardrop tattoos. Hector pulls me towards the couch and sits with me on his lap. We cuddle until someone knocks on the door. The other Merry Men would be shocked to learn how close I am to Hector. If he weren't gay, I would have fallen in love with him. Instead, he's the brother I never had. I slide off Hector's lap to greet my guest.
"You signed the contract?" Zip asks after stepping inside and closing the door.
"Yup. The one for full-time," I reply. Zip hugs me before gently kissing me. Hector grins and tells Zip that I have access to his apartment. He smiles, glad I could visit him whenever the mood strikes, which leads me to his room across the hall.
I cuddle back onto Hector's lap while Zip got Ghostbusters to play on my TV. Cuddling with Hector doesn't bother Zip. He isn't the jealous type, though I had to admit I am, and I would be upset if my boyfriend let another woman cuddle with him. Wait! Is Zip, I mean, Zack, my boyfriend? Zip grabs popcorn and drinks before sitting beside me on the couch. I move off Hector's lap to sit between him and Zip. Didn't anyone have to work today? Where did they get the food? It's my first time in the apartment. Did the guys anticipate me moving in today?
Zip winks at Hector, who smiles. I wonder if they planned to have me stay at Rangeman. It was strange how Hector programmed my fob to access Lester, Bobby and Zip's apartment without asking permission.
"I had their permission for whenever the situation arose," Hector whispers.
"And the food?" I ask, turning my head from side to side to see who will answer.
Zip chuckles, "Ella has the empty apartments stocked with non-perishables. If nobody moves into the unit that month, she swaps them out. She'll stock more food tomorrow."
"Is there another empty apartment?" I question.
"Nope. You're living in the only one we had available. Ranger kept it open for you," Hector explains.
"Why would he do that?" I wonder. "I'm sure someone else could have used it."
"Ranger wants you to have a safe place to live. He kept it available if you ever signed a contract to work for Rangeman," Zip says. "Are you already regretting your decision?"
"No," I reply, smiling at him. He places the bowl containing popcorn on my lap, making it easier for everyone to reach.
"Why?" Zip asks as he shoves a handful of popcorn inside his mouth. My eyes glaze over as he licks the butter off his lips.
Shaking the thoughts from my head, I reply, "I get Ella. She's providing my meals." Zip and Hector find it humorous when they realize I signed my contract after negotiating with Tank to have Ella cook my food as part of my full-time employment.
Hector moves the empty bowl off my lap, placing it on the coffee table. I rest my head on Zip's shoulder. Sometime during the movie, he put his arm around me, pulling me closer to his side.
The movie nears its end when my apartment phone rings. I furrow my brows and stand. My gut tells me something is wrong with Grandma Edna. It's never been that exact before. Usually, my spidey sense indicates imminent danger, but this time, I feel my grandmother is in trouble or hurt. As I approach the phone on shaking legs, I fear the worst. I don't want to answer the phone. "Hello?" I shakily ask when I pick up the receiver.
"Steph, it's Cal. Someone bombed your apartment," Cal sadly announces. My spidey sense indicates there's more to the incident.
"Did anything survive?" I whisper, wobbling on my legs. Zip and Hector rush to their feet and prepare to catch me if I fall. Many scenarios go through my head as I imagine my bed smoking, my shoes melting and my clothes burning.
"Would your grandmother go to your apartment?" Cal asks.
My heart pumps furiously, tapping its rhythm against my ribs. I swallow the bile, attempting to force its way up my throat. Tears slip from my eyes when I ask, "Sometimes she goes there to clean when she needs a break from my mom. Why?"
"Your grandmother was inside the apartment, standing with her back to the dining room window when the glass shattered. The shards hit her neck and shoulders," Cal explains. I feel my knees threatening to give out.
"D…d…d…did you see her?" I cry, managing to remain upright.
"I heard the call over the radio. The ambulance is taking her to St Francis Hospital," Cal replies. "I'm sorry, Steph. It doesn't look good for Edna."
Zip catches me when my legs give out, but I have the receiver in my hand, held against my ear. "I need to see her." I appreciate Zip not taking the phone to continue the conversation with Cal. He's letting me handle the news about my grandma, offering support instead.
"I'll have someone drive you," Cal replies and ends the call before I can tell him Zip or Hector will accompany me.
"Are you okay?" Zip asks, tipping up my head to look into my eyes. He strokes my cheeks, rubbing away the tears with every pass of his thumbs.
I shake my head. "Grandma was at my house. She's going to the hospital with life-threatening injuries," I cry. Zip catches another tear with the pad of his thumb. He kisses my forehead and leads me to the door, where I slip on my running shoes. We exit the apartment, and the lock automatically activates. Hector calls someone and speaks rapidly in Spanish. I can't follow his side of the conversation. He kept glancing at me, and I knew he was talking about me.
Hector opens the door for me to slide into the backseat of the Rangeman SUV. Zip sits beside me, gently nudging me to sit in the centre. I fumble with the seatbelt. Patiently, Zip removes the clip from my hand and snaps it in place.
Zip lets me get lost in my mind, thinking of every scenario involving Grandma Edna. He's giving me time to process the news. Did the glass cut a major artery? Is Grandma in pain? I imagine Grandma dying from exsanguination. I can hear Mom lamenting, "Why me," while blaming me for the incident. It isn't my fault that someone shot an explosive rocket or something through my dining room window.
"She'll pull through this," Zip whispers.
"You don't know that," I argue. "Grandma could be dead when we arrive." I'm being the glass-half-empty person lately. Things aren't going my way. Losing Grandma will break my heart and cause a larger rift between Mom and me, especially if she blames me for Grandma's death.
"Try to stay positive," Zip says. "I know it's easier said than done. I'm here for you, Steph. Whatever you need, I'll try to provide."
"Thank you," I whisper. Zip kisses my temple and pulls me closer. His warmth envelops me, keeping me from completely breaking down. I miss Ranger more than ever. He may not be boyfriend or husband material, but he is my friend. I hope Ranger's safe in whatever third-world country he's trying to save. To spare Zip's feelings, I turn my head away from him.
Zip holds my hand as I stare outside the window to my right. I don't want him to see the tears on my cheeks. "Steph, take this," Zip quietly says, passing me some tissue to wipe my nose. I turn to look at him. My eyes are swollen and red. I'm not a pretty crier. Zip uses his free hand to touch my cheek. He's holding my left hand in his, gently stroking his thumb across my knuckles. I twist my hand to entwine our fingers. It feels natural and comforting. For the first time, I'm not craving Ranger's embrace to ground me, which I find surprising. Everything I want and need in a man is beside me. Is this love?