Book III: Requiem of Ashes
Chapter III: Outed
Music Theme: My Sweet Lord - George Harrison
Hogwarts - January 1977...
Sirius and Marlene had found a quiet spot in Greenhouse Three, underneath one of the tall planting tables. Marlene sat in Sirius' lap, her legs wrapped around him as he slid his hand under her Gryffindor jumper and up her back. She ran her fingers through his hair but gripped his locks and pulled his head out of their kiss when she said, "Not the bra, Black..."
"Come on," he smirked, "let me get you a little messy. All the good herbology students are doing it."
"No... we aren't doing that tonight. We talked about this."
"We talked about it?" He feigned forgetfulness. "I don't recall."
"We agreed," she said but released his hair so he could kiss her neck, "That out of respect for our roommates, we wouldn't hook up. It's just going to complicate things."
"Just because Evans and Potter don't get along doesn't mean you and I can't have a roll in the soil," he said between each kiss.
"Sirius," she grinned and he stopped and looked at her.
"Fine. No doing-it while our bestfriends are enemies. Damn us for being such good chums."
"I know," she smiled.
"Still. If Evans ever pisses you off and you wish to get back at her someway," he sighed over dramatically, "I'll make the sacrifice. McKinnon. You can have all of me. I'll try not to resist. It will be hard on James but... I'll do for you. I'll let you take my body as your revenge. But please... oh please... be gentle with me." He forced some fake crying.
She just rolled her eyes and grabbed his collar, pulling his lips against hers to shut him up when they heard a soft voice.
"P-Padfoot?"
Sirius harshly pulled out of the kiss and rammed his head into the greenhouse table in the process. Marlene and he looked up at Peter who stood anxiously watching.
"Pettigrew?" Marlene snapped. "You're just standing there watching us, you pervert?"
"Go on easy on him, McKinnon. He doesn't get much action." Sirius swung Marlene out of his lap and climbed out from under the table. "Come here, Pete." He grasped the plump boy's arm and hauled him across the greenhouse. He harshly whispered, "How did you find me? I-" Suddenly Sirius started searching the lad's pockets until he found the Marauder's Map in his back pocket. Sirius held it up and waived it in front of his face. "We agreed to allow each other privacy with this thing, Wormtail? We use it for mischeif and always together, never on our own to spy on one another."
"Sorry, Padfoot," Peter fumbled with his hands, "I got bored. Remus has a prefect meeting and I was waiting for James to come back from Quidditch practice but..."
"But?!" Sirius said impatiently.
Peter just pulled the map away and opened it, its contents still active as the small list of names scurried about the blueprint of the castle. Sirius saw the three of them in Greehouse Three, Remus along with a slew of Prefects - Samantha Tibbets, Alice Longbottom, Meredith Avery and the like gathered in the great hall. What he didn't see in its proper place though was James' name. He wasn't on the pitch, in common room, the great hall. He was in the owlery with Lily Evans beside him."
"I don't know about you," Peter said, "But it's a bit late to be sending owls."
"Sirius?" Marlene called.
Sirius quickly folded the map and shoved it in Peter's hands who muttered "Mischief Managed" and concealed it's contents.
"Can whatever you and Pettigrew have to discuss wait?" Marlene added as she emerged from under the table and walked up to the boys.
Sirius crossed his arms and said, "Marleen... I don't think we're the only ones snogging in secret."
McKinnon Castle - August 20, 1980...
"You're late!" Called Marvin up the stone spiral steps of the castle as his aunt rounded them and covered her ears.
"Blimey, can't you lot get an intercom system," she fussed.
"Are you going to the meeting?" He asked, ignoring her comment. "Dumbledore would love to have you."
"Don't get me started on all that," she huffed and passed him as she approached the tea table where Mae had already made and stout scones like old times. "Will Madeye be there?" She called over her shoulder.
"Of course he will," Marvin muttered and strolled across the large room towards the sofas. He watched as his young Aunt found the teapot on the tray empty and smacked it back down. She passed him and walked towards the kitchen but didn't say anything else, even when he prompted her with, "Why do you ask?" She seemed to be making too much effort to act casual at his request. "Something going on between you two?"
"I just haven't seen him since I left the ministry, is all. Can be a bit odd... seeing your old boss."
"He forgave Dad," Marvin told her, causing her to stop. "About the werewolf camp?"
"He told you about that?" She asked over her shoulder.
"Of course he did. We had to know there was truth to the rumors, Aunt Elsie. It's the only way to face things."
"Face things..." she whispered to herself. Marvin felt an eternal stillness in her pause as she clearly had an internal conversation with herself.
"So?" He asked calmly. "Will you come?"
She finally turned to face him, her normal smile appearing again. "I'll just get in the way. You lot have fun though."
"I'm not going," he sighed. "Potters and Longbottoms will be there. No telling what this blood curse will trigger if I come across them."
"Then perhaps I get us some tea and we have a nice night in?" She grinned.
"Sounds grand, Aunt E," Marvin said with a smile.
Elspeth turned to the corridor doorway but it burst open just as she grabbed the handle and she had to side step and raise her arms like London Bridge as Angus emerged and ducked under them as if in a frantic dance. "Where's the fire, McKinnon?"
"Sorry Aunt Elsie," Angus said anxiously as he straightened his vest then held the door for his Aunt to move towards the kitchens.
"Don't you look smart," Marvin said once he and his brother were alone. "How much gel is in your bloody hair?"
"Rain keeps forcing the frizz," he muttered as he slicked his sandy locks back. "Is the vest too much?"
Marvin grinned, "Let me guess... Gideon's going to be at the meeting today?"
"He sent a note saying he would," Angus muttered. "We've not seen each other since Mary's death."
"What about Fabian?" Marvin asked as he drew his wand and flicked it towards the windows to close them, attempting to rest his brother's anxieties about the humidity.
"Last I heard, he still won't be there."
"But he will be at the trial, surely? His testimony is needed to put Mulciber away for good."
"All I know is what's Gid's told me," he muttered as he walked towards the mirror by the door and straightened his tie.
"You're the only person who dresses up for a meeting because your crush is there," Marvin chuckled.
Just as he said it Marlene rushed down the steps to join her brothers and immediately moved towards the mirror where Angus stood, pushing him away to check her hair.
Angus grinned at her and looked at Marvin to whisper, "You were saying?"
"Hoping to impress someone at the meeting, Marlene?" Marvin called.
"Don't be daft," their sister replied as she fixed her blonde strands. "Just been a while since I've seen everyone."
"Been a while since you've seen Sirius, too," Marvin said.
"You're mad," she grunted but quickly became self-contious and stopped primping. "I've moved on from that selfish child."
"Sure you have," Marvin whispered and checked his watch. "You lot better go."
"I wish you could come," Marlene said and approached her brother to take his hand.
"Curse will be broken one day," Marvin said. "Until then we shouldn't tempt it. We've had enough surprises as it is."
But even as he said it, there was a banging on the door. Everyone froze and it became so quiet that they could hear the flickering of the candle wicks in the antique chandelier above their heads. They waited until the knock came again and Marlene started towards the door only for Marvin to grab her arm and hold her back. He gave a nod towards Angus who cautiously approached the door with his wand.
"I don't understand," Marlene whispered. "We setup a blood charm. Only family can find the castle."
Marvin shushed her and they waited as Angus used a one-way transparency charm on the door to see who the visitor was. Upon view, everyone froze. Standing on their doorstep, almost unrecognizable with his humble outdoor clothing and short beard, was their eldest brother Atticus Óg. Angus turned to look at his siblings and all he saw on their faces was hurt and confusion. Still, he opened the door.
"Hey little brother," Atticus Óg muttered with a soft smile.
Angus stared at him a long while thinking of what to say but all that emerged was, "How's dragon studies going?"
Atticus' face fell and he said, "Well... I guess you know I haven't been studying with Newt for some time."
"We figured when we didn't hear from you for a bloody year," Angus snapped, still refusing to let his brother enter. His body language was stiff like a Buckingham palace guard as he blocked the entrance to the home.
"Can I come in?"
"No," Marvin answered from the back of the room.
Everyone was startled at his response. The most open-minded and gracious of all the McKinnons now seemed bitter and angry at the sight of his brother. Angus was the first to speak up, "Marv, we need to let him explain." Angus stepped aside and Atticus Og entered the castle, looking around.
He kept his head low like a dog entering the room after damaging the yard, hands in his pockets, not speaking. After awkward silence he finally forced out, "Like what you've done with the place. It looks grand."
"No thanks to you," Marlene whispered. "Took us months to fix between missions and obductions."
"I heard of that," Atticus said.
"How?" Angus asked confused.
"We're late, Angus," Marlene said and pulled her arm from Marvin's grasp. She approached the door and Angus gave an apologetic look to his brother but allowed Marlene to take his hand and pull him towards the door.
As his sister passed him, Atticus Og whispered, "Marlene, please. Can we talk? We're family..."
"No," Marlene cut him off. "No, family doesn't walk out after their father's death leaving the rest to pick up the pieces." Angry tears formed in her eyes. "We started thinking you were dead, Atti. You don't get to come back now and act like everything is fine. You don't get that right." She gave a tug on Angus' hand and pulled him with her out the door. When it slammed shut, the flames in the chandelier flashed like flares for a moment then dimmed.
Now Marvin and Atticus Og were left to square off in the foyer. The elder turned to the younger and muttered. "Well? Let's have it out then."
"Have it out? It's bad enough you lot are reacting this way. Do we really need to make this worse with an argument?" He huffed then started to strut around the room, clearly more confident now that he wasn't outnumbered.
"Reacting this way?" Marvin defended as he followed the elder brother about. "Did you think we'd embrace you with open arms?"
"Where's Mam?" Atticus requested as he peeked around different corners and up the stairwell like a scout.
"Don't change the subject!" Marvin shouted which finally got the attention of his elder brother. Something in Marvin seemed to crack a bit as his voice reached a volume and tone he rarely used, "Do you have any idea what we've been through? Do you know what we deal with every day, not just because of this war but because of... because of what our family has always been destined to face? And now you walk in here, prodigal son returning, thinking the beloved eldest can sit back on his family throne and do no wrong?"
"That's not fair," Atticus muttered.
"You abandoned me with this burden, Atticus." Marvin snapped. "Maybe you abandoned all of us... but me more than most because I know what our fate is and you've left me to face it alone."
Atticus waited for his brother to huff out some breaths. Marvin turned and walked to the long table that stretched across the west wall, the repaired stained glass windows casting moonlight into the dark room. He plopped down on his chair and rest his head back, closing his eyes, and focusing on memories of family dinners when life was simpler.
"I didn't think you remembered," Atticus muttered, "You were a kid."
"How could I forget? How could I not see the misfortune that follows our bloody family?" Marvin replied, his voice now raised to nothing but anger.
"We don't know that the curse is true," Atticus snapped back defensively at Marvin's tone.
"Dad was murdered in his own home. Our home was burned. I've fallen for a Death Eater who has a blood hold on me..."
"Angus and Marlene still have hope. Their lives could still turn out normal. Ang could meet a nice, normal girl and-"
"Angus is gay, you idiot." Marvin shrugged, finally tired of being anything but blunt.
"Gay about what?" Atticus naively asked.
"Get with the times, knuckle head," Marvin grumbled to himself like a cranky old man.
"Oh.. Oh!. " Atticus blinked. "Wow... how did I not see that?"
"Maybe because you haven't been here. Maybe because you shut us out and don't know us at all," Marvin sighed and slumped into his chair.
Atticus approached his brother, some humility now in his stance. He sat at the chair beside him and said, "We don't know that the family curse is real. Lots of people have complicated relationships. It doesn't mean misfortune is our family curse."
Marvin stared at the floor, his faint reflection staring back at him in the stone. When he'd collected his thoughts he said, "Her powers have come back."
"Marlene's?" Atticus leaned in a bit.
"And they know about them," Marivn added.
"Who..."
"The Death Eaters."
"Who... specifically," Atticus growled.
"Lestrange," Marvin muttered. "He saw it first hand."
Atticus' air huffed out of his chest in a shocked sigh and he leaned back on the large table, staring off into the shadows of the castle. "Does Marlene know anything about where the magic comes from?" he asked.
"No..." Marvin looked up with a scowl and said, "I've been carrying that secret by myself since I was five years old."
"Nothing is set in stone," Atticus said. "We could be looking at everything wrong. It may not be as bad as we think it is. It's not like we are less fortunate than most." He motioned to the restored castle walls around him.
"Well even so, I don't understand how Dad's murder is a blessing..."
"Murder? Angus told you then?"
Marvin nodded and added, "About Greyback? Yes. And Madeye told us how Dad murdered all those werewolves."
"You can't believe everything you hear, Marvin," Atticus quickly said in response and took a step forward as if he had to catch his brother's thought before it spiraled.
"That's what Angus said. He keeps digging for more answers."
Atticus remained silent a long while, contemplating his next words. Marvin sensed the rise in tension and looked at his brother who finally said simply, "Tell him to stop digging."
After Hours at the Ministry of Magic...
The ceiling seemed to spin as Snape gazed at it from his seat at the desk of the late Mary MacDonald. It was empty now, all papers cleaned out as well as any sign the woman even existed. The leather chair creaked as Snape leaned back in it. He sat alone in the quite offices and thought about all he'd done. He'd helped Regulus however he could, covering up the murder of Dennis Forrestor, dragging that man's remains to the Sein River and dumping him in in the dead of night the using a charm to hasten the body's decomposition. Regulus hadn't been brave enough to do it. He had slipped the vial of the virus into the grocery delivery he knew was destined for the Potter's hiding place, as he'd been instructed. He'd destroyed any sign their home ever existed. That bit he enjoyed, he wouldn't deny. He'd threatened James. Abandoned Lily. Devoted himself to the Dark Lord... and yet, he couldn't get a faint voice out of his mind that repeatedly said, "What is it all for?" He never knew what part of him asked that question, or why he plagued him. He answered it daily. It's for the cause. It's because muggles have to know their place. It's because Voldemort is the future. But as Snape reflected on how far he'd come in only a couple years on this journey, he couldn't help but wonder if those were really his answers to the question, or if they were answers imposed on him by others.
He was unfazed by the office door when it opened, not even removing an eye from the ceiling tiles, as he knew who was entering. Even the young man's steps sounded annoying as he entered. "What do you want Snape?" Barty Crouch Jr. hissed, with a look of resentment in his eye that had never been aimed at his friend before.
"Oh don't pout." Snape sat up. "I came to make sure you know your role in the Wizengamot trial. And to see if you and Travers were successful in... persuading Longbottom not to testify."
"It's his wife we need to worry about," Barty grunted, trying to avoid the admittance that he'd run from Longbottom and Dorcas Meadows and failed his assignment. "She'd offer up her memory to a pensive and reveal what she saw. That kind of testimony can't be denied."
"Just ensure you're there to stop her in case she does," Snape said and crossed his legs, the insecure questions of his mind now fading the presence of such a nervous young man.
"Why wouldn't I be?" When no answer came he turned to face the blank stare of Snape. "Oh... I see. The Dark Lord doesn't trust me anymore?"
"Would you blame his confidence for wavering? You let a spy into your office," Snape motioned to the desk in front of him as a reminder of the deceased secretary.
"I didn't let that witch in!" Barty snapped, "My father hired her!"
"But you let her into our ranks." Snape's confidence had now returned as he sat up straight, "Don't deny it Barty. What, did you actually think she was your friend? After growing close to a deserter like Regulus, I'd think you'd take better care of the company you keep."
"You're one to talk about Regulus," he hissed. "I find it a coincidence that two of my friends got a little close to you and now they're dead!" He snapped, then quickly recoiled at the realization he'd admitted to befriending a now known traitor and a suspected traitor of their cause.
"Enough," came a shrill voice. Snape shot out of his seat, ready to defend himself against an intruder, when the slender, pale figure of Mrs. Crouch entered the room. "What task have you come for, Snape, aside from tormenting my poor boy."
"Only to make sure he's where he needs to be for the trial, and acts accordingly," Snape said with caution. He'd never known fully where the loyalties lay with Crouch family, but it would seem Mrs. Crouch was loyal to their cause.
"Barty will be at the Ministry to ensure his cousin doesn't show up and present her testimony," Mrs. Crouch insisted. "Now if you would please leave! There is a good chance that Mulciber and Goyle could betray us to save their own skin. If they throw your pathetic name under the knightbus then I don't want it affecting my son."
"I'm here on orders, Mrs. Crouch," Snape scowled.
"And the Dark Lord will be protected by my son. I trust him. I do not trust you however," she said. "Now please... get out of my husband's office. Our family has dinner plans."
Snape tugged sharply on his vest to straighten it, brushed a loose strand of hair back, and bowed his head mockingly at her before taking his leave.
"Mother," Barty said when they were alone.
"Be silent," His mother snapped. The woman raced to the office door and peered out to ensure Snape was gone then closed it tightly.
Barty spoke up once more. "I failed tonight. I abandoned Travers. They've arrested him and..."
She hurried back to her sone and stopped him by holding the tips of her fingers to his lips. "Do not fret, my darling. It is your job to protect our Dark Lord's wishes. It's mine to protect you. And I shall." She gentle stroked his cheek and the young man in front of her seemed to morph into an infant. He leaned forward and nestled his head onto his mother's shoulder and she caressed it. The devolvement would have been unsettling at best to the average person. The bond between Mrs. Crouch and her son was not what most would consider healthy, but to Barty, it would be his saving grace.
Later at Hogwarts...
Night fell over Hogwarts and the castle itself seemed to blend into the evening sky as most corridors were dimly lit. Paintings were in hibernation season as the Fat Friar called it. They got as much sleep as they could before students returned for the term. All hours of the night they'd be kept up with student's out of bed, teachers rushing to prep lessons and Filch keeping his hallways clean. There was still a shroud of sadness over the castle at the wake of Scammander's funeral, despite it being almost a month since his passing, but the return of Order meetings without him or Mary made it equally ominous. Others were missing as well. The Bones did not attend as they grieved their family's loss and comforted Edna's daughter, Lydia, at home. Marvin was unable to attend due to the risk of crossing paths with the Potters or Longbottoms. Everyone knew Fabian wanted no part in Order business due to Mary's death but could feel only part of that story was being told. Ministry members such as Dorcas Meadows and Elphias Dodge prepped for the upcoming trial in leu of attending the meeting, as that's where the Order needed them most. It would be a unique assembly, but there was some joy to be had in the reunion as everyone moved forward with the task at hand.
Gideon had arrived first to visit Dumbledore's office with the handful of magazine's his brother-in-law had supplied. He waited as Dumbledore read through the 'Little Pheonix' poem and now flipped through the pages of the Quibbler on his desk.
"I knew you'd want to see them sir," Gideon said. "It seems Lovegood knows about the order."
"Perhaps," Dumbledore said and closed the magazine. "Even if he did, though, the Lovegoods are no enemies to us."
"Are you sure?" Gideon asked. "His wife is a Malfoy."
Dumbledore laughed and said, "Last I checked, prejudice isn't a disease that can be caught due to blood relation. The Lovegood's are good people."
"So... you trust them?" Gideon asked.
Dumbledore had leaned back in his chair and was stroking his beard when he realized a question had been asked of him. "Hmm? Oh," he said up and shook his head. "No. I won't say that. Not trust with Order business that is. His head is in the right place and always has been. But the heart can easily be taken advantage of, so while I'd trust the Lovegood's with most things, I'd not be able to trust them with this. It is why the Order invitation was not extended to them."
Gideon walked over to the desk and nodded to the magazine as if to ask permission to review it again. He spun it around and flipped through the pages again and said, "Then... how'd he find out?"
"He didn't. Mr. Lovegood is an editor not a writer. Someone would have submitted this to him. It's a warning. It's trying to get someone's attention."
"Who?" Gideon asked.
Dumbledore folded his hands and said, "Mine..."
Gideon was unsure what to say to that. He stood in silence and released the magazine back to the table as it felt more like someone's personal mail now.
"May I keep this, Gideon?" Dumbledore asked.
"Of course sir," Gideon nodded and stepped back. "I'll let you read it more. I'll see you at the Room of Requirement."
Dumbledore thanked him and he parted swiftly in an attempt to escape the awkward silence. Once in the hall, he used his wand to illuminate the corridors.
He had barely rounded the corner when he was grabbed from behind. Every possibility ran through his head. Had Hogwarts been infiltrated? Was he about to be cursed or kidnapped? If he yelled for help would it endanger the others? All these questions and more swirled through his mind before he could even aim his wand. He rolled around and his back landed against the stone wall. He winced, expecting a wand to be pressed against his neck, but instead a gentle hand caressed it. Everything happened so quickly, but he knew that kiss anywhere.
"Angus," He said with so much relief.
"We've got to stop meeting like this, I know... but it's payback for cornering me in the kitchen earlier this year," Angus shrugged but smiled.
"Oh, Ang," Gideon reached forward and wrapped the young man in a tight embrace. "I'm so sorry... I never intended to be gone so long."
"It's ok," Angus said, running his hand up Gideons back and holding him close. "Your brother needed you... something I wish my brother understood."
"What do you mean?" Gideon said pulling back and facing him.
"It's not important right now," Angus said sadly but then beamed. "What's important is you. And me. I'm not going to fuck it up this time, Gid. I swear. No more hiding. You were right. I was so afraid to lose everything that I controlled it all too much... and started losing it anyway. Well, I can't lose you."
"You never would," Gideon said softly. "I'm not going anywhere." He leaned in for one more kiss before being haunted by the harsh grasp of a petit, boney hand. He whirled around and was shocked to find Seer Trelawney before them. "Seer? I mean... Professor?"
"You're wrong!" She said to him. Her voice brought every chill imaginable up his spine. It was hoarse and dark. "You are going. You're going down the path! Down the path with another... the same fates... the same fates!" She held out the last word until she choked, clearing her throat and blinking as if waking from a dream. When she was done, she removed her hand away from Gideon and yet she seemed shocked by his presence when she adjusted her glasses. "Oh! Goodness... You shouldn't be here yet. Our offices are closed until next week."
"We aren't students, Professor. I'm Gideon Prewett and this is Angus. We met you earlier this year?"
She simply blinked.
"My brother found your shop off Trefalger Square?"
"Oh! Yes! I remember. He spilled his tea all over my shop... but I appreciate your efforts to get my interview with Dumbledore. As you see. It worked." She beamed but Gideon's expression seemed to sadden her. "Oh dear... I've done it again haven't I? First to your brother and now to you. I'm so sorry. I can't help the things I say sometimes. And sometimes I can't remember what I've said." She sighed and turned to leave. "I should return to my office anyhow. It's my first semester with students and I' prefer not to have their faces look at me like that."
"Wait," Gideon took a step forward to stop her. "Do you mean to say you read a prophecy to my brother?"
"I must have. People always give me the same look when I've spoken about their fates."
"And you don't remember what it was?" He asked.
"Not off the top of my head. I'd have to consult the crystal to bring it to light." She tapped her chin and thought. "After your classes, come to my office. I'll have your reading then."
"Classes? We aren't-" Angus started but Gideon clasped his hand.
"Thank you, Professor. But we will come now if it's ok." The young seer then beamed and motioned down the hall, muttering to herself as she walked away. Gideon faced his boyfriend once more and said, "I'm sure Dumbledore doesn't want someone that scatter-brained knowing about the order. She may be innocent but she doesn't seem like she can keep a secret."
"But Fabian apparently can," Angus said. "Did he said she'd read a prophecy to him before?"
"No," he sighed. "But if it's as perilous as she made it sound, it would explain the way he's been." Gideon glanced down at the floor, still holding Angus by the hand. "I'm scared, Ang..."
"Me too," Angus said. "But whatever she says, I'm here with you."
Later...
"I don't like this," Sirius said checking her his shoulder as they wandered up the empty Hogwarts halls towards the room of requirement. "Harry shouldn't be here," he whispered to James.
"Look at you," James grinned with pride. "Such a protective watchdog over your godson."
"I'm serious, James." Sirius caught sight of James' familiar smirk that he always donned before pointing out the pun of his name and the expression, but Sirius just said, "Don't."
"Padfoot, listen. I'm not letting my wife and kid out of my sight after coming face to face with that... thing," James said at the memory of Voldemort. "And you said yourself, you hardly notice Harry when he's wrapped against Lily's chest like that. He just sleeps. Nobody will notice him."
"No," Sirius said gruffly. "They'll just think your wife went up five cup sizes."
Suddenly Remus called from behind them. "Why do you care so much if Harry is here or not? Why do you want him back at the house so badly?"
"I just think he's safer there, Moony," Sirius said over his shoulder. "That's all."
But as they walked, Remus kept a careful eye on the young Black. Ever since Peter's warning, he'd grown suspicious of him. At the thought, Remus' eyes wandered to the silent boy beside him who withdrew more and more into himself since Harry's birth. "You ok, Wormtail? You've been quiet."
"Huh?" Peter looked up and lowered his voice. "I'm ok. I think I've got the same concerns you do... if you know what I mean."
Remus rest a hand on Peter's shoulder so the two of them would slow down and fall slightly behind the others. When he felt they were a good distance away he said, "I've been thinking about what you said."
"You believe me?" Peter said, a bit too eagerly, so he added in a whisper, "About what Max Forrestor said? That Sirius is his spy?"
"Well... that's what confuses me. Why would Max admit that to you if it was true?"
"He was going to kill me, Remus," He whispered. "He didn't think I'd have the chance to tell anyone. He didn't know about my rat or I bet he wouldn't have been so careless."
"If that's the case then we have to tell Dumbledore," Remus said.
"No!" Peter whispered harshly. "Sirius is too close to Harry."
"That's the point, Wormtail! I don't want him anywhere near Lily or Harry or James..."
"But, Moony. He could react badly if we confront him without proof."
"Without proof," Remus sighed and couldn't tell if he was relieved they'd found none yet or distressed that they had none. Either way, nothing would be accomplished today.
"I don't want him near me either, Remus," Peter admitted. "I'm scared."
"Just stick with me, Peter." Remus set his hand on his shoulder again. "I won't let anything happen to you. I swear."
The group journeyed into the room of requirement where the sparse gathering was already underway. Everyone seemed thrilled to see the Potter faction, aside from Marlene who just stared down at the table with her arms crossed, lost in thought. James was right, at first few people noticed Lily's wrap was any more than a way to keep warm in this damp halls, but Dumbledore clocked it immediately, followed quickly by Madeye. They were not delighted. Quite the opposite. Dumbledore looked almost disappointed as he met Lily's gaze and the words of his warning echoed in her ears...
Harry is your only priority now... trust no one...
Yet here she was, entrusting the safety of her son to the Order and he met her with a discouraging glance. Surely Dumbledore didn't doubt his own organization? The unsettling feeling made Lily regret her choices and instantly want to disaparate away, but this only made her more aware of that impossibility due to the wards around Hogwarts. She quickly realized this castle which had always proved to be a haven for her, could be a trap to her infant if an enemy was nearby.
James wrapped an arm around Lily, as if having her same thoughts at the cold reception of their old Headmaster. He skimmed other expressions and spotted Frank Longbottom, an empty chair beside him, and guilt overtook James at the realization that Alice had stayed away with Neville. Not only that, but Marvin McKinnon had stayed away too and the reminder as to why was absent to him as well.
Nobody dared acknowledge the child, other than a scoffing sound from Emmeline Vance as everyone took their seats.
The meeting felt stiff, at least to James. Remus couldn't keep from glancing across the table at Sirius who had his wand resting in his hand on the table like a body guard. Marlene didn't even seem to be paying attention, her mind racing with a million thoughts. And the shroud of the recent deaths hung over everyone like a dark clown.
It was not long before Dumbledore got to the task at hand. "There are rumors that the Ministry will be taken from inside by infiltration and from the outside by force," he said.
"Force?" Gideon leaned forward in his seat. "What do you mean sir?"
"A small army of intense strength has been assembled by Voldemort," Dumbledore said. "An unconventional one, yes, but strong just the same. And because of what kind of army this is... we think the attacks will happen... the eve of the full moon."
It would have taken a miracle to keep all eyes off Remus as people slipped him a glance at the mention of the moon. He felt a gentle touch of Peter's hand beside him which helped him find the words and say, "The werewolf army... the one Greyback assembled by force. All those young werewolves at full strength with their souls fading away. That's his army, isn't it?"
Dumbledore nodded.
"How can you be so sure?" Remus said, a bit more curt than intended.
"Alastor has received word from an old colleague who is closely associated with the sanctuary where you were spying, Remus," Dumbledore said. "It appears a former Ministry worker had eyes on the place as well and made the discovery."
Remus sent a darting look to James who just shook his head and Sirius clocked it right away. "What? What's going on?"
"James?" Lily called. "What is it?"
The sting of deception pierced James in his soul at Lily's voice and the memory of the promise to no longer have secrets between them began to weigh on him as he knew he was keeping Atticus McKinnon's whereabouts to himself.
"Is there something you wish to share, James?" Dumbledore said.
Remus' mind raced. He thought of the sanctuary and all those innocent kids taken. He felt the judgmental eyes on him as talks of the moon made the scars on his face more noticeable than ever. He thought of Greyback's army and the lives that were at risk. And now, Atticus McKinnon whom he felt he couldn't trust, was lying to his family and forcing James and himself into a lie they never agreed to while passing notes to Madeye. Well, he was done with lies. He was done with shouldering the burden of Greyback's sins. He certainly wasn't going to protect someone he didn't trust anymore, especially when lives were at stake. Before he could stop himself, Remus blurted out, "I assume Madeye is talking about Atticus McKinnon Jr. He's been living next to the sanctuary he and his wife started and likely watching it."
Remus looked at Dumbledore and his defensive tone was quickly washed away at the slump of the professors shoulders and the disappointed look on his face. It was more than disappointment. This wasn't the same look Remus received when he and the lads were caught in a prank. This was something more... something deeper... something that said 'Remus, you've no idea what you've just done' and it scared him. Remus stuttered, "I... I'm sorry sir. I just can't continue lying for someone that allows lives he's responsible for to be stolen away in the middle of the night."
Everyone was shaken by the scraping of a chair. It was Marlene. She'd pushed away from the table with such force that the flames in the chandelier above burst into nothing but small streams of smoke and the room dimmed. Sirius stood almost as quickly as she did to follow, but Angus grabbed his arm to stop him. The two exchanged a silent stare a long while, Sirius' more determined than Angus'. It was only a momentary look, but a silent understanding was communicated, and Angus released Sirius' arm to let him follow Marlene out.
"James," Lily whispered. "Did you know about this?"
Before he could reply, however, Angus said, "Atticus just came back to the castle today. Right before the meeting he showed up on our doorstep with barely an apology. He's there now. Marlene didn't take it well."
"I'm sorry, McKinnon," Benjy sighed.
"At least he got back home before Lupin here started running his mouth," Madeye fussed with an angry glare at Remus.
"Well, that's just it," Angus grumbled and stared down at the table. When he found his words he looked at Remus as if holding him personally responsible for his brother's actions. "You say he's married?"
Remus paled, not realizing he'd let that detail slip, and fumbled to find words.
"It's a yes or no questions, Lupin. Answer it," Angus snapped.
"Don't get worked up, Ang," Gideon whispered and tried slipping his hand into the other's only for it to be pulled away.
"No!" Angus shot out of his chair. "Fuck this, I'm sick of it!" He turned on everyone now, looking at each of them as they were addressed. "I'm sorry, Remus. I'm sorry for your losses recently and I'm sorry for how the world treats you, but you don't get to take it out on the rest of us. Potter, you have the nerve to bring your kid here knowing damn well my brother can't attend and is on the verge of killing himself some days because he thinks he's a threat to it?! For months, I've been held accountable for my shortcomings but nobody has had the balls to call you lot out on yours."
"Angus," Dumbledore whispered in a cautioning tone. "I know you're concerned but.."
"Did you know?" Angus asked as he turned on him. "About Atticus?"
"I did not," he said.
"But I did," Madeye grumbled. "And based on your tantrum, I'd say I had good reason."
Angus stayed fixed on Dumbledore though and said, "Scammander. Did you know he was going to die?"
"The curse Theseus had was a tricky thing, Angus."
"Did you know?" He said again then stayed silent.
Dumbledore scanned the room and everyone looked at him with pleading eyes as I they all begged to know the answer as well but hand't found a way to ask it. Finally he said, "Yes... it was inevitable."
"And Gideon?" Angus said with a break in his voice as the true meaning of his outburst and pain came to light. "And Fabian. Do you know about that?"
Dumbledore nodded and said. "When Fabian refused to leave his sister's house I thought there may be more than just grief playing a role. So I spoke with Seer Trelawney... and I see that you have as well."
"And yet you let them continue on, knowing what waits for them?" Angus said shocked.
"What might wait for them," Dumbledore said with the perfect balance of firmness but gentleness. "What might wait for all of us. But if we act out of fear base on the whispers of an uncertain prophecy, then we cement our own fates to be the worst case scenario. Prophecies can be warnings, but they can mean many things. Once we decide it's meaning for it, with no openness to interpretation, we have sealed our own futures and cannot escape them."
Something about this resonated with Peter. He seemed to slump in his chair only for him to sit up straight the moment he noticed Dumbledore was looking right at him. Feeling pressured to speak, he said, "W-what did Seer Trelawney say?"
Gideon sighed but felt the comforting hand of Angus on his shoulder then said, "Trelawney had a fortune about Fabian and I... that we are coming to the end of a path and that we will fall together and be forgotten."
"Oh Gideon," Lily sighed. "I'm so sorry. But it could mean anything. Don't trap yourself in a prison of worry. We won't let anything happen to you."
Gideon smiled, "All due respect, Lily, but I don't want to be your responsibility. Harry is your job now, not me."
"But you both are my responsibility," Angus said. "You're family now."
"Angus," James stood up. "I understand not wanting to trust Dumbledore after all you've unearthed today, but you have to. He's got our back. When we're upset, it's easy to find someone to hold responsible for our anger. We want these Death Eaters to be held accountable for their actions. We want justice to be served for the losses we've endured. We want to be mad at ourselves for not being able to keep control of our surroundings. All we can really do though, is expect that justice won't always be served and that sometimes people do get away with murder. Is that going to leave us sitting around in defeat and placing blame though?"
"No," Frank said aloud in support.
"No," James repeated. "Dumbledore is right. The future is what we make it. And we will not have it determined by prophecies or bullies." James choked a bit at that last word and it took the deepest strength for him to bring down a final wall of vulnerability to his peers. "I was a bully once... most of you saw it. Some of it was innocent kid stuff and other times it wasn't. Some of you let it slide," he smirked at Lily and said, "other's didn't." She grinned at him and held Harry close then he looked back to the others. "All my actions, I'm having to answer for today. I accept that. But I'm not going to let grown bullies who should know better by this age not answer for their actions." He looked at Dumbledore again and said, "I support Dumbledore and trust him. You say there is a Ministry to protect, sir. Then tell us how to protect it."
Meanwhile Outside...
Sirius wandered onto the grounds and towards the gardens, keeping an eye on the Marauders Map which he'd followed since fetching it from its hiding place. He made his way toward the greenhouses and picked up the faint scent of cigarette. Sirius quickly reached into his back pocket and smirked with pride as he recognized his cigarettes were missing. As he put the map away and pushed into the greenhouse he called, "Don't shoot. It's just me."
"Don't be so sure. You're still on my hit list," she coughed and Sirius followed her voice.
"You stole my cigarettes," Sirius said as he found her sitting on the planter of mandrakes. "And if you knock that table over and the mandrakes roll out, you'll be paralyzed."
"What can I say," she coughed uncontrollably. "I live on the edge."
Sirius just sat beside her, reached to her mouth as she pulled the cigarette to it, and took it away from her. She allowed him as she took some fresh air breaths as he took a drag.
"That's disgusting," she said finally looking at him.
"Your tongue has been in my mouth before, McKinnon. I think I've gotten over the fear of your cooties," he smirked then looked at her after another puff. "How'd you even get my pack?"
"Levitated it out of your pocket while we were sitting down."
"I thought you always lecture me about how these things will 'bloody kill you'."
"Well maybe I want to be dead," she said and stared at the floor.
"Hey," Sirius instantly softened at the sincerity in her voice. "You don't mean that."
Marlene rocked her feet as they dangled from the planer table and shook her head. "No... I don't. Sorry, I don't know what's gotten into me. I'm just... I just so angry so quickly these days. So defeated."
"You weren't defeated in Knockturn Alley. You saved us," he admitted.
"That was all you. You're the one who got my confidence up."
"Well... ok if you insist. Then it was all me who saved us," he shrugged and continued to take a few puffs of smoke and blow them out, but when he heard no response from Marlene, he glanced over at her. She continued to look at the floor expressionless. "Hey... you ok? Really?"
Marlene simply shook her head and a tear streamed down her face and caught the moonlight. Finally she said, "It's my fault my father's dead." Sirius said nothing, he just kept the cigarette between his fingers and sat still to hear more as she continued. "Ang said Greyback threatened to come after me if Dad got away from him. So... Dad stayed. He got Angus to safety and fought to keep Greyback away from me. Then he was killed. If Dad hadn't died, Atticus Óg wouldn't have left home. He wouldn't feel the need to hide his wife from us." She held her hands out in front of her and stared at them. "And this magic? I don't know what it is, Sirius. I think Marvin knows something about it but won't tell me. But when I bring it up he just seems... sad. Our whole family lives in nothing but secrets and I can't help but think that I'm the reason for it. Well I'm tired of them. I'm tired of secrets."
Sirius reached up instinctively and brushed her blonde hair from her face and tucked it behind her ear. When he spotted the tear, he wiped it off her cheek. She looked at him, meeting his eye, but saying nothing as he considered what to say next. For whatever reason, the only thing that came out was. "That day at Borgin and Burkes... you said..." He stopped himself. Why couldn't he finish it? Why couldn't he find the muscles to spit out 'You said you loved me? Do you still?' They were stuck in his throat. Was it fear holding them back? Or was it his new and improved subconscious being fully aware that she was too vulnerable for such a question? All he came up with instead was, "You said... I wasn't a screw up. Why?"
"Well... nobody's perfect."
"But I've done some pretty shady shit before," he shrugged. "Broke your heart didn't I? So if anyone here is a bad person, responsible for the misery of others, it's me... not you."
She knew his angle and smiled as she said, "You're not a bad person, Sirius. You're a very good person, that bad things have happened to."
Something about that statement resonated more with Sirius than he expected. He was only attempting to get Marlene thinking positively about herself, but her words struck his core as well, and he'd not soon forget them.
They smiled at each other in silence a long while, Sirius reach up to wipe another tear away, Marlene returning the favor by brushing a spare curl from his face, until they realize both of them had a hand gently caressing the other's face. In this place that had once been sacred to each other, they leaned forward slightly, keeping each other locked in a dreamy gaze. Marlene was the first to shut her eyes and lean further in, but the moment the eye contact was lost, Sirius pancicked. It was never a feeling he'd felt in this situation before, but now it was unmistakeable. He let go of her cheek and grabbed her wrist to gently pull her hand away. He leaned back and she turned pink as the two of them pulled away from one another. Not a word was spoken, just uncomfortable silence as they stared. Marlene looked broken, just as she did the night he cheated on her. Sirius looked dumbfounded and opened his mouth as if to say something, but no words came.
Marlene simply slipped from the planter and walked away, throwing the pack of cigarettes on the floor as she left in a hurry. Sirius sat a while longer, just holding the smoldering cigarette between his fingers. All the work they'd gone through to become friends again... Marlene steering most of that boundary... only for her to admit her true feelings. Sirius wasn't sure how he felt, but Marlene had just outed herself and answered his internal question. She was still in love with him... and deeply so.
A/N: So Sorry to the Marlene and Sirius fans for doing that to you, but I know exactly how their arch is going to go and I'm not going to budge on it! Sorry. Also, what would their ship name even be? Mirius? Sarlene?
The main role of this chapter was to remind us that these are just kids... but because of the war, a tattle-tale can quickly be pegged as a traitor by their peers, so everyone's trust is easily broken with a single slip up.
Next chapter we jump ahead to the trial. PLEASE REVIEW