A/N: So I managed somehow to recover my old account despite the email being defunct whoo whoo! So I figured I'd try to get back into the swing of with a fanfic idea I've had on again off again for years. It involved an alternate Spider-Man pairing featuring a character that…honestly I don't think I've seen ANY fanfics for. So I thought I'd give it a shot.

Disclaimer: I don't own Marvel that belongs to *Blerg* Disney

"Greetings readers, I am Utah the watcher. I observe the many facets of what you know as the Multiverse. Some compare the Multiverse to a river, others a tree. I see the multiverse as a pool of imagination. As long as there are stories to be told. New universes are created.

Now I'm sure that everyone here knows Spider-Man in fact many of you have seen his story played out multiple times, but come with me as one simple change, one chance encounter shall change Peter Parker's life forever. Friends, readers, true believers. Sit and let us explore the question…What If?

Earth-2634274, this earth has followed the history of Earth-616 up to the present. Unlike earth-616 however it's history has only reached to the point where Peter has graduated High School and is entering college. He has yet to meet Gwen Stacy or experience the tragedy of her death, or anything that came after a result of this tragedy. This Peter is about to start his day at the Daily Bugle."

Peter Parker came rushing into the Bugle building and put everything in his locker. To put things bluntly he hated his job. Well, maybe saying he hated the job was a bit unfair. His hate all seemed to boil down to one man, and that man was named Jay Jonah Jameson. He was a skinflint boss that seemed to hate anyone and everyone around him, and it seemed like the only person he hated more than his employees was Spider-Man.

It always seemed like Peter Parker got the worse of it. Peter was one of the best photographers of the paper. That was not him bragging, that was a comment made verbatim by his fellow co-workers. In a way that made Peter feel worse. Peter could give JJJ the best Spider-Man pictures one could shoot (and he often did) and Jameson would still pay him peanuts with the added threat of termination. So the question remained, why did Peter not quit? In truth it was a question the young 18 year old asked himself everyday that he got up, but where could he go? As smart as he was, Peter still had limited prospects, he was fresh out of high school and without a college degree of some kind, job opportunities were limited.

There was also the fact whether he liked it or not, this job gave him the most flexibility as Spider-Man. While most jobs could and probably would pay more, being able to take pictures of Spider-Man while on patrol, meant that his duties didn't have to be divided. Peter may have hated it, but unless someone decided to come along and subsidize his crime fighting, or JJJ finally gave him the pink slip, he'd have deal the hand he was given. That wasn't to say he became jaded at this point.

Peter let out an exhale as he settled into his desk, but rest would not come as he heard the all too familiar booming voice of his boss.

"Parker!"

Peter gave a sigh as he expected yet another tongue lashing. What would it be this time he wondered. Maybe the picture of Spider-Man did not show him in a bad enough light? The young Photographer marched up to JJJ's desk. As he entered the room Peter nearly recoiled as his nostrils became overwhelmed by the smell of stale cigar smoke. One would think Peter would have gotten used to it after working for the man for over 4 years, but alas that time had not come yet.

Peter took a seat as he watched his boss take a puff and smash it into his astray. Peter carefully cleared his throat not wanting to inhale any lose smoke.

"You wanted to see me Mr. Jameson?" Peter asked softly. "Did I do something wrong?"

Jameson shook his head. "Surprisingly, not this time. I actually have a new assignment for you, one not related to that wall-crawling menace."

Peter could not help but wince as Jameson once again called Spider-Man a wall-crawling menace. He should have been used to it by now. He knew that, but still the constant verbal abuse was getting to Peter, of course it didn't help that people had a habit of believing anything they saw in print or the internet.

"Ever hear of the model Ashley Crawford?" Jameson asked as he handed Peter a photo of the woman in question.

Peter looked at the photo and he could not help but feel enamored upon looking at the picture. Creamy freckled skin, strawberry blonde hair, striking icy blue eyes combine all that with a figure straight out of a painting and you had a recipe for America's top model.

In truth Peter did have some passing familiarity with Ashley Crawford. She had started in the modeling industry since she was 14, and by the time she had reached adult hood, her name and the brands under it were worth billions. Essentially, she was the Tony Stark of the modeling world. Much like how with great power came great responsibility however, with great beauty, wealth and fame came great scrutiny.

It was no secret that Ashley Crawford had the perfect body, perhaps a little too perfect. Many a gossip rags speculated how Ashley had gotten such a perfect body, many had suspected enhancement surgery while others suspected drugs. Occasionally stories popped up claiming she had been caught in a restaurant throwing up in the bathroom. Vultures in the press seemed to declare with glee that America's most beautiful woman suffered from an eating disorder. It honestly made Peter feel that all things considering Spider-Man could have it a whole lot worse.

"I have a passing familiarity with her." Peter said as he slid the picture back in Jameson's direction. "What does this have to do with me?"

"What do with you?" Jameson barked. "America's most beautiful woman is having a photoshoot here in New York and I want Pictures, maybe an interview too while you're at it."

Peter could not help but lift an eyebrow. "I mean, not that I'm willing to do it, but are you sure you want me on this beat? I mean, I'm not exactly the go to person for fashion and celebrity gossip."

"Trust me you weren't my first Choice, but Jess Patton called sick with the flu and Stacy Whitaker quit on me, something about a hostile work environment. You're frankly the only one I got."

Peter looked at the photo again and let out a sigh. As much as this was not his choice beat, he didn't mind the brake from Spider-Man. He got up and grabbed his stuff ready to walk out the door.

"I'll see what I can do Mr. Jameson."

"Remember, if you mess this up…!"

"I know, I know, I'm fired."

"In the timeline you know, Ashley does not take this faithful trip to New York and instead remains in the state of Wisconsin. It is a small change and yet it is here where our butterfly effect starts. It is here where both hers and Peter Parkers life, shall change forever."

The biggest issue with an assignment like this was that New York was huge, the states population was a staggering 19.8 million. Finding a particular person, even America's most beautiful woman was like finding a needle in a 5 foot long haystack.

Well you've really done it now Parker* he thought to himself. *You don't know that first thing about the fashion world, you got no leads, yet your supposed to get a photo with the biggest woman in fashion. What to do? what to do?

He decided to stop by the local Pretzel to get a quick bite. He didn't know why but pretzels had a way of making him think, and he definitely needed to think. As he took a bite he walked down the street.

Alright, well first things first I should probably check out whose running the shoot, from their maybe they can tell me what her schedule is going to…*
"…OOF!"

Peter felt himself fall forward as he felt the impact of person on person contact. He wanted to say that he typically didn't happen to him, but the reality was that he had a habit of pumping into people more than he cared to admit.

"I'm so sorry." He said turning around. The two of them turned around at the same time, and then he saw her. She was a woman in an elaborate fur coat, her hair was a vibrant strawberry blonde and she had icy piercing blue eyes, and her figure could only be described as absolute model-esque. With one look, Peter began to feel his face turn red. It was Ashley Crawford

"Oh boy am I sorry." Peter muttered softly. Ashley simply smiled and brushed herself off. "Sorry, Sorry, I should have watched where I was going."

"Oh no, no, no, this one was all me. They used to call me klutz in high school. Here let me help you up."

Peter helped the model up, he was shocked to realize just how tall she was. Granted he himself was only about 5'8, but he could not help but feel like she towered over him a bit, she had to have been around 6'1.

"Woah, were you on your high school basketball team?

Ashley laughed. "No, but it was something that I considered. Thank you for helping me up Mr….?"

"Oh! I'm Peter, Peter Parker."

Ashley smiled biting the corner of her lip. "You're the guy that shoots the pictures of Spider-Man."

Peter laughed and rubbed the back of his head. "wow, am I that famous?"

"Well, among the photography circles. I take it your boss wants you to take a picture of me?"

"uhh…yeah. Look I get it you probably got press constantly up your rear end like a pack of hungry vultures. If you don't want me to scram I can."

"Oh no." Ashley assured. "I can take a photo for you, consider it my apology for bumping into you. Hmmm…now should I pose like this…or maybe I should pose like this?"

Peter could not help but grin as Ashley playfully went into some of her model posses and decided to play into it.

"That's it girl! Give me fierce! More intensity! Show me confidence. Own the space! Alright, that's it I like it!"

There was just one little problem, and when Peter noticed he facepalmed hard enough and loud enough he thought all of Queens could here. Peter giggled causing Ashley to smile.

"What, what is it?"

"You're not going to believe this but…forgot to take the cap off the camera lens."

Ashley covered her mouth as a snort left her, and it was not long before the two were laughing like a couple of children.

"Ladies and gentlemen the official photographer of the Amazing Spider-Man!"

Once the mirth and the laughter finally died down, Peter removed the cap from the lends. "Alright, let's try this one more…"

Parker luck however would rear it's ugly head as he felt an all too familiar tingling in the back of his skull. And his head instinctly jerked to the right.

Come on, now?* he thought to himself? The sudden change in demeanor did not escape Ashley's notice. "Hey are you ok? What's wrong?"

"Nothing, nothing I'm fine. "

His eyes winded as the sounds of screams and cars being turned over echoed across the streets, now Ashley turned her head as her eyes widened.

"Look, Um…I got to go." Peter said softly.

"Yeah me too"

Peter quickly rushed into a back alley and quick-changed into his Spider-man costume.

Every time, every single time! Can I not go one day without SOMETHING going belly up? Why is it that every time I'm in the middle of something, THAT is when things start to happen.*

As Spider-man swung into the scene it became pretty clear who was responsible for the chaos. Sure enough, Spider-Man's Spider-Sense faired up as he heard the billowing growls, and thundering steps of The Rhino.

"Right, it's the Rhino because of course it's the Rhino."

All Spidey could do was shake his head. Seemed like AT LEAST once every couple of weeks the Rhino had a habit of breaking out of jail and causing trouble. At this point he was at a loss as to why Rhino even did what he did. Then again, considering the fact that Rhino was not exactly the brightest bulb in the boc, there was a good chance he did not know either.

"Seriously dude," Spider-Man snarked. "Do you ever take the day off."

Rhino looked up and gave a grin, his teeth were stained with a foul yellow. Clearly dental hygiene was not a high priority in prison life.

"Alright, let's get this over with."

Typically the fights with Rhino would work is Spider-Man would goad The Rhino, cause him to charge recklessly, trip him up with his webbing, bash him on the head, and repeat the process over and over again until the Rhino finally passed out.

This fight started out much the same, however a tiny slip up resulted in Spider-Man getting momentarily trampled. Aside from the obvious pain, Spider-Man didn't notice anything was off at first until the Rhino threw a car at a pair of bystanders. Spider-Man went to web the car up, but when he pressed the lever on his shooter, nothing came out.

"Come on, Come on!" Spider-Man growled in frustration, but it was pointless. His webshooters had gotten crushed when Rhino trampled him.

"No!" was all he could shout as he watched the car fly towards the screaming bystanders. The whole thing felt like it was going in slow motion and all Spider-Man could do was vainly try to rush forward in hopes that he could push them away before the car crushed them.

Things would change however when a very large figure would literally jump in the path of the sumersaulting car and catch it midair. Spider-Man's eyes widened as he gazed upon the bystanders sudden hero. She was a large woman in a bright yellow leotard, with a build that resembled that of the mutant supervillain known as The Blob. Aside from that, there was something about the figure that seemed familiar but Spider-Man could not exactly put his finger on why.

The insanely large woman in the looked down at the bystanders she towered over and smiled at them, seemingly holding the car above her head effortlessly.

"Go! Get a safe distance away from here!"

The bystanders, nodded and gave her a thank you before doing just that. Once the large woman knew they were far away enough, she placed the car down and focused her eyes on the Rhino who was frankly just as confused as Spider-Man was.

"Hey Buddy! Why don't you pick on someone your own size?!:"

The Rhino cocked his head to the side.

"And Just who are you supposed to be fat lady?"

The Fat lady in question grinned and cracked her neck and slammed her legs firmly on the ground in a way much like that of a professional sumo wrestler.

"The name's BIG BERTHA!"

A/N: Ok for those who are lost, Big Bertha is a fringe character that was first introduced in West Coast Avengers Vol. 2 #46. She's a major member and primary benefactor of a team known as the Great Lake Avengers. She (along with the other members of the GLA) is primarly meant to be a joke character, but the thing is she's essentially the female equivalent of "The Blob" having all his powers WITH the additional ability of being able to alter her size at will and at an individual level if needed. She's also potentially stronger than Spider-Man (depending on the writer) being able to lift anywhere from 50-90 tons, so honestly (In my opinion anyway) her powers are far from a joke. Anyway, hope this is enough of an intro to hook you in.