Book II: Age of the Phoenix

Chapter XIX: The Walls Have Ears

Music Theme: Telephone Line - Electric Light Orchestra

Hogwarts - June 1943...

"Steady," a young boy in Hufflepuff robes said as he held a net in one hand and his wand in the other and precariously perched on a rock atop the swampy banks of the Black Lake. "Steady..."

"Amos," called a Gryffindor, the same age, yet significantly more tired as he sat and watched from his seat on a dead and fallen tree trunk.

"Steady.."

"Amos, come on you've been saying 'steady' for ten minutes. It's a miracle the toad hasn't hopped away already. Just catch the damn thing before it dies of boredom."

The third-year Hufflepuff lunged forward and flopped into the mud, barely missing the toad with his net and it croaking as it hopped away. "No!" He sat up and stared daggers at his friend, "I'm going to bloody kill you, Lyall Lupin!"

"What did I do?" Young Lyall asked in frustration.

"You rushed me!"

"Need I remind you, Longbottom, that it's after curfew. If you aren't careful, Dumbledore's going to find us. I don't know how he manages to always find us when we're up to something."

"Probably why they made him head of Gryffindor house, I'd recon. But it's not Gryffindor's house head I'm trying to impress. It's Slytherin's."

"A toad's going to impress Slughorn?" Lyall raised a single eyebrow.

"Toad sweat is an essential ingredient in the most complex potions. If I can impress him then maybe I can get into Slugclub. Figured I'd just give the toad to that Rubeus kid afterwards. He like's animals, right?"

"An understatement," Lyall chuckled but his grin faded quickly.

"What you pondering over there?" Amos asked as he climbed from the mud and cleaned himself off.

"I just can't comprehend why you'd wish to be in Slugclub, that's all. Some of those blokes are strange."

"Lestrange and Mulciber are definitely bad news, but Dad said Delaney is a good chum and then there's Bones - he's from Hufflepuff like me. Crouch isn't so bad once you understand what the book-worm is saying with his fancy words."

"What about Riddle?"

"Why'd you have to go and bring him up," Amos asked, instantly disgruntled.

"So you feel it too?"

"Aye. He's creepy.

"I caught him staring at the walls the other day, listening to them."

"Was he eves dropping on portraits?"

"No, there were no portraits in sight. He just stood there whispering to the bloody wall."

"Freak," Amos grunted.

"Your buddy Orion certainly likes him."

"Orion isn't my friend," Amos sighed. "I know Dad wants me to give the Black's a chance because Old Regulus is a kind one, but the rest of the Blacks can take care of themselves." The toad croaked nearby and Amos resumed the position of stealth and lifted his net, "Steady..."

"What do you think's behind the walls?"

"Who says something's behind it?" Amos replied but kept his focus on the amphibian.

"Well why else would he talk to them? Riddle, I mean." Lyall pondered a moment. "You know, my books on magical creatures were talking of undocumented beasts. They're so rare that they're almost fiction. The thing is, they aren't really rare... just really good at hiding."

"You think Hogwarts has a beast living in the walls?"

"Maybe."

"And you think Riddle knows how to talk to it?"

"Well, it's not out of the question. After all, Rubeus can talk to spiders like nobody else I've seen. In fact, just the other day-"

"Lyall," Amos Longbottom sighed when the toad vanished once more. "Can I give you a bit of advice I always give my nosey kid brother when he starts asking questions he's no mind ask."

"If you must..."

"There's a great many secrets and dark corners of this world. Tom Riddle, in my opinion, dwells in the darkest corner of all. It's why he only keeps company with the troublesome students."

"What's your advice then?" Lyall asked impatiently.

"Don't look in dark corners, until you're ready to live with the knowledge of what's hiding there."

"Who says I'm not?"

Amos just rolled his eyes, "Bloody Gryffindors. Always wanting to dive in head first. Well one of these days, mate, you're going to bite off more than you can chew. Take some advice from the Hufflepuff way of life. Keep your mouth shut, and your eyes open. The reverse will just get you into trouble."

"What kind of trouble is there to get into at school?" Lyall scoffed.

Even as he said it though, a blood-curddling scream was heard from the castle. Amos dropped his net and every creature around the lake went silent as if they knew the cause of the cry. After a long moment, Amos said, "What the hell was that?"

"I think someone just got caught in one of Hogwarts dark corners..."

The Safe House - February 10, 1980...

Lily felt the sun hit her face the morning after the full moon. She smelled coffee brewing and heard the tea kettle whistle. As she sat up, the memory of the last 48 hours plagued her. Sirius had returned from his flat and shared with James the decision he'd made regarding Tabitha. It didn't go well.

Lily yelled at him, scolding him like a mother... You had no right, Sirius! You had no right to do this to them!

James lecturing him like a father... You always charge ahead without thinking, Padfoot! This is going to crush Moony. He's going to run away again.

Meanwhile, Remus had gone and listened to the somber news from Dumbledore regarding his mother. It was true. Greyback had been assigned the task of eliminating Lyall Lupin, most likely. He arrived to the Lupin home, and found Hope Lupin alone instead.

Overwhelmed by the loss, all Remus craved was Tabitha's protective embrace one more time before sunset, only to find Sirius' flat in Crouch Hill empty. The day that followed was one of the darkest moments in his life as he discovered what Sirius had done.

Lily recalled the painful memory of Remus returning to the Safehouse and immediately finding Sirius to confront him...

"You always felt threatened by her, Padfoot! Don't deny it"

"She was going to die if she stayed, Moony! Do you really think you two would get married and live happily ever after?"

"I don't know what we would have decided to do, but we would have decided it together! You don't get to be part of my life decisions anymore, Padfoot."

"Says the bloke who made me promise to kill him if the bloody potion doesn't work tomorrow and you want to play chew toy with my best mate's body again!"

"That's different! I asked you a favor in order to protect everyone else."

"Sending her away WAS me protecting everyone else."

"I should have known I couldn't trust you when you tried to serve me Snape for dinner."

"I was a kid!"

"Which makes this offense so much worse, Sirius! You know better."

"Yes! I know better! I know what's better for you more than you do! You two would have loved each other to your graves so I had to do what was needed. You think she would stand a chance against a werewolf? Your mother couldn't, so how could Tabitha?

- There was a slam of furniture and the entire house shook, leaving Lily to assume Remus had pinned Sirius firmly to the wall.

"Get Her Name Out Of Your Inbred Mouth!"

Lily flinched as she recalled the loud blow of a punch being thrown before James ran into Sirius' room to break up the fight. He never did see who it was that threw the punch, nor did it matter. The words spoken by both were deserving enough of a good blow to the nose, but regardless of who struck who... the damage was done on both sides.

The rest of the day, Sirius and Remus remaind in nutral corners and much to Remus' protest, Sirius still accomponied the lads to the Shreiking Shack when the moon came as he had since they were boys.

Now, after a restless full moon night, the door opened and Lily waited patiently, exhaling a breath of relief as her husband entered. "James..."

"Hey Potter," he grinned at the sight of her and took her in his arms when she reached him. "No fur coat for me. I was my normal self all night. Scar from the bite did itch a bit, but that's all. What they say about being an animagus is true. They don't succom to the werewolf curse when bitten."

"And Remus? Did the potion work?"

James pulled back and looked at her uncertain, "I think it did."

"You think?"

"Well, his transformation was normal but he didn't seem as violent. Nothing like last month. There was one moment that he just stared his wolfy eyes at Padfoot like he wanted to lung at him but he just huffed some hot breaths before backing off and sitting curled up in the corner the rest of the night. Didn't look at any of us after that."

"It worked, Lily." Remus' emotionless voice came form the door and Lily peered over James shoulder to him.

"Rem," He was standing there with Peter's help to keep him upright, but was significantly stronger than normal post-moon and able to stand somewhat on his own. Lily hurried to wrap him into a hug. She'd hardly had a minute to embrace and comfort him following the news of his mother and Tabitha's departure. "I'm so happy to hear that. You were in control all night?"

"All night," he whispered. "I could see everything, feel everything... remember everything."

"Oh, Remus, I'm so so sorry..."

"I'd like to go to bed before Sirius gets back, if that's ok." He sad bluntly.

"Um, sure." Lily stepped aside and Peter assisted his friend up the crooked steps to his room.

"James," Lily sounded defeated and shook her head as James wrapped his arm around her waist. "This is bad."

"I know. It's like when they were fighting in school, only this time I feel mending things won't be as easy."

"How's Sirius?"

"He went for at walk after the sun came up. I told him to stay near the Black Lake so he would be protected by Hogwarts in case of an emergency."

"I asked how he is, not where..."

James looked her in the eye and his voice cracked slightly as he said, "I'm afraid I'm losing my best mates, Lily... and I've no idea how to stop it."

Upstairs, Peter had an armful of albums in his arms and rifled through each one saying, "I've got all your favorite things, Remus. Chocolate in the nightstand. Some morning-after potion Lily's made to help with your strength. I also pulled together some albums for you yesterday when you were... well, when you didn't feel like coming out of your room. I got some bright-sounding ones that may help lift your spirits. The Monkees, Edison Lighthouse, Jackson 5- Oh," Peter stared at the latter, "Sorry. I didn't realized her records got mixed up with mine."

"It's ok, Wormtail. You can leave it." Remus sat on the edge of the bed, his eyes drooping in exhaustion and his tone weighed down with sorrow.

Peter tucked the albums behind the lamp on the nightstand. "I guess you won't want music anyway if you want to sleep."

Remus didn't say much. He just stared forward without a glimmer of emotion on his face before saying, "I wish she knew... that the potion worked. She worked so hard on finding it for me."

"I know you miss her, Remus, but maybe Sirius is right. Maybe it's for the best. What happened with your Mum was awful, but-"

"But?" Remus looked to the small young man sternly. "Choose your next words damn carefully, Wormtail."

"B-but... maybe Tabitha is safer away from us. Maybe we are safer too. If she is the Guardian-"

"She isn't," He cut him off sternly.

Peter just shuffled his feet as the awkward silence lingered. Finally he said, "Y-you know, Moony... You'll always have me. Maybe we can stick together. I got lots of money from my Step-father's estate after school. I can get us a nice house after the war has blown over. You know I keep to myself and with your... condition... it's not like you'll be dating someone else soon. We'll do life together."

"Someone else?" Remus just whispered, feeling sick at the suggestion that Tabitha wasn't coming back.

"I just mean that you and me will be together, no matter what. You can count on me, Moony."

"That's fine, Wormtail." He just muttered. "That's fine."

The Ministry of Magic...

The Ministry was abuzz as the former Minister had been removed from office and a new one appointed. The fight against Voldemort was top priority as the new Minister tightened security. All departments now required wand identification before entering restricted areas, no unauthorized meetings were allowed across departments and department heads were required to conduct background checks on anyone hired through suspected nepotism. Of course, Bartemous Crouch Sr. refused to acknowledge the latter of those changes, keeping his son on as his apprentice despite his concerns about the boy's peculiarities.

"Sir," Mary MacDonald spoke up as she watched her enchanted quill take down the Baremous Crouchs' dictations. "Are you sure about this? Having Aurors use unforgivable curses to capture or kill death eaters?" The quill scratched to a halt and almost appeared to be looking between the two individuals before continuing.

"Their ranks are growing stronger, Mary. It's kill or be killed out there."

"But isn't it said that using the killing curse splits a person's soul apart?'

"I'm concerned for their lives, Mary. Not their souls. We'll get the Aurors some ministry-paid therapy after the war is won." Although the man spoke of extreme procedures, his tone had a tremor of anxiety. It was clear that the recent removal of the Minister made him fear for his own job security if he could not take larger strides towards ending Voldemort's crusade.

"Yes, sir..." Mary looked back to her note pad and said, "Anything else?"

"Only that if anyone asks if we support the removal of our Minister, the answer must be a resounding 'yes'! He was weak. Unpopular with the people. We have to lead with strength."

"Perhaps you could try to lift Frank Longbottom's suspension. He was popular with the Aurors and that may soften the blow of these, um, changes?"

"Longbottom's wife is my relative, Mary. It will look like nepotism and place me under suspicion. Still, I'll speak to the Minister about it. I just cannot make promises." He recognized her expression as she read her notepad, her quill tucking into her hand, and his voice softened. "Mary. You're young. You haven't seen much. Trust me that I know best."

"Of course, sir. How silly of me to think a young woman like myself could know half as much as someone in your position."

Mary was dismissed from their meeting and closed the door behind her before letting out a frustrated sign. She took a seat at her desk before grunting, "How long have you been listening, Junior?"

Barty Junior stepped out of the shadows and said, "Long enough for me to hear you request Franklin Long-ass be brought back as an Auror."

"So you'll know exactly where to find him," she said flatly as she fussed over her paperwork atop the desk. "Trust me, Barty. I know what I'm doing. I thought you were at lunch with your mother."

"Yes, at father's suggestion. He wants me out of the way... he's onto me."

"I wouldn't be so sure. Unless you think he wants you dead." She handed him her notepad and watched as he raised an eyebrow to it.

"So, father is taking drastic measures now."

"He and the counsel are also are enforcing quarter laws on Wizarding communities. If for some reason, an Auror needs to take up residence in someone's home to better catch nearby Death Eaters, they can."

"Could work for us, too," he muttered. "We can send spies of our own."

"You already have a spy. Me."

"A careless one." He watched as Mary attempted to organize her desk before saying, "So who saw you?"

"What?" She looked up and read his expression, realizing his meaning. He'd seen her arrive late to their most recent meeting and clocked her distracted expression. "It was that noticeable?"

"To me. So who was it that caught you?"

"Not sure," she lied. "Someone in Knockturn saw my hood off then ran the other direction. For all I know it was just a homeless wizard trying to pawn something."

"At four in the morning?"

"Well whoever it was hasn't turned me in, otherwise Dumbledore would be banging down the door as we speak."

Suddenly there was a pounding at the office door and Barty watched gleefully as if experiencing a live duel.

"Find this amusing do you?" Mary asked, yet her heart pounded.

"Don't mean to look so happy, MacDonald, but you can't blame me for finding the suspense utterly thrilling."

Mary simply ignored him and approached the door with great poise. She carefully opened the door to the office and was shocked to greet Victor Crabbe on the threshold.

"You!" Barty stood upright from where he'd been leaning on Mary's desk. "What are you doing here?"

"I have my own Ministry Connection's, boy. I may have lost favor with the Dark Lord but I did not loose my reputation here as a man of legal business."

Mary shushed the man and pulled him into the room. "Keep your voice down. Barty's father is on the other side of that door."

"I'd hope so. I'm here to see him."

"Why?" Barty scoffed and Victor just looked smugly at him.

Mary grew impatient after a silent moment. "He's going to turn you in, Barty. He's going to turn both of us in."

"Why you two-timing, scum-"

"Two timing?" He chuckled. "I attempted to earn my way back in your ranks by sharing some of the The Prophecy about the Guardian with you and then you refused to allow me to continue in our work in your ranks. Did you think I'd then turn over The Guardian for nothing?"

"Well you only told us the cliff-notes version of the bloody thing. For all we know you made it up to claim someone brought you the Prophecy."

"Barty..." Mary motioned him towards the door. "Keep your father distracted."

"Don't tell me you're going to give this loon the satisfaction of your ear, MacDonald..."

"Just do as I say for once!" She snapped, opened the door to his father's office and shoved him in.

Mary took a breath when she and Crabbe were alone. "I've been trying desperately to get someone to speak with me about the prophecy - someone who has heard it's message I mean."

"I know every word."

"Hmmm," Mary said. "That's a lie... still, I'll bite. Go on."

"I told Bellatrix and her husband that it spoke of a traitor, sworn to protect Voldemort. He would betray his friends and join our ranks to bring back Voldemort one day should he fall during the war."

Mary stayed silent and Crabbe grew uneasy.

"So... I decided to keep the description of the Guardian to myself until I secured a prominent seat in Voldemort's ranks. Of course it's been some time and no such offer has been extended."

Mary's stare looked almost ghostly as if she was listening to an entirely different conversation.

He began to stammer nervously, "T-this is my proposal... one of you tell me the next Death Eater meeting time and place so that I may join your ranks, or I'll march into that office and tell Crouch Sr. exactly who his son and his secretary really work for."

"The next meeting is to be this Friday morning around 3am at Borgin and Burkes in the back room. Come in the side door off the alley and arrive before Bellatrix so she doesn't see you. Keep your head down and mouth shut until the end." Mary coolly said and she stood. "Is that enough?"

Crabbe blinked, "Just like that?"

"Just like that," she smirked.

He stood, flustered and said, "But you didn't ask me about the Guardian."

"I didn't have to. I know everything the Pettigrew boy told you."

"H-how?" He grumbled. "Who told you?"

"You just did," she gave a sly grin, "Thank you, for your contribution to the cause. Please don't let the floo burn you on the way out."

Olde York - February 13, 1980...

The Bones family consisted of some of the strongest wizards of their day, making them a threat to the Dark Lord and forcing them into hiding. Edgar Bones was a skilled alchemist, a trade that was as dangerous as it was valuable. After Voldemort's recent attempt to have Death Eaters capture Edgar for his skills, he relocated his family to his late mother's home in Olde York.

Under the concealment of James' invisibility cloak, Remus approched the end of a long alley in a tiny neighborhood of medieval homes. He looked all around him, uncertain if he had the right place, and removed the hood of the cloak to reveal his head. "Edgar?" he whispered.

"Remus."

The startled boy whirrled around to face the man. "Ed!"

"Dumbledore said you'd be coming."

"W-where did you come from? Dumbledore said this is where your home was..."

"Still is. It's right in front of you." Edgar rest a hand on Remus' invisible shoulder and gently pulled him forward.

"In front of me? That's just a... wall." When he looked back, the wall had become the facing of an ancient home, crooked and aging like the shops of Diagon Alley, but still there where it wasn't before.

"Fidellus Charm. Dumbledore is the only one who knows our whereabouts and can find the place. Everyone else has to be shown it by one who knows. We helped the McKinnons setup the same charm on their castle."

"Of course. Brilliant." He stared at the door solumnly. "So... he's in there?"

"Your dad? Aye. Dumbledore instructed him to come here until we were certain Voldemort was off his scent. Come in out of the cold now."

As soon as Remus had entered, he was overwhelmed by the size of the place. It reminded him of wizard tents that always appeared so small on the outside but massive on the inside. The laugher of children warmed him. Edgar had two children, 9 and 6, who were running about the house in oversized coats and tophats.

"The eldest one is Joanna, she's called JoJo and the younger is Jude," He smirked as the coatrack hook snatched James' cloak and hung it up. "You can tell my wife and I are Beetles fans."

"What are they doing?" Remus asked, his expression still exhausted and unamused.

"Playing, muggle," he chuckled as he watched his two children run around, the youngest with the tophat covering his eyes.

"Jude's not getting very far with his hat over his eyes like that..."

Edgar's expressions softened as he lowered his voice, "Jude lost his sight as a toddler. The result of one of my alchemy experiments gone wrong. I've not allowed the children near my work since that day..."

"Ed, I'm so sorry."

Edgar rest his hand on Remus shoulder and said, "Parent's aren't perfect, Remus. We try and fail so many times. We blame ourselves for everything. Just when we think we've learned what's best for our child, the rules change, the world changes and nothing we can do will ever prepare our child for grief or pain. All we can do is ask for grace from our kids when they're older and love them unconditionally in the meantime."

Remus just nodded, choking back the pain of his grief as Ed nodded to the sitting room door. "Sylvia and I will be getting lunch together in the kitchen. You're welcome to join us when you're ready."

Remus slowly approached the door. He peeked into the small sitting room and saw his father resting his eyes as he let the sun from a stained glass window hit his face. He seemed so withdrawn from the world and yet so strong. Remus had always admired that strength.

"Dad?" Remus voice cracked upon entering the sitting room which seemed more like an elaborate library, covered in books.

Lyall Lupin sat up straight instantly and looked to the door. When he caught sight of his son, he pushed from the chair and met Remus in the center of the room, embracing him tightly. "Oh, my son."

"Dad... I..."

"She loved you so much, Remus. Your mother loved you more than you could ever know."

Remus did his best to contain himself, not wanting to show his father just how broken he felt so he said nothing as his father kept him in a tight embrace.

Later...

"Theseus was on the warpath against the Minister." Lyall explained as he and Remus now sat in the armchairs beside the crackling fire. "I don't know what happened between the two but he didn't trust him any more to have the best intensions. Fear can make someone do drastic things. Theseus was always level-headed so the minute he starts getting emotional, you know it's serious. He asked Madeye and I to accompany him to the Ministry and use our connects across departments to remove the man."

"Like an impeachment? Can you do that?"

"It's been done before. The Minister wasn't popular and with Voldemort getting stronger, it didn't take much for us to get enough assistance."

"And then you went home..." Remus said and he gripped the arms of his chair, white knuckled.

"I did, yes."

The silence that followed was heavy enough to crush cities when Remus broke it by sternly saying, "Just tell me. Tell me how you found her."

"What good will that do?"

"If she was here she'd be saying you can't hide things from me."

"Well she's not!" Lyall said, his shout echoing through the room. Lyall Lupin rarely raised his voice. He smacked down his teacup, stormed to the window and looked out the stained glass, trying to hide the heartbreak on his face. "I did everything right, Remus! Everything! I told her the truth about my magic after we met, I was prepared to educate you at home after you were turned, your wolf as it grew, I stepped down from my role at work to protect our family! I did it all right except one thing. I opened my stupid mouth at work one day fifteen years ago and everyone else has paid for it since! This should't have happened!"

"Dad-"

"It was me he was after! Not your mother. She was just-" his voice choked, his back still to his son, "She was just an innocent woman, waiting for us to come home and was greeted by a monster instead."

"Dad, I don't think this was about Greyback," Remus said keeping his eyes shut tightly to hold back angry tears. "I think it was about Tom Riddle."

Lyall faced his son who finally opened his eyes to see his father's complexion white as a ghost, "Where did you hear that name?"

"I read about it, or James did, in one of his father's files. He worked for him as Youth Representative of the Wizengamot but -"

"Yes, I know who he was," Lyall said, his voice calmer now. "I remember when that happened. I made prefect that year and the Slytherin boys wouldn't stop bragging about the Riddle's ministry appointment. Odd business though."

"What was odd about it?"

"Well, it was Slughorn. Every time one of his potion kids so much as sneezed properly, he'd boast about it as if he'd aquired a shiny new star pendant for his lapel. For years he raved about that class of Slubclub Students. Charlie Delaney, Gambley Bones, Caprious Lestrange, Terrance Bulstrode all of them got his praise but Tom was different. The man seemed infatuated with the boy and the rest of us were terrified by him. Then 'the indicident' happened and we all couldn't help but notice that Slughorn rarely brought up Tom's name again. He seemed just as afraid of the kid as the rest of us. We thought it odd that Slughorn didn't so much as nod with approval when Riddle's appointment at the Ministry was mentioned.

"What incident, Dad?"

"It involved a young muggle student who passed away suspiciously. Nobody brought it up for years and Rebeus got blamed for it and kicked out of school."

"Hagrid?"

"Mhmm. I remember looking up the case when I got my job at the Ministry. It had never sat right with me. I'd been up past curfew that night with Amos Longbottom, Frank's father. He kept fussing about some toad. We heard someone inside scream and every creature on the moors and around the lake went ghostly silent as if they could hear something we couldn't and were afraid of it more than the scream. I found out Fleamont Potter tried reopening the case but never finished and had quit shortly after starting his investigation."

"Some of us think that maybe... Mr. Potter's dragon-pox weren't accidental."

"Well add me to that list of theorists."

"Really?"

"Of course," he gave an anxious breath and began to pace. "You think I don't notice half my graduating class has avoided this war like the plague and those of us who haven't have already died or gone missing. I just never thought they'd go after your mother. I hardly knew the Riddle boy. But I suppose that isn't what matters."

"What does matter?"

"What matters is who Tom Riddle became." He spotted Remus open his mouth but held up his hand to stop him. "Don't ask, Remus. I won't have them come after you for knowing the truth."

"Come after me?" Remus grunted. "Come after me?!" He shoved himself from his chair and stood tall. "They already do come after me, Dad. They come after all my friends and we don't know Tom Riddle from Peter Piper! They had Edna arrested-"

Mr. Lupin motioned to quiet him, as the Bones children still feared for their aunt and he didn't want them to hear.

"Tabitha's gone. My best friends are threatened constantly. Ted's family was almost killed and McKinnon was kidnapped. Now they go after my mother. You think not knowing someone's identity protects me from anything?"

"Yes, I do!" Lyall snapped. "Son, I won't insult you by suggesting you know nothing about this world. Merlin knows that couldn't be farther from the truth. But there are some things about the Dark Arts you don't understand and that the Death Eaters will go to great lengths to protect. There are worse things than death, Remus. I won't walk into my home again and find my son's dismembered on the bloody kitchen floor because I burdened him with something that would make him a target!"

Remus grew ghostly quiet, save for his deep breaths that were louder than the crack of the fire or the thud of the books that had been enchanted to organize themselves on the shelves. Lyall turned his face away again as he realized the words that had escaped his mouth and how he'd said too much. "Dis... dismembered?" Remus' voice broke and he practically collapsed into his chair. "Mum?"

"I told you... knowledge is a burden." Lyall leaned on the windowsill and Remus heard muffle sobs as the man tried to silently hide his weeping.

Remus's mind began to swarm. "I... I'm going to be sick..."

Meanwhile at The Safe House...

James watched through the window carefully, waiting for any sign of Remus when he heard the clanging of potions coming from the sitting room. He knew exactly what he'd find as soon as he rounded the corner. Sure enough, Lily had already assembled an apothecary on the floor of the small room and sat in the midst of it on the rug, beakers and ingredients levitating all around her and the small cauldron boiling in front of her.

"Brewing enough wolfsbane potion for an entire colony, are you?"

"I just want to ensure he has enough for the next couple of months."

"That's kind of you." Her lack of response and hyper-focus on her work made him realize the rational his wife had already come to grips with. Remus was likely going to retreat again to protect everyone.

Lily just took a deep breath, her ingredients swirling faster, and James dodged them to take a seat on the floor beside her. He knew her well - knew that when the moment seemed dire, she'd refrain from saying anything. So instead, he just said, "Cauldron's too hot."

"It's fine."

"It's too hot. Slughorn always told you you brew too hot when you're rushing."

"It's a copper cauldron, it brews faster," she smacked his hand away gently as he reached to turn down the heat.

"You're going to burn a hole in the rug."

"It's an ugly rug."

"It's an antique rug."

"He's going to run," she blurted out but stayed focused on her work.

"I know," he whispered and picked up the wolfsbane flower to begin pressing it with the motar and pestle. "I feel like every time we get him back, something happens to push him away again."

"Did he ever tell you where he was the year following graduation?"

"No," James sighed then looked up from his work. "Did he tell you?"

Lily didn't answer but just went back to her work.

"We said no secrets, Lily."

"It's not mine to tell, James. All I can say is if he leaves us again, I don't think he'll be coming back and he'll be going somewhere bad."

"And Tabitha? You think she stands a chance out there on her own while we find her wand?"

"I don't see a way out of this, even if we find Max. She still has the vow on her." Lily merely shook her head, "This is why the two of them always feared closeness with anyone for fear of losing them. Neither of them opened up to anyone really."

"Except us," James said as he began to snack on a bit of honeycomb from her potion kit. "Then Sirius pulled that stupid prank in school. I handled it badly too. I thought we'd never recover from that."

"I scolded him too much the other night - Sirius. I was just so cross that I didn't get to say goodbye to her... again."

"I was too, but it's nothing compared to the verbal thrashing Remus gave him. Honestly, Lily I don't see how they can be in this tiny house."

"Maybe they need time apart."

"No," he said defensively.

"James..."

"We don't split up, Lily. We never have."

"Until the entire year after school. And you all managed to find each other again." She sighed, "Remus needs to feel he has space to grieve, James, otherwise he will run."

"But is it safe for them to be on their own right now?

"Maybe there's a simpler solution than that."

Later at the Bones' home...

Remus' head spun worse than a hangover as he exited the water closet where he'd emptied his stomach into the toilet. Every time he thought he was done, he visualized his mother's body on the floor of the home she'd always made so warm and inviting. Her voice echoed, 'I love you, Cricket', over and over in his mind. Now the room was steady again and he wandered to the back patio of the home to gain some fresh air.

"I'm so sorry, Mum," he whispered after a few deep breaths of the winter air. After a moment though, Remus grew uneasy with the feeling he was being watched. He slowly looked around the patio and noticed a girl, about 13, with incredibly long brown hair braided to her waist, in a simple white sweater and plaid skirt with a tartan blanket wrapped around her. "Blimey!"

"Hi."

"H-Hi..." Remus caught his breath after being startled. The child just stared at him with such intensity that Remus had to make sure she wasn't casting a nonverbal spell on him. "I didn't know anyone was out here."

"You're Mr. Lupin's son?"

"Yes. Who are you?"

"I'm Lydia."

Remus waited for a moment for some elaboration, yet none came, so he asked, "Why are you out here, Lydia?"

"It's quiet."

"I guess so. It's a bit cold though," She didn't answer so he added. "I didn't know Ed had another daughter."

"He doesn't," she gazed off at the dead grass and withered plants in the lawn, her tone so apathetic with her short responses.

"Um... do they know you're out here?"

"Yes. I live here when I'm not at school?"

"Oh, you go to Hogwarts then?"

"Mhmm," she gave a single nod. "I don't like it there. It's loud."

"Yes," Remus relaxed a bit now and was grateful for the conversation as it distracted him from the shock he'd just endured. "It can be during classes and feast days. I always liked going to the lake or the library for quiet."

"They're loud too, night and day. Even the library. Only in common room I can't hear the whispers."

"Whisper?"

"In the walls," she turned her head slowly and gazed at him. "I hear it talking, hoping someone will hear and understand it's language. It can't climb to Ravenclaw tower though. I can be in the quiet there."

Remus entered a bit of a staring contest with the child and for a moment wondered if what he was experiencing was a supernatural encounter, as the girl was so cryptic and quite bizarre. He nearly jumped out of his skin when he heard his father's voice. "Remus?"

"Dad!" Remus instantly pointed to the girl that was sitting on the stone wall. "This is Lydia."

"Yes, we've met. She's Edna's daughter." He gave a soft smile to Lydia who reciprocated then went back to staring into the distance.

Remus entered the house, checking over his shoulder once more to look at the girl then joined his father in the foyer who had finished his tears and collected himself. "I didn't know Edna had a daughter."

"She's adopted. Edna was so fond of you, always stealing sweets from her desk when you'd come visit me at the office. I think it helped her realize how badly she wished to be a mother. She adopted Lydia as a toddler and raised her."

"So that's why she's acting so strange. She's probably in shock about her mother missing."

"Perhaps," Lyall gazed at the double doors that lead to the patio. "But Lydia has always been very... gifted. Ed tells me she's a linguist. She's always been able to understand every tongue, even if she's never heard the language before. Sometimes he thinks she hears supernatural languages that the common ear can't."

"Maybe she can help us with breaking the code to better communication," Remus sadly jokes. "Perhaps we wouldn't run away from each other at the first sign of sadness."

"Remus, I-"

"Dad, I forgive you." Remus whispered. "I know my whole life I've told you it wasn't your fault what happened to me and it isn't your fault what happened to Mum, but... I'm starting to realize that maybe that's not what you want to hear. If you're so hell bent on feeling responsible for all this then maybe all you need to hear is... I forgive you."

Lyall's shoulders noticebly relaxed and he said, "Thank you, Remus..."

"I just hope one day I can seek forgiveness too from the pain I've cause you and everyone else."

"What pain could you possible have caused?"

"Plenty," he grumbled. He wouldn't admit it, but he even felt responsible for the pain his father was in now. Greyback didn't have to go after the Lupin's that night. It could have been any Death Eater eater who may have even spared his mother's life since she wasn't the indented target. "But if you want to claim responsibility for your actions, then I get to do the same."

"What do you mean?"

"I'm a bloody werewolf. That's not changing. Maybe it's time I stop fighting it... and claim it."

Ok, I lied. NEXT chapter will be the time jump. We are going a few weeks forward then going into springtime. 1980 is taking more time than I realized so instead of doing 1 book per year, it may be 1 that covers six month periods like the last one. Thoughts?