Dib has found something he wasn't meant to see, and whether he wanted to or not, he would need to confront Zim with this new knowledge. No matter how it may end.
"Hhhhhheeey, Zim." The red one said.
"Yeah, hey Zim!" The other, purple one, exclaimed.
"Sooo guess what! We got out of that whole, Florpus, thing. Ring any bells?"
"Yeah, you know, the one YOU made?!"
"But you know what? That's all in the past!"
"YEAH, in the past-wait, really, we're just gonna let him get away with-"
"Of course not, that's what I'm getting to!"
"Oh, right right."
"*Sigh* But…as said, that's in the past! No hard feelings, no hard feelings at all! Cause if there were, that would mean we would have to send the entire Irken Armada to that piece of junk called a planet and erase any trace of your little, itty-bitty existence!
"Such a bore!"
"Exactly, couldn't say it better myself. So, instead of doing all of that work, we decided it would be best to…what was the word again…RETIRE! Yes, to retire you as an Irken Invader! And as an Irken Soldier…or an Irken at all."
"So, congratulations! You now have all the time in the world to enjoy your stay on that planet of yours."
"We even took the precaution of blacklisting it from any and all Irken databases so that no one will come and disturb your well-deserved vacation. Imagine, no one will come looking for you, no one will find you, it will be as if that planet, or even you as a matter of fact, don't exist."
"Doesn't that just sound GREAT!"
"We sure think so! So much in fact, that we have made sure that any Irken that meets you, is obligated by the Tallest decree possible, to disintegrate you into atoms. You know, in case you get the wild idea to skip out on your vacation!"
"Wouldn't want you to do that *sniggering*!"
"And lastly, we finally managed to get a software engineer capable of making it impossible for you to hijack our coordinates and contact us. Which has been surprisingly difficult, and cost the Irken race about twenty percent of our greatest tech-minds their lives. So, congratulations on that, I guess. And we did that because…uhhh…you know what, screw it, WE DON'T WANT YOU ZIM! WE NEVER DID!"
"LIKE SERIOUSLY, I thought we had made that clear SEVERAL TIMES!"
"SO IF YOU EVER DARE SET FOOT ON IRKEN SPACE OR EVER SHOW YOUR FACE AND DISGUSTINGLY TINY BODY IN FRONT OF US, YOU WILL REGRET IT…how was that, was that good?"
"I don't know…"
"I think it went great."
"I don't feel like I got to say anything."
"What?! You did, you said…something, surely."
"See what I mean!"
"Well, it isn't my fault you couldn't remember any of your lines."
"ME?! You dropped the whole act at the end! Why did we even make lines if you're just gonna…Is, that still recording?"
"Huh? UGH, really?! Someone better edit out this last part or I SWEAR TO-"
With that, the video suddenly stopped, and Dib was left staring at his own dumbstruck expression in the TV's reflection.
He stood and stared blankly for what felt like an eternity, as he wrapped his head around all the information he had just listened to. Even when he hadn't fully comprehended it, he still felt the panic setting in and his lungs hyperventilating. It was as if his body instinctively knew something mind-shattering had entered his brain and was preparing for the inevitable meltdown.
"MY SENSORS INDICATE THAT YOU ARE ABOUT TO PASS OUT. I WOULD SUGGEST THAT YOU-" Zim's computer started saying, before as predicted, Dib fell from where he stood and crashed into the floor. "-...SIT DOWN ON THE COUCH."
Luckily, it was just the lack of air that caused Dib to lose his balance. So once he managed to gather some breath, he struggled to crawl up the edge of the couch.
"YOU ARE MORE THAN WELCOME TO REST ON THE FLOOR IF YOU SO DESIRE."
"No, no, I'm fine with the couch," Dib muttered with a shaking voice, as he reached the top and threw his body onto the soft pillows. Having sat himself up in a contemplative position, he stared up at the ceiling in silence, as he continued to take in what he had learned. If he had his way, he would have stayed there for hours, going through nonstop scenarios and explanations that could help him make sense of everything. But unfortunately, he was in Zim's home and the looming threat of the alien returning any moment, forced him to speed things along.
"What…does that message mean?" He asked out into the air, hoping the computer would answer.
"WHAT DO YOU THINK IT MEANS?" It replied rather unhelpfully, with Dib sure he could hear a hint of sarcasm in its robotic voice.
"I…I-I don't know. Did Zim…lie to me?" Dib said, his voice breaking at the end
"MOST LIKELY YES."
"But…BUT WHY?! Was all of this a trick, a trap, or some kind of scheme? Was there always an ulterior motive, or did he-"
"WHEN IT COMES TO MASTER ZIM, HE IS JUST AS LIKELY TO MAKE SOME ARCHAIC SCHEME BEYOND A SANE PERSON'S COMPREHENSION, AS HE IS TO HAVE LOST HIMSELF TO SOME KIND OF DELUSION OF HIS OWN MAKING."
"...That is true." The human muttered, feeling like being on the edge of sobbing. However, he couldn't guess why. It was Zim after all. Of course, he had wanted to trick him. Or did he trick himself? He couldn't make heads or tails of it. At one end, he now knew that the Tallest hadn't called for Zim, and rather had completely ended all contact and banned any attempts on Zim's end to leave and join the Irken Armada. But on the other end, he couldn't understand why Zim would need his help and then lied about why he needed it. If Zim told him that he needed to leave Earth, then there wouldn't be a need to lie, any reason would have sounded reasonable. And yet, he still lied.
Perhaps that was why he was feeling a gnawing pain in his chest. Because he felt betrayed. He wouldn't have guessed, but it seemed what Zim had said about having earned his trust went both ways. And now the alien had broken his. Dib wanted to feel angry, to feel like ripping Zim apart and opening up his insides and tearing anything resembling an organ out, just like in the old days. But he just couldn't. All he did was feel sad and confused. He didn't even know if he would be able to face Zim with what he now knew.
As if the universe had a vendetta against him, he heard the sound of an elevator, and before he knew it, the sound of a trashcan lid opening. Confused he looked around, trying to discern where it came from. Then, his eyes landed on the way to the kitchen. And there, in the opening, stood Zim. His hands were filled with Irken tech, and Dib could barely see his face.
"Oh, the lazy and useless Dib has FINALLY decided to wake from his involuntary coma." The alien scuffed, as he carefully balanced the stack of devices in his hands and walked over to the handmade radar. He practically threw the stuff to the ground, and immediately went to work with some wiring. All Dib could do was stare blankly at Zim, too scared to even make a sound. Unluckily for him, the lack of a rebuttal from the human confused the alien. Zim stopped working and looked over at Dib, tilting his head slightly.
"Umm, Dib-thing? You there?" He asked, and Dib's heart raced as he realized he had to answer.
"O-Oh, yeah, t-totally!" The human replied, compensating a little too much for his lack of calmness. Even Zim knew something was off, and narrowed his eyes.
"You're acting more strange than usual."
"I-I'm just…not done waking up yet!" Dib stated, with about as much believability as a person shaking and glancing from side to side can have. Miraculously though, it seemed Zim was willing to believe him.
"It's incredible you human-worms can even function." He remarked as he shook his head and started working again.
Meanwhile, Dib stared at him from the couch with apprehension. The alien seemed so calm and collected, that it was hard for him to fathom he was lying to him. Usually, Zim is downright terrible at lying, except in a few cases. Unless this was one of those cases, then he should have been able to see right through him. But as it stood, he had no idea what Zim had in mind with his deception. After all those years together, he had prided himself on being the only person in the galaxy at least somewhat able to decipher Zim's actions. Unfortunately, his years of experience were useless at the moment. But as the alien kept working, something started to overtake the pit in Dib's stomach. A sense of curiosity. Zim had lied to him, and he wanted to know why, even if the answer would be as devastating as Zim saying he had just acted like his friend. That was still his biggest fear, that their connection still meant nothing to the alien. If that was the case, he needed to know for certain.
With shaking legs, he stood up. While trying his best to control his breath, he walked over to the alien, each step more terrifying than the next. The moment had come all too soon when he finally reached his destination. He looked the alien over the shoulder, trying to distract himself. Zim was too busy working to care what Dib was doing. But the slightest twitches in his antennas revealed he knew the human was watching.
"S-So, Zim…" Dib muttered, interlocking his fingers in order to calm his nerves.
"What, you're finally gonna stop being useless and start assisting Zim?" He fired quickly back, not bothering to turn his head.
Once again the human couldn't find the words to respond with, alerting Zim that something was off. He scoffed and threw a twisted screw to the side.
"I'm starting to wonder if you've been infected with the Schalivian Mindbug, with how unusual you are today, Dib-worm."
"The what now? You know what, fine-" Dib exclaimed, making a deep exhale. "-I just wanted to ask you something."
"Then do it and stop wasting Zim's precious time." The alien replied, and if he had eyeballs, he would have rolled them so far they would have popped out of their sockets. He took a wrench and started to tighten a bolt, without much interest in their conversation. As far as he was concerned, Dib was suffering from some coma-induced side effects, and he couldn't wait for things to go back to normal. But that reality would quickly shatter, as the words slowly spewed from Dib's mouth.
"What… exactly, did the message from your Tallest say?" Dib asked, trying to sound nonchalant, though his mouth was practically shambling.
The wrench Zim was using made a sudden twist, breaking the head off of the bolt. The broken piece of metal fell to the ground like an earthquake, sending waves of noise through the silence that had overtaken the room like a thick mist. Zim had frozen still and stared aimlessly at the alien machinery in front of him. His mind shut down for a moment until it came back with a conclusion that could allow Zim to keep his cool.
"What I already told you, if you haven't forgotten it with your ABYSMAL human memory."
"Yeah, I remember, b-but why don't you tell me again? You know, for clarity's sake?"
The alien hesitated but feared his own silence more than he did his words.
"They called to tell me that my mission on this garbage planet was no longer necessary and that they wanted me to come back to do something MUCH MORE important with all my incredible skills! Which you no doubt understand have been UTTERLY wasted on this dirt-rock." Zim told him, using his usual hyperboles, but making sure not to show his face to Dib.
"...Is that what they really said?" Dib finally asked, his voice hauntingly solemn, sending a shaking sensation from Zim's insides to his claws.
"OF COURSE THEY DID!" Zim almost yelled, once again going back to work, though much more aggressively. "HOW DARE YOU SUGGEST ZIM IS SPEAKING UNTRUTHFULLY?!"
"Zim…"
"WHAT HAS ZIM DONE TO DESERVE SUCH TERRIBLE ACCUSATIONS?! HAVE I NOT TREATED YOU MERCIFULLY NICELY?!"
"Zim," Dib repeated, more firmly, as he carefully built up his courage.
"MAYBE I SHOULD ACCUSE YOU, DIB-THING, OF TREASON AGAINST ZIM?! HOW WOULD YOU LIKE IT, YOU FLESHY, DISGUSTING BAG OF INFERIOR MEAT-"
"ZIM!"
"WHAT?!"
"I saw the message."
"..." A few moments of quiet passed, which for Dib, was the most terrifying thing of all.
"You lie," Zim finally responded, in a mix between a hiss and a growl.
"I did see it. A-And you know? It said some pretty interesting things!" Dib answered back with a forced grin, as a reaction to the uneasiness in his stomach.
"Things like, how you weren't meant to leave Earth-"
"You lie!"
"-and that if you did, they were going to execute you. And that you weren't even an Invader anymore! A-And you know the best thing of all?! That one small, nice, grain of knowledge you could have been so nice to share with me! That they didn't say anything about that damn tracker device you've made me RISK MY LIFE TO HELP YOU FIX!"
"SHUT UP!" Zim yelled as he stood up and turned to face Dib, his face mangled in an expression of fury.
"No, you shut up!" Dib yelled right back at him, the tears starting to swell in his eyes. But his sadness was slowly being replaced by frustration. Because he had started to realize that their latest time together, had all been a lie. He had risked his neck for Zim with the promise to free the Earth from his presence. That was the plan and the promise. But now it was clear it had all been fake. His words were swelling with anger, and whatever understanding he wanted to get, was drowned out by his desire to hurt Zim, just a bit.
"Whatever you say is meaningless, don't you get it?! You lied to me, paraded this promise of finally being free from you in front of me just to get me in a situation where I could have died. And for what, so you could feel better about being abandoned?!"
"I have not been abandoned!" The alien stated with as much conviction as he could, but it was clear it was a fragile front.
"Yes you did, and as always, you take it out on me! Like you do everything! Frankly, I can understand why your Tallest want nothing to do with you, I REALLY do."
"LIES! YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT! THEY WOULD NEVER ABANDON ZIM!" Zim refuted, his mouth formed into a snarl showing his rows of sharp teeth, while his body trembled. It was clear he was on the edge of breaking. But even then, Dib didn't feel satisfied. He wanted more, to see the alien hurt no matter the cost. All so that Zim could feel a fraction of the agony he felt.
"Of course they would Zim. You're a small, pathetic bug, that does nothing but betray and scheme, while being more useless than a broken piece of garbage! Even if I wasn't here to stop you at every turn, I'm sure you would still somehow manage to mess up the SINGLE thing you were meant to do! Trust me, whoever you wish to serve, would be better off without you." Dib finished saying, hoping to twist the knife as much as possible.
The snarl on Zim's face disappeared for a moment, replaced with an abject panic that almost frightened Dib. He could feel his brain bashing itself, as the regret immediately set in and he wanted to take his words back. But there was no time to apologize or backpedal, for the snarl returned on the alien's face, more vicious than before. The trembling was gone, replaced with violent shakes as if he could explode any moment. Even without proper eyes, he could feel Zim's gaze pierce his soul, in a manifestation of his pure, unbridled rage.
I may have gone a bit too far. Dib thought to himself before he was forced to duck, as Zim jumped at him. The alien had always been incredibly fast and agile, as far as Dib could remember. Which meant it wasn't his first rodeo with the alien. So after dragging up a few old instincts from memory, he managed to turn and jump to the side, as Zim came barreling toward him once again. It became almost like a dance, as Dib ran and jumped around the living room, with Zim always on his heels like a feral animal. The human pushed things out of the way, while Zim tore and shredded things to pieces with his claws. Tables, lamps, paintings, whatever wasn't nailed down came to lie on the floor, while the wallpaper became covered in long, gnarly gashes. It didn't take long for Zim's hunting and Dib's dodging to make the room look like a warzone.
But the dance couldn't last forever. One mistake was all it took. Dib took a gamble on where Zim would jump over to and lost the bet. He had found himself in front of the couch, looking around desperately to find Zim, before he heard a familiar growl behind him. He turned around just in time to catch the flying Zim in his arms, as he was pushed back and fell onto the couch, the force making the couch tip over. Once the disorientation disappeared, Dib realized he was on the floor, and above him, a bloodthirsty Zim, which he held in his hands. He was lucky his arms were longer than Zim's, for the alien was clawing at him, aiming for the throat. Only a few inches kept Dib's delicate skin from being torn open.
As they lay there on the ground, Dib was able to stare directly up into Zim's face. There he was met by an animalistic anger he hadn't seen for a long time. Memories of their old days came flooding back like a tidal wave and he realized that Zim really was trying to kill him. He let out a short gasp as the realization set in. Zim continued his feral attacks, unbothered by the human's shock. That was until, a cringed expression spread on Dib's face.
"Are you kidding me, Zim?!" The human asked with the most indignant voice possible, managing to make the alien pause.
"You're actually trying to kill me over this, after everything we've been through?! As if I'm in the wrong here! You lied to me, space boy! Remember that! And now you're just going back to how it always was. I thought we were through with this, that we were better than this! Did all these years fighting and annoying each other just add up to nothing?!"
Dib could see Zim's fury trying to take back control, trying to break free once again. But the sheer confusion the alien was experiencing was enough to hold it back.
"I don't want us to go back to how things were, okay?! I don't want us trying to kill each other, not anymore. I don't want to fight someone I care about, and one of the only two people on this LOUSY planet that actually care about me! All I wanted was to help you. Not just because it was best for Earth, humanity, the common good, or whatever, but…because you're my friend. I just wanted to help my friend, cause that's what we are now, right? Right?!" Dib repeated, his facade breaking down, revealing the truth that lay beneath. A worried boy, scared he was losing someone he cared about.
Zim's confusion only grew in the face of that, with hints of regret in the visible trembling at the corners of his mouth. It was an unfamiliar emotion for the alien, who in a fit of panic jumped away from Dib and crawled over the overturned couch. Leaving Dib on the floor alone.
He stayed there for a moment, letting his rushing blood calm down, now that the danger was over. When he finally decided to get up, he could feel the exhaustion and soreness all over his body. With a careful step toward the couch, he looked behind it. There he found Zim sitting on the other side, with his knees up to his chin and his eyes staring uncaringly forward, filled with a mix of tiredness and melancholy. The rational part of Dib's mind told him that he should be careful, that Zim might attack him again. But he pushed the worries aside, and instead let out a sigh. Slowly, he vaulted over the couch and sat wordlessly next to the alien, who didn't react to his presence. They sat there in silence, looking at the black screen of the TV, which now had three, thin slashes across its surface. Dib looked around and realized the mess they had made.
"Did we usually get so destructive when we fought?" He asked, genuinely unable to remember.
When no answer came, he finally found the courage to look at Zim. The alien's expression hadn't changed, and he still sat in that sad, disillusioned state. Zim's breakdowns usually meant two things. Either a surge of violence he could barely control, as seen before. Or an overdramatic indulgence of self-pity, right out of a bad reality show. But this time, it was neither of those. This time, he was just silent and glum. Dib didn't expect it, but it tucked at his heartstrings hard enough, that he felt the need to apologize first.
"I…said some things, that were perhaps a bit harsh. Of course I don't think you're-"
"You're right," Zim interrupted him suddenly, earning a surprised look from Dib.
"Zim is useless." The alien continued, with a somber tone.
"No, that's not what-I didn't really mean-..." Dib muttered, ending up not finding the right words and stopping. Only later, did he come up with something to say.
"Why don't you start at the beginning?" He asked, finally making the alien look at him with a puzzled look. His eyes were large and unblinking as always, but still, they oozed a sense of bereavement.
"The message," Dib explained, saying it quietly.
"What is there to say," Zim answered, looking away with a sigh. Dib was worried he wouldn't tell him, but on his own accord, the alien decided to relay his side of the story anyway.
"I got the message from my Tallest after our battle at the yard-of-junk. They relayed that my purpose as Invader, as…Irken…had reached its end. And that my final objective was to stay…on this ball of dirt." The alien told him, the sheer bewilderment in his voice revealing that he still hadn't quite accepted it.
"Then, the Tallest Tracker…thingy, was to?" Dib asked.
"To find them, what else!" Zim replied with a tinge of frustration, though it quickly fizzled away.
"Zim needed to find the Tallest and speak with them, because…the message, it had to be wrong! It had to!" The alien continued, now with a broken grin and a mad look on his face. "The Tallest would never strip Zim of his title! They would never leave him here amongst the disgusting human-pigs! Something must have happened with the message, space interference-a bad signal-SOMETHING?!" He exclaimed with a sudden surge of life. But just like before, it dwindled away, leaving him the husk he was before.
Dib took it in, and looked over at the alien radar, standing there without a care in the world, having managed to survive the destruction of the room.
"Would it even have worked?"
"I would amplify its capabilities, make sure it would override any attempts at cloaking the Tallest's location." The alien said, though, to Dib's shock, there wasn't much self-assuredness in his voice.
"But even if you managed to find them, if you left Earth….they would try and kill you."
"Only if the message wasn't corrupted." Zim retorted. "And if that is the case…then why should Zim even care about living."
"Come on, don't say that." Dib was quick to say. He knew Zim had a flare for being overdramatic, but the words still made his insides churn.
"I said we-...we are friends, aren't we? That means I need you here."
He extended his hand to comfort the alien, who jerked back and hid his face under his knees.
"You just said that so Zim wouldn't tear out your weakly air-tube," Zim mumbled with a dismayed tone.
"Well, yeah." He replied, rolling his eyes, before he realized what he had said. "-WAIT, NO-I MEAN-I said it to try and make you calm down, but I still meant it! That has to count for something."
Once again he tried to reach out, but just as he was about to touch Zim's arm, he suddenly groaned and briskly stood up.
"The only thing that 'counts', Dib-Thing, is whether I get this machine working!" Zim stated angrily, pointing at the radar, his sharp teeth flashing at the edge of his mouth.
"Oh yeah, and then what?" Dib asked, feeling his own frustration building.
"I ALREADY TOLD YOU! ARE YOU SO STUPID THAT YOU FORGOT?!"
"OH, I REMEMBER ALRIGHT!" Dib shouted, standing up himself, so the two could have a stare-off. "I REMEMBER YOU SAYING YOU WERE GOING TO FLY OUT INTO SPACE, JUST YOU COULD GET BLOWN UP!"
"NO!" Zim shouted, trying to sound as resolute as he could. "I will find the Tallest, and they will take me back! And then they'll give me a new purpose, as far away from this place as possible!"
"Do you really….no, of course, you do." The human muttered, before taking a deep breath, taking a chance that Zim wouldn't go crazy on him again. "Zim…they don't want you back."
Behind his angry facade, he could see a bit of Zim break, hearing those words. And seeing the otherwise unrelenting, bundle of unfounded optimism and confidence that was Zim like that, broke a bit of Dib too. But he knew he couldn't back off. This might be their most important talk, and he wouldn't turn back, he wouldn't allow himself to. Not this time.
"I saw the message, heard it myself. It's not corrupted. Your Tallest have essentially exiled you, Zim. If you even try to go back, they will kill you-"
"FINE!" He snapped back, gnashing his teeth together. "Then I'll at least die an Irken Invader, and not some nobody-dweller and some back-water planet!"
Dib stood dumbfounded for a moment, the look on his face dropping as if he had been injected with poison.
"You'd rather DIE, than stay here?"
"Yes," Zim answered coldly and methodically, as if he twisted in a knife, knowing how much it hurt Dib.
"Oh…oh that's just great, so frickin great!" The human said, throwing his hands in the air and chuckling with a mix of catharsis and disdain.
"So none of this mattered then? Not the years of grueling rivalry which we have finally managed to make something out of it, that isn't built on purely a need to hurt and humility each other! Not all the things we did together, the fun we had together, does none of that matter?! You're telling me you're not even happy, that all of that didn't even make you happy for a MOMENT?!"
After his outburst, he waited for Zim to answer, looking at him pleadingly. Behind those shining eyes, he noticed hesitation. Just enough to give him hope.
"It doesn't matter how I feel," Zim said, before quickly putting up barriers. "AND THAT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH WHETHER I HAVE ENJOYED MYSELF, WHICH I HAVE NOT!"
Dib looked silently at Zim, before speaking.
"Really?"
"Y-yes!"
"Yeah, sorry, don't believe it," Dib said mockingly, crossing his arms.
"YOU-WHY YOU-AHHH!" Zim exclaimed, slamming his head into his hands in frustration. Then, as a realization struck him, he looked up with a scornful stare in his eyes.
"WHY ARE YOU EVEN BEING SO ANNOYINGLY PERSISTENT DIB-TRASH! You wanted me off this planet myself!"
"WHY DO YOU THINK THAT?!"
"Oh, I don't know, maybe because YOU HELPED ZIM BUILD THE THING THAT WOULD ALLOW ME TO GO FIND MY TALLEST SO I COULD LEAVE!" He screeched accusingly.
"Ok, I did do that. BUT, I only went along when I thought you were going to go away and get some mission on a new planet. I didn't help, JUST SO YOU COULD GO AND GET YOURSELF KILLED!"
"HA! SO YOU DID WANT ME TO LEAVE!" Zim continued to accuse.
"NO, aren't you listening?! I did it because I thought it would be best for you!" Dib explained, hoping his words could get through that green bug's head for once. Most of all, because he knew where the argument was going if it continued. And he didn't know what he would do if it went there.
But it seemed inevitable, as Zim yelled, seeming ready to rip out his own antennas. His breathing had gone rapid, and his entire body seemed to irradiate with pent-up frustration. It was as if a conflict was building in him, ready to burst him open. He was rubbing his face and eyes as if trying to rip out his own emotions from his head. At that point, he seemed barely able to look at Dib, without the frustration causing his face to twist into a grimace of sheer exasperation. When he finally did look, the exasperation only turned more sour. With his fists in front of him, the claws curled in indignation, his breath leaving his body in heavy heaves, he spoke once more.
"Why. Is. It. So. IMPORTANT to you…what's best for Zim?" The alien asked, his words laced with skepticism and betrayal. As if Dib was lying straight to his face, that he was being insincere. It touched a nerve with Dib, who ended up speaking before thinking.
"DON'T YOU GET IT YET, YOU MORONIC, ALIEN BUG?! I-"
He was going so fast, filled with so much energy when he suddenly stopped and deflated, once he understood what he was saying. The change in demeanor was enough to make the alien seize up, looking with big eyes at Dib, unsure and fixated on what he was going to say next.
Dib's eyesight was getting blurry, and he was afraid he could fall down any second. He didn't feel ready to tell him. Not yet. But then again, he couldn't come up with a better moment to do it. He closed his eyes, and centered himself, as he imagined the words floating in front of him. Slowly, the things he wanted to say that had been foggy and unclear, turned solid and went together like a well-built foundation. It almost seemed silly that he fought against those words for so long. After all, he had said them more or less throughout their time together, or even in his actions. This time whoever, there would be no question of what he felt. In the end, the only thing that held him back was his fear of how Zim was going to react. But as the way things had turned out, it may be the only chance to reach him.
He looked at Zim, with an almost exhausted look in his eyes, as if he was a prisoner, finally freed.
"I…care, Zim. I care about you." He explained, and barely did the words leave his mouth before the next came tumbling out. "And not just how I can stop you, expose you, or gain something from you. No, I care about you, even when I know I would have to be insane to do so, BUT I DO! I really, really do."
Zim stood still, seemingly still trying to process Dib's words. But the human wasn't finished, now stuck in a torrent of emotion he had no way of slowing down.
"I never wanted you to leave. I can't imagine my life without you. Seriously, I have enjoyed almost getting shredded to pieces by your side, more than I would ever enjoy seeing you leave." Dib continued, chuckling nervously. It felt more like a dream than reality.
But there was Zim to pull him back on the ground, as the Irken's brow furrowed and his expression hardened.
"You lie." He slowly hissed, and yet he couldn't hide the shaking in his voice.
"I'm not, you have to believe me, Zim. Just this once, I need you to think I'm not lying, or tricking you. Cause…I need you to know that. That I care, that I want you here, THAT I NEED YOU!" He said, bordering on a yell. Then, slowly, something wet slid down his cheeks and landed on the floor. He didn't think about it and just quickly wiped his eyes clean.
"I need you, Zim-"
"You lie."
"-and I think you need me too-"
"L-LIES! ALL…lies…"
"-and somehow I've gotten delusional enough to think that you might care about me too!"
The words seemed to smack Zim like a slap in the face, causing his face to tremble with some unknown emotion.
"I…I CAN'T HEAR THIS! ZIM ORDER YOU TO STOP TALKING!" The alien stated, before turning completely around, leaving Dib to speak to his back.
"Zim, if you stay-"
"STOP TALKING!"
"-IF YOU STAY, WOULD IT BE SO BAD?! Couldn't you make something worth staying for?! SOMETHING WITH ME?! Cause you wouldn't be alone, Zim, I promise. Just as how you made it so I wasn't alone in this world anymore."
"NO!" Zim exclaimed, loud enough to finally make Dib back down, leaving the alien time to consolidate his defenses.
"Don't you get it?! There's NOTHING here for Zim! And there will never be anything but NOTHING!"
Though those had been the words, that Dib had feared the most, they didn't hurt him. Instead, they passed through him like empty air. And he felt a semblance of clarity, that was almost intoxicating.
"Cause Zim is NOTHING! Zim is NOTHING without the Tallest, and he will always BE NOTHING WITHOUT THEM!"'
Even as he tried to yell louder, he couldn't mask the broken speech that was filling his mouth. Dib didn't know if Irkens could cry, but he guessed if they could, Zim would be doing it at that point.
"So if they say I am NOTHING, and that I have to stay, THEN I WILL HAVE NOTHING! DO YOU GET IT, YOU MISCREATED WORMY FOOL?!"
An idea grazed up against Dib's mind, and he followed it like an instruction manual. Slowly, he started moving toward Zim, who was starting to bend over, his arms crossed and claws burrowing into his skin.
"ZIM IS NOTHING!"
Dib moved closer, halfway toward his target.
"ZIM HAS NOTHING!"
The human was almost there and spread his arms out.
"ZIM WILL NEVER-"
The alien was suddenly interrupted, as Dib's arms embraced him, holding him tight as if he were the most precious thing in the world. Meanwhile, Dib also rested his face against the side of Zim's head. The skin was surprisingly warm, with an almost fungi-like texture. Feeling the alien against his knuckles, was nowhere close to how he felt against his cheek. They stood there for a good, long time, letting the quiet of the moment set in. But as the seconds, passed, Dib opened his eyes and realized that they perhaps were standing for a little too long. Still, he didn't feel the need to let go.
"...What…is this?" Zim finally asked, his voice ripe with bewilderment.
"Um…It's called a hug. I'm pretty sure you know what that is." Dib replied, with a slightly awkward tone.
"Oh. R-Right." The alien replied hesitantly, as though that hadn't been his actual question.
They continued to stand there, rocking ever so slowly back and forth, in rhythm with their breaths.
"Why are you doing this Dib-thing?"
"I just thought you needed it," Dib said, sincerely.
"...This is strange. Even for you." Zim stated, even more sincerely.
"Yeah, you're probably right. Want me to let go?"
"..."
Zim's reluctant silence was all the words Dib needed, and he felt a warm spread through his body, as he slightly shuddered from the sensation. For some reason, the closeness calmed him, and his worries started to wash away. He liked to think Zim felt similar, as the alien got heavier, in tune with his legs giving in under him. Soon, Zim wasn't standing but instead relying on Dib for support. The human ended up slowly sitting down, worried that he was going to break his back if he continued standing like that.
Even if their difference in height had been minuscule, the gap was only proliferated as Zim sat on his legs, with Dib's head hovering over his shoulder. Usually, such a gesture would have caused Zim to lash out. But as it stood, he was simply taking in the experience, as if it was the weirdest thing he had ever experienced. In that, they felt the same way. Dib looked shortly back at the screen, theory blurred reflection showing in the black glass. While staring, he let his head rest on top of Zim's. There he started to think about all that had happened between them.
"How did we get here?" Dib asked, his voice hollow and tired.
"You think I know?" Zim asked slightly annoyed. "This wasn't exactly part of my master plan for world domination."
"It could have gone worse. We could have killed each other."
"You mean ZIM could have killed you and finally been freed from your INSUFFERABLE presence." The alien said, though he quickly took back his words.
"Not….that I would have wanted that."
Slowly and shakingly, Zim raised his arm and grabbed onto Dib's. His touch was reeking with nervousness as if he didn't know if it was allowed. But Dib didn't object.
"You wouldn't?"
"*Sigh* No. Zim has…gotten used to you. And is finding it hard to imagine this planet without you."
Those words weren't much, but it was all Dib had wanted to hear. He tucked harder at the alien, who was starting to feel squeezed in the human's arms.
"Can you let go now?!"
"Mmmm. No."
"What do you mean no?! Is…this…are you holding Zim hostage!"
"Technically not, but I would rather not let go until you say you'll stay," Dib replied teasingly, earning a miffed scoff from the alien. But as much as he would like it to be so, he knew he couldn't force Zim. Collecting himself, Dib prepared for a final assault, hoping to finally break through Zim's barriers.
"I know you think the best idea is just to go off and see whether you'll get blown to bits. But please, I just want you to consider staying. Would it be so hard to imagine?"
"Pff, staying. And what exactly would the mighty Zim do on a low-down planet, without being an Invader." The alien answered, already resigned to his fate.
"Come on, it's not like you've needed your Tallest approval to do HALF the crazy things you've done through the years. Seriously, nothing would need to change…but…" Dib stopped his sentence before finishing, which caught Zim's attention.
"But?"
"...Thinks could change. We can try new things, and do something else for a change. Just like we've been doing lately, even before the whole Tallest Tracker thing. And still, even if breaking into places isn't very high on my wish list for the weekends, that stuff has been some of the most fun I've had in a while. And I don't think it would have been as fun without you."
"Fun, hah! You think I have time for FUN?!"
"Oh, so you've been messing with me for all this time because it's been critically vital for your mission?"
"Yes! At least…most of the…shut up." Zim muttered, half-heartedly admitting defeat. Dib chuckled, but it was quickly followed by a long, and desperate sigh.
"Maybe you could, I don't know, give it a shot? Just for a while? If you're still miserable, then fair, maybe you would be better off as space debris. But could you give this stupid planet and me a chance? One chance, that's all I ask…just…one…"
Once again his words trailed off, and to the alien's shock, he felt Dib's head clinging to his, as he felt something wet against his skin.
"...I don't want you to go….I don't want you gone, not anymore…." Dib confessed between sobs, as the tears started rolling down his face, rubbing off on Zim. He didn't know why the dam broke or how to stop it. The tears just kept going, as it felt like he was getting a lifetime of worry and fear off his chest. The alien was just about to complain about getting fluids on him when the human moved and he caught a glimpse of Dib's face. He barely understood humans. But as he caught that glimpse, he knew what was going on. And it hurt him, in a way that was far different from the hurt the Tallest had given him. And yet, they were practically comparable in scope. He detested the feeling and realized it was Dib's fault, that it was him that was hurting him. He wanted to be mad, to have vengeance for the weakness the human had given him. But at the height of his boiling anger, he decided to embrace the weakness, just for a moment.
And then he understood how to make it go away.
Gaz was at home, lying on the couch. She was scrolling mindlessly on her phone, while the TV was blaring some nonsensical commercials. While Dib was gone, she had looked forward to some time alone, without a certain someone commenting on her doing nothing. If she was lucky, Dib would stay over at Zim for the rest of the day, leaving her in peace. Still, she wasn't too surprised when she heard the doorbell ring.
"Ugh, what now." She muttered, preparing for whatever Dib was going to distract her with.
She rolled off the couch and nonchalantly raised herself from the floor. While walking to the door, she wondered if she should start taking payment for always helping Dib deal with his life. It was certainly starting to become a habit. She might as well capitalize on that. Reaching the door, she swung it open and was entirely unsurprised to see Dib on the other side.
"Let me guess," She said, rolling her eyes before even looking at him. "You said something, or he said something, and now you two are-"
Gaz cut off her speech, just as she properly looked at Dib. The first thing she noticed was his slouched posture, which was usually a sign he was going through something. But most alarmingly, she noticed the red around his eyes, like he had been crying. And that was something she rarely saw.
"Dib…." She mumbled, feeling her legs weakening under her. "...did…did something happen-"
"HELLO TERRIFYING DIB-SISTER!" Zim exclaimed with his usual overly energetic tone, peaking from behind Dib. He waved at her, as Gaz changed from looking at him to Dib a few times.
She took in the scene for a moment, as Zim kept waving and Dib sniffed, his face bordering on crying again. Looking down and holding in a sigh of relief, she almost considered punching him for giving her such a scare. When she had collected herself and put on her uncaring demeanor, she looked Dib in the eyes again.
"Why do things always have to get so weird between you two?" Gaz asked, with an exhausted look.
"Gaz, I have to tell you something." Her brother stated, barely holding back a sob.
"WAIT." She declared, holding up a hand. Both Dib and Zim exchanged glances, as they waited for her to speak.
"...If we're doing this, you better get me a pizza, 'cause I was just enjoying myself, and I can tell this is gonna be a LONG conversation."
"*Sniff* Fair enough," Dib replied, wiping tears from his eyes.
"*Sigh*...You need some tissues?"
"That would be nice, yeah."
Back inside, they sat down in the kitchen and called for pizza. While waiting for it to arrive, Dib wiped his face clean and started explaining what they two had actually been doing, with Zim including enlightening commentary on the side. He told her the truth, that he had been helping Zim leave Earth, he had lied to her and had at that point committed several felonies. He wasn't very surprised when she reacted more to him lying to her than him being implicated in several crimes. On that part, he earned a proper punch in the arm and some colorful words. Once the pizza finally arrived she kept it to herself like a vying vulture and gouged it down.
"So," She said, after having Zim and Dib wait for her to finish her slice. "In short, you thought you were helping Zim leave when in actuality, he was planning to get killed in space."
"There is NO PROOF, that the Tallest were actually going to have Zim killed!" The alien interjected, earning a doubtful look from both Gaz and Dib.
"And then you found out, Zim freaked out, but you managed to convince him to stay." Gaz continued.
"More or less," Dib replied, in much better shape than before.
"And you lied to me, because?" She asked intensely, causing Dib to shift around in his chair nervously.
"I-I didn't know how you would take me helping Zim leave, alright!"
"Good call, 'cause that's the most stupid thing you could do." She stated matter of factly, taking another bite.
"Well, I was thinking about what was best for humanity-"
"Dude, you had a sleepover with him. If you really cared, you would have killed him in his sleep."
"I too, was disappointed that you didn't even ATTEMPT to take Zim's life," Zim commented with a disheartened head shake.
"Oh, really, you would have liked it if I tried?" Dib asked, looking at the alien with disbelief.
"I would have," Zim said, his eyes widening for a moment as if realizing something, before going back to normal.
"THAT DOESN'T MAKE IT BETTER!" Dib exclaimed.
"The only thing I don't understand," Gaz butted in to say, catching their attention. "Is how exactly you convinced Zim to stay? I wouldn't give this planet a higher rating than two."
"O-Oh, you know, I just gave him some really good arguments and-" Dib started explaining nervously before Zim interrupted him.
"The Dib-worm was leaking fluids from his fleshy eyeholes, and wouldn't stop unless I agreed to stay." The alien said, without sugarcoating it, much to Dib's embarrassment.
"Okay, maybe I cried a little bit, but it wasn't like I-"
"THEY WERE LEAKING! Seriously, Zim was worried I would drown in his disgusting eye-water."
"That's enough Zim, I don't think she-"
"It was like a fountain, and even worse, he was making these weird grunting sounds. So not only was I worried he had ruptured his eyeballs, I thought he was slowly dying, like a really slow, disgusting-"
"ZIM!" Dib yelled, as he tried desperately to make him stop talking.
They continued to argue for a while, with Gaz watching from the side, slowly finishing another slice. When they finally quieted down, it looked strangely like Zim seemed regretful. He then lit up with an idea and hopped over to Gaz with his chair, with both humans watching while confused. At Gaz's side, Zim leaned over and whispered to her.
"So, the otherwise brilliant Zim was wondering…" His words disappeared in whispers only the two of them heard, while Dib looked on.
"What are you two talking about?" He asked, starting to get worried. With good reason, as he for a single, minuscule moment, was sure he saw a smile flicker in the corner of his sister's mouth. But otherwise, she kept her intention well hidden and simply whispered back to Zim, who seemed perplexed. When she finally convinced him of whatever it was, the alien looked at Dib with an unsure expression and shrugged.
Before he could protest, Zim sat up and walked over to Dib with some unknown intention, grabbing his head in his hands.
"Um…Zim. What are you doing?" He asked, sincerely confused about what was going on.
All he saw, was Zim taking a breath, as if he was preparing for something. Then, the alien looked him right in the eyes, with a determined expression. He then moved his head closer, while forcing Dib's head down.
Oh, this is a joke, right? This is some kind of joke I'm not getting. Dib thought to himself, suddenly feeling powerless to do anything but follow Zim's lead.
Then, when it became clear what was happening, Dib tried to speak up. But before he could, with a quick motion, Zim forced their lips together. The alien had closed his eyes, leaving Dib to stare with wide eyes at his face, while his whole body froze. They stood there for several moments, as Dib felt the tip of Zim's tongue slightly brush against his, as the alien tried his best to emulate a kiss. It was a bit of a sloppy mess, but as a first kiss went, Dib couldn't complain.
Once Zim felt he had performed satisfactorily, he pulled away. Unused to the taste of the human, he ended up wiping his mouth with a grimace. He then looked at the utterly dazed Dib, who stared blindly into nowhere, a million thoughts running simultaneously in his head. The alien took his time studying Dib's expression closely, before commenting.
"This certainly was an…unusually squishy experience, if still disgusting. Though I'll admit, I do enjoy the face the Dib-thing is making." He explained, glancing with a gleeful grin at Dib.
"Yes, Zim does quite enjoy this method of leaving the Dib speechless. I need to test out this method more in the future. Look forward to more mouth-touching, human-worm!" Zim continued, still somewhat unsure of what exactly he had done. However, seeing his human like that was more than enough reward.
His attention was then caught by the blaring TV in the living room.
"Uuu, what's this!" He exclaimed, before walking off and leaving the temporarily brain-dead Dib behind.
Once he regained his faculties and ability to think, he immediately went bright red. If Zim had been there, he might have worried that the human was going to explode. He took his hand up to his lips, touching them gently. Meanwhile, Gaz sat at the other end of the table with a satisfied smile on her face.
"You…you…what?" Dib managed to ask in his bewildered state.
"Oh, he just told me he saw this thing on one of his shows, and wondered if it was how humans showed appreciation for each other. Technically, I didn't lie."
"I…I…I'm pretty sure I should be angry."
"Are you?" She asked with a coy grin, enjoying the frustrated look on Dib's face.
"...No." He admitted after a long sigh, before banging his head into the table. You could practically see the steam leaving his head, as he cooled down from his excessive blushing. He even let out an embarrassed groan, coming to terms with his first kiss not only being thanks to his sister but that it even happened right in front of her.
"Don't worry, I'm not gonna force you to thank me. I knew you two needed a little push."
Dib really wanted to come up with a witty reply, but words failed him. He ended up leaning back in his chair and staring up at the ceiling, running the fresh experience back in his head. At the start, he cringed. But as he thought more about it, butterflies started to flutter in his stomach.
"But, seriously. You and Zim, how's that looking?" Gaz ended up asking, with a tinge of concern hidden beneath her voice. Dib looked back, with his own concerned expression.
"I told him I wanted him to stay and that I….needed him. He agreed to try and stay and see if he'll like it. We didn't really get much farther than that."
"You're telling me he's still considering getting killed in space?"
"Maybe? You know how he is." Dib replied, before glancing over to Zim. Back in the living room, he had changed the screen and managed to start Gaz's console. Seemingly invested in her newest game, 'Starbusters 9: The re-revelations', he played with vigor, shouting at the TV at random intervals. Dib couldn't but smile, though his happiness was tempered by anxiety.
"All I can hope now is that I'll be good enough. That I can be a reason he would want to stay."
"Chill with the self-deprecation."
Dib took the words harshly and looked back at Gaz with a frown. But looking her in the eyes, he noticed an underlying thoughtfulness in her expression.
"You're more than enough, dude. And if Zim didn't like you, then he would have been gone a long time ago." She stated, as assured as one could be.
Dib felt a stab at his heart and tender tears bubbling to the surface. He ended up wiping his eyes, in an effort to hide his happy tears. But then, he gave her a thankful look, his smile radiating with newfound confidence.
"Thank you," Dib muttered though he felt more words would be fitting. But it didn't seem Gaz minded, taking a new bite.
"You're welcome."
In the living room, Zim had gotten louder, and Dib felt a need to check up on him.
"I better go. Don't want him to try and blow up our house again." He joked, before standing up, his body shaking, as if finally processing everything that had happened.
"You do that. And tell him if he breaks my controller, he better get me a new one." She yelled as Dib left the kitchen and walked over to the couch. There Zim sat, completely infatuated with the moving pixels on the screen. Dib leaned on the backrest, quietly watching Zim playing for a few seconds.
"Hey, can I try?"
"NO! Zim is busy!" The alien replied swiftly, not willing to look up from the game.
"Okay, but I'm taking the controller when you die, deal?"
"Ha! You got yourself a deal, Dib-thing! But know, that the AMAZING Zim is a master of all things and that I won't let some primitive human entertainment system get the better of-"
Zim was cut off as he made a mistake and the screen went black with 'GAME OVER' spelled in big letters.
"You were saying?" Dib asked, with a teasing grin. The alien didn't respond and instead stared at the TV with utter disbelief.
"Alright, I will be taking this-" Dib said, reaching for the controller. But before he grabbed it, ZIm pulled back dramatically.
"NO! THIS ISN'T FAIR! ZIM WOULD NEVER DIE, I'M NOT GONNA GIVE UP!"
"Zim, it's a game, just give me the controller already-"
"I WILL NOT BE DEFEATED BY THIS STUPID AMALGAMATION OF TECHNOLOGY YOU CALL A GAME!"
"Come one, just-give it to-ZIM GIVE IT HERE!"
Dib tried desperately to take the controller out of the alien's hands, who evaded once more, only to be grappled by Dib who jumped on him. On the couch they continued to wrestle, pushing and pulling, while yelling at each other. Back in the kitchen, Gaz had leaned her head toward the living room and stared at them fighting. She took another bite, finding it adorable that they hadn't realized that they both were smiling. And smiling they were. Between the shouting and the fighting, they would grin with a gleefulness that was otherwise completely alien to the two. Only together, did they ever smile like that.
Gaz took another bite and nodded to herself, like a painter looking at their finished masterpiece.
"About time."
Wow. Just…wow. This is it, I'm afraid. The final chapter in this long story. I've had smaller stories before, but this was the big one, that I have worked on for almost three years. I can't describe how much all your comments have meant to me, how a single notification has made my day. I just want to thank you all for taking the time to read this story. I don't think I really expected it to become as popular as it is.
But at the same time, it felt like time to put an end to this tale. It has already gone on FAR LONGER than I thought it would. And honestly, I've started to lose track. I don't think I could have continued without having to come up with stuff on the spot and forgetting everything that had come before. Rather, I reached what I planned to be the finale, and wanted it to end there as it was meant to. For all the support you given, you deserved an ending I would be proud of. And so, this long journey has been finished. Again, thank you, and I hope you've enjoyed this story of mine. I wish you a good day. Goodbye.