Kim takes in a deep breath outside her parents' door. She feels oddly formal, dressed in a light blue blouse with white cuffs folded to her elbows, a black pencil skirt pulled past her waist. Which is all underneath her massive parka.
She also feels sort of guilty; she's been staying in Middleton for a day now. After the mission in Kansas, the one where she and Shego — wow — it made more sense to just drop her off in Colorado than go all the way back to New York City so Kim could commute from there. But her parents can't know that probably.
The door opens and it's Mom that greets her. She pulls Kim in hard around the shoulder, and Kim forgets to hug back.
"God, it's good to see you," Mom sighs so wistfully, so happily, holding Kim in place. Kim wishes she could appreciate her more.
Kim looks around the house, taking it all in. It's the house that she grew up in, remodeled after Lowardia, but it really doesn't feel like it is hers. She's disassociated from it. She slips off her parka and hangs it on the coat rack.
"How are you?" Kim asks in monotone.
"Good," Mom smiles, nodding towards the kitchen. "How do you take your coffee?"
Kim raises an eyebrow. "How do you know I drink coffee now?"
"I just figured," Mom squeezes Kim's hand. "Black?"
"Yeah," Kim sighs. Her parents always know. She takes a seat at the table and tries her best to ignore Ron at the very head of it all. She neatly folds her hands into her lap, trying to focus on her brothers. "Hi everyone. Long time no see."
Her dad almost looks choked up. "So, um," he coughs. Harumph harumph. "How's New York, Kimmie-cub?"
"I like it a lot," Kim says immediately. "Uh, you two are in Boston, right?"
The Tweebs nod; they're going to MIT.
"Uh, hey!" Ron chirps from the end of the table. "I'm here too, KP."
Kim side eyes him, an ugly wrinkle folding under her eye. He used to be so beautiful to her and now, even when his face is smooth and smug, she can only see his anger lines… and that fire in his… blue… eyes…?
That's new. Blue eyes. Ron has brown eyes. But today they're blue. Dark blue.
"Ronald," Dad chides. "Come on now. Kimmie-cub's just tired."
Mom walks into the room, steaming cup of coffee in hand. She looks like she's anticipating something to happen, and well, she's right.
Kim ignores Ron but looks at the family. She imagines Shego at her side, how it feels to bask in her glow. "I'm sorry, I can't do this if he's here. Ron, you need to leave. Now."
Ron laughs like it's a joke, and then gapes when it's not. "Wh-what? Oh come on, KP! Can you believe her, guys? Girl calls me, tells me not to come, and then calls me again to say that she's—"
"Ronald," Mom mirrors Kim's icy tone. "Please get out of your house."
Dad raises an eyebrow and checks Kim's expression. "Whatever Kim and Anne say, Ronald. Please."
Ron grits his teeth and gets up in a huff. "Fine, whatever, don't be surprised when she changes her mind on me again…" He stops in the doorway, letting cold air blow in. "Oh, that reminds me. Kim, you mentioned that thing to me."
"Ron, go," Kim spits. "And don't text me ever again. I'm blocking you."
Ron flinches in the doorway, Kim can see it from her peripherals, and then he sneers and pounds the door frame before walking out.
Kim finally breathes out and slouches in the chair. She's sure that won't be the end of it between him and her though. But damn, it feels so good. After everything he's done to her, to see him throw a tantrum and get thrown out like that, she loves it.
"I'm really sorry you had to see that. Um. I don't want to talk about what happened between us but… Ron, kinda…" She clamps her eyes shut. Don't cry. "...I only let him come because he tried to blackmail me."
Mom grabs for Kim's arm, gently massaging it. Doesn't really help, but definitely appreciated. "Kimmie, it's okay. We can talk about it later, let's eat, alright? Do you want to help me take the food out?"
"Yes," Kim feigns a smile. "I really do, just…" She taps the tablecloth. "...I want to get this out of the way. Otherwise he'll tell you and I don't want that."
And then Kim says nothing, staring off into space. Where does she even begin? What should she not say?
Dad coughs. "I've never seen Ronald act so uncouth. I'm hoping that's not his usual behavior around you."
"Worse than that," Kim sighs, and feels her words wash through the room. "Mom, you called me yesterday and made a joke that it sounded like I was dangling off a helicopter."
Mom mouths her astonishment and leans back.
Kim frowns. "You… uh, were exactly right. I'm — I'm back. I'm doing missions again."
Kim lets that sink in. She's dreaded this for a while now, imaging she would feel like a relapsing mental patient in her confession, and well, she does. It was a big fucking deal when Kim quit, everyone was reeling in shock, having no idea what kind of pressure Kim had been under this whole time. It felt like drowning, and to know she's back?
She just hopes it isn't hurting anyone.
"They're… more dangerous than before," Kim explains darkly. "I'm not allowed to tell you who I work for. I'll say it's not Global Justice, or the government but um…" Her frown twitches into a light smile that almost feels inappropriate. "...I like being back. I feel alive right now, and um…" She rubs her wrist. "...it's only been a few weeks, I wasn't sure if I should tell anyone. I was kind of wiffly wafflin' on whether or not I'd stay but… yeah. Does that make sense?"
No one says anything but there's an unmistakable shine in her family's eyes, and that kind of gets Kim going. She rubs her eyes.
"You can't tell anyone, it's top secret," Kim adds on quickly. "But… yeah, now you know my secret. I'm back. I'm happy, and I'm kinda sorta dating a girl right now."
Mom leans in, elbows on the table. "Ooh, do we know her?"
Kim flushes. "Yeah, but it's not the one you're thinking of."
Kim knows Mom is thinking of Bonnie because she figured that out before anyone else did. They never talked about it, but Kim had definitely talked on the phone with Mom before where Mom would say things she could only know if she had figured out Kim and Bonnie were friends with benefits.
Kinda liberating though that her parents aren't cagey about Kim sleeping around.
"It's Shego," Kim breathes out.
Quiet settles through the room.
"Those are all my secrets," Kim finishes. For some reason, she looks to her Dad.
Dad reads the room and props his chin onto his knuckle. "Well, I hope she can come along with you next year when we do this again. Let's eat!"
Dinner goes well and after a while, Kim loosens up and has a really good time. But the fallout of Ron's exit is still with her, and it keeps her up at night when she tries to sleep in her childhood bedroom. She doesn't even tuck herself in, she just lays flat on the bed motionless.
She's almost grateful when a rock pelts her window. She heaves herself up and creaks open the window and the screen, sticking her head into the night. She's hoping it's Shego, visiting her after guessing Kim probably had a rough day but no; she'd be so lucky.
It's a blue phantasm shaped like Ron. It motions for her to come down, and having nothing better to do, Kim climbs down the shingles, closing the window behind her, and drops beside the spectre. By then, it has already moved on, gliding down the street. Kim follows the thing at a safe distance, and it takes fifteen minutes for them to reach their destination: the courtyard to Middleton High School.
Ron sits at one of the lunch tables, pale and sweaty. She sees the glass bottle in his hand and expects the worst. He rocks it up and down, apparently losing control of his noodly limbs.
Kim doesn't sit, she stands about ten feet away from him, hands jammed into her pockets. She looks at him coolly as the phantasm fades. "What do you want."
Ron hiccups and looks up, stunned. The bottle clatters to the ground and he gets up, nearly trips over himself. "Kim!" he bites down a sob, rushing her for a hug.
She's done this with him before. He comes in crying, begs for her forgiveness and for some reason, she grants it. Ron gets to feel better about himself and does the same shit again. It's hard to resist the compulsion to let it play out as it always does. But she does. She has to.
She holds up her hand and Ron eyes it with confusion, and steps back. He wipes the snot from his nose and looks to her, stunned. "Kim—K-Kim—I'm sorry for what I did today. I've been a real shithead to you, and God, I hit you the other day and—"
"—no shit, you hit me. It took me a half hour to cover it up in makeup so your abuse didn't become a thing today," Kim finds it hard not to yell. "Stop it."
Ron keeps rambling. Lots of mentions of how fucked up he is.
He cries the same way he does when he loses video games too. His tears are never in good faith.
"Ron, I said stop it!" Kim yells and that seems to get his attention. She gestures for him to take a seat, and settles down across where he should be. He drops in and stares at her, pulling out another bottle.
Kim holds her hand out. "Give that to me."
Ron shakes his head, so Kim reaches over and steals it from him. She runs the tin lid against the edge of the table until it flies off, and she empties the beer into the grass. Honestly, when she grabbed it she didn't know if she was going to drink it herself or empty it.
"You don't want to be like me," Kim scolds. "I drink too much and it's destroying me most days."
Ron looks away, still sobbing. "Why'd you have to take them away from me, Kim? They're all I have left."
"What? They're my family—"
"—but you don't even talk to them much, it's not fair that I'm the one who—"
"I can't believe I'm having this conversation with you," Kim hisses. "Unbelievable. What the Hell do you want? Why'd you drag me all the way over here? I'm considering calling you a Lyft and walking back home in a few seconds if you don't get it together."
Ron blinks stupidly and shrugs. "I'm lonely, Kim."
"Too bad," Kim frowns. "You don't get to put that on me, not after everything that's happened. You need help, Ron."
"I know," he croaks. "I know I'm fucked up…"
"No you don't," she accidentally yells. She tries to steady herself. "If you really knew that , you'd have gotten help by now. But all you do is call me and take it out on me, and by tomorrow guess what? You go back to your old shit. I'm done with it, Ron, I'm done with you."
She feels bad in the moment for yelling at him, he's weak and she's strong. She's lashing out when she doesn't need to, but God, after everything he's put her through it's so cathartic. To just let him have it.
His eyes are red and cracked, probably from all the tears. Which reminds her.
Blue eyes. Blue eyed Ron. Not good.
"I need to ask you something," Kim says, making very deliberate eye contact. "Your eyes are blue. Do you understand what you're doing to yourself right now?"
Ron wipes his finger under his nose again, blinking away tears still. "Yeah. It's been like that for a while, you didn't notice? Oh, well, we don't hang out so… yeah."
Kim nods, feigning understanding, so this doesn't go too poorly. "It's your powers, right? You're just kinda letting them… take you, yeah?"
"Yeah, they help me out a lot, save me energy and shit, you know…" Ron looks at her, face flushed. "I don't get sick or whatever when I'm like this."
"Ron, but you are sick."
"Fuck you." There he is, back to anger already. "You come at me, yelling at me, and try to tell me how to fix my life and—"
"Ron, you're mentally ill," Kim practically begs. "I'm not saying it's just the powers, but letting all that energy live in you like that can't be healthy. Listen." She checks their surroundings to make sure they really truly are alone. "Listen to me," she repeats.
"What?" he groans.
Kim explains it slowly.
"I think by now you probably have an idea on what I do for work. I know for a fact you are on our hit list. Your powers are dangerous when left unchecked, the proof being our relationship," Kim pauses for a second so it sinks in. "If you continue to live like this, someone will come for you and it might be me, Ron."
She gulps. "I might be asked to kill you."
Ron gapes as if offended.
Kim doesn't let him speak. "If not for your own sanity, do it for your life . I am promising you, someone will come for you, and maybe you'll kill them in self defense but eventually they will end you. Do you understand?"
When he doesn't say anything, Kim gets up to leave.
Ron shakes his head. "The fuck am I supposed to do with that? I can't just like, get rid of my powers, I am my powers—"
Kim holds up a finger. "I don't care, Ron, okay? It's not my problem, but I am letting you know because for some reason, part of me still wants good things for you." She shuffles awkwardly in place. "We didn't have this conversation, I am going home now. Don't talk to me again, it's not safe. I'm sorry."
Kim turns away and she doesn't look back, swearing under her breath. That is not how she wanted that conversation to go down. When she does make it back home, she's even more anxious than she was when she left.
Kim lays in bed for hours, watching the black sky go dark blue to cyan. It's almost sunrise. The words still echo in her mind… because immediately after landing in Middleton the day before, Kim was intercepted and given a message.
" Your mission, if you should choose to accept it, is to find a way to steal Ron Stoppable's powers from him so that they may be destroyed. If this proves to be impossible, your mission will be to kill him. Good luck, Kim. "
At least… there's no timeline on this one. It's not her sole focus for the next few weeks but it's there.
Try as she might, Kim's life is tethered to Ron, they can't get away from each other. She supposes she could have rejected the mission but she knows if anyone's going to pull it off, it's her.
Besides… some idiot part of her brain tells her she can still save him. She knows it's bullshit. But it's what she does. Kim saves people, even if they don't deserve it.