A/N : I really loved writing this chapter :)
Hikigaya-kun has returned.
The last time I saw him he was in a hospital bed. Now he was in front of me, staring into the depths of my eyes. His eyes that I had missed so much during the time I couldn't see him.
In the clubroom, I noticed that his skin was subtly turning paler. His voice also lost in energy. I could feel whenever he moved or talked a word how badly his sickness was affecting him.
And observing it was so painful because I'm used to looking at him so often, I can't help but notice the most subtle details and changes. I wish I could stay delusional, that I could not have noticed them. But I have.
I struggled so much to stay composed in front of this sight.
When he confronted me on the school's roof, I poured out all my feelings of hurt and anger towards him. I meant every word I said,I was wounded, and he was the cause of it. I needed to voice my feelings, to let out all the thoughts and emotions that had been building up within me. I had allowed myself to be too lenient with him for far too long.
Everyone has their own limits. I have mine too. And Hikigaya-kun crossed them.
I walked through the streets, filled with the falling rain. I held my umbrella over my head to protect myself. But this umbrella was strangely inefficient today. I could still feel the raindrops on my face.
I suppose, I should change it.
I thought about something.
Since I'm about to leave the club, I must inform Hiratsuka-sensei.
If only I could skip that step... but that's impossible. The last time I talked to her, she encouraged me to reach for Yukinoshita. She placed her hopes on me, and she confessed that she wanted to congratulate me on something.
If I announce to her that I am going to leave the Service Club, what kind of reaction should I expect from her?
I will surely be scolded, and told how wrong my choice is.
But I failed, so my current choice is the only one I have left.
"Good afternoon, Hikigaya-kun."
No, Hachiman, you can live a few months without hearing it just fine.
"You're okay?"
Stop thinking about it, it's over.
"What are you looking at, Hikigaya-kun?"
That rotten mind of mine couldn't help but relentlessly replay her voice in my head, forcing me once more to re-examine my choice.
It was at the very moment when I needed to rely on logic and reason that my emotions seemed to surge the strongest, taking over my thoughts and clouding my judgment.
"Please, stay a little longer..."
"..."
No, Hachiman, stay in focus. Don't let it get to you.
Yukinoshita would never say this kind of sentences in the future. She hates me now. I won't be able to fulfill Haruno's request, unfortunately.
As each stride I took carried me further, so did my thoughts about her continue to fill my mind, becoming harder and harder to ignore.
The Service Club was the one lifeline, the only tangible thread connecting me to Yukinoshita. To step away from it would be to sever that connection, letting it burn into oblivion.
But it has to be done. Doesn't it?
Yes, it does.
It would have been done sooner or later, anyway.
So let's not let some emotional thoughts slow me down.
As I moved forwards in that hallway, my wrist was suddenly grabbed by a tight grip. I looked behind me, and saw Yuigahama keeping me from going any further.
"Do you know what Yukinon looked like when she learned that you were dying?" she asked, the same shaky voice of hers resonating in my ears.
"I can easily guess it."
"Yukinon has never cried so much, her emotions were so intense that she had an asthma attack!"
Asthma attack? Really?
My eyes went wide in shock, unable to mask my surprise, as I swiveled to face her.
There she stood, a petite figure with her hands grasping my wrist. And she was looking at me with a pleading expression, her gaze imploring, begging for me to reconsider my decision
"Did you guess it, huh? Can't you realize how much you mean to her? Can't you imagine how much... she cares for you? I don't know what would have happened if I hadn't gone to find her when she went to the bathroom to cry alone."
"..."
I cast my gaze downward, my mind filled with countless images of Yukinoshita in a state of distress. The idea of her having an asthma attack over me was something I never thought possible - and now, the realization of her devotion to me was overwhelming.
Cutting ties with her right now is really my only choice?
"See... Yukinon can't hate you..."
"I'm... I'm lost."
"Yukinon is currently facing a lot of strong emotions. She doesn't hate you, in fact, she's mad. She is mad because of how much she loves you!"
Her declaration left me completely stunned, my heart thudding unevenly in response. I met her gaze head-on, searching her eyes for any hint of uncertainty, but could find none. She genuinely believed that what she said was irrefutable fact.
"I'm sure that if you manage to make her feel strong emotions, the positive ones... She will get over all the negative feelings she's been feeling since you were away from her. Do you understand, Hikki? Do you understand... What you really have to do..?" Her eyes shook, struggling to hold herself back from bursting into tears in front of me.
Each of her words caused my heart to accelerate.
"You have only one thing to do, Hikigaya."
Hiratsuka-sensei's words resurfaced at the same time.
I took a deep breath and moved my hand to slap myself.
"Woa?!" Yuigahama didn't hide her surprise.
Damn it, I was about to do a huge mistake, a really huge one.
I didn't realize sooner that I was about to repeat what Isshiki's grandfather was doing. How stupid I'm looking right now, especially since I am the one who suggested him not to take this way, and now I was about to do it.
I don't know if I were naturally stupid, or if it's my illness that's damaging my already rotten brain.
It doesn't matter, now I realize it.
"Yukinoshita doesn't need me to stay away from her..."
"She needs you to stay with her." Yuigahama ended my sentence instead of me, her fingers slowly losening their grip on my wrist.
"Thank you, Yuigahama. For preventing me from making the worst choice."
Her lips curved into a bittersweet smile as a tear rolled down her cheek. The expression on her face was far from what I had expected. It was as though she felt both happy and pained at the same time, a complex mixture of emotions that was difficult to comprehend.
"You're welcome... Hikki. Now, go. Your time is limited, right? So you can't waste any seconds."
"But... You're sure you're okay? You-"
Yuigahama hurriedly turned my body around and pushed me forwards.
"You don't have the time to worry about me and my so little troubles. Someone needs you much more than I do..."
"...I'll see you later..."
"Good luck, Hikki..."
I walked forwards, but stopped to look one last time at Yuigahama. She was smiling wearily, waving her hand in a calm motion.
Yuigahama is right. I can't waste a single second hesitating. I turned around and walked out of the school building, ignoring everything on my way.
Once outside the school, I ran. I didn't care about the fact that my body could be easily exhausted now. I had only one thing in mind, find Yukinoshita and make her smile as I promised.
The rain wasn't holding back, but that wasn't going to stop me. The rapid beating of my heart, the feeling of adrenaline filling my senses, it all made me realise that... I needed her too. It was almost instinctive, from the moment I supposedly made the decision to leave the Service Club, my mind and heart fought against my own will.
Even if it were for a few months, I couldn't bear the possibility of living the rest of my life without her.
No, I really couldn't.
No matter what it'll take, I'll reach to her.
I ran even faster, my clothes getting more wet by the water, the edges of my pants staining. Fortunately, I know where she lives, and her apartment is big enough to be easily noticeable.
Right now, I feel like if I stop in my track, I'd collapse onto the ground and miss the chance I was given today. So, I kept going, without looking back. Ignoring what my body was telling me, I was only guided by one thing.
My heart.
"Hah... ah... uh..." I tried desperately to catch my breath.
My legs could no longer take me any further, but at the very least... I had reached my destination. The apartment building where Yukinoshita lives loomed before me, and with a single press of the button, I would be connected to her voice.
As I stepped inside the building, the atmosphere suddenly shifted from one of cold, rainy outside to a warm and cozy interior.
I took a deep breath and finally pressed that button.
"..."
"..."
"..."
"Who's here?" Her soft voice came out from the speaker.
"...It's me."
I didn't need to introduce myself, just the sound of my voice was familiar enough to her, as hers was to me.
"Hikigaya-kun? What are you doing here?"
"I came to talk to you."
"What happened to you? I can hear your loud breath through the speaker."
"It doesn't matter, I just came to see you."
I'm still exhausted from all the running to here. So, trying to hide would tire me more.
"Why now? You could talk to me the next time we meet, on Monday."
"...I considered leaving the club."
"..."
I was given only her silence. I couldn't see if her face were expressing some kind of emotion. The silence continued, second after second, leaving me waiting for a response from her.
But I received nothing.
After what felt like an eternity, the speaker turned off.
Was I supposed to see this as her refusal?
No, Yukinoshita would have told me if she sincerely didn't want to see me. So, I'll wait. Even if it takes hours before I get anything, I'll stay here and wait.
There's also the fact that my legs are too tired to move anywhere else, though, so the choice isn't only mine.
As I stood in the lobby of the apartment, a sound caught my attention. The hum and whir of the nearby elevator signaled its imminent opening. I put all my attention on it, my heart racing with anticipation for who was going to step out of its confine.
Then, the door opened.
There she was, stepping out of the elevator car, her elegant form coming into view as she emerged. She had changed out of her school uniform and was wearing more casual attire. Her deep blue eyes quickly settled on me, as if taking me in from head to toe. She walked closer, her left arm crossing over her body to grip her other free arm, a cautious and thoughtful gesture.
"Look at you, all soaked. Your hair is a real mess now. Have you run all the way here?"
I stepped closer to her as well.
"I wanted to see you."
My answer provoked a furrowed brow on her face
"It's pouring heavily outdoors, and the chill in the air is quite biting. Why on earth did you do that? You're sick, you know that, right? It was incredibly risky!" Her tone was laced with concern, her words expressing both disappointment and worry.
"I know. Said like this, it might sound foolish..."
"You're really an idiot, Hikigaya-kun."
Okay, it doesn't start well. The first second I see her, I manage to make her angry against me.
However, the concern in her tone was genuine, the worry she felt seemed to take over her angerness in that moment.
"Thank you for accepting to talk to me."
She looked away. "...You talked about leaving the club, were you serious about it?" Her stunning eyes slowly shifted back to me, the look in them so intense it could rival the power of the rain pouring outside.
"Yes. I... I did think about it."
"That's why you came? To inform me of your departure?"
"Yuigahama told me that you had an asthma attack."
Her eyes widen as I mention the information, but she quickly regains her composure.
"Yes, that's true. What does it have to do with your announcement of leaving the Sevice Club?"
"I changed my mind. I will stay."
She let out a soft exhalation, her chest slowly rising and falling. It was as if she was releasing a sigh of relief, the invisible weight of anxiety that had been burdening her suddenly feeling lighter.
"That's all..?"
"Yeah, hum... No, I mean..."
Say it, Hachiman. What has been weighing on your mind all this time? Why are you struggling to say it out loud to her? It shouldn't be that hard. Hurry up, you don't have all the time in the world.
"I'm sincerely sorry. I know I did a lot of stupid things that have hurt you. I'm all too aware of how unbearable I am. I know that just seeing me hurts you. But... Right now, I have only one desire... Only one thing I'd ask you. After that, I won't bother you anymore."
Only one thing, Hachiman...
"Please allow me to stay involved with you for my remaining time."
Her eyes widened, her lips trembling as her mind took the time to process my words. Just saying all of this caused me to feel a hint of tiredness, as if it were an intense physical activity.
But, I suppose it mostly comes from the palpitant rhythm of my heartbeat.
"The thought of cutting ties with you is unbearable, it feels like a part of me would die inside."
"Wh-What are you saying? You were already supposed to stay in the Service Club..."
"No, not with all the mess I made between us. You said I was the one supposed to repair what I've broken. That is the real reason of my arrival. To fix...everything."
Genuine... Be genuine.
"I know that it might sound selfish. It will hurt you to watch me deteriorate as the time passes. But I really need this... I need... to stay connected with you as much as possible, otherwise, I won't bear it."
Her lips quivered open, caught between the torrent of emotions swirling within her mind. The words she intended to articulate refused to form, as the overwhelming storm of thoughts and feelings left her struggling for composure.
"What's gotten into you... To suddenly throw all these meaningful words at me...when my heart is already so heavy."
"If they're too annoying to deal with, then throw them away. If I'm bothering you, you can go back in that elevator and leave me here. I'll understand it, my life isn't worth much right now."
What does Yukinoshita earn from it? Exactly, nothing.
"I don't have anything worthy enough to give you in return except for some meaningless things like my feelings and time. I'm nothing more than a sick and selfish fool asking for something I don't even deserve. But that's the only and last thing I desire right now. So, please, let me be a part of your life for a little longer..."
She raised her hand and hit my chest with it, letting the palm of her hand rest on the area where my heart is located.
"Ouch..."
"You're really... unfair." Yukinoshita said in a low tone, her feet guiding her closer to my frame.
"Everything in me is unfair. If I could, I would have given a whole lifetime instead of a few months."
She raised her head, meeting my gaze, and a blush dusted her cheeks. My words, apparently, had stirred something within her — something difficult to express yet evident in the brightness that shimmered in her eyes.
Her hand squeezed the fabric of my jacket as she spoke.
"I want to believe it."
"Me too."
"You're a lucky one, you know that?"
"Me lucky?"
"You're lucky to be the one I need most in my life..." She confessed, slowly moving her body closer to mine until it made contact with my own. She then buried her head into my shoulder, closing her eyes and indulging in the sensation of the warmth emanating from me.
Wow, she's soft, and light, and very soft, and also pretty, and... yeah, she's a lot of things.
"That's stiff."
"I don't know any other way to say it so... deal with it."
She shifted closer, pressing herself against me with a firmness that was unmistakable. I could feel the uneven rhythm of her breath, her hand grasping onto my jacket with a desperate grip.
She allowed her body to relax against me, fully entrusting herself to my presence. In that moment, I could acutely perceive the weight of my decision, mirrored in the sensation of her leaning on me, as though the burden of my choice was tangibly manifested in her touch.
My hand moved skyward, gently closing around her body and drawing her towards me. There was an urgency within me, a need to seize the moment and gather her closer.
I think she might have felt the same thing, which could explain why she trusted me when she leaned onto me.
Her fingers loosened their grasp on my jacket, and her arms encircled me, her intention crystal clear—she had no plans to let go anytime soon. I responded in kind, my own arms wrapping around her as I felt the overwhelming desire to hold her close consuming me.
I have no idea how long it lasted. I didn't count the minutes.
The only thing I'm sure of is that it took a long time for her to finally let go of me.
"...Thank you." She said shyly.
"No, I thank you for finding the strength to tolerate me a little longer."
"You got my clothes a little bit wet..."
"Sorry..."
"It's okay, you apologized enough tonight."
I looked behind me, seeing that the sky had darkened since I'd left the school. Then I let out a tired sigh.
"I hope there's a monorail stop nearby, I don't think I'll handle another big walk."
"Monorail?"
"I mean, to go home. I'm not sure-"
"No."
I raised an eyebrow, my eyes meeting back hers as she held an unbothered expression.
"You're staying over tonight."
"Eh?"
Her unexpected order caught me off guard, leaving me speechless. My jaw sagged open slightly, a mixture of surprise and disbelief etched across my features.
"There is no way I let you go outside in this time with all the rain, especially since you're sick." She explained in a serious tone, her hand quickly reaching to grab mine as she pulled me with her, heading towards the elevator.
"W-Wait I-I'll need to make my parents know..."
"You'll do it later."
"Sure..."
She hastily pressed the button of the elevator to summon it, the doors opening a few seconds later. We entered the cabin as its doors closed behind us, the elevator starting its rise.
I glanced down at my hand still held tightly by Yukinoshita's. I didn't mind it at all, so I wasn't going to say anything about it. On the contrary, I put on a slight squeeze with the intention of sending her the subtle message that I am okay with it.
Seeing the small smile that curved on her lips was quite a cute sight to watch honestly.
The doors of the cabin opened, meaning that we've arrived at her floor.
We silently made our way to her door, then she pulled the door handle and opened it.
"Make yourself comfortable," Yukinoshita said, closing the door behind us as we entered.
She let go of my hand and walked past me, probably heading to the living room or kitchen.
Guess I'll finally be able to take off this soaked coat-
Oh...
My uniform underneath is sweaty as h-!
"I'll look if I can get you a spare of clothes." Yukinoshita walked away.
Great, now I'll need to try not to show how sweaty I got under my coat from the running.
I thought back then that running all the way was worth it, but now I start regretting it. Of course, I'm not saying I'm not happy with the turn of events now, just that it has its flaws.
Alright, all I need to do is take off that coat and run to the bathroom right after.
I quickly removed my coat and put it aside, I took a step forward, looking around for where the bathroom might be.
"Ah..." Her voice rose from behind, sending a small shiver down my spine.
"...Yeah, I know..." I turned around, facing my unavoidable fate.
Letting her see my sweaty uniform.
"There... You can use the bathroom to shower if you want." Yukinoshita said, and instead of giving an awkward look, she simply smiled at me and pointed at the door leading to the bathroom.
"...Thanks." I took the clothes from her and made my way to the bathroom, locking the door behind me.
I took a deep breath and quickly got rid of my top sweaty uniform. I found myself staring up at the ceiling, replaying everything that had happened earlier.
I can't help but think: what if I hadn't come? What if I had just given up and left the club? What if I had decided to stop running when my legs hurt and my heart begged me to stop?
All those scenarios kept swirling in my mind over and over, the more I sank deeper in these thoughts, the more I felt grateful towards Yuigahama for not having given up on me.
"Would you need help with the shower, Hikigaya-kun?" Yukinoshita's voice from outside snapped me out of my thoughts, reminding me that there is only one scenario that is really happening here.
The scenario written by the great auth-
I mean the scenario where I decided to take decisions with my heart.
Though I couldn't help but slightly blush when she mentioned 'helping me with the shower'. Stop it, Hachiman. It is not the moment for this kind of thoughts.
"Everything is all right. I won't take too long."
"Okay, I'll be preparing the dinner. Have a good time, Hikishower-kun."
"Thanks, thanks."
Well, let's get this over with.
Those clothes aren't too small, they fit quite properly with my frame. I have no idea how she's got this kind of clothes, though.
I finally left the bathroom, now totally clean with more comfortable clothes. And the sight that welcomed me was the odor of an appetizing meal. It's Yukinoshita we're talking about, of course I'm going to eat very well.
I went to the kitchen where Yukinoshita was still cooking the dinner, getting to see her in an apron once again.
She looks cute in it, so I don't mind.
"Smells good."
"You did some intense activities earlier just for me, so it's only fair that I reward you with a proper meal." She said, tasting her food.
"How kind of you. May I help?"
"I'm fine cooking alone, you don't have to bother helping me."
I approached her, taking a closer look at the food that was being cooked.
"I insist. You're eating too, right? Consider that I'm only doing this for you."
She sighed. "You're insufferable."
"I warned you."
She smiled softly and gave in. "Alright, but I will do the most of the cooking."
"Yes ma'am."
The kitchen was filled with a cozy and intimate atmosphere, the warm glow of the overhead lights casting a soft hue over the small space. Yukinoshita moved around the kitchen with precise, practiced movements, her actions both elegant and efficient.
I stood beside her, occasionally helping with the preparation, our hands brushing against each other now and then in a way that sent tingles down my spine. There was a domesticity to the scene, a comforting feeling of familiarity.
Every so often, our eyes would meet, and she would offer me a small, shy smile, her cheeks tinged with a hint of blushing pink. The air was thick with a mixture of the scents of cooking food and the subtle scent of her perfume, almost too distracting for me to stay focused on the task at hand.
"All done." Yukinoshita announced as we finished to cook.
"Finally."
"Let's set the table."
We worked together to set the table, our movements falling into an easy rhythm as we arranged the plates, silverware, and glasses
Once we finished arranging the table, we took our seats next to each other, the distance between us small yet significant.
"Itadakimasu."
"Itadakimasu."
The first bite of food I took was enough to give an opinion on the result of our work.
"Delicious."
"Glad to see you're enjoying it."
I glanced at Yukinoshita, calmly eating, the expression on her face clearly showing that she was enjoying the meal.
Her long, luscious black hair fell across her shoulders, framing her delicate face. Her deep blue eyes gleamed in the light, like pools of water that reflected the surrounding scenery. I felt my heart skip a beat as I looked at her.
Damn, she's so beautiful, even more when I stare this closely at her.
I couldn't help but continue to stare at her, taking in her every feature. Her slender neck, her small, button-like nose, her soft, full lips. Everything about her was perfect, flawless.
I get to see what an angel looks like before I die. Yukinoshita was right, I might be a lucky one.
Her eyes met mine, holding my gaze for a few seconds before a flush spread across her cheeks, adding a touch of cuteness to her face.
"Are you okay..?"
"Oh, hum, yeah. Sorry, I was thoughtful for a second." I said, tearing my gaze away from her.
I can't stay focused a single second here.
She placed her utensils down and scooted her chair a little closer to mine.
Then, with a swift and unexpected movement, she reached for my hand under the table and intertwined her fingers with mine. My eyes widened in surprise as I looked at her, taking in her flushed state, her cheeks tinged crimson.
She hastily averted her gaze and continued to eat her meal, as if nothing had happened.
"I-I don't know what you're thinking about but try to focus on this moment between us, okay? I don't want you to have dark thoughts while we're trying to spend quality time together."
Oh, I see...
She might have misunderstood my stare and began to worry about me.
"I'm okay. I was just... looking at you. That's all."
"Oh, okay. I overthought it, I suppose."
Even after I reassured her, she kept her fingers intertwined with mine, as did I. We both continued to eat in silence, enjoying our meal and the warmth of each other's hand.
After a few minutes, we finished eating at around the same time. And we quickly found ourselves cleaning the dishes together, that reminded me of the last time we did such an activity, though it didn't end well.
But, this time, I could assure confidently that everything was going to be alright for the rest of this night. I don't know why, but I felt much more at ease alone with her than the last time. My heart was beating fast, but its rhythm was much more regular.
"That's the last one." I said, giving the last dish to Yukinoshita which she cleaned in only a few seconds.
"All done. That was... really nice." She turned to me, her fingers pulling a strand of her hair behind her ear.
"Yes, it isn't too late yet. Is there anything you'd want to-"
Before I could finish speaking, Yukinoshita abruptly leaned her body against mine, her hands clutching the fabric of my shirt tightly. She nestled her head against my collarbone, her breathing coming in short, shallow gasps against my neck, and her hair tickled gently against my chin.
"Anything will be fine... As long as I can be this close to you, I won't mind anything..." She murmured, the rise and fall of her chest brushing against mine as she breathed steadily.
"...Then, why not a movie? T-The couch is big enough, isn't it?"
I felt her smile curving on her lips against me as she nodded.
"Fine, let's watch a movie..."
I led the way out of the kitchen to the living room. Yukinoshita grabbed the remote as I comfortably settled on the soft couch.
"Could you move your arm a little bit?" Yukinoshita asked shyly, the crimson reappearing on her cheeks as she looked away slightly.
Hey, don't be like that you're too adorable!
Although I didn't understand why she asked me to move my arm, the moment I saw her gaze flickering to the spot right next to me, I quickly understood what she meant.
"Sure." I responded, shifting slightly on the couch to make room for her.
She lowered herself onto the couch and nestled against me. Her head rested comfortably on my chest, our thighs pressing together as she wrapped her arms around my waist. In response, I instinctively put my free arm around her body, pulling her closer in a gentle embrace. We held each other like that, our warm bodies pressed against each other in a soothing cuddle.
"Will it be fine for you..?"
"My heart is handling it surprisingly fine."
"Good, now, do you have any film in mind?"
To be honest, I wouldn't mind any films right now. I mean, no matter which movie we're about to watch, I will be cuddling with Yukinoshita at the same time. So, just that fact already makes me happy. Now I simply needed to think of a film that she may like.
If I try to search in the deepest of my memory, what have I heard about recently?
One particular title popped in my head, I think it should catch her interest.
"I've heard about an adaptation named 'Hello, Mister Panda.' Have you heard about it?"
What question am I even asking? It's Yukino Yukinoshita here, of course she must have heard about that.
"Yes. It is an adaptation of the original manuscript of the story in an animated movie format. I had read it when I was younger. I always wanted to see it on screen..."
Looking into her eyes, I could see a spark of excitement in them, as if she was already thrilled just thinking about it.
"I guess we have found our film for tonight," I said, picking up the remote control.
She glanced at me, her small, childlike spirit shining through in the gleam of her eyes.
She's so adorable...
After a bit of research, I managed to find a website where the movie was available for streaming. I clicked on the play button, and the movie finally began.
She tightened her embrace, her eyes completely immerged in the movie, the moment she saw Pan-san, her smile could just never leave her face anymore.
"Hikigaya-kun..."
Her voice caught my attention from the movie on screen, I glanced at her and asked. "Yes?"
She closed her eyes as if concentrating on her next words.
"The amount of happiness I'm feeling right now... I have never found it anywhere else, and I never will."
"..."
I was stunned by her declaration, I couldn't spell out a single word. What was I supposed to reply to it? I really had no idea why she decided to say something like this out of nowhere, especially right now.
Yukinoshita herself didn't seem to wait for an answer from me as her attention directly came back to the movie in front of us.
Since I couldn't find any word to give in return, I chose to act.
I put more strength on my arm, pressing her tighter against my frame as I let my cheek rest on the top of her head, the scent of her hair filling my nostrils as I closed my eyes, letting myself immerse in the moment of intimacy with her.
I yawned as the credits of the movie rolled before our eyes. I glanced down at Yukinoshita, noticing that she was asleep. Seeing her made me want to sleep even more.
The clock on the wall indicated that it was 11:43pm.
A sudden weak yawn left Yukinoshita's mouth, her head lifting a little bit as she woke up.
"Oh, I missed the ending..."
"Seems like you're really tired."
"It can't be helped." She slowly sat up from me, the absence of her warmth quickly felt.
I used the remote to turn off the TV.
"It's late, we should get some sleep." Yukinoshita stood up.
"I guess so." I also got up from the couch.
"I'll prepare my bed so you can lay comfortably there."
"No, I'll be fine with the couch. You don't have to sacrifice your bed for me, really." I turned around, looking down at it.
I don't think I will be bothered by its size.
"I would prefer that you keep your own bed for tonight, so I'll see if I can find a blanket and a pillow for myself."
But when I tried to take a step forward, something immediately stopped me in my tracks.
"...When did I mention that I would sleep on the couch?"
That is... unexpected, to say the least.
I slowly turned to face her again, taking in the sight of a blushing Yukinoshita. Her hands were holding mine tightly, as if she was afraid I would pull away. She avoided meeting my gaze, her shyness making her cheeks even more flushed than they already were.
Don't be so flustered, or I'll get flustered too...
I couldn't help but feel an intense heat traveling across my cheeks as I thought twice about what she'd said.
"S-So the bed..?"
"Y-Yes, the bed..."
As soon as we agreed to share the bed, I felt like we were teleported to her bedroom. Yukinoshita went to her bed and quickly removed all the toys and Pan-san stuffed animals that were on the bed to make more room for the two of us.
Sorry, guys, but someone else's gonna steal your place.
"You're sure about it..?"
"I'm fine with removing them all. I'll have you, so it's much better."
That was not what I was talking about, though. But I'll be happy with what I've got.
Next, she walked over to her closet and picked out a pair of pyjamas, placing them delicately on the bed. Then, without a word, she moved her hands to the hem of her top and-
Wait, wait, wait!
"I-I'll leave the room so you can have some privacy..." I turned to the door.
"You don't have to leave..."
"..." I gulped.
"Keeping your back to me will be enough."
"O-Okay."
I didn't know she became that comfortable around me... I shouldn't see this as a bad thing, of course, but it still leaves me surprised.
Even though I couldn't see her, the sound of the buttons on her clothes being undone, the fabric rustling as it was removed, and falling to the ground or mattress was still able to reach my ears. With each passing second, the sound grew more and more tantalizing, distracting me from my thoughts and everything else.
"You can look now."
I finally received the signal of turning back to her, and I then did so.
And the new sight was...
"Cute..."
"W-What?" A crimson pink crept across her cheeks.
"H-Huh, nothing, sorry, my tongue slipped."
"S-Shall we?"
Yeah, just let's get to the bed already.
"Sure."
Yukinoshita lowered herself onto the bed first, her arms shyly lifting up in a silent invitation for me to join her. I obeyed the silent request and lay down beside her, pulling the blanket over us as the lights were extinguished.
She scooted closer, placing one hand on my chest and the other lightly touching my chin. Her delicate, slender fingers traced soothing circles on my skin, while her eyes remained locked with mine. Even in the darkness that enveloped us, our eyes remained locked as we gazed into each other's eyes, silently observing each other's very souls.
"I want to hold you." She whispered, her arms gradually sliding around my neck.
I don't know what kind of games she's decided to play tonight, but it's a dangerous one.
The mood pushed me to play along with it, don't ask me why, I... I myself don't know what I'm doing.
"Make sure to never let me go." My own arms moved on their own, encircling her waist.
"I promise I won't..." Her eyes slowly closed, the sound of her voice growing softer in a gradual and soothing way. "I will never let go... Because if I do... I... will never... be able to catch you again..." Her voice finally faded away, and her body relaxed as she succumbed to a tranquil sleep.
The beautiful Ice Queen fell asleep in my arms.
My heart raced, beating furiously in my chest, yet the intensity of the moment only heightened my excitement and anticipation.
It felt so intimate, everything that I lived today was all a first time for me, and so was it for Yukinoshita. It was such a pleasing experience... I wanna share it again with her.
This girl...
This wonderful girl sleeping so close to me...
I want her forever.