Summary:

Sometimes things don't go as we expect them to.

Penny finished pouring the milk into her bowl of frosted flakes and moved to sit outside on the patio. The newest addition to their home made for a great spot to watch the skyline, she had floated the idea to Sheldon about buying a second-hand wooden bench from Craig's list, just a passing comment and not two days later he had bought a brand new wooden bench that could sit four people comfortably.

"Penny, I will not allow second-hand or thrifted furniture into our home." She still chuckled at the memory. Wackadoodle.

Her laughter died almost as soon as it appeared, last night's memory still fresh on her mind. She took a spoonful of cereal, hoping the sugar would help with the bad taste.

Her friend group found out on DnD night, great, fantastic. But they forgot about their other group of friends. Saturday night was Howard's birthday party and Raj had begged them to come, well more like begged her to convince Sheldon to go. Which she somehow managed to do. But it wasn't until they were driving to the club that she asked. "Did you tell Raj or Howard about us?"

"No. Was I supposed to?" Pure confusion on his face and if she didn't love the guy she would have decked him.

A quick call to Raj and he was caught up to speed. He took the news very well…not.

"Koothrappali, stop that infernal noise!" Sheldon was holding his ears because as soon as he heard Raj started squeeing like a schoolgirl seeing The Beatles live.

"Raj, Hon. You have no idea how happy I am you're so excited about this, but the reason we're calling you is so you can tell Howard…and Leonard ahead of time." As she said Leonard's name she observed her Wackadoodle but there were no changes to his face or body language. She had heard how much of an ass Leonard had been to him, completely ignoring him during the few times they saw each other and Sheldon had assured her he didn't care but she still wanted to keep an eye on him.

"Shit." Raj had said and she agreed, Leonard could be a bit of a drama queen. "I'll take care of it, don't worry."

And that had been that. Despite his assurances, she had been expecting Leonard to make a scene. Which, to be fair, it did happen. Just not in the way she had expected.

They had entered the club holding hands, because it turns out that Sheldon was more touchy-feely that he let on, but not the point. They entered the club and Raj immediately moved them towards a booth where Howard was, she had looked around for Leonard but didn't see him and she sighed in relief.

Just as Sheldon was handing Howard the gift she had bought under both their names, raised voices made them all peek out from the booth.

Leonard was in the middle of the floor, in between Leslie and another woman. He had his eyes closed for some reason, until the woman she didn't recognize slapped him.

"Priya?" She heard Raj ask and before anything else could happen, Leonard ran away, leaving an air of awkwardness as he did. Raj approached the other woman who she later learned was his sister and hugged her.

Howard tried to dispel the awkwardness by asking the DJ to put on music for dancing but it wasn't until enough alcohol had flowed that people started partying for real. But Sheldon asked to leave and she couldn't agree fast enough.

Yikes.

Waking up the next morning she had a text from Raj explaining the situation more or less. It looked like Leonard had used Raj's sister to cheat on Leslie, he had lied to her about being single and they'd been hooking up for a little over a month.

Penny ran out of cereal, so she drank the extra sugary milk left in the bowl. What a bullet she had dodged with Leonard, she wanted to hate him but her gut told him that he wasn't a monster, he just allowed his dick to think for him. Raising the clean bowl as a salute, she let go of the lingering feelings of friendship for Leonard.

She wasn't stupid, she knew that he would throw a tantrum about her dating Sheldon and maybe even try to break them up. But she wasn't playing games, later, when Sheldon came back from his walk she'd have a talk with him so he was aware that Leonard might try something shitty.

Leonard might not be a monster, but it didn't mean he deserved a place in their lives.

Leslie stabbed her mac and cheese and wished she had chosen the green beans instead. It wasn't as satisfying with noodles. She refused to look up and see the pitying looks directed her way.

Fucking Hofstadter, of course it had to happen in public and not only that, but also in front of everyone they knew at work. The only silver lining was that the Geologists hadn't been present, she couldn't have dealt with that humiliation.

She should have punched him that night when he followed her from the gas station. That shit was creepy but she had let it slide…mostly because she had been horny, but now that dumbass decision had to come to bite her in the ass. This would be the third and final time she broke up with Leonard Hofstadter.

The first time they dated, the both of them had been awkward as hell about it. She had kept him at arm's length and he had used the L word way too quickly. The relationship ended because she sort of ghosted him, until he finally ambushed her in front of the lab and they broke up.

The second time she had been hopeful, here he was asking her out…and then she realized he was using her to make Malibu Barbie jealous. Not that said Barbie even cared, Leslie could easily tell. But the ego punch was rough and at one point she had attributed it to karma for ghosting Leonard that first time.

And now, this. Somehow, someway, probably because Barbie had been drunk off her ass, Leonard had managed to date the blonde monkey. Only for his issues to rear their ugly face and crash the entire relationship. Leonard had even moved out from Dr Dumbass' apartment.

This is the part where she was the dumbass for agreeing to sleep with him. But she had thought that he was over his Barbie obsession, that he liked her because of who she was and not just because she put out. But now, she wasn't sure if that wasn't all there was to it.

Fucking Hofstadter.

Leslie liked to think of herself as a Physicist first and a woman second. To be in her current position she had to fight tooth and nail, had to swallow the bile from hearing so many passive aggressive comments about her skills, her smarts, her looks, her voice. She made her way up to the top and swore to herself to never let romance get in the way of her research.

Fucking Hofstadter.

Of course the man she gave a chance to had to go and be a scumbag. Tears pricked at her eyes and she angrily swiped at them, but she knew that it was too late, people must have noticed them already. Fuck it, she removed her glasses and used a napkin to dab at her eyes. This was bringing back memories and feelings she thought she had buried.

Leslie was never one of the popular girls, she loved science even as a little girl and knew what she wanted out of life. This sadly meant that makeup, boys and all that other crap never really got her attention. She was one of the weird kids but thankfully not one of the bullied kids, despite her terribly shy nature and glasses no one had bothered to be mean to her, she had some friends who were just as nerdy as she was and overall she had a peaceful school life.

Once her hormones started wreaking havoc and she began noticing boys, she was too far behind her classmates. Her senior year was spent trying to figure out how to talk to boys…only to come to the harsh realization that boys didn't want to talk to her. No, she wasn't what the boys wanted. She wasn't a Barbie.

Finally satisfied that the tears had stopped, she grabbed her tray with her half eaten lunch, stood up and threw it in the trash. She wasn't that hungry anyway, no, she wanted caffeine. Heading to her car so she could go grab a cup of overrated and expensive coffee she resumed her previous thought.

No, Leslie wasn't a Barbie. She had to spend her entire life seeing how girls like Penny got whatever they wanted just by smiling at the right person while she had to work her ass off just to be acknowledged.

Though maybe not standing out would have been a better option…

College brought many changes to Leslie's life. It brought her out of her small and sheltered community into a bright and multicultural place, a place she loved, where she could learn as much as she wanted and not be the weird one out. How naive.

While she thrived in classes and her teachers praised her, she struggled to make friends. She had thought that everyone at college would be like her but no, college had its fair share of Barbies and no one wanted a Leslie.

And then she met him.

An adjunct professor took an interest in her and poor naive Leslie thought it was because of her smarts. Dumbass. She wasn't even interested in older men, but he had been so kind, paid attention to her, called her beautiful…Bile rose in her throat and Leslie had to stop walking to spit the bitterness out of her mouth.

He took so many things from her. So, so many.

After he left the college, she was left alone and bereft. Rumors started floating around that he had gotten a girl pregnant and his wife informed the school. Leslie pretended everything was fine.

It really wasn't.

It took her a long time to put herself back together, and once she did, the shy girl no longer existed. Sarcasm and sharp words were her new armor, she made fun of people and little by little she started living again, made some friends and eventually ended up at Caltech.

She promised herself to never let a man play with her feelings again.

Fucking Hofstadter.

He had an annoying way of worming his way into her life, one sad story at a time. It was her fault for dating a coworker. But he had seemed like such a nice guy…

Fucking Hofstadter.

"Hey buddy." Sheldon stopped with his empty tray and turned to look at the speaker. Leonard grasped at his hands in a nervous manner and kept looking around the cafeteria. "Listen, I was wondering if we could talk?" Leonard licked his lips.

"What in the world would we have to talk about after one hundred and thirty three days of you ignoring me?" Sheldon was honestly curious, he no longer considered Leonard even an acquaintance.

Leonard grimaced in the same way as when he ate dairy. Sheldon decided to take a step back just in case. "I know Sheldon, but…my life is not in a good place. I need my best friend."

"Oh, who that might be?" Maybe he needed help finding them?

Leonard gaped and then narrowed his eyes at him. "You! I mean you!"

"What in the world gave you the impression we were best friends?" Sheldon tilted his head as he tried to find the logic in Leonard's thinking.

Leonard threw his hands up in the air in a dramatic fashion. "I don't know, maybe the six years we lived as roommates and best friends?"

"But we're no longer roommates or best friends."

"Goddammit Sheldon, can't you stop being such a robot?"

"No. Good day Leonard." Penny had been right. Leonard would try to contact him and even as uninterested as he was in social interactions, he had noticed the insult. He ignored Leonard's further attempts to get to talk to him. He suspected that Leonard would not stay for long in the cafeteria due to Winkle using it. And like usual, he had been right, one glimpse at Winkle entering the cafeteria and Leonard had scampered off like a raccoon that had just crapped itself.

Raj had never really liked his sister much as a kid. She always made his life hell. But seeing her breakdown because of Leonard's betrayal made him feel like a child again.

Priya was supposed to be strong, she was supposed to be the badass of the family. She had once beaten up a boy for being late to a play date. So to see her cry so much made him uncomfortable.

"Didi, why didn't you tell me you were seeing someone?" Raj asked her. They were lying down on his bed and looking at the ceiling.

"It…wasn't supposed to be serious." Priya admitted. "But the more I got to know him, the more I liked him." Her voice was full of resignation.

"I…never thought he could do something like that." Raj admitted out loud. "We've been friends for a while now and…I didn't think he could do something like that." He was repeating himself.

Priya reached and squeezed his hand. "I'll be fine. I guess this means I need to be more selective." She tried to joke but Raj could hear the hurt in her voice.

He squeezed her hand back. He might not like his sister, but he still loved her.

"Penny." Penny turned to look at Sheldon, they were on the patio bench, holding hands. They were enjoying the night breeze as they waited for dinner to arrive. "Could we try something?"

Her heart skipped a beat. Sheldon was a fan of kissing but that's all they had done so far, not even in High School she'd been so patient. "Yeah, what?" She hoped the eagerness in her voice wasn't too obvious.

Sheldon licked his lips and she followed the movement like a hawk. "I've noticed that Erica is rather fond of sitting on Brian's lap…I would like to try that."

Despite how innocent his request was, she couldn't stop smiling. Fuck it, she was going to do the things she didn't do during High School. "Sure Hon."

Sheldon's lap was actually big enough for her but for the first time in a long while she worried about her weight, what if he said something? She moved and adjusted until she was comfortable and ended up resting her head on his shoulder.

"You can touch me." She had to remind him.

"Oh." He always sounded so surprised whenever she told him that.

His hands hovered over her butt and thighs, as if he was deciding whether it would be truly okay to touch her or not. Shaking her head, she grabbed both of his hands, one went to her butt and the other to her thigh, right above her knee. "This is supposed to be comfortable for you too, well…mostly, find a good position and tell me if you get tired." She needed to be direct with him.

She felt him nod but he was quiet, she looked up at him and noticed that he was fascinated with the hand on her thigh. She was only wearing her sleeping shorts so there was plenty of leg to touch. He squeezed and then let go, watching as his fingers sank into her. Out of nowhere she felt something poking her and a shiver ran through her. She knew exactly what was poking her.

One of her hands went under his shirt and she hated that he was wearing an undershirt, she pulled on it until her hand met his skin. He jumped a little but said nothing. She always had a thing about navel hair on men, she loved playing with it and looking at the way Sheldon shivered. He liked it when she did…or maybe it was because her hand was so very close to Sheldon Jr.

Leaning her head, she started kissing his neck, and she might have imagined it but she felt him adjust so she had easier access. Her fingers moved from playing with the hair under his belly button to play with the edge of his pants, she teased by putting one finger in and pulling at his pants, the way he bucked her let her know that Sheldon knew what she wanted.

"Penny." He gasped and she sat up to kiss him properly. Sheldon responded in kind and the hand on her butt was now squeezing her hard, she moaned and…then the doorbell rang. It broke the spell and Sheldon broke the kiss. He was breathing hard as his forehead rested against hers.

"Damn, almost had you." She said teasingly only to receive a confused look back. "I'll go get dinner because I don't think you're in a state to walk." Sheldon blinked, looked down and tried to cover himself which only made her laugh.

Despite what she had told him, she wasn't in any actual rush. She was enjoying these moments immensely.

The doorbell rang again. She gave Sheldon a quick kiss and jumped off his lap to go pick up the food.

Sheldon was slightly upset, it was supposed to be DnD night but for some reason Brian and Erica were not present. This was highly unusual, he would be ranting about the importance of keeping a schedule but the fact that Brian's phone was turned off and Erica didn't answer any calls or texts led him to feel something he rarely did about other people. Worried.

The group was sitting outside in the backyard and talking about nothing, he hated small talk so he simply enjoyed the feeling of Penny sitting on his lap as she talked with the group. This was an acceptable level of PDA.

Finally, halfway through their scheduled game time, Brian and Erica made an appearance. Any words he had for the couple died as soon as he saw them. Brian was pale and shaky and Erica looked as if she'd been crying for hours, she also refused to part from Brian's side.

Taking one of Brian's previous pieces of advice, he stayed quiet and listened.

"Hey guys, sorry, I know we're late but I couldn't leave until I knew each and every one of my kids was with their families." Keith stood up and offered his seat to Brian, who nodded in thanks and took a seat. Erica immediately sat on his lap and hugged him close, he rubbed her back.

"What happened dude?" Jonjon had a worried look on his face and for him, it was always unnerving to not see him smile.

Brian rubbed at his face with his free hand. "Where to start? School went into lockdown, we had an active shooter situation and I was locked in my classroom with all my 6th graders, not knowing if I would be able to protect them."

"Fuck…" Keith whispered but in the sudden silence he might as well have yelled. Sheldon was at a total loss of words, he of course was aware of these situations but he knew that statistically it was unlikely he would ever meet with someone that had to live through it.

Penny grabbed his hand and squeezed it almost painfully. He squeezed back.

"It took hours for it to be safe for us to move, I managed to send Erica a message but then I was busy trying to keep my kids calm." Brian nodded in thanks as Jonjon handed him a beer. "I don't know guys…this isn't why I became a teacher." He laughed but to Sheldon it sounded wrong. Too sad to be an actual laugh.

When the laugh turned into a sob, he knew he had been right.

A strange feeling of loss assaulted him, it was odd. He put his arm around Penny and held her closer. It helped but still, he was left bereft with feelings he couldn't process.

Jonjon hugged Brian from behind and the crying man patted the arm hugging him. Clearing his throat Brian spoke up again. "Thanks. I'm okay, I'm okay. I had already thought about quitting, but with Erica so close to getting her Veterinary degree, I wanted to wait…but I think I need to move on. I've been eyeing librarian jobs and the funny thing is that I would be making more than what I'm currently getting as a teacher…or maybe I'll go back to being a realtor."

That night they spent the rest of the night talking about the future of Brian's career, Erica never left Brian's lap and even Sheldon could tell that the overall mood was thoughtful. Brian's experience brought the reality of mortality into their fold.

"Hey Moonpie, I think I want to take acting more seriously." Ever since Brian's experience she had been thinking about this. At the moment she was comfortable where she was, but this wasn't why she had moved to California.

Sheldon looked at her, tilted his head and despite what she expected, he didn't make a smart-ass remark or questioned her. He simply told her. "How can I help?" Which made her smile like a fool.

She hugged him, because she could and because she wanted. He was at his computer and the position was awkward but he still returned the hug as best as he could.

On Sheldon's advice she dropped her agent and started taking more classes. He also encouraged her to try and expand her acting resume by taking more roles as an extra.

"Penny, how do you feel about acting on comedic sketches?" He told her one night and showed her an open audition for a Youtube channel.

"Hmmmm, I don't know Honey, can you show me one of the sketches they do?"

In a couple of clicks he had a random sketch open and almost as soon as it started she had to stop it. "Yeah no, not for me." Sheldon also had a face of distaste as he nodded.

"I agree. I will continue looking." He promised.

Things were moving slowly but at least she had an actual plan this time, and perhaps Sheldon wasn't off about the Youtube thing…just not comedic sketches.

Sheldon skipped lunch this time around, it was not often that he felt this conflicted. This morning right after he had arrived at his office, he had been summoned to Gablehauser's office. Initially he had been tempted to simply not go, but he knew that the imbecile would go as far as to visit his office personally and rather than disinfect his office after his so-called boss left, he just went to see what he wanted.

Congratulations and a large funding to go to the Arctic had not been what he expected.

This was enormous, this could prove String Theory. It was a dream come true…and yet, he hesitated. Now, alone and in his office the excitement had made way for another emotion.

Dread. No, not quite, it's true that there was some of that but it wasn't that. No, the emotion eluded him until he was able to isolate it correctly. Sad. He was feeling sad. He didn't want to leave Penny behind.

Taking a deep breath he considered bringing this up with Brian, but the man was still dealing with the aftermath of his dreadful experience. No, he knew what he had to do.

He was just sad that he had to do it at all.

Emotions were messy, this is why he preferred to not experience them at all.

Penny stood in front of the canvas but her mind was blank, she hadn't had issues picturing what she wanted to put into the canvas, until now.

Try as she might, she couldn't pick up the brush. It was as if a weight was on it and lifting it up was the hardest thing she could do. It frustrated her to hell and back because it felt like she was right on the edge of knowing how to start her new painting but it escaped her at the last minute.

By the time Sheldon got home she was still staring at the canvas, usually she would go up to kiss him but this time she waited until he went out to see her, which only took a couple of minutes.

"Hey Hon, had a good…what's wrong?" She had only glanced at Sheldon before noticing that he looked troubled beyond anything she had seen before.

"Penny. We need to talk."

Sheldon looked so serious that a small feeling of nervousness made her way into her belly. She laughed nervously and started playing with her hair. "You're not telling me you're having an affair right?" She stopped laughing when Sheldon said nothing and the nervousness in her belly started burning. "Right?"

"I believe we need to break up."

"Oh…"

End Notes:

I know...