Wizard of Orario

by Xane Dragon

Harry Dresden is banished from earth thanks to a death curse. When he returns, he finds himself alone in a world that has changed in more ways than one, and few of them good. So, he goes back to his familiar job. He doesn't do parties, love potions, or magic tricks. But he can find people, even when they're lost in a dungeon.

6. Chapter 6

Adventurers were prone to party. However, they weren't particularly party animals. They didn't have some unexplainable urge to get drunk and make a lot of loud noises. The need for celebration came from the fact that for half of them, their day jobs involved risking their lives deep inside the dungeon to obtain magic stones and other valuable drops. The other half never got above level one and stuck to the first ten floors, so the danger level was much lower, but still there when something unexpected happened underground, like how occasional harsh weather caused an extreme loss of property and even lives above ground.

When a group came back from the dungeon, they needed to celebrate the fact they were still alive. So they washed the taste of high protein rations out of their mouths with heavy drinks and food that cost several times as much as it did if you managed to get lunch at the Hostess. Some people would grumble, but Mia would also point out that the repair bills were higher on nights adventurers got rowdy.

When a group needed to celebrate an accomplishment, like when Bell leveled up the other day, they would all come to buy food and drink before doing their best to show off to everyone else around them. At least, his friends would try to show him off. Bell mostly just sat with his head down, his cheeks as red as his eyes from what I saw before I had to deal with the newest complication in my life.

And when a group was about to head out into the dungeon, they would come to the Hostess for a large dinner the night before to make sure they had plenty of energy for the next morning. Plus, although nobody had thought of the old saying, the adage of 'eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow we die!' still held.

Which was why Bell had come in with his supporter on top of the new child and I was serving him drinks.

"So, you're going deeper into the middle floors tomorrow?" I asked the boy with the white hair and red eyes as I got inside his personal space to refill his drink. Non-alcoholic of course. The other girls tried to push booze on some kids, but I still remembered the old science about human brain development and the long term problems that could cause.

Although the new batch weren't exactly the same as the old humans, they were close enough that getting plastered at fourteen was a bad idea. Plus, he was going deep into the dungeon tomorrow morning and needed to be at his best. I wanted Bell to face challenges that only had a good chance of killing him so he could grow into a more worthy man, not insurmountable annoyances that tended to add up and get more people killed than anyone wanted to admit, like a hangover.

Of course, the boy who might as well have been blind to all the hints I dropped him just gave me a nervous grin. "Yeah, we're going to see if we can get past floor twelve."

The brown haired little pallum sitting next to him, the one trying to disguise herself as a very short dog girl with pointed ears that looked more like a cat's due to some basic transformation magic, gave me a glare before I took a step away from the boy. I didn't know what caused Lilly's change in demeanor around my Bell, but she was acting much friendlier and possessive towards him in the past few weeks.

That was the problem with finding a desirable man. Other women wanted him too, and getting rid of them was becoming more of a challenge for me. Sending my followers to warn that girl Bell had a crush on to back off with a little violence hadn't worked as well as I had hoped, and I couldn't bring myself to do the same to someone as weak as Lilly. These things would go a lot more smoothly for me if I hadn't developed an annoying moral code that tended to get in the way of me getting what I wanted this past decade.

Speaking of whom…

I looked over to the fake chienthrope and held up the pitcher of juice. "Refill Little Ms Adventurer?"

The tiny pinprick of an insult just made her little glare fiercer, which just increased her cuteness instead of making her look more threatening. But, I wasn't about to let her off for past crimes. Her attraction to my man aside, Lilly had tried to steal a borderline divine weapon from Bell that had to have cost his broke goddess one hell of a favor from a smithing deity. It was only thanks to Ryu spotting it in the hands of the little thief that Bell got it back.

The fact that she had a severe regret for her actions that kept me from exposing her. Children that learned from their mistakes and tried to better themselves were a bit of a weak spot for me. So, I had three reasons not to do more than give her a little tease, since Bell would be sad if she suffered something worse.

"Yes, thank you," Lilly said in a curt tone before holding out her cup.

I looked over to the third member of their party and frowned. The boy looked familiar with his short red hair and gray eyes. Technically, he was more than a year into full adulthood at seventeen years, but everyone was a child to me. "And you Mr…ah…" I hinted as I held up my pitcher with a bright smile.

More boys were always welcome around my Bell. They could run interference to snatch up unwanted girls and provide assistance in not dying when things got a little out of control. Like when Freya may have released some monsters in town to cause trouble, or sent her right hand warrior to train up a minotaur before sending it after the boy.

Whatever he said was lost on me in the din of the full pub as I noticed the main door open and a man had to duck to get inside with his oversized walking stick.

Dresden made a much better impression when he wasn't looking like a drowned rat. Although, he needed a new coat. The rag he was wearing was only allowed to stay on him because of the heavy enchantments covering the whole thing. With defensive reinforcements that were made to stop bullets, I didn't think he had to worry about getting knifed in the back by anyone short of a level 6. The kinetic redistribution part of it could use a bit of work since swords took up a larger area than a tiny metal rock.

I let my displeasure show on my face as he tried to just walk past me without acting like anything was wrong. "You're late."

The way he put his shopping bag further back as he looked at me told me so much I didn't need to see how his soul became a little cloudy with nervousness. A soul that was a tiny bit weathered from what I had seen this morning.

That worried me a lot. Souls were the most precious things in the world. I had thrown away my concerns when I saw his damage wasn't permanent after we did some good deeds to repair it. Anything could have happened to him on the Outside, after all. The fact that he wasn't contaminated was enough of a miracle for me not to question a little spiritual wear and tear.

But now, I saw how foolish that idea had been.

"After those guild lectures, I went to one of the old cathedrals after some shopping and lost track of time," Dresden told me. It was an honest answer, but he must have been a complete idiot to think I wouldn't pick up on the lack of activity at one of the most deserted places in town.

I gave him an overly dramatic sigh. "Well, you make me worry. Orario isn't exactly the safest place in the world." Which was pure truth. There was a reason I didn't raise too many objections to my invisible bodyguards and did everything I could to team up with Ryu to do errands as to provide an illusion of a protector so the girls at the pub didn't ask questions why a cute girl like me didn't get snatched up off the street.

"Okay, okay," he said while doing his best to ward off my concern with his hand while holding his staff while keeping the brown shopping bag away from me.

Just what was in there that he didn't want me to see?

Well, that would be easy enough to find out once I got a minute to myself.

"You were at the guild?" Bell's question put an end to our discussion and made me remember where I was. I gave the boy with the red hair an apologetic smile and moved around to refill his drink as my little Bell took over the conversation in less than a second. "What for?"

He reached over and pulled out the seat, offering the man a chair that Dresden took after giving me a wary look for a fraction of a second. "Going over those dungeon lectures," he said before letting out a sigh. "Honestly, if they need to have someone teach a class about the dungeon. They should get someone who doesn't stutter as much."

I moved away but kept the table in my view as I went to get a menu for Dresden and moved around the room to take care of all the other customers. "Dungeon lectures, so…you already have a new familia?" Bell asked, making the other two members of the table pay more attention. A new adventurer wasn't very interesting. People like that came to Orario all the time, but someone who had switched familia but still needed to attend lessons on the dungeon was a logic problem that even had evesdroppers turning their heads to openly pay attention.

"Did you meet up with Hestia?" Bell asked, his soul showing an odd mix of hope and skepticism. The poor boy really wanted more people in his familia.

"No," Dresden said before I put the menu down in front of his face before giving Bell an apologetic laugh.

I couldn't let him say anything stupid in front of the gods currently in the bar. So, I just lied for him thanks to the disguise magic I used that gave me the ability to do so in front of gods as long as we were in the mortal realm and they were without their full powers. "I'm afraid another god beat Hestia to it. He met up with a hunting goddess in the bar early this morning. Turns out they knew each other and she gave him a new falna before heading out to do a job for the Guild," I said apologetically before smiling. "He did get a level up from all the experience he got after leaving his first familia! So she told him to spend some time adjusting to it and gain some experience in the dungeon and they would meet up when she comes back in the Winter."

I could hear the dozen or so people bothering to listen in, including gods, start to mumble amongst themselves.

"Artemis got a new guy?"

"But, she only takes girls!"

"I heard she stopped by yesterday morning because of some request from the Guild."

"Aww man! I wanted to get a look at her. She always wears those super short skirts!"

And in three months when she did come back to town, the rumor would be so twisted that Dresden could just claim people had heard wrong. Or truthfully say it wasn't Artemis. There were other goddesses associated with hunting after all, like Meilikki.

"So, you're a level two mage?" Lilly asked, her interest obvious peeking at the information. Between the three members of her party, I was certain the only attack magic in their arsenal was the Fire Bolt spell I had arranged for Bell to learn.

This time, Dresden had the presence of mind to keep his mouth shut long enough for Bell to chip in on the conversation. "No. If he got a new level, that would make him a level four."

Which was a generous estimate from what I could see. His magical ability was certainly around that level. The boy could probably level a good-sized building if he wanted to. But as far as physical ability went, I wouldn't have put him beyond a level two. Then again, only stupid wizards tried bashing something with magic to destroy it. Dresden's power was far more subtle and dangerous than a mage who stood around lit up like a Christmas tree in the middle of a battlefield while spouting several lines of diction to cast a spell.

The table went silent enough for Dresden to look up from his menu and I got ready to step in before he could put his own foot in his mouth. "Something wrong?"

"Well so much for getting a new party member," Lilly said as she slumped in her seat.

"Yeah, level four just going as deep as us would defeat the whole point of me wanting to come along," the redheaded man told them.

Dresden managed to hide his confusion, but Bell opened his mouth. "What's wrong with that?"

After leaning forward, Lilly slapped her hands on the table. "Are you kidding Master Bell?" Lilly asked in anger. "He's as high as all three of our levels combined! At the very least, that entitles him to half the loot, and his pick of the drops!"

"Not to mention a mage of that level would blow up most of the monsters we run into before I could even get a hit in," the redhead added with a dismissive wave of his hand. "Which defeats the point of me wanting to come along."

Dresden looked back and forth between the two adventurers. "Um…by the way…who are you guys?"

Both of Bell's companions blinked and took a moment to look embarrassed while I took care of another table next to them.

"Liliruka, but my friends just go with Lilly," the girl at the table said.

"Welf," the redhead added.

Which was enough for me to put two and two together in my mind to remember why he seemed so familiar as I made it to Manna Mia and put in his order. A few years ago, there was a big uproar in Rakia because one of the Crozzo family with a talent for making extremely powerful magic swords had run away. I didn't know all the details, but rumors said that Ares had been so angry he injured a goddess to the point her arcanum failsafes activated and sent her back to Heaven.

"Harry Dresden," the wizard said, completing the ritual of introduction as I got back to their table with his order before giving a quick scan of the room to see if any of the gods had a thoughtful look on their face.

"Well I ain't never heard of ya!"

Dresden slumped and I rolled my eyes as a man without a shirt that had been in the bar more than long enough to get drunk slowly got to his feet while the two other men at his table chuckled among themselves. Across the room, I saw Anya catch sight of the man and start moving through the maze of patrons and tables.

For his part, Dresden groaned before he looked over to the man with a bored expression. "Seriously? You're really going to do this?"

"Do what?" the man I recognized as Greggor said. From what I remembered, he was a level one adventurer that rarely went below the fourth floor with his drinking buddies. The man was one of several working man's adventures that came to Orario in hopes of an easy buck with the help of a falna, but didn't have the courage to risk his life in a real battle for money.

Dresden stood up and threw out his arms. "Being a cliche, man! Being a cliche!" he said loudly before gesturing wildly towards Greggor. "I mean, look at yourself! You're drunk, you're not even wearing proper clothes, and I'm guessing you've got some self esteem issues."

The man began to fidget nervously. "Well…"

"So you get the idea in your head. That this guy's not so great, and I can make myself feel better by beating him up, and maybe look better in front of all these gods, right?" Dresden went on. But before the man could agree, he kept going on. "But they don't want to see any of that. Do any of you want to see any of that?"

All of the gods he spun around to address slowly spoke up.

"No."

"Not really."

"I just came to eat and stare at pretty girls."

"I do!"

"SHUT UP MAGNI!" a nearby goddess shouted before she slapped the muscular god with the beer belly on the back of the head.

Thanks to the gods' responses, everyone in the pub, absolutely everyone had quieted down or come out from the back rooms to pay attention to the performance going on in front of them. And…Anya didn't look the slightest bit interested in stopping the…whatever was going on.

Spinning back around to face the man, Dresden gestured towards the man again with open palms. "And what am I supposed to do about all this, huh? If we fight and I win, I'm just the big guy picking on the little guy!"

The drunk thought about it for a moment with great effort before he gave Dresden a bright smile. "Does that mean you're gonna let me win?"

Dresden paused for a moment, and sighed. "Well, if I went and did that for you, then I'd have to let everyone who decided to try and start a fight with me in a bar win. I can't be unfair to all the other guys just because you got the idea to do it first, right?"

"...well, I guess not," Greggor admitted.

The wizard sighed and patted the man on the back. "So, what're we gonna do, man?"

Showing his less than incredible intellect, Greggor shrugged.

"Okay, tell you what," Harry went on. "We'll have a fight. No, a duel. All nice and proper. None of this barfight kind of stuff. You can sober up, clean yourself up, get a good night's rest. No, a day and two nights of rest, then meet me uh…hey, anybody here know a good dueling spot around town?"

"The amphitheater!"

"The aqueduct!"

"The coli-wait, do we have a coliseum? How can we not have a coliseum?"

"We have a coliseum you idiot! Go more than three blocks from your house for once!"

"That big empty lot next to the abandoned western cathedral!"

Dresden looked away from the drunk and in the direction of his table with a frown. "That one!" he said before turning his attention back to Greggor. "We'll meet there two nights from now, and have our duel, okay?"

"Uh…okay?" the man replied.

"Good! Shake on it!"

After the handshake was exchanged, the drunk sat back down at his table while Dresden went back to his table to take a long drink of water. "How do guys like that even get a god's blessing?"

Chloe got to the table before I could and thanks to those ears on her head, she had already heard the question. "In my experience, it's pity. Many people think it will make their lives easier, and for most it does. The extra strength and stamina certainly helps in harvesting crops, meow. But for some, they try to challenge the dungeon without the pawper amount of will."

Dresden sighed and rubbed his head before he went about eating some of his dinner before talking. "So, before that happened, what were we going on about?"

"Us not letting you tag along to charge us half our take in the dungeon," Lilly told him.

"Right," Dresden agreed before he looked over to Bell again. He actually studied him so long, the white haired boy started to look nervous and I started seeing my own red flags popping up around Dresden. "Okay look, I know I'm beating a dead horse here, but I still think you're too young for this stuff."

The Crozzo boy cleared his throat. "Hey, it's ability that determines the value of an adventurer, not age."

I started to come closer to interrupt the coming argument as Mr Dresden spoke up. "I do not doubt the courage of his heart, merely the length of his arm," he said before looking over to Bell. "You're fourteen, and the most you've gotten out of life so far has been inside a giant cave."

I got even closer as my mind began to see the horrifying place this was going.

"Take some time to enjoy life. Go see a play."

And closer, until I was just behind him.

"Take Syr out on a date!"

And…then I froze. Say what? my mind managed to ask.

And then, things got worse.

Anya practically teleported in behind the boy. "Mew should totally do it Bell!"

That's not what I want, I tried to tell them.

Then came Chloe to Bell's left as the boy sat there stunned and unable to speak. "Yes. She'd love to go out with you."

But it's too soon, I told myself.

Then came Luniore to address me, cutting off my route to try and put a stop to the incoming trainwreck by laying her hands on my shoulders and all but stopping me from moving. "Don't worry about your shift, Syr. We'll cover for you."

"I…um…" Bell managed to say as he looked around wildly at the girls ganging up on him while Lilly just gaped at the scene in quiet rage.

After that, came the final nail in the coffin. I could see it coming a mile away, but could do nothing to stop it beyond using powers that would defeat the whole point of me passing myself off as a waitress. The only free area around Bell filled up with the fourth and final waitress of the Host of Fertility. Ryu's presence managed to cast a shadow over the younger adventurer that had him shrinking in on himself. "Mr Cranell," Ryu spoke in an even voice that froze the boy in fear. "Are you telling me that after all the interest Syr has shown in you, all of the lunches she has prepared over the past several weeks, that you will not allow her to enjoy your company in a private setting?"

I loved Ryu. She was my best friend. Someone that I had honestly grown closer to than anyone in over ten thousand years. Her happiness was the most important thing in the world to me. And I was seriously considering tracking her down after she reincarnated to ensure her next life was full of nothing but joy.

But if a single one of my followers had been in the pub at that moment, I would have had them BEAT HER TO DEATH!

"Oh-Okay," Bell managed to say despite the nervousness in his body nearly causing him to shake himself out of his chair. Then he looked at me. "Um, I've got to go to the dungeon tomorrow, but uh…three days. How about we um…g-go then? That'll give me time to get…ready?"

Okay, I can salvage this, I told myself before taking in a deep breath. I could step in, be nice and gentle, shoo the girls away from him and…what? Turn him down?

His opinion of me as a person would go up, but I would forever be the friendly bar girl that was never really serious about anything!

"Well, not exactly what I had in mind," Dresden mumbled before looking at me. "But I suppose a reason to come back is better than nothing. That sound good to you, Syr?"

I needed to play this right. Giving Dresden a death glare would ruin the moment. To Bell, I was just as forced into this as he was. If I could manage to maneuver things correctly, I could set myself up to be a girl who was just as nervous about the whole thing, but get him to seriously consider me as someone to start a real relationship with instead of that terminally blank slate of a girl that he was usually gushing over because she apparently saved his life this one time.

"Oh, um…I guess I'll…see you then?" I asked with a healthy dose of nervous sweetness.

-Dresden-

"That the hell was that?!"

I looked up from the book I was reading to find an upper half of an irate goddess of service glaring at me through the hole in the attic floor. "Um…you're going to have to be more specific. You can't just walk into a door an hour after an event and ask a question out of the blue like no time has passed at all."

"You know what I'm talking about." Syr accused before she stomped all of the way up into the attic and glared down at me. "What happened downstairs!"

Once again, I did my best to pretend not to know what she was talking about. "Downstairs? A lot of stuff happened downstairs. But that was nearly an hour ago. I've been up here since I got done eating and said goodbye to the kids," I said before faking concern. "Oh no! Did something happen to that young boy, Bell?"

The smoldering volcano that was Syr rumbled as it prepared to erupt. "It's too soon for me to go on a date with him," she grumbled as she crossed her arms and increased the volume of her voice. "And what happened to that, he's too young for you, junk you were spouting before, huh?"

I looked away from the goddess that honestly looked more cute than angry, and found a nice wall to hold my attention. "Well…if I have to choose between you dating a child and a child playing around in a death trap, I'll pick you taking the kid out on a date," I told her before my voice became a bit more serious. "You're too good a person to really do anything bad, so…"

Syr snorted. "Your approval won't save you from my wrath," she told me evenly. When I looked back at her, the eyes of the goddess narrowed. For a fraction of a second, they went down to the area beneath my cot, where sheets hid the shopping bag with Bonnie's failed headpiece. Then, she looked back to me. "What're you hiding in your jacket?"

My whole body switched to red alert and it took everything I had not to flinch at the callout, or look back behind me where my lather duster hand been casually wrapped up in my duster before I tossed it in a corner. "That's…um…nothing…that I uh…want you to see," I told her as I tripped over my words. Gods could tell if mortals were lying, but I had no idea how far that went. Was it just like a little tingle, or did they get something like a corrected sentence floating above our heads that told them what we were hiding?

Syr gave me a glare for several seconds. Then, she looked down at the cot I was sitting on and kicked it.

The way she kicked it was the problem. She kicked it in the fold out legs in the absolute perfect way that the half that was supposed to be supporting my head crashed to the ground and sent me falling towards my side to hit my head on the wall. Before I had even hit the wall, she jumped over me to grab the jacket and started to rummage through it as I recovered and grabbed at her to get the back of her uniform.

Unfortunately, by the time I pulled on her with next to no leverage, Syr was already pulling something out of my coat and all my efforts did was help her move back to elbow me in the face a lot harder than someone who could only weigh ninety pounds soaking wet should have been able to manage. Then, we both tumbled backwards and I ended up with her butt on the side of my face, pressing my head onto the floor before she went absolutely rigid.

"You've got to be kidding me," her dumbfounded voice rang in my ears.

"What?" I groaned out from underneath the goddess.

Syr carefully got up and stepped away from me, allowing me to stand up before I turned around to see the little goddess holding the spearhead.

Old fashioned spear heads are bigger than most people think. The length of the one the goddess had was over eighteen inches. It looked more like a shortsword in Syr's hand rather than something that belonged on the end of a very long stick. Especially with the gold wrapping around the center of the aged metal.

"Where in the world did you get this?" she demanded.

I sighed and slumped a little before I found myself relaxing just the tiniest bit. Since she wasn't cackling like a Saturday morning cartoon villain and going on about how she could take over Earth, I didn't think I faced a doomsday scenario. "Well, it wasn't Vienna," I told her before Syr looked up to glare at me. "I had it on me when I was banished. I used it as an athame in a ritual to imprison a titan. Tried to imprison, she suicided herself to death curse me, remember?"

Syr looked back down at the weapon and…sighed before she put the cot back up and moved the supports back in place to put it on my sleeping arrangement. "Well, it's useless without an angel inside of it," she told me before turning around to frown at me again. "But don't let anyone else catch you with it. That thing would raise far too many questions if another god spotted it."

"...wait, you're not going to take it for yourself, or something?" I asked.

"Why would I-" Syr began to ask, then she groaned and rolled her eyes. "Are you just standing around, waiting for me to turn evil now?"

Somehow, I found myself feeling guilty as the technically innocent girl glared up at me. It didn't help that I was also wearing a tiny hypocrite badge since, for the better part of six years, I was considered a ticking time bomb by other wizards that were just waiting for me to turn into a real warlock. Not the DnD kind everyone in this town was, a real one that made pacts with demons for power and abused magic. "...maybe," I admitted.

Syr reached up to rub her forehead. "Well, you are from Winter. I guess that's to be expected. Everything under Skuld's kind are nothing but predators," she said with a sigh before looking back up at me. "So, what else did you try to sneak in tonight without me noticing? That thing's been on you since you got here, but I know you wouldn't have been that on edge tonight if you didn't have something else. Something you got tonight. What is it?"

I found myself wondering just how in the hell this had happened. Syr was the one who had barged in, rummaged through my stuff, and kicked up the fuss, yet I was somehow feeling guilty about trying to make sure she wasn't my only source of information to the world at large. I felt like a kid that had swiped something from a candy store and gotten half-caught. Mom knew I did something, but didn't quite know what that something was. That was some grade A manipulation there.

That realization put me back on good moral footing to resist her. "Are you going to make me tell you?"

The question must have hit a real sour spot. Not the kind that just pisses someone off, but the extra tender below the belt kind of sore that is against the rules to hit in civilized society. Syr gave me a hurt look for a moment before turning her head away. "No," she said with a sigh as her body slumped. "I'd never do something like that."

Aaaaaand, now I was feeling even worse. It wasn't fair that the creature in front of me looked young and innocent. Personal experience told me time and time again that the thing pretending not to be what she really was usually turned out to be all kinds of trouble. I could even understand why she was doing it. I was the last real wizard, as far as I knew. The new magic system Ryu had used was flashy and impressive, but unless I missed my guess, it was more or less pre-programed magic inserted into their falna. An actual wizard could come in handy.

"Alright," the goddess said with a long sigh. "Answer me this, and I'll leave you alone." She looked back at me with a tired expression. "What exactly have I done since we met to make you so distrust me that you're not willing to tell me what you've been up to in the city?"

I opened my mouth to tell her off and…stopped.

There was the fact that she was lying to everyone who saw her. Gods in this city walked around with an aura that let everyone just know what they were. I don't think as many people were as sensitive to it as me, but it still put me on edge to see multiple walking nukes at a table. I'm not exaggerating. Creatures with the amount of power they had could easily level the city we were all standing in as well as the surrounding countryside with one shot and have gas to spare.

But…that was a little too petty for me. I sure as hell wasn't walking around broadcasting the fact that I was an old fashioned wizard. While it wasn't like thirty Mabs walking around, I wasn't stupid enough to think that every divine being in the city was as upfront as…

I refused to let that thought form. Syr had to be up to something that amounted to more than just wanting to hang out and play pretend human! Nothing else made sense!

It was like a fairy king that was a fanatical baseball enthusiast!

Or a bigfoot that tried to be a passable long-distance father.

Like an emotional vampire making a living as a hair-stylist.

Then there was the possible angel that ran a bar…

All of whom were decent people.

Well, the Tylwyth Teg's king had cursed the Cubs because of the goat incident. But, my point still stood. Most people thought of supernatural beings as these unknowable creatures that did things according to their own logic, and for the most part, they were right. But every now and then, like say…one god out of a whole city of them, you found one that wanted to be more human than the others.

Despite my reservations, I sighed and sat on the cot after setting it back up right and moving the Lance of Longinus out of the way. "Bonnie, come and say hello."

Behind me, I could feel a bit of energy collect and a small young woman flew up over my shoulder to give a little wave. "Hello," she said as a pair of insect-like wings buzzed behind her. Which made me a little confused. Hadn't those been angelic wings, before?

Syr turned back around to cross her arms and frown at me again. "Dresden, don't try to distract me with your little spirit. I want to know what you were doing tonight that you thought was so important you needed to hide it from me."

I looked at Syr in disbelief, then held my hands up to gesture to Bonnie. "That! I was doing that!"

"Ew!" Bonnie exclaimed in disgust before she fluttered away from me. "I got a lot of kinks, old man. But that is not one of them!"

As I looked at Bonnie in disbelief, Syr gave me a little snicker. "Oh, it's short girls that appeal to you?"

This was not going to be a conversation I was getting involved with. "No! I summoned a spirit of intellect because I needed to find out…well, a lot of things!"

"I could have told you a lot of things," Syr pointed out.

I frowned back at her. "Yes, you. And only you. Call me out on it if you want, but you being my only information pipeline that I can use without looking like a complete idiot for asking the wrong question is a little too limiting, okay?"

Syr reached up to stroke her chin for several seconds before she looked over to Bonnie and stared at her for several seconds. "...I suppose you have a point," she said. "It certainly beats going to the public library."

As much as it killed me, I actually found myself waiting for Syr's next words, actually hoping for her approval of my actions. Well, approval was too strong a word.

Permission?

I wasn't someone to get anybody's permission to do anything.

If I had to sum up what I was feeling, I just wanted her to not raise a fuss over Bonnie's presence because…well…in the time since I had bothered summoning the spirit, my opinion of her had gone from something like 'helpful nuisance that I didn't want to be angry with me' to 'mostly okay person I didn't want to piss off'.

"Have I really been that smothering?" she finally asked.

-Syr-

I had to stifle a yawn as I slowly raised the ladder to the attic up to close it. Dealing with that wizard boy was starting to become a real annoyance. Now, he had a spirit of intellect I needed to take care of as well. That would mean getting a proper spirit vessel and a backup. Those brothers of mine were good enough craftsmen to forge a proper container, but I'd need to write down the runes for them to etch into the artifacts myself.

Honestly, if the boy would just tell me these things… I thought to myself before my inner monologue came to an end. I'd…what? Turn him down? Tell him how much of a bad idea he was having?

He was still so untrustworthy!

It was all just so…normal? Refreshing? Annoying?

I groaned as I reached up to rub my shoulder. I hated having conflicting emotions in regards to a man. Once Dresden had enough experience in Orario that he wasn't going to get swallowed up by the undercurrents, I was going to make him pay for all the stress he caused me tonight! Watching him squirm a little under my boot would go a long way to alleviating my annoyance.

"Syr, you're still here?"

The controlled voice from behind nearly had me jump out of my skin. But after managing to keep myself under control, I turned to look back and found Ryu standing in the hallway with me. She was fresh from the shower and her hair was still slightly damp, dressed in her pajamas. The pink silky fabric looked adorable on the little girl.

I gave her a tiny laugh. "Yes, Mr Dresden was going over the details of his business idea with me and…I think I may be taking afternoons off for the next few weeks to give it a try and help him network and get things started."

Ryu stood there silently for a minute, and I didn't need to see deeper than her skin to know she was conflicted about something. I could have just said my goodbyes and quickly made a departure, but if I did, it would only worry the elf. I didn't want to give her an even more troubled mind. To say nothing about how I was worried about her as well.

"Okay, what's wrong?" I finally asked.

"Syr, ever since I've known you…I've never…"

I sighed as Ryu rubbed her arm uncomfortably and looked away from me. I could see the guilt building up in her and could easily guess what she was building to. Ryu didn't like talking about her past and asking me about mine might as well have been cheating as far as she was concerned. "What's wrong?" I prompted again.

Ryu just got more uncomfortable. "I've never asked you about your past…"

"Oh-kay," I drawled out slowly. "But now you're going to."

"It's just…you've been acting strange since he showed up," Ryu finally told me. "You're talking about things that I've never even heard of and doing things I wouldn't have imagined three nights ago. I've heard spirit-controlled territories are different from lands under the protection of a god. Stricter."

I pressed my lips together as I started to get a little worried. Sometime between the casino and tonight, Ryu had been looking into Arctis Tor. That was going to be a bit of a problem. I hated Winter because of my history with the Crone back in the old world, not for anything recent. I hadn't actually bothered to learn what Mab was doing up north when everyone got done deciding who owned what in the mortal realm. Which made my knowledge hundreds of years out of date.

If Ryu started asking questions, I had no idea how to answer them even halfway truthfully.

"Well…you know those gnomes that run the public library, they're biased," I told her nervously as I imagined just what they could have spoken to Ryu about. That was the only place in Orario I could have thought of her going to get information on any Spirit-related subjects. The place was run by gnomes after all. When all I could imagine about any conversation she had with a fae from Summer was a catastrophe, I gulped down my fears and looked at the woman eye to eye. "So, what did you ask around about?"

Ryu took a deep breath and gave me a sympathetic look. "I know the great spirit in charge of the northern lands forces her subjects to swear an oath of obedience and that oaths sworn to spirits are magically binding," she told me. "Which means you either found a loophole to get away, or you are here under orders from Queen Mab."

The tension in my body melted away in a second. If Ryu had poked around about the Winter Knight, the problems that came from her just knowing the position existed would have been without number. I actually couldn't help but giggle. "What? You think I'm a spy?" I asked between tiny laughs. "Oh yes, I hear all kinds of important information between passing out food and scrubbing toilets."

"The word I was going to use was, informant," Ryu told me evenly.

The giggles stopped. I blinked at the girl and licked my lips nervously as Ryu kept talking. "There are things about you that don't add up. They never did. But I kept my mouth shut. Because I didn't have any right to ask about your past, considering my own."

I took in a little breath. Unlike the vast majority of the people in the city, I knew Ryu's past very well. The only surviving member of the Astraea Familia, her family had run into an ambush several years ago, with Ryu being the only surviving member. Her goddess left the city to establish herself somewhere else while Ryu stayed behind. Free from the moral obligations that the Goddess of Justice had imposed on her, Ryu had hunted down every member of the organization that killed her familia and got revenge in whatever way she could.

There were no honorable duels or arrests made. Poison, arson, and straight up murdering some of them in their sleep was how Ryu dealt with an organization that made Orario so unsafe people were afraid to go out on the street at night. For an elf, the most prideful race the gods ever created, those actions weighed on her far more than they would have on anyone else.

"Please, tell me what's going on," she pleaded.

I licked my dry lips while trying to think of what to say to her. It would have been so much easier if things hadn't become so complicated with this stupid pub. This was supposed to be a little playground for me to forget who I really was in, not what it had become. And lying to Ryu would have been so much easier if she were still just a broken little toy I found on the side of the street instead of my best friend.

But she's not your best friend, reality whispered in the back of my mind.

"I can't," I told her softly before turning my head away from her. Being honest, it would destroy the little house of cards I had built.

Ryu didn't stop. She reached out to lightly touch my shoulder, stopping me from following through with my body. It was another thing that made our connection special, or maybe I was lying to myself and it was just my divinity showing through. Elves hated touching people, but she never had a problem with me.

"Why not?" she asked softly. "I swear, if you're in danger, we'll get you out of it. All of us will."

Panic exploded in my mind and I looked back to her. "Have you been talking to the others about this?"

Ryu gave me a sympathetic look. "Just Mama Mia," she said. "She told me to drop it."

I gave her a relieved sigh. "Ryu…nobody is in danger," I lied. "There's just some unexpected things going on. Once Dresden is moved out and gets things on his end going, everything can go back to normal. I promise."

The best pleading expression I could manage made the elf hesitate. Then, her expression turned sad. "That sounds a lot like what I've heard criminals say time and time again during confessions, Syr."

"So…what're you going to do?" I asked while trying to think of a way to turn this around. The irony was, I could easily make Ryu back off and ignore everything that was going on. But doing so would prove that little voice in the back of my head right, and so much worse.

Ryu took a deep breath. "I don't know what's going on with you. So, I'm going to wait for you to ask for help. Just…if you need it…don't wait too long, okay?"

The way she said it told me that decision hadn't come via her own logic. Still, I was grateful she…

Was I grateful she was leaving things alone?

Part of me wanted her to butt in, despite the fact that if she did, it might ruin everything between us.

I gave Ryu an uneasy smile. "Thank you. And I promise, if I need your help, I'll run to you as fast as I can."

With that nerve racking conversation done, I turned to leave. Only for Ryu to reach out and take my hand again. "Syr. It's pretty late. If you want, you can stay in my room."

The offer reminded me of the harsh reality that was my life. I honestly didn't know if Syr stuck around while I was asleep. I never had the need to test it in such a way since my other duties called to me when work was completed. "I…"

My need for making up an excuse to not spend the night with my best friend and go out into the dangerous streets of Orario close to midnight was thankfully removed by a voice that belonged to the heavy steps heading up the stairs. "I'll see her home safe."

Ryu looked over to Mia before hesitantly nodding and heading to her own room.

Once she was gone, I followed the dwarf downstairs and waited while she put on her coat. Once we were outside, Mia turned to look at me with a frown. "Alright brat, what's going on?"

"You too?" I asked in retort before I began to walk down the street. There would be a carriage waiting for me around the corner one block over. I had no intention of walking through half of the city in the dead of night. "It's of no concern to a bartender who left her position."

Mia kept pace with me and snorted. "Girl, if you start causing trouble for everyone, I'll bend you over my knee and spank you."

A jolt of surprise ran up my back, and I spun around to glare at the woman. "You wouldn't dare!"

"Try me," Mia replied before she crossed her arms and frowned down at me.

I…backed down.

It was just wrong that the one person who knew the truth about me in the Hostess treated me more like a barmaid than a goddess. But…it was also something I couldn't help but admit I asked for. Be careful what you wish for, and all that.

"Now, tell me what's going on," Mia demanded.

"Wait until we have some privacy," I told her after a moment.

The silence between us only lasted until I got to the carriage that was waiting for me around the corner. Once we got in the vehicle, Mia was on me again before I even managed to get out my ticket pad that was usually just used to take down orders and pass out bills. I didn't want to be up all night sketching out instructions, so I had to talk and write at the same time.

"Now talk," Mia said.

I started working on the diagram for the runes first, since they would need to be perfect. "Usually answers are given after questions are asked," I told the woman before looking up at her. "I will say up front, some things I am not allowed to talk about at all. If I tell you I can't answer a question, it's because I literally can't. There are rules even I can't violate. Be as fussy as you want, but that's all there is to it."

Mia gave me a little snort. "Oh, now I'm the child, girl?"

"Yes," I stressed before locking eyes with the dwarf for a moment, then giving her an indignant huff. "I will be forever thankful for how you see me, Mia Grand. But do not forget what you're talking to. The breadth of my knowledge is greater than anything you could ever hope to know, even if you lived a hundred lifetimes."

The two of us stared at each other for several seconds before Mia relaxed to lean back on her seat. "Well…crap. Just what have you gotten us mixed up in?"

I sighed and started drawing on a new page after I finished the outline for the first rune. "If it makes you feel any better, if I had known at the beginning what I know now, I would have had the boy sent to Folkvangr as soon as I could guide him there. Although, I doubt Freya would have been able to deal with him as easily as I have. So, perhaps it's best that I encountered him first."

"You didn't answer my question," Mia told me.

The statement got an annoyed groan in response before I started on another rune. "Dresden is a member of a spirit faction. Their main headquarters is in the Arctic North, although they have several little enclaves around the world. There's even a few of them living in Orario, hiding in the shadows like cockroaches."

"Then, he's not a member of a familia or sworn to a god?" Mia asked.

I hesitated and stopped writing to look out the window to help clear my thoughts. "That's where things get complicated and become a matter of debate," I grumbled. "Technically, the leader of the faction is a…part of a goddess, using the body of a mortal."

Mia raised an eyebrow. "Like Horn?"

The comparison made me look away from the window and back to Mia before I shivered in revulsion. Just the idea that I could be compared to that crone in any way made me want to throw up. But, Mia was a child in the ways of the wider world, so I couldn't blame her for the insult. "No. Sorry, but it's hard to put into words that I'm allowed to use," I said while doing my best to dumb things down. "The goddess I speak of doesn't have a physical form. It's more like a disease that can be passed from person to person and infect up to three people at a time, each one representing the goddess at a certain point of development: Maiden, Mother, and Crone. One god broken into three."

I hoped Mia would let the explanation end there. I wasn't about to explain the complexities of the Summer Trinity and how they were merely different sides of the same coin. One goddess split into three that were really six, but one. Mortal races just didn't have the language needed to discuss these things.

"Why would something like that happen?" Mia asked.

After waiting for the carriage to turn down the next street, I went back to sketching runes. "A goddess cannot use her arcana in this world. But a piece of a goddess? Well, now you've got a technicality that lets you skirt the rules. And while at my full power, I could turn this city to ash in a minute, my hands are tied. But a part of a goddess that needs half an hour to do the same and can use her power openly?" I asked Mia as I met her eyes. "Which one would you rather be?"

The usual gruff stoicism Mia wrapped herself in cracked, and I noticed an uneasy look in her eyes. "So, where does the boy fit into all this?"

"Oh!" I said with a little smile after letting Mia worry for a moment. "Just because they are not bound to the same laws as me doesn't mean there are no rules for the triple goddess to follow. She's forbidden from killing mortals directly. That's where the boy comes in. It's Dresden's job to kill people for her."

Mia's expression turned into one of disbelief. "Are you telling me you let another mass murderer into my bar?"

I stared at the dwarf for a moment, and then let out a tiny laugh. "Yes, I suppose he is in good company," I admitted with a little smile before turning more serious. "Ironically, after getting a good look at him, I'd say he's the second most innocent of the people sleeping under that roof. After my little kitten, of course." I liked the other girls well enough, but Anya had been mine before she ever came to the Hostess.

And…I needed to think of something else before I let my mind rest on her for too long. My humanity might make me feel as guilty about her as I did about Ryu if I let it.

"Well, his past is a moot point. I'll be getting him out of the tavern tomorrow and see what I can do with him from there," I told Mia before the carriage came to a stop. "Which means I'll be taking the next few nights off."

A displeased sound came from Mia, and I turned around after getting out of the carriage. "Well, I don't like it, but we've got an agreement. I won't interfere with your…hunting."

My composure shattered, and I shot the woman a scowl. "This has nothing to do with my hunt for my destined beloved!" I told her fiercely. "I am going to be going on a date with Bell in two days!"

Mia gave me a tired look as she let out a sigh. "I don't think you're going about your search for a boyfriend in the right way, Syr."

"Are you seriously going to lecture me on how love works?" I demanded incredulously before pointing an accusatory finger at her. "You're practically a crazy cat lady!"

Like many of our uncultured children who knew nothing of the old history, the term went over Mia's poor head, and she just looked at me in confusion. "Um, I don't have any cats."

I snorted at her. "Anya and Chloe!"

"...those are live-in employees," Mia pointed out.

Since I didn't care to acknowledge my poor child's immature grasp of reality, I signaled to the driver. "Return her back to the tavern and then you can retire for the night," I said before shutting the carriage door. Then, I waited for the contraption to get out of my way before I crossed half the street and got to the gate of my estate.

Waiting for me were two level two mortal Einherjar were waiting at the gate like usual. If memory served, both were level three. Ragnar was the one on the left while Rollo took the position on the right. I outright ignored them and focused on the woman who was having them open the gates.

With hair a color that currently matched my own, Horn could have passed herself off as my older sister. Technically, Syr and Horn were the same age, although I tried to keep myself looking young while her day job was probably a bit more stressful than waiting tables.

"Welcome home, my lady," she said with a bow that I gave a moment to acknowledge.

"Go and wake Bringar. Tell them to meet me in my room and have coffee prepared for them. They're going to be up all night."

Both of the estate guards simply stared at me for several seconds before tears started to appear in their eyes and I looked back to my assistant as I walked through the open gateway. She seemed to have become out of sorts at my order as well.

"Um…I believe the term you would use is, phrasing, my lady," Horn told me before her cheeks heated up a little as she looked away from me.

I frowned at the odd choice of. "Phra-?" I managed to say before what Horn was thinking of hit me like a ton of bricks. "Oh for the love of-THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!"

-Dresden-

The morning after Syr taught me trying to keep secrets from her was a mostly useless effort, I was practically dragged out of bed by the giant dwarf woman to get washed up and dressed. Then, I met Syr outside her bar. "Okay, so today's moving day?" I asked as I held up a duffle bag Mia had loaned me with all my worldly possessions in one hand while my staff was in the other.

"Shush!" the goddess told me before she turned and peered down the street. After a few seconds, she brightened up as a boy came running down the mostly empty street to hold up a box carefully wrapped in a cloth when he got close. "Here you go Bell!"

Bell Cranell stopped long enough to pick up the lunch with a slightly nervous look on his face. "Thank you Syr," he said before looking at me and taking it all in. "Good morning, Mr Dresden. Um…are you moving out?"

Since when did I tell the boy anything about my living situation?

Syr or one of the others must have been talking behind my back.

"Yeah, you know what they say about guests, fish, and three days," I replied nonchalantly.

"...not…really," Bell said with a blank stare.

Syr made a little noise and held both of her hands in front of her as she fidgeted nervously. "Well, I'll see you ah…in three days, Bell." She actually managed to blush just a little bit at the last part. If I didn't know any better, I would have called her the perfect image of a bashful girl.

The reminder of their date made the boy stand up straight before I saw his entire face turn red. I'm not joking either. One of the little defects in the new breed of human looked to be a problem with the capillaries in the face. "R-Right! I, um…I'll…I'll see you then!"

As the boy quickly turned and ran away from the goddess, I looked down at her while she hid her giggling with one hand. "Still not liking that, by the way."

The giggles from the goddess stopped and she turned to frown at me. All pretense of being a young woman had disappeared. "Considering last night, you have an odd way of showing it. You should have minded your own business. Then and now."

Syr started to walk down the street and I quickly caught up to her. "Like I said, getting involved with you is better than risking his life."

"You make it sound as if I'm going to do something to stop him from going back into the dungeon," the little goddess said. "Even if something develops between the two of us, I have no intention of trying to keep him from doing what he loves."

I…hadn't realized those things weren't exclusive, or that Syr was willing to let him do something so stupid. "So, you want him getting into life threatening situations?"

"Don't think you know how I think or can judge the reality of the situation," Syr grumbled as we continued down the street. "Bell's not risking his life, not really. No more than a teenager in a car, anyway. Especially now that those other two are with him."

I gave her a steady look. "There's a difference between going to the store a mile away and going to kill something that wants to eat you with a knife."

Syr gave me another glare out of the corner of her eye as her cheeks got a little red. "You make it sound like I'm the one putting him in danger," she said before looking away.

She had a point there. It wasn't like Syr was responsible for monsters attacking the kid or anything. "Point. But…he's a kid, Syr. You could at least tell him to be careful, or something. Yeah, you're not the one putting him in danger, but…ugh, I just don't like the situation. And you're the only person I can vent to about this junk. The girls would probably just look at me like I'm crazy."

"Well…Ryu might be willing to listen," Syr told me. "Don't ask me why. That's her story to tell."

I thought about it for a second. Ryu was an elf after all. "So she's…what? Fifty? A hundred? I know elves aren't immortal." The guy at the casino had shown that. "Well, your elves, anyway. But they do live a lot longer, right?"

Syr actually stopped dead to turn and look at me before giving me a look of disbelief. "I don't know what's worse," she said with a slightly hostile tone. "Your guesses, or that you want me to tell you! Asking another girl about her best friend's age. You're shameless, Mr Dresden!"

When the goddess turned to walk away, I let her put some distance between us before I continued down the street. Half an hour later, after Syr had cooled down and I let the moral ambiguity of sending kids off to death traps work its way through my mind, we got to our destination.

It was…well…I didn't really have any expectations as to what kind of building Syr would furnish for me. So when I saw the two story building that looked like it had around one thousand square feet per floor, I was a bit surprised. "Isn't this a bit…big?" I asked.

"Really?" Syr asked as she turned around to look at me. "When I saw the remodeling blueprints yesterday, I was worried it was too cramped."

I did my best not to look at her like she was an idiot. My old office was little more than a closet. The building in front of me could have fit my office, old apartment complete with basement, and a decent garage all on the first floor.

"Yesterday?" I asked before looking back to the completed building that showed no signs of being under renovation. "They just started renovations…yesterday?"

Syr just gave me a confused look.

Which… Okay, I'll admit, I had no idea how fast people in this world could make things. For all I knew, there was something like the god of interior decorating and remodeling with a whole mess of people that could use that cheat magic that Harry Potter advertised in most of his movies to instantly do insanely complex changes to reality by waving a little stick around. There was also the possibility that the renovations were just laying down a new rug or giving a single room a new coat of paint. So, I kept my snark in reserve. "Never mind."

With that conversation averted, Syr shrugged before opening the double doors and walking into my office. Well, the reception area of my office. That came fully furnished, by the way. The room was a massive thirty feet across by maybe sixteen feet from the door to the desk in the back of the room that was built into the wall, with two rows of chairs that had seating facing both the desk and door. It looked more like the waiting area of a doctor's office that expected people to sit on their butts for over an hour than a PI office.

Two doors were on the right side of the room, with another on the left, and a third next to the desk on the far side of the room from us.

"I suppose this will do for a reception area," Syr mumbled as she looked around. "We'll need some paintings, a few plants, maybe a bookshelf or two for decor."

It took me a moment to process just what the little goddess was saying. "...excuse me?" I asked.

Syr looked up at me. "Well, this will be my work area. It's only right that I get to decide how it's decorated."

My mind continued to try and process what part of me was already fearing. "What do you mean your work area?"

"Oh! Didn't I tell you?" she asked sweetly with a deceptive air of innocence. "I'll be working with you. Every detective needs a smarter, prettier and all around better counterpart to point him towards the correct answer."

Before I could even get indignant at Syr, someone else butted into the conversation. "Hey!" A slightly squeaky, female voice spoke up from inside my bag before a small creature that looked like most of the important women in my life all rolled into one with black hair phased through my carryon and flew up in front of Syr's face. "I'm the plucky young sidekick here!"

The one difference that Bonnie had undergone since the night Syr caught onto her was the wings she used. Gone were the flaming feathers that were an obvious homage to her angelic heritage. In their place were wings that looked like they belonged on a dragonfly and moved so fast I couldn't see them unless I tried.

The goddess didn't look the bit disturbed at the floating woman that was slightly smaller than Syr's head. "Actually, I'd say you're more along the lines of a commentating lore master. That's what Dresden called you to do after all," she said as her voice became dry with resentment before she locked eyes on me. "He apparently doesn't trust me enough to rely on the information I can give him."

"You did just drop this whole assistant thing on me," I pointed out.

Syr frowned back at me. "You're still walking around blind and surrounded by bear traps. Do you honestly think I'm going to leave you alone long enough to step on one?" she demanded.

Then, the little goddess broke eye contact and started to look a little embarrassed. Or maybe…guilty. "Besides…waitressing can get a little stale, sometimes. Maybe I wanted to break it up a little."

I narrowed my eyes as I replayed the night at the casino for what had to be the thirtieth time in my head. Syr had seemed excited about her little plan that she halfway treated as a joke and put off when she hadn't been able to play poker. "Wait…are you here because I'm supposed to entertain you?"

Bonnie moved around and despite floating in the air, she made like she was sitting on a chair as she crossed her legs in front of her and rubbed her chin. "Hmmm…that is the main reason most deities left Heaven."

Syr actually had the gall to roll her eyes at my indignation. "Oh yes, it's such a bad thing that I'm putting you in a situation to solve everyone's problems and go on a bunch of zany adventures for my own amusement!" she snorted. "You sound like one of those people complaining about how merchants used to buy beds and medical treatments for orphans just because it gave them a tax break."

I kept glaring at her for a few more seconds just out of spite. I had known there was going to be some hidden twist or fine print in the deal with Syr. I just hadn't expected it to be so…strange. "And if I say no?"

"I will remove all of my funding and leave you destitute," Syr told me before tapping her chin and looking up at the ceiling. "But, that won't actually keep you out of the clutches of other gods. So, I'll have to send some goons to grab you. Then I'll keep you in my secret sex dungeon until you agree to keep me on as your assistant."

"Um…you're joking, right?" I asked nervously. The way she just casually said it made me a little cautious that what Syr was saying was true.

Bonnie buzzed up next to my head. "Maybe. It's hard to tell with her. Most people are easy to read, but I can't even tell if she's really a goddess or not. Which goes with the abilities of an elder god like Odin, Zeus, Hera, Freya, Kali, or Quatzecotal. They can completely disguise themselves to walk among mortals to the point even other gods don't register their presence."

Which…made me go back to being a little afraid of Syr. Despite never offering proof, I hadn't really distrusted her 'I'm a god' claims because…well, I had just been too tired the first night we met, and after coming across Hercules and Hestia the next day, gods just walking around the city were a very real thing. Then there were all the lies she told to the face of several gods without any problems, despite them being natural lie detectors. Which meant that she was a bigger god than most of the others. Bonnie had just confirmed her elder status.

Unless, she was some kind of eldritch abomination.

But I didn't want to think about that, so I quickly took the least bad option amongst all the choices to talk about.

"So…what, you're saying she's Freya?" I asked while pointing at the barely bigger than five foot waitress.

Syr's face turned into a frown. "Hey."

"Naw," Bonnie replied with a shake of her head. "If she was Freya, you'd be down on all fours, begging to lick her feet to show your devotion."

"HEY!" Syr yelled, grabbing our attention. Then, she just glared at Bonnie, or maybe me, it was hard to tell since the spirit was floating right next to me. "I'm standing right here. So stop talking about me like I'm not!"

I cleared my throat and looked away. "Um…sorry," I apologized before looking back to Bonnie and switching topics. Syr couldn't be mad about talking about another god behind their back, right? "So uh, what was that about Freya?"

"She's a love goddess," Bonnie told me, as if it explained everything. When it became obvious it didn't, the little spirit rolled her eyes. "They have all this aura that practically makes people devoted to them even if they don't focus it to outright charm someone into being their willing slave."

That sounded a lot like a certain type of half-monster I used to know. "You mean, like a white court vampire?"

While Syr looked ready to gag at the comparison, Bonnie became thoughtful. "Not really. White court vampires are more about sex and physical attraction. With them, it's all bestial and hormonal. Love goddesses trigger something deeper. Don't get me wrong, you'll still get a boner after looking at one for more than five seconds, but physical gratification won't be the driving factor for you wanting to obey," she explained. "It's a slight difference, that still makes you want to be with them, but the route they take changes a lot of the side effects. Like with their mind control and the kind of magic Molly used on her friends. Molly forced those kids to obey her will to stop taking heroin. She twisted their minds in a way that made them fight her every second of the day, which ended up causing major damage from the strain of resisting it. But if Freya came through that door, looked you in the eyes and told you to do something, you'd want to do it. There wouldn't be any resistance or long term mental damage because she's altering a fundamental driving force in your mind."

"Can we talk about something else, please?" Syr grumbled as she looked away from the two of us with her arms crossed.

I cleared my throat. "Right. Okay…" I said before taking a deep breath. I thought about mentioning how Syr's sex dungeon comment was what led us down this road, but… "Plucky young assistant. Yeah, okay…I think that'll work."

It wasn't as if she was too young to be facing any dangers, or too immature to make her own decisions. Plus, I didn't know anywhere near enough about Orario to be walking down the shadier streets or making good judgment calls. And nothing I did would stop her from just tagging along anyway if she wanted to anyway. Best to use a resource then let it turn into a hindrance though my own decisions.

"Good," Syr replied with a curt nod. "Now, let's continue the tour. Exploration…whatever."

Our little three way conversation seemed to have drained Syr of her enthusiasm for exploration, and she was mostly silent as we went from room to room, starting with the rest of the downstairs. The room on the left led to a bathroom, while the two doors on the right were more or less large storage closets. When I got done looking at both of them, I turned my attention to Syr. "Which one is supposed to be my office?"

"I'm guessing it's the room with the window," she said while nodding to the door furthest inside the building.

I frowned at her. "You said you approved all of this, right?"

When Syr nodded, I threw my hand out to gesture towards the waiting area. "Then why is your work area ten times bigger than mine?"

"Seven-point-two," Bonnie corrected.

For her part, Syr rolled her eyes. "Oh come now, all the best detectives have cramped little offices they can barely fit a desk and filing cabinet in! Matlock, Marlowe, Columbo, An-well, not Angel, but there was plenty wrong with that series."

"This isn't a television show!" I told her.

To which Syr slumped in response before she sighed in disappointment. "Unfortunately."

After taking a second longer to frown at her, I looked back at the room with the window before I went back to the other storage closet, and then again back to the first one. Both of which were empty. "Okay, tell me this then oh wise goddess of television," I began as my annoyance continued to rise. "If one of these is supposed to be my office, where's my desk? Or chairs? Or anything for that matter?"

Syr blinked in response before looking into closet one, then walking down to look into closet two before coming back with a frown on her face. "Okay, so we are missing a few things after all."

"Hmmm, guess the society without television doesn't know what goes into a private detective's office," Bonnie pointed out.

With both of us having enthusiasm cut in half, I opened the back door to find a stairwell that had stairs going up and down. Since I wanted to hurry up and get things over with, I went upstairs without comment and kept the chatter to a minimum. The upstairs was as large as the downstairs, but was actually fully furnished. The living room had several empty bookshelves lining two of the walls, along with a large rug that covered most of the stone floor. There was a couch with a coffee table in the middle of the room, another reading chair by a set of windows, and another chair by the large fireplace. On the other side of the fireplace, I found the kitchen area with all the fire based cooking implants making use of the chimney as well in a setup that I can only assume came from a deity designing something that made use of modern engineering techniques to compensate for a lack of electricity. Another room held a magically modern bathroom that managed to have reliable running hot water that I'll admit, I came to depend on for some time now.

However, everything was far from perfect. When I got to my bedroom, there was something to be desired…

"Why is my bed so small?" I asked Syr as I looked at the little thing that a sixth grader would have had trouble sleeping in.

Syr was also wearing a sour face. "I'm guessing it's for pallums," she grumbled in displeasure.

I looked down at the goddess. "You mean those hobbits I've seen running around?" Not many of them went down into the dungeon. Which meant the number I had seen come to an adventurer's bar like the Hostess of Fertility could be counted on one hand.

"Uh…" Bonnie spoke up. "I think it's a bit rude to call hobbits, well…hobbits. Especially if you're taller. At least, that's what I heard when I was in Heaven."

Syr let out a tiny groan. "No, that's not it," she moaned. "The Summer Court filed a lawsuit about eight hundred years ago for our use of the term and demanded we can't call them that."

The sheer absurdity of Syr's words had me cocking my head. "I'm sorry…what?"

"So, the story is, the Summer Court bought the rights to the Lord of the Rings from the Tolkeen estate in perpetuity shortly before Armageddon. When we were designing all the new mortal races, we obviously went with Nordic lore with some pop culture thrown in. A lot of deities argued that if we had elves and dwarves, we just had to have hobbits. Then, there were arguments about the feet because a lot of people didn't like all the hair. So we just made them short with good eyesight. But, the hobbit name was recognizable, so we kept it despite the racial differences. Unfortunately, after the gods descended and treaties were signed with the spirits, they noticed we were using a trademarked name for one of our races and took issue with it. So we had to hold arbitration and eventually conceded the point."

I continued to stare at Syr for several seconds. The more I learned about the universe, the more disturbing things became.

And then, I got the oh so bright idea to ask the obvious. "Um, what about just calling them halflings?"

"Mab owns Hasbro," Syr told me. "Which includes Dungeons & Dragons. We didn't want to get into another legal battle, so…pallum."

"But that…how do you just change the name of an entire race?" I asked.

Syr looked over to me and raised an eyebrow. "Didn't Americans used to call all black skinned humans-"

"Okay! Let's go check out the basement!" I told her before turning and walking the hell away from that conversion.

After withdrawing from the foolish conversation to preserve Syr's pride before I could completely turn things around with my superior intellect, I went downstairs to a basement that could have doubled as a basketball court, if not for all of the stuff strewn around the floor. Like the living space, there were several bookshelves. Unlike the top floor, these were actually stocked with materials and numerous jars that had labels that took me a little work to read thanks to everything being written in almost-English. There were pieces of mundane animals like dog hair and cat bones, to things I had to wonder about, like mermaid blood and rabbit…horns?

There were also several tables set up around various points of the room that had several beakers, vials, jars and other accouterments that would have had people accusing me of running a meth lab back in the day. All of which were lit by a collection of lamps with magical stones floating in the center, giving everything a pinkish glow.

When I finished looking at everything, I went back to the table in the center of it all to put my mostly empty duffle bag down next to two other medium boxes that were already there and took out Bonnie's temporary container to set it up while she buzzed around the room. Then, I looked back at Syr. "Okay, I'm willing to believe an impossibly old little girl with billions of dollars squared away for a rainy day can buy whatever she wants," I said. "But there's no way you did all this in a day."

"Three days," Syr corrected me. "And one night, if you really want to be specific about the time. I had no intention of you ever living at the tavern. And haven't you ever heard not to look a gift horse in the mouth?"

I frowned at her and crossed my arms. "Not when it doesn't come from humans. If you get a gift from a fairy, you check it every which way possible to make sure it's not going to give you the plague. So, my point stands."

Wherever retort Syr was going to give me when Bonnie flew up between us. "Uh, it's pretty obvious she's got a god under her thumb, duh," my not-daughter said before looking around. "Probably more than one. Or somebody really powerful."

"...that makes no sense," I told the illusion of a fairy fluttering around before I looked over at Syr. She was a waitress for crying out loud. She may have been a goddess herself, but it was obvious she was in hiding. If she had those kinds of connections, she wouldn't have been slumming it in a bar.

Although… "I like being a waitress!" Syr reminded me in the back of my mind.

Syr groaned before she walked around the table we were at and pushed a medium-sized box over to me. "Here," she grumbled. "Just add it to the list of impossible things I can pull out of my butt. The other one has your adventuring gear. Wear it when you're in the dungeon."

I opened the wooden box and reached inside to pull out… "A bracelet?" I asked while I turned the piece of gaudy jewelry over in my hand. It was a thin piece of twined metal that was much too large for my wrist, covered in small markings I couldn't quite make out. At the top of the bracelet was a green gem.

"It's an armband," Syr told me with a bit of annoyance. I could almost hear the 'uncultured lout' at the end.

Bonnie let out an interested noise before she flew down and did a few aerial acrobatics around it in a way that reminded me her wings were just for show. "Ohhhh! An adamantite base with an emerald gem as the core. Are those runes an enchantment guide for a spirit vessel with durability enhancements, unlimited storage with subjective interior perception, light and sound projection, and a chameleon function?"

My daughter zipped over to the goddess. "If you're trying to bribe me, Lady Syr…you're doing a very good job!"

"Hey!" I shot at Bonnie. "I made you-"

"A shoebox," Bonnie replied in a dangerous tone before I could finish. "I couldn't even talk to anyone outside that thing! Now, put it on. It'll take an hour for your magic to fully enchant it and I am not going back into that little pen you made for me when there's this thing! Not to mention, it'll save me months of waiting for a decent house."

I looked back down at the jewelry with trepidation. Something that I was supposed to wear that I didn't make, designed to take my magical aura and twist it around to do something I couldn't even follow after examining the thing was not something I would have done under any circumstances. Not without a lot of vetting, at least. "Are you sure this thing is safe?"

Bonnie actually got up in my face. "Oh for crying-they're basic nordic runes! It's the most upfront magical language there is!"

On the other side of the table, Syr let out a tiny sniffle and gave me an overly hurt expression. "Oh, you still don't trust me, Mr Dresden? Even after-"

"Okay! Okay!" I grumbled before giving the BRACELET another once over. Then, I took off my duster to slowly slip the bracelet onto my arm and bring it up until it was halfway between my shoulder and elbow. There was a slight itch, but I didn't feel the sudden need to pledge my loyalty to the little goddess, or a sudden loss of my Power.

After putting my duster back on, I looked back into the box and frowned. The bracelet had taken all of my attention, but I hadn't missed the very thick stack of papers underneath it. After pulling it out to get it in the light, I frowned as I read the thing aloud.

"Harry Dresden. Level four S-Class mage. Professional enchanter and magical item crafter," I mumbled before looking at my listed address and the showy design on the paper that several depictions of things I could only half-identify from the picture. There was more writing at the bottom. "Also offering divination services to find objects, lost people, and magic consultation services."

When I finished reading the advertisement, I looked up at her and frowned. "My tracking spell is Thaumaturgy-based."

Syr rolled her eyes. "Which is a word that will make most people look at you like you're too drunk to speak correctly. Now, I need to get back to work, and ah…talk to the moving company about your bed," she said with a grumble in the middle. "You need to take a stack of those and post them up at the Guild. Come to Mamma Mia's when you're done."

Before I could protest, Bonnie cleared her throat. "He can do all that after my new penthouse is ready," she said before flying into the box that held my 'adventuring gear' as Syr had called it. "Oh! Is that salamander wool and nemean lion skin?"

-Syr-

By the time I got back to the tavern, everything was open for lunch and customers had just started to trickle in. I said hello to my girls, then got changed and ready to face another day of dishing out food to the good people of Orario while also happy about not having to deal with the more seedy side of the population for a while.

At least, that was what I was hoping for, until the seediest of all seedy characters walked into my bar.

Perhaps I was a bit biased, considering the bitch queen of his patheon was the reason I was stuck in Orario while the king of his godly group was a criminally degenerate man who could be flayed alive for one million years and not yet pay for a tenth of his crimes against the entire female sex, but Hermes couldn't be trusted. The fact that he was in Orario at all right now was proof of that.

The god was one of the few beings residing in the city that was allowed to come and go as he pleased without having to do a mountain of paperwork thanks to his familia being a bunch of glorified postal workers. On paper, at least. My sources said they were a few levels higher than the Guild was reporting they were and did the Guild's dirty work more than most of the other familia.

He was also supposed to be gone for at least another month. The fact that he was back meant something big had happened while he had been out running around. Just what that was, I needed to find out.

The blonde god adjusted his brown hat as the feather stuck in it brushed against the top of the doorway before also messing with his red scarf before Chloe came up to make her customary introduction. "Welcome fur-ends!" the black haired catgirl said happily before noticing whom she was talking to. "Oh, Lord Hermes! What brings mew in here today?"

"Oh, just wanting to catch up," he said in a happy tone. "And hear the juiciest gossip, of course. Like, what is this I hear about someone leveling up in just two months?"

My little black kitten gave the god a giggle. "Oh, if you want to know about Bell Cranel, Syr's the one mew should talk to. They're an item!"

I gave my best little laugh as I came up to the god at the same time as the captain of his familia walked through the door. "Lord Hermes, Ms Asfi," I greeted them with a smile. "You know Mamma doesn't like it when adventurers come early."

"Syr!" Hermes greeted me a little too enthusiastically. "Such a beautiful ray of sunshine. What's this I hear about another man stealing you away from me?"

Behind the god, I saw the woman with blue hair and small rectangular glasses shoot her god a glare. I didn't know the full story behind Asfi Al Andromeda, but what I did know was enough. She had been the princess of a large island before Hermes had come and taken her away as a child. What exactly he offered the girl to make her tag along with him was a mystery, but there was a begrudging devotion towards her god in her that left me feeling jealous whenever I looked at the child.

For my part, I just gave Hermes another laugh. "Oh, I could never be an adventurer," I assured the deity sweetly. "And Mr Bell is just a friend. We haven't even been on a date."

"Yet!" Chloe added before leaning towards me. "And if mew want some tips, Syr. I know the purrfect way to handle little boys."

The offer made me take a step back and give my kitten a little nervous laugh. As much as I loved Chloe, her taste in men was…illegal. "T-That's okay Chloe, I can manage."

Hermes, of all people, came to my rescue and in a reversal of the norm, started leading me to a nearby table before he sat down as his main mortal did her best to intercept Mamma Mia. When we were alone, the god smiled at me. "So, tell me about this paragon of masculinity that finally managed to bag the poster girl of this fine establishment."

"Paragon of-" I couldn't even finish the question before letting out a tiny snicker. Bell was many things, but masculine was definitely not one of them. He was more like…a cute little bunny.

Although, it did make me wonder what he was up to in the dungeon. With it almost being lunchtime, he should have been around the twelfth floor.

-Bell-

Dungeon delving always comes with a risk, be it the first floor, or the deepest of pits. I learned that during my second week as an adventurer, when a minotaur managed to make its way up ten floors to find and try to kill me. It was also when I met the most amazing, beautiful and courageous woman I ever saw in my life. But…that doesn't have much to do with the point I'm trying to make, so I'll skip talking about her and just tell you the lesson my encounter before her taught me. There's unexpected danger everywhere in the dungeon, and trying to plan for them would probably leave me cowering in a corner as I thought of everything that could possibly kill me.

But, for the moment, everything was going as expected. Ms Ryu had warned us about how the monsters tended to spawn faster, so my party kept things close and tight with me acting as a wide range vanguard, darting around to deal with the faster monsters while Welf took care of the ones that got close to him and Lilly. Our smallest member even fired off her crossbow a few times, taking care of things I couldn't get to in time or slowing down a monster so Welf could hit it with his greatsword.

After dealing with the last hellhound of our first big monster group, Lilly went darting around the numerous stalagmites to pick up the dropped crystals while the rest of us kept watch. I had tried helping her a few times previously, but she always lectured me about staying on guard and making sure I stayed alert in case a monster spawned. I could stop something if it spawned suddenly while she was bent over, but we would be in big trouble if a monster caught me off guard while I was digging around for stones.

"Okay, that makes-" Lilly managed to say before a new sound cut her off.

I spun around at the unknown noise that didn't sound anything like rock moving or some other natural sound before getting my knives ready. The dark corners of the dungeon that even the blessing on my eyes couldn't illuminate were filled by several red glowing orbs that slowly started moving towards us. And when they imaged from the dark, I found myself staring down a trio of…

"Are those rabbits?" Welf asked as the three bipedal bunnies whose eyes I had seen earlier came into the light.

Lilly studied the three of them for a moment, then turned her attention to me. "You know…they kind of look like you."

I dropped my jaw in Lilly's general direction. Why did everyone, even the kids in my old village say I looked like a rabbit? "Oh come on! I look nothing like those things!"

"Guys, I thought these floors were supposed to be dangerous with big scary monsters. What're Bell's younger brothers doing here?" Welf asked.

With Welf joining in on the mockery, I let out an annoyed groan. It wasn't funny or original. "First off, I'm three times the size of one of those things," I told them while pointing at the monsters that suddenly pulled out little handaxes. "And I'm using daggers!"

Welf just cocked his head to the side as he just got even more confused. "Wha-Where the hell do these things get that stuff anyway?"

More sounds from deeper down the cave resounded, and three more sets of eyes came into view before three more evil rabbits with weapons came into the light.

"Probably from the same place as those guys," Lilly commented before there were even more animal sounds, followed by three more almiraj rabbits coming out of the darkness that pulled out weapons. "And…those guys."

"You know…maybe we should have asked the mage to tag along after all," Welf said nervously as the odds put us up against more than three to one. Although the almiraj rabbit was the weakest monster on the section of floors we had made it to, they were considered to be level two difficulty because of how they hunted in packs. Large packs, with each one being the equal to a level one adventurer. "We could really use some AoE right now."

The mention of an Area of Effect spell brightened my outlook on life from the impending death that was still adding to its numbers. "Hey, I have AoE!" I said maybe a bit too happily. "...even if I'm still not sure how to activate it."

Argonaut, my newest skill had let me kill a baby dragon in one shot not one floor up. The goddess had said it was like a 'hero shot' when it appeared on my falna yesterday. Whatever that meant. I wished the gods weren't so cryptic in their messaging, or used words I actually understood when they explained things.

"Okay," Lilly said nervously. "Let's fall back into the tunnel we came from. That'll bottleneck the bunnies and help us buy time for Bell to charge his skill so we can hopefully…not…die."

The crazy axe murdering bunnies charged at us, and we began to valiantly fall back in a way I really hoped didn't make it into any legends I might one day inspire. I managed to kill the first two pretty easily, and Welf got one as well, but things started to take a bad turn when six of them came at us and I was still having…problems.

"Charge up!" I shouted while shaking my offhand weapon and only fighting with the knife the goddess gave me. "Activate power! Uh…suuuuper somethingorother!"

Welf barely avoided getting an axe in the eye before he batted away one of the bunnies. "What the hell are you doing?!"

"I DON'T KNOW!" I cried out in desperation while trying to shake my arm in different directions to see if that was what activated Argonaut. I tried raising my hand up, and then higher before moving it lower and practically towards the ground, then I frantically waved my offhand weapon from side to side twice in rapid succession before giving up on that idea. Why in the world was it that the gods saw fit to put the instruction manual for the powers on our backs?!

"It's okay," Lilly cried out. "We can just kite the monsters into the open area ahead and lead them around while knocking down their numbers-"

Before she could finish, a new, much more masculine voice cut in, coming from the area we had been hoping to escape to. "RUN! KEEP GOING!"

Time seemed to slow down, and the three of us could only watch as a group of five adventurers with clothing and gear that marked their origins as being from the Far East ran by the tunnel exit in front of us. I saw one of them, a girl with blood running down her back, was being carried by the largest in the group and he turned his head to look at us. Our eyes met for that brief second, and then…they ran by us with a group of mixed monsters easily ten times larger than the pack we were having trouble with began to pass by the exit to our tunnel.

At least, they did until a few of the monsters noticed us. Then they started to stop and turn towards the three of us.

Lilly made a disagreeable noise and I wondered if something had gone down the wrong way before she said what we were all thinking. "Those bastards…THEY PASSED PARADED US!"

I stopped trying to activate my skill as Lilly's words went through my head. A pass parade, the term for a large group of monsters that tend to come together when a particularly fast adventurer either gets in over his head and needs to run away, or tries to skip past a bunch of low level monsters using sheer speed. Whatever the reason, they were very frowned upon because the more someone ran, the more monsters were added to the group, until it was far too large to be handled by a normal party. And, like with us, the parade tended to jump onto other targets when the adventurer that was running away put too much distance between himself and his pursuers.

With our exit cut off by an even larger and more dangerous group of monsters than we had been retreating from, Lilly got between me and Welf for protection while I took up a position to try and deal with our new arrivals, and Welf moved to hold off the bunnies, even though his weapon was the slowest.

"Oh man…we're dead," the smith lamented.

I wanted to tell him differently, that the heroes in all the old stories I read always found a way to survive and win the day. But…I couldn't. We had been about to start heading home after the last fight because this was just supposed to be a scouting mission to the Middle Floors to see if we could handle a few monsters. It wasn't a real expedition. We didn't have the supplies to recover from another big fight.

Despair started to creep its way into my thoughts and even though it was my imagination, I could almost hear my funeral bell starting to toll.