It had been weeks since the proposal - weeks since Lois had answered his question in the way that Clark had expected least.
"Who's asking? Clark or Superman?"
Lois remembered the relief she felt when his expression gave away that she was right on the money - followed by a brief worry as she hoped she hadn't just royally screwed up his proposal.
Everything seemed to fit perfectly before then, how they seemed to perfectly blend working together and being together - but somehow it fit even more now. Casual Glasses-Clark using his powers around her was a bit exciting at first but now it was just a part of their everyday routine. The reheating of their coffee or breath cooling their bottle of bubbly had the same nature as him cooking their dinner or hanging their laundry.
It was a cool night. Lois Lane and Clark Kent were curled up in bed together in a slight food coma, window open in case Superman was suddenly needed. A documentary on Superman's earliest saves casually played in the background- causing Lois's mind to wander to Clarks first year at the Planet as Clark ran his hands through her hair half asleep himself.
She thought of how much of a bumbling clumsy fool "Mr Kent" was. How his glasses never seemed to stay up, constantly being pushed back up the bridge of his nose. How all his suits seemed just a little too big for him like they were some kind of hand-me-downs. He could never seem to eat anything messy without spilling some on his ghastly patterned tie. She smiled as she reminded herself that it was all an act - the 'bumbling, clumsy, stuttering Clark Kent couldn' possibly be the calm, collected, smooth Superman' scheme.
Her mind flickered to the times that she'd be visited by Superman - Clark disappearing from sight under the ruse of 'Calling for help'. Or when she'd finish one conversation with Superman and she'd turn around to see Clark arriving, always needing to tighten his tie.
Then suddenly something clicked in her mind as she suddenly sat right up as if she'd just had an epiphany.
"Holy Crap! That was you?" She blurted out of nowhere - a look of sudden confusion washes over Clarks face
"The time that Superman was blind - Clark was too" she clarified, only just realising the connection "Y'know from that Ultraviolet light thing"
Clark lets out a soft sigh, propping himself up on his elbows recalling back to his first year in the bullpen.
"Yeah that time was a hard one - trying to act like my parents weren't my parents was a tough one. I came so incredibly close to telling you that day" There was a twang of regret to his voice as if he still wished he'd told her that very day.
"You spouting out random bits of information was entertaining at least" He chuckles as he recalls Lois spurting a fact about conductive heating as he'd stopped the bacon from burning with his hand.
Now that Lois knew everything - Superman, Krypton, how the Kents had found him and taken him in - she was slowly realising how much Clark sacrificed to keep up his secret and keep those that he cared about safe. She couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt that he'd been unable to share his true self in Metropolis for so long, having to keep up appearances one way or the other. Lois recalled just a few hours earlier using his Xray vision to cheat at cards and how casual Clark using his powers for mundane things now felt.
Lois laid back down, pulling the cherry red covers back over her.
"Yeah, I remember you insisting that you just really wanted some Oolong tea" she chuckled slightly "You and Mrs Kent couldn't wait for me to get out of there"
Clark joined her in laying back down, wrapping his strong arm around her pulling her close. She noticed scents that reminded her of Clark and Superman simultaneously, honestly shocked that the scent alone hadn't given away his secret sooner.
"Yeah - I remember Dad reminding Mom before knocking that I was "Superman" not their son. I couldn't see but I could sure feel Mom's desperation to come running to my side" he admits, remembering how relieved to hear his mother's voice he was.
Looking back he wondered if he would let a 'mom' slip if he hadn't heard his fathers's warning to his mother before the knock. It was the first time he'd felt that helpless, but it certainly wasn't the last.
"Yeah It was rather tense, I think it was the first time I'd heard a layer of insecurity and desperation in Superman's...your...voice" Lois recalls "I'm pretty sure I was really harsh to Clark that day too, angry on your...well...Superman's behalf that Clark's parents were there to help Superman out but not Clark"
They are both silent for a moment, Clark no longer needing to reassure Lois it was OK with words, a soft smile being enough.
"You weren't the only one that was angry at me that weekend" He reminds her "Mayson asked me out to her log cabin that weekend remember? Perry and Jimmy thought I was with her when I didn't turn up for work -until she came by without me"
"Oh yeah I forgot about all that" Lois mumbled "Y"know we didn't like each other very much, always getting jealous of you and I didn't like that she couldn't see Superman the way I saw him...But that didn't mean she had to die"
Clark swallowed as a lump formed in his throat, he was still holding some guilt that he couldn't get to Mayson in time - something he hadn't yet found the strength to share with Lois especially since he knew she would blame herself too.
"Yeah I remember her not being too fond of him. She actually saw my suit right before she died, through my tattered shirt"
The silence falls again, Clark saw the recognised signs of cogs turning in Lois's brain as she broke the comfortable silence.
"How are you not exhausted all the time?" Lois asked "I mean, from keeping up these two separate personalities especially in front of us that know both sides of you" She let out a yawn, eyes fluttering threatening to close. "It's making me exhausted just thinking about it"
Clark turned off the TV and pulled Lois closer, tucking a stray hair behind her ear, his thumb lingering on her cheek for just a moment.
"It's all I've ever known really" he whispered "Even before Superman there was the Clark that was bad at sports and blind as a bat - and the Clark that could bench press a tractor and do all his farm chores in 5 seconds flat"
"Well it doesn't have to be anymore" Lois placed a soft kiss on Clarks lips "I love all you. All of Clark, All of Superman, All of Kal-El" She grinned as all the times she found herself in love with Superman and Clark simultaneously made so much sense.
"I love all of you too. All of the prize-winning reporter, All of the Chocoholic, All of the TaeKwonDo Champion" He soothed as Lois slipped to sleep. Clark took a second to take in her sleeping beauty before he allowed himself to drift off too, joining his to-be wife in the land of slumber.