Hey, guys! Welcome to the next chapter of, 'Helluva An Imp!'. I hope that you guys will enjoy the chapter. Also, to answer some questions of the guests, there will be an OC Chapter showing how the OCs meet the I.M.P. Gang. Unlike my Hazbin Hotel Story, there will be no harem as Lazlo will only date Loona. Also, the reason why I did Murder Family and not the Pilot is because the Pilot is considered non-canon, and it makes sense because it has two big plot holes. One, the I.M.P. Gang bringing a Human to Hell, and two, them exposing themselves on live TV, but that said, I will copy some elements of the Pilot into the chapter that I like. You will see which ones soon...anyway, I don't own anything except for my OCs as the OC Ratchet Calamity belongs entirely to 9655.
NOW LET'S GET ON WITH THE STORY!
{Helluva An Imp-Season 1, Episode 2: Loo Loo Land!}
~[Flashback: 12-Years-Ago]~
"Mummy! Daddyyyy!" A young female childish voice rang out as we cue over to Stolas's Mansion, later at night, as we cue to the master bedroom, and we see a 24-year-old Stolas and his wife sleeping in their bed as their daughter's frightened scream rang out.
"Ugh..." Stolas says while being roused from his sleep as he sits up, revealing to be naked as he turns to his wife, who has most of the blanket as Stolas frowns at her. "Mmph. Via's calling us, Stella." Stolas says as his wife mumbles in annoyance.
"You get up."
"Fine..." Stolas says with a heavy sigh while getting out of bed as he quickly puts on his long-sleeved red robe and his red bunny slippers as the Goetic Prince of Hell then makes his way out of the room and walks over to his Daughter's room as he opened the door and his tired and irritated features soften upon seeing his sobbing and terrified Daughter hiding beneath her blankets. "Via? What troubles you, my owlet?"
"Daddy! Daddy! Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!" His Daughter sobbed while climbing down from her bed and ran over to leap into her father's arms as Stolas hoisted her up to comfort her.
Resting in his arms is a 3'6-feet-tall, 5-year-old Female Avian Owl Demon with a white heart-shaped facial disk as she has a pair of eyes that have pink scleras and bright white pupils, short shaggy-styled hair with blonde tips, a small black beak, a pair of slender four-clawed arms with long black pointed fingers, slate-gray feathers, a slender build, a long plume-like slate-gray feathery tail that are a slightly darker shade than her feathers, a pair of slender four-clawed legs, and her outfit consists of a pale yellow tiara, a long-sleeved light pink dress with a pattern of white-lilac stars printed all over it and white-lilac puffed sleeves, and no shoes. Her name is Octavia, Stolas and Stella's Daughter.
"I had a dream! A really bad dream!" Octavia sobbed as Stolas yawned lightly and wiped away his daughter's tears.
"A nightmare." Stolas corrected softly.
"I was looking all over the palace, and...I couldn't find you anywhere! You weren't there!" Octavia sobbed as Stolas rubbed her back to comfort her.
"There there, Via, it's okay. You're okay." Stolas says while summoning his grimoire to him telekinetically as he walks Octavia back to bed and sits down on it. "When you're scared, and you don't know where I am, you must remember..." Stolas trailed off as his grimoire floated over to him, and he telekinetically flipped it open. "...no matter what happens to me, I will never be far away from my special little starfire," Stolas says while rubbing his beak against Octavia's beak as she giggles.
{You Will Be Okay Song}
It always seems more quiet in the dark
It always feels so stark
How silence grows under the moon
Constellations gone so soon
Stolas says while beginning to sing his lullaby to Octavia while using the grimoire to open a portal above himself and Octavia as she looks up in awe of the beauty of space through the portal and the Father and Daughter then float up through the portal and into the cosmos as they landed on a barren moon placed somewhere in space.
I used to think that I was bold
I used to think love would be fun
Now, all my stories have been told except for one
Walking across the moon, Stolas leaves behind footprints in the dust as he glances up at the cosmos before glancing down at his daughter, who looks back with her large curious eyes as he stares at her lovingly, knowing that even though his life is awful, there's one thing that Stolas can say for certain that gives him a purpose in life as an oblivious Octactia got distracted by a pink glow to the side and turned her head.
As the stars start to align
I hope you take it as a sign
That you'll be okay
Everything will be okay
A large meteor begins its descent towards a giant pink-colored star as it makes contact with the pink star and begins to sink beneath the molten surface as Stolas goes over to sit down on a rock and places Octavia on his lap.
And if the Seven Rings collapse
Although the day could be my last
You will be okay
When I'm gone, you'll be okay
Multiple planetary bodies begin gravitating toward the pink star, including the moon that Stolas and Octavia currently reside on, which eventually shatters into pieces as the star's gravity pulls on it and besides the horrible destruction placed all around them and that they could face imminent death, Octavia yawns cutely and falls asleep contentedly against her father's chest as the distant planetary bodies fly through the cosmos, pulled in by the pink star's incredible gravitational pull as they instantly disintegrate upon impact and causes the star to explode in a powerful supernova.
And when Creation goes to die
You can find me in the sky
Upon the last day
And you will be okay
Thankfully, though, the Father and Daughter can be seen already teleported back to Hell before the supernova could reach them as they arrive back at Octavia's room, and the magical purple glowing portal closes behind Stolas, causing him to sing louder as he then drapes the sleeping Octavia in a blanket and proceeds to turn around to walk away as his young daughter settles to sleep, content.
{You Will Be Okay Song Over}
~[Flashback Over]~
"I can't believe you slept with an imp, in OUR FUCKING BED!" Stolas's Wife's screeching, annoying voice rang out as we see a teenage Octavia being jolted awake by smashing objects and her parents screaming at each other as she looked far less content than her younger counterpart.
Lying before us is a teenage Octavia, which consists of her being 5'5-feet-tall and a 17-years-old Female Avian Owl Demon with a white heart-shaped facial disk as she has a pair of eyes that have pink scleras and bright white pupils as she has soft-purple eyeshadow on her eyelids, long shaggy-styled hair with bangs that reach down to her back, a small black beak, a pair of slender four-clawed arms with long white pointed fingers, D-Cup Breasts, unkempt slate-gray feathers, a short lanky build, a long plume-like slate-gray feathery tail that are a slightly darker shade than her feathers, a heart-shaped thick ass, a pair of slender four-clawed legs, and she was currently wearing her pajamas, which consisted of a long-sleeved oversized black nightshirt with a single large pink star in the center, and a pair of pink panties.
"It was unexpected! I didn't have time to go to a motel!"
"A motel?! Like a fucking PLEBEIAN?!" Stolas's Wife squawked like the little bitch she is as Octavia, annoyed at being disturbed, gives a long groan and reached over to grab her phone as she puts in earbuds, and her phone began playing, 'My World Is Burning Down Around Me' to tune out the screaming as she got out of her bed and did her morning routine before putting on her usual outfit as Octavia then strides down the halls of the Goetia estate, stepping over the smashed remains of a plant thrown in her path as she arrived in the kitchen and spotted her parents once again arguing with each other violently.
Standing before her is a 7'10-feet-tall, 36-year-old Female Avian Demon with a pair of eyes that have red scleras and light pupils and had very long curved black eyelashes with gray markings placed underneath her eyes, long hair-like feathers that have gray tips and a large gray stripe on her head, a short pink beak, A-Cup Breasts, a pair of slim four-clawed arms with painted nails, white feathers, a tall slim build, a small ass, and her outfit consists of a golden crown, a white dress with puffed sleeves and feather trimming along with black accents, and a pair of black gloves. Her name is Stella, Stolas's Wife, and Octavia's Mother.
"It's bad enough that your little Imp Fuck Toy dropped down when I was in the middle of tea time with my friends and expressing my hatred about a royal family of assassins, but you had to go and promote your little shitshow out in public instead of lying to keep face! And for what? Some Imp dick?! You want to fuck this one, TOO?!" A furious Stella asked while reaching over to grab a random Imp Servant and violently tossing him in Stolas's direction as he narrowly avoided him while wearing a feathery black tophat that featured a regal gold crown encircling it, a deep red tunic with six linked golden buttons down the breast and beige breeches, a long burgundy cape tattered at the hemline with a plush ermine-look fur collar, and a pair of long black gloves with white feathered trims at the elbows.
"No! Of course not!"
"You are a goddamn embarrassment! I'm not spending another moment looking at your pathetic, IMP-SUCKING FACE!" Stella screeched while storming out of the room, shouting angrily the entire time and smashing more potted plants as Stolas sighed in exhausted exasperation before noticing that his daughter had entered the kitchen as he smiled at her widely.
"Good mooorning, Octavia! Did you sleep well, my owlet?"
"Was that a serious question?" A deadpanned Octavia asked with a small glare while wearing her usual outfit, which consists of a black beanie hat with a pale yellow tiara design on her head, a pink choker, a long-sleeved black feathery cardigan, a long-sleeved pink dress with a pattern of pale yellow stars printed all over it underneath, black leggings, and a pair of black heeled boots.
"Mm-hmm..." Stolas says awkwardly while smiling nervously as he then goes over to open the refrigerator to retrieve a massive chunk of zebra meat. "Uh, what's that you're listening to?"
"This song is called 'My World is Burning Down Around Me'. It's by Fuck You Dad." Octavia stated bluntly as Stolas looked down, thinking the name of the band his daughter mentioned was a hurtful remark. "It's a band."
"Ohhhh! How charming..." Stolas says bemusedly while grabbing the zebra meat and feeding it to a massive potted plant situated in a small alcove off the kitchen as he pets it, and the potted planet falls dormant as it closes its three eyes.
"So, you two done screaming for the day?" Octavia asked dryly while sipping her coffee as Stella let out another scream of anger and another potted plant was heard shattering in the distance.
"Uh...you know what I haven't done in a long, loooong time? I haven't taken you to your favorite place in all of Hell. Why don't we go to Loo Loo Land?" An excited Stolas asked while making his way over to sit down next to Octavia as she looked remarkably more annoyed and angry.
"I'm not fucking five anymore, Daddy."
"Oh, but you always were so happy when I took you to Loo Loo Land. What do you say we go there again, have a day, just the two of us?" Stolas asked with a smile as Octavia blinked at him owlishly blankly.
"I'd rather kill myself."
"There we go. Anything but staying in this house. Now, I'll arrange our security." Stolas says while standing up and going over to pick up a phone carried on a platter by his now bruised and battered Imp Servant.
"Security for a theme park?" A heavily confused Octavia asked while tilting her head cutely as Stolas laughed amusedly.
"We are rich, and we're hot. People want our money and our bodies."
"Our money, maybe." An annoyed Octavia says while grabbing a box of cereal on the table and shoveling handfuls into her mouth.
"Speak for yourself, princess. Now...I'm calling the only man who can truly fuck me."
"What..." A disgusted Octavia says while dropping the handful of cereal as a blushing Stolas immediately began backpedaling.
"I mean, who can protect me-No, wait, us! Being part of the Goetia family is rather valuable, you know!" Stolas says with a small nervous laugh as Octavia groans and pulls her beanie down over her eyes as we then fast backward in time for about 20 minutes or so, and we cue over to the I.M.P building as we zoom over to a closed door labeled, 'IMP Headquarters' with a crude sign made from a sheet of notebook paper that reads, 'Meeting in progress' with a smiley face drawn next to it as we cue inside of the room and we see Blitzo walking in front a whiteboard on the wall as he lectures his employees.
"Alright. Now, I know business has been...a bit slow lately, yes. It's no one's fault, okay? I'm not naming any names here...Moxxie." Blitzo says while glancing over at Moxxie as said person gave him an incredulous look in response. "Now, does anyone have any bright ideas on how we can get business drummin' up again?"
"What about-," An excited Millie says with sparkling eyes before coughing a bit as her voice sounded oddly different. "Sorry about that, sore throat."
"Gee, I wonder why." A bemused Lazlo says while giving the young couple a teasing look as they blush.
"Nah, that can't be, Lazlo. Moxxie's dick is too small to hit the back of Millie's throat." Blitzo says dismissively as a fuming Moxxie was about to argue but was interrupted by his wife.
"Anyway, how about we do a car wash?!"
"This is Hell, Millie. No one cares about cars being clean here, okay?" An annoyed Blitzo says as he then thinks for a second. "Ooh! What about a billboard?!" Blitzo asked while waving his hands with an enthusiastic flair as sparkles flew out.
"We already did a billboard, sir," Lazlo says as Moxxie nods with an annoyed glare.
"And it failed spectacularly because you don't know how to spell or write."
"Helpful, Moxxie. Really glad you're in the room right now." A dry Blitzo says while walking over to wrap his arm over Moxxie's shoulder as his boss then immediately pushes him away. "Have you guys forgotten what service we provide?" Blitzo asked while reaching behind him to pull out a TV Remote and pressing a button on it as he turned on a nearby TV, and it showed the I.M.P. Crew brutally murdering people from the overworld as they are paid to do with Blitzo whacking a man in the face with a mallet, a grunting Moxxie being blown away firing a shotgun through the mouth of a man tied to a chair, a maliciously grinning Lazlo wrapping his two chain-sickles around a Human's body and sliced him into a billion pieces, a rabid Loona swinging a man back and forth in her mouth while biting into his neck and drawing out blood, Ratchet using his Mark 3 Lancer Assault Rifle's Chainsaw Feature to slice a Human in half, and Millie decapitates someone with a harpoon and laughs sinisterly.
"Ah, yes, good times," Ratchet says with a smirk while the gang is watching the TV as he, Lazlo, Loona, Millie, and Blitzo are eating popcorn as Moxxie looks annoyed.
"I don't need any reminding, sir. Considering you blew most of our salaries on an obnoxious TV Ad last week. One that you then additionally paid to have run on a channel that nobody watches, which was overshadowed by the Princess of Hell's Commercial about her Hazbin Hotel Project that was also overshadowed by the 666 News about the latest update of Extermination Day." A deadpanned Moxxie says as Blitzo scoffed and rolled his eyes.
"Nobody fucking cares about Extermination Day or the Princess's stupid little idea, Moxxie."
"I do." Lazlo pointed out as Blitzo rolled his eyes again.
"Yes, yes, that's why you took our past client there to be 'Rehabilitated' or whatever, but that's not important to us right now, so shut the fuck up."
"Hey, did anyone notice that Katie Killjoy briefly sounded like Blitzo during the breaking news?" Ratchet asked as Lazlo perked up.
"Oh, I did, I thought it was the weirdest thing."
"Ditto," Blitzo says while nodding in agreement as he then turns to glare at Moxxie. "Anyway, seriously, Mox? What's 'obnoxious; about a super-fun jingle, alright? It's a fun distraction when an advertisement's spittin' bullshit."
"People love musicals, sir," Millie added cheerfully as Blitzo nodded.
"Exactly, Millie, and we're basically living in a real-life musical. Are you gonna crush my musical theatre dreams like my Dad did?" Blitzo asked Moxxie with teary eyes as he sighed heavily.
"Sir-,"
"Because, right now? All I see is just my Dad's asshole talking to me! Crushing my dreams of being who I truly am inside!"
"Are you tryin' to crush his dreams, Moxxie?" Millie asked Moxxie with a flirtatious tone as he did a double take.
"I-What?"
"I thought I knew you," Millie says while playfully sticking her tongue out at him and curving her tail into the shape of a heart as Moxxie blushes and rolls his eyes affectionately.
"I can't believe you, Moxxie! After I made you employee of the month!" Blitzo screamed while tearfully holding up an employee of the month plaque with Moxxie's picture on it.
"Wait, what? Why is Moxxie Employee of the Month? I thought I was Employee of the Month." An annoyed Lazlo asked while pointing over at his Employee of the Month Plaque planted on the wall.
"Yes, you are, of this month, Lazlo, not the next one." Blitzo pointed out as Lazlo fumed.
"Motherfucker, how can Moxxie be an employee of the next month when said month hasn't even started yet?!"
"I don't know, Lazlo, I just wanted to guilt trip, Moxxie! You don't have to bite my head off!"
"Okay, okay, everyone calm down!" Moxxie screamed as he sighed heavily and rubbed his head to soothe his headache. "Okay, sir, I'm sorry; a commercial jingle is not comparable to musical theatre. Nobody actually likes the jingles."
"I liked it."
"Me too."
"Me three."
"Ditto." Millie, Lazlo, Ratchet, and Loona said in unison as Moxxie's left eye twitched in annoyance and groaned as he facepalmed.
[I.M.P. Commercial Jingle]
"Hi, there! I'm Blitzo! The 'o' is silent, and I'm the founder of I.M.P.!" Blitzo says while gesturing to the logo as it appears on the screen and then disappears. "Are you a piece of shit that got yourself sent to Hell, or are you an innocent soul who got FUCKED over by someone else?!" Blitzo asked with two pictures of him appearing in different scenarios as the first shows him wearing two top hats through his horns, a monocle, and twiddling a fake mustache while standing outside of a burning building with a sign that reads, 'Orphanage for Elderly Blind Newborn Dogs' appears as the second shows Blitzo wearing an angel costume at a coffeehouse happily throwing an empty coffee cup in a trash can instead of the recycling bin right next to it.
"After lovingly killing my wife for fucking the delivery man you can imagine my surprise when I wound up here after the state of Ohio killed me." A Demon Guy says while wearing an Ohio sports jersey as the commercial cuts to him giving a testimonial while Blitzo holds a cardboard sign in the frame that reads, 'Some guy who hired us!'. "I really wish I could stick it to that yappy jogger who saw me hiding the body!"
"Well, luckily for you," Blitzo says while speaking to the camera and holding Stolas's Grimoire as Moxxie and Millie can be seen drawing in a large pentagram on the floor with the help of some chalk as their boss narrows his eyes and makes a magical gesture with his hand as the pentagram glows red and a glowing red dimensional portal to the Human World appeared as the young couple backed away from it in surprise. "Thanks to our company's special access to the living world, we can help you take care of your unfinished business by taking out anyone who screwed you over when you were alive!" Blitzo screamed while tossing away Stolas's Grimoire as he then walked over to the portal and fell backwards into it as he was warped away.
When you want somebody gone,
And you don't want to wait too long,
Call the Immediate Murder Professionals!
A random person sings as the scene then transitions to a person with their arms crossed, and a thought bubble appears depicting another person being crossed out as the commercial jingle plays in the background, and a dead body suddenly falls near the person as they notice and look up to see the I.M.P. Crew showing inside of their logo as Blitzo holds his arms out with a sinister grin on his face, a smirking Lazlo spun around his chain-sickle, a glaring Moxxie holds up his rifle, a maliciously smiling Millie holds up her spear, and a scowling Ratchet gripped his Mark 3 Lancer Assault Rifle tightly.
Hand grenade or cyanide,
We'll make it look like suicide,
The Immediate Murder Professionals!
The I.M.P. Crew could be seen inside their building, and a grunting Moxxie threw a grenade out the window as the group quickly covered their ears and an explosion went off as a severed arm went flying, and a devilishly grinning Blitzo and Lazlo could be seen working together to hang a Human with the help of some rope as Moxxie was keeping an eye out and Ratchet and Millie finishes writing a suicide note as the screen then showed a manically laughing Blitzo electrocuting someone, a sinisterly grinning Lazlo slamming someone's head into a wall hard enough that it blew up into billion pieces, a sly smirking Ratchet pushing someone off a roof, an evilly giggling Millie hitting someone on the head with a mace, and a glaring Moxxie is shown strangling someone to death.
We do our job so well,
Because we come straight out from Hell!
We'll kill your husband or your wife,
We'll even let you keep the knife!
The I.M.P. Logo can be seen spinning around quickly as the scene then transitions to Blitzo creating a dimensional portal to the living world in a wall while he and the others wore their poorly made Human Disguises while Lazlo and Rather conjured up their Human Disguises as they ran through the dimensional portal and come up through the other end of the portal and adjust themselves as the I.M.P. Crew suddenly look shocked and winced as it appears that they have accidentally teleported to a church in the middle of a service and a female preacher and the congregation look back at the Disguised Demons in confusion and/or fear as one bearded man, however, has his head laid back as he sleeps with earbuds in and we then see Millie struggling to remove a knife from a naked couple who are in a 69 position while Moxxie tries to look away as Lazlo and Ratchet were trying to remove the naked couple as we also see Blitzo stabbing someone tied to a chair repeatedly in the head while sporting a goofy expression.
We're the Immediaaaaate...Murderrrrrr...Professionals!
Kids die for freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
A quick sequence then shows the I.M.P. Crew assassinating their targets in numerous horrific ways, such as with a medieval torture chamber, riding a shark, burning someone alive, suffocating someone with a pillow, playing on a grand piano after it crushed someone, and using an electric chair as, in the final scene, Lazlo and the others could be seen hiding in a bush in a park as Moxxie is about to shoot a blonde woman looking at her phone from behind, but accidentally shoots a boy passing by eating an ice cream cone as Lazlo and the others looked comically shocked while Moxxie was traumatized as a still shot of the I.M.P. Logo appeared in front of the viewers.
[I.M.P. Commercial Jingle Over]
"Okay, I like to go on record and say that incident was Loona's fault." A glaring and huffing Moxxie says as he was thankful that kid was able to survive getting shot due to the bullet going through his body and not hitting any vital organs. "Dispatch is supposed to give us the right info on the target. It's very simple." Moxxie says while pointing over at Loona, who has her feet up and is watching a video on her phone of Moxxie getting hurt.
"Oh, sit on a dick, Moxxie."
"YOU sit! Sit on...a...and the...d-DO YOUR JOB!" Moxxie snapped with a glare as an equally glaring Blitzo walked over to hug and nuzzle Loona as said person snarled at him in response.
"Hey, now. We don't blame our screwups on Loona, okay?! She didn't do anything wrooooong~,"
"...Are you kidding me, sir? She's awful!" Moxxie screamed as he began listing off all of her screw-ups. "First, my Wife was stabbed while on a solo mission with Lazlo and called for help and yet she hung up without bothering to call me! She only responded back when Lazlo called her! Second, she aggressively shoved your Happy Adoption Gift down your throat and only calmed down when Lazlo showed up to give her a gift! Third, she faxed me an ad for weight loss, thinking that I'm fat-,"
"You are."
"I'm not!" An embarrassed Moxxie screamed as he glared at a disinterested Loona. "And only fessed up to her stupid prank when Lazlo forced her to! Fourth, she ate my freaking lunch to try and soothe her hangover and when my wife calmly asked why she drinks on a work night, she proceeds to throw a temper tantrum and began attacking us and only stopped when Lazlo offered a different solution to her hangover! Fifth, she took a shit on Ratchet's car! Just fucking cause apparently by her, and only own up to her mistake when Lazlo forced her to clean it! You know what this all means, sir?"
"That Lazlo earned next month's, 'Employee of the Month' due to being so loyal and helpful to my daughter," Blitzo said while giving Lazlo a thumbs up as he did the same and winked over at Loona as said person blushed and smiled as her tail wagged happily under the table.
"NO! IT MEANS THAT LOONA IS LITERALLY THE WORST RECEPTIONIST EVER AND THAT SHE IS A TOTAL BITCH TO EVERYONE EXCEPT FOR LAZLO BECAUSE SHE IS A BIG CRUSH ON HIM!"
"NO, I DON'T! SHUT THE FUCK UP, MOXXIE!" Loona snarled angrily while baring her teeth as she looked away from Lazlo in embarrassment and anger.
"Look, the point is, Loona is a valued member of our family, and we don't get rid of family," Blitzo says with a stern tone as Loona briefly smiles, touched by Blitzo's words as Ratchet blinked in surprise.
"Huh, that's surprisingly sweet," Ratchet says with a smile Moxxie rolls his eyes with a scoff.
"Oh, please, we aren't a family, sir! You are the boss! We are the employees! You treat her like she's some troubled teenager, when in reality, she's more like a meth-addicted homeless woman you let man the phones!" Moxxie ranted with Ratchet laughing amusedly as a scowling Loona flipped Moxxie off.
"Hey! That is offensive! Without homeless people, I wouldn't have HALF the joy and laughter I do in this life!" Blitzo screamed with a glare while going over to the window to see a homeless Imp Demon lying on the ground, looking sad and holding up a sign that reads, 'Monee helps. Satan bless' as he lost his home due to Adam destroying it in the middle of his rampage during Extermination Day, and a Succubus can be seen on her cellphone as she turns away from the hobo and Blitzo smugly waves at him before lowering the window blinds.
"While we're on the subject of 'family' can you stop finding me and Millie outside of work?" Moxxie asked with an annoyed tone as a surprised Lazlo turned to him.
"Wait, he tries to do that to you, too?"
"Try? More like does." A growling Moxxie says as a worried Millie turns to him.
"Come on, sweetie! It's not that big a deal." Millie says dismissively with a glass-shattering noise playing out as Moxxie makes a stocked face.
"Excuse me...WHAT?!"
~[Moxxie's Flashback #1]~
"Honey, can you get me the butter?" Moxxie asked sweetly while he and Millie were preparing dinner in their kitchen as his wife nodded.
"Sure, sweetie," Millie says while going over to open the fridge door and is surprised to see Blitzo inside as he hands her the gross, viscous butter.
"Spoiler alert: the butter's spoiled," Blitzo says as Millie giggles.
"What's funny, honey?" Moxxie asked with a soft smile while throwing the diced carrots into the soup as he whirled around and was flabbergasted to see his boss inside their fridge.
"Really impressive wordplay."
"WHAT THE-?! WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU IN OUR FRIDGE?!"
~[Moxxie's Flashback #2]~
Later that evening, we cue over to the young couple's apartment building as we see Moxxie and Millie sleeping in the bed as the latter is tossing and turning as the sound of a cat purring can be heard, and Moxxie sleepily opens his eyes as he was stunned to see Blitzo standing on him, looking him right in the eyes as his tail wagged around happily in the background.
"Whatcha dreamin' about?"
"...I was dreaming about my Mom being murdered, but now...I'd like to go back to that."
~[Moxxie's Flashback #3]~
"Of all the imps in Hell, it's for her that I fell~," Moxxie sang as we see him singing the end of 'Oh, Millie' on the couch with his wife as Millie joined in on some parts.
"It's for him that I fell~,"
"Oh, Millie~," Moxxie says with a lovestruck look as he and Millie closed their eyes and leaned over to share a kiss, but the Male Imp notices Blitzo outside the window holding a camcorder as he gets pissed off.
"Are you fucking filming us right now?!"
~[Flashback Over]~
"Man, I feel sorry for you two. I was always able to find Blitzo trying to follow after me in order to find out where I live." Lazlo says with a sympathetic look as Blitzo scoffed and rolled his eyes as he crossed his arms.
"Oh, please, don't remind me."
~[Lazlo's Flashback #1]~
A humming Lazlo can be seen making his way out of the I.M.P. Building as he was planning to head back home, but paused a bit as he narrowed his eyes and flicked his tail around as he sent it over to a nearby alleyway and slammed it against a hidden Blitzo directly into the balls as he screamed in pain and crashed down into the ground as the Male Imp groaned in misery.
~[Lazlo's Flashback #2]~
Placing his hands in his pockets, Lazlo walked through the streets of Imp City with his hands closed as he suddenly paused a bit and whirled around to toss his chain-sickle as it flew through the air and wrapped around a surprised Blitzo, who was standing on top of a roof of a random building with binoculars in his hands as Lazlo proceeds to yank his weapon downwards and sends his screaming boss crashing down into the ground, hard enough that it cracked as Blitzo moaned in pain.
~[Lazlo's Flashback #3]~
"So, handsome, care to take me to your apartment and have some fun?" A sexy Sucubus asked while lying on Lazlo's back in a piggyback as he carried her out of a random bar and smushed her large breasts against his back as the Male Imp grinned slyly but then deadpanned a bit as he spotted Blitzo hiding behind a lamp post with a camcorder in his hands as Lazlo and the Succubus eyed him oddly.
"...Are you two up for a threeway?"
~[Flashback Over]~
"Ugh, I don't know why you won't tell us where you live, Lazlo. You act as if I'm going to sneak into your home almost every day to spy on you and intrude on your life. What kind of person do you think I am?" Blitzo asked with an offended tone as an unimpressed Lazlo gestured over at an angry Moxxie as he glared at his boss.
"Just...stop...breaking into our houses...and...stalking...us..."
"I don't see what the issue is. There somethin' you don't want me seein'?" Blitzo asked with a sly grin as Moxxie's left eye twitched in anger, and Lazlo and Loona snickered a bit as Ratchet laughed.
"No!"
"You a baby-wiener-haver?"
"Hey, you know, we can have Millie verify if he does have a baby dick or not." Lazlo pointed out as Blitzo nodded.
"You see? This is why you are my favorite, other than Loona." Blitzo says as he then turned to Millie. "Now, Millie, care to tell us if your husband has a baby dick or not."
"Oh, well, Moxxie-,"
"DON'T TELL THEM ABOUT OUR SEX LIFE!" Moxxie snapped with a glare as he then turned to glare at his boss. "First off, sir, what you say and how you act is totally INAPPROPRIATE!" Moxxie screamed as he then turned to scowl at Lazlo. "And second, YOU ARE NOT HELPING, YOU ASSHAT!"
"Calm down, Mox! You're gonna have another panic attack!" A concerned Millie says while lying her hand on Moxxie's shoulder as he grumbles angrily.
"I AM CALM!" Moxxie shouted as Millie went over to give him a comforting hug, and said person started whimpering in anger while looking back at Blitzo as his boss rolled his eyes dryly.
"Look, I don't judge the boring couple stuff you do outside work hours. So, don't... judge me." Blitzo says while motioning his hands to imply sexual activity as Moxxie narrows his eyes.
"Oh, I do judge you, sir. Quite a lot, actually. In fact, we all do." Moxxie says while gesturing at everyone as Lazlo shrugs, Ratchet grins sheepishly, and Loona goes back to her phone as Millie gives her husband a disapproving look.
"Mox, he's our boss!"
"No-no-no, it's fine, Mills, your husband is just...how do I say this without being offensive? Retarded." Blitzo says while smiling smugly as Moxxie furrowed his eyebrows.
"Does immaturely insulting me make you feel better about your sad, single life?"
"It actually does," Blitzo admitted truthfully as Ratchet raised an eyebrow confusedly.
"Was that a roast to Moxxie or himself?" Ratchet asked Lazlo, who shrugged as Loona scoffed.
"The only reason you have a wife is because you're easy to manage!"
"No, he's not, you BITCH!" Millie screamed with a deeper tone while slamming her hands against the table as she glared at Loona with anger and flipped her off as the Hellhound growled angrily.
"Do not talk to my receptionist that way! She's sensitive!"
"Yes, I am!" Loona shouted as she was planning to attack Millie but was held back by Lazlo as he went over to hug her from behind to restrain her.
"Okay, I guess that we are all a little bit tense, so how about we all take a break?" Lazlo suggested with Loona calming down due to being in his arms as Blitzo grumbled.
"Fine, I'm going to my office to do very important work," Blitzo says while storming off as the area goes silent.
"...How does it feel being a simp to Lazlo, honey?" Millie asked Loona with a sly grin as Loona growled furiously and leaped out of Lazlo's arms to tackle Millie into the ground and began fighting her as the boys were forced to go over and try to stop them as we cue back to Blitzo, who is busy doing very important work in his office that involved having crude representations of Millie and Moxxie made out of office supplies that he puppets around and speaks with as, between them, is a framed photo of Blitzo with a robe pulled down off his shoulders seductively and a flower between his teeth as the text reads, '#1 Bitch' with 'BOSS' written in red over it.
"Oh, Blitzo! You're such a good boss! Yeah, I really want you, sir! Me, too!" Blitzo says while impersonating Millie and Moxxie as he grins seductively. "Let's three-way!" Blitzo says while lowering his 'employees' below his desk to crotch level, looking momentarily pleasured before being interrupted by the ringing of his Hellphone as he angrily lets go of his puppets and reaches over to grab his Hellphone to answer it. "WHAT?!" Blitzo asked with a glare while reaching over to grab his coffee mug with his free hand to drink it.
"Why, hello, my big-dicked Blitzy~," Stolas says lustfully as both Blitzo and Octavia spit out their coffee in sheer surprise as the Male Imp slams his 'BOSS BITCH' mug onto his desk.
"What-,"
"The-,"
"FUCK-,"
"Dad?!"
"Language, everyone!" Stolas snapped as a disbelieving Blitzo shakes his head. "I have a special request~,"
"Ah, look, I just had a chemical peel. So, you'll have to find someone else's face to plant that feathered ass."
"It's for my daughter."
"Ah...well, make sure she washes it."
"No! No, no-no-no!" A taken back Stolas screamed in disgust and shock as Blitzo spotted his employees fighting with each other through his door's window. "I'm taking my daughter to Loo Loo Land, and I was hoping you brave little Imps would accompany us."
"Uh huh, we're assassins, not bodyguards, 'kay? Don't invite us to shit unless someone's gonna die." Blitzo says with a glare as he is about to hang up his phone, but then-
"I'll pay you~,"
"...Pay me what?"
"Moneyyyy~,"
"Done!" Blitzo yelled with an excited grin while hanging up his Hellphone as he accidentally slammed his phone down on the desk hard enough to smash it to pieces as, after a brief annoyed glance at it, he then pulls out a megaphone. "Good news, everyone! We're goin' to Loo Loo Land!"
"Loo Loo Land?" A bewildered Moxxie asked while opening up the door with Ratchet standing beside him as they were covered with bruises and blood.
"Loo Loo Land?" A glaring Ratchet says, due to having a bad past experience with the park as a growling injured Loona can be seen slamming an equally injured Millie through the office door's glass as said person didn't seem bothered by this as she gained starry eyes.
"Loo Loo Land?!"
"Loo Loo Land?!" An excited Lazlo asked after tackling Loona through the door, breaking it down as he laid on top of her and restrained the Hellhound as said person blushed heavily due to having him lay on top of her.
"Loo Loo Land!"
"CAN ALL OF YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP?!"
After fast-forwarding in time, we cue over to Loo Loo Land, which is a bootleg spin-off of Lucifer's Lu Lu World Amusement Park with the name change made to avoid lawsuits as the park is located in the Greed Ring and owned by a demon named Mammon, who had signed a statement claiming he wasn't intending to rip off Lucifer as the park itself was a typical carnival with overpriced items and rigged games as it also was somewhat shabby as several elements of the park were either broken, cracked or look disheveled and run down such as the mascots, the animatronics, and the apple statues as its entirely populated by Imps as its patrons and employees.
Anyway, we see a large black van with an I.M.P decal spray painted on the side pull into the rather empty parking lot as Moxxie and Ratchet leaped out of the van and aimed their weapons around, scoping out the area for any threats before signaling that the coast is clear as Lazlo and Millie came out of the van as they went over to open the side door and a very cramped Stolas extracts himself excitedly while wearing an apple-themed hat, a short-sleeved white shirt with red accents, and red shorts as his daughter exits the van far less excitedly.
"I feel so bad for you, sister," Loona says dryly after she and Blitzo make their way out of the van as she wears a pair of black sunglasses, a long-sleeved black jacket with a long-sleeved white shirt underneath, a black tie, a black belt with a silver belt buckle, long black pants with a hole on it to allow her tail to pop out, and a pair of black shoes.
"Ugh..." A groaning Octavia says while pulling her beanie over her face as Ratchet slowly turns to her and is about to bark at her to stay with the group, only to take a look at her as he blushed a bit while wearing a pair of black sunglasses, a black mask that covered his mouth, a long-sleeved black jacket with a long-sleeved white shirt underneath, a black tie, a black belt with a silver belt buckle, long black pants with a hole on it to allow his tail to pop out, and a pair of black shoes.
"Hello there, pretty lady, I'm afraid that I never got your name," Ratchet says as an annoyed Octavia turned to tell him to fuck off, only for her eyes to widen a bit at the sight of him as she blushed and pulled her beanie down even more to cover her face.
"O-Octavia."
"Octavia? That's a pretty name," Ratchet says as Octavia blushes harder and looks away as a huffing Loona turns to Blitzo.
"Why am I here again?"
"Because I want us to spend time as Father and Daughter," Blitzo says with a warm smile while wearing a pair of black sunglasses, a long-sleeved black collared coat, a short-sleeved high-collared white buttoned-up shirt underneath, a black tie, a pair of elbow-length black fingerless gloves, long black pants with a hole on it to allow his tail to pop out, and a pair of black knee-high boots matching the shape of his feet.
"And because our headquarters is being repaired due to the fight earlier and she couldn't be in the building," Lazlo says with a sly grin while wearing a pair of black sunglasses, a long-sleeved high-collared black buttoned-up jacket, a long-sleeved white shirt underneath, a black tie, a black belt with a silver belt buckle, long black pants with a hole on it to allow his tail to pop out, and a pair of black shoes. "Although, I won't complain about it because I can spend a whole day in Loo Loo Land with you," Lazlo says Loona with a flirtatious tone as she froze and blushed as the Hellhound felt her tail wag around happily.
"Now, remember: this is work and work only." A glaring Blitzo says to Stolas as the group begins walking into Loo Loo Land. "Me and my crew are not here to satisfy your perverted bird needs, alright?"
"Hey...Dad...do we have to-?"
"Okay, yeah. Hold on right there, sweetie." Blitzo interrupted an annoyed Octavia as he then turned to Stolas. "If you try fuckin' my little ass in that park, I swear to-,"
"You are so cute when you are serious!" Stolas cooed while tapping Blitzo's nose as Octavia groaned in disgust.
"I'm literally gonna be sick."
"Oh, crumbs! I knew today would be a lot!" A worried Moxxie says while he and Millie rush up to a bewildered Octavia as he wears a pair of black sunglasses, a long-sleeved black coat with white cuffs, a long-sleeved white shirt that has a black turtleneck underneath, a large red bow tie, a pair of black fingerless gloves, long black pants with a hole to allow his tail to pop out, and no shoes. "What do you need? Anti-acids? Ibuprofen? Morphine?" Moxxie asked anxiously while fishing around in his fanny pack as he threw out several pill bottles and showed Octavia several hypodermic needles of a glowing, acid-green substance.
"That was figurative, old man," Octavia says with a deadpan tone as Moxxie blinks in surprise and chuckles sheepishly.
"Oh, right." Moxxie says while discarding the needles into a nearby baby carriage, where a baby imp happily reaches out to play with its dangerous new 'toys' as a worried Lazlo runs over to remove the needles while Ratchet bonked Moxxie on the head, hard.
"Wooooow!" An excited Millie says with starry eyes while wearing a pair of black sunglasses, a long-sleeved black jacket, a long-sleeved high-collared white buttoned-up shirt, a red tie, a pair of fingerless gloves, black torn denim pants, and a pair of black toeless footwear that exposes her hoof-like toes. "I haven't been to this place since I was a tot!" An excited Millie yelled while clasping her hands together as, after finishing removing the needles from the baby carriage, Lazlo turned to smile at her, equally excited.
"Same, sis, my family used to take me to this park a lot, and I still take my baby sister here on the weekends...also, no, you can't spy on me when I'm trying to bond with my little sister." A glaring Lazlo says to Blitzo, who pouted as Loona turned to him curiously.
"I didn't know you had a sister."
"You never asked," Lazlo says with a playful tone as he shrugs. "But her name is Nadia. Pretty cute and polite kid. Maybe I can introduce her to you one day." Lazlo says as Loona blushes and nods. "Anyway, this place hasn't changed one bit," Lazlo says as he and the others notice a large letter falling off the sign of a nearby ride, crushing the teenage imp underneath. "Yep, none at all."
"Ohhh! LOOK! It's Big Woobly!" A starry-eyed Millie yelled while pointing over at a hideously malformed animatronic dinosaur, which opened its mouth and let out a terrifying, demonic shriek.
"That is...deeply upsetting." A disturbed Moxxie says as Millie pouted.
"Oh, come on! It's fun! You've never been here?"
"No. Theme parks always disturbed me, especially the mascots."
"Well, hey there!" The Loo Loo Land Park Mascot says while appearing behind the young couple as he was wearing a large disturbing red/green apple.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Moxxie screamed while jumping back in terror as everyone turned to him.
"I'm Loo Loo! Welcome to Loo Loo Land! If y'all get hurt here, just try and sue us!"
"Look! Via! It's Loo Loo!" An excited Stolas says with a warm smile as Octavia rolls her eyes and crosses her arms.
"I have a question."
"Well, ask away, little girlie!"
"Is it true this park is just a really shameless spin-off of Lucifer's far more popular Lu Lu World?" Octavia says with a sly grin as Loo Loo pauses a bit.
"...No?"
"Really? Because this whole place reeks of insecure corporate shame. Plus, that sign over there still says, 'Lu Lu World'," Ratchet says with a smug smirk while pointing over at a sign that reads, 'Welcome to Lucifer's Lu Lu World!' as Octavia snorted amusedly and shared a high five with him as Stolas chuckles nervously.
"Why don't we go check out the rides?" Stolas asked as he dragged his daughter away.
"That chick's creepy, huh?" Loo Loo asked Blitzo, who scoffed as he walked away.
"Eh, wait till her Dad tries to diddle your holes."
"What's that mean?" Loo Loo asked Millie and Moxxie.
"Don't talk to me! I know you're a pervert under there!" A glaring Moxxie says while leading Millie off with him as Loo Loo hangs his body dejectedly.
"Yeah..."
"Hey, Loona, want to know something funny?" Lazlo whispered to Loona as she turned to her curiously. "Whenever my Sister and I come here, we always pull the same prank on the mascot to start things off."
"What's the prank?" Loona asked curiously as Lazlo smirked smugly and reached behind him to pull out a lighter.
"He, he, well, guess what? That suit is flammable." Lazlo says while tossing the lighter over to land on top of Loo Loo's head and set him on fire as he screams panickedly and runs around as the lovebirds laugh and walk after the group.
"Okay, not gonna lie, that's funny." An amused Loona says as Lazlo grinned cheekily.
"Yeah, and guess what? It was Nadia who came up with the idea. She's a little spitfire that's for sure."
"Really?" A curious Loona asked as Lazlo nodded.
"Yeah, I kind of influenced her a lot. She says that she wants to grow up to kill people too due to loving the taste of blood and seeing gore."
"That's...disturbing, my friend." A weirded-out Ratchet says as an equally disturbed Moxxie nods in agreement and turns to Millie as she is still looking around excitedly.
"You really like this place, huh?"
"I love this place. My parents would bring me and my siblings here when they could swing it. Money-wise." Millie explained as the gang looked over to see a worker wheeling a wheelbarrow piled to the brim with money into a nearby gift shop and approached the window from where novelty cups and stuffed apples were for sale as the cups appeared to cost at least 29 souls per.
"Yeaaaah. The prices do seem rather criminal. I mean, that much for a novelty cup that you use one time?" Moxxie asked as Millie and Lazlo rolled their eyes amusedly.
"Because, it's Loo Loo Land."
"Yeah, you have to sneak in your own drinks and food. Everyone knows this." Lazlo says just as Blitzo walks up to them while having loaded up on merch, including a novelty cup, as well as a hat with attached can holders and straws.
"Listen to your hoe and the guy with a bigger dick than you, Mox," Blitzo says while taking a swig from his novelty cup as their boss then gestures over at Stolas and Octavia. "Okay, here's the plan, I.M.P. Crew, how 'bout Ratchet and I take the first watch while you two have a little fun?" Blitzo asked while taking off his sunglasses and winking at the young couple as he then turned to Lazlo. "As for you, how about you go off with my daughter and explore the place? Also, make sure to look out for any perverts who want to take a piece of my daughter." Blitzo says to Lazlo, who turns to eye Loona up and down and grins slyly as he nods.
"Sure, boss."
"Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!" A really happy Millie cheered while leaping onto Lazlo's back as she gave him an excited grin. "Lazlo, do you know what this calls for?"
"Going to the best ride in Loo Loo Land? Hell yeah." A grinning Lazlo says while reaching over to grab Loona's hand, causing her to blush as he then reaches over to grab Moxxie's hand, and they run off.
"Which one?" Moxxie asked curiously as he struggled to keep up with the others.
"THE LAWSUIT!" Lazlo and Millie cheered happily while running over to a roller coaster named, 'The Lawsuit' as a lone Imp Demon could be seen riding around on the roller coaster, and the coaster suddenly plunges off a sheer 90-degree drop at incredible speed while also on green fire and with its rider hanging on for dear life as the coaster violently plunges into a tunnel in the ground.
"OH, CRUMBS!" A terrified Moxxie screamed as we fast forward in time and we see him violently vomiting into a trash can after having left the ride as a vomit-covered family walks by in the background, glaring disapprovingly at Moxxie as a massive dragon-like creature from the nearby petting zoo looms overhead, also glaring at Moxxie as Millie patted her husband's back to comfort him awkwardly.
"WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" The lovebirds cheered as they could be seen riding around in the Lawsuit Rollercoaster with an exhilarated Loona holding onto Lazlo while wrapping her arms and tail around him as the Male Imp Demon did the same and wrapped his arms and tail around her as he accidentally grabbed her left boob, but the Hellhound didn't seem to mind as she grinned at him slyly and Lazlo grinned back cheekily as he and Loona continued riding the epic rollercoaster.
Meanwhile, with the others, we see Stolas and Octavia walking around in another part of the park as Blitzo and Ratchet take up positions all around them with their rifles, on the lookout for any danger as a group of Imps could be seen creeping up behind the booths with ropes, knives, and pitchforks at the ready as they quickly scatter when a glaring Ratchet looks in their direction and a blushing Octavia turned to eye him up and down as she can't help but find him to be a bit handsome.
"So, uh, your job is to kill people?" Octavia asked nervously as Ratchet paused a bit and turned to nod at her.
"Yep, I kill Human Targets on a regular basis by using your Dad's Grimoire to travel in and out of Hell."
"Hmmm...cool, what is your greatest kill?" Octavia asked curiously as Ratchet turned to smirk at her.
"This one," Ratchet says with an evil grin while raising his Mark 3 Lancer Assault Rifle to shoot at an Imp Teenage Male trying to sneak up on Octavia to try and kidnap her, but fails as a bullet collides against his head and crashes down into the ground. "Stopping disgusting perverts from touching a beauty such as yourself," Ratchet says flirtatiously as Octavia squeaks loudly and reaches up to grab her beanie to pull it down to cover her blushing face.
"Awww, Blitzy, look, they are getting along so well," Stolas says with a warm smile as he reaches over to stroke Blitzo's horn. "They kind of remind me of ourselves, don't you think?"
"Hell no. Now stop talking to me. I'm working." Blitzo says as Octavia grows annoyed again and turns to glare at them.
"You both need to get a room."
"Ditto," Ratchet says as Blitzo scoffed and rolled his eyes.
"Hey, I am not a day hooker!" Blitzo snapped just as an Imp Woman walked nearby with her Imp Baby and glared at Blitzo before continuing on in a huff. "What? I just said I'm not one, prude!"
"Oh! Look, Via!" An excited Stolas screamed while pointing over at the circus tent as an Imp Demon Mother can be seen struggling to pull her crying son into the tent. "You used to cry such tears of joy at this show!"
"Oh, no..." A panicking Octavia, Blitzo, and Ratchet said in unison as we had a small flashback of a Younger Octavia being pushed against the stage by an excited crowd of imp children as Robo Fizz sparks and cackles maniacally leering over Octavia, who soon breaks into tears as a younger Blitzo is seen in the background tending to a food cart, dressed and painted as a clown, scowling as we see another flashback of a sobbing Younger Ratchet running away from an out of control Robo Fizz. "I hate that fucking clown." Octavia, Blitzo, and Ratchet said in unison venomously with glares on their faces.
"Oh, Blitzy~," Stolas says with a seductive tone while being captured and hoisted aloft by the crew of imps from earlier as his arms are bound, and his head is covered by a cloth sack as the Imps are pointing various weapons at him and one of them has stolen Stolas's wallet.
"I need my bodyguard, please!" An unconcerned Stolas as one of the Imps jumps up to try and skewer him with a pitchfork as an annoyed Blitzo quickly brings his rifle to bear, shooting the Imp in the torso, splattering Stolas's head with blood as the other Imps quickly scatter and we then fast forward in time as we see Octavia and Ratchet entering the big top and finding some seats as an irritated Blitzo carries Stolas in, head still covered in the blood-soaked sack, sets him down, and walks off to take a position as his Fuck Buddy makes no move to remove the sack until his Daughter annoyedly rips it off her Father's head just as Two Robo Fizzarollis appeared onto the scene as they had an appearance similar to the jester, but with key differences, such as pupil-less lime eyes and the lack of demonic tails as they wear jester caps with bells, lime ruffles and black collars with bells below, and happy faces on one shoulder and sad faces on the other as their outfits have red and dark teal stripes with lime trims at the bottom along with white hearts as their arms and legs are retractable, able to extend and bend far more than normal jointed limbs could as they also had forked tongues striped teal and black.
"Hey-hey-hey-hey-heyyyy, Implings! It's us, the Robotic Fizzarolli Twins!" Robo Fizz #1 greeted while speaking with a stutter, often sparking to indicate that he and his twin are in a state of disrepair.
"Shipped from Big Ozzie's factory to bring you a wonderful show celebrating Loo Loo Land, spelled with Os, to avoid lawsuits! H-H-H-H-H-Hit it!"
{Loo Loo Land Song}
Robo Fizz #1: Loo Loo Land!
Loo Loo Land!
Everybody sing along,
With the Loo Loo Band!
Robo Fizz #2: Every boy,
Every girl,
Every woman,
Every man,
Loves Loo Loo Land!
Stage lights turn on and point at Robo Fizz #1 and 2 as they begin singing and dancing just as the curtains open to reveal the Robo Fizzes' band, FizzaRolli 'n Friends, composed of various hideously decrepit animatronics, including Big Woobly on guitar as Robo Fizz #2 goes around pointing and gesturing at various Imp Demons in the audience as Stolas looks excited when Robo Fizz #2 gets to him, but this is short-lived as a glaring Blitzo and Ratchet aimed their rifles at a nervous Robo Fizz #2, who dashes back to the stage to continue dancing and singing with Robo Fizz #1.
Robo Fizz #1: Loo Loo Land!
Everything is beautiful,
In Loo Loo Land!
Ugly children holding hands,
In Loo Loo Land!
Striking a small pose, Robo Fizz #1 and 2 grinned excitedly as the platforms on the stage rose up in time with the music as Robo Fizz #1 then reached over to grab various Imp Children out of the audience and wrapped them up in a big hug before jumping up and tossing them away as most of the children slam into the bleachers while one soars behind them.
Robo Fizz #2: Everybody's friendly,
And nobody is mean,
No copyright infringements have ever been seen!
Robo Fizz #2 then went over to hug Big Woobly so hard that its neck broke a bit more than it already had been and then swiftly dashed over to the two-headed banjo-playing bear animatronic and slapped it in the back as the animatronic then squirted a stream of oil from its bigger head at the face of a nearby Imp in the bleachers attempting to drown out the song with music from his phone as Robo Fizz #2 then dumps a gasoline canister onto a large stack of cease-and-desist papers, lights a match, and throws the match and the canister at the stack, setting the whole thing ablaze.
Robo Fizz #1: I have a dream!
(Robo Fizz #2: He has a dream!)
Robo Fizz #1: I'm here to tell!
(Robo Fizz #2: He's here to tell!)
Robo Fizz #1: About a magical, fantastic place called Loo Loo Land-
The area around then goes dark as a spotlight shines down at Robo Fizz #1, who is lying on top of a grand piano with Robo Fizz #2 playing the song as Robo Fizz #1 grins widely and stands up while placing his hand on his chest as, before anyone could react, a royal red/yellow scroll was summoned out of nowhere with the help of golden/red flames as the musical comes to an abrupt short.
{Loo Loo Land Song Over}
"Wait, what's going on?" A bewildered Octavia asked as Robo Fizz #1 reached over to grab the scroll with an annoyed look on his face as he opened it and perked up.
"Oh, good news, everyone. I got a message from our faithful Princess of Hell herself."
"Ooh, let's see what it says." Robo Fizz #2 says as he and Robo Fizz #1 begin reading the scroll.
"Dear, whoever reads this, please tell Uncle Mammon to stop using my songs for his show. If he doesn't, I will call up my Dad and we will both come right down towards Greed Ring to have a personal meeting with him and settle this the hard way." Robo Fizz #1 and 2 read out loud just as the scroll burst into golden/red flames, and the ashes flew away in the wind.
"Huh, I knew that I recognized that song from somewhere," Ratchet said with a surprised blink as Robo Fizz #1 and 2 both shared a nervous look.
"...Uh...anyway, let's go back to the song!" Robo Fizz #1 yelled with an awkward smile while he and Robo Fizz #2 continued with their musical as Octavia absorbed the musical with disgusted boredom as an equally disgusted Ratchet elbowed her and mimed himself committing suicide by hanging as she snickered and covered her mouth to cover her laugh as he grinned.
"Hello, hello! Step right up and win a thing!" A Carnie Imp says as, outside, we see Moxxie and Millie walking along a row of game booths when they are addressed by one of the vendors as the bad bitch gleefully yanks her husband over towards the booth.
"Oh, look, Moxxie! A THING!" Millie says while gasping excitedly as she points upwards, and the 'thing' in question is some sort of purple stuffed penguin creature with Imp horns, wearing pink overalls as the stuffed animal is labeled with a tag that says, 'THING?'.
"Oh, you like that thing?"
"YEEEEESSS! I don't really know what that thing is but I want that thing!" A beaming Millie says while jumping up and down as Moxxie grinned smugly.
"Ahhh...finally, something I can handle," Moxxie says while reaching into his pocket to pull out some money and handing it to the Carnie Imp. "Okay. One game, puh-lease." Moxxie says as the Carnie Imp rolls his eyes and uses his tail to hand Moxxie a pistol with a cork projectile in the muzzle as the Male Imp does not even line up the shot, instead staring lovingly at his wife as he effortlessly hits the target right in the bullseye, but unbeknownst to Moxxie, the target barely moves as he makes a 'ricochet' noise with his mouth and blows the black powder smoke clear of the gun, pleased with his marksmanship.
"Ohhhh! Strike one, little man!"
"What?! But, I hit it!" A glaring Moxxie says as the Carnie Imp shrugs with a malicious grin on his face.
"Hmmm, I don't know what to tell ya, buddy. The target, see? It didn't go down. So, yeah...no go, bro." The Carnie Imp says as Moxxie growls in anger and fishes another bill out of his pocket as he grabs the pistol and fires another cork, hitting the target dead-center as the target does not budge, and Millie's Husband slaps the pistol in annoyance.
"The Heaven's wrong with this thing?!"
"Oh, man. A real shame, I tell ya." The Carnie Imp says while mockingly crying as Moxxie hisses in anger and slaps another bill on the counter.
"Another!" Moxxie ordered with a snarl as we cued back over to Lazlo and Loona as we see them walking through the theme park as they walked over to a 'Test Your Strength' Game, and the Hellhound gasped sharply as she pointed over to a pink stuffed bunny creature with Imp horns, wearing a blue dress as the stuffed animal is labeled with a tag that says, 'THING?'.
"Oohhhhh, I want it."
"You want that? Really?" A surprised Lazlo asked as Loona flinched and looked away awkwardly as she blushed.
"Yeah, I know it's stupid, but-,"
"Hey, don't worry, babe, I understand. I will get that thing for you." Lazlo says reassuringly as Loona blushes harder at the nickname.
"But how? These types of games are always rigged."
"Don't worry, I will show you a little trick on how to win rigged games easily," Lazlo says reassuringly while walking over to the Carnie Imp as the Male Imp hands him some dollars. "One game, please," Lazlo says as the Carnie Imp rolls his eyes and nods as he hands him a comically huge mallet. "First, you give some fake money to the Carnie," Lazlo says, surprising the Carnie Imp as he begins checking the fake money that he gave him. "Second, you whack Carnie on the head to knock him out while he is distracted," Lazlo says while raising the mallet with a wide evil grin as he slams it down on the Carnie Imp's head, knocking him out as he crashes down onto the ground. "Third, you grab the prize for yourself," Lazlo says while reaching over to grab the Thing and holding it out to Loona. "Here you go, my lady," Lazlo says with a wink as Loona blushes and reaches over to grab the Thing with a blushing smile as she then leans over to kiss his cheek.
"T-Thanks," Loona said nervously as Lazlo smiled and wrapped his arm around her body.
"You're welcome," Lazlo says while he and Loona walk off as we then cue back to the Robo Fizzes' show, and we see Stolas gleefully clapping to the music while Octavia has thrown her head back in torment and bangs her fist on the seat next to her as Ratchet rubs his forehead, and when the show ends with a small pyrotechnic display and both Robo Fizzes cackle maniacally, an Imp armed with a kris dagger rises from beneath the seats ready to stab Stolas, but the top of his head is quickly blown apart by a shot from Blitzo, who has taken up a position in the gallery behind the back row of seats while Imps scream in absolute fear and run away.
"Oh, my! What aim you have, Blitzy!" Stolas says flirtatiously as a furious Octavia stands up from her seat.
"Ugh! I can't do this anymore!" Octavia says while stalking off as a worried Ratchet spots this and follows after her as Robo Fizz #2 spotted this as he grinned sadistically, remembering about a certain little girl that he loved to traumatize each year as Robo Fizz #2 is quick to jump after them.
"Oh, isn't the show great, my little..." Stolas says before trailing off as he notices that his daughter is missing and grows worried. "Octavia? Octavia?" Stolas asked while walking off as Blitzo cycled his rifle and prepared to give chase after his charges, but was then stopped when Robo Fizz #1 spotted him as he laughed tauntingly.
"Mua ha ha ha ha hoho-oh! Is that Blitzo my sensors spot up the-e-e-ere? I bet the kiddies are still running away from you, huh?"
"The 'o' is silent now!" A glaring Blitzo snapped as he completely ignored Stolas and Octavia.
"A-A-Awwwww, just like your audience always was when you to-told your lazy jokes here!" Robo Fizz #1 says with a laugh as an annoyed Blitzo removes his glasses and throws them on the ground.
"Bitch, I make more money killing people than you do being a cheap-ass robo ripoff of an overrated sellout JESTER!"
"Oohoohoo! Someone's salty! Real or not, though, people lo-o-ove me! Does anybody love you...Blitzo?" Robo Fizz #1 asked with a low demonic voice as Blitzo shrugged carelessly.
"No...but, I'm really good with guns now! Dance, bitch!" Blitzo screamed with a maniacal laugh while slamming a new magazine into his rifle and switching it to full-auto as he opened up a volley of bullets on Robo Fizz #1, who cartwheels out of the way of the incoming rounds as he rapidly spun like a wheel and rolled up the stair to where Blitzo is as he coils himself around Blitzo like a snake before using his own momentum to launch Blitzo through the top of the tent. "Ohhhh, FUCK MEEEEEEE!"
"Torches, I say, I say! Get your inconvenient torches here!" An Imp Demon named Wally Wackford screamed while rolling a cart of lit torches in by the tent as a grunting Blitzo landed on the cart, scattering the torches everywhere, which lit the big top on fire as the green fire very rapidly spread to all corners of the park, burning and melting the animatronics, who flee the tent as Robo Fizz #1 cackles and spins his head with demonic glee at the destruction as the fire had destroyed his clothes to reveal black segmented limbs, a cylindrical upper torso, two ear-like appendages, and a set of glowing red eyes with white pupils.
"Ooh, Blitzo, look, history repeating itself, huh?" Robo Fizz #1 asked with a sly tone as Blitzo flinched and growled hatefully as he huffed, and we cue back over to Octavia, who was stomping across the carnival angrily as she then yelped in surprise when Robo Fizz #2 appeared out of nowhere and landed in front of her with an evil laugh.
"Hello there, little Octavia. Miss me?"
"Y-You again? Stay away from me!" A panicking Octavia says while stepping back as Robo Fizz #2 grinned sadistically.
"Oh, come on, best friend? Don't you want to have fun with your best buddy?" Robo Fizz #2 asked while stalking up to her menacingly as Octavia whimpered in fear and was about to call out for help, but then-
"Looks like I got here just in time."
"Huh? Who said that?" A bewildered Robo Fizz #2 asked while looking around confusedly.
"You're already dead."
"Nani?!" Robo Fizz #2 exclaimed in surprise just as a glaring Ratchet appeared behind him as he raised his Mark 3 Lancer Assault Rifle and activated its chainsaw function as he swung it down to slice a screeching Robo Fizz in half, shocking Octavia as both halves of the sliced up robot crashed down into the ground.
"Hey, are you okay, Octavia?" Ratchet asked Octavia worriedly as said person stared at him in surprise, feeling her heart beat rapidly as she blushed and smiled softly as Stolas's Daughter then ran over to leap into his arms and quickly raised his mask enough to give him a kiss on the cheek.
"Thank you. Can you please take me away from here?" Octavia asked shyly as Ratchet blushed but smirked and nodded as they turned around to run away, and we cue back to the married couple as we see that the Carnie Imp at the shooting gallery holds 600 souls of Moxxie's money with said person glaring at him as he seethes in anger.
"Wow, man, you're really starting to make this sad. Y'know, if you suck, you suck. Guess you won't win your honey here a prize."
"Ooh, let me try!" An excited Millie says while grabbing the pistol and firing a cork at a target, which misses wildly as the Carnie Imp grins mischievously, and presses a foot pedal in the booth as it causes a target to fall down.
"Ohhhh, look at that! Lucky shot, baby!"
"Are you kidding me?! You-You-You charlatan!" Moxxie screamed with a glare as Millie clapped her hands excitedly with a smile.
"Hey, uh, get lost, pipsqueak. I'm talkin' to the lady~," The Carnie Imp says while leaning toward Millie and making a seductive purring sound at her as said person immediately recoils in disgust, and Moxxie growls angrily as he then spotted Blitzo and Robo Fizz continuing to do battle against each other in the background as the fires spread and his boss was thrown up into the air by Robo Fizz as Moxxie noticed that he was heading straight towards them and grinned slyly as he then pushed the Carnie Imp forward, allowing a screaming Blitzo to come down through the roof of the shooting gallery, crushing the Carnie Imp under him as he got knocked out.
"Sir?" Moxxie says while pretending to sound surprised as a dazed Blitzo smiles at them.
"Ohhhh...hey, guys. You should probably go, uh, make sure Stolas and his Daughter are okay. I've got some unfinished business to take care of." Blitzo says while drawing his flintlock pistol cocks it, and allowing his employees to run off before firing at the now burning Robo Fizz as bullets collide against him, and the impact spins Robo Fizz's head around rapidly, but when he spins his head back, Robo Fizz is revealed to be unharmed by the shot, having caught the bullet in his teeth as he then spits the bullet out.
"Oh, what a mouth!" Blitzo praised as he immediately grimaced when he realized what he just said, and Robo Fizz coiled himself up into his rolling form again, charging straight at Blitzo, who leaped out of the way as his enemy hit the booth, destroying it in a large explosion as several pieces of shrapnel and burning prizes shoot in all directions as they landed near Lazlo and Loona, who were planning to head over to the tunnel of love as the surprised lovebirds turned their heads and spotted the battle before them as Lazlo grinned excitedly.
"Oh, ho, ho, this is going to be fun," Lazlo says while pulling out two chain-sickles as he spins them around rapidly. "Care to join, my lady?"
"With pleasure," Loona says with a wolfish grin while getting down on all fours as they both rushed over to the battle.
Narrowing his eyes at Robo Fizz, Blitzo aimed his flintlock pistol at him and fired another bullet at him, which he dodged easily and leaped over to try and attack him, only for two chain-sickles to fly over and wrap around his body and was forcibly pulled over to Lazlo as a growling Loona rushed over to then leap up high into the air and flexed her claws as the growling Hellhound proceeds to slash across its chest, damaging it as a grinning Blitzo pulled out his rifle and fired multiple bullets at Robo Fizz, sending it flying over to Lazlo, who jumped up high into the air to deliver a powerful kick down its chest to send Robo Fizz crashing down into the ground.
Growling angrily, Robo Fizz stood up from the floor but then yelped in surprise when the chain-sickles tightened around his body, restraining him long enough for a smirking Lazlo to pull himself down to slam on top of him and then jumped off as a snarling Loona rushed over to slash across his body repeatedly before being knocked away by Robo Fizz's extended arms as a furious Blitzo instantly fired multiple bullets at him with a mighty roar.
Drawing his chain-sickles closer to him, Lazlo began spinning them around rapidly and rushed forward to then leap up high into the air as he tossed his weapons forward, and they flew through the air to stab through Robo Fizz's body as the Male Imp then yanked him over to Loona, who had grabbed a booth and used her natural superhuman strength to lift it up into the air and used it as a makeshift weapon to whack him away as Robo Fizz twirled around and stretched out his arms to grab onto some nearby roller coasters as he began swinging away and a glaring Blitzo shot more bullets at him as he and the others chased after it.
"Octavia?" Stolas asked worriedly while walking through Loo Loo Land as he looked around and spotted Ratchet walking into a building called, 'The Fun House', while holding his daughter in a bridal position as he grew concerned and walked inside the building as Blitzo's Fuck Buddy was confronted with a surreal room of eyes, tubes, spikes, mirrors, and disembodied hands as Stolas goes further into the room, looking around for where his daughter could have gone as, before he could react, a random Imp jumps upon his back. "Umm, I think I'm supposed to be bodyguarded right now!" An annoyed Stolas snapped as the Imp covered his mouth with his shirt sleeve, but was suddenly shot in the head and fell to the ground as the lovebirds appeared in the entryway with Millie having just shot the Imp with a pistol as Stolas wiped said Imp's blood off of his sleeve and turned to glare at them in irritation. "Ugh, that's better, where is Blitzy? He's my knight in shining armor, not you littler ones."
"He's, uhhhh...busy," Millie says sheepishly before beaming excitedly as Moxxie hands her the thing that she wanted earlier and hugs it as his wife then begins kissing him on the cheek repeatedly to thank him.
"Being a fool."
"What kind of fool?"
"The 'Everything is now on fire' kind," Moxxie says dryly as a disinterested Stolas leaves the imps and effortlessly dodges between two swinging pendulums as he heads down a tunnel into an adjoining room and spotted the lovebirds riding in circles in apple-themed rail cars with Ratchet comforting a crying Octavia.
"Octavia..." A saddened Stolas says while discarding his Loo Loo Land hat, which in response to his emotional state has gone from a goofy grin to a sad frown as Ratchet spotted him and gently lets go of a sobbing Octavia as he goes over to him.
"I think it's time that you have a serious talk with your Daughter, Sir."
"Yes, I believe so," Stolas says somberly while walking past him as he goes over to sit down beside a teary-eyed Octavia. "I take it you are...not having fun."
"I didn't even want to come here!" Octavia screamed while glaring at Stolas as he looked away solemnly.
"I'm sorry, sweetie. I...I thought you loved it here."
"When I was a kid and my parents didn't hate each other...and my Dad didn't flirt with some...weird red dickhead the entire time."
"I'm sorry, Via. I'm sorry for...everything...happening right now. I know it's...a lot. I, uh- I should have listened." Stolas says as Ratchet gives him a sympathetic look in the background.
"I just want to go home...but home doesn't even feel like home anymore...You ruined it."
"Sweetie, you need to understand...your mother and I...I just...I felt...she's always been...I haven't been...ha...we weren't in...I'm sorry, I-I-I don't have the words." Stolas says while covering his face sadly and choked up as Octavia sniffled and turned to him sadly.
"Are you gonna run off with him? And leave me behind? Go away where... I can't find you?"
"What?! No!" An empathetic Stolas says firmly while reaching over to hug Octavia, who hugged him back as more tears ran down her eyes. "No, no, never. I'd never do that. Never. You are the most important person in my life. Never forget that." Stolas says sincerely while getting up from his seat as he held Octavia in a bridal-style position. "I think it's time to leave this place. You were right. You are too old for it, anyway." Stolas says while carrying Octavia out of the Fun House with Ratchet silently following after them as an Imp grins maniacally in the space above the drop-ceiling, looking down on Stolas as the Imp drops down and flicks open a switchblade as Octavia's Father immediately turns around, eyes glowing a bright red as the Imp immediately turns to stone and is knocked over by a pendulum.
"Whoa, damn." A stunned Ratchet says as Stolas walks over to him.
"What's your name, young lad?" Stolas asked as Ratchet glanced up at him.
"It's Ratchet, sir."
"Hmmm, Ratchet? You looked after my Daughter when I couldn't and I have seen how close you were with her today. I don't know what Stella would say, but you have my permission to one-day court her if you choose to do so." Stolas says as both Octavia and Ratchet blushed heavily.
"Daddy! Please!" An embarrassed Octavia says as we then cut to the outside and we see that the park has been reduced to pandemonium as dusk falls and we see Millie attempting to shoot at Robo Fizz, who rolls around wildly as it is then restrained by a glaring Lazlo and Loona, who used their chain-sickles to wrap around his body and held him long enough for Blitzo and Moxxie to appear onto the scene while riding around on the draconic creature from before as it proceeds to catch Robo Fizz in its mouth and swallowed it whole as Stolas, Octavia, and Ratchet walked past them as they arrived at the park gates.
"So, what would you like to do now?"
"Oh, can we go to Stylish Occult? They sell weird taxidermy there." An excited Octavia asked as Stolas winced a bit.
"Hmmm, okayyyyy..."
"And can Ratchet come with us?" Octavia asked shyly with a blush as Stolas relaxed a bit and nodded.
"Sure."
"Thanks, Dad. You're okay, sometimes." Octavia says sincerely as Stolas smiles.
"Thank you, Via. Thank you." Stolas says just as a massive explosion rocks the park, sending the employees of I.M.P. hurtling through the air, smoking and screaming as all of them crash-landed in front of Stolas, Octavia, and Ratchet.
"Way to ruin another good thing, sir..." A glaring Moxxie says as Blitzo grinned cockily.
"Worth it! That slutty toy clown had it comin'!"
"I'm going to fucking kill you, Blitzo..." A growling Loona says as Lazlo has his arm dropped over her back protectively.
"Moxxie? I think your wife is being kidnapped..." A groaning and injured Lazlo says while shakingly pointing ahead as a stray Quieve appears out of nowhere and grabs an unconscious Millie by her hair as he drags her away.
"I will call for a hospital for them," Ratchet says to Stolas and Octavia before running off to save Millie as Moxxie, Blitzo, Loona, and Lazlo grow unconscious as they crash down into the ground.
And done! I hope that you guys enjoyed the chapter, and I can't wait to write the next one. Also, yes, as you had already read, Ratchet will date Octavia, but only her.
Anyway, as always, I will catch you all next time.